When Your Child Is Having Difficulties In School - By Rabbi YY Jacobson

good morning everybody I'm a good good venture Maxie the vicinity rush i'ma tell them suck it to all of you and your families your mush volume your students your pupils your disciples your children to children under your care in addition of course to your own loved ones they tell an anecdote about a rabbi who would always give sermons about the need to be sensitive empathetic loving towards children one day they were paving his driveway and you know when children see fresh pavement you remember when you were children they like to leave a mark in this world they like to leave their imprint on God's planet they right away started to dance hock office on his new pavement tattooing engraving various messages name slogans ideas and the rabbi saw this he comes out to the porch and he begins hollering the top of his lungs you're a bunch of spoiled ratty horrible kids you're the worst of the worst chastising them giving them very very intense Musa screaming his wife hears her husband's screaming so she comes out and she sees what's going on he's screaming at a bunch of terrified kids and she looks at him she says first I'd the nation' I don't understand you every Shabbos you speak so eloquently about the art of discipline the art of Education how to affect children in a positive and nurturing and powerful way while slice them what are you screaming at them and hollering at them and he says listen I love children in the abstract not in the concrete [Music] very often theorists on education speak in the abstract and in the abstract everything is always perfect and beautiful the challenge is always towards rested in the concrete just like in any other art of life they say there was once a a bigger of what was to consider himself own mokuba who came to a particular community in New York and a couple came to see him unfortunately they were infertile they couldn't have children they asked him for a profit davin for them and he said I'm going back there too strong give me your names put it on a settler whittle and I'm gonna go to the clay Salama Ravi and I'm gonna put it in and I'm gonna dab him for you there they give him their names and their mothers names wonderful he leaves he comes back five years later to the same town he's walking in this street and he sees the lady who came to him five years ago and he says hi how have you been have there been positive developments she says up how you do my Schanke terrifically Ivanka's Deborah Hashem our home is graced with ten children he looks at her I've been at five years ago ten children it's a little fast I mean I know there's a concept called fits Assad era and Jewish mothers are super women I mean we all know that especially on this side but but to me it's a little fast so she says listen we didn't waste any time the first year I had triplets borussia the next year had twins then we just started we need a little break so we took a little break and then again we are twins we are triplets thank God we have a minyan of children in our home and the rabbi's starts celebrating shutting y'all no Vicki no Vicki no is Monas that's the best news it's awesome unbelievable where's your husband I want to give him a big hug given my Mazel Tov my husband is out of town where is he went to show what suppose business relatives went to your show I why he went to the coast so why he's looking for the note he wants to take it out he wants to take had enough so you know you know their children I don't have to explain this to the scylla the greatest blessing in the world there's no blessing like the blessing of children but they also come with a set of challenges somehow everything in this world comes with a manual you buy a stupid telephone then you have a manual of 400 pages you buy a vacuum cleaner comes with a manual you get a car for short come with a manual you get a tablecloth or a little watch it comes with a manual at least 40 pages with instructions somehow the most important thing in the world imagine if every child that was born came with an operator's manual your boyish leland would say hey this is what this girl needs this is what this boy needs this you stay away from this will not work on this child I guess it worked on the old one it's not gonna somehow we gotta figure it out by trial and error good luck but there's no manual but Santa's not the greatest blessing and as every great blessing that comes also with a profound challenge and sometimes profound headaches and migraines as I eat he needed a home he saw him the 13th Avenue somebody was renting out the picks used me the top floor of the home so he comes he says I want a lease it's for two years Manchester's a condition condition is stuff I misspoke on kinder family with our children you could just put your cell phones on vibrate I'm a DD so I get mixed up you could just put your cell phones on vibrate I would appreciate it and also when you do therapy on kids put your phones on vibrate so first it says Voss Epis he says listen I'm an older man my wife is an older lady we go to sleep 8:30 we can deal with Brooklyn Jewish children it was tons enough the kept a gun so knock they dance on your heads all night we want quiet you want to move upstairs goes on to hate about a couple on kinder he says good that fits the bill they sign a contract everybody's happy first night the couple goes to sleep 8:30 they're looking forward Bikash yakovleva Shalva cuff 'it's all off suddenly they aim at paleness miss pink not ten minutes four hours finally 12:30 a.m. the couple can fall asleep the man runs upstairs and he sees 14 children of course under the age of 14 cane yearbook may tans that moving the furniture they're hollering they're jumping and they're just beginning the night the landlord looks at the tenant and he says lumbering me Sonny why'd you lie to me why did you deceive him he says I didn't lie to you he said we made up on Miss Parker on kinder he says the CICC in there that's our highest and I told you these are enemies some of us grew up in certain schools with certain classes where we were commonly identified by those titles I once had a teacher who did not get a PhD in pedagogy let's put it that way who once told us he says I'm much greater than the morale of proud morale had one go along I have 19 good moms and he said that my rounds going on couldn't speak my going long know how to speak and this is where I have my self-confidence from this is what boosted my ego and made me feel as a valuable set of citizen and a special person but this was very very common language behind this highest kotzen mission going crazy kids and kids it took a couple of decades and a lot of pain and a lot of trauma and a lot of hurt for people to start discovering that somehow this is not essential to Judaism somehow Judaism doesn't believe in negativity and only negativity traumatizing and scaring the living daylights and in denigrating people in denigrating the most cherished members of society the future of God's world the Gemara says in Shabbos lttb machinery a little tinnitus show based on mushy clay my little mushy us my little anointed ones and I once was talking to educators and I said what's the meaning of mushy high when you were a children every child when they grow up they have a little dream of making a big difference in the world you're small you fantasize the sky is the limit every Jewish child has a dream of either being machine or bringing machine or doing something equivalent but usually when we grow up we become a little jaded we become a little cynical so that the Gemara el tigre bit machine in Eilat initial base Yama never ever kill the little machine you never kill the child in you always remain hold on to that innocence to that optimism to that confidence that you could change the world don't stifle don't eradicate don't obliterate that spark of life that spark of joy of optimism within yourself and when you can doTERRA SH the child within yourself you can share --is-- uniquely the child that you're dealing with a few days of bearish on an interesting thing reshawna celebrate the anniversary of creation the world everything hi Owen hi Roz hello today is the birthday of the world's air higher in Hamas Hamas and we say Musa from the modern era shoshanna's of Zions aramis massages he currently ambition Iran says the world was created a few days earlier but other than how they were created and they're the crown jewel of creation the human being it's a recap of silicon is mark you open up that Korea shattered of Rosh Hashana what would if you had to institute what we should read a militia Shana what would you Institute what pay stuff you read the story of pacer yeah kaneki you read about Hanukkah sufficiently put him you read about a Moloch tsch above you read about Gauss shrew asuka's you read about the parties of Yom Tov you Kippur you read the parts of him keep our hairy mice what should you read Rosh Hashanah practice malicious by you relic in Masada but psalm of isolation mine words or thoughts rom by eight possible punishments kaya me created other me created this we're celebrating our um our soil in the creation of the world there's knows a pair of it degrees operator not episode he softened their step as I'm after what do you read under she's Shana both days about children and both of terrorists all about soldier the first day of creates a tiger you learn about Sora's yearning to have a child about Hager is having a child about the faith of each small the faith of youths of the second day you learn about of Rama needs of al Ghul AME act of the half period of the first days Hana yearning for small laugh third of the second a soccer team of hazard no right I was cool excited a bein yeah clearly afraid in yellow Josh Reem comida is off me boy huh mume I'll or America may okay mama may I Laurie Rock America men who knew Michelle and he explained this the answer is because with this Korea cetera the Hazael all the way back from the earlier generations were demonstrating that from the Jewish perspective how do you celebrate the world hady celebrate humanity how do you celebrate civilization only one way by focusing on the children on the child or as the pond overture everyone said children with our parents are orphans but parents who don't know had arranged their children he said orphaned children are children without parents an orphan generation is a generation of parents or educators who don't know how to reach their children so Rosh Hashanah when we celebrate the entire planet and the entire universe and the entire cosmos another macabre Mephisto's nimrod immunity lee how does it happen by tuning in to the story of a few mothers yearning to be able to have a child to raise a child to be there for a child by focusing on hashem listening to the coil on our bashar who's shown the voice of the child thirsty for nourishment and for nurture and of roaming it's hook walking together a hundred years apart but vile who Shanaya be active says twice they walk both of them walked together yacht of intimacy unison closeness connection the gomorrah says i'm a sceptic a Duchenne tough tough tests one of the obligations of a father what are their obligations of a father to the father as a few obligations huh of Chi of the binoy l'amour lawyer to make sure he has a bris lived though you saw you if he's a coin I'm sorry if he's a part of first board he has to relive eight him from the client there's something else well I'm the tailor to teach him turn there's another obligation not so popular today alumni ominous gotta teach him a job you have to teach them to have a trait another one this are you sure you had to help him find a spouse the yeah show him our flesh should I buy mine you have to teach him how to swim teacher medicine well from everything in the world I'm gonna teach him how to swell the area and the gomera brings call me shiny melambe illness alumni listeners if you don't teach them a job you don't teach them how to hold a job you're teaching him to become a thief what are we these examples my friends I see these not only as the specific description the damara says but also as symbolic of the role of educators fathers and mothers teachers and in our case celebrated and wonderful therapists the first thing the parent educator gives the child is a bris a bris is identity who are you a bris is the covenant of every Jewish boy and as the Gemara says Esau commanded me in the dummy sound like a woman is not in the covenant she's just naturally part of the covenant she doesn't have to go through a bris physically as the Gomorrah says in a very desire but the bursting is identity who are you the briefs represents you're part of a family a part of a covenant you're part of a people you're part of a nation identity to know who you are or as the cops carry everyone said I be spin this well do bees dune du bist du Vallon finish finish the station do business do a business well let's finish and do miss Duval do please do beneath him do please do you got it okay if I stayed in the skinny dish the face was in the shade okay I'll translate you father didn't teach you dish taught you how to swim he told you to get a job I say wow that's already makes you unique you should call them and say thank you the cuts kept aside like this if I am I because you are you and you are you because I am I then I am I and then I am NOT I and you are not you but if I am I because I am I and you are you because you are you and I am i and you are you and now we can begin to smooth identity all people are born originals yet many of us die as copies the British represents who you are will you come from the father's also obligated lives do so to redeem the child what does this mean to teach a child that you never stuck you're never a victim you may have challenges you may have a disability some things may be harder for you but your life is not a life of victimhood your life has infinite potential and dignity if you could fulfill the mission for which you were created that's the second obligation of a father and a parent and an educator and a therapist the third one is palmitoyl values what is right what is wrong teach the child the boy of the girl morals values the next is help him or her find a spouse which of course means married but it also means help the person show them how they could become a contributing member of society he may not neatly Neely but sunny lots me Marni of course there's no way and position where you are challenged to be a giver as in the case of marriage and finally says we got to teach the child had a swim was shooted by my man dismiss Emma says what that means is symbolically is this world is a tsunami it's very easy to drown to be able to give a child the confidence that you could swim you could navigate the waves you can keep your head above water not because there's no water and not because there are no heavy waves and not because there are no heavy tsunamis but because you have the power you have the resources to be able to swim and in many ways that is probably one of the great descriptions of your role in your job every single day when you meet those children those precious children under your care identity you're not stuck your life has purpose and there are values you could become a giver not only a taker and all the waves in the world all the tsunamis in the world can't drown you because you have the power to overcome them I want to share with you a story when I heard the story as a yeshiva Booker had made a very deep impact on me a classmate of money a Shiva was having a birthday made a little birthday party he brought a relative of his to speak and the relative shared a story he once visited a yeshiva yeshiva in Brooklyn it was a very competitive high level competitively she and there was a boy who came over to speak there and the boy told them he has a struggle his IQ is low it's hard for him to get things he sits in yeshiva at kretchner Bank and there's a challenge he has a Karissa cover rusev finishes in an hour takes in a week a page of Gomorrah on Amador a blogger Marco Bruce it does in an hour it takes him a week and even then he has to review and review it a hundred times and he knows it and could still review it many times and he feels frustrated and he went to one of the people in the yeshiva one of the staff members and he said it's not fair I want to be a godel I want to be a great person I want to be a Shaolin I want to be a perfect I want to be govern I'll never be because I'll never be much less and learning so this staff member Towson listen every god--all needs talmidim because the meat animal you kind of build them if there's no economy can have big people no small people he need students you'll be one of the students there's not fair it's not fair she goes to another staff member and other staff member agresa the cousin says the doyle of need money somebody got to support that you'll go you'll make money you'll support it just long amigo I want to be the double I don't want to be the support I don't want to be the knob slap I want to be the goggle he went to a third guy in the yeshiva my fears and the guy says it's probably a punishment for sins you did in a previous reincarnation you know we Varsham live in a place where everybody knows why other people suffer given Gulen sneers internet this every it's always the women by the way always the women always there with muscle the women don't speak up love is and it would be the men men get to speak they blame the women anyway so this mark here tells them probably in a previous gilgul you sinned and this is the punishment that you can be a goggle but the good news is next time around you'll be a god so this boy tells this he told me this is crazy place you're made to feel like a loser and they're told listen you gotta have some losers in society because if not they're no winners everybody's a winner and then there's no winners right nobody is rich no rich you gotta have losers so some people could feel like winners this is a beautiful religion isn't it inspire it says this is a corrupt this is a corrupt idea if this is what God believes in I have no connection to this smart kick so this year this year must be a Masonic sock loogied he says it's an interest in Schuyler you have takes you a week to learn and on with Gemara your friends learned it in an hour two hours at least they think they do they'll become video of them you feel like mama shenana quit and you feel like you don't belong you want to be a gobble so you suggested to him that he should share his dilemmas with the Lubavitcher ever he was a literature boffin he thought it's good an objective voice not from your circles so the boy wrote a whole edited Alabama cheer ever and he wrote the whole story I want to be a gobble I want to be a Muslim I went to this one he tells me that God will need students this one says that God will needs money this one says it's for previous go Gulen I decided to quit you achieve I don't want this whole thing only saying that this is ridiculous but somebody who seems intelligence and adjusted that should ask you some ask so the bouncer never wrote this buck a whole Lance a whole beautiful beautiful letter I'm going to tell you one inside he wrote to this boy because I think it captures such a fundamental idea in Hasek offer when it comes to Thanos especially when it comes to your work as therapists he wrote to this boy as follows the Mishna says in kedusha unnie near a solution which is clearly I was created to serve Russia every person was created to serve Russia the Gemara also says LIBOR occurred is borrowed over a hot lava tawa nothing is wasted the Gemara also says a Nima Vikash anacondas burrow for Bobby jr. embryo so any evaporation I ask of you what you could do every person that means was created to serve Hashem but no two people were created alike the Mishna says a son had an aim day a saying service no two people are alike you know even if you have twins they're not alike that means Hashem doesn't want any two people to serve him in the same way if he would he would have created them the same way no two people are alike it means every person has a different way in which he serves a shot it also means that our Shem gave you gave every person the exact amount of closest faculties talents and resources he or she needs to serve Him in the way of someone's this child to serve he didn't give the person extra because if he gave him extra they're wasted and they also didn't give the person anything less then exactly what they need to serve Him the way I said once this person should serve like parties lilius forgave you more then there's no purpose to them and there's nothing about Allah forgave you less it's not fair said even a human manufacturer a human creator imagine your maker stand there you build a stand there and then they can't hold a book you build a table and it collapses you build the chair the first time you sit down on it it collapses you don't know what you're doing you fill in a cavity and it's not full even a human person will create something you created in a way that it could fulfill its purpose you say Roberta's shallow them created us so on a can't fulfill its purpose doesn't make sense so you have exactly what you need to fulfill you sure this is not more not less and every person is different therefore every person has different qualities different challenges different blessings different backgrounds different journey different life story this is mind different psyche different brain to finish on and here it comes to the last sentence the punchline and when you use your Curtis that Hashem gave you to serve him the way he wants you to serve him a marshalling the aim of huh God Allah my Lamesa you can be more perfect and you can be a greater Gundel now I know what does this means tired Aidan is the episode bottle there I just need fire I'm a graphic guy Sabu tulips are butovo sets it's Elsa a bottle I'm just a visual fellow yushik oh yeah you should call yeah you should call yeah a cause can start bringing while you're at it for the same price a gross and dying yeah tired to eat entirely eaten here with the more water where's the more water the more water in the cup or there's more water in the bottle the men won't know what about the ladies very good I knew the ladies would know you see why don't worry don't worry don't lemonade students women need husbands to support them don't feel so bad just a joke just a joke everybody understands you don't have to be a rocket scientist to even have a master's in educational psychology to know that there is much more water in the bottle then there is the cup but take a look again and you'll see the cup is full and full filled the body has much more water but it's not full and it's not fulfilled what was the challenge why could nobody tell this to this boy and I'll tell you what I think for many of us what happens is yiddish kite becomes a model a box this is called perfection this is called godless i can't fit into that box even if I try 70 years it's not gonna happen my boy called me from your Shiva so I said we gate this how's it going he says I like it I say tell me the Shiva has a box everybody has to fit into the box he says absolutely yes it happens to be that naturally I and shaped according to their box he says born a person naturally I'm shaped according to their box if snare Cutler's upside receiver of Lakewood the smudges giveaway of Lakewood once sent that you have Maestas he said it's like there's a pretty sharp part the Gemara says cuz I'll say that is dumb they had one bed and one bed size same size for everybody what if a person was too short for the bed they scratched him out to leaf fit the bed what if he was too long they mutilated him sigh ones had to speak to somebody who was dealing with this situation I said you know sometimes I feel that I'm isit has also a different configuration moisted is the same is just like this dying sometimes it's the same thing that's what it's a bed for everybody no individuality who ever heard of such a thing whoever it systems are here for people people are not here for systems Leela how called Passover hope to Munna we're not here to worship systems we're not here to worship models when I did it worship bags the models and the systems I here to help kids the kids are not at work we hated to fit systems systems were created to help children so when you describe becomes a model of box this kid looks he says I'll never be another I'm gonna be the loser so one day thousand you got I'd be a loser good are gonna meet losers or at least money and you won't be a loser then they'll honor you organ Bullen what there ever was teaching this boy with something so precious and essential to you - kite we don't have models of perfection we have one model of perfection fulfilling the mission that God has put you on the world for how do you know what that mission and you know what that Jesus is our summative said on a summer come tire up of developed lezzy basic arc secure kit takes a toy Vuitton I Eden in - miss of the rarest minutes a soul could come down for 80 years to do one favor to a person who knows what a mission is you want to be a gobble gobble means fulfilling the ruts and I said that's what your sleazes if God created you then and one week after learning ten hours you could learn along with Gemara that's how you become the most perfect greatest human being you can become we don't worship a particular image and we say this is perfection my sossel a couple I thought they told us that God has no images suddenly wherever you look God has a picture this is what it looks like and if you don't fit into this your Devore is to detach we saw a person not brush um I am NOT butter it's not my mind with my child I want to polish the diamond that he or she could understand and appreciate that they have the exact choices that they need to become the most beautiful glittering diamonds and divine gifts in this world indeed the forum asks a question where Shoshanna we say om higher asylum Harrah's doesn't really mean birth you know what harass means our husbands pregnancy term comes from year me another year me I know he cursed the day he was born here Mia says I wish I would have remained forever pregnant I would have been a stillborn hi Rasulullah brahma is the expression in yeah Mia I wish I would have remained pregnant forever in the womb of my mother Kyle took the two words over here Mia I asked they changed from pregnancy to birth and alum from forever to the world and Rosh Hashana when you look in an English Missouri you dismount oh yeah my last home today is the birthday of the world not what it means means today is eternal pregnancy year Mia wanted a dying the womb of his mother he never wanted to be born because of the curse life that he felt he had for those of you studied your meal again I don't know if anybody on this side started your meal but probably one or two on this side Jewish men don't learn in the Bible there's something I don't know why telling me yet the Bible you don't touch it's for Christians right it's a funny thing I speak sometimes without the Guardian and it's an interesting crowd they're very different than Jews as you may know first of all they listen second of all they don't have opinions when the Jews even Jews listen like you it's with an opinion he's good he's not so good he was better yesterday not enough jokes too many jokes oh this I'm gonna use this I'm going to use this is a good part this is a good word Jews always having opinions actually they listen they also don't sit like this they don't sit like this you sit like this because it's a defense mechanism so come with heaps of arson but they actually sit and but another interesting thing is you quote a pasta can come after they finish it I'm like Isaiah 60 Jews the best you'll get is coyopa and that's already a hush of a compliment it's also not so partial today Skype but not no more but yes they a possibly finish how asked that Woodrum how did this result a car a stolen which means forever pregnant and they turned an entire in my asylum today is the birthday over the world the answer is at the core of your role with our children and that is that's the question of Rosh Hashanah that's the question every single person is pregnant with potential every person is pregnant with a tremendous child a tremendous blessing that the world is waiting for the question after ask myself under Shoshanna is what is going to happen well my Hollis I lung remain pregnant well my dreams my potential my vision my talents my resources my life will it remain pregnant and will I suffer a spiritual miscarriage and stillbirth or I ask Allah will I give birth to my true powers to my true inner light to my true inner potential and if you'll notice on Yom Kippur the Kohen Gadol used to say a very short feeler in the kadesha Kaddish I'm very short and he asked for three or four things and one of them was lice appeal aisha pre-bid nah no woman should have a miscarriage she didn't ask that sick people should become healthy he didn't ask that women who can't have children after soldier he didn't ask for long life or health he asked for one thing no miscarriage why that because not only did he mean it literally osa menance meant it symbolically every child is the son it's arranged size every child is pregnant with infinite potential every child of a summer summer which is a hay lake and they call me my mama's two piece of the ribeye national I'm in this world it's pregnant with infinite dignity value potential but how tragic when you see so many people whose little infinite children never make it in the light of day harass or long has two interpretations and you and I have to decide what it means for us and what it means for the people under our care then it's seared DeRusha shiva of allah gene ribbon offed all the heats have naphthol edits via hood the berlin once at the completion of one of his forum told the story and he said when I was by Mitzvah I heard a conversation between my parents one night I was supposedly in bed and Pappy told mommy we tried all these years no success tomorrow I'm taken into a carpenter he'll become an apprentice for a carpenter at that time when you were 13 you didn't sit on a bench for the next 15 years so they can make a sugar for you if you weren't doing anything you went to work you went to work didn't it seve said my father said he's gonna become an apprentice of a carpenter at least eleven normal job will build standards I came out crying and I said Tata give me another chance he says which right six years the Geithner's it's fine you'll be a wonderful carpenter I asked him for one more chance he said one more day the next day I applied myself diligently and Here I am today the rugged mr. Shiva of our lodging and he told his boys he said why why did I do it I'll tell you why I realized one day I'm gonna face my heavenly maker you know their boyish little masks everybody what do you do for a living let's take a tongue and I would tell her I was a carpenter Thompson's new Lama Sam and I would so understand the the table that she the bouquets the monoi the the beam adorned cleavage I'm sorry but one question where's the hammock daughter that's the commentary of the midsummer homage with the hammock Schaller commentary on it seven shelters with the embrasure fair commentator than itself on the Haggadah where's a mechanic see commentary Oh didn't save on the Safari where are all these forum that was supposed to enrich the world of tyranny any dish guy that I wouldn't have what the answer aside decided I'm gonna learn so not long ago illiteracy Russia she who was talking to his boys who were collection banks for many many years and he said I want to tell you a story he told him the story and then he finished he said I'm afraid when you come to heaven Hashem is gonna say what do you do with your lying they say what do we set your shoe in quite a little for years now shunts is really interesting but I have one question hi I'm Harrison long and the Jewish world the Jewish community can't thank you enough for the fact that every day rain and shine difficult and easy days children who have one type of challenge or another type of challenge are many challenges you walk into the room you look at this little boy a little girl and what you see is a hail akela calm me Mom Amish because I know that uncle could have not had a success at had the Milam me Derrick whatever if it's therapists if it's educated and enlightened and inspired staff if it's leadership throughout the entire organization was not permeated with that vision the ballot Anya once said in cabbalistic words but I'll explain that fayeed ish fi e dish can deferment cookin V air state in March over Duma the Adam Kadmon anybody he knows what ma Sharma had to do mid-autumn Cadman is the term of the reason when you look at a Jewish child you have to see the way he or she stands in the primordial thought of Hashem what's Bashar shudders as I the Gemara says in huland Yaakov saw a ladder you remember the Malakand were going up and down sagar the Gemara the Malakand were going up to look at the archives image above they were coming down to look up yak hooves image below what's up shots every person has two images your image above your image below what are these two images the image below is Who I am what I look like in the mirror the image above is what Hashem thought about me when he created me some created every person what was his my shovel when he created you what did he see remember everyone or any of you have a thought of creating a movement on organization a website a business ok Hill School in your mind's eye was Esther what do you see when the rebinding song created every neshama what did I shan't see in this the shaman this body in this human being that's the image above the image below is what I look like in reality and by the way the Baal Shem Tov said what's the definition of granadan and Gehenna when you come up you see the two images who you could have been and who you were for some people it's paradise for some people it's hell that's what it is you see who you could have been who you were meant to be who had the potential to be and then you see yeah III didn't realize who I am I lost it the Malakand went up and down because they never saw a person whose two images were perfectly synchronized when you walk into that room whether it's a classroom or a Therapy Center or the various centers you have or whatever visit typed by the place it is and you look at that child whether he or she is two or three or four or five or NDA's your own children your students and all of the people under your tender love and care what you do every day is you don't only look at their image below you look at their image above you don't only look at their image below one challenge another challenge another challenge this one wrote the child love this school said we're not dealing with this person the pirate saying we want to kill ourselves that's the image of the law I can't do anything if that's what I see I have to see that you have to see the concrete but you have to connect the concrete and the abstract I have to be able to look at this child and ask myself one question when Hashem created the soul what did he see what did he think what did he see in this person if I cannot see that in this child I'm not in the right position doesn't mean it's not stressful it doesn't mean I don't have to practice self-control it doesn't mean I don't need a good coffee or shot of caffeine or some of us whatever we need I don't want to discriminate against anybody sensitivities here [Music] but what it means is after be able to have the vision of seeing the image of this person from God's perspective thus set them a --brush was that the a burst in them in dem Kent I want to conclude my words to you today with a story the story I heard from the bahá MYSA he sent it to me by an email with an email he's a Jew from England it moved me so deeply and this is what he wrote to me said when I was 9 years old I like to Google myself I like you know some kids you or any of you have kids you know some kids like different things I like to look good to be neat I was into my clothes my hairdo what I looked like it came from a British classic traditional family and one day I come into class it's parshas Valley a shovel learning and my Rebbe turns to me and he says I want you to read this Rashi loud and I thought oh great today is my turn I didn't realize what's coming which rashly did he give me to read you could remember Ayla told us Yaakov who nars of Joshy Lisa mice and I also read that Russia I see you all know that Ashley Wow oh wow okay not the Bible Genesis they were Genesis mother but they learned they're gonna learn the Bible this year they'll have it on the night table of Thomas : so grouchy I see my son is I suppose doing he was waving like a kid and one of the examples is massage soul Basara he combed his ear and I'm reading there since I'm nine years old I'm innocent that was tweeting their action innocently and the teacher says read it again read it again read it again - do you know why she's put in the box I said yeah yes that's you it's imagine and the boy stopped laughing everybody knows he grooms himself in horror childless he says I run out of the classroom and I run home I run home we pink humiliated in public and we think my father was home I walk into my father's office he was sitting by his desk I'm crying he says what happened I tell him look how we had a relationship with his father that he could tell it right some of you know very well when you would come home from yeshiva crying because the rebel gave you a flask you got I bought a commission right above a combination and a good day but you'll soon understand he had a father he had a real father so he comes on to his father and he tells his father what happened and he tells me says I'm ray Jacobson my father looked he thought he said I love it I love the comparison I love it I always see you as yourself do you know the end of the story with Joseph you know the end of the story he dreams that everyone is gonna come back downtown the brothers are so jealous but he saves the world from hunger he saves his family from hunger the reason you and I and qawalli all are here today is because Joseph I always saw you as that boy I always what a good comparison you're destined to leadership to greatness I love it said my father gave me a hug and that was it the wound disappeared and he tells me I have to tell you not a week goes by when one of my classmates doesn't call me and say I need a device I need a loan I need assistance I need help here I need her over there I made it very very successful person affluent person not a week goes by one of those kids doesn't call me and say wow how did he become such an issue could you help us a couple of dollars a little eights a little this says my father was right and then I realized the preciousness of your work every gesture you make to your child even your body language the way you greet those boys and girls when you meet them in the morning when they afternoon to the evening your attitude your perspective even the things that you say before they leave or right when you begin besides for the work itself the way you look at them the way you value them the way you believe in them the way you accentuate that potential never never underestimate it's timeless and eternal impact and benefits because in Judaism the way we celebrate the birthday of the world the birthday of the planet the birthday of civilization the birthday of the cosmos is only one way by celebrating the life and the potential of one Jewish child thank you for your work a good [Applause]