Metaphysical Connection of Honoring Parents and Honoring Shabbat with Rabbi Aaron Dovid Poston

[Music] at bait midrash a warm welcome home to toro we've been away for a few weeks and we are in parshas kidoshim katoshim to you chapter 19 of leviticus verse 3 but before we start i want to mention a few things number one i don't think i ever say this but i'm going to say it it's in your interest tap the subscription bell and the description you know subscribe and tap the bell so you will be informed when new videos are uploaded not just for me but for all the other rabbis on the ipana channel um i just want to mention we had an amazing and amazing seder pesach and rabbi brydowicz ran it conducted it wow it was very uplifting and we learned a lot everyone learned a lot and the next thing i want to mention is just a side point but it's really a very important point and that is i want to thank all of our donors you know there were a lot of people that contributed and we were resolved to give out tens of thousands of shekels to need these families over pesach and we do it throughout the year as well so keep that in mind we do a lot of but we also there were there were a handful a handful of very big donors i don't want to mention their names they know who they are and they really helped us uh not just this holiday the last holiday and they gave they contributed a lot and i want to just say yoshikawa hashem should bless you continue to bless you and your families the next point i want to make is i know a lot of no haids do watch these videos we will be talking somewhat at the end or towards the end about noah laws because even though they are seven in principle let's say any mitzvah that is logical and ethical non-jews gentiles are also obligated yes so it's kadai it's worthwhile knowing what they are and we're going to deal with kibut of the aim and specifically also yayirat the the honoring as well as the fearing of your parents two separate mitzvahs in chapter 19 verse 3 ish each man let's say a man or each man and every man his mother and his father he should fear now you should fear it's actually plural that the that you should fear them the etch shop so sigh and god is speaking through moses of course and my shabbos is tishmaru you shall guard an ishm eloquecham now just a side point um i might as well just add this now because non-jews are not obligated in shabbat like jews are but it's a very worthwhile cause for them to celebrate shabbat in a certain way not as jews do but as any as we'll go through this what is the what is the icker what is one of the prime lessons shabbos is supposed to teach us as jews as well as every human being on the earth we will discuss that because god says so that we should observe his shabboses and we should know why also why we should honor or fear our parents so that's going to be the verse we're going to deal with and for those who are not familiar we learn from the clea car amazing rabbi 400 years ago just over 400 years ago and um we use the hebrew text and i encourage you to go onto the website there's a link down below you just have to find which book that we're talking about which is leviticus you go into the website you go to leviticus and then you go to the year of the particular sheer that we're talking about because each year is different meaning different pages okay so let's begin we just mentioned this verse hashem and now he the clear car says look at rashi perish rashi rashi says something here and it's going to seemingly contradict something that he says somewhere else i'm just like spoon feeding you what's going on here so rashi says if one's father or parent would say to them to desecrate the shabbos khalel do not listen to him obviously what do you mean don't listen to him god said do something your father said do something so what one second so i have to listen to god over and above my father that's clearly what it's saying correct well one second what you're about to hear in partials of the yakow rashi says over there now that parsha is you can find this on the source sheet number three in exodus 35 2. it's talking about shabbos that's in verse 2. believe it or not also verse three six days work may be done but on the seventh day you shall have sanctity a day of complete rest of the lord whoever performs work thereon in this day shall be put to death shaishus yamin who says over there that mode me moses prefaced meaning right in in the torah itself what comes first shabbos came right before the details of the work of the mishkan telling you that the work of the mishkan does not supersede the sabbath so whatever comes first which is shabbos takes preference over what comes next the mishkan so every seventh day we stop working on the mishkan so the clear car points out what's the lesson what's the point shabbat labini the very fact that that verse in 35 in um in exodus says right that what comes first shabbos and then the building of the mishkan what's it teaching that you must stop working in order to sanctify the shabbat shabbat takes profit precedence what is the point these three words whatever came first pushes off whatever is second now go back to our partial we just said honor your parents came first then smirat shabbat is second so if that same principle would apply then it would make any sense what rashi was saying in in our in our parsha in kadoshi to you so the clear car right away says shinee it's different over here why is it different over here it says like this i'm going to try to give you some groundwork to work to work with right in the beginning it says amen his father his mother his father they it does end off saying they shall fear meaning you plural should fear but it does start off in a singular fashion okay so he i'll just read again singular but at the end meaning the last part of the verse at least even the last part of the first part of the verse the sends with plural you can look in rashi clearly says it anyway if you don't know the language it also says tishmaru now tishma is also plural they now who's they are the the you plural is it the same i'm going to just give you a little bit more i'm going to spoon food you'll speed spoon feed you a little bit more apparently what the clear card is going to say is in the first part of the verse it's ish the isha a man and a woman or a man and his wife yeah they have to honor their parents but in the second part when it's talking about shabbos it's talking about a father and a son okay and let's see how he expresses it so lam it all works well and i understand t roo in the beginning of the verse when it's talking about revering your parents that's going on male female both the male the husband and the wife have to honor their own parents plus right the children male and female children have to honor their own parents could perish rashi just like rashi explained okay i'll show you where look in the very beginning of rashi so every man shall fear his mother and father every one of you shall fear his mother and his father that's the simple meaning a midrashic explanation however the since the verse literally says every man shall fear so we know the supply this law applies to a man because it actually says man but how do we know that it applies to a woman as well so when the scripture says tears you shall fear using the plural form two are included in the verse namely men and women it makes sense i'm going to use the word horizontally so it's using the male and female children have to honor their parents horizontally okay because a man oh so so one second would i leave off but if this is the case why does the verse actually say every man it says ish then that's because the man usually has the ability to fulfill this commandment without restriction meaning he has his own bank account right he is the master of the house he works and what not he's independent and he's thus obligated to fear his parents whereas a woman i'm going to try to use this in what we'll call pc and obviously we're not going to use that in pc terms but we have to understand that the male is basically um a caretaker to a certain extent a protector let's say called a protector he has a certain authority over over his wife so to speak okay so the woman sometimes when she's married has a certain obligation to her own husband okay we're going to see clearly that the man also has an obligation to his wife it's absolutely fantastic so even though we're talking in terms that are not very pc we're not going to try to whitewash anything the woman to a certain extent it feels a certain obligation to her husband because he is her protector okay then let's go to the next part of the rashi that every man shall fear his mother and his father now we actually know what we'll save this for the end we're going to save this for the end because very beautiful okay now let's go back into the clear car because he says i understand about tyra it's talking about the male and the female but when it comes to shabbos why does it say tishmaru lush and isn't it true i would learn male and female just as well no elevation is not going on male female even though it is true that the females are obligated to keep shabbos we learn that from somewhere else i'll just as a side point i'll tell you where we do learn that from whenever we have a mitzvah asexual grammar a positive mitzvah that's time bound women are actually not obligated when we have the same mitzvah that's a negative command meaning refraining from doing things then there becomes an overlap and she actually becomes obligated in those positive misses that are time bound that are connected to the negatives so therefore since shabbos has a zakar and a sham or there's a positive aspect and a negative aspect i don't mean customer strong and negative aspect about chavez i'm just referring to the concept of assay positive acts as opposed to refraining from doing things called don'ts so she's obligated in those she's automatically obligated as well in the positives okay so what is it telling you it's going on the father and son i'm going to just call it vertical it's called when it's using plural they shall write you plural shall guard the shabbos it's talking about the father and son meaning both the father and the son are obligated my honor says god now really this is just laying the groundwork for i think i think this is the most beautiful paragraph we're about to enter umasha paratha shabbat yochair now interestingly enough and this goes into the the clear car which we didn't read yet i want to go into where it says and you shall observe my sabbaths in rashi rashi says now this is very interesting to read it in the hebrew you guys have the english it says like this there is a juxtaposition now the juxtaposition is not just here we're in leviticus 19 3 but just think about their two sets of ten commandments mitzvah four in both of them is shabbos and immediately after you have the mitzvah of honoring your parents kibbut advain okay so that is in chapter exodus chapter 20 is the first set of tablets in exodus in deuteronomy chapter 5 you have the second set of talents so you have a juxtaposition of honoring slash fearing let's just say and then you have immediately the mitzvah of so you start out with shabbos number four and immediately goes into honoring your parents which is let's say equivalent to a certain extent even though they are separate missiles let me just explain the difference also when it comes to kavod when it says honoring your parents those are active positive acts feeding them causing them to drink right bringing them hot tea or cold drinks on a hot day clothing them bringing them a blanket meeting them at the door right driving them to their doctor's appointments whatever it is you can actively physically help them whereas fear are things you refrain from doing don't contradict them okay don't stand in their place don't sit in his seat or her seat right there's things that you're refraining from doing there are two separate misses i know that we may think they're all just one bunched up together as one but they actually are that's how we get to 613 mitzvahs right there's so many things that are broken down into like even shabbos is two separate misses okay so here we go so this clear car i'm sorry the rash he says scripture juxtaposes the commandment actually i was in the russian hebrew and he mentioned as i just said now what's it telling you why is there this juxtaposition lo mart to tell you alfa peace is even though god says i commanded you al mora of regarding revering your own parents hearing in case this is your father that if he tells you desecrate the shabbos i'll tishmallow don't listen to him but the next four hebrew words are amazing he says the truth is this is also true by all of the mitzvahs and i want to say that rashi is saying this based on logic now the truth is it's sourced earlier right there's the madrish in paulson vamos and also above mitsia but it's based on logic it's based on logic so we know that it's an ethical misform and it's a logical mitzvah as well and where's the logic based on wait till you hear this this also benefits should be aware of this and if only my own jewish brother and sisters who don't keep shabbos would hear this perhaps they would if they just hear it understand it and would take a little bit more time to honor the shabbat because when you're honoring shabbat you're really honoring hashem okay so listen to the words of the clerical he began by telling us like this that why does the torah going to specify the midst of shabbos more than any other mitzvah in the torah you see already that all if your father tells you to desecrate the shabbos you don't listen to him but the truth is like rashi says that's true by any other mitz he says eat this pork you say sorry dad i'm not going to listen to you right or any other avera so it's based on shabbos it seems to be we'll call the paradigm lesson the paradigm example given and from that we can learn everything else as rashi says the cole shar mitzvah torah now he's going to tell us the reason for the mitzvah of kibbut or in this case so let's say like the prime reason not it's not a secret it should be it actually should be so obvious that it's actually fitting it's logical to attribute honor to distribute and a lot honor to the one who brought you into existence obviously if you cannot stand life if you think existence i don't know what words to use but anything negative right well then i understand why you would not want to distribute honor but here we're talking about existence is so great that hashem here in this case you're talking about your parents if your parents brought you into and i'll use his words i think they're very poetic into the light of existence light is in light right hello avica let's let's say this is talking about your physical human father is it not that he made you who oh he actually created you he made you if that's true how is it that you're not going to attribute and give honor to the one that brought you into existence that created you kizula because without him if he didn't do it he didn't marry your mother never got married you would not exist let's say allegedly perhaps hashem in his mercy would give you somewhere else but anyway you wouldn't exist certainly as you are the shabbat moyra what is it about shabbos shabbos itself reflects teaches enlightens us that's actually teaching us towards honoring hashem this is a very important point up until the last 200 years philosophers and scientists believed let's just say the mainstream believed that the world always existed it was only until perhaps the big bang theory took off and became quite popular before that the philosophers and the scientists believe the world always existed which means there is no creator how can there be a god even they came to believe there may be a creation but anyway the very fact what does shabbos do it brings into our consciousness that there was a creation six days the world was created approximately six thousand years ago and hashem is the creator there's such a thing as called creation now the truth is it doesn't only mean once actually we believe that god is actually recreating every nanosecond meaning that he likes what he created he wants it to exist and he's causing it to exist therefore it's as if it comes into existence every nanosecond so there's a thing called let's just say it means creation in general and it was hashem that brought you not just you your father also into existence or as we say into the light of existence and if your father can imagine somebody doing this imagine someone's father telling their child to desecrate the shabbos what the clear car loves to do is to go into the psychology of the mind of the father so none of us know anybody like this but let's imagine this is what goes on in a father's mind who tells a jewish man's right tells his son his jewish son to desecrate god's holy day he's trying to mislead lita either to cause him to make a mistake or to lean in his heart in a direction where he thinks that the world always existed and it never was created and never had a creator kiday as if as if he's trying to teach you i am your only father and you have no other father but me i am your sole reason for existence s-o-l-e not your s-o-u-l right i'm your s-o-l-e i am your sole reason for existence and you have no other father and you have no other being that you need to thank for your existence the omar khalsa and why is he saying this he's saying this in order to return he's trying to seduce you or entice you to nullify the will of god right he wants you to do his will and not god's will lo ta'al then the truth is don't listen to him don't be enticed by him don't desire what your earthly father says because the real truth is this that yes the real truth is that hashem the holy one blessed be he he is the father of all of us every single one of us and therefore you're actually obligated to do is to nullify your father's will before hashem's will do god's will over over your earthly father's will because both you and your father are obligated to honor hashem but remember we asked the question why does rashi come out and say the truth is this is by this is true by all other misses as well so what we're learning is from shabbas you can learn all the others so we don't have this lesson except here by shabbos why do we not have this lesson anywhere else because this is the this is the prime example paradigm example he says now if your father would have told you to violate any other command it's so obvious it's logical yeah that's why non-jews are all so obligated it's so obvious you wouldn't listen to him kozman shiroshi what does that mean it's a very poetic and what i think it means is like this you know why you're not gonna listen to him the whole time that your head is screwed on straight the whole time that you're wearing the crown right the whole time that the crown is on your head what kind of what kind of crown do you have what what do you mean your head is crowned it means that your head's on straight that you're thinking straight you're thinking logically that you have this ultimate creator that you owe all your all your existence to the atami that is provided you yourself are keeping shabbos according to the law remember there's a different law for jew and non-jew but everyone's keeping it according to whatever their law is and what do you believe um you ultimately ultimately believe in the one lord god who created us all he is our father he is our creator he created the world sarik now regarding that meaning all the other commands you don't need to even be told that as long as you have shabbos down meaning the concept of shabbos then you would understand obviously all the other misses as well that means provided right is it as long as you're not going to argue with the prime principle of let's just say judaism of our faith even the non-jews that are listening who are of the highest caliber of nochides they understand how shabbos is central to our faith that we have to be extremely careful when it comes to shabbos and through that we understand all the other mitzvahs as well now he's answering why we find the juxtaposition of what of the mitzvah of honoring your parents or fearing your parents always next to or in close proximity to the laws of shabbos kigam hashab is on the call no tsar because if that's true right also shabbos the the paradigm lesson one of the paradigm lessons of shabbos is that you are honoring the first father of all creation that is hashem the uk and he adds something from the gomorrah conducion which you could find in number five on the english sheet the point here is that there are three partners in man this is what i call the holy trinity of judaism okay there are three partners in man the gamora here brings a lot of proofs that there is a a similarity in terms of honoring hashem as your creator as well as your parents okay and then if you bring in true let's say you honor your parents properly you're also bringing the shrine into the home and there'll be peace in the home the point that i wanted to mention to you if you look at number six um we mentioned that there are three partners in man the word man is adam olive alef dalid men and gamatria in the value system is 45 aleph is one dialed is four and mem is 40. easily 45. you don't need a calculator but what is it broken down to we say that the father is responsible for the white stuff and therefore that goes towards the building of the bones and the whites of your eyes and various other things the mother who gives the red the seed that's responsible for the flesh and the blood and the organs and everything else and then the maybe the black of the eye and the bar he gets the spirit he without that you have nothing i mean you need all three so here you have it that if you add all those up of is three aleph embed is one and two equals three the word aim mother is one and forty so forty one and three that's forty and you're left over with the olive the olive by the way is symbolic i'm just going to show you a picture for those that don't know what a mouth looks like so basically you have a love with two yards and above is six and each yud is ten twenty six not only does aleph mean one it's it's it's representative of god himself in terms of what we just saw in terms of aloof means the general the master as well as it means to learn and gather wisdom right and we see there is a lot of allusions to kaneshwara who himself in the letter olive so all together that equals 45 and that's how the clear card ends this paragraph shlosha shutterfield okay now we're going to continue and what we thought we were saying before seemed to be low pc however when we really examined it hashem's ways are pleasantness and his paths are paths of peace let's enter the third paragraph with an open mind omar shamachti moira imo la aviv when it comes to the mitzvah of fearing your parents it mentions mother first and then it mentions your father as we pointed out when it comes to honoring it's the father is mentioned first hashem created us he knows the psychology he knows the the the strengths and weaknesses of each sex of each partner right so listen to this life though so now all the everyone can rest assure rest rest you know why when it comes see also the man is obligated to honor his own wife do you know what it says in gomorrah vamos that a man is actually obligated to honor his wife more than he honors himself that's unbelievable because even the concept of love your neighbors yourself right the after the reach does not require somebody to give up we know the example rebechiva and the people who walk into the desert on shabbos right if you have just enough water you're walking with another person you have just enough water for one person to make it back to civilization if you both share you both die and if you give it away it's suicide you have no obligation to give your water in fact you would be foolish to give your water away you have to save your own life first okay so even though we have the principle as rebbe akiva said love your neighbor yourself it's like the major principle he himself held that you don't give the water away you keep it for yourself but when it comes to your wife she is you there's no there's no problem okay sh and you have to honor her more than yourself so if you know that so soccer these are famous words which basically mean you might have thought mistakenly though so as a son who you're you're a child and you see that your own father's obligated to honor his wife your mother more than he honors himself you might think that her honor comes first we know that the father is obligated to honor the mother alcane that's why the torah puts the father first to teach you that you have to honor them the same in reality there is a little bit of difference if there's if they're both asking for something we're not going to deal with that right now but in truth you have to honor both parents you might have thought you're just going to honor her because he's on her too even more than himself no you have the obligation is on you to honor your father too and that's why he comes first in the in the verse even though both the son and the father are obligated in honoring the mother still the puts the father first to remind you that you still have an obligation to honor him now what about fear um what about fear and we said that the mother came first right so tsarik's back into the pc mode okay so there needs to be the wife also has an obligation because he's protecting her she has certain obligations to him so then you would have thought one second then you would have thought saka daita kamina shamora aimbo right larry because he's stronger that's why he's protecting her so you might have thought that her fear isn't so important because she's going to be honoring or fearing him more al cain hicktime that's why god went out of his way and put the mother first when it comes to fear to teach you shakopanim that your fear for her should still be upon you okay so that really summed up so far the clear card but i wanted to mention about this concept of logic and i want to mention like i think we got it clear this is a prime example of honoring parents is stemming from the like the paradigm example which shabbos represents so i want to just go into a little bit because um somebody mentioned on one of the no high websites about nullified they can be atheists there's nothing wrong with just being a good person and following the seven laws well first of all the seven laws are not just seven they're seven principles and anything logical or ethical they're obligated as well keep that in mind but i also want to mention this very important point and that is that the rambam says there's two types of meaning every gentile is really under the category of they're in the status of ben nach but in terms of being righteous a righteous gentile there are two categories so there's a righteous gentile who's called the wise of the nations amongst the um and then there are um of those of the righteous truly righteous of the nations and they're called khasid and he differentiate differentiates between these two it seems like the wise could be atheists and those who are righteous are not atheists they they're true believers in god so i want to just elaborate on the difference according to the rambam at least one major let's say version that's accepted is that the one who's considered wise is because he came to it on only logic it's just logic not because god said so not because it says in the torah but because he came to it on his own logic this makes sense hashem will bless this person in this world i'm not sure that's the best but it's better than nothing wouldn't that be a great thing for non-jewish blessings a decent person keeps whatever we'll call the seven or high laws out of logic and logic alone however measure for measure he doesn't believe in resurrection of the dead he doesn't believe the torah is from heaven he doesn't believe in reward and punishment he doesn't believe in god he's not going to see the world to come he'll be blessed in this world whereas the khasid um the one who will experience eternal life and will be experienced the resurrection of the dead it's because he believes in the torahs from god right he believes the church from god which means the torah is true and therefore the jewish people have a mission he believes in their mission and he's willing to help them in that mission unbelievable that's already worlds apart of these different types of people they could be totally ethical seemingly people but one has eternal life and the other one does not therefore ultimately what i must say is that we as humans do not know what goes on in someone else's heart even if they claim to be an atheist many people i would say agnostic anyway and many people who when you really drill them you really question them and they get a chance to question their own thoughts perhaps they're really not atheists maybe they are agnostics what i'm quoting is the rambam and i i think that what he's doing and it makes a lot of sense what he's doing if he's holding that measure for measure hashem will be judging measure for measure because that's what it is so unfortunate could be the end of someone's life okay that's already too late to learn your lesson right in other words you spent your whole life doing good seemingly good kind acts and yet at the end of the life only god knows right he's the one who judges we're not judging we know the parameters i mean at least according to the rambam we think we know the parameters and therefore even to say that not to blaspheme god right that's one of the right and not to do idol worship if someone is already logically coming to these conclusions it's hard to believe that they're atheists they have some some intuition that there must be or at least they're suspecting they're suspicious concerned maybe there is a god because they're actually refraining from idol worship they're refraining from blaspheming hashem so it's hard to believe they're a total absolute atheist it's just in my mind based on what i know these seven laws are but if someone does come to the these conclusions based on logic alone the rambam puts him in the position where he is such a great guy he's not the greatest he's a great guy and he'll be blessed in this world whereas the one who has a spiritual inclination and is understanding torah is important the torah was given by god there's obviously it's a role for the jews that are playing there's some there's some aspect to their role that i have to honor as a non-jew or support the mission of the torah and therefore my reward will be different if i'm a gentile okay so i want to wish everybody right we're starting like this is like springtime right um it's a new year right really you know we're so so we're starting a fresh turning a new page in the tanakh in the in the in the homish and i hope that you will join us from this point onward um i do know that many of you i mean we're getting like hundreds 500 600 700 views on my on this particular video every week so put your comments you know don't be afraid right ask questions you have my email address it's on our website interact with us and when you come to jerusalem please feel free to join us in learning and we look forward to meeting you one day and all we can say is have a great summer and a great year and we look forward to speaking to you again [Music] is [Music]