The Fundamentals of Tefillin with Rabbi Kalman Flaks

Heat. [music] Heat. [singing] [music] [singing] >> [music and singing] [music and singing] >> Okay, everyone. We're going to jump right into it. We'll sing a little bit at the end. Uh we're going to dedicate our Torah study as always to the protection of the entire Jewish people. Always need our prayers, our to protect them throughout. So we're continuing the last phrase of last week's we got up to the powerful words. Okay. And we theorized that that's really the main reason why we quoted this specific Mishna and this specific Gmorrah as the first things that we teach every that we remind ourselves every single day. Why specifically do we did did we choose that? Because they stress can I get they stress the importance of Torah study. So, we're giving ourselves a a little bit of a psych up, a push to learn Torah strong because after all, Torah is equal to everything. So, I wanted to jump into that a little bit and ask what exactly does that mean that Talora is equal to everything. And we're going to try to start with, I guess, of a more practical perspective and then and then a little bit jump into a little bit of a uh more mystical perspective. If we have time, we'll jump into the topic of fillin this week. Um, and we'll see how much time we have for that. Okay. So, tomato and egg. You would think it's not really such a controversial topic. tomato equals everything. But it actually is a bit of a controversial topic in particular in our days. Okay, what do I mean by that? So I was reading an interesting article by Rabbi Sliffkin recently. He writes about the fact that some people use the phrase in Torah equals everything to kind of exempt themselves from doing other mitzvot. Right? So, not to get myself into too much hot water, but for example, there are some people who are not they they don't want to serve in the in the army and they say I'm not going to do that mitzvah because instead I'm going to be learning Torah and after all we say every day. So in other words, the question is what does it mean? We say Torah can get does it mean instead of doing other I could learn Torah or maybe it means something else. So that's that that's that's what Rabbi Slifkin discusses in his interesting article in his new book. And um he brings a few sources. Yeah. other people use it to mean instead of instead of doing all the right things. >> Well, it is that what it means that maybe instead of going to help that lady cross the street, I'll just learn Torah. Or maybe instead of uh getting a job, I don't have to send my kids to get a job. I'll just learn all day and that's the only mitzvah that I have to be concerned about. So, there are a number of sources in Kazal which seem to indicate a different perspective. But let's first just jump into that question. What does it mean to connected kula? So there's a few gumaras which say that there are other mitzvah which are connected kula which are equal to all the other mitzvah. Anybody remember any other mitzvah which are compared to fulfilling all of the other 612 mitzvah. What comes to mind perhaps? Shabas >> Shabas >> the ini says keeping shabas is equal to all of the other mitzvah. Now naturally that resonates within us but wait a second there's a little bit of a problem. I thought learning Torah is all the mitzvah. How could chabas be all the mitzvah? What else? What other mitzvah are mentioned are equal to all the mitzvah? >> Maybe like living in the land of Israel. >> Very good. It says in the gar in Zara living in the land of Israel fulfilling mitzvah of is all the other mitzvah there's even ramifications maybe certain isan we could do on chabas sign the contract on chabas because it's equal to filling all the mitzvah so wait a second I thought only tora wearing tits in two separate gar is equal to fulfilling all of the mitzvah. Right? I tell my bar mitzvah boys and they're putting on their talis, you're fulfilling all the mitzvah every time you wear your tits. Yeah. Reminds you of all 613 mitzvah, the kamatria, right? Okay. What else? As I was learning about fillin, it turns out wearing is equal to all the other mitzvah. Pretty good. Okay. What else? Nadarim writes equal to fulfilling all the other mitzvah. And finally teaches us actually Nadarim and is equal to all the other mitzvah. So what's what's going on? By the way that's I don't know if that's an exhaustive list. There may be other mitzvah that I'm not aware of. So what what's the point that we're trying to make here? Point is that it must not literally mean it's like doing all the mitzvah because then the math just doesn't work out. Rather saying that it's equal to all the other mitzvah. Maybe it's a way of saying this is really really important in some spiritual sense. It's connected the idea behind it is connected to all the other mitzvah in this. easy to understand that because 613 or maybe askin suggests it means it'll lead you to do the other mitzvah. If you do this mitzvah it can lead you to do the other mitzvah. It's very understandable in the case of Torah, right? Because when you learn Torah, it leads you to do the other mitzvah. So it's more of a practical perspective is is is what is the way that Rifican would like to understand it. He brings a proof that the source is paleo. We're quoting from a from Mishna. That same garra talks about an a which is kulam. It says that there's certain a which you get punished in this world but the principle is in the next world. Right? Like like we talked about last time there's a mitzvah you do rewarded in this world but the principal reward is next world. So there's an ara and what is that? So it says and idolatry sexual immorality and murder the lash can get kum and lash is equal to all of them. That's the lion of the shami ina. So does that mean would anyone actually think that speaking lash and har is worse than murdering someone? Let's say someone right now, come on, let's be honest. Someone puts a gun to your head, says either murder that guy or talk about the rabbi and say, you know, his his beard's too long. You know what are you going to do? Let's be honest. You're gonna you're going to talk about the rabbi. Don't think literally that speaking lashara is actually worse than killing another person than doing a photo doing the three cardinal sins. Rather in some way lashara has bits a taste of uh of those three sins or well you could say it leads you speak l it's going to lead you maybe to doing those other sins somehow. That's one way of explaining it. The same way is simply pointing out that it's not doesn't not meant to be taken literally that and learning Torah and therefore it's better than fulfilling all the other mitzvah. There's some practical element of tama Torah which leads you to the do all the mitzvah. And that's the first perspective which I wanted to show you a few sources which indicate this perspective of what's so special about Torah because practically speaking when you learn Torah it should lead you to fulfill the other mitzvah. So the says it very explicitly it's greater learning Torah than doing good deeds. Because when you learn Torah, it's going to lead you to do all the other mitzvah. Once a person stops learning a lot of Torah, it dries out. He's not going to have the motivation and he's not going to have the knowledge to fulfill the other mitzvah. So, you should learn Torah because it's going to lead you to do the other mitzvah. Who brings this down? The Mishna Torah. The Rambam. The Ram writes, "There's no mitzvah that's equal to likely." What's the Ram referencing when he says there's no mitzvah that's equal to he's referencing our right that's what he says mitzvah is equal to all the mitzvah so the Ram says in what way is it equal to all the mitzvah because learning Torah will lead you to do the other mitzvah so why is Torah connected get kam because it leads you to do everything else. It's not a replacement for everything else. Rather the whole advantage is that it gives you the motivation to do the other mitzvah. But what's the the other mitzvah the actions says the it's pretty important source right of Ysef learning Torah is equal to all the mitzvah again referencing our but if you have a mitzvah if someone else can do that mitzvah Don't stop learning. You have a mitzvah of learning, let the other person do that mitzvah. But if there's no one else who could do that mitzvah or no one else could do it in the same way that you're going to do it, you're going to do it in a uniquely special way. So then you should you should learn you should uh do the mitzvah because Torah is there to motivate you to do the mitzvah. It doesn't replace the other mitzvah. It's what you do when you don't have any other mitzvah to do. I remember I I asked one of my when I was in yeshiva I was invited to I think it was a bris and it was not someone I was that close to and I would have to give up my so happens with weddings you know I went I was I went to yeshiva in the old city so it was weddings like every other day. So should I go to the wedding or should I not go to the wedding? Should I go to the bris? Should I not go to the bris? So what did my rebby answer? He says it depends. Depends on a lot of factors, but one of them is is your presence there going to uniquely bring him sim in a way that someone else won't. The other factor you have to take into account is what's what effect is it going to have on your to in your Torah study and on your weigh those things because if every night you're going to go to another brisk go to another wedding go to another thing but wedding is a little different wedding there's a mitzvah of like hello to participate in a brisk it's a big thing but it's not explicitly a mitzvah it's it's a good thing so he says it very much depends on are you going to uniquely contribute something that no one else can bring and on the flip side how much will it affect your Torah study especially if you have a kava ka you have to weigh those factors and it depends on the situation. I remember once I was uh I made big chabas meals in the old city once upon a time. I was making a huge meal and it was like 40 minutes before shabas. The whole day I was cooking and and then I really needed help from to to to finish up making the shabas chairs and everything so that I can go back shower and go to the hotel for ding. And I saw my friend and I said, "Hey, I need some help shleing. Can you help me? You slept some chairs." And he looked at me and he looked at his schnai mikra and he was learning. He said, "I'm in the middle of my schnai mikra. I'm in the middle of I thought that was an inappropriate decision because I really needed him. There was no one else that could have helped helped him. He could have learned and and that was his mitvah to do at that moment to help me not to finish his learning. He could have finished his learning another time. On the other hand, if he saw that there was plenty other people to help me, I don't think there's any problem for him to stay in the base matters and stay learning. So, in other words, it's very dependent on on the situation. Does someone need your help or does someone not need need your help? But the no one is suggesting in all these sources in the in the instead of doing my obligations, I'm going to just learn Torah. But rather the beauty of Torah is that will lead you to do mitzvah. Okay, you with me so far? So far, we've a very, I guess, practical, rational uh perspective on on on the importance of learning Torah. At the same time, it must be noted that there are plenty of sources in kazal and certainly in the mystical sources which kind of put a whole different lens on the importance of tamora on this phrase. Can I get ka? How do I express that? So we have a a commit. It says near mitzvah or a mitzvah [snorts] creates a candle, a vessel, but the Torah itself brings the light. There's something special about learning Torah that that uniquely shines into the world the God's presence and more than any other mitzvah. Okay? And you certainly see this all throughout. If you ever opened up, it's all over the place. The importance of learning Torah. I believe in the second chapter of teaches us. Have you learned a lot of Torah? Don't think you're all that. That's what you were created for. We're created primarily to learn Torah. So, it certainly seems to be putting Torah on a pedestal. This is a very very special mitzvah. We have the concept of bal Torah which means a Jew ideally shouldn't waste any time right and and if you could be becoming a great Torah scholar if you could be using your Torah your time productively and you're not you're you're in a way sinning. You don't find that concept so much by why aren't you going to do there's something unique about Torah that when you're not doing it it's like you're taking away from the light that you're supposed to bring into the universe right there something unique about Torah that we have this concept of bet Torah now obviously a person can't shouldn't be neurotic about it you have to find the balance you know I have to do other things for my mental health sometimes I have to eat I have have friends, I have to play sports, etc., etc. And every person has to know their the balance that that can work for their mental health. But in a ideal world, there is this concept of BT Torah which is unique for Tomato Torah. Okay. Another um what else comes to mind of the unique statue? We have this concept of the Keser of Torah. A person should grab the Ker of Torah. Ram says that's a person who's really completely dedicated to Torah study, right? He's all he cares about is Torah study and that person takes the crown even higher than a co the person who's totally dedicated. And we do know there are certain people who who just completely dedicated themselves to Torah study. It talks about Shimon was exempt from many mitzvah because his entire life was just [clears throat] Torah study and that was he was completely completely dedicated to Torah study. But at the same time the Gar concludes that many tried like and failed and many tried like he said learn makeim but also go to get a job and they succeeded. Meaning to say the conclusion of the seems to be there will be school certain people be completely totally dedicated to Torah study but most people need to have a balance need to go to work and learn and that's what the the norm for the Jewish people but you can't deny the fact that there is such an element of certain certain special people who are totally totally immersed in Torah right and they shun all pleasures pass the toal just eat dry bread, no extra pleasures. They're completely trusting God and immersed in the world of Torah and and and now this perspective um is stressed in particular in many of the cabalistic works. So for example al- he was a great daran invat and he writes that the light that you bring into the world when you speak words of Torah it's uncomparable to the lights of any other mitzvah again the the near is a vessel but the kanaka light itself the organ is from the Torah study it brings light into the world and it brings brings light into our souls. So there's something uniquely special according to about Torah study. This perspective was also stressed by the this great student of the of the and in the fourth chapter learned it inside one day he goes on and on about how every word of Torah it's having amazing infinite effects on the super spiritual worlds and that [snorts] it's unbelievably powerful and brings so much blessing into the world And that that perspective was clearly from his rebi the gr who never wasted a moment. the end of his life he had like a diary of all the moments of not learning Torah when he could have been learning Torah and it was like a couple of minutes like the whole thing like he is he he he hardly slept and the GR speaks about how what's unique about learning Torah is that every word of Torah is a mitzvah for other elements you know every mitzvah you do creates an angel but every word the GR says and right now if you're listening to me I know I'm talking a lot then show you're getting a mitzvah for every word I speak right. So you want me to talk a lot? Yeah. Stop with all the jokes. Just more Torah. That's what the GR says. The GR was very strong by the GR. Even though he though he was a mis naged, he was very connected to the Cabala. He was a genius in Cabala. And this is based on the words of the Zohar that the world is created through Torah. That God looked into the Torah, created the world. So in that mystical cabalistic perspective is not just another mitzvah but it's our primary way to have with the keshbu to attach ourselves with the kadesh. Now inidis they they shifted it a little bit and they say on the one hand Torah is study is so so so important but on the other end there are other mitzvah which are so so important like ding which according to many is even higher than learning or being or serving Hashem through eating and other ways but is also if you read open up theidic words they're just as amazing and empowered by by Torah study. Okay, so basically where do I stand on this? Not that my opinion matters. I don't know. Let's read the words of the my rea sums it up at least for me very beautifully. So read it inside of course is a author of he's a and the therehu and one of the greats of our generation in my opinion he writes the most important is learning Torah it's equal to all the mitzvah right we heard that for the you get it's equal to all the other mitzvah there's two main reasons for this if you don't know the mitzvah you're not able to fulfill the mitzvah right if you don't know what to do you're just not going to be able to do it by the way I forgot to mention another metaphysical principle is that there are certain mitzvah that we're probably likely not going to encounter too much in our lives or hopefully we will mashia comes but doesn't come up too often but by learning about it according to the kabala I'm actually fulfilling that mitzvah so that's another advantage of learning Torah not just practical mitzvah but even mitzvah like the core I don't I can't bring the core but by learning about it every day I'm actually fulfilling that mitzvah according to the mystical ma masters in any case it's spiritual essence is higher than all the other mitzvah. There's a practical and there's a spiritual. Every Jew needs to know the foundations of the mitzvah. You need to learn because learning leads you to actions. By the way, he in this particular chapter, he doesn't mention it, but later in his book, he goes on to define exactly what a Jew needs to know on a basic level. Not just every Jew needs to know this. And he says, okay, this these this amount of this amount of Mishna, this amount of GRA, this amount of not by amount, by what are the basics that you need to know in order to just be a knowledgeable functioning Jew? And once you read that, you realize, wow, there's a lot to learn. There's a lot there's a lot to learn just to you know just to finish his list it'll take like shaalid without any stops but that's he writes down a little bit of you need a little bit of a little bit of and a little and the of course and so but first all you need to be knowledgeable you can't fulfill the mitzvah if you don't know what you're doing of course you would include the knowing what you're saying right the highest spiritually. We are all a body and a soul. All of the other mitzvah are connected to the body. But learning Torah happens through your thoughts. I would also add in through your mouth. So it's the most spiritual mitzvah. When you learn Torah, I would also add in your soul gets expressed by learning. We lift ourselves beyond this world to the world of eternality. When we learn Torah with all of our free time, we connect to the world of eternality. And then the whole world exists because of our Torah study. If we would stop learning Torah for even one moment, the whole world would return to chaos. As it says in your if not for my covenant the the earth earth laws would would explode. That's why you know in certain yesas they would they would make sure they had shiro every at all hours of the night so that there would always be Torah in the world because someone wasn't learning Torah the whole world would just you know implode. So that way and thank god that we have Australia people learning here and then you know we have different time zones but so we don't have to stay up but that's the idea that Torah is kadma to the bria so the kitser I think they're both true on the one hand we have to recognize that the whole point of learning Torah is to bring us to mim So that we've stopped doing mitzvah in order to learn Torah. But on the other hand, when we are learning Torah and when we have free time and we not immersed in some other mitzvah that needs to be done, we should recognize the unbelievable privilege we have to learn Torah to do the most amazing spiritual mitzvah that connects us to our soul that brings brings the down into the world. And of course there's particular times which I'll you know recommend or you know when you're eating you need to make sure your Torah your your meal if three are eating and they don't have Torah between them then it and they're it's considered uh it's like eating dead dead carcasses. But if you bring the Torah into the meal you lift up the meal to a much higher level. So when you're eating and of course we should always anchor our day in Torah study right from right the first thing we do we should make sure we have a set learning in in the morning and at night and all of our free time when we're not doing other mitzvah we should immerse ourselves in mit in in Torah and when we do it we should recognize that we're so proud we're doing the most amazing spiritual mitzvah in the world we're watering let's say you could put it like this we're watering the trunk which is going to have an effect on the whole all all the branches it's going to give us the motivation the desire to connect to Hashem and to do all the other mitzvah, but at the same time, it shouldn't be instead of doing the other mitzvah. We need to be able to find that balance and each one, you know, should find our own way to finding the right balance between uh doing and learning. Okay, so that's where I'm at in terms of this homorra connected kulum. And uh our second half of our shir I wanted to dedicate to a the next part of David something we haven't covered yet but it's a little bit connected to our first part of the year and that's the mitzvah of fillin. Okay. What does fillain have to do with Torah? Any particular connection between those two concepts? >> Torah or fillin? >> Fillin fillin and Torah. And one one of the writes one he just points out that it's written in the Torah one of the reason why we wear should wear fillain so that the Torah should be in our mouth from Torah itself we see that there's some sort of deep connection between fillin and Torah interesting and hopefully we'll get back to this topic we will from that he postulates that it could be that might One of the explanations why specifically men are the ones who are obligated to wear its fillin because men have let's be clear both men and women have an obligation to learn Torah. That's why who says Torah in the morning? >> Everybody. >> Everybody. Because both are obligated. There's one small difference that men are obligated to learn those parts of Torah which are not practical which have no practical ramifications very much relates to what we were saying before there's a practical element of you know what to do and then there's learning the whole daf even though you know at the end of the day this stuff has nothing to do with my life but there's some spiritual something out there that it's going to affect me it's going to it's going It's good for my soul when I learn that daff of garamara. And men are obligated to do even the non-practical elements, the practical stuff too. Don't forget about the practical stuff. But that's and therefore that obligation is specifically on men more than women. Women have other obligations instead of that. And so maybe that's why is dafa the obligation of men and not women. Interesting. Okay, that's what Rev Neol writes in one of his articles. Um, there are other explanations as to why men specifically are obligated and not women. Since we're on the topic, let's just jump into it. Why not? I'm not going to be able to cover all the things I want to say about fill in anyway. So, let's just start. So, wearing fillin is a time bound mitzvah. Okay? We have to wear it during the day. We don't and we don't wear it on Shabas. >> Shab at night >> or at night, right? Chabas is an o is called an o. We don't wear it on chabas and we don't wear it at night. So it's a timebound mitzvah. Therefore on a just technical level women are exempt from all timebound mitzvah and they are not obligated well almost all uh time and therefore that's a technical reason why women are not obligated to wear fillin. Okay. But the big question is of course but what if they want to do the mitzvah. So take for example other examples of time bound mitzvah. There are certain other ta mitzvah which not only are women allowed to but we encourage them to do those mitzvah. Okay. One example would be can you think of any examples guys? >> Lulov lul love is a great example. We we encourage them to do it. Why not? You don't have to do it but it's a good thing to do. And us Ashkanazi folk, we even say a braha. Even though you don't have to do it, you're allowed to say a braha. Okay. Several other examples of mitzvah like this. So why not encourage women to also wear fillin? What's the problem? Yeah. What have you guys heard? Yeah. What do you think? >> They're exempt, but they're also exempt from uh sitting in a suka. We don't have a problem with them sitting in a soo. So why should we have a problem with them wearing a filling? Yeah. >> How one time once a year it's like you're supposed to do >> it's every single day. >> Okay. So what why why should that matter? Maybe every day. >> So what did you say? So the cycle what did you say? >> So there's a few different [clears throat] suggest now. Again it's not explicit. No Gary's point. Yeah. It's an everyday occurrence. So it would on a on a practical level he he's got a very good point. Some have suggested that the whole what's the whole idea of of time bound or not time bound. It's that um it's going to interfere with their other obligations especially if they're of childbearing age you know and so if every day they're worrying about going to minion and wrapping the fillin and doing all the other things that us guy folk have to do they're it's going to distract them. They're going to have the same issue that I have every morning of should I, you know, take care, take my kid, do the diaper or run the shot or get the chakras on time. Okay? In our generation, us guys are still still sometimes have that problem. But women don't. My my wife doesn't have to worry about that. She knows exactly what her obligation is and if she has extra time, she'll squeeze in, you know, a domin. But, uh, but she knows what's what's what's priority, so to speak, and they don't want to confuse the issue. So it could very well be Gary that your explanation is a practical and good explanation. Uh there are other suggestions given by some rabbis. Um one of them is that you know before we jump to women I'm going to go on a side point. Let's start talk with men. We'll get back to women for a second. Do women do men should men wear fillin all day? So, I want to read us something maybe surprising. When I saw this, I was surprised. >> Some If you go to the old city today, you're going to see some people who do do that. Um, I'd rather learn it inside. If not, I'll quote it to you outside. So, okay. I I'll I'll quote it outside and then I'll find it inside. It seems pretty clear that in biblical times there's a lot of stories which indicate that men used to wear tillin all day. There's a story of a guy running away from the Romans and he has to take his fillin off. There's many stories story one of the great rabbis he said I never left one of my why I had a long life is because I never left Daladamus without fillain without situs and without Torah. He was always wearing fillin. So it seems pretty clear that at least at in certain talmudic times people men would wear fillin all day. That was the norm. Okay. So what happened? Why don't we wear fill in nowadays? All day. So writes 37th chapter the mitzvah is really to wear fill in all day. but the thing is we need to have clean body. You shouldn't flatulate. You shouldn't think of anything impure, unholy. You shouldn't look at any images that are inappropriate. Okay? And not every person should is able to to be careful about that. So the custom at some point develop not to wear all day but if you want to wear fill in we don't protest and they get it's in other words what's the ideal it's unclear for most people were not ready to wear all day but some people who can handle themselves watch their eyes and and watch their bodies. Sure, they get reward for it. No problem. Okay. Very interesting. In fact, the gr the villagon speaks about this and he writes if it was up to him, he would reinstitute that everyone should wear fillin all day. We should go back to Tammudic times because fillin brings holiness upon a person. It brings a certain seriousness. You're wearing you're like the co you have the name of God on you. The Mor says you know who's allowed to make a joke only someone who's wearing fillin everyone else. We're afraid that the joke is going to you know if he's joking around too much then he's going to lead to sins but someone is wearing fillin he has a fear of God. So fillin brings holiness upon a person. You're in a different world when you're wearing fillin. That's the ideal. And therefore says the girl, ideally everyone should wear fillin. Okay, there's a story about the fillin of the you know you guys know the story about the when he passed away he wanted to make sure his wife would be taken care of. So he said sell my fillin make a lot of money off of it. He knew he was going to die. He died at age 47. told his wife but make sure that whoever wears my fillin never stops thinking about holy holy holy words when he's wearing millin so that's what happened she sold the fillin she made the money the guy takes that fill and as soon he puts on the fill in he's in a different world he's flying high and then one day one day someone asked him hey what time is it and he told him the time but he had his filling on and that was it he stopped feeling the holiness And they checked the fillin and the fillin had all dried out. All the ink had disappeared. He didn't feel the holiness because he wasn't on the level of the or to make sure that every sing now technically you could say what time it is when you're wearing fillin. Don't don't misunderstand the story. But the point is that the more you hold your brain there, the the holier that fillain will be. So fillain brings you holiness. And the ideal world, we should all be wearing fillain. That's why the Zberman's guys in the old city started wearing fillin all day. They said we're the base mish all day. We can we can control ourselves. We're back in we're going to do it like the grow would have wanted us to do it. It's becoming a trend. On the other hand, the end of the day and the mainstream practice is not to wear fillin. Why? Why don't we wear it fillin? What's the practical reason? Realistically, we're not we're not there. We can't control our thoughts. We don't want to come to sin. Not only that, we truly we eat a lot more than in previous generations. Okay? And that leads to some body issues that they didn't have. You know, they don't have after a fast day the same things, you know, certain certain issues. And the reality is therefore we don't trust ourselves. See, even us men folk, we do the minimum. We just wear them for shakers. Some people put them on for for Okay, most people don't want to take a chance. You don't want to show them. We don't have to. So we're just going to do the minimum even though we know what the ideal is but okay so based on that explanation that's why some suggest we don't encourage women to wear fillin because they're not obligated to wear fillin okay and since they're not obligated to do trillin we us men have no choice so we got to do the minimal they do have a choice so we don't want to get into any issues of especially if there's menstruation involved of of issues that could be that could could lead to doing a sin while wearing fillain and so better not to get into it. Okay. >> Apparently Rashi's daughters >> Oh, I knew someone was going to bring up Rashi's daughters. So, first of all, [clears throat] if anyone finds a source for Rashy's daughters wearing fillin, I'd be very curious. I'm very interested. I've heard about other people too or's daughters. I There is no source that I know about that that that actually says that Rashi's daughters weren't filling. Not saying they didn't. I'm just saying there's no source that I'm aware of that they did. So I don't I don't know if they actually did. Um I don't know where that came from. And if they did, who whose fill were they wearing? Cuz you know Rash's children Rabenu Tom. So they were were they wearing Rabenu Tom's filling or they wearing Rashi's? It's going to it's going to be shias issues. Um but the point is uh but but who which woman did wear fillin? says in the gar that remember Mik the lady was screaming at me back in David. Yeah. So she warts fillin. That's what the garamar says. It was a tradition that she warts fillain. Imagine she wasn't the only one but she wor fillain. Okay. So it does seem pretty clear from that gamarra the rabbis didn't protest. The garra doesn't doesn't object to the fact that she she works filling. So it could be that certain school certain very very special people were able to be on that level and at the time the rabbis didn't object. Nowadays many rabbis would say it's inappropriate. They say it's already become a man clothing. So now it maybe it's a issue of begadish because nobody does it and for her to start doing it could be problematic. Interesting. Since you brought it up, I just mentioned uh the uh I think he's the Benishai who writes, "You know why Mikall wore fillain?" Because she had a man soul. There's different feminine souls, there's man souls, there's female souls, and she knew somehow that she had a female soul. So, she used to wear the fillain. Interesting. Yeah. >> Learn something new tonight. Yeah, that's there's a lot of the says that I'm sorry of uh faji he writes that's why we'll wait for another year when we you know talk about male souls and female souls and all that just that's not really our topic for tonight but it's interesting since we're on the topic I I I I did want to mention uh ah we're already controversial so we might as well go there the safer writes in his time he explicitly writes and some women wear fillin and he doesn't think it's problematic he didn't have a problem if a woman wanted to wear fill in apparently at that time period it wasn't so crazy he says it's okay and in our time what about our time I mentioned hope I don't get him in trouble but rahammed writes that if a girl comes up to him and says says, "I'd like to start wearing. What do you say, Rabbi?" So the Mishnab writes, actually the writes, "We should we should protest. That's not what we do nowadays." But so he says, "Listen, you tell the girl there's many other ways to connect to that. You don't need this. Don't mimic the guys. You have your own mitzvah. Don't do you don't need to do that." But if she insists she really is a burning desire, she just wants to connect to Hashem and fill in her way to do it. He says, "Okay, you don't you don't need to protest. Tell her do it in private when no one else is around, but you don't have to make a big deal about it. It's fine. It's not it's not it's not a sin in its essence," says Rah Muhammad. You just don't tell the masses to do such things. But at its core, Rev Muhammad feels it's not really problematic. When I first read that, I was in shock. But that's what he says. And the sources do seem to indicate that he's on to something. Kathlan had a little bit of a different approach. He says, if you look in the garra, it talks about someone else who wears film. It's not a man, it's not a woman. Who is it? Hashem. It says in the garra that Hashem himself wearsin okay and what's written in his fillin the love of a kadesh the love of the Jewish people a quoting how much he loves us so it's fillain that god wears is his way of expressing his love for kesh for us okay by the way what does that mean what's the whole idea behind fill in for us why do be weird filling in that case to express our love of and that's love your god dot dot dot and bind that love of hashem on your arm and on your heart and on your head on your actions and on your emotions and on your intellect tie your f middle finger get engaged with hashem Fill in is meant to be a tangible reminder of our love of God. It's like some man you love someone so much and they give you one little ring and that's all your only physical way of connecting to them. So that's that's what fillain is. It's our physical way of expressing our love to so what's filling of it's his physical way of expressing his love for Hashem for us. Yeah. So Hashem wears filling. Now what about women? Don't they want to express their love for Baracle? So Kaplan suggests based on various cabalistic sources Kaplan is super well steeped in the cabala says they have a different way of emulating a kadesh that us men folk can't even come close to. And what's that? There's a lot of things, but in particular, one is giving birth. Giving birth is the most creative act possible. It's the e the most way to be like God is to be able to give birth. So built into the essence of a woman is this internal way of emulating God. Us men, we don't have that. So we need this external way of wearing fill in to kind of connect ourselves to a kadesh but in but in their essence and women's essence according to Maharal and many other mystical works they're more connected to that spiritual essence and therefore it's superfluous to have fill and they already have it. Some people like this approach. Some people find it I don't know uh they they don't like it. I find it to be true for my I don't know for my 38 years of life. I almost always find when I give an optional shear. I used to work for like Bena groups and I give like a shabas uh I'm giving an optional kaburu and 90% of the time who would show up if it was boys and girls. >> The girls. The girls are the guy are the ones who come up. It's funny, but it's true. I noticed it so much. Um, and I've had opportunities to be teaching in girls schools and teaching in boys schools. It's just a different experience. I find when I teach boys, I it's more fun for me to be honest, but it's a lot of friction. There's a lot of like every time I say something, you know, at least when they're teenagers, it's an argument. It's a fight. They want to they want to put their two cents in there. They don't want to just have the rabbi talk. You know, when I go into the girls schools, they just take out their pens. [laughter] They're just taking notes like any any question, anything the pin drops. No, it depends. They're different girls schools and different I'm I'm generalizing here, but I I did I do find from my personal experience that there's a little bit more of a a natural um it's smoother spirituality, learning, davin, it it almost like makes more sense more naturally. And for us men folk, we have more egos. We have more physical stuff kind of uh >> resistance >> resistance. Again, I'm speaking in general terms. And uh some some people will agree with perspect perspective. I find it it speaks to me that really women they they they don't need to use their every free moment to learn Torah because they're they're tapped in. They're tapped into it. us men folk, if we don't use every female to learn Torah, who knows, you know, what was what we're going to be doing. So the villain and the and the Torah are are kind of binding us back to don't go off the straight path. Come back to Hashem. Come back to Hashem because women folk may in general may not need that to the same extent. If they do it, great, all the more so, but it's it's not uh as absolutely necessary. And so that may be another way of understanding uh why it is that women uh don't have to do this and men do have to do this. But uh anyh who um for those [clears throat] of us who do have the opportunity every morning to wrap fill in uh what is be binding ourselves and physically expressing our love of aes and you know feeling like we're bringing the so many names of God onto our forehead and mish bringing it into our heart and what and for those who aren't wearing fill in you know physically but to know that the name of Hashem is mama there naturally that's also a tremendous thing to just be aware of. Yeah, >> there sort of difference between the women and we now have men actually need to do something physical to fill in whereas I think women tend to have a more natural >> Yeah. Exactly. Exactly. It could be that men need to do stuff to bring that amuna into them whereas it's kind of the natural go-to of holy Jewish uh women nishamas. Yeah. Everything you've said so far for men a man could do by himself. The one thing you mentioned for women giving birth a woman cannot do by herself. >> Ah interesting. >> Yeah. >> What do you say about women that they can do for themselves? >> Well, there's many mitzvah that women specifically have that they can do. The most obvious one that comes to mind is neros is you know shabas candles which is a specific woman mitzvah where they don't need them men folk and uh they can connect their namas on a higher level. I'm sure there are other things too that aren't coming to mind but that's the first thing that comes to mind. We should be pick up the signals either with our fill in antennas or with our natural antennas. pick up the the love of that's always flowing down into the universe and uh learn Torah and we're filling with every day that we get to do these incredible mitzvah and uh I don't know what the fillain song is. I don't know any any really goodwillin songs. So we'll we'll go back to a Torah song to to finish up our night together. Hey, you know what? There's one story that I wanted to say that always happens. The song brings down. I want to end off with one last story. I see I have two minutes. I could pull it off. Um true story. I just read it. Incredible story. There was uh you know loved to wrap fill on the so they go up to an army base. They're going and the army it's like h sorry guys I can't just let a bunch of random came onto the base. We got to get the okay. But he feels bad. These guys came all the way up north. Says, "Listen, I'll tell you the truth. Up over there in that field, my buddies are doing some, you know, training exercises. Go over there. You you you'll find some uh some guys to wrap filling on." So, these two guys, they they come out and then they put up the stand and everyone on their free time. Why not? Free time. They put on their fillin. You see in the army, it gets very everyone gets really into fillin. It's also considered a protection to wear fillin, especially in the army. So people love wearing fill in and everyone's wearing it except one guy. This one guy says, "No, I'm not doing it." I say, "Why? It's something against religion. What's what's holding? What's the big deal? Take one minute. You'll feel good." He says, "No, no, you don't understand. I have my guy." I go to the hotel and there's one guy and he's the only guy who wraps nights filling and the truth is I haven't seen him for a long time. I don't know where my guy is. I'm waiting to wrap fill in with my guy. They look at him, they say. They take out their phone. They show a picture. Is this your guy? He says, "Yeah, that's my guy. How do you know?" The guy starts crying. The kid who he says, "That's my dad. He passed away." >> And that's why you haven't seen him at the kotel wrapping fillain. But I'm doing this mitzvah in honor of my dad. And so he wrapped the fill and they started crying. But if you think about it, that guy, there was no one else in the universe who could have gotten him to where it's filling. Only that guy that that kid, so Hashem took the whole universe to make sure that one year would wrap fill in. So what is that? We should we should know what a privilege it is what it is uh to wear to to to wear and to do all the mitzvah of thanks everybody for coming and um [music and singing] [music] [singing] [music] it's Oh [singing] my [music] god. >> [singing]