When Is Chutzpah A Good Thing?

Hi, this is Rabbi Wolasky with our question and answer series where in a few minutes we try to give you an answer to a question that might be itching you. I'm itching to get an answer. My brother at his 25th wedding anniversary quoted uh from Eishes Chayil and said, you know, how Eishes Chayil, the good wife, more precious than pearls. He says, how do you get a pearl? He says, a little piece of sand gets into a oyster and it irritates it and it releases the lucra to cover it up because it's irritating them. So, sometimes the things that irritate you help to create great pearls. Right? K'neinim in in Eishes Chayil. So, when I got up to speak, I said, I didn't follow his whole speech, but basically his wife irritated him until he agreed to buy her pearls. So, uh that's not exactly how it works, but anyway, when is chutzpah a good thing? That's real rough. Ki ein anachnu azai ponim k'shei oref lomar l'fanecha Hashem Elokeinu v'Elokei avoseinu tzadikim anachnu v'lo chatanu avosainu anachnu avosainu chatanu. We are not so brazen. One of the things we clap al cheit for is an azus ponim. Chutzpah. Yeah. And uh chutzpah is uh is is a terrible thing. Yeah. Pikei Avos says, azus ponim l'gehenim. And uh it's a it's a very rough thing, chutzpah. So, where, if ever, is there a role for chutzpah? So, um there was this fellow who wanted to get into Reb Moshe Shapiro's Tuesday shiur, but it was really only for married people and he was single. But, he couldn't go to the Thursday shiur which was open to the general public. He wanted to get to one of the mayor's sheer. And he says, "What can I do? It's only for married people." He says, "But I have a special skula to become a ben Torah." So, the mayor says, "Yeah." He says, "It says ain't by you should lo made. Somebody who gets embarrassed is not going to be able to learn cuz he's not going to ask his questions." But it says in the Gamara that there are three things that Jews are inherently born with. Rachmanim, byshanim, and gomlei chasadim. They're merciful, they're charitable, and they are get embarrassed. They get shame. What they call Jewish guilt. So, every Jew is at a disadvantage because since he's a byshan and ain't byshan lo made, he has to overcome that. But when I was born, my father wasn't Jewish. So, I'm not such a byshan. So, I'll be able to learn Torah. >> [laughter] >> So, the mayor looks to him and says in English, "You're okay." >> [laughter] >> And he let him in. So, Torah is called oz Hashem oz lamoyitain. Oz is ozvis. When it comes to learning Torah, then you have to be muchat. I mean, obviously, you have to ask your respect, >> [clears throat] >> but you have to question, and you have to push, and you can't let yourself be intimidated. Rabbi Brown told me that the way he developed a kasha with Rabbi Moshe Shapiro is that he heard that Rabbi Moshe Shapiro knows all about hashkafa. So, he went to him and asked him a number of questions, and Rabbi Moshe basically, you know, dismissed him and his questions. And he said to him, "You can call me any name you want. You can do whatever you want to me, but you're the only one I know who can answer these questions. >> [laughter] >> I'm going to stay here till you do. And Reb Moshe smiled and he answered the questions for him and he became a talmud of his for decades. You know, but you you you can't you have to push yourself. That's what you have to do. I'll never forget I was by Reb Moshe on Purim and one of these tatem, these you know, these yeshivas send around these kids to collect money for their their tat tomchei torah to be able to help students, you [snorts] know. And they come dancing in to Reb Moshe's house to ask for money and he says, a grush I wouldn't give you. He says, the minag maguna ad meod. This is not what Purim is for. Purim is for matanos lev you don't have them and not to collect for yeshivas. And they fought with him and they argued with him and they're fighting with him and I was dying. I was dying cuz I have a general principle that I live by and that is don't argue with someone who can turn you into a frog, you know what I mean? I just I picked that up in life. Anyway, so so eventually he pulls out 50 shekels and gives it to the guy. And they go and they leave. I said to Reb Moshe, I said, if that was American, they would never have the chutzpah to do that after you said what you said. And he said, if they were American, I never would have done what I did. But I know that Israelis have an azus to them. There's a chutzpah. And Reb Ovadia once said, of course, cuz this whole country is a chutzpah. We came here and we built the country and and we kicked out the British and we fought against all odds. It makes Israelis mechutsef. You know, it's it's an occupational hazard. A rosh kollel once said to me, you know, the the what is a problem for Israelis is the opposite problem for Americans. Israelis are so mechutsef and so pushy and so nasty. And Americans are like, can I stand here? Am I am I am I am I am all right if I sit over here? Is this a problem? Can I come in?" And they're all afraid to say anything, to assert themselves. And when it comes to Torah, yeah, that's where us. And that's why you pick us when it says um us kanama us kanama review the tema us kanama be brazen as a number right after it says us pan the gehenna. So in Torah you have to be brazen, but don't let that seep into the other aspects of your life. This is David Wolpe with the question and answer series.