Rabbi Daniel Feldman - Repentance from a place of Love

[Music] lecture is in that dedicated for the refresh claim of the complete roof who shall Aimie for hearty Kassadin whose name is time Rea Ben Rifkin thank you very much for by Poston it's really a pleasure to be here tonight just like to start off by asking you two questions at the same time what would you say is the easiest Mitzvah the Torah and what would you say is the hardest Mitzvah the Torah we have any guesses for either one what do you think is the easiest move so what's the artist miss it's the easiest command that we have what's the hardest or I'll give you a hint to suggest to be happy to be happy okay I guess depends who you are ah very good so you could on that they are they're the same one and does that help so sorry parents depends who you are again so the answer is the same to both of them and you might be able to guess because it's in the title of our topic it's true ver the commandment of repentance of change of atonement that has aspects that make it the easiest commandment that we have and also the hardest that was an observation that was actually made by the greater of cook ramyun Scott Cohen cooked the first chief rabbi of the Land of Israel the modern Land of Israel whose yard site was this past week a third of ello where he wrote in a classic work about the concept and the themes of chuhwa he wrote that it's both it is the easiest and it's the hardest what makes it the easiest it's the easiest because it doesn't have to cost us any money or take any time or involve any actual physical efforts and the Talmud tells us that it can be accomplished instantaneously and invisibly so for example there's a strange kind of hypothetical one of those cases that we have only to prove a point it's not the kind of thing that happens too often in real life well let's say the Talmud says let's say somebody wants to marry a woman conditional he says I marry you on condition that X Y and Z's truth so if he says I'm marrying you on condition this guy is blue okay she says I marry you on condition this guy is green it's no good what if the person says I am marrying you on condition that I am completely righteous and what we call it Sadiq Gummer and completely righteous does that work and let's make it a little bit more interesting let's say this person is known to be a total jerk let's say it's not much of a question what the character of this individual is he's well known to be a very low individual and this person says I am marrying this woman on the condition that I am completely righteous is that a valid marriage Talmud says maybe could be could be how come it could be I mean everyone knows that he's not exactly righteous it's clear he's got a reputation says the Tom wood maybe maybe he had a thought of repentance and that would have done that would have flipped them around at that one second thought so from that perspective it's the easiest commandment that we had we done in a second without leaving your chair without spending any money or doing any physical labor that's up there as far as the easiest commandments but there's something about it that pushes it to the complete opposite end of the spectrum in a few weeks we're gonna have russia shana and Kippur and circus and there are a lot of obligations that are associated we know we're supposed to hear the shofar blown we're supposed to fast on Yom Kippur we're supposed to take a little of an asteroid and sit in the sukkah and we're supposed to do chuva we're supposed to repent all of those are crucial obligations of the festival's so let's say a month and a half from now after it's all over I come up to you and I say so did you hear the show for a Russia shot you'll probably be able to answer me probably you did maybe didn't maybe you couldn't get the show but you'll probably know the answer I'll say did you fast on Yom Kippur did you sit in the sukkah did you take a rule of an Esther oh you'll be able to tell me yes or no but the most important commandment to the season if I ask you a couple of weeks from now after Rosh Hashanah Yom Kippur and circus is over I said so tell me did you do chuhwa did you repent what kind of answer can I expect yep done checked off probably not right anyone come out of circus saying okay I know I got that one I'll probably say I hope I tried I went to the synagogue on Yom Kippur I fasted I prayed got cried a little bit I hope I don't know we're never going to be confident we're never gonna really be sure that we've done this Mitzvah and that makes it different than everything else I know I took a little of or I know I didn't get around to it I know I heard the chauffeur or didn't but this one Mitzvah may be different from all the others I hope so I tried I don't know so that's already a little frustrating consuming right doesn't last by definition humans because we change and our circumstance has changed so that's yeah that's actually a great question and that opens up another topic you'll have to invite me back next year to talk about that topic because that you're bringing up another element which is definitely worth discussion there is an inherent paradox because on the one hand we can't do what you might call today a half chuga say okay I'm coming into the season you know improve things a little bit but I still want to hold on to a lot of things that I don't want to change so quickly but on the other hand none of us is perfect not today tomorrow or next month so that poses a fundamental question so if none of us come out of the season perfect and chufa requires us to really be ready to change everything so then where does that land us that's a fair question that's something deserve its own topic but just on a basic level we say we hope we did we think we tried I don't know in that sense it is uniquely frustrated and that differentiates it from almost all the other Commandments that we have well we can look at something we can say all right I know I did this I gave MOT son ASA I know what that's like fine it's done Coover I hope I'm about to make it even more frustrating not gonna solve the problems right away the Talmud has a statement which brings this discussion to a different level and it makes it on the one hand very beautiful and lofty and inspiring and on the other hand even more frustrating the Talmud has the following discussion it's a contradiction between two statements okay that happens all the time every page of the Talmud it doesn't bother us in the kind addition between two statements that's usually what we call my focus an argument right we know to juice three opinions not surprising to have two contradictory statements the problem is in this case they're both attributed to the same author so Talmud has to figure out how could both statements be said by the same person the first statement is Godot la chufa chuva is amazing shuva is incredible because you know what accomplishes it can take someone's intentional misdeeds somebody does something wrong on purpose what we call amazing in Hebrew and through repentance we treat it like it was an accident we treat it like it was a show gig it was something inadvertently it's pretty good that's quite an accomplishment but there's another statement says the talmud attributed to the same author of the Olson on Godot virtue of all truth is amazing so far not a contradiction yeah what's so amazing about it because through the power of chula your intentional misdeeds these amazing transit transit aggressions through chuva they become Julio's what does that mean they become sources of merits they become points in your favor so the first statement says that chuhwa has the ability to change our misdeeds into accidents into mistakes that aren't held against us and the second statement goes even further not only is it not held against us but it's something that will actually act in our favor it's something that's actually counted as a positive so which is it well take either one they're both pretty good but which is it so says the Talmud well there are two types there's two types of repent two types of children the first is called Chava mayera and we're gonna have to translate these in a vague sense because they're vague concepts as we'll see but the first is chuhwa that is motivated by yura yura we translate sometimes as fear maybe that's not a great translation maybe reverence would be a greater translation but a sense of fear or reverence of God motivates repentance that's what the first statement is talking about that gives us a clean slate but the Chuba that's even better than that the one that pushes us to a stage where our transgressions our misdeeds are counted not only as nothing but as positives what's that that's called chuhwa may Ava what does chuhwa may have a repentance that comes out of love that's fantastic that's a great deal so sign me up for the second but how does it work does that have was that what I do I just fill out the form when you come to shul in your Kippur so they'll say okay the same way they ask for your donations in the forum and your seats and all those questions so they also check off here okay do you want you for me here I'd you want you for me what kind of repentance do you want it's not really very clear these are very inspiring ideas but what does it mean what does it mean practically now the truth is to take a step back we mentioned that chuva is frustrating because we don't know what to do or when we've done it but in the classic literature there is a description and there is this notion that there's a essentially a three-step process right that we confess what we've done wrong and we regret what we've done wrong at stage two and we accept on behalf of the future that we're not going to do that again so we do have somewhat of a delineating process but here we're totally out to sea it was hard enough when we're talking about the basic concept of repentance if you're gonna try to know did you ever do it to just succeed that was hard enough now you're telling me that there's this pie in the sky vision that you can really flip everything around through some type of a majestic chuhwa how do I do it what does it mean what are the steps of chuva me out and you find even more tantalizing statements for example we have an ocean and Falmouth tells us but on the one hand yes it's true ain't of are all made with natural that there's nothing that is too terrible that you've uh doesn't redeem that whatever we've done we have a path but the Talmud says it's not necessarily an easy that there are steps so jouvert will help for everything but sometimes we need yom kippur to help sometimes we need to suffer a little bit unfortunately god forbid sometimes it's only when one passes away that they are considered atonement so there's a stepped as a process says one of the great authorities of the last century the myth casinos two centuries ago really died in the 1870s that that's all true for level one when it comes to children a year oh so then yeah it's true it works together with other things there is more of a winding path and a process but chuva me Ava if you go for level two truly out of love then that can leapfrog over everything else and that can bring immediate atonement okay sign me up tell me what to do where do where do I go what do I have to do in order to acquire this great and lovely truth so we're left to try to figure this out and there are many suggestions and see and there was one suggestion that was put forward and that's the long ago in the last century one of the great Torah scholars noted that there is an interesting contradiction as a verse that we're gonna read in the Torah in a few weeks in precious need solving it's a relatively well-known verse and part of the reason why it's well-known it was made into a song maybe you know it from the verse maybe you know her from the song if you don't know it at all we'll talk about it now the Torah tells us that Paris needs oven there's a language kiha mitzvah has au s-- this commandment some commandment this commandment I sure I know theme it's a facade y'all know some key I'm it's well as owns this Mitzvah that I command you today it's not beyond you loan if laceyville oh maybe I am it's not too wondrous it's not across the ocean it is not out of reach okay what Mitzvah what's the Mitzvah that we're talking about so the commentaries say well I think we can figure out what the Mitzvah is it's not explicit in the verses of the toru what we're talking about but earlier in the that same section of the Torah we find the reference to the concept of repentance the Torah says the shop tomato similar katha you will return unto God so maybe this verse is referring back to that verse that's what we're talking about repentance is not out of our reach it's not too wondrous for us so a number of the medieval commentators there abandon David Ezra and others they all assume that's what it means so there were those who said okay that sounds like a nice interpretation but I got a problem the problem is the Talmud already tells us what it means and the Talmud is more authoritative than the medieval commentators they're not supposed to disagree with the Talmud so the Talmud has a clear statement about what that verse is referring you know what it's referring to according to the Talmud it's referring to the Torah itself Torah study is not beyond you Torah study is not too wondrous it is not outside of our reach so there were those who asks why are the medieval commentators coming hundreds of years later and pretending they never read the Talmud if the Talmud tells us what the verse means why do these commentaries come in so many centuries later ignoring the Talmud and saying oh it's probably talking about repentance there's a contradiction what right do they have to ignore the Talmud so there were those who suggested one of those who suggested was of Aaron Kotler of iron collar I come from New Jersey so in New Jersey was a very large yeshiva and town of Lakewood that was founded by Rivera cutler going back about seventy years ago so Rivera cobblers suggested that maybe it's not a contradiction that maybe these authorities need evil commentaries they were well aware of what the Talmud says that the verse is talking about Torah study and when they commented that it's talking about repentance they weren't contradicting with homily they were explaining it they were saying that there are times when it's one in the same that there is an overlap that there is a common ground between Torah study and repentance and that's what the Torah is addressing when it tells us that this activity is not outside of earning and if that's true then maybe we have a hint to our elusive treasure here that maybe this is a road map to tell us how we reach that other level of chuhwa that other other level of repentance that seems so tantalizing and so attractive and yet so vague and so frustrating maybe that's what we're talking about maybe there is a path through tourist stuff and it's interesting to note that Maimonides no Maimonides codified Jewish law and he was very precise he was so careful in his language and in his categorization that he yielded a whole genre of literature so many books so many volumes have been written trying to explain and comment on Maimonides writings because the premise is always that every statement is significant if it's phrased this way if it's phrased that way if it's placed this way if it's placed that way it's always meaningful so they noted that my mind of these talks about Torah study not surprising and he writes that we have a concept of Torah lachemann what does that phrase mean torilla schmuck we normally translated perhaps as Torah for its own sake not for ulterior motives not for other reasons but for his own sake and my modern news describes what that means its own sake and he says the one who is motivated to study the Torah out of love for the creator of the world who wrote the total now that's a nicest explanation is helpful and it shouldn't surprise us that Maimonides wrote that and it wouldn't surprise us to see that we open up the highly organised code of Jewish law that he wrote and to see that in the laws of Torah study which is an extensive section and their album in Maimonides shouldn't surprise us to see us reading in that section that that's what it means to study Torah for its own sake but that's not where it is that statement that defines Torah study for its own sake you won't find it in the laws of Torah study you know where you find it in Maimonides writings very good the laws of chuhwa the laws of repentence Maimonides was unique in that area also that he treated repentance as a holic matter with rules and regulations and in the laws of repentance that's where he tells you this that's where he defines what Torah study for its own sake is the commentaries asks in the wrong place it's so careful about categorization and organization tell me that what I'm studying the rules of Torah study why is it here in the laws of repentance unless there's something going on here that when it comes to Torah study okay we don't really have to worry so much about what your motives are bring you into the study hall or bring you into classes that's good enough but when it comes to ideal Torah for its own sake that's relevant not to the laws of studying Torah that's relevant to the laws of repentance to the laws of truth now the question then becomes what is really one have to do with the other so why should we associate Torah study with repentance what's the connection so there are a couple of points of over that on the one hand it's a common journey there is a lot to take the one who's seeking to repent and the one who is seeking to advance their scholarship and to allow them to share a ride together to share a boat together on the one hands so when it comes to repentance if we look again in Maimonides code so he describes what the experience of repentance is like or perhaps more accurately what the journey towards repentance is like and he writes yesterday this person was a sinner yesterday this individual did things of which they're not and they created a distance they created a gap between themselves and God and they feel that distance they feel far and they're looking to bridge the gap they're looking to come closer that's the one who is seeking to repent what is the Torah scholar thing the Torah scholar is looking to come closer to God is looking to delve into the wisdom of the Torah and the Word of God and to bring it greater proximity to themselves so from that perspective there is a lot in common that we have a repentant individual who is seeking to bridge a gap who's seeking to come closer and we have the Torah scholar who's seeking to come closer maybe he doesn't come from such a place of distance to begin with but the essential journey is the same so from that perspective we see how they could take the same vehicle we see how they could share a ride with each other because essentially they're both seeking out the same path so it's interesting to note that we have a sacrificial order and it's over the Torah talks about the service and the temple and nowadays we don't do that you don't have a temple in Jerusalem as we know so the Talmud tells us that in the absence of all of the surface in the temple so we have another route what's that route the route is sorry Saul yes so that's also another statement that's similar that they have the idea of studying the law and Torah study about these specific topics the Talmud says that's what we use instead that if we don't actually have the ability to go to the Temple in Jerusalem and to engage in the sacrificial order so we can study Torah instead we'll learn about the concepts and that's why we find in the morning in the sitter and the prayer book there's a section at the beginning where we try to we try to recite the verses that talk about the sacrificial order we try but very often we come in late so we skip these parts one great rabbi once commented that they're called cubanos because they're the first thing to get sacrificed this way so you don't save these sections but really it could be that it's more important than the other sections of the prayer because this is what connects us to the temple experience so there were those who raised the question and there's an extensive discussion about this does that work for everything is that just about the temple or does that work for all the commandments of the total let's say somebody is on a desert island over a circus and he doesn't have a rule of an ester in excessive but he could learn about him it's one of those unusual desert islands where they don't have palm trees but they have library so you can learn the laws of Lulla Vanessa does that work for that too that if you can't fulfill that commandment so you'll learn about it and that will replace the experience the same way you find it by the Holy Temple in Jerusalem some thought yeah but others said no this is a concept that is unique to the sacrificial order why should that be so presumably it's because there's an overlap here that when it comes to the sacrifices and when it comes to the service in the temple it's all about coming closer it's all about bridging the gap and when it comes to Torah study it's about that as well it won't necessarily work for lulav or Estero where it's filled in or any other Mitzvah that we might not have access to at any given time but when the whole goal is about getting closer so then yes studying can do it as well so from that perspective we understand it so the notion that Torah study can be a venue for repentance that might help us relate because they're both traveling the same but there's more to it as well and there is another component to it and that is that Toto study when properly undertaken isn't simply an intellectual exercise but Torah study is transformational and it changes our personalities it affects who we are on a basic level I heard to our tarter this morning from my son who's celebrating his bar mitzvah coming up he mentioned an idea also from Ruth Cooke the Talmud tells us that we have to respect Torah scholars and that that applies even to a Torah scholar who's a little older and is having a hard time remembering all of his learning so it doesn't matter whether he's fluent and quick on his feet with every fact in every detail or if he doesn't really remember much of it at all either way we're supposed to respect him equal the respect that goes to a Torah scholar is to both types and it of Kuk explains so why is it that this is true because why do we revere Torah scholars is it because of the amount of information that they retain because of the details that they remember the reason we Revere Torah scholars is because we assume that that kind of commitment and that that kind of exposure and devotion to the Word of God has a transformation on the personality and that one who has lived their lives that way is a different kind of person and that's going to be true whether or not they can remember and recall all of the details that they studied and whether or not they're able to give a dazzling lecture putting it all on the place that's not really the issue the issue is that somebody who's gone through this process is a different kind of person and that's where we show reverence and respect so the encounter with divine wisdom is transformative and for that reason also it connects to the whole goal of chuubo and it provides a different tool set it gives us the ability to reach Heights that we couldn't have done before and perhaps from that perspective we look back at the Talmud statement the idea that there are different types of truths and that the basic level chuhwa truth from the Europe that is pretty wonderful that cleans the slate gives us a fresh start but that truth of may hava is even greater that allows us to take our misdeeds and turn them into credits turn them into positive things on our behalf how does that work explain to by Yosi of doves olive a chick says there's two different attitudes a person can take towards repentance there's two different plans that one can undertake when they seek to take a different path on the one hands first approach is to say I've done a lot of things I'm not proud of and I want to change I want to forget about everything yesterday I want to cut myself off from whatever has been and to become someone new and when someone takes that attitude okay will say fine that's what you want that's what you'll get a clean slate nothing is held against you you can start over fresh but there's another attitude also and that's the attitude of one who says yeah I've made a lot of mistakes yeah I've done a lot of things that I'm not so proud of and that I would like to change my relationship to and yes I want to be different tomorrow than I was yesterday but it's not an attitude of I want to forget about everything that has been filling in and I want to cut myself off from all of my path but I recognize that everything that I've gone through is a part of my personality is a part of my potential to grow and I can take all of those life experiences and even if in the past I've used them in negative ways I can now take that in a positive direction and whatever I've learned from my mistakes whatever I have done that I wasn't so proud of is the source of insights and to whatever extent I have seen that I have enthusiasm I have potential I have capacities I can take that and do good things with it so now those misdeeds they're not just erased they're converted they're transformed so sattva salivate check if that's the attitude if the attitude is not simply fear I don't want to get in trouble I don't want to pay the price from my mistakes if that's the attitude okay so then fine your past is gone you start over tomorrow fresh but if your attitude is I want to embrace my potential in its full of sense I want to take everything that I have learned through all of my experiences good and bad and use them to be something phenomenal tomorrow so then indeed all those experiences are accredited they are a source of potential accomplishment and therefore makes sense that we look at that greater level that we look at that idea that an individual is able to be come something greater than they were because of everything they've gone through and it's the exposure to the wisdom of the Torah that helps us do that that helps us connect in such a full way with what our potential is that now something magnificent can emerge from it it's fascinating there is an idea that I was just two more minutes but there was a great casillas Rabi it was known as the soffit over a bee it was from Bornstein and he was respected in the high sea together nonspecific worlds because he was a tremendous expert in Tomlin and how often in the Talmud in the Jewish law he was the author of a work of responsa it's called the Omni nazar and he was also the author of a great work on the laws of Shabbos and in the introduction to that work of the laws of Shabbos yes a fascinating statement says sometimes I have people who come to me and they feel guilty so why do they feel guilty about same rabbi I think I'm doing something wrong I think I'm not really doing what I'm supposed to be done why what's bothering them they're involved in Torah study now you recall we mentioned earlier tonight that there's a notion and ideal of Torah lachemann that Torah should be without ulterior motives it should be for its own sake so what was bothering these people who came to the avinasi they said maybe we're doing something wrong because I studied Torah all the time but I'm not sure if I'm doing it for its own sake because I love it I get such pleasure out of the study I enjoy it so much we call that a gimmick and learning in yesh so maybe that's not called the right motives maybe that's not called for its own sake maybe I'm just doing it because I enjoy it so much so maybe that's not really a religious act maybe that's not really a mitzvah so they would come to the Afghan nazar and say I feel guilty I think I'm doing something wrong and the abbé the nazar would respond to them says actually the opposite what does it mean to learn Torah for its own sake it means to have such an appreciation for what you are coming in contact with to create a personality that identifies so strongly with the values that you're studying that yes you feel a sense of delight you feel that this is where I want to be and there's no greater feeling than that if said the option is if you come to me and say that I'm learning Torah all day and I hate it but I'm doing it anyway because it's a commandment then I'd be worried you said then I say you're actually not really accomplishing very much but if you come and say that I'm learning all day and I'm motivated to do that because I love it what about the Mitzvah that is the Mitzvah the Mitzvah is to feel such a connection and to create such a sense of identification that yes it's a tremendously enjoyable experience that's what torilla Schmoe means and the more you're able to do that the more you are bringing your personality in wine that's ultimately what this study is asking us to accomplish there is a pretty busy season coming up and we have a number of festivals we have as we mentioned Rosh Hashanah and we have Yom Kippur we have circus and at the end of Circus we have the observance of some historical so some Castoro that's maybe one of the downsides of making alia that in America you have a day that's designated first into historic eight days here it's one day yontiff social media has Eris has to share the space with Simple Start it's still worth it to make a yacht but it's a little bit of a different experience but sim first aura is a relatively late concept it's not something that's in the tour itself it's not something that's really in the tablet itself it's an interesting question how it developed and we now have a cycle of going through the prior show once a year so we finished the way things are set up we finished reading the Torah at the end of the festival of circus we observe some close Torah then but it wasn't always that way and it's not clear why there is this association of the celebration of the Torah with circus where the end of Circus so perhaps we could suggest that there is a message here the chuhwa season the idea that we already have begun the season of el volantis ray of personal growth and transformation so we have Rosh Hashanah and Yom Kippur and then we have circus and it's a great Jewish philosophers explains that Russia shot on Yom Kippur that's about chuhwa me Europe that is the time that we devote to repenting out of a sense of reverence those are the days when we tremble when we fast and when we cry and when we're nervous that's what Rush Hashanah and Yom Kippur are about then comes circus circus is not distinct and separate from restaurant on Yom Kippur it is very much a piece of that season but it's a completely different focus it is the happiest festival of the year the Talmud says that one who hasn't seen the celebration on circus has never seen a celebration in his life and that's a reason to be in Israel you see the whole country celebrates and party for a week straight because it is the happiest of the festivals and yet that's not post true of a season that is a part of the true of the season but that is an integral component what we are doing when we look to grow into change and that they understood these philosophers that circus is the festival of Truffaut my album it's the festival where we look to repent not through fasting and crying not through fear of punishment but through embracing all that is positive in our lives and feeling that sense of love my oldest daughter was born arizuka is the day before a circus so we gave her the middle name Ahuva for this reason I mover means beloved it is to represent this idea that took is a time of true for me Ava but that's the theme that this festival rings and that's a crucial component of the season of truth so that's what's going on is there any more appropriate time to celebrate some customer is there any more appropriate time to say I am going to sing and dance today out of pure joy because of the concept of tour in my life that's what Circus is about that's what the whole season culminates it that is the crowning event of the chuhwa season so perhaps these coming weeks as we go through this process it's a little bit of a grueling process it's a lot of late nights and sleepless and a lot of tears and a lot of fasting but ultimately we see that's step one in a glorious joyful process that brings us to a stage of transformation that we embrace our potential as fullest and that we use this to find the motivation and the drive within ourselves to be everything that we can be then by the time that festival closes so we dance with a joy and an excitement that is beyond imagination so maybe if we could just quickly recap some of the major points we noted that Chava is both the easiest and the hardest commandments that it's the easiest the Talmud tells us that can happen in a moment without moving from your seats and you can transform your whole status on the other hand it's the hardest because we never really know before successful if we've actually accomplished what we need to accomplish and we find that it's even more catalyzing than that because the Talmud tells us there are two levels one level which cleans our slate chuva that's motivated by fear or reverence but there's a greater level that turns our misdeeds into positive credits for us and that's true for my OPLAN we tried to figure out how do you achieve that that's even more vague so we mentioned that there was this tension that the Torah talks about a mitzvah that's not beyond our grasp and the commentaries explain it's a reference to chula and yet the Talmud already told us it's a reference to Torah study and it was suggested that perhaps they're one in the same that there are times when Torah study is the venue for chuhwa and perhaps this is our elusive chuhwa may Allah we noted that Maimonides codifies the concept and the definition of Torah for its own sake in the laws of chuhwa and we tried to understand why that would be we noted that on the one hand they share a past that the one who was looking to bridge a gap created by sitting and looking to repent is traveling the same path as the scholar who's looking to understand God more deeply and bring himself closer but more than that the counter of Torah study is transformational and gives us an insight into our character and makes us people on a more elevated plane and we noted that that's why even a Torah scholar who doesn't remember any of the details of what he studied is still accorded the same degree of respect as but Cooke explained because it's about the character building it's not about all those details and then we explain this verse Olive a chick noted that when it comes to change there are two approaches one can take one can say I want to forget about everything until now and run away from my past okay that person gets a clean slate the one can also say that I want to take what I've learned from all my experiences and use that as potential for the future and that is why it makes sense that these experiences should not only be not held against the person but instead should be a source of merit a source of credit and that transformational aspect of Torah study feeling a greater sense of connection to it is where that comes from we mentioned the advantageous response to the individual who felt guilty that maybe he's learning for ulterior motives because he enjoys it too much and the avenues are said just the opposite that's what it means to learn Torah for the right reason to feel such a connection that it is a source of joy and then we noted that simcha Torah has developed as a day that closes off the circus festival and why is it placed there and that we suggested that perhaps it aligns with the understanding that many philosophers had that Rosh Hashanah and Yom Kippur they start off the true the season with a focus on reverence with a focus on trying to avoid the punishments associated with our mistakes but the joyous festival of Circus is also a part of the truth'll process that's where we embrace all the positive all the hope and all the potential and there is no more appropriate time to connect to the Torah in its most emotional most heartfelt way and perhaps that's the theme that will bring us through the season and it's our hope that all of us will come out on the other end as people who are happier more complete and more in fulfillment of our potential in the service of God thank you so much we show a wonderfully active season so let me ask you the question first about your question so are you asking it because you're not aware of a brothel recited untrue of us so it's an interesting question because when you bring it up it's interesting to think about this topic is not explained clearly in the town but the Talmud talks a lot about the blessings that are recited on Commandments but it never explains why there are some commandments that have and some that don't so it was the test that was taken up by some of the medieval commentaries and later generations as well to try to figure out some kind of a organizing principle why is it that some Commandments you take a Liubov you take you take an asteroid gets it in the sucker so that recites that we were sighted a blessing you put on fillings recites organize and recite to blessings you know how does he get to there and one for a Luminess robe and you give charity for example right that's one of our defining mitzvahs and yet there is no broth associated with that so the commentaries tried to figure it out so two of the most often cited approaches one of is the rash paw the rash poo is one of the great medieval commentators snow mobile benaderet and later than him the author of the chiffon RF of the code of Jewish law we're also a commentary called base Yosef they both have theories so the rash buzz theory sounds like any Mitzvah that's contingent upon somebody else or has an aspect that in your hands you don't recite of ratha so he talks about stucco it's a little bit of a discussion how to understand what he's getting at but it sounds like he says that maybe I can make a broth on stokka because maybe I will offer a needy individual some stock up and he's not going to accept so the Mitzvah is not actually going to be up to me to complete and maybe I only make a broth on a mitzvah that is distinct and defined then that I am completing it is up to me on the other hand you have the base yo safe they Co safe has a discussion it is how come when it comes to comments all right so we have a notion that on Pesach we have to get rid of our thumb mates before it pays up we get rid of our comments and when we do that so you know the night before paste that for example so we check the house for comments and then we declare what we call bitl huh mates we declare that we're not interested in any of the comments that may be under the couch so the language that we use for the braava is the burning of the hummus the next morning we burn the huh mates we don't make the broth ah that focuses on language of negating the huh mates mentally the decoration that we're not interested in the homies so that they sell safe rights that any Mitzvah that is actually an internal process that's not really about any physical activity you don't make a broth on it so you can make a broth on Burnie foamies broth on deciding that you're not that's an internal process and that you don't make a broth on so one could take either approach and perhaps apply it to the question yeah right right so you do an action so then okay we could define that and we can say make a profit but what is something that's a mental process that we don't actually have anything to look at so then there's no profit there so the truth is we could apply both of those approaches to this question if we take the rationals approach so we could say how could you make a brothel on chuva it's not fully in your hands we don't know when we've completed it we don't know if we've succeeded it's not this like chauffeur a Lulla where we can say all right I heard the chauffeur I took a little of I sat in the sukkah I know I did the Mitzvah so the rash was approached me were here as well when it comes to Chula and the base yellow slaves approach would work even better according to what we're saying that Chava is not a discrete action that we can look at but it is a transformation of the soul and of the character and there's nothing more internal than that and as much as that is not only a commandment perhaps a defining commandment of who we are at the same time it transcends the categories that are normally associated with aggression perhaps pretty amazing and if we look in the past yeah that's it well put but you know you could even say it without necessarily attacking secularism because it's really a miracle that's how the rabbinic literature presents it that the reality of life is that what happens is there and that what has taken place in the past is unchangeable and the notion that one can essentially rewrite the past that one can take transformative action that not only will address the future but we'll have a retroactive effect on what has happened until now that many of the rabbinic writers explained is essentially miraculous it defies nature and that's something that is awe-inspiring pretty powerful thought so that's also an interesting question because there clearly is attention there and there's also attention the way Maimonides starts the code has attracted a lot of commentary because he has as you noted a uniquely intense approach towards repentance which other halawet codes did not take like the Shannara for example later code of Jewish law you don't have the laws of chula codified the same way you have details of your Kippur like but you don't have the concept of repentance regulated and how it extends and yet the Rambam at the same time as he does this he starts off with the words there is a commandment that when one is interested in repentance one should do v2e which we normally translate as confession so many the commentaries say what are you talking about are you telling me there's no commandment to repent the language of all if you choose to repent so then here's the way you do it you should do it through confession is the round I'm actually maintaining there is no mitzvah to repent and there were commentaries who took that stance and others such as resolve a chick said it can't be again he's has ten chapters the laws of repentance but also it's an explicit verse Allah Thor as we mentioned before you shall return to God and then the question about whether the next verse was talking about that but it is an explicit versal in surah so how could their album say there is no Mitzvah and he went on to explain that of course there is such a Mitzvah but by its very nature it is undefinable and it's internal and personal so if we're going to have a whole attic approach if we're going to come to it through the tools of Mitzvah and regulation and Torah so that we have to create a format and that format is what we call confession meaning acknowledging where our shortcomings have occurred in the past and the assumption being that by taking that accounting by considering what we've done wrong that will hopefully provoke that internal response that we actually call children so in essence this very delicate balance between definable actions and invisible transformation of the character which truly represents perhaps Maimonides in his code is actually providing a portal to that in a fascinating way so it seems like they are qualitatively different the Talmud has a statement that is beyond our understanding for a lot of reasons but it relates to this point the Talmud says that we know that King David sinned with Bathsheba and the Talmud tells us that really this was not something you would have expected to happen this is not something that King David would have been likely to do but the providence was that it happened so that he can teach us the path to personal repentance we can look to King David as a model for what it means to repent for our misdeeds and then in the same statement the Talmud says the Jews sinned as a community with the golden calf after the giving of the Torah and time the given with her and they also were not likely to have gotten into such a situation but again that was a point of Providence in order to teach the concept of repentance on a communal level in other words we need to role models maybe King David to teach the individual repentance and we need the episode of the Golden Calf to teach communal repentance and that concept seems to indicate that they exist on two different planes but it's much more than that as well that we have a notion that Yom Kippur requires a reconciliation to happen that we cannot just simply go to shul and you're Kippur and pray and cry and have been obnoxious to our friends all year long and done terrible things to the people around us and hope that your Kippur is going to take care of it the Talmud tells us very clearly value Kippur is only going to work if we first do what's necessary to reconcile to address what we've done wrong to other people and there are those who have explained that it triggers this communal context that the reason it's so important it's not necessarily because the individual transgression can only be dealt with in that way but it's because when there are gaps in our relationships when we aren't a unified community so then the concept of the atonement on Yom Kippur is fundamentally flawed that we achieve the communal atonement through our connection to those around us and if our relationships are afraid if we don't feel a connection to those around us so then we find ourselves where we are we find ourselves in exile and tsch above which the Talmud tells us is because of our broken relationships and similarly M Kippur is not going to atone until we do what we can to try to bridge that gap so there is a absolutely qualitative distinction that comes from a communal connection it's not simply the aggregate of individuals but it is a whole new entity that is created through that identification and Shuba is completely different obligation during this absolutely yeah that's why we come together as a community and that's why we have this focus on acquiring forgiveness yeah that's good that's the what halakhah that we can't live without that everything else we mentioned chauffeur or luminesce work and fasting all of those things that could be that you're not going to necessarily be able to do it a person may not have a lulav and escrow may not be able to get to show for Rosh Hashanah and here the chauffeur may be a person is not healthy enough to fast any one of these laws that we find in Tishrei you can live with that except one the only one that you can't survive without the Mishna says in Kippur does nothing unless you try to fix your relationships unless you ask forgiveness from those who you have offended so everything else is less important in it everything else vesting in the show who live in Ashford nothing reaches that level of absolute necessity yeah that's a difficult concept that's a concept the philosophers talk about at great length he's not unless the phosphors try to understand what that idea means the idea the Torah says that God hardened the heart of Pharaoh so it sounds like he lost his free will how do we reconcile that with a notion that everyone has the ability to change and there are a number of different theories among the theories is that perhaps this is the the one that maybe fits a little bit the best is that actually that was his free will that the notion was that really his left to his own devices would have considered he would have continued to enslave the Jews forever but he was undergoing these plagues so the plagues would have forced his hand would have forced him to release the Jews against his will so he doesn't deserve any credit for that so in essence he was reverted to his own character and that's the desire that he had to keep them enslaved he was able to do that through his heart being hardened so that he should pay the price he deserved to pay others understand that yes it's true that everyone has the ability to do shuva but it's not always given that you're gonna have the circumstances that are going to make that possible that's a gift the idea that you will have everything fall into place that you'll be able to try to rectify all the damage that you've done and that you'll be able to try to compensate that that is a gift from God that you have those circumstances and not everyone deserves it someone who has stumbled and it was made a few mistakes so God gives him that grace that he should have that ability to take the opportunity to correct the mistakes but someone who has devoted themselves over the course of a lifetime to evil acts it's not necessarily a given that you will always have such a chance then there's also a theory that some of the commentaries have that we have to assume that there is a different standard for world leaders because since they affect the path of history so it's difficult to say that the same standard of freewill that applies to an individual is going to apply to a king because the King's decisions are going if God is controlling history in such a major effect so we have the notion of label often Basara be a design that the art the leaders and kings is in the hands of God it's a difficult concept because that that really has to be reconciled more with the notion of personal free will so perhaps the other theories are a little bit more palatable sorry yeah Oh in the Torah for sure leaders have all different standards for sure but the notion this is a harder concept to accept that freewill should which is such an axiomatic idea that because you happen to be a king that you should be excluded from that so that's a harder concept to reconcile but that was the the view that some with commentaries that all right thank you so much I wish you really a wonderful scene with Toby should be was summit over should be active of success of growth [Music]