Why Do So Many Celebrities Go Nuts???

One and fam, we are live. Thank you for joining us with another exciting episode of Kosher Videos. We are so excited to be here today. I have a guest. Woo! Famous Abby Grinstein. Thank you. Abby Grinstein, did you ever act in a Kosher Videos? Once or twice. Akiva doesn't really like my acting skills. What? Neither do I. Hey. But Abby Grinstein is a native of Miami and also he is a prominent member of the Yeshiva of Waterbury here in Durham, Connecticut and we are super excited Thank you. Yeah, we're going to discuss today's subject. Why do celebrities go nuts? Abby Grinstein, be honest with me straight up. Do you have a favorite celebrity? Yes or no? Uncle Mike. Ryan Reynolds is my Ryan Reynolds? Okay, I'm not exactly so sure who that is. I'm sure he's a good actor. My question for you is, did you ever Did you ever research his personal life? No. Okay. Do you want to do it right now? It's what I was about to do. Okay. Check it up on Wikipedia what his personal life is like. Do it on the spot. I never looked at it before. This is on the spot. Me neither. It's going to be interesting. All right. Personal life. Personal life. Go ahead. Um so, they announced their engagement in two June 2004. In February 2007, um they announced that they had mutually decided to end their engagement. Mhm. They married on September 27th, 2008. Uh-huh. Then on December 14th, 2010, they announced that they had separated. Reynolds filed for divorce in Los Angeles on December 23rd, 2010. And that's the end of the article? Well, then Reynolds had openly spoken about his lifelong struggle with anxiety, noting in 2018 that he carried out many interviews in the character of Deadpool to alleviate his fears. Uh-huh. So, here's the thing. Here's the problem. If you would take This is what I've discovered. I've discovered that if I Google search Wikipedia search, you know, my most famous guy that I know, I will discover a lot a lot of the times that this person has gone through multiple divorces. He is He has major issues with anxiety, depression, drugs, drinking, alcohol abuse. Sometimes the person's not alive anymore due to suicide. I've discovered this, okay? Multiple times. Um and we just did a random search of a person, and this was not bad This was even not even considered bad in the world of celebrity, but at the end of the day he did have three uh marriages and and also suffers from anxiety, which is crazy because here you are These are the people that we we look up to at the top of the food chain. This is the top of the top that our society looks towards, and it seems like the more top of the food chain you get to, the more messed up they are. And why should that be? Okay, now, in in case you think that this is just like a thing that randomly happens that we just checked on, you know, online for this person, you know, he's a little bit of whatever. I know it's for a fact I interviewed a while ago Ari Blau. We we actually made a podcast for kosher videos. We had to take it down cuz actually we had some issues from the actual Hollywood company that was not very happy about the whole whatever. So, we had to take it down. Can't Can't say too much, but um in it? Whatever. But I'll tell you some stuff that that was said. You know, we were talking about is that, you know, when he went to Hollywood, he was legit thinking, "Wow, here I am. I'm going to reach the top." And that was his goal, to get to the top of Hollywood. He got freaked out. He literally got freaked out. He saw this place as a walking insane asylum. The people here are not normal people. They're out of their minds. I'm not dealing with normal people. I'm dealing with babies. I'm dealing with selfish. I'm dealing with with jealous. And how did this stuff all come about? I'll give you some examples. I'm I'm not here to speak lashon hara about celebrities or whatever. Truth is that it's not lashon hara to speak about a guy. It's not It's not a halacha that it's not lashon hara. It's not good be might not be good cuz it's bad middos. But I'm sharing with you a good lesson, so I want you to know this. So it's it's not lashon hara. Um I'm going to give you a few examples that he told me on a personal one-to-one experience. Okay? He had this experience with them. He uh worked on James Corden show. He had experience with Ellen DeGeneres. Okay? Ellen DeGeneres Okay? Right? A lot of people know Ellen show. She's very very famous woman. He said that when she came, they came around her crew came around. They warned the people that working in the crew. They warned all the people, "If you look Ellen in the eyes, we will stop the show, and she's going to walk out." Now, in case you're thinking, "Oh like yeah, well yeah, maybe she needs to focus or something." No no no no no no no. That is a totally nutso crazy thing because these people are trying to help her. These I know Ari is telling me he's he he works there. He they they they have to do different jobs. They I don't know what it is. Set up the lighting or the mics on. Make sure that her sound has a good It's not a normal thing to not be able to look at somebody in the eye when you're talking to them. It's totally totally totally nutso. He told me. He told me it's the weirdest thing. He's like he felt like like like they're treating him like garbage. He's like It's like the weirdest thing. Like they're coming in like telling you, "We're going to leave." Like who do you think you are? Like It was the weirdest weirdest thing. Another example. I believe it was Taylor Swift. I don't know. Honestly, I don't follow uh this type of music and stuff. And I I don't know if I'm getting the name right either. Sorry, correction. The name of the singer is Britney Spears. that a lot of people look up to. And um she was on a program called Carpool Karaoke. And this program, a lot of people think it's like it looks like a very jokey, like on the on the spur of the moment thing. They actually spend millions and millions of dollars in it. Number one, for the rights to get the music to play the music on Car- Carpool Karaoke, they have to pay the artist, whatever. And they also have 11 cars, and it's a whole production, and he personally spent tons and tons of time trying to make it successful in the setup. She comes, she puts on the stuff, she's like, "Everything's ready to go." She turns them, and she says, "Sorry, guys. I'm not doing this. I'm not in the mood." The whole place is just like, "What?" Like, there's literally like a million dollars like on I think he said it was close to a million like on that day or something. I forgot the exact amounts. I It was a long time ago this when when he we did this interview. He could And by the way, she said that they she ripped off her mic pack, but the mic was still attached, so he was hearing what she was saying. Literally like like babyish, like, "No. No, we're not doing." And they had to literally sit there like trying to convince her like a little like "Oh, come on. It's going to be so No, I'm not in the mood. I don't want to." Like, you know, like he's he made it he portrayed it like it was like the most babyish thing that ever happened. It's just like you couldn't believe it. And finally, they convinced her. She said, "Okay, fine. I'll do it." And you know, she put it back on and did it. And it was it was the vibes were just there. It was like everybody was just like, "Ew." Like, you know? So, and and then he said, you know, there's a there's a band called One Direction. It came. And um, these these are teenagers. They order like I forgot how many pies of pizza, like 40 crazy amounts of pizzas of pizza pies for no reason. Like like they ate like a slice or whatever. They made it I think he went to like a special pizza shop that they wanted it from or something. And they they ate like two It was just a a weird thing. The point is there's a very funny thing that's going on over here. You're reaching the top of the food chain which our whole society is looking towards, and these are people that work hard. they're not lazy people, and these are people that have you know, they portray at least that they have good morals and they're going out of their minds. If you go into the internals of Hollywood, you will know it is an insane asylum. It is not a normal place to be. You you you can go insane there. The whole system is just wreck. It's just crazy, crazy stuff going on there. Not to say by the way that there is nobody there that is that is a nice guy. He did tell me that there was a person his name is Tom Hanks and he was a nice he was he he he he viewed him as a nice person but he was like the only maybe one of the only people um and um but but rub-a-dub-a majority of the majority of the people that he's met and interacted with and the situations and the babyishness and the and it's it's just mind-boggling. Why? Why do you go nuts when you go Why should it be These are people that have talents and trying to entertain people and I'm telling you that they mean good a lot a lot a lot of the people there mean good and they get caught up in the system and they go nuts. Good people and they're not like extrovert not all of them are extrovert like crazy like look at me look at me. Some people are like not look at me but they have like something that they want to express and they actually have some good lesson they want to express and they go out there they put themselves out there and all of a sudden they go nuts so what is going on? Why should it be like that? What did he do in Hollywood? Um he was one of the production I think assistants. He was getting up there. He was working his way to the top. He was um yeah he and he was told of this? He was told like you could be big stuff here. When he left they gave him a whole speech like you could be big stuff here you're giving up crazy stuff cuz cuz you're getting big and he got well yeah he was he yeah he well he started becoming firmer and firmer and realizing the purpose of life but he would have stayed. He he he just couldn't have he's just this this not a normal place. Right. Like I'm going to go crazy soon, you know what I mean? So why is this so? Um so here I have a question. Yeah. Um so if you look at it Mhm. Um is that most people in society has at some point, you know, done drugs or, you know, been to gotten arrested, you know, did some bad stuff, let's say. Mhm. Um so like, you know, I feel like most people have gotten, you know, in some sort of trouble, done something. Bobby, I agree with you 100%. We have a major, major issue with drugs in our society, and you're right, divorces are out of control these days, and anxieties and depressions and and just our society has a lot a lot of issues. Here's the problem though, here's the what I'm trying to say though. This is what's weird. I could understand that if you're dealing with the lower class, you you know, the middle class, yeah, you're right, in the in the in the hood, you know, they got a lot of issues with tons of bad drugs and and but even the middle class, okay, it's seeping in. But here's the problem, these people we're dealing with are the highest are the highest class. They should be the most functioning people. The they you know, they they work hard, they're celebrities, they're rich, they're up there, they're respected, they're on the top of the food chain, and yet it seems that the higher to the food chain you get, the more nuts they go crazy and they lose their minds. Why is that so? Everyone wants a purpose, cuz if you don't have a purpose in life, that's where a lot of, you know, drugs and depression and all that comes from, because you know, so you know, I'm just like, what am I supposed to do? So they use whatever they're doing, singing, acting, whatever it is, they're using this to get their meaning. They say, now I have a purpose, I'm going to act. Then they reach the top and they're like, oh shoot, I still feel like I don't have a purpose, cuz I reached the top, I'm I'm as wealthy as could be. Now what? You know. Uh-huh. Now I have the next 50 years to Okay. I agree with you 100% and I think that that's the case in many but I do see that there are some very big actors and actors who I think that are not there for the fame and are not necessarily trying to to fill the void or whatever. A lot of introverts, a lot of introverts that are not, you know, you know, looking for fame or love or big stuff. And you might tell me that they're lazy people. They're looking to just get a lot of money and be lazy. That's not true. That's one thing that's that I believe is a total myth basically. I think that maybe 0.0001 of actors celebrities are lazy people or are good-for-nothings and do nothings. That's absolutely not the case. If you do any research on these people, these these people work their brains off to get where they were. Any CEO almost if you really study their lives, if you study celebrities and I have I have looked at many Wikipedias cuz I love studying the subject. And if you look at the at the lives of these people and how they develop, these people worked their brains out to get where they were. They have they pushed and they sweated and they stayed in rooms to to act their parts perfectly and to do their you know, they gave it their all and I I really think that's the case. I really think that these people work crazy crazy hard. They are not lazy people. And not all of them I don't think are necessarily putting on an act or chasing after something which is not them. I think that there are many celebrities that are chasing who they are. That's who they are. The guy's an actor. He's a singer. That's his talent and that's what he should be doing. So, the question is why is he going nuts? There are some people that are meant to be good singers and should sing in public. Why should they have to go nuts when they sing in public? And there are people that should be good actors and just like there are people that are very good plumbers and there's good talented people that are good at sports, and that's probably what their mission in life is. I mean, if you ask me what it was Michael Jordan's mission in life, I would actually probably say he should have been a basketball player because that's his mission. He should teach good lessons with it, and he should teach good stuff, and you know, but that's his, you know, that's that was his that that could be why why Hashem created these people. They have certain talents, and they found themselves, and I I I don't think that necessarily that this is not who they are. It could be, you know, it it it would seem that a lot of these people have these type of talents, and if used for the right purpose, and some of them I think really did try to use it for the right purposes. Yet, we still find that a lot of them go nuts. And why should that be so? Why should it be that a person who's a plumber, you know, works with his talents of being a plumber, and he doesn't go nuts? And then you have a celebrity that works with his talents of being a celebrity and and trying to do for everybody whatever he can and to, you know, bring to the table entertainment. Yet, we still see that for some reason this job and this talent almost like requires you to eventually lose your brain. And why should it be so? Why should it be fair? How could this maybe be prevented or if it could or, you know, where is where does this all stem from? So, I agree First of all, I agree with what you said. Mhm. You know, first of all, you could develop negative character traits just from, you know, when they when they get their fans. The fans just from having, you know, people swarming over you and dying to, you know, get get your signature. First of all, that causes, you know, arrogance. First which could also from arrogance could stem a lot of other negative traits. Mhm. And um Yeah. So, I I have a definitive answer, and I don't I don't have like an answer to this whole situation. Um I do have a brainstorm that just came to me this week, and I thought of it. And the reason why I thought of it is because there was when I was a kid, there was a very, very famous singer, and I have this habit that whenever I think of like a, you know, somebody famous, I try to Wikipedia and see what they're what's going on with them just to prove this point. And just recently, about 2 days ago, I I you know, I Googled this this singer. I don't I don't even know his name. I forgot. It's from a famous song. And I see that the guy's not alive anymore. He hung himself, okay? 2 years ago, the guy hung himself. And I could not I'm just like, this is wild. This guy looked like a great, famous guy. Looked like a nice guy. Like I I've heard him talk and like he I mean, he looks like Yeah, I've seen him singing on this and that and like he looked like a great guy. And like, what's the How did he go nuts? How did he do that to himself? Why did he go crazy? And what I came out with is this thought. Okay, I'm not solving the whole problem, but I'm going to give you this thought. The thought that I had is that the higher you get on the food chain, the lonelier you become. What looks like you're becoming connected to more and more people, you're actually becoming isolated from the entire world. The higher and the bigger of a celebrity that you become, the more of the separation there is between you and people. And even people not It's not their fault. It's not the fans' fault, and it's not the people's fault. They don't know how to relate to you anymore. They They They view you as somebody different than them, and they're not sure how to relate. A lot of time, they're not even relating to you anymore. They're relating to your good looks or your good act acting skills or singing skills or your talents, which is totally, totally not you. They're not relating to you. Nobody knows you anymore. And you start getting stuck in this bubble where nobody gets me. Nobody gets me. And you could sing about it, and you could And you're singing like, "Nobody loves me." I don't know, you know. And And it's not helping. It's not helping. The more he does that, the more they don't love him really because the it keeps He be The famouser and the more different and the more money you you become just by default, the more separate you become from your friends, from your family, from your fans. And people are not relating They don't know They're not sure how to relate to you, and they're also not relating to you. They're relating to your money, your fame, your this and that. And you get stuck in this very deep, sad, lonely bubble. It's almost like imagine for 1 second that you were that Imagine for 1 second you know there's there's a famous Twilight Zone, you know. You're the There's an explosion. A guy was in a bank safe. You know, you you were in a bank safe, and all of a sudden there's an explosion. You wake up, you open the bank safe, you're the only person that lived. There's a nuclear explosion, and nobody in the world is alive. Imagine Imagine how scary and depressing Like you have no one to share anything with. Almost everything you do it I I could I I think I could safely say, by the way, everything you could do. I think I could say that cuz our whole point our whole existence in this world is to expand, to share, to become bigger. That's your whole your whole existence. That's why you're here. And imagine for a second that there's no one to share with. Any experience you have doesn't really make a difference cuz nobody's going to know about it. There's no way to connect that to a bigger existence or to somebody else or, you know, to to expand that. And it's just alone. Everything. Nothing makes a difference. There's nobody to share. It's the most depressing, saddest feeling, right? So, here you are. You have a celebrity. He's all the way at the top. And what he was deeply looking for the whole time, deeply is really connection, right? Love, creating and sharing it with people, but while doing so, what's going on is that a certain separation starts to, you know, to exist in our society and people start to relate to him for his good looks, for his cover, for his talents, for his singing abilities, for his acting abilities and all of a sudden he feels like, oh my gosh, like nobody get nobody knows me, nobody cares about me. They just care about my cars, about my money, about my fame, about my voice, about this. They don't even know who I am. Nobody gets me. Nobody gets me. My even my family like doesn't get me anymore. Like they don't know what I'm going through and they're and it's very and he has nobody in his life that he feels he could share that with and the more fans and friends he gets and the more they like see they're like shouting like, "Justin Bieber!" Like what he really hears is like the you know, what you what me and you hear is, "Justin, we love you!" And what he hears is like, "Justin, we have no idea who you are and we hate you! Like we love your good looks. We love your voice." And he's just like imagine just hearing that on on repeat, you know, like, "Justin, we love your cars. We love your good looks. We love your voice." And you're like, "But wait a second, do you guys know who I am? Do you know who I really am? the values I have, the connections that I want to make, what I'm all about, how I want to become a better person, I want to make this world a a better a bigger place and stuff like that?" And that was just a thought that was just a thought that I had that the higher in the food chain that you get and the more separation is it that there's a certain creepy, crazy loneliness. And as of now I'm not getting I'm not saying like an AIDS uh I didn't brainstorm, you know, what the AIDS is. I don't I don't know if I have one. I'm not sure. But but yes, I agree with you that there's a lot of fakeness going on like what you said before that there's a lot of fakeness. There's a lot of COVID going on. There's a lot of acting who you're not. That's true. But but you know, something that I think really helped me solve this puzzle was another factor and that is that there's a lot of loneliness of of oh my gosh, like there is nobody in the world that is getting me. You understand? And and and the more he tries to get that, the further it becomes from him. The more famous and more famous he's trying to become so more and more people could know who he is, the more and more people are not relating to who he is, they're relating to his externals and to his to his not or they just don't know how to relate then he's not getting real connections with people. He's just getting like fake um you know, people that are love him. Um and that that's that's that's what I think. And what do we take home from all this? This is what I'm going to say about it. Okay? I'm listening. You know, again, I'm just random guy just thinking random thoughts, but maybe it'll be helpful for you and you'll be able to use this. And that is when you start life, don't just start going on a path a random path that society looks as big or like the bigger the better and everything. Decide who am I really? What am I after life? What are my deepest desires? What am I made out of? Okay? And what you'll discover in some form or not is that what you're made out of is relationships. You it's 100% sure. There's nobody that can argue out with me on this. If if you want to argue, call me up. We'll have I'll discuss it with you. You're made out of someone that wants to be part of someone else's life of other people's life and you want them to be part of your life. You want to expand. You want to infuse yourself with others and become bigger and share your life experience with other You want other people to get you and you to get other people, to share their to get their wisdom, for them to have your wisdom. You have your experiences and you're stuck with that. But when you expand and you share with other people, you start seeing a different world. You're stuck in your own world. The only way you can see somebody else's world is when you expand, when you have relationships. You start seeing new worlds. And that's what we're all really deeply looking at. And to get in touch with that and see how you can play that out in your life. Everybody's got different tools. You know what I'm saying? These celebrities or these singers, whatever, they all got tools, special tools and talented tools. And I honestly think that they should be using them for for their acting and for and they could portray great lessons and great things. However, what I'm going to say is that they should realize that what they're after in this whole big picture is actually true and deep connections. And to keep that in mind. And not just to be like, "Oh, the goal in life is social media, king. Is to have the most fans and the most covered and the most and tons of things." And when you keep chasing after that covered and all of that falseness, which is really not connection at all, it's connecting to what you're not. It's loving them loving your car and your money and stuff, right? When you keep doing that, you're going to be left with who you're not. You're going to be left with zero relationship. What you are is looking to expand, looking to become bigger. So, if Akiva Balsam would be able to make a suggestion for Hollywood, my suggestion is to work slower. To work slowly. To sit down and think, "What's this about?" Don't just see, "Oh my gosh, wow, that looks cool. He has 1 million followers on YouTube. I want to be like him. Yeah, like get crowds riled up chanting your name. That's what life's about." That's not what you're after. You're after people that will really connect to you and have real true relationships. And you have talents that you want, you know, to to to give to the world. So, while you're building it up, work a little bit slower. Don't try chasing. Maybe it's time to step back when it gets a little too big. Um and but always, no matter what, make sure you have your crew of real tight close-knit family family, friends, wife family, children, connections. That's the icker. Those are the icker. That's where your relationships, you build yourself off, you build who you are off of. And then you try expanding that slowly but surely to the world and try teaching who you are and try seeing other people's lives and stuff. But when you just aim for numbers and try to get like billions of people to all chat your you know numbers, you lose the quality. You're going after quantity, you lose the whole quality of it and it becomes like a goal in of itself just to get tons of people chanting your name. After while, you're going to be realizing this is all nothing. Like, I have zero real relationships. That's what I have. I have a billion zeros. I have a billion zeros. I got a billion fans, but a billion zeros because none of them have relationships and none of them is is a real, you know, a real I'm gaining, you're gaining, they know me, I know them, you know, seeing different worlds. None of that. So, that's my suggestion for Hollywood. I don't know if that makes sense, but it's a lesson definitely for all of us. Connections is icker. When you disconnect yourself from people, when you have nothing is when you have fake-ness and you're just making famous uh goal in it of itself to become famous, to become the top of the world or whatever and it becomes a goal in it of itself. It's empty. There's nothing in there. There's no relationships and you end up feeling alone. Alone, nothing. You You end up feeling alone and disconnected and it's very very depressing. So, get in touch. Meditate. Sit there in the mornings. Sit there and for me, meditation is the most powerful tool that I had that I use. Try to do it. please close your eyes. Listen to the sounds. Yeah, maybe we'll do it a different maybe we'll do it a different podcast. Meditation is so important. You get in touch with who am I? What is my self-esteem? And you sit there and you breathe to it. I am who I am for another. That's who I am. I am relationships. I am a builder. I love to build. I love to create. I am an avid asha. That's who I am. And you build your self-esteem and you build your relationships. And then when you build a true who am I and who my mission is and what I'm all about relationships. And you take your talents and then you use them with that esteem, with your crew, with your your the people who support you and your family and your friends and your relationships. And you use that to cause more deep meaningful relationships. Not just empty people shouting your name and saying we like your face and your good looks. No. People that really want to connect to your world and you want to connect to to their world. Work a little bit slower. It's not so much about quantity. Quality. You will find yourself fulfilling your life mission and having a very very happy life. That is what I have to say today. Abby, do you have any words? Yeah. Um I need to say thank you for helping me Mhm. because my dream has been to go to Hollywood. Is that right? Yes. Now now I know what to do to Can I not go crazy. Can I be honest with you? I'm so glad you shared with me. You know, now that we're putting it out there, I'll be very honest with you. My I have this dream that like one day and by the way, I would never go to Hollywood. My dream is that they come to me. I've had this all the time and I'm sure many people have like my dream is I want to become a God la dar, but Hollywood's going to knock on the God lovers' door one day and say, "Yo, you are like just so cool and amazing. We need you to act in a movie." I'm like, "Oh, you give out kosher meals." And they're like, "Please, like we beg you. We need you to mentor God, dude. You're You're like, "We'll pay you millions." I'm like, "Sorry, I can't do it, Chavez." "We'll we'll we'll change the whole script. Like we'll work around you. We won't work on Chavez." change the whole Hollywood. And then I come to Hollywood and I'm going to give like here of Sheeran and like You could be my co-host, Ellen DeGeneres. Yeah, yeah. We'll be my co-host. Then we'll have Sheeran there. People will be staying And then all the movies are going to start portraying like crazy good lessons and it'll end up changing the world. And then Messiah's going to come. just wants to take over Hollywood and make it into kosher business. Exactly. Kosher business, yeah. And And cuz you Do you know how powerful a movie is? Do you know how powerful a movie is? Do you know how many lives have been changed? Do you know how much of our lives and people that have watched movies when they're kids? How much of your lives are based your dreams and your aspirations have been based off the cuz the power of pictures? Okay. Well, anyways, thank you so much for joining us today. I hope you enjoyed and I hope you got learn some good lessons. a pleasure. Stay tuned for the next podcast and don't forget to subscribe and like it up and share it with all your friends, family, relatives, and people who you want to change their lives. Thank you so much for joining and stay tuned for the next Subscribe. Hey friend. Hey stranger, what's your name? Come on and walk with me. I'll take you on this journey. And then we'll go home.