Yaakov Portnoy: Not funny

I'm just I'm very nervous this is one of the reasons why I never do anything like this I'm very nervous about speaking in public I get all jittery all day got all nervous a shake like today for example I only had 10 meals today that was my that was my day because I was all nervous and what he didn't eat you know so much huh still there they're frozen he got way too nervous oh my internet connection was unstable it's okay we've all done this before I'm nervous yeah but I call my friend either way so last time cycle spoke he made a joke about being nervous and about a picture everyone into something and their underwear and he said something about how it's very simple because everyone's you know wearing underwear now they're not wearing any pants so I think I came up with a solution it's very simple for me you know in order to to get over the nervousness I'm just going to imagine everybody in Frankel's on the work sometime listen to me to be honest I think you all have an advantage over me I'll explain to you why because all I checked some of your social media every time you post a joke your your your crowd your audience is larger than what we have over here by me just the six of you you're six times larger than my social media presence so to be honest it's very nervous I'm not a stand-up comedian at all I'm more like the hey remember that but the thing you said two days ago I have a funny joke you know that's why that's why I like the washed out blue marks you know the check marks you know I keep them on red all day and then at the end of the day I say yeah sorry I had to get back to you so so soon here's a funny joke yeah I just read it for the first time I want to I wanted to talk about a little bit about the quarantine when we first started the quarantine I was actually very good my kids had a zum-zum school and their schedule was standard it was perfect because it was over I know our five kids all very entertaining and just you know sometimes it's helpful when they're not all around in the same room so it was staggered there was never more than two kids that worn in school so there's one kid in school - good you're playing weren't there very well it dawned on me that I'm gonna try to do that with their schedule so net first started I said when I wake up no more than three kids off at a time let's try that didn't work so well so I went down to two kids couple days later it didn't work so I said one kid at a time after that I decided you know forget it no more than my wife up with the kids that's what I said yeah you know speaking of quarantine I learned quite a bit over the over the quarantine to do that this morning Suki December then barks oh mama there's a there's a there's a meme there's a meme going around and it goes around every Friday I don't know if it stopped I haven't seen in a while but there's a mean that says you know remember to take out the looks up from your pajama pants I just want to walk you through the my thought process you know as the quarantine was going on with that out with that mean you know the first week I was like oh come on it's not nice it's choppiness you're gonna put on a suit so it's a pajama pants you know what are you talking about you put on the suit the first week the second week okay no snow so bad on your suit but I'm wearing dress pants and I'm not gonna put on the slippage on the pants that I have as it goes on third week I'm starting that's a joke you know during the week guy in pajamas the third week you know I probably it's nicer I put a shabbos pajamas so I had to make sure that most of thought their fourth week javis pajamas take pajamas and I'm wearing the same pajamas who cares by the fourth week already I was like pockets my boxers all their pockets right away you have any idea how much money I say that my water bill and you don't do laundry save a lot of money