Rabbi Kalman Flaks: Sefirat Ha’omer, And the power of the Preparation

[music] [singing] [music] [singing] [music and singing] >> Okay, shalom aleichem. Holy brothers and sisters on this beautiful night. Uh I want to start with a little meditation. We're about to learn Torah. Okay? The girl says, "Every word of Torah is a mitzvah." Talmud Torah connected Kulam. So, we're going to prepare ourselves for this great moment that we're about to do by saying and singing Hineni Muchan u'Muzman l'kayem mitzvat she' shall limud Torah. K'mo she'katuv ba'Torah u'divarta bam b'shivtecha u'vetecha u'velechtecha va'derech. So, now let's sing it. K'vatz. So, we just prepared ourselves to the great mitzvah of learning Torah. And one day, I hope, b'ezrat Hashem, everyone will sing that song before they learn Torah. But in the meantime, that song only leads me to a question. The question is, why is it that the minhag of the vast majority of Klal Yisrael is to sing the Hineni Muchan u'Muzman l'shem yichud prayer dafka to sing that song and not all of the other mitzvahs that we do? There's so many mitzvahs. And yet, for some strange reason, Am Yisrael has only been noheg to sing the Hineni Muchan u'Muzman song, or if you don't sing it, to say the l'shem yichud Kudsha Brikhu, preparing oneself for saying the Sefirat HaOmer. Why is it that only by the mitzvah of Sefirat HaOmer does Am Yisrael say this prayer? That's the question that I want to start off with, and that's going to give us a launchpad to jump into this Sugya of Hineni Muchan u'Muzman. You hear the question? You with me? Here. It's a good question. We should say it before every single mitzvah, before we learn Torah, and before we wear our tzitzit, and before we wear tefillin, and before we give tzedakah, and before we daven everything. Why don't Chabad do it? Because before they say Baruch She'amar, the little pasuk that they say before that, that's their way of That's their Hineni They say that before every mitzvah of the day. Ah, so you do it in the beginning and then it counts like everything. >> Yeah. Okay, good, but it doesn't really answer my question. In other words, why not just do it Why dafka by Sefirat HaOmer do we go out of our way to do this Hineni Muchan u'Muzman and why not for everything? Now, it is important a little history. The truth is, kabbalists, based on the Chidushei HaArizal, are the ones who uh I don't want to say invented, but awoke Am Yisrael of the need to say the l'shem yichud Hineni Muchan u'Muzman incantation preparation. Right? So, for those who are cabbalistically oriented, they will very often say the Hineni Muchan u'Muzman or the l'shem yichud before their prayers. You'll see this a lot by Sefardim, who are more connected to the cabbalistic, uh you know, traditions, and by Chassidim and Chabadnikim amongst those who will prepare themselves before doing certain mitzvahs. You'll see it less by Ashkenazim, by uh Misnagdic Ashkenazim. For For some reason, there are some mitzvahs which even Ashkenazim, even in the ArtScroll of the Ashkenazim, they have l'shem yichud for a few other mitzvahs. All right, where else can you think that they that a lot of people do a l'shem yichud Hineni Muchan u'Muzman kind of preparation? By By Sukkos. By Sukkos, there's a there's a whole preparation that a lot of uh people say before they go into the Sukkah. Um you'll see it often by kiddush, although more Chassidic ly oriented people do it by kiddush. By tefillin, many many people do do a preparation before tefillin or by tallis, by tzitzit, many people do do this. So, it's not And by Baruch She'amar before Pesukei d'Zimra, you also sometimes see that. So, I'm not claiming that it's as exclusive to uh to Sefirat HaOmer. But, you know, I brought three siddurs, Ashkenaz, Sefard, Edot HaMizrach, and all of them in the ArtScroll standardized text, you're going to find a Hineni Muchan u'Muzman, and as the great principle uh we've said many times that Pokeach Ivrim goes see what Am Yisrael does. If Am Yisrael is doing something that we If we're not nevi'im, we're the children of nevi'im. That's what Chazal declares in the Gemara. So, if this is the minhag of Am Yisrael, there must be a reasoning, there must be a deeper idea behind the the re- the reason that dafka by Sefirat HaOmer we go out of our way to do Hineni Muchan u'Muzman. Okay? [snorts] You with me? So, I have a theory. So, here's my theory. It goes like this. In order to understand the Hineni Muchan u'Muzman, we have to go back to the Sefirat HaOmer itself. Okay? Sefirat HaOmer itself. Now, why do we do Sefirat HaOmer? What's that all about? What does the Torah tell us? What is the rationale behind the mitzvah of Sefirat HaOmer? What are we What are we doing there? Anybody know? We're counting the What's that all about? We're counting between the Passover and Shavuot, seven weeks. Yeah, we're Exactly, we are counting between Pesach and Shavuot, but why? Why are we doing that? >> God told us Cuz God told us to. That's That is true. That is good. That's always true. But what What is the reasoning behind Why Why aren't we counting for between Shavuot and Sukkos, and between Sukkos and Purim, or Sukkos and Chanukah? Why are we counting dafka during this time period? So, what's the classical explanation that we, you know, that our morahs taught us when we were in third grade? >> From the barley offering to the wheat offering. Ah, so maybe I don't know. My My morahs weren't that advanced. The The Rav Posner had had great morahs. They were taught They told them pashut p'shat that that we're transforming ourselves from the barley offering of Pesach to the wheat offering of Shavuot to transform ourselves into humans, like the Tanya and all the Chassidic masters teach. But I don't know. When I was a kid, I I heard the explanation based that the Midrash brings down and that the Rambam brings down in Moreh Nevukhim, and that he says, "Shavuot Yom Matan Torah." I'm reading from the Moreh Nevukhim. Shavuot is the day we received the Torah. And I like "Gedula yomo u'yamino u'yamina u'mora rishona lav." We want to make this day of Shavuot greater. K'mishum am team bo an emunah she'b'lev adam she'moneh hayom gam asharot. It's like someone who's waiting and counting down, "When will that day come when we will receive the Torah?" And that's The Midrash says we're reenacting what the Jewish people did. We received We get went free on Pesach, and then we recei- we knew that we were going to receive the Torah on Shavuot. So, every day we were counting up. We're actually I guess we were counting down, but we count up. We're counting down the When will we finally receive the Torah? And in this way we are anticipating and yearning for um receiving the Torah. Okay? That's That's what it's all about. It's days of yearning, of anticipation to receive the Torah. And that's a beautiful explanation. There's just one little problem with that. In the Chumash itself, it doesn't say that. How do I know it doesn't say in the Chumash itself why we're counting? Cuz the Chumash never tells us that we got the Torah on Shavuot. You know that? What are we celebrating on Shavuot? Everybody knows that we get the Torah. So, we stay up all night and eat cheesecake, right? It was a tradition given to Moshe Rabbeinu. Just joking, but everybody knows that we received the Torah, but in the Chumash itself, it doesn't say that. It doesn't say that. What does it say? It says in Vayikra and in other places, "U'sfartem lachem." You should count. "Mimacharat haShabbat." "U'yom ha'bikurim tov u'tenuva." "Sheva shabbatot temimot tihiyenah." It just says you should count. "Vayikra mimacharat haShabbat." And then you're going to bring a new offering, like the rabbi said, right? But it doesn't say why. Ah, comes the Gemara, the Torah She'b'al Peh, tells us we received the Torah on Shavuot, and finds all sorts of allusions how we know we received the Torah on Shavuot. But why doesn't the Torah itself tell us this fundamental element of Shavuos? We know why why why why Pesach happened. Why not tell us what happened on Shavuos? Good question, right? If if just for that question alone it's worth I think coming to this year. So there's many beautiful answers and then that that deserves a sheer in and of itself. But one of the answers which I heard which makes a lot of sense to me is that you see something went wrong after we received the Torah. What went wrong? The the egg yolk. The egg yolk. Right? In Yom the Yom we read about in the parsha. We messed up. We got the Torah in Shavuos. All was great but just a couple of days later, 40 days later, 17th of Tammuz, the Jewish people messed up and we did the chet ha'egel. Okay, then we did teshuvah and Moshe davened for us and we got the Torah back in Yom Kippur to atone for all of our sins. And that's great. So we should celebrate Yom Kippur or Purim. What are we celebrating Shavuos for? So because at the end of the day we received the Torah, we Yeah we got the Torah in Shavuos but the Torah doesn't say that. It lets the rabbis fill us in on that because it's almost embarrassed to say that we received the Torah on Shavuos because we messed up. We sinned. We we kind of ruined it by our our our chataim. And that's why Shavuos it doesn't explicitly say in the written Torah that we received the Torah. You're with me so far? But like every good answer brings another question. So if that's true then what are we celebrating in the first place? If the whole thing we got we received the Torah is and then we sinned. Then we got it back in Yom Kippur. So let's, you know, so let's celebrate when we won the war, Yom Kippur. Why are we celebrating Shavuos in the first place? Yeah, it's a good question, yeah? Wasn't it the festival of the harvest? >> Okay, so it's the festival of harvest. Very nice. I don't know. To me that doesn't do it. That doesn't do it for me. Okay, it could be that the farmers, you know, farmers are very excited about this. It doesn't do it for me. So I I'll tell you what I think is a good theory. Yes, we messed up. But we had 49 days of journeying, of yearning to receive that Torah and working on ourselves and preparing our vessels to receive the Torah on Shavuos. And that is not worthless. That became part of our DNA, our spiritual DNA, forever. And as we've said many times, it's not just what happened then but b'yamim haheim u'vazman hazeh. To this day every single night of the Omer we're supposed to be yearning and preparing ourselves and learning a little bit more Torah and hopefully in a I'm going to give ourselves a practical eitzah what of how we can prepare for receiving the Torah by the end of this year. But the but that act of going towards of the journey towards is not worthless. In fact, maybe that's the whole essence of Sefiras Omer to remind us that it's not just the end zone, it's not just winning the championship, it's not standing up there with a gold medal, it's the journey towards whether we win or lose. Obviously we'd like to win. But that's the essence of Sefiras Omer. You with me? I'm sorry, that's the essence of Sefiras Omer, that's the essence of Shavuos. And if my theory is correct, so now doesn't it make perfect hashgacha pratit that of all mitzvos in the Torah, what's the one mitzvah where where we go out of our way to do a little extra preparation, to sing a little bit, to prepare ourselves, to say the shem yichud? And and um real Since the essence of Sefiras Omer is the preparation, we want to prepare ourselves for the preparation. Really we're preparing ourselves for the preparation for the preparation. Cuz the bracha is also a preparation. That's why chazal enacted a bracha to prepare us for a mitzvah. And the Omer itself we said is a preparation for receiving the Torah. And so the shem yichud is a preparation. And right now I'm I'm preparing us to prepare to prepare to prepare. Pretty cool, no? And on the way Okay, yeah you get the idea. And that's great. And because all of It's [clears throat] perpetual prep I would've been a cool name. Next year I'll have to use that name. But because that is the essence of life. Indeed, this is all of life. It's one big act of preparation. We're learning Pirkei Avos during this time period, right? And the Pirkei Avos stresses over and over this world is dome pruz dor. This world is a preparation. It's an antechamber. It's just a journey towards as the Mesillas Yesharim starts his sefer. So that means this world is is useless and not a big deal? Because in the end it's all about Olam Haba, right? The The Chovos Halevavos talks about this world because the journey towards has value. The journey towards has The journey towards that's where we can actually affect things. Once the journey's over, once the game's over, it's over. Heard a beautiful explanation of the Chofetz Chaim. Why didn't Why isn't the Mashiach come yet? What's he waiting for? We've so many years. What's what's going on? So perhaps one suggestion the Chofetz Chaim said is Hashem's giving us one last chance to act, to be a part of it, to bring to have an active role in bringing the Mashiach. Once it's here, the game game over. So of course we want the Mashiach. We want all those people who were killed in all these wars and their families to be reunited with them. We want world peace. But we also recognize that we want to have a part of that journey of bringing the Mashiach. So it's a pre The gift so to speak of our Mashiach not yet being here is that we have a role in bringing the Mashiach. Okay. Anyway, so let's just get back. So really what we're saying is that the shem yichud is a preparation for Sefiras Omer which is a preparation for receiving the Torah. Good. Now just stepping back a little bit just to be completely honest, there are those there were rabbis who um you know, weren't so into the the shem yichud and hinni muchan u'mezuman. Just throwing that out there for the sake of honesty. The biggest rabbi who was not into it was the Nodah b'Yehudah. The Nodah b'Yehudah had two main problems with the nusach we say of the shem yichud. The first one issue is kind of a technical issue. In the hinni muchan u'mezuman we say k'moshe katuv ba'Torah. As it is written in the Torah. U'sfartem lachem mimacharat ha'Shabbat. But he says, wait a second. What we do today when we count, is that what's written in the Torah? Actually, according to most rishonim, not. According to the Rambam, yes, when you count today you're fulfilling a biblical mitzvah. But according to Tosafos and the majority of rishonim, we are doing a rabbinical mitzvah. Okay? We only when we had a korban Omer and a Beit HaMikdash which the Omer is a korban, then we have a mitzvah of counting the Omer. Now we have a reminder according to >> to the Torah or is it probably with the mitzvah assei where Maybe that's the same but it's the same that it says k'moshe katuv ba'Torah hinni muchan u'mezuman. Ah, very good. Good. It's not a mitzvah assei mid'oraita. It's not a mitzvah assei d'oraita and therefore to say k'moshe katuv ba'Torah the Nodah b'Yehudah felt was problematic. But Rav Zalman Auerbach and others like Rav Elyashiv say first of all you could change the nusach a little bit. Instead of saying k'moshe katuv ba'Torah, you could say k'moshe katuv. It's an alluded to in the Torah. It's not actually a biblical mitzvah but it's alluded to in the Torah. And others say, listen, you don't have to take everything so literally. It's written in the Torah the mitzvah of Omer and from that the rabbis, you know, derived this rabbinical mitzvah. The main thing is that we're preparing ourselves to do this mitzvah. And by the way, the Rambam holds that it is a mitzvah d'oraita even today. Okay, so to me that's a little bit of a techni- It's a technicality. You could you could change the nusach a little bit and there are those who did. But to me that doesn't quite uh that to me that's not such a big deal. Um I think there are others, probably including the Nodah b'Yehudah, who were very queasy about this kabbalistic concept of unifying Hashem. Because what does it mean yichud? Kabbalistically speaking, God elements of Hashem kavyachol were spread throughout the world when he created the world. And there were shattered vessels and it went all throughout the world. And then how do we unify God? By doing mitzvos. That's called the yichud. We're we're bringing God together. We're making God one again. Okay? Now obviously that's a parable. And I'm not a kabbalist so I can't explain to you exactly what that means. But there were those who don't under- didn't understand this kabbalistic concept, didn't connect to it and therefore were against. There are rabbis who went in the derech of Nodah b'Yehudah and didn't say this. What what would they oppose? They would oppose the concept of saying I'm being meyached Hashem. I'm unifying God. As the God is one. Shema Yisrael Hashem Elokeinu Hashem Echad. I'm not unifying God, he's already one. So they didn't like that. Nonetheless, the custom that has been spread throughout rove food to Israel, we're not afraid of saying a shem yichud. We don't mean it literally. We trust the Kabbalists and the Chassidim that they know what they're talking about, that kav yashar and somewhere we're bringing Hashem together, maybe not literally, maybe just in our minds we're we're making it like there's one more more oneness of Hashem in the world. But, as we say, "In that day Hashem will be one and his name will be one." Meaning he's not one. I mean he is one, but the world doesn't yet recognize his oneness. And every mitzvah we do, we're bringing more of the consciousness of the oneness of Hashem into the world. So so so to me that also is not a big factor. And at the end of the day, I'm a pashet Yid. I I look what Am Yisrael has taken upon themselves. Ashkenazi, Sefard, Nusach Nusach Eidot HaMizrach. I don't know what the Yemenites do cuz the Yemenites are are big Rambam people, so I'm not sure. Maybe in their siddur they they skip the Leshem Yichud. But, the vast majority of Am Yisrael does the Leshem Yichud Kutzah Berichu, and that's become the minhag of Am Yisrael. And by the way, the Kabbalists go at length to talk about the importance of saying a Leshem Yichud. In fact, in Sefer Or L'Shamayim, it's brought down that basically, if you sinned, it can soil your mitzvahs with evil negative energy. Okay? Have you Why is it that great rabbis, they give you a bracha, and boom, it happens? And simple people like you and me, it doesn't work like that necessarily. Because we we not you, but I soil my mouth by doing you know, doing this sin and doing that sin, overeating, and speaking badly. And so my mouth is not a vessel to properly achieve the rectifications. Yes? But a Leshem Yichud can nullify some of those evil energies, that evil spirits, and allow me to connect to the mitzvah in a greater way. So I think that's beautiful. And I trust the Kabbalists that they know what they're talking about. And I think it's a wonderful thing to do a Leshem Yichud before you do a mitzvah. By the way, uh the the Kabbalists go at length, for example, the Chida, someone who we've quoted many times, Rav Chaim Yosef David Azulai. He has a sefer, I have it in my house. And the Chida writes, before everything you do, basically, every mitzvah, you should prepare yourself. And he has a whole sefer reminding us even mitzvahs d'Rabbanan, even minhagim, where he he literally you're supposed to read the sefer in the morning, and and today I intend to wear a kippah. And today I intend to walk four amos to fulfill the mitzvah of living in Eretz Yisrael. And today I mamesh, every action I do, he to to verbalize to think and verbalize, why am I doing this? And of And if anyone, you know, has done this or or tries it, you'll see, you just you're much more connected to the mitzvahs that we're doing. Obviously, you have to find a way to do it in a not overbearing neurotic way. If it's going to drive you crazy, okay. But but but for the most part, if we were to prepare and actually verbalize what we're doing, uh you know, it would be amazing thing. If we if we follow the advice of the holy Chida. Okay, you can take the exemption we said before, do it for the first mitzvah and it counts for everything. Fine, but if a person can, then that's a wonderful thing. In fact, writes the Tzetzel HaKatan. That is You guys know about the the Tzetzel HaKatan? So I I guess you're not yet true Chassidim. Uh the Noam Elimelech, the Rebbe Reb Melech, who uh I'm a little connected to cuz my great ancestor, the Mor v'Shemesh, was a a Chassid of the Noam Elimelech. And the Noam Elimelech writes a little letter to his Chassidim. And they are supposed to say this every day. So if you go to not just uh students Noam Elimelech, the third generation from the Baal Shem Tov, many Chassidim say this every day. The Tzetzel HaKatan. And the Tzetzel HaKatan, I I I brought it down in English. He writes, "Whenever you perform any deed, whether Torah study or prayer or positive commandments, you should familiarize yourself, rise yourself with the following words and make it a habit to recite them. Harei'ni Oseh Zo L'Shem Yichud Kutzah Berichu u'Shchintei L'Asot Nachat Ruach L'Yotzer Yisbarach Sh'mo. I am hereby doing this in order unify the Holy One, blessed be he, and the Sh'chinah to give delight to the blessed creator. You should say this regularly and with great feeling and from the depth of your heart. And after a while, you will feel a great awakening and a spiritual inspiration from saying this." Okay? So Chassidim stress the importance of before any mitzvah Before eating an apple. Ah. Exactly. And And what Aryeh Leib said is my next point. I would say not just by obvious mitzvahs, even in the in the klipah noigah, in the middle ground things, like eating an apple. All the more so we should say a Leshem Yichud. Because now I'm going to take this act, which just would have been an animalistic act, and now I'm going to eat this apple to give me koach so I can do more mitzvahs, to learn more Torah, to be more happy. So all the more so when I eat an apple or when I get on the treadmill, say "Harei'ni L'Shem Yichud Kutzah Berichu to fulfill the mitzvah of u'shmartem u'natzeretem of keeping my body you know, strong." As R' Nachman said, Yachad Torah im Derech Eretz. Learning Torah and Derech Eretz, usually people translate it as work. Is you should combine them. But says the It'll come back to me. Yaakov Emden, you know Yaakov Emden? Derech Eretz is exercise. He writes, "And it's proven that those who exercise, less diseases come upon them. And those who don't exercise, not as much." So Derech Eretz is getting good exercise, says R' Yaakov Emden and the Rambam. Okay, anyways. So yeah, but before I I play sports and before I go on my scooter and to get to where anything is, before I go shopping, I should say a Leshem Yichud Kutzah Berichu. And certainly before I go to the mikvah, I put up a little Leshem Yichud thing by my local mikvah. Put up a sticky thing. It was up there for like six months. I have to re-put it up. Anyways, mikvah's all about preparing, but you need to prepare you to prepare for you need to prepare to prepare. That's That's the theme of today's shiur. I want to demonstrate this with a few more examples, hopefully practical examples that we can bring into our avodas Hashem in this uh beautiful season. Okay. Uh the Rambam writes in Hilchos Beis HaMikdash, Hadlakas Neiros Ksheirah b'Zarim. Lighting of the candles in the Beis HaMikdash, even a zar, even a non-kohen, can do it. Aval Ha'atamas HaNeiros Chayav Lihiyot b'Kohen. But, the preparation of the candle, only the kohen can do. Cuz that's a mitzvah. So we see the great principle that the Sfas Emes brings down. I'll show you how he gets the his proof, that the preparation for the mitzvah sometimes is even greater than the mitzvah itself. Okay? Which is good makes makes us menfolk feel good cuz women like the candles on Shabbos, but the men are supposed to prepare the candles for the women. So maybe the preparation is even greater than the mitzvah itself. At least in the Beis HaMikdash. Pretty wild, right? I won't tell my wife she's between you and me. Okay? Now, I'll give you now a few more examples. Okay? So by Sukkos, the Sukkos, we have this principle that u'lkachtem lachem b'yom ha'rishon you should take on the first day your lulav. Okay? First day, we take the lulav on the which day of of Tishrei? 15th day. Now, the first day of sins. What do you mean? Well, we got atonement from Yom Kippur. And then we have four days before between Yom Kippur and Sukkos. But you're not going to sin during those four days. Because what are you doing during those four days? You're preparing. You're preparing for the mitzvah. And in that way, says the Sfas Emes, we see that the four days of preparing for the mitzvah, then no sins. Sukkos itself, you might sin. So you see the preparation for the mitzvah in some ways is even higher than the mitzvah itself. Now, this isn't pashet. I'll give you an example where of where this is not necessarily true. By sukkah itself, is there a mitzvah to build a sukkah or to dwell in the sukkah? To dwell. Yes, but actually, the halacha is like you said, because in the in the Bavli, we pasken that there's no mitzvah to build a sukkah. But it's interesting, in the Yerushalmi, it says there is a bracha on building the sukkah. From the Yerushalmi's perspective, the the process of the hachana towards building the sukkah itself is actually a mitzvah in of itself. So you see that this is an argument. We have this by milah, the hachana for the milah, can I break Shabbos for the hachana? And this is a a sugya in halacha that comes up in many many different aspects. Okay? Let's Let's give some more practical examples of where we can bring this into our lives. Um shul. You're going to go You're going to go Maariv. Doesn't look like we're going to get a minyan tonight. So, you have to decide where you're going to B'ezrat Hashem, but where you're going to go? So, you have two options. You can either go to the shul next door, okay? Or you could walk 15 more minutes to a different shul. All things being equal, you have nothing else to do with your time, doesn't If no other factors, where should you go? Schar mitzvah. Ah, exactly. So, the Gemara in Sukkot tells us the story. Kibu schar me'al manna d'i al manna d'i beknishta bishvil vuta. There's a woman who had a Beit Knesset in her community. Kol yoma hava assei umatal bemidrash d'Rabbi Yochanan, but she would go all day and and and davening and learn davening by the shul of of Yochanan. Amar lei, "Biti, this is my daughter. Lo Beit Knesset bishvil vuta? You don't have a shul by your area? You're schlepping all the way here." She was an elderly lady. Amar lei, "Rebbi, v'lo schar tzi'osai li?" You want to take away my schar tzi'os? You want to get You want to take my the the reward I get by the journey? And if there's all things equal, I should walk to the farther shul. I shouldn't go to the the closer shul. Because it's not just about davening, it's about the journey towards the shul. Isn't that beautiful? And I wonder if in fact this rabbinical idea is based on the biblical concept of aliyah l'regel, right? Because I'm just starting giving that tour, and you see even from the City of David to get up the to the Kotel and to get up to the Har Habayit, it's quite a schlep. I mean, you're taking It's not It's not easy. You know, some people are are sweating by the end of my tour. Okay, I talk a lot in between, but still It's It's It's It's It's not easy. Imagine walking from Safed to Yerushalayim. Sukkot, Pesach, Shavuot is back and up. Doesn't the Torah think we have better things to do with our time and you know, have some wine and and and and and meat in Yerushalayim? No, but that's the that's the point. It's the journey. It's the process of getting there. Because the process and the journey is extremely valuable. As fast as I can say, it's even more valuable in Yiddishkeit. I remember when I was a kid, me and my brother I used to take my brother um Sammy, and we would walk often together uh to Landau's in uh in Brooklyn for Maariv. Almost every night I would walk to Mincha Maariv by Landau's in the summer months. And I tell you, I don't remember my kavana during those Mincha Maarivs. I don't remember much what was going through my heads, but I very much still remember the sweet conversation and the and the the connection and the bonding between me and my brother. It's that journey towards that at times is even more valuable than the thing itself. I sometimes think of the Kotel like that. I give I do a lot of tours at the Kotel. And in my opinion, that's what the Kotel was, and maybe that's what the Kotel still is. It's not Har Habayit. Har Habayit is a destination. Mashiach is a destination. Har Habayit is the holiest place. The Kotel is our journey. We weren't allowed to go to Har Habayit, so it was the closest we can get. >> [clears throat] >> And even in Temple times, 2,000 years ago, you would go down the Kotel to get up to the Temple Mount. So, what's the value of the Kotel? The Kotel is that journey. The Kotel is the journey towards. And that's our our our Kol Yisrael's journey towards. A few more places where we can um insert this into our Avodat Hashem. Uh one of the most obvious is in tefillah. Okay? The famous Gemara in Berachot tells us chasidim rishonim, the early righteous ones, how you show in They would wait. How long would they wait before they prayed? Sha'ah achat. An hour. They wouldn't just jump in and say They would mamash wait there and meditate for an hour. I don't know what they doing. Breathing exercises? Were they singing Carlebach niggunim? I don't know. They were preparing themselves. They would prepare for an hour before, and they would daven for an hour, and they would zone out, kind of take it back with them for an hour. And the Gemara asked, "Then How do they have time to learn? How do they have time to work? I mean, you're you're meditating all day." And the Gemara says, in Yerushalmi, "Hashem blessed them. He blessed their work. It took real fast. He blessed their their their Torah." Because they understood the value of the journey. That it's not about doing happy not mitzvah and happy not mitzvah, and it's about appreciating the journey towards the mitzvah and recognizing that that is uh super valuable in of itself, which is a message that our generation, I think more than any other generation, really needs to hear a lot. Because we're a generation where we're surrounded by results. We're hearing how this guy made that amount of money, and this guy did that. This [clears throat] guy is you know, I even as a rabbi, I sometimes I can't believe that rabbi has 14 shiurim in one day. How did he produce so much? You know, and I'm still here clicking away at the computer trying to you know, get one one shiur down. You know, I don't How did they How did they do it? And and and so, we're we want to get things done fast. And I'll do a quick, you know, YouTube video here, and I'll do a thing there, and I'll do a you know, and everything we want to get fast results. You know, an AI will enter this and and there's value in that. And you know, and we're we're super programmed to do that cuz we're Jewish, and we're living in Israel, and we are the most like productive people in the world. Our brains are hardwired to just get stuff done. Okay? But with all of that, so often we forget to enjoy the journey and the process, and we're so busy getting stuff done that we're knocking people off the road while we're scooting towards our mitzvahs, you know? And we're not enjoying the process itself. And um you know, I I I remember learning about this from Tal Ben-Shahar. Tal Ben-Shahar was a professor, probably still is a professor, at uh Harvard. And he gives a happiness course. And uh Tal Ben-Shahar is also an Israeli, and when he was in high school, he was an excellent squash player. So, from age 14 till 17, he was training all of his free time to squash to become the Junior Olympic uh champion. And eventually, he won. And he uh he got the gold in the Junior Olympics. He celebrated, and then he said that night was the worst night of his life. Why? What was so bad? He achieved it, and then he got down to the Cuz it's like, now what? Yeah. I got to that high. I accomplished everything I need to accomplish. I don't know what else to do with my life. Now, what do we do? It's right? I don't know if anyone ever experienced that. We're just like, Okay. I don't know if I've experienced it because I haven't accomplished too much, but halavai. But um But so what So, what do we do? So, we not try to accomplish goals? So, says uh Victor Frankl, um that the the game of life is setting realistic goals that are worth journeying towards. But the goal is not to achieve the goal. The goal is to constantly be journeying towards authentic good goals, and then enjoying that process. And then when we B'ezrat Hashem achieve our goals, set new goals. And if we don't accomplish the goals, that's okay. Get up and start again. It is about the journey. Okay? Now, that's true in davening, that's true in learning. So often in learning, we live in a generation where Okay. I love Daf Yomi. I think Daf Yomi is a wonderful thing. I B'ezrat Hashem would love to learn and teach Daf Yomi one day when I have time. But sometimes as we live in a generation where the goal is not to learn the Gemara. The goal is not to learn the The goal is to get through it. Yeah, that's that's just And that's and that's good. There's value in that. Just gets you going, and you know, hopefully it will inspire you to learn more and and one day to learn it in depth. And there's just value in in hearing these concepts. But ultimately, the goal is not just to check it off my list. Oh, I learned I learned a daf. I heard it. I heard it. The goal is to understand it. The goal is to enjoy the journey of the learning. It's not important if I finish the Talmud or or make a siyum not. It's important that every step of the Torah that I'm learning, I understand it, I ask questions, I'm trying my best to enjoy that process. In my opinion. It's not about finishing shots 20 times. It's about getting shots to penetrate our consciousness. Okay? Told, that's my spiel on on the journey towards. I want to just one final segment of this uh little sheer and apply it to our current time because at the end of the day it's Bayazier. Okay? Or Gimel or already. And it's a special time that we're in and I have to at least connect this Torah to the time period that we're we're we're we're in. We are in the month of Iyar. Erev Yom Hazikaron, Erev Erev Yom Ha'atzmaut. Chodesh Iyar is the month of the journey. The the month of the journeying. What do I mean by that? Okay? So, what's the first thing in the Chumash that happens in Chodesh Iyar? Rosh Chodesh Iyar. In the beginning of Sefer Bamidbar, Hashem tells the Jewish people, "I'm doing a census. I'm counting you." Tzvi, Moishe, Chanala, Yankela, he counts the Jewish people. When? Rosh Chodesh Iyar. Explains Chassidus, Hakadosh Baruch Hu is telling us he loves us. You count. Every single Jew makes a difference. He wants to make sure nobody got lost in the desert at the ice cream store in the desert, you know? Every Jew counts. That's Rosh Chodesh Iyar. Chodesh Iyar is the only month where every single day we're counting. Why are we counting every day? Cuz it's Sefirat HaOmer. We got a little bit on the month before, a little bit on the month afterwards, and Iyar, the entire month is counting. Every day counts. Because you said, "Oh, I missed a day." It doesn't matter. Every day of Sefirat HaOmer is a mitzvah in of itself, according to most Rishonim, and that's how the Shulchan Aruch paskens. So, even if you missed yesterday, you count today. Not with the bracha, but you count. Every day has value. What happens in Chodesh Iyar? Pesach Sheini. What's Pesach Sheini? Pesach Sheini is when the Jewish people realize they messed up. They were impure. They're not able to bring the Pesach. But they say, "Even though we messed up, why shouldn't we count? Lama nigara?" We still want to get connected to Hashem. We still want to bring the Korban Pesach. What does Moshe tell Moshe ask Hashem? What does Hashem tell him in Chodesh Iyar? Tes of Iyar? It counts. You want to connect to me? I'm going to create a whole new holiday so that you can connect to Hakadosh Baruch Hu called Pesach Sheini. It's also the Yahrtzeit of Rabbi Meir Baal HaNess, who said that even if you sinned, "Banim atem laHashem Eloheichem." You're still children of Hakadosh Baruch Hu. You may have messed up, but you're still I you still count. I still love you. When did the Jewish people start building the first Beit HaMikdash? Step by step, Chodesh Iyar. When we start building the second Beit HaMikdash? Iyar. Iyar. Ezra, chapter 3, verse 8. Chodesh Ziv. That's when these people, some of them were intermarried. Some of them were maybe not not the frummest Yidden, but they yearned to connect to Hakadosh Baruch Hu and they start rebuilding the second Beit HaMikdash step by step. They want to rebuild and reconnect to Hakadosh Baruch Hu in Chodesh Iyar. Unbelievable. This is the month where Hakadosh Baruch Hu tells us everything you do matters, everything counts. And this is the month where we stop worrying about only what's the goal, but what can I do today? What step can I do in this journey, in this process of journeying towards perfection. I'm not going to be perfect. I'm imperfect. But valuing the journey towards towards perfection. Right? And there were I just one Yeah, what's your question? Okay, I I I like your theme of journeying and re-journeying. And counting the Omer to me is uh it's about the uh renewable journey through our life of taking um our our emotions and structuring and restructuring and reframing them to lead us to the point of Malchut where we're always reconnecting with Hashem. Beautiful. Beautiful. Bezrat Hashem. But when you when you say that, some some uh prominent Jewish thinkers are saying that's the the uh unifying of Hashem and maybe and and therefore it's not kosher. I have looked at >> So, I I need to be more clear. They're not looking down at the Omer. Everybody's into the mitzvah of Sefirat HaOmer. They're into the extra incantation that the Kabbalists brought to Am Yisrael of "Hinei Which as you've obviously seen, I'm all for cuz that's the whole theme of this sheer, right? But that's not a mitzvah. That's not a halacha. It doesn't say in the Shulchan Aruch "Thou must say uh Hinei ni muchanim u mezuman." And that's not the written in the Gemara. That's a Kabbalistic idea, which most of Am Yisrael has taken upon themselves, but the Nodah b'Yehudah has the right to say, "I'm not a Kabbalist. I'm not into that. I don't know what it means to unify God, but I'm on your team. I'm all into it, okay?" But I just want to I I before we we do that, I just want to wrap up with one last thought in in you know, specifically connecting this to to our time period. So, you know, we're Erev Yom Hazikaron and Erev Yom Ha'atzmaut. And for me, these are holy days. There's different approaches on Am Yisrael, but for me, this is a very holy day. Yom Hazikaron is the day when there's a lot of brokenness, but we don't focus on To me, it's not a day to cry for the sake of crying and saying, "Oh, what a terrible ter It's a day to count the beautiful neshamos that gave so much to Am Yisrael and to be inspired by them to say, "Look how they had a role in the building of Am Yisrael, in building Am Yisrael, in bringing Am Yisrael back to Am to to Eretz Yisrael, in fighting for our land, in bringing this flesh back to the soul of the Jewish people." And Yom Ha'atzmaut, there are those who get caught up on this flaw of the medina and this thing is not perfect yet enough and this is and all and all that. My way of understanding it is dayenu. It's not perfect, but but look what Hakadosh Baruch Hu has done for us. Look at the miracles that Hakadosh Baruch Hu has done for us in bringing Am Yisrael back to Eretz Yisrael, in the kibbutz galuyot, in the flourishing of Torah, and in giving Am Yisrael the chance to fulfill the great mitzvah of yishuv Eretz Yisrael on individual and on a national level. And it's a day of asking ourselves, not just of on the one hand recognizing and appreciating the gifts that Hakadosh Baruch Hu has given us and saying "Hallel." But at the same time, challenging ourselves and saying, "What can I do in my in this journey of Am Yisrael towards the Mashiach? How can I contribute? What what's my role? What's my little role in order to help bring us towards that perfection? We're not perfect. We're living in a world of imperfection, but what can I do to to to journey and step by step bring us towards that process? So, just to sum up, "Hinei ni muchanim u mezuman" is all about the journey, the process towards Sefirat HaOmer, which is all about the journey. I had to give myself a practical eitzah about, "How do I use the next couple of days of Sefirat HaOmer and actually make it um and make my avodas Hashem more real?" I would tell myself, "Work on the l'shem yichud. Work on the the the the the preparation for the mitzvah. Not just doing the mitzvah, but when I'm walking to shul, when I'm about to put on my tallis, when I'm about to put on my tzitzis, when I'm about when I'm shopping in the in in the store for Shabbos Kodesh, when I'm my preparation for Shabbos, you know, I I I not just the Shabbos itself, but but am I creating with my yearning, am I creating the vessels? How's how what does my Erev Shabbos look like? Am I take Am I just jumping into shul a minute before davening, or am I getting there early? And am I am I talking to Hashem and yearning for that davening? Am I yearning for that Shabbos Kodesh? Am I Am I doing teshuvah Erev Shabbos? Am I Am I physically preparing? In in all of my different avodas, how how does my preparation towards look? And let's use these special days of Sefirat HaOmer as special times to focus on the hachanah for the mitzvah. So, bezrat Hashem. Yasher koach to all of Am Yisrael. Yasher koach to all of uh post them in the Hilchos Yibaneh. Bezrat Hashem she nizkeh l'vanei Beit HaMikdash. Bezrat Hashem. Sheyibaneh Beit HaMikdash Sheyibaneh Beit [singing] HaMikdash >> [singing] >> The big day I am a man >> [singing] >> of the big day [singing] I am a man of the big day I am a man of the big I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I [singing] I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I Shkoyach. >> [music] [singing] [music] [singing] [music and singing] >> Ooh, na na na na.