When You See My Darkness, Don’t Run

[Music] thank you good night foreign [Music] foreign [Music] all right solid yeah yeah yeah foreign [Music] foreign how is it ain't safe by definition it's a contradiction Islam is saying serve the worlds of infinity or to put it differently the word I love comes from the word Helen which means concealment sick so I'll tell you so I asked this question many years ago from the bureau Khan Saturday was answering he'll do with it what you want he said preach Simpson the question was if it's post-symptom so to some Islam it's a world a world of infinity if it's a world it's already some type of uh Consciousness structure some some concealment spiritual space and time she said there is a language that preached symptoms that's his expression there was no space for the world what does it mean there was no space as we said unless it doesn't mean there was no physical space that too if I'm sitting in this chair you can't occupy this chair because it's already taken the himself already took up everything conceptually and physically but he means much more than that there was no conceptual space like if somebody in Yeshiva says asvara says an idea right when somebody says this idea has no place this this idea has no place what do you mean there's no place there's no chair for it and there's no chair there's no stand there for it has no place means it doesn't exist it's foolish it's an impossibility it has no place in the universe in the universe of logic the universe of stupidity it has a place but in the universe of logic there's no there's no place for it because it's not a possibility it's ridiculous it's absurd it's not what it means it doesn't make sense right it's Folly Etc foreign in reality there was no place you know God is well everywhere so there's no space somewhere where do I come in if Hashem is everywhere so there had to be a symptom he had to so to speak you know leave the room so I could come in that's more like in terms of you know like in reality there's no space because he's here but that's already a post to some metaphor it's like we're competing you know he's here I'm here you're here I'm sitting on the chair it's already we're using a language that really doesn't know what so really is much more subtle it means preached symptom if you would talk about the world nobody would understand what you're talking about it will be like the vocabulary creates reality there was no vocabulary for it because the the concept could not be understood for space time it's not like it's not like God is here so you're not here no that's that's already much much that's already much that's really in a much lower paradigm in the vocabulary was not here it's it's a h yes what what is the concept before the existence is the concept of existence in other words you wouldn't even relate to anything outside of events what's a little metaphor for that if somebody comes into the Yeshiva it doesn't say a wrong idea Ravi he says I came up with a brilliant Revelation last night and that is that nine plus nine equals pink right or equals a chair nine plus nine equals coffee you're not arguing no no it's not that's not what you're actually means I would think of what it means nine plus nine doesn't equal pink you know you're gonna you're gonna ask other questions what this person needs why it's not in the realm of logic if you tell me nine plus nine equals seventeen okay I'll tell you Pusha made a mistake let me do the calculations with you right if you tell me a hundred times a hundred or even more more complicated mathematical equations sometimes very fine I made a mistake you identify the logic and you identify the flaw nine plus nine very good now nine plus nine equals equals pink okay so he's like this pre-symptom to speak about the islamas is nine plus nine equals pink post symptom in the higher realities to talk about the elements is nine plus nine equals 17. you understand the concept the vocabulary is there that's what I mean an empty space was created there's a new vocabulary the pile there's eight seif in Asia in our world nine plus nine is seventeen nine plus nine is P 9 plus 9 is 17. the more stupid you are I'm singing our world and our world yeah attacker works you don't see any Scythe in the higher world than Allah was saying so if post symptoms they know ain't so if they feel ain't safe but it's already called the world to speak about the world it's like nine plus nine equals 17 in other words it's the way ain't surface felt within a reality where you can understand time and space but you know that the truth is that it's infinite but there's already a vocabulary that you can discuss you can discuss this way you can discuss that way the interesting that wherever is using the the word the world you would think that the world was created he's using right so so already even in post some you have the Guillory of edge South but it's an opposed symptom reality hence it's called ilum yeah so that's also in in in in post-symps and then olomaticon is that Silas is built on that just to clarify that uh there is a lotion in the nightmare there is a Russian and the mimer on Patriot base he does quote from the original basiligani oil massage which is which is to use the word Island massage in other words to use the word Island world I'm just saying there is that expression even though in the explanation generally saying Safi singers post some so much as and then attilis and then br I guess on you know the more subtle more subtle more subtle levels even in pre-symptom um the way Infinity imagines finiteness perhaps is the way the world is called ancientific not Simpson the way Infinity imagines finiteness but it's all an expression of Infinity but it's already the source for something that one day will be finite when you imagine something it's still inside of you but it becomes a source for something else just like in artillery there's Caleb over there it's not limited but it becomes a source for the limitedness of Beyond so it may be on higher levels right the insightlessness some can become a source for elements it first has to exist in The Source before it emerges and it's done subtle but but I'm gonna go back I'm not gonna go back not to ruin the idea that all of this is relevant the way it's experienced in a person as we will see the nishamas is the one that holds on to all their screams and won't give up Consciousness Won't Give Up on the two Polar Opposites of a Locus it's the it's the interlacing link right it's diffusing between the two and that's why Paradox is so essential to consciousness you're with us that's not psychology that's a cities the Consciousness we described here and said the most of history people are struggling what's Consciousness it's so elusive we know it's there there are people who say it's not there you're just a machine fun but I'm okay if you want to believe that because you know it's not it's not our discussion today but everybody knows there's Consciousness right just like people know this choice they know this Consciousness even though we can argue a whole day there is it's not it's an illusion it's not but what is this what is this it's so elusive it's so it's so Elusive and what's it within animal Consciousness and human consciousness it's also we know there's a Quantum Leap there we know there's a Quantum there's something that I'm dealing with that the Chimpanzee is not dealing with that the rat is not dealing with the elephant with all respect to uh the Brilliance of animals and the sensitivity of animals and the spirituality of animals and the beauty of animals and the emotions of animals so that's where the bashamta was describing that in every reality this is one realm of reality it includes a lot but it's one realm a Locus is so to speak another realm of reality it's everything but it's a realm of reality and the Shamus is the is the experience of all of it and in the language of this which is and then there's nishamas which is a Locus and then there's olamis which are worlds and in the language of Kabbalah of the ramas it's Adam kadman or element after the symptom and then you have attilus with this Calum and then you have Sia with his period with his separation so I was describing that this definition of Consciousness is Caleb the shamas come from Calum is really the undefined becoming defined that's Consciousness Consciousness is the aspiration to define the undefined to experience the infinite to experience the undefined if Consciousness would not be Elusive and not be consciousness that's what it is it's trying to make sense trying to bring into experience something that's inexperiential something that's undefined states of reality to become reality to be able to to grasp because Consciousness is an experience Consciousness is somewhat serious it's been seism it's Caleb there's some ego not not a bad ego but there's some ego there's some trees that's what Caleb Mark Caleb are the way that ain't cyphus channeled through foreign between the infinite and the finite between the undefined and the defined and that's it's incredible quality does any of this resonate with anybody with us huh yeah that's what a nesham is said in every word you have these three things means open up the light let the light come into the word in other words experience it on a level of nasham if we let go of everything we can more than understand that we can experience it if we let go the hardest part is not understanding the hardest part is Letting Go and then you know already it's there it's it's who I am the letting go is the hardest part whenever I'm having a conversation with somebody that while something will ask the first question are we talking on which frequency are we talking without a frequency of elements or Holocaust does that answer that question then we can move on mathematics it's very good for marriages by the way you sit down with your spouse to talk which frequency are we on are we in frequency of islamas oh that's a good question that's a good question if there's the marriage therapists what's the language of nasham ah because if I'm talking islamus and she's talking to shamas yeah you're on one level of the table she's on another level of the table which is normal because you know animals were on one level and humans were on another level and the garbage was on another level right you know what Rashi says yeah the devil because because that's really completely different frequencies what's the consciousness of the animals the consciousness of the human being what's the consciousness of the garbage what about something says you have to connect the three frequencies you have to bring them together you have to open up a light to elements that it should be able to connect to nishamas through which it connects with helicus and then hashama is the is at the vortex of it the nesham is the Sula muts of Arts the latter that stands on the ground and its head reaches heaven right so he named malakia like even the malachim go up and down as we'll see that's nashama foreign letting go of the eagle letting go of the ego that that that that blocks reality not letting go of the ego that uh in the sense that you know you become a shmatter like we spoke last time yeah you're right you're right you can't you can't heal ego with ego you can't heal ego with ego because you're replacing problem one with problem two that's true you can only heal ego with ain't safe that's true that's important we try to heal ego with ego one ego is not working I'll bring in another ego but I'm creating the first problem again it's it's very vulnerable it may last for a few months but it's not it doesn't have the power you have to heal with something that transcends the problem makes sense it's actually interesting in mathematics there is a concept called complex numbers complex numbers yeah they don't exist right because we know what the real numbers right decimal numbers yeah complex numbers were invented they measure our numbers right so they were invented to actually explain Concepts in physics in a much simpler right so basically it's a language that well suddenly you can express electricity and and many other civil engineering issues in a simple way although those numbers in reality don't exist it's a really mental Bridge why are you mentioning that because it's a bridge between Infinity so you're saying complex numbers and Mathematics not that the numbers exist so vocabulary created to be able to Define and articulate Transcendent or abstract ideas here so these are the more beautiful without knowing what I was saying no I I in the power of two is equal minus one imaginary number suddenly opens up for you A World to express yourself in a completely different way it's an imaginary concept good stuff used or really bridging almost like Infinity electricity and yeah yeah now let's let's start forget is not her ideas you know to play with ideas don't think it means he says AK I don't think it means that syllis even though you would think it might think it might be those because those realities are already called MATA in the sense that they are worlds but that's not the lamata of the tacos when you say low low to no end it's low to no end for this we introduced the third dimension which is where separation happens and you have to understand the Kiddush and Kabbalah there's an expression this is an expression from the ramacha de Vero I'm just going to say it is the distance between atcillus and asea is infinitely less than the distance between atzillus and what's higher than atilis the distance between atcillus and Asia which is distant I see is our world until this is divine so this is God's world when I say God's will I mean a world in which godliness is completely the reality of it it's not divorced it says there are Mark the difference between asean and Silas is smaller it's infinite but it's smaller as though with these levels of infinity that's that's another idea it's more than Duty not silicon higher than not Silas what he's saying is that you have to understand that at Silas even though it's we call it elucus and sometimes ain't safe but because it's serious because it's Caleb understand what a Quantum Leap that is from a pre-calem reality right but yet what he's saying here is that axillus and the ulama saying itself have that still commonality despite the infinite difference that they're both Calum for ain't safe because it's an island of Actos and as long as this Oneness you're always Achilles for itself even though absillus is Caleb and Calum is so if it's still a Kaylee for himself because it's the world of artists there's a seamlessness there's a flock this connection there's still attachment what happens over here there's a true Quantum Leap in the sense that here the possibility for fragmentation for separation for detachment or the word I was using was disassociation on all levels of this Association that's what's introduced by Hashem he's the one who creates this bridge and that's the greatest of the zihar uh that even as you go down below where there's no gilia veins so if absolutely not and they're not a Kaylee friend so if because if it would be it wouldn't be Bri it wouldn't be it said it wouldn't be a Seer there's a sense of Detachment nonetheless that too that too is a revelation of ainsife which needs explanation of course but that's uh that was the point what does this mean in a person's life just mind games but you throw out another few words how's it going to help you in your job today you want to answer that question [Music] so what we're going to see is very good basically a night Movado that always that always works into this that always works and it's true and what does that mean so foreign [Laughter] foreign so now together no no it's a good question we'll see later that when you say la Mata the entachus itself and that itself the way it's breathed the way it's sitted the way it's Asia [Music] but still in Holiness in katusha and then there is the way it goes into clipper and the clip itself there's levels means even in the lowest of the lowest of the law it's all part of the matadentacles but that itself is going to be a whole system of how low how low do you really go is there a point where you say you're just too low is there a point that look in the mirror and I say I'm just I'm just too low which it seems like that at some point you say you're just a low life I'm just a lowlife not just low but low of low low low what they call you know this the scum of the Earth ah foreign that nothing can get lost the reason nothing can get lost is because nothing is ever lost not because you're gonna find it because it was never lost because what it really is is even though the distortions can be unbelievably painful and wreak havoc no question this is not a romanticization of of reality on all levels but it's the ultimate source of tick on for the world right that's why Google is embedded in the DNA of Judaism it's it's not because one day there's going to be a savior who's going to do good things for the world it's because essentially all of life is a discovery of ain't safe and even in the lowest place you're going to see that it was all ain't safe the problem was Distortion the problem was perception and even perception is part of La Mata and that's the moment where there's a full taken because when you realize that even your perception perception is also reality right all reality is perception in fact there's no reality outside of perception when you realize even the perception was the ain't safe trying to make sense of itself so then it's not like the evil has to be transformed you realize the whole negativity was just a misinterpretation the misinterpretation itself was a misinterpretation and that's Redemption in our own lives what it means is that there's really no bad parts that's what we're going to be learning here when I say no bad parts of course there's bad parts well you know what I wanted to do yesterday oh you know what I did yesterday forget about what I wanted to do what I did what do we know bad parts so you have to be careful of course a person can be very very destructive and a person could be very very dysfunctional and we can have inside of us very very toxic and dysfunctional and destructive forces we call it the itsahara right the evil inclination but in the ultimate equation we talk about the transformation of everything how does that happen not because one day God is going to come with atomic bombs and blow up the eight Sahara and nucleate Sahara so if everything it's harder is nuke they'll only be a yetzer type that's a very uh polarized vision of reality what happens is we're gonna we're gonna learn the pinimius of the atsar the real real premise are you inside even in the lowest places even in the lowest places the ain't safe is fully present there I have to open myself up to it and that means God's that's what he says in the beginning of the Bible Hashem put his life on the line because when you go to those places it's painful if I go to a place where I can be hijacked and abducted and manipulated and exploited to the opposite of who I am and I'm going to let it happen and I'm not going to run away you know how painful that is why do we disassociate why pain I'm not going to stay here I'm not staying here to stay here but Sarah it doesn't mean is wherever you are God builds bleachers he gets a seat he buys a ticket then he watches it means Hashem says wherever you are I'm here I did a runaway I'm gonna watch it I have a screen I have a screen in attila's I see everything not only that I'll feel your pain I'll comfort you that's all true Avada but here means something much deeper doesn't even though your tummy I'm still calling myself your father I'm not connect I'm not disconnected it's much deeper than that it's that it's sorry itself is me images The Experience itself is me I'm not just watching it means that ain't safe itself that's that so to speak being hijacked and and manipulated and is so vulnerable and is going through that Journey Avada Avada that's true it goes back to the question of Simpson you're right is so profound that there's no separation but that also means that the hope is not just there's hope that you will go to a good place it's much deeper than that the hope is already right now you just have to unburden on burden and open up the reality of what's happening so it's a very it's a very deep paradigm shift and today in this today like everything it opens up in in the you know the balsamic they opened up the air and then the world ultimately receives it in the new systems of recent years of psychology internal family systems for example is a model and other models it's it's going more and more to this nakuda where it's not uh you know exposing you to your evil or uh or or or or or or teaching you how to ignore parts of yourself or to deal with parts of yourself or to fight parts of yourself which all have a place it's all escapia but it's really learning that everything you thought was so bad and negative was really earnings and that's a that's that's that's that's unbelievable because it shows how deep the goodness is easier said than done because it's scary it's Darkness but even the darkness is out itself that says until there was once a younger man who came to him because he uh difficult you know spiritual challenges he had it was Anonymous you know things within the intimate realm of a person's life and he opened up to the to the middle of the middle it ever rolled up his sleeve and he showed him that his his skin was shriveled it was like this expression the skin was shriveled up huh not Goosebumps like skin like dried like like a little lamaciated uh and he looks at him and he said this dos is he coming from dying cattle this came from your uh from what happened by you actually in the first bus in the garden he said with the story he was crying told him or before like he had it before because no he had it he said this is because of what you you can't dry up your skin in the middle of a conversation it'll be hard it was something happened over there it happens over the years so at first glance it's very strict somebody's coming confessing wants a tick on what do you do you encourage them you give them a direct truth I mean right like we say in the illah you know God Waits the courage to give him a terrible it says more guilt now oh you destroyed me too so that episode was telling him is don't think you were ever alone I was right there with you I wasn't on your web only when you showed up in full spiritual robust posture I was your deba even in the darkest places with nothing event here it's on my skin what does that mean that means I'm not staying there so you're also not staying there if I was there what do they say in Brussels right if you think you could destroy the world so then believe you could build the world you're not just you're not just a killer if you could destroy so many people so you can also build so many people I was there with you once you know I was there with you then we're going up I'm not staying there so you're also not staying there don't think I detached it's the deepest form of empathy the deepest form of empathy is not saying I'm sorry I feel bad but that's that's beautiful the deepest form of empathy is can you be there with me and that's heart I'm ready to be nice I'm a nice person I'm a gentleman I'm not I won't even be judgmental which is a nice madrega it's not a nice Madre not to be judgment but that's not the word that's not the word can you be there with me that's where all healing comes from I must have huh they're a big therapists that's it's true you try it out you'll see try it out you'll see I know a person I just I know a person you're in a crazy crazy childhood unbelievable like Shiva madurai emotional leads sexually physically and it it we're learning here that I wanted to say it messed them up we're learning here that you can get messed up but it at least on some level of reality it messed them up very badly and he told me there was somebody in his life at some point he went through a process of discovery and healing but still he struggled a lot because it's it's deep issues like we spoke about it's stuff that happens before your eye is formed so somebody messed with you before you were congealed so it's very toxic if it's very dangerous you understand he was messed with before he had identity so there was nobody to hold on to anything there's no Kelly you understand there's no kayleeve there's no Kaylee so you don't know who you are you your trauma it's all the same thing he said it was once a person in his life somebody close to him you know who looked him in the eyes and I asked him what was the moment of healing for you like not healing but the transformation somebody looked him in the eyes somebody who knew him very well and knew the whole story and and that person was was like crying and the person said I am so sorry for what you went through you would think simple words right but they were genuine and for this person almost in a moment I'm not going to say it undid that would be stupid and not true but it brought so much comfort and and dignity to his life what did the person do he was not alone they went into that place with them it wasn't an explanation it wasn't a pathway forward because the soul knows everything the soul knows how to heal the soul knows how to heal but it's eclipsed I'm in isolation I'm alone so that that connection that connection that attachment that deep relation with relational energy it it allowed the person to see themselves from a different perspective yeah yeah why can't he do it himself saying it to himself for 20 years won't be the same why not could you answer that question why if I say that to myself for 20 years it doesn't have the power of that person telling it to me myself to say to myself huh right because I don't believe me that's part of it I don't believe me when I say oh you I'm sorry right which are you saying I'm sorry the eye that doesn't exist thank you you don't even exist who are you to tell me I'm sorry but the other person right that's like a real self it makes you it makes that that's so that's what that myth level was telling him you see this don't think I was detached it wasn't now feel more guilty [Music] it was I'm I'm the tackle size huh he showed it on the skin he didn't have to mean it did ever set it over the first bus in lagani toughness he was trying to bring out what is what means connection what it means connection and he said was uh like an ashama it was kulia Lacoste he was not the he didn't know a tourism he was complete and he said but this didn't when he connected to his students tell me this was the level of connection that's the story when the middle was learning and a baby fell out of the crib and he did it to his own baby he didn't hear and altadabra was on the higher floor and he came down he picked up the baby and then he gave him a few a few weeks later a few days later he told them that if you're learning and you don't hear the curl yellow so something is wrong in the learning he didn't say even when you're learning you have to hear a baby crying he said if he said much more if you're learning and because of that you don't hear a baby a child weeping there's something missing in the learning his father trained them you hear the voice of nothing you could say you have to be a mensch don't don't go run away that's not what he said he said usually you would say it's good tight if you don't hear a baby crying it means you're learning well right Dr never said superficially yeah it means you're an intellectual but really something missing in the title if the title causes you not to hear somebody a child crying something is not if there would be that it wouldn't only be is you would hear the baby crying I think that story captures a very very fundamental idea of terrorism Toyota you connecting to you understand is it the type of connection or is the title of I'm gonna become a genius and better than everybody else then it's already a fake title like the Gamora says it's not always have to remind me yeah I said oh when that episode over the story he said that he heard from his father-in-law that altareba lived on the higher floor up second floor in the middle I believed on the lower floor and the baby fell down so he said why did he have to say that just to part so he said there's a deal care so as a desire there's two levels the lower level of unity and the higher level of unity right she said after that stock he lived on the higher floors listen very good names he heard the Kalyan the middle it ever didn't not and that's not Alpha begin it's because of that like the mice with him Kipper you know the mycium keep in the middle of you know everybody is very serious he took off his Talus he took off his Kittle and he left sure he left sure you don't know the mice he left true and at the end of the city at the end of the state of liajna it's a town in Belarus you could visit it there's nothing left there the Nazis killed everybody but Liars are still there at the end of the stat till he went there was a ladis there was a woman a mother who gave birth a few days before and it was the night of culmidris everybody wanted to go to shul you know him keep her people want to go to school so they left her along with the baby and she was in a very difficult situation the baby was crying and she got sick there was nobody there to help her and altered he took wood he chopped it up he put it in the fireplace he lit a fire and he he cooked a soup and he fed the mother so she could nurse the baby and she went out because she went out from danger and then he went back to show so the devil asked he said this is what he heard this is the story heard it from his father-in-law so he said what's the greatest of the story the Mario says you don't tell a child you know you go you you go help him it's a Mitzvah beguddle because you don't want in a secure the situation you could say oh we need a child we need somebody else because he went himself he says that's not the greatest of the story of the story is foreign [Music] felt the pain of the of the elders he heard the baby cry huh of course and there's a reason for it it says it says in Allah because you don't want it the next time Eve yeah yeah I know what Mitzvah means no no I meant great in stature because you shouldn't think that that next time if if there's only if only he's there he's not allowed to do it so even when other people are there but that's where pastors on a deeper level means the more Godly you are the more you feel it so this so so the more you feel the obligation and all this brings out the nakuda that Odin says is a connection that is so profound that it's not just I'm here but it's completely one it's not just I'm here but this is me this becomes me God allows himself to be defined by the matadentless that's the ultimate paradox Calum is not the ultimate Paradox because Kayla means structure but I'm a vessel I'm a vessel I want to be a vessel I want to contain you I know that containers are brutal because they limit but I want to limit you I want to be here that's Caleb so that God allows himself to be defined by Caleb okay he says in zapella it's not the pillar that's not the Pella that I allow myself to be defined by lamata by period by the separation that's the pillar that I allow myself to be defined by structure it's hard and there are Max says it's even bigger hiddish than anything else but it's not the ultimate pal of fresh taste the flag's good but but that that's that's the word that to allow the self to remain present and not just remain present like to be defined by that which is opposite of you that's mysterious the only that's that's the mysteriousness that's the word what does Mr sniper say something means you give up the self [Music] you give up even the image of the self you give up the self it says you put yourself on the line to the point that he allows him to become defined by that which is Mama's opposite not a Kaylee you're not a Kaylee he's not a Kaylee and that's why nobody's going to be lost because it's all it's all them and that's the most vulnerable moment in the relationship to realize you were there not only you were there this is you wow it's very very emotionally healing it's very emotional this is dead this is not computer you're right if you say symptoms foreign [Music] you understand there's a layer of reality we are this is how things are experienced and there's validity to it every in Kabbalah every inside is true doesn't mean it's Allah but it's true it's MS it's describing a real frequency it's a real truth in the ultimate world there's no contradictions there are contradictions but that's also true that's also part of it where else there wasn't a question by him self somebody once asked altered what's the difference between a mask and an over de nazillus a Moscow means a philosopher in godliness and over to somebody who works on themselves who internalizes it he says what's the difference of muscle and over there so he said [Music] the Hest a says in Zaya that it sits us the four corners of the merkava the four parts of the merkava foreign I thought I'm going to give today a minute introduction and we're going to go right into the text but uh now I didn't really explain anything today I'm just I'm just acknowledging that right no I'm just I'm just a what okay thank you for agreeing I'm saying I didn't really explain anything like it's it's beautiful words doesn't mean I'm there it means it's me I'm allowing myself to be defined by that but I want you to I want you to be tough as the hedusham here the the sedusham here not I'm here which is also very big to be present is big but it's much deeper I'm allowing myself to be defined by this I'm being transformed by what's happening I'm becoming a new reality which is completely disassociated for me does anybody know that pain now what does this mean in people's lives it means that the soul does the same thing when you go into a place where you have to detach yourself from yourself you know why you have to do that because it's too painful to stay yourself who who went in over there so you think in psychology they'll tell you was a fake self it was a fake self that detached from the real self you became a shell of a person like a child who went through a lot of abuse they disassociate so the abuse is not only on the shell so myself is an exile because I can't feel the pain what we're saying here is something much deeper happened the real core was right there even in the fake self that became something else the eye doesn't leave because the pain in that is very very deep because Detachment is safety God says no I don't do that I'm going into the war zone what does it mean a war zone a war zone means not I'm gonna watch you I'm Gonna Be You but what does that really mean that really means that you were never ever detached you were never ever ever detached you are always connected with everything the Detachment itself is a vocabulary that is part of the lamata in tacos which is also an expression of Ain't So if the way it's the way it handles its reality in the Mata the entachus but really we're going to be megalitha inside there if we can experience this which is the hardest part we have to understand it and we have to experience it understanding is important but experiencing is where things happen if we can experience this it's very vulnerable because this means I have to give up even on the fact that I'm a victim and we don't always want to do that you know sometimes the hardest thing is to say I'm not a victim I'm healthy that people don't like that always no no no I'm messed up it's almost like a badge of honor you know Hashem I'm messed up I'm traumatized I'm going to be in therapy is almost like a certain uh identity to give up on that is not so easy you know that's also an obsession I'm sick I'm sick I'm dysfunctional it's also a ticket almost like you're having I'm having a bad day of course well what do you expect you know what I went through of course I should have a bad week I have a bad year in a way it becomes also if in in a good way in acharyas in other words you're you're you're you're you're you're you're whole you're not sick you just have to see it that way [Music] okay I just want to learn one paragraph because I don't want to fall too behind there'll be Mama's like five six minutes and then we'll conclude Beijing Hashem will learn also Sunday morning because I want to try to finish the nightmare before on Wednesday so I want to so we'll learn also Sunday morning bleenader at eight like like this past Sunday as well but I want to learn one one one paragraph here we're on the bottom of patriot gimmel the bottom of patriot gimmel in this country by the way the source sheets are on the website on the yeshiva.net if you want to ever download foreign are like the body to the soul are like the garments of the body there's a big difference are two separate things but they're not they become one the miracle of the body is it is your soul it's not just a machine in which your soul functions it's one of the the deepest things we have to understand about the body we look at the body and we're taught the body has a battery the battery is called the nashama that's not the vart now some man goof is a muscle for atzillus it's not there's Caleb and there's an o in the Kelly no the Kaylee is the the Kaylee becomes the iron that's what real Kaylee means in spirituality in physicality of Kaylee means I have a cup and you put the coffee in the cup and spiritual doesn't work that way when you're a Kaylee for something it means you are that you understand it's not I have a key in the drawer I have a file in the drawer the draw is Achilles it's physically spiritually it's not two separate things so when you say something is a Kaylee for something it means I become defined by you I'm a Kaylee that's me but it's I I don't become defined by you in your pristine Transcendence rather I become defined by you the way I can I can Define you and that's the power of Caleb Kaylee is the way I become you but the way I could become you which is not you it's only how I much how much I can become you like the I is a Kaylee for vision but what can I see I can't see everything that's available that's out there I could see whatever my retina right has my my other eye has I don't know millions of sensors to be able to sense and write an axis and the Brain interprets and that's what I could see so Kaylee is the uh but it's the way the o is experienced through the Kaylee which is not the iron in the pristine Essence that's the lamata of attilis but it's one and that's the beauty of goof we talk about the wisdom of the body the body knows the score the body knows everything why who made the body such a genius how does every cell know everything the answer is the Miracle of Life Is that the body becomes the soul the soul becomes one with the body ah I'm sorry that's why I'm sorry the body is not a piece of dead flesh and you put in a Duracell battery right for 80 years for 100 years so the body now is making noise that's not a goof everywhere the definition of Kaylee is that it becomes the oil it's the way the oil is channeled through the Cali when you play a musical note right the the the musical note is the Kaylee but it's the music there's an expression is from the thickness from the density of oil the Calum are formed Calum are formed from her becoming dense the more dense the herb becomes the more the Kelly is oh it's the transformation of oil in a particular structure that's what Gophers goof is nashama it's the way the nashama is experienced through the structure of the body with its limits but the Goof becomes the nashama the Goof itself is alive it's not the soul is in the body the Goof is alive the Goof becomes not separable anymore it's not separate anymore that's why they deny the soul why do they deny the soul they deny that so they say there's no soul no because the soul became so much connected and fused with the body that the body allows you to deny the soul the soul did such a good job that you could deny it right like somebody once said they were learning a mother he says the gemara is so clear yeah what do you need Rashi it actually did such a good job you think you don't need the best job you can do is when somebody thinks they don't need you what's who's the best parent in the world the parent that when the child grows up he could be really independent that's a good parent you did such a good job I don't need you I can tell him they said right the Sun the Moon is much more important than the sun because the sun shines when you don't need it it's daytime who needs it you don't get the joke the the Shabbat does such a good job on the Goof the Goof doesn't need it the Goof doesn't need it [Music] the Calum of atzillus which is Caleb for Irene seif is like the goof to the nashama that's exactly what they're saying which is Goof because in the summer is infinite and the Goof is finite my vision is now coming through my eyes my hearing is coming through my my my my awareness is coming through my physical brain I can't function any other way after a person's passes the nishamas characters are not processed through the Gulf but the difference of life and death is not just the difference of taking out the battery the body is transformed and you see what happens to the body after death it decomposes doesn't have a Mercedes anymore it's not just it lives as a stone it doesn't live as a stone it's gone because once the body is alive it becomes the nashama and without it there's no goof left it's not like okay so let it be a rock let it stay in the earth like Earth completely decomposed cephalertz like the Lucas are broken that's why the broking of the Lucas is compared to the death of sadika you have Gotham that says there's bodies of Sadiq stay whole but that's because of the something in the Goof that's still very much but it's a very unique thing in nature bodies decompose besides the atsum laws so you understand the word that today they love saying that there's no soul the soul is an illusion the reason you could say that is because this because of the fusion of the nashama and the goof the body's not that's because the body is not Allah bush the nervous system is alive it has everything there it becomes the nashama it's a it's a gevaldic of Art that's why the body knows everything people know how does the body you know that you know the body knows everything the body keeps the score as the famous book of uh van der kolk the wisdom of the body how does the body have such genius where did it learn which is Shiva can I go to that Yeshiva the answer is because the body is really ain't safe so that'sillus the Garment is going to be on me my whole life I maybe wear this jacket for the rest of my life but it's not me nobody's going to say that you may see me if I dress nicely I'll impress you you may learn about me from my garments my wealth my dignity my you know people invest a lot in their clothes so the clothes may be a mirror through which you can see a person real close but it's not you and that's what happens in artsillus everything is a Locus even the Caleb are elicus it's like the Goof within a Sharma is in other words there's like a disconnect so you could grab the lavush and detach it from the person the world of separateness emerges in other words the world outside of ainself outside of infinity you understand that transformation is everything so the gap between artillery is a real moment of transcendental trauma I had to use that word because there's a 1.1 million definitions for trauma with capital T but probably one of the most potent and relevant is separation real separation there's no cohesive story anymore the eye has been broken into a thousand piece shattered into a thousand pieces I can have a lot of pain I can have sadness I can experience difficult light a difficult life but there's a story there's a cohesive self that's a Kaylee for everything it's a Kaylee you're still a Kaylee period means yeah now there's a new reality that's not me I don't know who's me I may not even know them me and that's a that's that that's a that's a different quality and it's a you become a different type of person you could start crying when you think about the the leap where does that begin in a Locus that's the leap of Attila what do they say in English you become a shell of yourself what does a shell mean you're a lavish where are you I don't know here I have your jacket I have you but you're not here it's like a lavush it's mama your Tafe is the word there's no Kaylee anymore there's a new reality now a disconnect and that's where isolation comes in there's a disconnect from the self there's a self that's disconnect from the self and but it lives it lives what does it live off it lives off something that's not the self it's very powerful where does that come from in kadusha everything has a source this is the this is the difference between adsilosi so he says it says God created many garments they become levusian for the light of Caleb the Caleb madir the Otis are there but they're they're garments there's nobody here without her there's nobody without Kaylee but instead of calling them a Kaylee for the uh you call them a lavush for though a garment for though now brie is still a very functional world it's a very holy world yet Syria is a good world I see it could become toxic but it begins there's already a beginning something called outside outside of me so let's put it this way let's say Hashem would have stopped the creation by artzilus after atilisi would say at Khan you know the Big Bang is expanding Universe expands expands expands says why is Hashem called because when he created the world right it was it's interesting because it says the universe was it was stretching stretching stretching stretching stretching and then Hashem said die die stop because if you go a little more you know they say the Big Bang would have gone a little faster even off by a millisecond you know where we would be we would everything would just explode a second after creation so they had to be the diet stop or at least slow down stop so there was a stop because you would just go into nothingness Oblivion it had to on one hand it had to expand because there will be no expansion it would become French toast it would crunch up in the heat right on the other hand it couldn't expand too much because then it would just be scattered so I'll be climbius it's very deep there had to be the the expansion there had to be histology because if not everything would get burnt up and ain't safe but if there's too much if there's too much you just left without connection so if God would have stopped the world after that syllis if we would have said die a little earlier there would be no ability no ability for being disconnected there would be an ability for Caleb but not for disconnect you understand because Calum yes structure yeah structure yeah but still ain't safe India started the ability for disconnect period you're all of us there's something outside that's containing my life now understand how deep this is in Berea there's no trauma brie is Godly brie is but it's a lavush that's typhus elicus the vocabulary of Disconnect was introduced I get you it's beautiful but I get you I'm not a Kaylee anymore I'm a lavish I get ain't safe that's brilliant murder dick some I can breathe there's a This breeze that companies not evil Breeze go holy but what what hell you know who's in Bria is good good guys but he is a very high world but so why why why why does it have such bad rap because over there what's the concept the council is not Kaylee it's lavish I dress up that ain't safe I experience the insight so you just started to use the you started to use words that are ultimately based on disassociation that could become disassociation what does that mean in a person's life the beginning the the Genesis of of of of the breakdown of reality is not in dysfunction that's where it comes out it's in the way I perceive the I as a lavush for ain't safe rather than ainsife that's where it happens and that's why that's where the healing is t-r-a-u-m-a doesn't begin in abuse that's when it's materialized it begins because the I is a lavush it's not a Kaylee so there's no actors oh so you're a lavish foreign are a Despicable piece of garbage that's what happens in Asia but the leap started with the change from Kaylee to La bush so the healing is when I go from La vouche back to Cali and then from Kaylee back to uh and that's Ole Miss nishamas olamis is separate from separateness I go back to the psalmist which is a Kaylee and from Kaylee I go back to uh which is a lekus which is beyond Caleb the leap from lavush to Kaylee is very profound because lavush means I am dressing you up and Kaylee is one Oneness every one of these stages exists in the human psyche what we're learning really here is a map of the human psyche using the language of Kabbalah said this is push the map you could map out in the psyche preach him some posts him some attilasia and I see itself all the levels and the question is which frequency you're living with right now so the balship says this was the balship's Revolutionary idea every moment of your life look at your frequency and give it a diagnosis to understand where you are and if you're getting stuck and then with ease allow yourself to move from foreign that's good if I feel that I'm tireless everything then I'm probably tough is nothing Ramesh Shapiro the founder of yomi once came to America to fundraise so uh he got up at a Show's pack that may Shapiro was a brilliant orator and a gun and a very special man he was the rub of Lublin the blind and he came in America and he gave a beautiful speech that show was packed he gave a sheer a pill pull for an hour two hours he came to fundraise for his Yeshiva and he finished people came over here at the end there was a part you'd waiting for him he walks over at the end he says I sat here for two hours I didn't understand a word you said but you're probably here for a good cause for your Yeshiva so here's a check and he gave him a very nice check he looks at him he says you're the only one who understood first test but there's a deep lesson in this is a deep lesson in this worth a hundred years of askala in which something translates into an actual emotional behavioral result is worth more than understanding these things because not understanding it is very powerful but that's where it really the position you know what I mean when I can go to the bank [Music] if today when your child speaks to you right you're triggered forgive me for bringing it down to a very very simple level but you're triggered you're you're really really triggered and you want to blow up which means maybe scream or even run away you're not going to say anything but you lose it huh yeah whatever it is whatever the Escape is it could be me it could be somebody else it could be even God himself whatever but it's an Escape and it's it's very very hot it's it's real it's real it's as real as it gets your body is screaming tell you at that moment not to deny the reality you were triggered you know you're not a robot you're not a computer doesn't mean you deny your emotions but in a very very beautiful and loving way he would say now let's go from islamist to the shamas telekus what does that mean it means I experienced an eye that is very very fragile that is very very angry that is very very vulnerable that is very dependent that is very scared I'm scared about my kid I'm scared about my house and I'm overwhelmed I get it [Music] now can you also feel that and listen to yourself and identify a part of you that is in a place not of Love ocean but of Calum in other words if I can really experience myself now as part of ain't safe how would I react I'm angry I get it a part of me is in a place of period fine that's part of the real life God did that it's not your fault but that's what it means at every moment this consciousness is not my point is don't think this is abstract ideas that are made from the shamas of attilas for people who have time to learn Kabbalah and siddas and all these fancy madriguez it's the oxygen of how to live in a turbulent world and in a turbulent psyche and really comfortably navigate foreign okay my dear friends have a beautiful day we're here Shabbos the next year in this moment will be Sunday morning eight o'clock right here everybody is invited and thank you for gracing us with your presence give me one moment hello what'd you say yeah I'm coming I'm coming I finished this year okay I'll see you in a few minutes the guy this is the guy he tried to bring it all together that was the devil's holding him he's trying to heal the world that's why the river was into mashiachia Hashem wanted this world for this he gives all the treasures what's the deepest treasure he gives it ain't safe to wear to the soldiers but it's not just he gives the treasures he says he puts himself on the line where does he put himself on the line that's what the man was explaining and because he puts himself on the line therefore nobody will get lost and hear the baby cry yet it's that you know we it's very hard the my this mimer is a war on cynicism is a declaration of war on cynicism huh base for cynicism is n't it tinnish sure I haven't heard the baby cry yet I'm here because my my baby my daughter imminently is going to give birth and I would love to have a problem an easy and smooth and a healthy child yes should all be smooth and easy in the right time and a healthy baby and a healthy mother and a healthy grandfather [Music] in the family you were typhus everything okay what is our Theory it says clearly going to show us the question is what type of nashama there's different type of Souls yeah it's not the type of a Jewish song but I have every a guy has a song there's an expressionary oval at the end is a beautiful rambam that everybody speaks about not only in Chevrolet but every person of the sieve of the world even non-jews foreign yes there's different types of souls but every person has a son it says person is precious he was creating the image of Russia every person not only that arizo says and it's brought in Tanya that everything has a soul the reason says everything has a soul multiraptor says that's that Sarah Memorial is the Divine energy that gives it life is the soul and the meaning of that is huh yeah even an animal as well it's just even a rock on Heaven has a soul even at heaven and today we know in physics even in Iraq you have a whole universe a whole Atomic atomic structure and subatomic structure yeah everything okay yeah a rabbit means I don't detach foreign this is an individual his cashless foreign Daven directly so he says you go into that but you're not going to somebody else you're going to your own head he says you're allowed to ask your head to dive into you he says forget your head is the one he says the head feels the pain more than the finger the head feels the pain that took some safer right if you're going to a dead person you attack a right when you're going to if you go into that person you're right when you go into the oil about Sonic you're not going to that person foreign but you see the poem in Allah that you're allowed to go to a cave and forget it's probably even in our before there were people who didn't go it's true the word the word Jews the film are gone yeah the Jews who didn't go to uh huh is uh most shinters that you could go and you go um can go yeah they made a system the oil itself you'll see around the cave where it is but also now they made that the path towards it should also have a machitza through the base that was built a few years ago when we when you said like going to elements we're referring to it we'll see the next year the next year is going to be about that which nishamas are we talking about no problem