What’s The Point Of Life?

[Music] good to be here nice to see some new faces we'll get some more people to come soon we always have to look at the clock and then compare it to Israeli time and we know there's always a difference a little bit uh it's one of the things that anytime when I work with converts I tell them listen if you come on time they're going to question you all your whole life if you're Jewish or not so once once you become Jewish you have to show up plate so some of my students listen to me even before the conversion they listen even before the conversions during the training they already start coming late so uh we have a uh lots of information lot of uh interesting things in regards to the personal story that some people like to hear and also I always like to uh add some male that we could learn from in addition to the story itself uh but if the my are a little more interactive meaning that uh it's not prepared so if you have something in the middle of the Sho don't uh worry about you could raise your hand and you could ask a question at any time it's uh even if it has uh as long as it has something to do with what we're talking about it's no problem if it doesn't it's we can still answer it but the the key of every shu is that that I want everyone to walk home with something leave home you know go go and get something from the shield let say that's you're going to get some type of something and your life is going to change that's the point of every sh if somebody comes to and they come and they leave the same as they came in they completely wasted their time completely wasted their time and the r whoever the speaker was is going to be judged that way and Sham you know and unfortunately today my R told me that the uh we learned this one time and a uh and he said you know unfortunately sometimes you have certain speakers that are very popular and uh they can get crowds of 500 people a thousand people in some events and uh it's a big waste why because sometimes you have 500 people in front of you and sometimes the shim is gives people the impression that everything's okay no one needs to change and the whole Sho is just full of jokes and it's laughing and it's fun which is good for entertainment purposes but not for meaning that is supposed to do something for you you're already a diamond but every single every anyone that knows about diamonds diamonds could always become a little bit better if you cut it a little bit more if if it reflects the light a little more a little more a little more it becomes more valuable so a speaker needs to always know that he's talking to Diamonds but at the same token these are uncut diamonds they're not perfect like they're supposed to be so if he has if if hasem gave him an opportunity to speak to 500 people to five people to whatever it is that means that Hashem gave him a agreement that he's going to hold him to it which means that after 120 a person comes up to Sham say listen in your lifetime I give you an opportunity to speak to 500,000 people all the 500 people 200 people 50 people five people this people that all that after a whole lifetime you go up to Sham you said oh you reached 500,000 people how many of those 500,000 people did Chua how many of them did anything and he's going to start showing the person different things oh see oh this one guy he laid three times okay good three times is good but it's not good for yet oh this guy uh started eating kosher but then he stopped three weeks later this guy oh this guy did J okay so you have one guy you have two guys you have three guys and then they compare it in comparison to the number of that hasm gave youm gave you 500,000 people and you have one person the chba and the other that uh everything's okay so why should anybody change they came to Yeshua feeling okay they left Yeshua feeling okay in fact they felt even better about themselves because you called everybody sikik sikik everybody sikik sadik even though she forgot to wear clothes even though he doesn't even have a keeper that he owns himself he borrows from the besset every time but everybody felt they were sadik they came in everybody left as a sadik now what that's why no one changed so in sh they judge the speaker accordingly meaning that Hashem gave you an opportunity he gave you a lot and he also gave you the responsibility and if a person doesn't take advantage of that responsibility there is several places in the that it talks about it few places talk about the same thing talks about the you must rebuke your people and thear says if he has the ability if he has the if Hashem gives him the blessing where uh his crowd is his family his family and he doesn't rebuke his family he doesn't tell them the truth he doesn't tell them to stop driving on Shabbat he doesn't tell them that uh modesty is not a me it's he doesn't tell him that kosher is inside the house and outside the house not just whenever you feel like it he doesn't tell them so he just lets everybody decide for themselves and Sh say oh you didn't tell them you knew the the truth you didn't tell them everybody's Dean that's in the family anyone doesn't do CH their Dean is on you also so now poor guy he thinks he kept everything is good he went to he put on he go with and they call him they call him like they call him all these different things why says because you had an opportunity to tell your brother tell your sister tell your uh son tell your wife you had an opportunity to tell them we put them in your life they were in your house house you didn't tell them how are they going to know gar continues and says what about if he has opportunity to influence a whole Kayla he's a rabbi of AET a rabet b Ness has 100 200 people says if he doesn't tell them the dean of the all 200 people is on him they also get but him also now he has the dean of 200 people he goes up to Sham he has the consequence of what happened to 200 different families say what if he's what if he's the biggest Rabbi he has he's a famous speaker he gets thousand people a week thousand people a day some people are so well known they can get three four lectures a week each lecture 500 people what about that guy he say even if he if he has been given the opportunity to speak to the entire world he's so well known that he's speaking to the entire world and he doesn't tell them the truth then the dean of the entire world goes on him meaning that if a person is going to you know choose this profession if you will to teach people Torah to tell people what hasem said he has to think about it twice why because it's not worth it it's not worth it to to do this if you're going to sugarcoat everything and unfortunately today this is what we have as a standard in many places and many you know people are very confused about what's the purpose of life why should I live why should I do chv why should I stay on the D why should I not get off the D and so on and so on why should I do all of this stuff this is what the biggest confusion of the generation people simply have no idea why they should even live today I got a story of a poor 27y old girl I think she was Jewish I'm just not sure uh the only reason why I think she was Jewish is because she says that one of our favorite foods was bomba Americans usually don't eat bomba but she was a uh very uh accomplished um dietitian of some kind or you know in New York she had an apartment in Manhattan and uh she was doing extremely well for herself she was traveling constantly all over the world trying every that she could possibly find but highlighting it for people to follow this diet plan so they could look good and look like a celebrity and she lived what most people consider the uh the life young beautiful lots of money travel at will what else do you want in life well last night she decided to commit suicide and she wrote a note what is the summary of the whole note there's no point to life that's the note I wish I would have met her two days ago two days ago I would have met her an hour before I give her 500 points to life 500 points to life that she never heard of in her life because if she would have heard one of them she wouldn't have killed herself but she lived 27 years in this world she got everything everybody wants what does everybody wants everybody wants money everybody wants to look good everyone wants Fame and Fortune and do all this different stuff all the materialism of the world everybody wants to be in Hollywood she had it she said there's no point she decided to hang herself how many celebrities kill themselves on a yearly basis the people that everybody looks up to every year they have you know these uh these events where uh Oscars and all types of award shows and so on and they usually have like a ceremonial uh filming towards the end of all the ones that died during that year and every year a few of the people that died they didn't die of natural causes they died of on purpose why would the person that everybody looks up to the one that has all the money has all the fame has all the fortune looks beautiful looks this has everything why would such a person kill themselves the reason is is because for the most part most people in the world and by most I mean the overwhelming majority of people something like 99.9% of the world simply do not know what's the point of life now they think they know it and they try to go after it like I used to think I know it and I went after it but when I arrived at the wrong address or I arrived at the right address but it was wrong you start losing the value to life you start realizing I got what I wanted but now what this is what the t is supposed to teach us now there are many people that learn T but they still don't know what the point of life is and sometimes that's because they learn T superficially they learned to like Unfortunately they learned to theoretically to do things you know to keep a few mitv to tell a few nice stories but when it comes to do you believe that Hashem runs the world to such an extent that he's responsible of every single thing in your life including whether the chair is going to break that you're sitting on right now whether the light's going to continue working for the next couple of hours whether the check that somebody gave you today he's a multi-millionaire he gave you a check for $50 whether it's going to clear or not he's deciding that now surprisingly there was an organization that came out with a research about a year and a half ago called nishma research and they said that only 51% of religious modern Orthodox Jews believe this meaning that half of the religious Jews today that are modern Orthodox believe that Hashem actually runs the world to such an extent that he makes sure that everything and anything in your life works the check clears your your Vision Works your bank Works your employees everything works meaning as he's monitoring everything only 51% believe this says a person that does not believe in is worth is worse than an idol worshipper why an idol worshipper even though he's guaranteed G he doesn't insult God to the same extent why because even the idol worshiper has a limit of how many Idols he worships he worships two Gods three Gods Four Gods it's limit he's not worshiping anything that he just wor he has a limit the elephant the cow and the mouse okay so you decide he has three Gods wrong but still it's three the guy that doesn't believe the woman who doesn't believe in have an unlimited amount of gods why the customer came in he's now God why because I have to give this customer everything i p all of me to make sure that I get the money because you think that the the whole the whole thing it's only going to happen if you're good at what you do and if they're if they're going to if you're going to convince them meaning now you're starting to worship the customer then you go to the bank you want to apply for a loan guess what loan guy that that guy that's makes uh $35,000 a year but acts like he makes 35 million the guy going to decide whether you're going to get the law or not he became God now why because you're so worried when you're going about to meet him you wear a tie all of a sudden and a jacket and you start talking appropriately yes yes we have a very good business and it's uh how many employees you have we don't have employees yet well where's your office we don't have an office yet but listen let me let me we have a very very good idea and you're so worried when you're talking to him why cuz this guy is like you feel he's going to decide whether you're death penalty or not if he gives you the loan you get the dean of life no loan he became God and a person that does not believe in literally makes every single encounter they have in their life into God says this is not only horrible it's a constant insult to hem it's worse than the idol worshiper so is supposed to teach us not just the not just the laws but also that hasem is here with us running every single little thing that happens in our life and sometimes the message that we get from different people is not clear it's not clear why because sometimes you have somebody that is going to tell you different things that's going to confuse you or you don't ask the right questions so it's very very important for everybody to always ask the right questions and always look for the answer if you didn't get the answer you want it didn't make sense like for example I asked 20 something years ago I asked the rabbi do they have dinosaurs in the Torah and he told me no I use this as an excuse to not listen to anything else the Torah says I didn't know what the rest of what the Torah said I just knew that if the Torah doesn't have dinosaurs there's something wrong with it that was one of my excuses one of it started a domino effect of excuses of why I shouldn't listen to everything else if it doesn't have dinosaurs something's wrong with it why I saw the dinosaurs in in the uh Museum I saw dinosaurs on TV I saw dinosaurs in Jurassic Park the movie looks real maybe they maybe one of them was real who knows so in my mind my uh teenager mind I was like ah if this guy if there's no dinosaurs in the Torah must be something wrong the reality is there is dinosaurs in the Tora they call but the point being is is that a person needs to know that sometimes you can ask people certain questions they not may not know the answer if you didn't get the answer that you want you have to go look further you have to look deeper and this is what we talked a little bit about last night now this was one of my biggest problems for most of my life is that I had a lot of questions lot of questions I like to think I like to look for the meaning of things and I like to get to some level of conclusion so when I went to different religious figures that I knew whether it was at the betet or you would meet somebody or they would come to my office and I would ask once in a while a question didn't give me an answer or they gave me something that didn't make any sense with no explanation or no Source this fed the fuel of my yet so when I decided that or to listen to my rabbi's advice which is to become a speaker and teach T I decided that no matter what I need to know everything that the average person is going to ask everything that the average person is going to ask which is the same questions that I asked but without sugarcoating it without uh you know being afraid to whether they can handle it or they can't handle it without being afraid of all this and the reason why is because a person can live in their their life for 20 30 40 50 years Without Really ever having a purpose so I started my journey by coming to the United States when I was 10 years old this is about 30 years ago and in Israel we uh were considered a I guess equivalent to Modern Orthodox we went to a uh semi-religious school where we were aipa we wereit but there was boys and girls like it's very common today in the same school even if they're teenagers and uh aside from that again we learned a lot of secular studies also and um not everybody was exactly as religious as you're supposed to be according to but this is how we grew up and we were very uh modern so we came here it didn't take too much to break when you've already made a few leniencies you already played with the gray area one too many times you get used to the gray area now if you ask any Thief any person that's ever stole a lot of money did you intend to steal all that money 99 out of a 100 times no white color crimes I'm not talking about people that are like murderers talking about white collor crimes people that like cook the books on a big company you know they they cheat on their earnings they cheat on their financials in order to inflate their stock they didn't start out that way they didn't start out with the intention of cheating 99 out of 100 times I study this why did they do it they studied it because they said listen when I started the company everything was going good but in order to get the loan in order to get the loan to get better I had to cheat a little bit with the gray area by telling the banker that we are making $10 million in revenues even though we're only making one why because I was expecting 10 million I was expecting 10 million so I wrote what I was expecting instead of what I was actually doing why because if I was tell if I would tell what I was actually doing he'd let me $5 but if I told him what I'm expecting he' let me a million you understand it's a big difference it's a little gray area what ises he care I know I'm confident I know I'm going to make the money and you see it worked out the guy played with the gray area he lied says but he didn't not only didn't go away from it he did it and what ended up happening is it worked out it actually worked out the deal worked out he made a little bit of money now the company is is worth more money little by little E's a few more loans a few more deals and every deal the line the red line goes a little further why because if my little lie my gray area lie on the original application if I didn't do it I wouldn't be here today he justifies it I wouldn't be here today if I didn't lie originally for that million dollar deal there would be no $100 million company so he justifies so so now I want to get another $100 million deal so what so I have to do the same thing so he tells the next company the investment bankers the uh the Brokers all the different companies like listen yeah we're going to make $500 million this year we're g make $500 million this year and they s we're going to Value based on this $500 million and he's thinking to himself there's no way in the world we're going to make $500 million this year it's just that they're thinking I'm going to make $500 million in profit what they don't understand as I meant $500 million in revenues in sales but I didn't say I said we're going to make $500 million it's their problem that they understood $500 million in profits I didn't tell them $500 million in profits I said we're going to make $500 million he knows they understood $500 million in profits and he knows he meant $500 million in revenues but he says this is a gray area it's their problem they misunderstood me it's their problem why it's a gray area you mis understood you should have asked the question the line F just went a little further the year passed Hey where's the $500 million in profits where do you no I didn't mean $500 million in profit you didn't understand me I meant $500 million in sales you silly guy no come on don't be so silly five we're only a three-year-old company wants to make $500 million in profits come on stop joking around the guys are joking around the guy feels like he wants to bury himself why he valued the company when he made an investment something else but he's stuck now he can't get his money back now another step he starts cheating on certain things he knows that there's certain laws in the US where there are certain things there certain write-offs there's certain ways that you can deduct things from expenses there's certain things you can do with the books you could start calculating your inventory as if you sold it you can start calculating inventory you don't even have it yet and so on and so forth little by little the guy starts creating a kitchen in his accounting department he's cooking the books and eventually they realize like many companies one day they announce we're sorry we overstated earnings for the last 10 years uh in reality we don't have $10 billion in the bank we actually have $100 million in the bank and we have $10 billion in debt though we have 10 debt we have if anybody wants to buy the debt we have that and what ends up happening the stock crashes to nothing a few people go to jail and uh everybody loses their money because the stock go there's no no time to sell the stock the go stock goes down 99% before the stock even opens and then there's the uh lawsuits and so on but they said to the guy what happened I didn't intend for it to get this big I just started one way it got a little bigger bigger a little more a little more over time it's uh people were expecting me to win I couldn't disappoint and he justifies this so when a person starts breaking some of the laws that are big laws in Tor whether it's shabat or it's or it's or it's even said anyone doesn't make anyone doesn't make time to learn to each day he's not going to be resurrected with the Dead why why should he he doesn't even know how to how to live a kosher life if he doesn't learn toah every day he doesn't have to learn 24 hours a day but just has to make time to learn to all every day says if you don't make that time you have a serious problem in sh why eventually there resurrection of the Dead you want to be you want to be brought back right how so when a person starts playing with the gray area where he says listen technically this is not like a the worst thing in the world it's like a little sin it's not a big sin he starts evaluating the sins like you evaluate stocks it's like a small sin this is a big sin this is this sin what ends up happening is the line gets further and further the line gets further and further the little sins become bigger sins the bigger sins become bigger sins and little by little he becomes completely secular but he still pretends to be religious why because he still has the keepa he still goes the B on Shabbat and he feels religious in reality though when as soon as he finish the B he goes home he plays with his phone sometimes even watches TV sometimes he'll even drive to messet and feel perfectly fine I remember when I lived in boaron I would say they had at least 100 to 150 cars 100 to 150 cars driving to besset on Shabbat they had a whole parking lot for them that whole separate Park they didn't want to have the parking lot right next to the B so they have a lot right next to the Beet meaning it's like you could throw the rock like right over this little thing that's where the other parking lot was so we don't see it cuz there's trees we pretend it's not there we pretend there's not 200 cars there and 200 Cars you see people coming out with a big keeper with a nice talit bag and you look this how do you know he not CU and he goes inside the Porsche oh not can't count why he's driving on Shabbat you think he started this way no no it's breaking one law and then a little one a little one and you make that so when we came to the United States we were already weak and what ended up happening is that as soon as we found out that the uh schools in America are very expensive even back in those days we figured that it's an American educational system Let's uh joined the American educational system we didn't know that uh as soon as you join Public School you become a automatically and that's what happened me my three brothers all went to public school my youngest brother was still a baby he was two years old but the rest of them went to public school and literally overnight all of the mitv we learned our whole life went right into the garbage the only time during the year we had a reminder that the mitv even exist is on Friday we have K so we say Shalom after we finish Shalom turn on the TV you finish Shalom thank you why they came to say shom yeah somebody comes to house not say sh say shom so they're coming I sit down with you watching TV that you don't think about it you just go Shalom the Angels Came come watch TV we're watching uh Oprah watching Transformers come come good one one let's watch TV be together as you get a little older Shalom you give a sanctify the then you sanctify the car go to the movies go to the club so what ends up happening is that it didn't start this way but it ended this way and you go through life little by little making that line within a short period of time me and my brothers became pretty much full-blown go where simply mitv was just a you know certain reminder that you're a Jew somebody asked where you're from you say Israel where you know which by default means you're Jewish most of the time and uh you know you have the you know on you eat some uh apples with some Das and some other strange food that no one really likes but you feel like you have to do it on P you eat matu with chocolate and you're jealous of everybody else that's eating ice cream because at that in those those days there wasn't kosher ice cream everything had uh was K a lot of things changed in the last 30 years and then on yum you fast and torture yourself how by sleeping for 22 out of the 25 hours you sleep for 22 hours then you go to be for and then you ask everybody during the pray instead of praying ask who donated who donated how much how much did the Sammy donate 20,000 this year because last year was 20,000 did he donate 20,000 this year oh no no this year he did better he did 25,000 sadik what 25,000 this what this gu he drove to why because it all becomes the whole the book of laws of Tor becomes that's why it's like a little bit of a joke among religious people who say if Shabbat was a everybody would keep it it's a reality the we know we don't know so much this was our life and we had many rabbis come to the community come to the synagogues come to the house couple of shim here and there at 17 years old I had a break from college or 18 years old I had a break from college and during that time somebody uh motivated my dad to convince me to go to a uh go to a Yesa for a couple of weeks instead of waste my life doing nothing during the spring break go to I said okay no problem I went I liked it and I decided to do chuva the problem is chuva is not just putting on a eat some kosher and you're finished chv requires learning every day if you don't learn every day it's not going to last so I did chuva and uh started wearing tiit and no keeper I was scared of the keeper TI was easier for me because no one could see it I wor TI and I started laying and I would listen to a few here and there on CD in those days or not CD in cassette tapes you guys know what cassette tapes are you guys know what cassette you guys ever see a cassette tape have to know what I'm dealing with here you guys old enough to be my kids so I don't know so now I uh saw that uh you know I started listening to some shim little by little the shim started becoming less and less on my playlist music was more interesting uh studying in college was more interesting I was interested in becoming a psychiatrist so I learned a lot of psychology I was a good student and little by little started making leniencies for myself why because I didn't have a rabbi and the shim were less frequent eventually I stopped all together so I just I always felt like weird I was the only guy in college I Came In Like A B Chua second first semester I was Mr party boy second semester I'm Mr baluba I'm wearing a TI I keep Shabbat so how do you keep Shabbat in college you simply go to sleep why because there's nothing to do there's nothing to do so one Rabbi would have a kou you go to the kou you hang out there for an hour and a half get some free food and then you go back to your room you have nothing to do because everybody else goes goes parties you go to your room and you're just looking at the uh the walls waiting for you know to get tired enough so you figure okay let's do something what can I do oh you know what next week I'm going to do something better next week I'm going to get a nice case of beer helps me sleep so next week that was I went to the K I said Shalom I went home nice case of beer and that was Shabbat but I saw all my friends they they had a couple of beers with me and they went out and I felt miserable the whole Shabbat so then I said okay you know what I have to have somebody with me so i' have you know a friend here and there will come visit for a little while how long can this last it last Ed exactly as long as it took me to find somebody that I liked and as soon as I found somebody that I liked everything went into the garbage why you make one leniency then another leniency then another Len youcy and all of a sudden you're acting like husband and wife before your husband and wife all of a sudden the fact that she's not Jewish doesn't really matter all of a sudden the Shabbat that you were keeping for the last few months like you know what I'll just keep it once I get married you start giving yourself like to-do list you put Shabbat on a to-do list I'll do it later on I'm too young now I still got to have fun and now I fell off after keeping it for about a year and a half or so I fell off completely and it took me a long time long time to realize this was a mistake of my life the reason why I real it took me a while to to to realize it was a mistake was because I went into business and after uh working for a few people for a couple of years I uh started becoming independent within a company and uh as soon as I became independent I realized that I'm very different than everybody else they like a schedule they like to come to work at 9 and leave at 5: I don't have a schedule I have ambition what's my ambition I want to become a millionaire as soon as possible so they want to go to work at 9: and leave at 5: good for them I'm going to come to work as soon as I wake up so I'll get to work at 6:30 in the morning the only reason it was 6:30 or 7 is because it took me an hour and a half to get to work and I work until simply I can't move which is somewhere around 12 1:00 in the morning so you work from 7:00 in the morning until about 1:00 in the morning you have a pretty good schedule you travel three hours a day to go to work if it's a good uh traffic only two hours you sleep for a couple of hours and do it all over again the next day that was my schedule after doing this for a little while things started working out by uh November of 2002 I broke a company record and the uh president of the company I was working at which was a big firm called Raymond James sent me this letter he sent me a letter telling me congratulations on your record production and he sent me a nice letter and this letter meant everything in the world to me why because somebody recognize how great I was cuz now I have a purpose what's the purpose to be great I made more money than everybody else so I made a ton of money great they have 5,000 people in The Firm this little 22y old little kid just made more money than everybody else I'm the president of a company you know it's a public company send me a personal letter handwritten letter wow six figure month so I have a purpose next month I made a little bit more next month I made a little bit more by August of the next year they sent a list companywide list of the top 25 producers in the entire country and I wrote on the list that's me and I show it to all my clients why because I was on the list I was number three 23 23y old kid is on the list of top 25 brokers in the entire country as far as production not because they liked me because of how much money I was making they like me that's why I was making so much money but nonetheless they like my money too so now at this point that I'm on this list I agree that I'm great they say I'm great I agree so I say I'm so great I'm too great to be here I got to start on my own I'm G to open up my own company and that's what I do at that point once I open up my own firm money continues to grow it gets to a point where every month A bad month I'm making two $300,000 a good month could be over a half a million maybe even a million in uh throughout the years I dealt with a lot of people and I had two types of people in my life I had my clients and I had my employees there was no friends there's nothing in between why there's no time to have friends this time to deal with certain people you could be friendly you could be nice to people but my job was to be great my job was to help as many people as I possibly can so the clients I helped the rich people become richer that was my job they were Rich they wanted to become richer why because that's their purpose in life someone that has the says a person that wants a 100 you give him 100 now he wants 200 you give him 200 he wants 400 give him 400 he wants 800 why that's the way he was created he's never happy with a share as says no person in the world ever died with even half of what he wanted because he wasn't happy with a share so now the person that I'm dealing with is the customer and this customer wants more I asked him how much do you have in the market he says I have a million I have two million I have three million I said okay what's your intentions what are you looking for I said more that's what he wants he wants more that's what they would deal with me they want to make 20% more 30% more 50% more every year because whatever they have is not enough this is why people that are on a Forbes 500 list that have more money than they can spend even in several Generations still go to work every day and not necessarily their day job they're not cleaning bathrooms but they still do deals the guys from Amazon that was worth a hundred billion do before he divorced his wife like a fool that guy he still goes to work every day to try to make more money Warren Buffett that's uh you know it's literally a rock throw away from from the uh from the cemetery he's 90 years old already he's still goes to work every day Bill Gates that already made uh more than enough of a fortune 20 years ago he still goes to work every day it's not the same work they did 10 years ago 20 years ago but meaning they're still working to make more why because when you have the ability you have money the money has to do something because you feel like it has a life it's become part of you the money has become part of you and if it doesn't do anything then you feel like there's no per point to your life so you can say wait there's a lot of fun things to do in life okay so name them oh you want to go on vacation they went on vacation now what go on another vacation okay you go on another vacation now what go on another vacation go on another vacation your whole life is a vacation now what read a book read a book read two books read 10 books read 50 books now what uh get married got married kids had kids now what what else is there what what else what what else is this life supposed to be what what else you do eat eat every food that moves and doesn't move what else you want what else is there to do in life eventually you get to the point it's like okay something has to be the purpose it can't be marriage because I got married divorced five times the guy says got married and divorced I'm an expert in getting married and even a bigger expert in getting divorced the rabbi he goes to the rabbi yeah get married but the rabbi gives him a business card why he says listen when you get divorced call me he get divorce call me why has more money for the divorce he's an expert in getting married expert and getting divorced so he got married got divorced it can't be the purpose of life kids he has kids with every woman he ever saw it's not the purpose of life money he has more money than he can count food does anybody really think that the purpose of life is food that means you're a cow so what what is the purpose of life then what's the point what am I doing here so the guy that has money is convinced that's the purpose to make more why could I could do more what's what else can you Poss what you do I don't know I'll tell you when I get there so he starts donating to different organizations to make himself feel good and he'll put their his name on the building and I'll donate a synagogue and I'll donate a Cancer Center and I'll help a few homeless guys and I'll help a few people that are miserable and so on and so forth and he feels like this is good it's but then he commits suicide why because it wasn't enough he still didn't get to be happy and he still has to go go and constantly make this money do something in hopes that eventually someone will tell him the answer what's the point of life this was the journey that I was on and I believed that I was going to be 93 years old still on my desk making deals buying buildings selling buildings buying companies selling companies firing people hiring people I thought that was the point of life and I had an opportunity to rub elbows with some very very wealthy people and some very miserable people both usually the miserable ones were sometimes rich but sometimes they worked for me too and in essence you get to meet a lot of different people the guys that uh worked with me for a long time as far as the clients you become friends with them you do deals but then you start socializing a little bit you start realizing wow they have much worse problems than me and they have all this money one guy I remember this guy turp had a uh started a a dog food company made a fortune he already died years ago but uh during the years we did business we made a lot of money together and a poor guy turup gave his business to his uh two sons and instead of being grateful one of his sons decided that his father is an enemy everything the kid has is from his father he didn't work a day for it he became CEO overnight but in reality he didn't he didn't earn the job but he decided that his father since his father had an argument with his wife his father's the enemy he didn't want to talk to his father for years till he died so if that's the purpose of life if this kid is the purpose of life your life just lost its purpose so you get to see that some of the money problems that these rich people have problems that the uh poor people don't realize that they have if they knew it they wouldn't want to be rich nobody would want to be rich once you see what kind of problems they have money is never going to solve all your problems it's only going to let you arrive to your problems with a limo that's all it's going to do it's a tool so I learned a lot from my clients about life and I would teach my employees the ones that want to get rich quick they want to get rich over overnight now you can't get rich overnight legally so they always constantly would ask me a different question you know the same question 500 different times of how they can cheat their clients and every time they would get the door slammed in their face because I'm not a thief so every day I said just go to work and eventually you'll be successful oh but we can't they're doing it as the other fir I said yes you'll see eventually they're all going to go to jail and eventually all those other people went to jail there was one guy this uh Thief that worked on Wall Street up the street from us he stole 14 employees from me in one week why he convinced all of them that they're all going to become millionaires in a year and uh doing what he said and so on and so forth and he literally built a monstrous firm in one year he had maybe 300 400 people in one year what people don't build in a lifetime three 400 people in a huge boardroom very impressive he was on TV every other day and it was a very impressive figure until the SEC showed up and said you're all under arrest why does you can't you can't you can't in them all eventually they figure out you're a thief so the young guys that wanted to get rich quick sometimes would leave sometimes would stick around many of them had different problems sometimes they had drug problems sometimes they had marriage problems and different problems so you try to Bey you know a counselor for them but the advice that I would give to them is the same advice that I would follow myself which is the purpose of life is to be successful you know get a wife get a kid whatever it is that you want to do with your personal life but in essence if you're going to actually work just be successful at it whatever it is that you're doing and then you could do other stuff in life whatever you want to donate a building donate a building that was the point to Life Point to life is to make money and go do something with it this is as far from the truth as possible anyone that thinks that the point of their life is for them to have a wife a husband get a few kids make a bunch of money and die this way if you think that's the point of why God created the Heaven and the Earth you're sadly mistaken you sadly have no purpose to that life why Hashem says in the mine is the money mine is the gold meaning all the money that we say it's my money he says what are you talking about it's my money it's my money I'm just lending it to you during the time that you're alive you're just playing with my money it's like you know it's like somebody lets his kid you know he has he has a little bit of cash in his pocket and he leaves on a table and his little three-year-old decides to play with it cuz it's chice for him if he if the father's a normal person he's not going to yell at the three-year-old he's going to let him play with it because for him it's fun so the kid feels like it's his toy now his $100 bill there $20 bill there single there's a couple of coins he feels like it's his money for the time being that's us Hashem gives us a little bit of money that we feel like it's ours but hm says it's mine it's my money so a person thinks that this money is their life that's their purpose they wake up later on in their life realizing that it was all a mistake sometimes it's too late because sometimes they don't have enough of a spine to look for a new purpose like this 20 seveny old girl decided that she H has money she has Fame she has everything that everybody else wants and she's not happy therefore there cannot be any purpose to the world and she decides to commit suicide many people are just like her sometimes the signs that hasem is giving us we ignore and that's what I was doing so I was making money I was doing everything I wanted to do but still never really happy why because I was constantly looking for something else to fix this hole that's inside okay I got the money now in May of 2006 I made $1.6 million for the month plenty enough money to justify going on vacation for a month so in June I decided to go to Las Vegas for 5 weeks I'm still making money from there just working off of you know the phone I don't have to be in an actual office still working but on vacation during the uh day I'm working during the night I'm playing a casino in a World Series of Poker and different poker tournaments because poker became my new fix became my stimulant it became my new game why because it's a mental game and uh it's fun to beat other people and I figured that uh this is um maybe this is my purpose to become the best poker player in the world so I played with the best of them and I beat some of them and I wanted to become a professional but then I realized that my biggest leverage was the fact that I wasn't scared of losing cuz I had a real business while everybody else was scared of losing because that was their business the poker table was their business so I played for a little while I played for a few years I did pretty good but in general continued to work so after I came back from this vacation in 2006 I decided okay so poker is not the purpose I could continue playing but it's definitely not the purpose maybe I should just uh feel better take care of my health so I started eating a little bit better started treating myself a little bit better my body a little bit better and then one day I decided you know what let me have a surgery that uh for this thing that annoys me once or twice a year and uh I went to the doctor and the doctor said listen you know what you can have the surgery it's it's an elective surgery I mean you don't actually have to have it it's not a heart condition but you can have it it's a simple surgery you have the surgery in the morning it's a uh short surgery you leave the same day you don't stay in the hospital we send you home and you uh feel uncomfortable for a few days which in medical terms mean you're in a lot of pain uh and um you go back to work a few days from said how much time am I going to be away from work he says oh maximum three days you I feel uncomfortable for a few days discomfort they call it discomfort it's discomfort why they call discomfort anybody know because it's uncomfortable for them to look at so they send you home so I have have the surgery on a Wednesday morning and I wake up out of the surgery with a different body why my body came into the surgery relatively healthy woke up out of the surgery very very sick something happened during a surgery where they cut some type of nerve they did something to my body where I went through such trauma that the nerves would not stop meaning the pain did not stop stop when I woke up out of the surgery I was screaming my lungs out telling them to stop cutting me and they told me they they said we're not cutting you the surgery is finished and I'm screaming my lungs out because I'm feeling as if they're cutting me over and over again but everywhere in my body not where the surgery was everywhere and I just feel like they're cutting me over and over again and they're starting to something went wrong obviously let's give him some morphine so they gave me some morphine now since I never the drugs in my life no one knew how I would react to them well apparently it doesn't react I got morphine nothing happened so they had to give me more because I continued to scream and ask my wife to kill me ask my mom to kill me ask the doctors to kill me but they didn't want to kill me so they had to give me more morphine instead more morphine guess what it didn't work I'm continuing to scream I'm continuing to yell I'm continue to cry out for my life more morphine more morphine eventually they told my wife we gave him the most amount of morphine legally allowed if it doesn't work at this point there's nothing we can do hasem had mercy on me and it actually worked my body calmed down and I thought that I saw hell and um something that I learned just a little bit about about 10 years before that and I figured okay it's over it's finished there was some type of mishap but it's done what gave me the confidence that it's done they assured me that I'm perfectly fine to go home so he said listen we don't know really what happened but you're fine now right you could walk you could everything's good right yeah go home it's an elective surgery you didn't have to be here even go home relax so I felt so happy this nightmare is behind me everybody that overcomes a nightmare feels happy I go home we pick up a few sandwiches on the way home we eat we laugh about it thank you very much everybody for coming I go to sleep thinking that the worst is behind me not realizing that the worst is ahead of me I wake up 45 minutes later with worse pain than I originally had in the hospital but only this time it doesn't stop for 62 days for 62 days my body continues to be in pain 24 hours a day with no break other than the 15 minutes that I would get a break because I burned my body by going into boiling water you know the type of water that you boil tea in you make tea that's what I would be in and why because that's what I would have to do to numb my entire body with different pain once you have different you you know there's two types of pain two types of pain so you have a headache and you have like something that's much worse than that so I prefer the headache and this would give me about 15 minutes of Peace after that 15 minutes I would immediately pass out 15 minutes later I would wake up with massive pain again as if I just had the surgery all over again and little by little this led me to not be able to sleep for those two months which meant that my body started failing the urine turned to blood the eyes turned to blood the holes that were supposed to contain things started doing the opposite and little by little the doctor says he's dying we just don't know why we have no idea why went to different doctors NYU and all types of fancy schmancy names no one understood what what this had to do with my surgery after those two months the body started calming down to the point where 20 painkillers were enough for the day you know during those two months 100 weren't enough but now 20 pain killers were enough I would take them two at a time just to numb the paint for couple of hours and then every couple of hours I take another couple of painkillers in order to get back to life went back to life somewhat nine months later I feel a pain in my leg the next day I'm in the emergency room they tell me that I have an internal infection called an absess that's in between two muscles that's at a point of exploding that if it explodes and I don't do something about it immediately it would go into my blood system and I would die within an hour we have an emergency surgery but the surgery for this type of uh thing is much worse than the first surgery why this one they actually get you to keep stay in the hospital because you have to be tied to the morphine 24 hours a day you can't be without morphine you have to they give you a little button that every opportunity you get you press it because the pain is simply impossible it's impossible it's intolerable so they just give you a little button and you feel like you have like a uh atomic bomb but for yourself you're hoping the thing blows you up because you can't handle the pain but once the pain goes away for the next you know half hour hour or so you're happy anyway and this goes on for the next few weeks after a few weeks of this adventure go back home go back to life try to go back to the office 6 months later another pain another abscess another infection back in the hospital emergency surgery another hospital visit for another couple of weeks three months later another surgery another absess another nightmare and this is not in the same area keeps happening in different parts of the body which is the problem why you can't diagnose a problem you have no idea why it's happening usually if you have a recurring problem that means it's some deep rooted issue meaning okay so let's say for example somebody has something on their arm and they have a surgery they fix it whatever it is they have some growth and it comes back they say oh that means in the previous surgery we didn't take it out we didn't take out the whole thing we left something behind so they have another surgery now if it comes back again it's like oh there's something wrong here something if it's we can't mess up over and over they have another surgery but if it keeps going back that means that the problem is somewhere else Shalom said that one time he went to a doctor and he told him listen I have a uh a little bit of a uh pain from this uh infection that I have he says let me see your infection and he showed him a red red mark red mark on his arm he says okay take off all your clothes I need to check you goes no no no I just have this infection goes take off all your clothes I need to check your whole body strange he checks the whole thing after he checks goes oh you're fine what do you mean I'm fine you just gave me a heart attack told me check my whole body said yeah I had to check your whole body CU why say because that black dot it either means you have a very serious condition or just means you have a small infection small infection go to the secretary she'll give you a prescription get some antibiotics in two days it's gone serious problem that problem there's no cure for so I have to check the whole body to see if there's other black dots like this and to check your heart to see if it's connected to the heart it's not it's just a small superficial infection just get some antibiotics you're good sometimes a person can have a small little Mark a small little thing a small little issue and he doesn't take care of it it becomes a bigger problem same thing with our life sometimes there's a small issue with the marriage the wife feels like you're not paying attention to her all you have to do is pay a little attention to her all you have to do is take a break on Shabbat stop thinking about business stop thinking about everything else put the phone down put this down and just pay attention to her just on Shabbat and it's fine but you don't why you're busy with the guys you're busy with this you're busy with that so now problem grows the problem grows now she not only doesn't feel like you're paying attention to her now she feels like you don't even love her now here's the problem see a guy doesn't necessarily need to be feel loved all the time he doesn't have that need that desire he just needs to feel loved sometimes just enough time that when he needs it he wants to know somebody's there a woman needs it all the time she needs to know that she's loved you don't necessarily need to say it every five seconds but she needs to know in the back of her mind my husband loves me why because the minute she feels the husband doesn't love her there's no purpose to being married anymore there's no point if he doesn't love me what's the point it started with not paying attention but now it grows that oh not only he's not paying attention he doesn't pay attention to me because he doesn't love me if he doesn't love me I have to find somebody that does why do you think there's so many people cheating why are the people so many cheating guys sometimes they cheat because of Desire very rarely because they're looking for love usually it's because of Desire women on the other hand 90% of the time they cheat because they looking for love not because of Desire they don't have the same desires as men they have them but not the same thing as as men they're looking for love why because at home they didn't get it husband's too busy playing cards with his friends husband's too busy you know going to the game watching the Super Bowl or some other bow he's watching everything else except his wife so what so she's like oh you're watching this I'm looking for a guy that's watching me it started with a small problem small little Mark a little scratch but now he grew to a potential cancer and sometimes that cancer is incurable so the problem with my issues was that my problem was incurable simply because they didn't know what the problem was it kept reappearing at different parts of the body they saw no connection they thought it was a fisha which meant that all of them are connected they checked it a million and a half times which is a very very fun thing to do for them and uh they never found it they never found any connection my life continues to get worse because I'm in pain all the time and now as you noticed the time gets shorter between surgeries to the point where it gets to a point where I'm having a surgery of some kind every month and then I'm starting to go to different doctors I went to over 50 different doctors of all kinds the best ones the worst ones and I send my files to the best doctors in the world at the Mayo Clinic at Cleveland Clinic every Clinic you want the real ones the fake ones in different countries I started taking all types of things uh steroids like the athletes take HGH which is $1,500 a shot much much more affordable when you have the money much less affordable when you don't have the money started taking steroids all they did is ruined my body even worse and I'm constantly looking to cure this disease every doctor gives me a little bit of hope within the first few minutes and as soon as he reads my file which continues to grow eventually gets to a point of being three feet I get to a point where the doctor within a few minutes tells me he can't help me and some of them reject me they don't even want to see me they simply don't want to see no I can't help somebody like you can't help this is too much I have no idea what's wrong with you telling you people that were in a business for 25 30 years their job was to cure people simply don't want to talk to you why because you're hurting their ego until now they felt they were able to cure everything until they saw you this continues for the next seven years life becomes a disaster business goes into the tubes the market crashes at the same time every deal that I did that used to turn from nothing into something is now turning from something back into nothing the people that I groomed to become power Brokers became some of them became very suc successful but they just decided to take that success elsewhere and instead of helping they stole as much as they could possibly get because when the line on top is wounded that's the opportunity to take control everything starts to turn upside down the customers that were very friendly to me says listen we can be friends but business we can't do anymore why you're not in the office you're in a hospital constantly you can't answer the phone you can't do business the deals are going bad we're losing money I'm losing I used to be able to do a $100 million deals $100 million deals meaning I make a few phone calls okay the end of those few phone calls okay Buy $100 million of Nextel Buy $100 million of Ivan home mind buy a $100 million worth of series satellite buy a $100 million worth of whatever you want and a few few at a time did a few billion dollars worth of transactions big money now I'm fighting for life now I'm hoping that maybe I can get just a few million dollars I can just pay the bills the money that I had invested my own money I was my own biggest client I'm losing money even faster than my own clients so now as my World Turns Upside Down I don't feel as great as I used to feel but I'm still ambitious and I'm still fighting because that's me I'm a fighter you don't give up but after you deal with with pay 24 hours a day and the health that you thought you had is taken away from you and then the money that you thought you had has taken away from you and all you really have is problems and all the people that you thought were friendly are not really so friendly you start losing your point of living and I started to do a u accounting of what I actually had and this is what I had I had my wife which was the most wonderful extraordinary person on Earth every day she gave me a reason to live why she made it seem like the Cure is around the corner and the purpose is there you just haven't found it yet and despite the fact that she wasn't Jewish she wanted to be me to become religious she wanted me to become a religious Jew she wanted me to on holiday she would tell me listen I think you should stay home for P you shouldn't go to work I'll work I'll do whatever you need to do you sit home I brought you a t she brought me a t said read it said why she it's your history it's AEM it's God read about him maybe it's going to give you a solution to these problems said you realize this is I'm Jewish yeah perfect become keep me keep your T she brought me my first t I found this a little unusual so I stayed home for p and I read the T that she bought me it's very interesting but didn't change anything why because when you first learn Tor you learn it superficially which means that it's not sweet like it is after you've learned it for a while you learn it like you learned a book and it's interesting and maybe a little bit mentally stimulating but you still don't understand 90% of what it says so you don't really get the point of why does anybody else in the world sit here and look at this book or other books like it the all of our holy books all of our oral T how could you sit there for 15 hours looking at this book you can't even imagine yourself that way why because you looked at the book I read a lot of books in my life before I do do CH lots of books I had a huge library of books that I read secular books all types of topics philosophical books medical books books all scientific books read lots of stuff this was just another book why cuz was reading it superficially without really understanding what's going on so I read it it's interesting but I'm not changing my life because Hashem created Adam and the snake enticed him to sin and eventually hasem gets really really annoyed and he destroys the whole world the generation of Noah okay nice people listen good for you no do you survived what does that have to do with me m sounds like a superhero to me it's bem wow I wish I was like him I wish I knew him but what does it have to do with me you read it the first time you have no idea what's what's okay it's great now what so I read it a little bit nothing changed but as the health continued to deteriorate I started losing my purpose because now my dream of becoming this dealmaker this powerful person that can do a lot of good things that can donate even more money than I was already donating and so on that became more and more of a imaginary dream not a real dream why because what I've accumulated until this point is now running out the window faster than it came in and my ability to continue doing more became impossible why because it wasn't even to work you know I'd work for a couple of months then go to the hospital I'd work for a couple of months then go to the hospital I work for a couple of months then go to the hospital constantly L was just constantly in doctors every week I was a doctor at one point I was in doctors every week I became a part of a study they want to do experiments on my body I became part of a study they wanted to figure out like oh listen at least maybe you could donate your body to science and that's what I did started they started doing experiments on me I said listen the regular doctors can't figure it out maybe the experiment will figure it out I had a toothache one time and the guy uh you know I went to a dentist and you tried to give me Novak and didn't work so he gave me more and it didn't work and he thought he kept missing the nerve and he wasn't missing the nerve it just didn't work eventually the doctor said listen I think you should donate your skull to science at least it can help somebody your body doesn't work eventually it works but some unusual amount sometimes and sometimes it works in a small amount like it's not like it just has a high tolerance sometimes it's a one grain of sugar could change the whole body other times a gallon of sugar won't do anything very strange my mom found out she has the same problem she had a surgery on her teeth to replace her teeth but she found out a little bit too late that it's almost impossible to numb her face so she felt every single pin every single thing that happened already after the fact my brother also has a little bit so we have well I think a little bit aliens say uh what are you Safar Kazi no alien we're a new tradition so now we have a interesting Journey but this journey I'm thinking maybe I'm going to end this journey I can't take it anymore there's no point to life so I started thinking you know what there's no answers there's no point and I got to a point where I became literally suicidal I didn't want to die but there's no cure that's when hasem you know decided that I've reached my end hasem promised us that he's never going to give us a test we can't handle which means that as soon as we get to a point we're at a Breaking Point that's when Hashem gets involved he doesn't want us to break but sometimes it's necessary for us to break in order for us to look up in order for us to look up because our ego is always in the way we always think that we're able to solve our own problems you have financial problems you figure I'll get two jobs instead of one job job one job doesn't pay the bill so I'll work two jobs to pay the bills you look for a wife you figured that you know what I can't find a wife so you know what maybe I'll just date three girls at a time one of them must be right so you start dating you have three different lives and every one of these girls think you're the you're the husband she thinks Jo I'm gonna marry him he a joey Joey's my he's my buddy he's my best he's my husband he's my future husband why because he buys her presents every week she doesn't realize he also buys the other girl presents every week and the other girl presents every week cuz he figures that one of them is going to be the one he wants to help God give him a z so he figures I'm giving you three choices anyone you want so we limit AEM limit AEM and therefore we make stupid choices by overdoing it people call is it's not is means you made the minimum amount of effort that's required just to make it look realistic what we do is an obsession to help Hashem do his job and sometimes we don't believe that hm is going to provide us P to an extent that some people are not willing to have more kids until they have more money so you have many people every week I get calls like this every weeks I I get uh messages like this oh my wife doesn't want to have any more kids why not because I don't make enough money I'm only making 70,000 a year I'm only making 50,000 a year I'm only making 100,000 a year I'm only making whatever I'm making and it's not enough it's barely enough to pay for two or three kids that we have and a dog so we figured that if we're going to get another kid probably have to get rid of the dog but we like the dog he like another son to us so she figured that until I get my raise that's when we have a kid so they decide to keep the dog in not the kid why because they figure that it's I have to have money before I do things they don't realize that each kid comes witha and Tor tells us that if a person simply looks at the first book of the T looks at he sees that hasem commanded us to have children commanded us to try to have children it's the first Commandments the first thing that hasem told now which means that this is in the interest of Hashem hasem wants us to multiply wants us to bring children to the world he doesn't want us to waste seed he doesn't want us to be uh by ourselves for the whole life he wants us to bring children to the world more people do more mitv honor him more serve him more fulfill the purpose of the world we figured listen yeah I know that's what God wants but I don't have the money so I figured that when he gives me the money I'll do what he wants meaning that if a person thinks about it in essence what are they saying they're saying that hasem wants you to have kids but he's going to let them starve to death he told you to do something but he didn't give you the ability to do it he want you to go you know build a family but you don't have the tools to do it which is complete nonsense this makes God into an evil God if you really think about it so when a person has when he's trying to make effort to do certain things he has to know that there's a certain amount that he's responsible for a certain amount that hm is responsible for the more you have the less you do the less you have the more you do if your is at 10% you're going to work 90% if your is at 90% you only have to work 10% but with the rest of the time obviously doing different things you're learning and so on so we figured that we tried everything possible and it wasn't working hasem promised that as soon as I break as soon as a person breaks and gets to that limit he's going to show himself in different ways he showed himself in many different ways but I was ignoring him one day I get a phone call from my mom and she tells me please talk to him talk to him and I say who he says talk to a fine he said who is this a he says it's your cousin I says why do I need to talk to him and why did he make you cry because she was crying on the phone says just talk to him please he could help you I said if it's going to stop you from crying just have him call me I'll talk to whoever you want now called me and I didn't even know who he was but I knew he was my cousin from Israel that I never met and immediately when we started talking we hit it off he started telling me some interesting stories about yud and Tamal and he read the Torah in a different way than I did years ago he read it with commentary I read it literally I read the Torah it said created the world the heaven the Earth that's where I read he had had a different why he had commentary he told me what does that actually mean behind the scenes so I read you there was a you there a someone a story but then he told started telling me the commentary by the sages of why this happened and why that happened and I started realizing wow there's more than meet that meets the eye there's a lot more in the Torah than I ever imagined and I started realizing that he has the answers that I'm looking for my whole life so I started asking him questions we had a conversation for an hour and 40 minutes and he started giving me some answers I ran to my wife after the call I told her I found him she said who said I found the guy that has the answers she said who is it I said it's a f she goes who's a f say it's my cousin she goes keep talking to him I said I don't know his phone number goes how could you not get it I said I don't know he called me so now we're waiting the whole week we're just hoping oh he's Hing he going to call again the next week Thursday 4:00 he calls again I'm as excited as can be why I get I get to ask questions where is their dinosaurs in theah are there aliens what's the point of life why am I sick why am I not healthy why is this why is that and so on and so forth where's the stock market going maybe he knows that too he figure he knows all these other questions might know might as well and the best part about asking him questions is that he's not giving you his opinion he's giving you kaz's opinion he's giving you God's opinion and he's telling you exactly where you could find it yourself you have a question sure somebody else ask this question who he tells you who ask this question great so what did he ask what what did he answer he says look at this book this page I don't have the book okay so I'll tell you you don't have you have you have not he doesn't make you feel bad he goes oh you don't have that book okay I'll tell you what it says in the book and he gives you the page number in case just in case you remember you're going to look for it later on as if you know what to do as if somebody gave you the book you even know where to go why because by the way in Torah they don't have numbers they have letters so he started telling me you know in a uh page uh Shin gim it's uh says I said who page who Shin gim I said yeah you said letters isn't that page supposed to be a number you're saying letters he goes yeah it's G and Sheen stands for 300 and giml stands for three so it's page 303 oh okay so he said so Shin am I said hold on a second you just said Shin what's this Amud bet where does this bet come from he goes oh the page is in in Judaism in our Torah it's not the same thing like secular books where every page is just a number each page is a real page meaning back and forth the front is a is Al the back is bit so it's Shin means 303 backside so you need to be a scientist just to figure out the pages you want me to know all the stuff so now he starts telling me sh this this this start talking me code but every time I I realized very quickly I have no idea a what I'm doing all of what I thought I knew immediately I realized I know nothing in comparison to everybody else that I know I'm Mr genius in comparison to him I'm a the good news is he doesn't see it that way he thinks we're equal he thinks we're equal he's like oh yeah remember in I said what's oh no Shabbat page this and he makes you feel good about it he knows I don't know but he doesn't make you think that you he knows he doesn't know he makes you feel good about yourself so I realize this is special person I don't know anything so I could be one of two things I could be an egotistical and pretend like I know and just say yes yes sure of course yeah of course yeah who doesn't know who doesn't know this no of course no should have prayed more for for the people sadik of course you pretend like you know or you can go back to being a kindergarten child with no shame whatsoever to ask every single question a million times until you get an answer that you understand and until this day years later this is how we learn if I don't understand I ask the question again he says another explanation I don't understand I ask the question again in a different way to to to explain what I don't understand and he explains it again in a different way I'm not like the that was a student that had to ask every question 400 times not 400 times most things I understand first time out but sometimes it takes a few times this is one of the things that was a secret to learning killing your ego all that you know is meaningless you have to ask questions in order to get knowledge most people don't have that most people simply want to pretend like they know and sometimes I meet people and I start talking to them and you know they start nodding the whole time yeah yeah I know I know I know I know I know so that that conversation usually ends very quickly why if they know everything what's the point of the conversation if you want to learn T immediately you have to act like a baby you don't know anything even if you heard it before by the way you should know for for for ethical reasons our sages teaches that even if somebody tells you a story that you heard you shouldn't interrupt them and tell them I know the story let him finish the story and pretend like it's the first time you ever heard it for two reasons number one them teaching you the story is helping them so why are you going to ruin it for them if they figure that maybe you never heard the story they prepared the story they finally give you the story you tell them no no I heard it after three words the guy's like ah everybody knows everything I know so I might as well stop teaching the second reason is you know your version of the story maybe there's something that he's going to tell you that you never heard before so don't assume you know the whole story back and forth like you think you do maybe there's something you don't know there's another facet to the story that you never heard before that he's going to tell you now so you should never ever interrupt anyone giving you the other things you can you know if somebody wants to give you the the menu again after you read it you don't have to listen to the whole menu all over again talking about so I realized very quickly I didn't really know very much and I was going to ask every question every question that I can anything I didn't understand from literally from what does this word mean even though I was born in Israel I only got a fourth grade education you know we left Israel when I was in fourth grade so it's been a long time I didn't go to Yeshiva I didn't start I didn't studyes in so many words I didn't speak Hebrew for 25 years so even the fourth grade education that I had was not really so uh I didn't remember all of it so a lot of times you would say certain words say what does that mean what does this word mean like I was learning Hebrew all over again and I started looking at the Sido and I said I have no idea what I'm saying I could make the sounds like 90% of people but I have no idea what I'm saying so he bought me a nice sedo that has something called translation so I would read the Sid make the Sounds in Hebrew but the translation was right under the word so I would know exactly what is this word mean and I was as I would pray I would learn also Hebrew again all over again now since I had some basic knowledge this helped but nonetheless in the beginning it was a nightmare because he had a mission I just didn't know it his mission was to teach me Hebrew as if I never left is so you'd say okay no come on so read what it says in the PUK I said you read it goes no no come on you have it you have it in front of you so I would open the book I would open a t I would open a and I would start reading like I'm in first grade and he would have all the patience in the world to wait for me to finish the sentence and I feel as embarrassed as can be why I'm not 12 years old and I'm reading like I am though or six years old but he has the patience and he's waiting and little by little I'm thinking why do you have me read it's embarrassing for me he goes no no continue reading continue reading little by little I wasn't reading that way anymore the point is is that since I saw that this special person had the answers I needed I didn't mind dealing with a little bit of embarrassment and didn't mind dealing with a little bit of toil and in mind shutting down my office every Thursday at 4:00 because R FR is calling and as soon as R FR calls the world might as well blow up it doesn't make a difference to me my wife becomes my bouncer she blocks the door no one's allowed to come in she goes yeah yeah but we're looking for something said look somewhere else he's studying with he's studying with how long is it going to be an hour two hours she goes maybe seven hours they startop looking what do you mean seven hours what do they do for seven hours they learn Torah he learns Torah Jon's learning sh talk we talking about the same person Wall Street your own is learning toah 7 hours Wall Street your own is learning toah for seven hours after doing this for a little while I started keeping MIT and started realizing that I have a problem in my life the fact that my wife is not Jewish but again you can't stop making somebody believe something so I had to find out what's the truth is Christianity true is Judaism the truth which meant that I had to study both subjects now very quickly I realized that Christianity is complete nonsense I honestly don't understand how two billion people believe this but um this was easy for me to figure out why it wasn't spoonfed to me for 30 years for me I was looking from the outside from the outside you could always see the problems if you're the one that's fixing the house it's very hard for you to see that there is like little scratch over there and a tiny one over there and the light bulb is missing over there why CU you're close to it so you're not going to pay attention to the small details but what of your friends comes for the first time and he sees all the all of the missing go by the way you know there's a scratch over there right and a light bulb and all of a sudden he sees everything clear it's very annoying by the way but aside from that it's like how did you see all that I'm here the whole week I didn't see the light bulbs missing go I'm I'm an expert it's not because he's an expert it's because he's coming from a different perspective perspective he's coming from a different perspective so I came from a different perspective I came from the outside from the outside is very very clear to me to see that it's a man-made religion full of mistakes full of complete nonsense contradictions and so on but still you can't make somebody else just agree with you they have to see it just because you see it doesn't mean that they're going to see it and that's the mistake that a lot of people make when they do chuba they think that just because they got the spark in their head and they see that Hashem is real and no one can convince them otherwise that doesn't mean that their wife or husband sees the same thing even if you show them the same paper here honey look it says over here this thank you doesn't change anything for me why because what's going to spark for you what's going to make you spark doesn't necessarily mean it's going to make them spark either and that's when when people ask me what would I do to get my spouse or or my children or somebody to to jump on a bandwagon what can I teach them said teach them to learn every day teach them a every day give them a give them a five minute clip a 10-minute clip you give them a three-hour clip they're not going to watch it give him a five minute clip give him a 10-minute Torah clip and don't do it yourself have somebody else do it give the rabbi the job to do it don't do it yourself why because you most likely not going to accept your teachings because you're new at it so they don't really respect it from you but if they learn it from somebody else is much more likely to work because an outside perspective so send him a clip a video of this shoe that's five minutes out of it that motivated you and you send it to them every day five minutes from this Rabbi five minutes from that Rabbi see what works little by little they're going to want more why because once you feed them something every day eventually they're going to press click eventually they're gonna start liking it and eventually they're gonna want more that's the only way if you try to just make bet everything only on one thing you're taking a very big risk and the reason why is because if it doesn't work and you bet everything on it not only are they going to lose hope that they're hopeless you're going to lose hope that they're hopeless and that can lead to divorce so many times when one person did chuva and they think that the same thing that caused them to do Chua is going to cause their spouse to do Chua or their kids do Chua they're mistaken usually it's going to be something else so since you don't know what some that something else is give them a little bit of everything give them a little bit of Torah and science give them a little bit of M give them a little bit of sh you know have somebody guide you of what to send them and every day give them a little bit get them used to receiving tah every day and hope that they actually press play or read a little bit a few times week that's what you should pray for every day so as I was learning more and more I started teaching my wife more and more she liked everything I was learning I liked everything I was learning everything was great the only problem was that we were both born to different religions now and we were both under the belief that if you're born this way you're born this way my Rabbi asked my Rabbi he goes no there's many people that are considered some of the most righteous people in history that started Asim on Kil every Kash that has commentary depends on onos why he's the original commentary before Rashi onos was next in line to become the Caesar he was next in line to become the Caesar and he found the emit he found the Torah he realized it's complete everything that he learned up to that point is complete nonsense the Torah is emit these slaves these poor Jewish people they have the truth I want to join them but it's a big decision so what did he do the says that did a seance and he brought three in those days it was very very easy actually to do a seance today but it's not allowed by the way he did a seance and he brought three he brought his uncle Titus he brought or great great uncle Titus he brought bam and he brought Jesus what we also call JC Penny now he brought all three of them and he asked them who where are you they say we're in a different world because what does it look like in this uh this world who's who's the leader over there who are the important ones there says is the most important here he says uh but here they're not important he goes yeah the world is upside down this world that you're living in it's a world of Lies complete nonsense the real world am is is the leaders says well uh what about you what happened to you they tell them oh each one tells them about the punishment that they're in Titus because he desecrated the BET mikdash and he thought that hasem cannot uh beat him he told people listen when I die take my ashes and split them all over the ocean all over the ocean so hasem if he ever wants to take revenge against me he can't cuz I'm all over the place so Titus said to him he goes yo I was wrong why cuz now hasem every day he hasim collect all the dust of my ashes from all over the sea put me back together and then burn me all over again then split me all over again and then do it all over again over and over again that's my punishment then he asked Bam Bam who's the leaders over there he says am is the leaders says so should I convert says no it's too hard for you you come from royalty same thing Titus told him you come from royalty you can't hang can't hang with the Jews they're too much they have a Torah too many laws it's too much why don't you just uh live as a kill a bunch of Jews because at least you'll you'll enjoy one world and then after that when you come to the next World you'll join us and suffer says where are you he tells them no me they're burning me in a different way because he his wife was a donkey they are burning him and all the seed that he wasted then he ask Jesus know where are you JC Penny no he's not in JC Penny he actually went to Macy's no he uh he says to him no the leaders are I'm is and um you should convert you should convert he says Where Are You Because all me they're burning me in feces because why are they doing this to you you told me to convert obviously you you were born a Jew so how come they burn you over there he says because I went against the Torah I went against the rabbis when you go against the rabbis like going against the Torah itself it's it's like going against hem My Punishment is eternally to be in so got from and he decided to convert and give up becoming the next Caesar be give up becoming the next king another very famous convert is from the family of RAB AKA RAB AA that's always all over thear he comes from converts both of them lived in a generation of the but even before them there was the Z is several Generations before them there was were the heads of one was the head as the uh Prince the n and one was the head of the S both of them were converts themselves and they were the rabbis of H H is a k you know so you see that many many important people throughout Tor were converts then we found out that is actually T the that we get the t is named after a convert by the name of one of the most important people that ever lived in history is and the Tora which is the climax of the entire Tor it's not called it's called why because we all have to learn from what didn't need too much convincing his whole life he worshiped different Idols not because he was some crazy person he was constantly looking for the truth as soon as he saw one Idol was fake he left it threw it in the garbage didn't try even the second time started something else didn't work out left it threw it in the garbage start something else over and over and over again as soon as he heard about am is and what Hashem did for them that was enough that was enough for him to leave his job leave everything and go to mount saai and become a Jew to Simply listen to one and become a real Jew that's what we're supposed to hear supposed to listen t one time you get the truth somebody tells you is this don't ask too many questions so now is one of the most critical people that ever lived lived another one is the mashia mashiach hasn't come yet but he's coming soon mashia comes from a convert Ruth Ruth of moia Ruth the moabit also a convert so we learned this we said oh so conversion is possible but again what do we do with what's the process of conversion so we thought maybe we'll do uh conversion online we're busy people we have a business we have this we looked conversions online and say uh Rabbi Stacy Jones I said Rabbi Stacy kind of sounds kind of weird Rabbi I never I never knew that a rabbi is a woman Rabbi Stacy does conversions online all you have to do is send $150 and you're converted I says this sounds more like a dog certificate you know dog certificates you don't have to even show the dog you just ask for the certificate they send certificate in the mail it's conversion reform conversion same thing Stacy can convert you online you don't even have to know you so he realized this a nonsense okay so what do we got to do we got to convert this other ways so we start making some phone calls we ask rabim he actually uh introduces us to uh Rabbi Danielo which was a which is a famous Mission counter missionary Rabbi who used to be a missionary actually we talk to him and he tells us no listen if you are in New York talk to this bed in New York they'll help you out tell them I uh I gave you the um information and they'll help you so we got the information we called the bedin we met with the bedin they told us all the different things that we need to study all the different things that we need to do we went back to RAB FR we said we need to know all of this stuff so okay let's start studying for this now we've already been studying with r FR for a couple years now so now we're studying we're studying we're studying and again even before all of this happened happened we had to make sure that this is all going to go through problem is that part of the requirement is that you have to say that you don't believe in anything you believed in before that's the problem why I didn't have a pre-existing belief my pre-existing belief was nonsense my pre-existing belief was that pretty much that God is there he runs the world but uh when it comes to me I can just do whatever I want because I'm a nice person I believe God created the world but maybe went on vacation maybe has other problems to deal with so for me it was relatively easy for my wife it was very different why because she was spoonfed some nonsense her whole life and you can't just undo it so we had to learn about Christianity to figure out if there's mistakes if there's some way to disprove it prove it whatever it was at some point we uh found a uh debate by uh Rabbi tovia singer I watched a bunch of them I love them I learned a lot from them and but when I brought them to my wife she says that she couldn't connect to it and even though somebody could be a fantastic speaker and very knowledgeable doesn't mean that you'll connect to them sometime your Nama requires something else some people love the things that I say and some people can't stand it doesn't mean that what I say is wrong it just simply means that some people just don't connect to it now I have to look for somebody else we ask ref fry him a bunch of questions he gave us the answers but it was still insufficient we needed more eventually it came across RAB M RAB Ys misi had a debate with a Christian uh Professor I watched it I was enamored unbelievable I brought this to my wife she didn't connect to it she didn't connect to it this didn't work so now I'm running out of options by the way I'm still sick the business is still going downhill but at this point it doesn't really matter anymore why I have a new mission in life new mission is to save her why cuz at this point I realized that Christianity is not a second best Christianity is outright fake idolatry it's just idolatry so at this point I know it's idolatry but she doesn't she still believes in something it's like every Christian by the way believes in a different religion no two Christians have the same belief so she had like her own version of Christianity she believed that maybe this Jesus guy was like a nice person that's it she didn't believe he was God she didn't believe it was the son of God she never believed that stuff she didn't believe in the whole new testate she just believed he was like a nice person but if you went against him and you don't believe in him then you're doomed because that's what they teach you so how do you undo it so now you have to show that this is even this is nonsense so by investigating enough about Christianity I realized this very quickly but I had to convince her I can't convince her CU I'm not the vessel The Vessel has to be somebody else eventually I find another video called Torah and Science by RAB RAB MRA again we watch Torah and science the first part both of us are flabbergasted it's unbelievable new proofs that we never heard of scientific proofs of God both of us are amazed then we watch another part we're both amazed again but at this point my wife says listen it's amazing I know the Torah is true but I still need a sign I still need something that's like God telling me this is what he wants me to do the next day we watch the third part of this video which was really part two and she gets her sign what's her sign we get to a verse in the book of Deuteronomy where hasem tells us that after we get to the end of the days were going to sin against them by going and worshiping other foreign Gods the god of stone and the god of wood now Stone obviously represents Mecca where all the Muslims are wood represents the cross where all the Christians are prey to so this sounds good but maybe it's a coincidence but through this Torah and science video which is in all those bags for anybody wants to take one of the bags it's free there a bunch of C CDs in it and it has one of the videos in it one of the DVDs is copy of Torah and science now here he shows us that not only is this verse very interesting and very similar to being a representation of modern day's biggest religions but he Al also shows the Torah codes actually show that the name Jesus and the name Mecca both appear through Torah codes inside this verse it's the only place in the entire Torah they appear which is inside the verse that talks about about them so when a person looks at this with a unbiased eye meaning he's not looking for his own answer he's looking for a answer it's not like one of these people that put the Target on the electricians what they do is they draw the Target and then they draw the circle around it wherever the target is no no he is looking for the actual answer if you're unbiased this is as clear as day for me it was for her even more so at that moment she says I want everything this was more than enough I realized that Christianity is complete idolatry it's complete nonsense that's it we have to learn everything and do everything at that moment the conversion process speed sped up drastically and again new mission in life or the mission in life transformed again now we're not only learning that uh we didn't just meet God now we want to do what he said so now they tell us listen one she converts you know that uh you have to get married you can't you have to get married all over you have to have said okay great so can we have like uh when it's the same day same day so have the same same day but throughout the story there are constantly new Miracles happening and my health starts deteriorating and then improving then deteriorating then improving we're constantly getting tested left and right but we stay strong little by little we overcome this we finished conversion finished the marriage decide to go to Israel for a little while go spend some time with r fry we have the there learn some more over there for a little while then decide to come back here but with a plan to get out of here get out of New York start a new life somewhere else but moving is not so easy I still have the business going even though the business has gone down by 99% there's still something left there was enough left that even 99% still didn't kill the whole thing still enough money that were we still have a you know at that point maybe a uh somewhere close to a million dollars left of our own money and a little bit more of client's money so we're still okay relatively speaking I felt poor because there was so much more before that but and I wish I had it today anyway we figured okay let's uh you know let's let things go I continue to learn once in a while people ask me questions I answer the questions from what I learned I don't really know very much but whatever I learn it happens to be what people ask me about gives me knowledge and what I learn is exactly what people want to know and my Rabbi tells me that listen you have to start spreading this information you have to start teaching I said teaching who he says teaching people I said I don't know anything says no no don't teach anything just teach what you know don't teach everything teach whatever you know you learned something this week teach that so anytime I would go to they would tell me listen why don't you say something so I'd start talking sud for five minutes 10 minutes and I saw it's affecting people they like it they like the story they like this they like that said I liked it but still I never in my wildest dreams thought I was ever going to leave the world Wall Street world and join uh this world this wasn't even a uh joke eventually we decide to leave New York move mov to Florida we originally lived in boaron and uh shortly after I moved I decided to start a weekly sh in my house first year was with one person me and Nissan this guy named Nissan I told Nissan here's the deal I'll tell you what God Said you do whatever you want but at least somebody's going to tell you said okay no problem so first year we have we talk with this he likes it second shoe we have three people two people in front of me one guy on the phone cuz he couldn't make it one of them was this guy named Danny who became a rabbi Nissan and this other guy named toml Tom's on the phone and then eventually actually showed up too so on a second Sho I tell him listen by the way you know there's an in the r what say R in shabat the last Al in Chapter 30 says the following that that someone that violates Shabbat is considered 100% an idol worshipper now if somebody's considered an idol worshipper obviously you can't count them in Manan meaning that if you go to B and there's only 10 people that's a minan but one of them you know he drives on Shabbat you can't count him as one of the 10 from why because the says that he's considered an idol worshipper so Nissan looks at me funny goes wait wait what do you mean if he drives to sh I said if a guy drives to sh on Shabbat that means he's violating Shabbat and at that point Al calls him an idol worshipper he says I've been driving to sh for 25 years nobody ever told me this he goes are you sure I said yeah it's it's also in say where what's the what is it a menu says no no is the it's all so there's a few other sources in you have it in says says that anyone can write a get a kosher get except if they're deaf or they're drunk or crazy person or they're minor or they're slave or they're an idol worshipper or they're a heretic or they are said it says another place say where else says if somebody loses something if a Jew loses something you have to return it if you have signed you find a wallet the wallet has an ID you find it you see an ID you have to return this to the Jew but then says something different says you have to return something that you lost that has the signs that you know who it belongs to to a Jew even if he's a rash even if he eats non kosher food because he just feels like it he says but if he eats noner just to make everybody angry to make God angry he's considered like an aicos like a heretic and Heretics or Idol worshippers or a are considered go which you're not obligated to give them it's not allowed to even return what they have why because their Dean is like a the is like an is not a regular a that's actually a idol worshipper an idol worshiper you're not allowed to return his stuff a regular righteous you should return his stuff because but if he's an idol worshiper you're not allowed to return his stuff if you found it another place says the same thing says a Jew that's a heretic even to worship an Idols or to violate Shabbat even if he's not violating the uh biblical sins even if he's violating the rabinal sins but it's in public people know that he's playing with his phone playing with a phone is a rabinal sin it's not a Biblical sin but he's violating the the rabinal sin everybody knows he is considered what's he's like somebody that worships the Stars worships idols and so on and it's says that in other places all over the the seven places I believe in there are count Place countless places in a there it's all over the r it's all over the Z it's 12 places in the Tora it's all over the place so Nissan just got a shock of his life why because Nissan has been driving to sh for 25 years Clockwork he goes every day to sh he puts on puts on puts on everything everything on Shabbat just no since he lives a little bit far he drives it's only a 15minute uh drive on Shabbat nice parking lot right next to the sh it's convenient and everybody knows he drive why because he drives some of the people there with him some of people he takes home and so on and so it's not like it's a secret everybody knows the rabbi knows K knows everybody knows why cuz there's 200 other cars in the parking lot he's not the only Nan is not the only driver in a Sho that nobody knew and he's not hiding this was in his eyes 100% alloud now he got a shock of his life he says what do I do I said well the first thing is stop driving goes yeah but I'm going to go to sh he said don't go to sh what how I'm going to pray I said pray at home there Ten Commandments one of The Commandments is keep Shabbat there's no commandment go to sh there's no commandment you want to go to sh live closer and he decides to keep Shabbat this gave me a lot of motivation why because I see that this stuff that I don't really know very much but what I know is actually helping other people so it must be that other people also don't know little by little we decide to spread this information we put it on YouTube we put it on all over the Internet a lot of some people find out about the sh from different places they start asking me to come to New York come to Los Angeles come to different places and we go to different places we start this week Sho little by little the uh little bit of money that I had left becomes even little the 100,000 the million dollars becomes 250,000 but 250,000 is still plenty of money the only thing that's going good is that the shim are getting much uh there's much more people goes from one person to three people to 10 people to 15 people to 20 people and then somebody says about me so it goes back to one person to five people to 10 people to 20 people and then somebody else some other Rabbi says so it goes back to one person and 10 people to five people to 10 people I built the sh about 20 times by now why because what happens is I get them to do Chua that's my job people do Chua they come to they listen to they listen to actually realit they do CH what do they do when they do cha they go to go to beet and they keep saying you know Rabon says this and Rabon says this and Rabon says this and Rabon says this and everything Rabon says it's the opposite of what you're saying so what does the rabbi do no no don't listen to RAB your own he doesn't know what he's talking about yeah but he said he said he said he said he said sources no no no he doesn't know he's new he's new he's new he doesn't know he doesn't know and they can now since they see him much more often than me they see him seven days a week they see me maybe once what happened eventually he influenced them they stopped coming to the sh so I sent him to the sh and they stopped going to the sh and little by little they become again sometimes they actually stay strong once in a while the key is that you still have to continue you still have to do what you have to do because there are many people all over the internet hasm created the internet to make a lot of MIT and make a lot of ss you have a choice you could press a button and get by pressing a button why because you take you listen to a you get motivated you send the Shi to to somebody else that somebody else can be motivated to do chv and send it to somebody else he does Chua send it to somebody else he does Chua next thing you know you have 20 under your belt 20 people CH because you watch one shoe and decide to share it on the other hand you could not press the button instead press a button that goes to some uh site that you're not even allowed to think about and a person can lose a lamba it's very easy to lose lamb so when I realize that you could actually get people to Simply change without much effort all you got to do is tell him the truth that's it all you got to tell him this it's WR over here you want to argue argue with God it's here no problem God's willing to argue with you if you want one-on-one just go have to go up there though you have no you can't blame me I didn't I'm just reading I'm just reading what he said you have a problem you have a problem with God you have a problem with Al you have a problem with and so on and so forth and now little by little people start realizing that a lot of the suffering that they have is because of themselves because of their own actions and that's why the inat says that there is no death that comes to the world without some type of some type of transgression and there's no suffering without sin so now a is an unintentional sin and a Aon is an intentional sin so here we see that it's very unusual a that's unintentional leads to death whereas an intentional sin leads to suffering you would think it's the opposite you would think an intentional sin should lead to death an unintentional should lead to suffering no death is an easy solution when a person does an intentional sin Hashem wants to give him suffering why because if he gives you death does no fixing you there's no fixing why a person that does intentional sins he goes to sh he goes to a place he can't come out of where if it's unintentional it's different story different story different level of magnitude you start teaching people that all of the suffering they have in their life all the suffering that I had in my life there had to be a reason for it you start evaluating what you were doing what you believed and you compare it to what AEM said he starts saying oh wait that didn't do that I didn't do that I didn't that's not good to do and you start realizing wow I have a lot of ex's I have a lot of negatives on my list now you don't know which one in particular caused caused the sickness you don't know which one in particular caused the money loss you don't know which one in particular caused the divorce or caused the kid to die or caused the partner to die or cause something you don't really know what caused what you just know you weren't okay with AEM it's very easy very easy to look at the list and think no no it's not relevant because you don't feel like doing it but if you look at it with unbiased eyes and you look at it honestly say saying you know what this the list what I need to do even the stuff that I'm doing I'm not doing it like I'm supposed to and then you start doing so say okay I gotta do I got to do something about it I got to fix it can't fix everything all at once I got to do something so little by little this is what we did we started fixing and one of the things that helped me fix is helping other people fix so aside from giving lectures I started sending packages to people sending people different information that I read that I listen to that motivated me hopefully it motivates them too and for years already I've been sending out CDs of RAB MRA rabim Rabbi other rabis zir Cohen other rabbis that I'm familiar with that I thought were very good uh sh on the internet we started a uh page on Facebook and so on and so forth and little by little this kiru became an actual organization that today we call it's a nonprofit organization that all we do all day 24 hours a day is K now today it's more than just me we have we have some that learn we have some people that we help them study every month it's a real organization that uh does a lot one of the things we do is we fight Christian because Christianity Today is more dangerous than it's ever been before in the past Christianity simply was a one-way Highway if you don't become a Christian they'll simply kill you that's it today they're not threatening to kill anybody they're not threaten to kill anybody why because they pretend to be just like you they tell them they tell you no I'm Jewish too I just believe in Yos we're Jews also we just we just believe in Yos also we believe in J peni they make you feel like it's okay to de in a little bit and before you know it you're uh two feet in and you don't even realize it and they're doing it in a very very blunt way in your face there are several organizations that are very very dangerous because they're actually getting people to buy into this and we're losing at least a couple of hundred Jews every week just in Israel alone in America probably three times that probably three times that are converting to Christianity are becoming Idol worshippers this is mainly because of a few things number one we're an ignorant generation we don't know anything so when somebody tells you have you ever heard of the suffering servant it's like oh sounds like a really righteous person it's like yeah this is the forbidden chapter in the prophets called Isaiah 53 and the guy never even read the tanak never read the never read never read anything he just knows a few superficial stories despite the fact that he has a keep on doesn't mean much keep it's a piece of threads on your head doesn't mean you're you're you're a learned person and they mentioned to him Isaiah 53 Daniel 9 and all the types of things that are very vague and they start describing something to he like oh this person sounds like a really nice person a really good person I really this person and they convince him to admit himself to something that he doesn't actually believe why cuz he's ignorant it's much easier to convince an ignorant person than a known a knowledgeable person that is the foundation of Christianity from day one you look even at the own new testament who are the original students who are the original members of Christianity a bunch of illiterate morons that's who are the original guys why it's much easier to convince somebody who doesn't know anything and that's what they're doing every day we're an ignorant generation the second reason is because even the ones that want to learn they learn things that are not impactful they learn things that are not necessarily always relevant to their day-to-day life they learn things that make them feel that they're okay regardless of what they do which is not true half of the Torah talks about consequences of not doing what hasem said we have a few in the Tora that say some really horrible things if anyone would just simply read them they would immediately do cha because what hasem said he's serious about we may not take it seriously but he's serious and what he said is not going away he didn't like change his mind at some other point so with that being said people even that come to ISU they come to is and they list they learn about mikdash it's very nice to learn mikdash but we don't have BET mikdash right now what's that going to do for my life how's that going to help my marriage how's that going to get me close to so this this is a problem a lot of the are just simply not relevant to a lot of people they're not learning day-to-day M all of this is what is trying to fix what we're trying to do is number one we're trying to make the ignorant knowledgeable by telling you exactly what it says in the book telling you the opinions of the sages telling you what hasem says his opinion no sugar coating I don't really care what you can handle and what you can't hand handle it's not for me to judge I'm not a prophet or a son of a prophet people that tell you no I'm I didn't tell you the whole thing cuz I didn't I wasn't sure if you can handle the truth what makes you think that you can handle and I can't well you're better than me your Jewish n is better than my Jewish what God wrote the Torah just for you and me He excluded I have like a kid version of the Tor what I have like a special education version of the Tor you have the AP advanced placement T I have special education what look what it says look what it says AEM says when we didn't do what he said he punished us horribly says in the Tor why you why you want to teach me that don't decide for me what I can handle I can't handle so that's the first thing I don't know and I don't care what you can or can't handle I'm G to tell you what it says why because I know that Hashem knows what he's doing if you wor in the Torah that means you need to know it second thing is spreading that information everywhere for free why because money is a big for people big yet for people so you want to donate you're more than welcome to you don't want to donate I'll donate to you here there's about $5,000 worth of stuff in those bags I wish somebody would actually take them why because that's Torah knowledge that's actually investment into the community somebody wants you don't want what can I do I bring a horse to water you can't make him drink most important thing is teach to teach you things that are actually relevant to your life and we'll finish with this story there were one time two kids two little kids in Russia both homeless both y both orphans parents died both were walking around the streets homeless and miserable but what can they do Russian guy sees them guy which was very rare in those days especially the days of the Communist in those days their number one job was to kill religious Jews in every way shape or form either kill them physically or kill them spiritually whatever they could do to kill them they hated God more than anything else in the world to find a religious Jew in the Old Country very difficult they found one and this Russian guy saw these two kids their shoes were like slippers but they weren't really slippers what made them look like slippers they both had open mouths both had open mouths and you could see the toes both had holes in their uh pants that you made them think they was shorts even though it's freezing outside both had clothes from the earlier Century both were looking at an apple but they couldn't buy it because they didn't have a penny to their name so Jewish n sees two little poor kids what does he do wants to help them says where are your parents you don't have parents you don't have any money no we don't have any money come I'll buy you I'll buy you the he buys them an apple he buys them each the Apple goes where do you live goes we don't have a house go come with me I'll take care of you I'll take care of you one condition what you learn toah you want to learn toah yes well anything feed us give us a house learn why not okay that's the deal you learn T everything's good what's your names I am AR you know your mom you know your dad don't know okay what about you I am y y okay you're now with me so he took care of them s to learn a little bit of t little by little you know you feed them you teach this that the other thing they went to Yesa they learned eventually they both grew up they got married they both went to America one day somebody comes to this old man this old Russian man now now he's old he says uh T talking to him he says listen we have some people that uh we need to raise some money to uh do some K teach teach some people Tor you could help maybe goes oh yeah well I I've been doing this my whole life helping people learn Torah oh yeah who no I have kids a couple of kids I don't know where they are now but I know there was a couple of kids that I raised for many years I raised them for many years and uh they're in America now he says what what's their names I'm from America what's their names because one Isler and one is he says what you mean the Lakewood built all of Lakewood the most religious community in America and in the world 5,000 students you KOB and his son is gor also you raised them I don't know this uh people you say that's what I know became in America for what just a little bit of K A Little Bit Of Care somebody going out of their traditional stuff that they're doing and decides you know what let me do something for somebody else even if I don't see a direct benefit out of it who knows what could be maybe the next CD you give or the next person you bring to sh could be the next of kitki maybe the next person could be the S maybe could be arler who knows what it could be the point is that if each one of us takes the initiative to do some type of cube some type of care for you could change the world any questions I think after I shut off the camera there's going to be a lot of questions but usually when I ask when there's any questions nobody has any questions but the scho thank you for learning with me hopefully next time there's going to be a little bit more people but uh the sh will be on the internet tomorrow night uh tomorrow we have a sh in Aventura it's a different sh altogether it's our series about uh it's in the breast up Center breast center in uh in aventur it's about 15 20 minutes from here which I know for Florida people is a lot of time but it's really not you know in New York just to go to work is an hour and a half each way so when I say 15 minutes it's to me it's like going to the store but I know for Florida people 15 minutes like far it's like far so don't worry the car can reach there you can actually go you go on a highway you get off Exit 16 you make a left you make a left you make a right you're there [Music] n oh [Music] [Applause] [Music]