What Does Real Teshuva Look & Feel Like? (AMAZING Questions In New York)

[Music] good okay we here in Brooklyn the KK we have we here few months ago and we had a nice Shure wasn't as big of a show up so I guess we got a good rep here after the first year uh but uh last time we talked a little bit about the story personal story a few other things uh tonight honestly I wanted to really leave leave it up to you guys as far as what topic you want to pick it seems like uh sometimes after the the camera goes off the questions and answers start and they're much more interested than the talk that I picked so if uh anybody has any questions whatsoever about Judaism uh whether it's philosophical questions or anything else uh we can start with that with one question five questions 10 questions whatever it is as many questions you have um and see where that goes because uh maybe it's something that all of you have has a question if I talk about something I have a lot of books in front of me but if I talk about something and none of you are interested in it it's not really going to serve any purpose I'm more interested in uh talking about what you're interested in than what I'm interested in and reason why um I'm confident that most likely I'll be able to answer the questions with with hm's help of course is because at some point in my life I was probably in your shoes uh at some point in my life I had a lot of questions um at some point in my life I had a lot of doubts at some point in my life I went through a lot of problems and as uh the Prophet Jeremiah says in the third chapter beginning of the third chapter of the book of a he says I know suffering so he starts this chapter he says I know suffering why does he say I know suffering because he witnessed the destruction of the bet mikdash so he says I know what suffering looks like I saw a river of blood of the Jewish people that were murdered I know that what it feels like to see to witness this horror I know what feels like to have doubts I know what it feels like to have questions he knows and who's who's considered wise someone that has experience if let's say for example you wanted to get advice of how to become rich you're not going to go to a homeless person obviously he doesn't know how to be rich if he knew he wouldn't be homeless on the other hand you're not going to ask a uh someone that's uh rich how to be the best husband in the world if he's never been married before just because he's Rich doesn't mean he's going to be a good husband so you have to go to somebody with B experience someone that has experience so when you have a lot of T in your life you have a lot a lot of different problems in your life you know those problems you could use them for good or for bad you could use those problems to help your life and you know Elevate you to a much better level build you up to be better or you could just complain the rest of your life that you had a tough life it's your choice either way you're going to have the suffering either way you're going to have the problems the problems won't go away go away the question is how you going to treat those problems so we had a lot of different problems whether it be money problems or relationship problems all types of problems in our life but we're able with the use of the Torah we're able to um use these problems to the advantage of of of teaching tah learning tah and building a better life if you don't mind moving out of the camera's way cuz the camera's looking at it so without further Ado why don't you guys start with some questions anybody have any questions everybody knows everything no go ahead okay so that's one what else more we'll answer more more than one more than one question at once no next question my background I'm bored of my own story but I guess other people didn't hear the story so we'll say the story too what else what other questions huh donation okay next significance of it where you should donate where you shouldn't donate what anything specific about it or anything okay cha okay anything else After Life After Life okay I'll try to throw that in there too marriage okay marriage with also shom Shalom B business cheating business okay it's possible too not the you guys have to keep count because I'm going to count on you to remind me if I forgot something if you have anything else you can throw it in the middle being at 7 o'cl you must attend we're gonna start with that and we'll start with a little bit of personal story and try to throw some of these other topics if you have a question in the middle of what I'm talking do not feel ashamed raise your hand and ask it's not a prepared speech so you're not interrupting anything if you have a question about something that I said if you don't understand what I said ask me cuz again like I said the point is for you to know I already know what I'm going to say meaning I know the information so it's not for me to talk it's for you to listen and B for it to affect you so if you don't understand something then how could it affect you and if you misunderstand something it's not going to be good I had a student one time I said the story last night and people almost had a heart attack I had a student not too long ago maybe about two years ago and uh she was going to conversion to somebody else for four years and uh when a woman goes to conversion it's a little different than a man going to conversion she has to learn a few things that are different she has to learn about something called family Purity the whole issue when she's allowed to be with a husband when she's not and so on and so forth now this woman she had to learn she learned a lot of different things about Tor about Shabbat MIT and so on but the one subject no one ever thought of years is so my wife is very well versed in this section and so I bring my I tell my students to go to her she teaches them whatever they need she sits down with them and answers questions so this woman that's been going to a rabbi for four years you would think she' know everything by now but she didn't she goes to my wife she asks her questions and my wife is excited she's this T that and the woman tells she goes aren't you a little embarrassed to go to the mik though every time my wife says no absolutely not it's holy it's beautiful it's amazing it's Freedom it's peaceful it's what could possibly be embarrassing it's not like this Shalom men looking or anything like that or anyone looking you have your own privacy so she says yeah but isn't it strange that another woman is touching you to check you she goes who's touching you what are you talking about who told you this she goes isn't somebody checking you to see if you're need down or not she goes no who told you this crazy information she goes I don't know I was scared to ask I thought that's what happens so you see the point here is that she misheard somebody say something so for four years she thought that Shalom the Jewish people are sick people she thought that the women go to mik they get touched by another person Shalom this is craziness but this is small error that became big error we had the privilege of fixing it so honestly would have left I would have left the whole conversion process if I would have thought what she thought she had the strength to not fail this uh to overcome the test so point being is that there's no such thing as a dumb question there's no such thing as anything that's negative you have a question you ask on the spot live so my background is a little interesting I uh you see Team hasem you get excited this is part of team hasm so he's part of our CU he does a lot to me that's the of the world people that go out there and volunteered to do kiru to go out there and get am to come back to Hashem so I wasn't like this my whole life most of my life I was complete opposite end I was born in Israel we moved to the United States when I was 10 years old which is 27 years ago at 10 years old I only knew a few letters of the alphabet I went to school when you're 10 years old you learned the English language pretty you know pretty quickly and uh advanced in school pretty fast became a what they call a but in the secular world I went to public school even though I came from a traditional family where they didn't exactly keep Shabbat or or other things but we kept tradition so we'd have kidou and then we go to the movies you know or we go to the beach you know but you kept K so you talk dou is good you eat kosher but inside the house outside the house sometimes sometime you know how like people believe a is only inside your house he's only inside your fridge he's not in a restaurant the restaurant you can eat whatever you want in the at home make sure you eat kosher that's I love people tell me I'm kosher at home I'm kosher I'm like WM is not outside your house it's only inside your house wow it's amaz mikash your house your house is better mikdash we should go there have is only inside your house he's nowhere else but this is what convinces us yet evil inclination convinces us hem is only in one place he's not everywhere so this is what I thought he convinced me convinced me was a very very good argument and I said listen McDonald's once in a while it's not a big problem you go to public school you want to be like the public school people what's the public school people you want to be a rapper you want to be a football player you want to be a movie star you want to be everything but a Jew everything and anything but a Jew last thing on in the world that you want to be is a Jew why it's embarrassing it's embarrassing be a Jew you don't want to be a Jew when you don't know what being a Jew is you don't know that when you're a Jew you're a king you don't want to be a Jew you think that a Jew is like some strange guy that wears black and white all the time you don't realize that's the king you're thinking that's some strange guy you think 50 Cent is cool you think DMX is cool you think that stuff's cool you think that's the that's the that's that's that's the guy that's the guy that's telling everybody how much money he's got he's got 20 in rims that's the cool I want to be that guy the fact that he just hung himself last week you don't think about that not 50 Cent another guy another uh celebrity Lincoln Park lead singer sold millions and millions of Records had six kids two wives and more money than he can count decided life is not worth living if anyone ever thought that money could solve all of your problems he helped you solve that problem it doesn't you could kill yourself even with a lot of money and as a matter of fact suicide is a rich person's problem poor people don't commit suicide only rich people commit suicide statistically statistically rich people commit suicide why because a poor person always has hope once I get rich I'm GNA be happy the rich guy already has the money and he's not happy he's like I have nothing to live for he kills himself M skin you understand so I went to school I played football in high school how does a small Jewish guy play football with giants I have no idea but somehow I managed to get my butt kicked and played I won a student athlete award not because I was a good athlete but because I was the only guy that actually went to school and got good grades and I was an honorable student and so on and so forth and I went to college for a little while but I decided that I don't want to be a doctor I don't want to be a lawyer and I don't want to be in school for 100 years I want to do one thing I want to make money and to make money you don't always need to go to school sometimes you do but not always if you want to be a doctor you want to be a lawyer you want to be an architect you want to be an accountant you want to do something that requires a degree you have to go to school other than that school's a waste of time other than that school school is a complete waste of time if you're going to go to college and spend $50,000 to get a communications degree please do your parents a favor and don't go to school go to work if you're going to go to school and get a physical education degree please save your parents $100,000 please save your parents the headache do not go to school go to work go to Yesa go do something with your life school is not for you to party even though people do it you they they party seven out of eight years they party you know it's seven out of eight years now it's not three out of four it's not four years why is it seven out of eight because College isn't meaningless college is the new high school it used to be you go to high school you screw around a little bit just to make sure you get into college during year your junior year is the most important you get good grades in the junior year you get to good college you go to college you get a job now high school is like Junior High doesn't matter what you do you're going to get to College because they're going to take you for $200,000 what do they care you go to college you waste time anyway you party you drink you smoke you do everything bad in the world it's sodam and gamorra because it doesn't matter anyway why because all that matters is grad school the other $200,000 you have to spend by the time you finish school you're a senior citizen and you owe a million dollars and then they're surprised of why there's so many losers in the world with debt that and they have no idea how they're ever going to pay it back back because the guy got a communications degree after 10 years of college and a top salary for a Communications major is maybe 30,000 but he owes a half a million he's never going to pay it back but then they're wondering why why is this country bankrupt because the system is bankrupt systems bankrupt so if you're going to get a degree go to school you need to either way you need to go to basic level of school because it teaches you how to think but in general the advanced learning is only if you're actually going to do Advanced learning so I did some Advanced learning but then I realized that it's a waste of my time because I don't want to be any one of those professions I wanted to go into business so I went to the stock market business now in the stock market business there's a obviously a bunch of different opportunities one of the opportunities that I took advantage of was an opportunity that required the skill of speaking being a salesperson I already know how to be a salesperson since I was a kid so I used my skill of being a salesperson the first few years I didn't really make much money only my bosses made a lot of money but that's just like pay your dues you can't be CEO on day one you have to you know eat the turf a little bit you have to pay your dues they make $100,000 a month you make a th so be it but eventually you have this dream that one day I'm going to be the guy that makes 100,000 and that's what happened in the year 2000 you want me to stop you guys want to finish uh so if you want if uh in the year 20 01 this boss SL partner of mine panicked after he saw September 11 and he left the business leaving me for the first time in my career an opportunity to be independent still work within a company but be independent within a company and I told the owner of the uh office which is a part of a very big company that I wanted to be independent I don't want to have another partner I don't want to have another boss I want to be an independent broker and he say listen I don't have a problem with you being an independent broker but just that you have to come up with about $5,000 a month in bills and I said for what and he said part of the rent part of the secretary part of the paper part of the coffee part of this part of that I'm like yeah but I don't use all those you goes you still have to pay for it why that's life have the money for me well good you don't have the money you have a problem I said okay I'll have the money for you because where you going to get the money I have no idea yeah if you could yeah good thank you are you going to get I said I have no idea I have no idea I have maybe $1,000 in a bank $2,000 in a bank I have no idea I'm going to come up with this money but I'll come up with the money he said okay so why should I let you do this why should I take the risk on you maybe you're not going to make the money why should I take the risk on you what's your intentions here and me being a young at the time 21y old kid I answered boldly my intention is to buy you out anyone that's a little older sounds funny younger guys think it's cute in reality it's silly the guy's in the business for 20 years what 20-y old is going to buy him out or at least that's what I thought so he says he found it amusing an ambitious 20-year-old kid is wants to uh wants to buy me out fine go ahead starting Monday you can start working start getting your own clients but make sure you have my money no problem so for the first six months every dollar that I make goes to his account I have to live off of the $1 a day that I borrow from this guy Dimitri to buy coffee and a donut because that's all I could afford and I don't want to borrow money from anybody so I borrow a dollar 50 cents for each and in order to get to work I I lived in Staten Island I had to go to work in Manhattan every day so I had to sneak on a bus every morning and every night leave the house at around 5:36 in the morning get to the office at around 6:37 work till about midnight 12:30 maybe 1 get home another hour and a half travel home get home around 2 sleep for a couple of hours and do it all over again the next day that's what we call paying your dues no one becomes a millionaire by doing nothing even if it looks like it on TV on TV they give you the illusion that you become a millionaire just by being 50 Cent just by being the Google guys just by being Steve Jobs no those guys had to pay their dues as a matter of fact if you want the best proof if any of you want to read you want to read any of the BIOS you see that any bio of a like a story of somebody's life doesn't talk about the times they were successful the life story of Steve Jobs does not talk about the times he was successful this life story of Michael Jordan does not talk about the times he was successful what it talks about for the majority of the books is their failures because that's the only valuable experience exp you have in your life your success is not experience it's just benefits that's all it is you don't really learn much From Success you learn from failure so I continued paying my dues for the first uh for the first little while but then after about six months I got a little break some of my stocks started working out some of the uh investors were referring me some people in a bad Market I made $5,000 I made $1,000 I'm sorry made $1,000 that actually was able to take home which was a ton of money for me next month I made 5,000 the next month I made another 5,000 next month I made about 10,000 and the next month I made 117,000 in one month you make 17,000 I just hit 22 years old it's a lot of money I broke an office record everyone started celebrating as if it was the new star and life was good for a moment and then I picked up the phone pH and got back to work the guy told me what are you doing it's Friday why are you on the phone you just made a lot of money you made more money than the rest of the office did combined I said yeah but I have to prepare for Monday said yeah but why don't you go party and I asked him for what said to go celebrate the money you made said I did he goes when said five minutes ago it's over now we have to go do it again for me it wasn't about making money as far as to buy elaborate things for me it was the challenge I just wanted to win this is one of the decisions that everybody has to decide in their life do you want to be a winner or a loser it's your decision your decision whether you're a winner or a loser is your decision you cannot blame anybody else for you being a loser not your ABA not your IMA not your uncle not the guy that beat you up not your childhood not your future not your color not your nothing whether you're a winner or a loser is your decision obstacles will come in your way if you're a man of color you have certain obstacles if you're a Jew you have certain obstacles if you're a male you have certain obstacles female certain obstacles everyone has obstacles but those obstacles are supposed to build you not make you a loser you make you a loser or winner so if I can go for making nothing and living off of a dollar a day then I believe that anybody could do the same thing and I've seen it as a matter of fact anyone that doesn't want to leave the story one of my former employees is sitting in the room with you you could ask him at the end his name is Shan he's laughing so anyway long story short you make 117,000 a month people think you're a big deal next month you make another 50 next month you make another 100 next month you make another 180 and money starts pouring in we're making money start hiring people I leave the company start my own company by the Year 2006 where at a point where pretty much printing money A bad month is two $300,000 a good month is a lot more the best month during that year was May of 2006 we made $1.6 million in one day that was the kind of money that we were getting beautiful part about is despite how many employees I had 90% of the money was I was making it they was just filling up room it looked like it was a big company because there was a lot of employees but most of them were just grinding water trying to make it trying to be the next milli a few of them made money few of them made decent money a couple of guys made some big money but for the most part 90% of the production was me I had obviously more years in the business and more customers and so on but anyway life was good monetarily inside it was Doom inside it was empty inside I lived that joke I told you earlier about the rich guy and the poor guy and the rich guy want to kill himself because even though I wasn't necessarily suicidal I was I was very very depressed and the reason why is because you always think that once you get money life is going to change something wonderful is going to happen like all of a sudden you're not going to have problems all of a sudden things are going to work out many people come to me and they tell me listen I want to donate so much money if Hashem gives me this money I'm going to donate a lot of money so they wait to be rich to donate money did you ever think about maybe Hashem doesn't want you to donate a lot of money he just wants you to donate what you have now everybody has 50 bucks to donate everybody has 20 bucks to donate everybody has a 100 bucks to donate especially if you live in New York and you're single you live pay two $3,000 a month in rent you have 50 bucks you have 20 bucks you have a 100 bucks maybe that's what you should donate don't worry about donating 10,000 don't worry about being the big dog that buys buys for a million dollar that's not for you your test is donate the $5 that you have that's hard for you five bucks can you donate five that's worth a million dollars to AEM the $5 worth a million dollars to AEM so for anyone that's waiting to be rich before they donate it's a phenomenal phenomenal excuse that convinced you that you have to be rich to donate you don't have to be rich to donate if you have a dollar it's a dollar more than you need donate a dollar more than you need donate 100 whatever it is everybody could donate I was sitting in a car yesterday with a wonderful human being and he was telling me you know I used to donate so much money I used to do this I used to do that I tell you Rabbi this that he's tell me these you know Wonderful stories of how in the past he was able to do all these great things and now he can't because times are rough and I asked myself this question does he realize what he's saying right now okay he used to donate thousands and thousands and thousands of dollars fine you're not homeless you're still driving $100,000 car it means you could donate 50 bucks I mean if you're driving a $100,000 car you should be able to donate 50 75 maybe even a 100 I remember as a paper boy when I was 15 I donated $100 a couple of times I was making 250 bucks a week so if you're driving a $100,000 car you can donate 100 why don't you donate 100 no people have this warp mentality that you need to be a millionaire to donate so to answer your question in regards to donate for a subject that we hate on hand donate there's no price donate a dollar donate a 100 donate a million irrelevant donations in hashem's eyes he knows what you have and he's going to judge you based on what you have if you have a million you donate a hundred it's not considered a Mitzvah in your level it's not why you have a million you donated 100 it's not good if you you have 100 but you donate 10 you're you are judged based on what you have the tools you have you can't be judged for not doing a good job if you don't have a job you understand so that's in regards to donations this is one thing that's very very important for us to know as far as what to donate to there are two major MIT in Judaism that a person must donate to must try to do everything he can because it has the most amount of reward number one is the both that they both have in common they have to have Torah in mind if you're going to donate you want to make it an investment you don't want to just donate and hope that Philip the big whale is going to be saved or birth of the elephant from the Noah hide zoo is going to be saved that's not going to get you any geden the elephant being saved is not giving anyone geden what's going to be saved if you saved the human you save a human you get Gaden you save an elephant nothing so we have to save our brothers and sisters that are off the de don't know anything they think they're go they want to beim they're still where we used to be that's the guy you want to save either him or the guy that's studying the guy that's studying tomorrow all day that's the guy you want to save why he's the only reason the world exists and we'll get to that in a moment so those are the two top things you want to donate to you could ask any major of these are the two two things there are obviously other things to donate to whether it's homeless people poor people widows orphans and so on but if you're talking about levels the ask what's the top those are the two top things now money for me was always a tool the same way you look at a hammer I look at money whether I had money or I didn't have money I always looked at it as a tool didn't give me the test of valuing money as anything other than a tool so when I had a bunch of money I just thought that maybe this tool is going to help some of these problems go away little I know that all it does is that it gets me to arrive at the problems that I already had and some new ones in a limo the problems don't go away sometimes you have more problems More Money More Problems I think biggy small said that he wasn't part of kazal though so I have these new problems I have these new so-called friends and I'm doing my best to be the best that I can people come to me for help I ask them how much the help cost they tell me a price I write a check I hope that's going to make me feel better it does for a moment but then I go back to my life I'm still looking what's the purpose what's the point where is it going okay so this year I made five million next year I'm going to make 10 million so what what do you do with all of it how many cars can you buy how many houses can you buy how many vacations can you go on what's the point most most people that want to be rich never ask those questions you just want to be rich and then they say I'll figure it out later I got there I asked the questions still no answers still no answers okay so you go on vacation you go on another vacation you go on another vac eventually you want to go you want to go home you know what the best part of a vacation is going home ask anyone that went on a long vacation best part going home why home it's my home it's my bed it's my TV it's my bathroom it's my whatever home best part of a vacation you have a car how many cars can you drive at once if you're the best driver in the world one car how many cars does a really rich person Drive zero he doesn't drive he has a driver so even though if he has a Bugatti for a million or2 million dollars he still doesn't drive it somebody else drives him so the car is useless the house is useless because you only live in one house the vacation becomes useless because you're already bored of the same thing okay so you saw Sun you saw Sky you saw the trees you it all looks like your backyard already so what what do you do then what I worked so hard to make this money now what I got there and I didn't know not what okay I had a wife she was wonderful now what so you have kids the kids drive you crazy now what do what go work eat drink get uh get some money go to the bathroom a few times a day eat drink go on vac every day it's the same thing now what what's the point What's the difference between me and the cow the cow doesn't have a mortgage Bill actually I should be a cow if that's what life's about should be a lion Everybody's scared of you you don't have a mortgage Bill you're never stressed out Roar at everybody and they run away you ever see a balding uh a balding monkey no he's not stressed out he has a wife he has kids he has a house you may not want to live in his house he has a house too toam it's a mansion it's the whole jungle what's the difference what's the point I asked myself this question I didn't have an answer and when I didn't have an answer I got depressed so what do you do when you get depressed you have Rich you go away you run away you run away from your problems so I went I went to Las Vegas I went to Las Vegas for a little over a month I started play I played I was a high stakes poker player I liked math I liked psychology the two good are good for poker plus I had money so it was very difficult to beat me because I wasn't scared of losing and I played high stakes poker it was a pretty decent player play with the best players in the world that some people watch on TV I beat many of them lost to some of them that was my fun went from stress to stress after a month month and a half however long I was there came home I'm back to now what I'm back to okay I'm making money okay the employees okay everybody think I'm great oh so then what still don't know so what do I do I said you know what let me make my body better so I said listen you know what this's one thing that's annoying me once or twice a year it's called hemorrhoids two out of three people in America have it it's a very common problem it's annoying it's not really such a big deal so I go to the doctor I'm like what's the what's the cost of fixing this annoying problem that bothers me once or twice a year and he says listen it's only a few thousand and I say okay how much time he goes no you come I do the surgery I do two three surgeries a day for the last 20 years you come to me I give you a surgery on a Wednesday morning you relax you rest for a few days you're back to work on Monday I said okay no problem even though I'm making $3,000 an hour this so two three days is a lot of money I said I already have plenty no big deal let me take the surgery or at least I thought I wake up out of the surgery screaming and yelling in pain asking my wife and my mom to kill me because the pain is no longer hemorrhoids pain the pain has now evolved to some type of mutation it evolved to some type of alien it evolved to something out of this world the pain felt like someone took one of these daggers from the Commando movies connected it to an electric outlet and just started cutting me up in my entire body over and over again it won't stop that's the pain I had and it won't stop eventually they gave me the most amount of morphine legally allowed and I calmed down they said we have no idea what just happened but you seem okay so sorry we have no idea what happened but you can go home now after all was only elective surgery it was an optional surgery it's not like a cancer or heart attack or anything like that it's an optional surgery go home good luck thank you for coming I was excited to go home to run away from these people that caused me so much pain I went home we picked up sh on the way home ate the sandwich the very famous sandwich that I've mentioned in every one of my lectures it was a good sandwich after all and I thought that it's over little did I know it's just beginning I went to sleep I woke up 45 minutes later with more pain than I did the first time only this time there was no doctors there was no help and there was no hope for 62 days this time it didn't stop after a couple of hours this time it didn't stop for 62 days this time it just got worse this time it led to the rest of my body starting to fail started urinating blood blood coming out of my eyes infections in my ears and so many words going back and forth to the doctors where the doctors were saying we have no idea what happened we have no idea what's wrong with him we have no idea how it could all be but he's probably dying for simple surgery so this wasn't exactly part of the plan this is when having the answer of what's the point in Life Starts mattering because if you're going to die you need to know what's going to happen after in Judaism you have life here which kazal the SES called the world of lies and the reason why is because most of what we think is true is a lie meaning the rambam explains that everything that we desire naturally is for us we desire money too much of it will kill us we desire women too much of them will kill us we desire intimacy sex too much of it will kill us we desire food too much of it will kill us everything we desire we want too much of we have no stop button and if Hashem didn't put something in our way we would die huh too much tah cannot kill you too much Torah that's the one thing that you can't die from but the problem is that you don't have a desire for it naturally naturally you don't have a desire for it and the reason why is because you're not brought into the world knowing what Torah is most people think Torah is a bunch of stories about a bunch of old men that wear a hat maybe a strl maybe a beard maybe this maybe that good stories in a desert most people think it's just stories most people think it's a history book if it was a history book the Torah is an instruction set it's an instruction set of how to live what to do how to be successful in life and marriage and business and everything and anything that you want to do it's an instruction set for all of it people spend tens of thousands of dollars trying to figure out how to be better how to be better quality version of themselves they call self-help called self-help the beauty of the Torah is that anything that's any good in this world must have a source in the Torah if it's good it has to have a source in the Torah has to if it's not in the Torah it's definitely not good so even I'll give you an example the uh one of the lines I actually mentioned earlier what uh Biggy Smalls the uh late rapper said More Money More Problems also in kazal it's actually M kazal says more money you're going to have more problems it's not his invention but I'll give you something even more interesting that I found as a that I thought was very interesting does anybody here have kids one two you're all young so you haven't been beat up by your little kid yet we'll talk about that soon we'll talk about that soon but if you have little kids you know that your kids for whatever reason or another little kids like music little kids like music they love music and there's a song in the English language called if you're happy and you know it if you're happy you know I clap your hands Don't Clap it's a song it's a famous song and people think that it was invented by some guy about 100 200 years ago nonsense it's in the Torah it's in the Torah what is it in the Torah the prophet Ezekiel in chapter 6 verse 11 it tells us about the process of what would happen as part of mourning when someone died what would happen when someone died they would carry him all the way to the funeral all the way to where they would bury him but at that moment there was a thing that would do a ritual that would do and he says here thus said Hashem the Lord Hashem Elohim he says clap your hands stomp your feet and say alas says clap your hands stomp your feet and say o so the go changed it clap your hands stomp your feet and say yay so instead of us this was a form of mourning like saying O like saying like moaning like this is just a ritual a thing that we did few thousand years ago so the go changed it they said instead of clapping you know instead of mourning a funeral let's make it something happy they're happy because it's Jews dying over here but anyway point being is they change it what is they clap your hands stomp your feet say hooray so good song everything and anything that's any good in life must have a source of finding out these things finding out all these is fascinating to me because you see that it's how true it is you see why someone that's called the wisest man of alll was addicted to Tor addicted to tah all he did wanted to learn T it's all he wanted to do learn T you're the smartest guy in the world you already know everything I know nothing I need to know Torah it's the smartest the richest has everything everything you can all you want to do is learn you understand why when you find these things see anything that's any good has to have Source in the so anyway I woke up out of this surgery I'm in bad shape I go to sleep I wake up and wor shape and now it's worse shaped than I even thought because aside from dying or at least that's what they thought I don't have an interesting answer of what happens after I heard about this concept of G and G but I had no idea what happens there so briefly to answer the question that somebody else asked as far as Life After Life in Judaism we believe that this world is a world full of lies meaning that everything that we want is really not so good for us everything that we don't want that says is poison is really good for us yet says poison it really it's a poison for him but good for us vitamins for us the people that are successful materially are usually the biggest the people that are poor sometimes biggest it's a lie it's a world that's upside down but Kaz says this life is only a proo this life is only a corridor it's like a hallway short hallway that lead you to the real life every house has a small little hallway some big some small but in general the hallway is a small part of the house no one would say listen the hallway is my house no it's just a part small part of my house same thing with life this life here that we think is real we think is everything is really nothing this life is just a corridor it's just the place you do your job it's the place you put your job application is the pay the place you pay your dues to get to the real life what's the real life the real life is eternal it's forever what does Forever look like B it all depends on what you do in this corridor if you do good in this hallway you do what the instructions say eternity peaches amazing everything and anything you can imagine times it by a million it's still not enough the greatest of everything is not enough to describe one moment OFA for a righteous person if you combine all of the good of all of the people Rich poor Kings servants whoever you combine all of the good they ever had in their entire life from the beginning of mankind until the end it's not enough to justify one moment Ina that's that part on the other hand if it's not so good it's the exact opposite all of the bad that anyone can imagine it's much much worse there's a book in the torat one of the 24 books in the torat about a prophet named job job was actually not Jewish he was a noahide he was a righteous Gentile and job was a prophet that was able to talk to Hashem and in his book it talks about his big test where he went from being a billionaire to being homeless he went from having 10 kids to all of his kids dying on one day he went from being popular and amazing to everyone making fun of him all in one day lost everything and he had to suffer extraordinary pain both emotionally and physically to such an extent that the worms were coming out of his body not just going in and kazal says that all of the pain that he had it's worth it to have that pain for 70 years meaning for a full life on this Earth that to spend one minute in the back place to spend one minute in G this is hard for us to understand understand how bad it could really be so ideally is not going there now at this point when I had the surgery I didn't know the details of either one of the places all I knew is that there's something called Gom there's something called ganeden but apparently if you give someaka you should be going to ganeden at least that's what I thought so I went to this phase of two months of quickly dying at some point after two months Hashem had mercy on me and he started easing the pain I started coming back to myself I thought that okay I saw what Gom looks like in this world at least now I'm going to go back to work go back to making money go back to building my company go back to figuring out I have another chance at life nine months later I get a pain in my leg I go to the doctor the next day because I can't handle the pain anymore it's even worse than what the things were before they tell me that I have an infection in between two muscles called an abscess an internal abscess that is so big and so dangerous that if I would have waited a few hours it would have exploded got into my blood system and I would have died instantly so I have to have an emergency surgery and the recovery is even more difficult than the surgery because they have to reopen the surgery every day several times a day lots of fun so anyway so for the next 10 days I'm an intensive care unit with constant morphine in my system this second surgery was worse than the first eventually the hospital stays over I think okay fine this is over stage two is done I'm finished gone Halas enough six months later another infection another surgery another recovery 3 months later another surgery another recovery and then it gets to a point where it's every month and then it gets to a point where every single day of my life I'm living in 24 hours a day of pain but now it's not one part of my body like I told you as soon as a surgery happened my body changed now I have something called being hyp sensitive meaning that I feel pain much more than you do now when I was a football player I barely felt pain because you have to have high pain pay pain tolerance in order to play football you can't cry if you somebody hit you now if you're hypers sensitive you can't play football why because if you do this to them they feel it much more so I became hypers sensitive so aside from having pain already the pain itself was felt worse to me than what it even was and it already was bad but now the pain wasn't in one place it was from everywhere from my neck all the way to the bottom of my feet everything I had to be on constant painkillers but even that wasn't helpful I still had to tolerate Pain still had to deal with it once in a while something new would happened one day my leg started hurting the next day they became puffy the next day they doubled in size when your legs double in size unnaturally it's not fun you go to the doctor you hope that this guy that went to school for a million years is going to have a solution he owes $250,000 to somebody he should have some type of solution unfortunately he knew less than I did what did he tell me he told maybe it's from the heat maybe your legs doubled in size in 24 hours from the heat I said you should go back to school or at least ask for a refund Heat this is the stupidity that you deal with in the medical world people think that doctors are geniuses what Hospital Cornell Cornell top university top Hospital top idiots too went to every hospital and everywhere over the next few years I realized this problem was not going away over the next few years I realized this problem is permanent or at least I thought so the pain that I had that I thought was only going to last for a day and then for a month and then for two months and then for nine months continued for the next seven years seven years of 24 hours a day pain non-stop no breaks no Shabbat no vacation once in a while the pain became tolerable where I would be able to manage life but it was always pain just degrees of pain some pain I was still able to have a conversation some pain I wasn't able to stand and it got worse over time So eventually you have that much pain you're not able to run your business you're not able to run your life you start losing the purpose of life if there was a purpose you don't want it anymore one of the most horrific things that a person can feel is that their suffering is for no reason everyone suffers everyone has a different level of suffering but everyone suffers in their life something or another some people F suffer from Health some people suffer from money issues some people suffer from their kids some people suffer from sicknesses and so on and so forth people suffer that's life will have suffering unfortunately it's part of life very much a big part of life actually it's a bigger part of life enjy in many cases but the worst part about being secular the worst part about not having 100% in is that when you don't have inem you think that your suffering is for no reason you're just suffering you're like you know hashem's picking on you he doesn't like you he forgot about you he went to sleep and you're still in pain like there's no reason for it like when people ask where was God during the Holocaust where was God last weekend when this Arab terrorist decided to murder three Jews where was God during the pilgrims where was God during all of these sicknesses where was God when kids are being abused insulted where was God the answer is very simple when you learn toah he did it he pressed the Go Button nothing in the world happens without Hashem saying this has to happen if a leaf every tree has tens of thousands of leaves some more some less but a leaf at some point falls off the tree if the leaf wants to fall off the tree has to ask God for permission can I fall no next day can I fall no next day can I fall okay today you can fall now you can fall that's God if you believe in something else that's not God it's something else real God the god of Israel the god of the Torah he controls everything anything and everything in between things you know things you don't know and he even knows what's in your mind as a matter of fact one of the 13 principles of Faith to know whether you believe in Judaism or not is if you believe whether he knows what's inside your mind if you don't you're saf Jew it may be not a Jew perit if you're going to go to a conversion we have the honor of helping a lot of converts go to conversion they're going to ask you do you believe in the 13 principles of Faith you're GNA say yes of course I believe in anything he said just give me the test give me the certificate give me something okay tell us what's the what's the 13 um principles of Faith explain them to us they can ask you oh do you know what uh that God knows what's in your mind no no I don't believe in that he knows everything else not what's in my mind he knows what's in his mind I'm complicated I'm difficult I'm smart I'm this I'm that I'm something you never heard of everybody always tells me I have a story you never heard of everybody thinks they're unique you are unique but more to God he's your father but he still knows what's in your mind it's not so unique to him why he created you he put it in you so when you suffer without God it's miserable it's hopeless you want to die because you see that there's no point to this it's beating me up beating me up beating me up and nothing but bad's going to happen out of it other than me being in pain there's nothing good out of it once you start learning tah you get to a stage where you start learning about about fear of hem after you learn about some you start learning about and I don't mean like somea Channel tells you listen if you believe God is good then that'sa that's Nota that's just somebody saying it'sa means that Hashem runs the worlda means that hem runs the world and he has you in mind means that Hashem wants good for you even though you see it as bad Anda means that when it's dark you still believe in God when it's horrible you have no question in your mind that God's pressing the buttons when there's murder there's pgms there's Holocaust you know who did it and you know he did it for a good reason even though it's hard for us to Fathom it's hard for us to understand what could possibly be so good about six million people dying said he said everything that the merciful one does everything that hashm does has to be the best not just good the best what does it mean the best you have an infinite amount of ways to go from point A to point B tomorrow morning or tomorrow afternoon I go back to Florida to home wife two little kids there's multiple ways of going home I'm taking Jet Blue Jet Blue is going to take me home but in reality there's more than one way to go home you could take Spirit if you want to torture yourself you could take United Airlines if you want them to rip you off you could drive if you want to waste a lot of time you could go on a boat if you're a multi-millionaire with nothing to do with your time there's many many different options of how to get home gives us a he said Hashem has even more ways to break you from point A to point B infinite amount of ways the way that he picks is always the best way even if it hurts even if it's difficult even if you don't understand even if you do think you understand the way he picked always the best it's always the best option meaning that the most difficult things for us to understand are still the best option to be a Jew you have to believe this that's emuna it's not some emuna channel it's not some guy that tells you things that are against the Torah but he has a payers and you think he's a tadik that's notun payers don't make you have Bel what makes you believe is your actions you going to a tough time yes you still believe in God yes that's auna you don't believe in God you never had auna in the first place AA is not something you lose you could only gain it once you have it it's permanent it's like a body part you can't just lose it it's not something you lose in the street no I used to have AEM but I went to a tough time I don't believe in it no more no that means you never had it get something else maybe it was gas it wasn'ta it wasn't amuna it was something else you had a burp maybe it wasn't amuna amuna is not something you lose you don't lose it you have it it's permanent becomes part of you it's a DNA becomes part of you if it's little here a little there it's not amuna it's something else it's like maybe it's like on the way to having amuna it's not amuna so anyone wants to teach you am tell them what's amuna if they give you a different definition it's not amuna something else amuna is something that once you have it becomes part of you so I didn't have this I didn't have anything close to it so to me without life was terrible why because to me I was suffering for no reason so I wanted to die especially after seven years Hashem promises us that he's not going to give us a test that we can't pass I got to that point where I was starting to fail meaning I started looking for an exit strategy so hasem sent me the answer when abah ainu was three years old he got out of the cave he had to hide in a cave his father put him in a cave because the evil Idol worshiping King at the time wanted to kill him so he hid the little baby in a cave after he came out of the Cave the mid says he's three years old he's looking at the sky and he sees a sun wow that's God that's God but then the sun went down the moon came up a moon must be stronger CH stuck down the sun like nobody's business knocked him out that's God but then he saw it changed again now he's confused he's looking for God he's looking for God he thinks maybe the tree maybe this maybe this maybe this maybe this but he keeps looking for God because he says there must be a god this beautiful P thing didn't just appear like some idiot say in the world today that everything came from nothing even if you want to believe everything came from nothing where did the first nothing come from the first cell let's say we all came from a cell there was a cell went through mitosis so meosis which splits the cell and then it splits it again so two becomes four four becomes eight and so on and so forth and eventually becomes a fish and the fish somehow grows legs and the legs ends up become somehow a lizard and somehow he becomes a monkey and the monkey sitting in front of you give get a lecture for next two hours fine let's say you want to believe it let's say you want to believe all of that fine where are the first cell come from must be a Creator must be something even if you don't believe Judaism you still must believe in God you still must believe in an infinite God which means you're a fool why if you already believe in the creator that created the first cell why are you limiting this Creator to only one cell why can't can he create two cells and if he create two cells why can't he create four and if he create four why can't he just create the chicken and not the egg and if he created already chicken why can't he create the farm and the house and the and and the sky and the heavens and everything why are you limiting your creator what kind of Creator you have what does he need a job he needs money kind of Creator is this if you already believe in a Creator because you're logical rational person you must believe in the god of Israel anything otherwise is pure craziness so so now I believed in God the Judaism part was a little bit difficult for me I thought Judaism was optional I thought I could keep and I makes me sadik I don't keep I'm still okay so now when I'm suffering and I don't have any I want to end this deal because I figured I'm okay anyway this life after life is going to be okay I'm going to G it anyway I gave some I donated some money I should be okay Hashem obviously had a different plan for me he said no no no you stay right there I decide when you live and die but he also knew that I couldn't tolerate anymore so one day my mom who had a sense like a typical mom had a sense that something was fishy something was wrong she started calling different rabbis asking for B she called Israel she called America she called anyone and everyone she had in this little black book but today unlike other days no one's picking up the phone two hours she's ding the phone no one's picking up the phone eventually after two hours a woman in Israel picks up the phone my mom asks for a certain rabbi's name that Rabbi is not available and not why not because he's not there but because the woman says you've dialed the wrong phone number you dial the wrong phone number in the wrong country my w my my mom is hysterical crying because she's just dialing the for two hours to ask for a simple finally she gets a human being and what's the human being is the wrong person she starts crying but did exactly what he did for afteru was looking looking looking looking looking looking what hasm do he peeed in he says oh you're looking for me I'm God I'm God I'm the one that's running I'm the one put the moon I'm the one that put the sun I'm the I'm the one that's mid say the Bal the king the one that's the balab the one that's the owner picked in and he said hey it's me you're looking for it's me same thing happened my mom's story my mom is looking for God he's looking for blessings and hasm makes it so the woman hears my mom crying the strange woman the wrong phone number in a different country and she says do which is my mom's name my mom is in shock and she says who are you how do you know my name she says I'm your niece your brother's sister but how did I get to you she say how did I how did I get to you I called the wrong phone number and I don't even have your phone number for it to be some type of mistake we've never talked on the phone before we don't have each other's phone numbers you've dialed the wrong phone number in a wrong country in a country that has 15 or so million people and you reached one person and that one person identified your voice even though you've never talked on the phone before and on top of that that one person is the only one that can help you why because Pina which is her name says to my mom why are you crying my mom says because my kid is dying everyone knows yon is sick he's dying and I need a blessing from a big Rabbi he says if you're looking for a big Rabbi why don't you call my brother R frim he's a big he's very accomplished in the Tora himself but on top of that he lives only a building or so away from he connect you if necessary so my mom calls Rim he's in a call it he calls her back they talk and R is very very wise far beyond his years and right away he asked my my mom a very serious question does he speak Hebrew because R and I have never spoken before I actually didn't even know he existed when I left Israel and I was 10 he was still a baby so she says yeah he speaks Hebrew says all so I can just call him myself and talk to him and see if I can help him he said no he would never talk to you and at that very moment when she said he would never talk to you I decided out of the blue to call my mother for the first time in maybe a year that's when God peaks in again twice in the same day and he says I'm the one running the show my mom answers the phone hysterical crying and she says talk to him talk to him and I asked her who talk to who and why are you crying says talk to a FR and I said who's a f and why is he making you cry says your cousin talk to him he could help you I said if it's going to stop you from crying you could have him call me just stop crying the worst thing in the world you could hear is your mom crying so I waited for this phone call the phone call comes in this guy named EP FR calls me hi hi he says you like stories said yeah sure I like stories would you ever hear the story of Judah and Tamar said I don't even know who they are so he tells me the story of Judah and Tamar and all the different secrets in the story of how it leads to the mashiah still to this day one of my favorite stories if not my favorite story of all time it took me four years to realize why he chose that story which is something I'll tell in another lecture story of Judah and tamay is a biblical story of how Judah had two sons Er it's he was Judah as one of the 12 tribes of the sons of yob a and he had two sons he tried marrying one of them to this woman named Tamal but he was wicked he didn't want to have kids he wanted to keep his wife pretty he didn't want to get her pregnant so what he did is he wasted seed instead of being with his wife in order to make kids he ended up being with his wife but the ejaculation happened outside of the body in hashem's eyes even before he gave the Tora that was considered a huge sin that was considered such a huge sin to the point that the Tor calls it 100% murder why murder because each one of these seeds has a life in it now page 16 talks about what is in every one of these seeds every time there's a seed there's a Mal there's an angel called lah who takes the seed comes to hem and says what will be with this seed what will be with the seed is it going to be tall is going to be short it's going to be rich it's going to be poor what's going to be his name and so on and so forth and Hashem decides whether the seed's going to come to life or not and Hashem decides how this life is going to be whether it's going to be a tall person short person rich person poor person and so on and so forth meaning it doesn't pay to work over time cu already decided only thing that's in your decision is whether you follow hasem or not whether you have or not whether you're rich poor Rich um tall short white black all that stuff it's not your choice only thing it's your choice whether you have or not whether you connect to hem and you follow what he says that's your choice so in sham they say each one of these seed is supposed to be a potential light when you waste it that means you're committing murder according to recent signs they said that every time a male ejaculates it's approximately 300 million seeds meaning a person that Wast seed on purpose which is a very very common problem in today's world Jewish world and otherwise is committing murder of potentially 300 million people almost the size of America by the end of a week an average high high school student has destroyed half the world this is a reality now how does this affect you number one it's one of the three biggest sins in Judaism we're not going to go into the details of what happens in a bad place called G but you should know there's a cost for everything the three biggest sins in Judaism meaning you decide to smoke a cigarette on Shabbat drive on Shabbat ride on Shabbat all of those things is considered Shabbat that is considered one of the top three sins in Judaism Shabbat second one is desecrating aem's name you go you open up a website against the Torah you go you open up a website a website against some Rabbi that's not doesn't deserve this type of Shame you go against theem you bring shame to the Torah you bring shame to Hashem that's the second biggest third one is wasting seed on purpose the reason why I say it's the three worst sins is because the punishment for them is the worst now the hot place they call Gom has seven levels and one of them the worst level only three types of Sinners enter it and those are the three so for anyone that does it it's obviously something you have to do Chu for you'll succeed there is a way to do chuva for it yeah question is one that is a big sin but it's not a uh it's not one of the top three it's not one of the top three it is it is a huge syn also applies to go and we learn it actually from the story of because Eran were GRE there were no hides ER were GRE there were no hides and hem said that a wasted seed he killed him he on the spot right he died he killed him then there's a mitvah in Judaism in the Tora is called I so when a uh a brother dies a married brother dies and he has a wife with no kids there's a mitvah for his brother the living brother to marry the wife because there's no kids yet we don't fulfill this Mitzvah anymore but in those days they did so Judah said to his other son marry your brother's sister and bring a kid to the World In His Name a mitvah he married her but he was also the same type of rash he also didn't want to ruin her beauty he also didn't want to get her pregnant he also wasted seed so what did hasem do he killed him too so from here we learn this is is actually one of the foundational sources of where we learned that how wasting seed is not only something that Hashem hates but he hates for all of mankind not just for Jews The Story Goes as uh Tamar had prophecy and she got in the prophecy a secret that the mssiah is going to come from the seed of Judah from the father of these two sons that just died but Judah also had another son and he said she told him can I marry the third son he said yeah you just have to wait he's too young but Judah never had an intention to have her marry the son she realized this and she wanted to have the Mitzvah of being part of the M Messianic lineage so she decided to take upon herself a big mission what was the mission she pretended to be a prostitute now in those days prostit stitutes were very different than today prostitutes today look like regular people they all have no clothes on this is reality in the old days prostitutes look different than regular people they used to have prostitute had no clothes on real people had clothes on today they all look the same prostitute sometimes has more clothes on than the regular people just reality I mean listen anyone that asked their grandparents ABA did you and uh Sab you and Safta wear the clothes that people wear today like yes we used to wear them but back then we called what they wear underwear people walk around today with underwear just they don't have anything on top of it same thing permit this is reality sad but it's reality and the days of 4,000 years ago is even more of a difference the difference between a prostitute and a regular righteous woman or even a regular woman was that a prostitute covered her face that's how you knew she was a prostitute so all of these Muslims that cover their face thinking that sikim in reality they look like prostitutes from the Torah this is this is Hashem laughing at them this is laughing at them people making no rules hasm laughs in their face can't add to my Torah so anyway she pretended to be a prostitute so she convinced Judah to sleep with with her Hashem wanted this to happen so he actually pushed judah's evil inclination judah's yet to make him do something he wouldn't normally do and he ended up actually sleeping with her now The Story Goes she said listen I need to get paid and he said listen I don't have any money on me but I'm a very rich and powerful person I'll give you the money you you have my word she goes listen I don't trust your word I need some down payment he's like fine what do you want she goes I want three things I want want the shaft the stick that you hold on so it's know it's a very reputable thing the ring which was used used for a signature in those days you use a ring for Signature and your underwear those three things everyone knows it's yours so if I come if you don't want to pay me I'm going to come to your castle and say hey who does this belong to and say it's yours ah no one's GNA say it's my stick no one's GNA say it's my signature no one's it's my underwear these all things are distinctively yours so if you're going to try to beat me on the payment declare bankruptcy chapter 11 I'm coming after you no problem Judah had no plans of not paying her obviously he wanted to pay her he just had to get back home get the money come back so he sent it was embarrassing for him to pay so he sent his friend his friend came looked for the prostitute couldn't find her he asked people do you see a prostitute goes we don't have prostitutes here all of a sudden The Prostitute vanished at the face of the Earth and Judah said to his friend listen listen don't ask people if there's a prostitute because start knowing I I went with a prostitute let's leave this bush this thing that I did let's leave this embarrassment in the background let it go away let her keep whatever she got let her go away but as hem would have it he made the seed that came out of Judah bring twins inside Tamar's stomach and a few months later the people started noticing and they went to Judah and they said listen your daughter-in-law is pregnant but she's not married this is a Biz this is disrespect for the kinghood this is disrespect for your family how she's going with somebody without being married he says you're right punishment burning throw her in the fire go arrest her throw her in the fire with the pregnant with everything CU he doesn't know it's him they throw her in jail and said listen you have any last request before we throw you in fire yeah I only have one request she say what's your request I just want to see Judah I want to see yudah talk to him for two seconds it's last request you know some people ask for ice cream some people ask for steak I just want to talk to the guy for one second okay no you're going to die in a few minutes we'll give you they bring Judah and she says to him who do these belong to she shows him the stick she shows them the signat she shows them the underwear she doesn't say hey this is yours you you it's your your DNA she didn't say that meaning she showed it to him and she get left the option to him she didn't say hey you owe me welfare you owe me this fair you owe me that fair you owe me child's fair you no nothing said who does this belong to who does this belong to is it yours or somebody else who do it belong to meaning she was telling him and she's teaching us that it's better it's better to go jump into a fire and burn to death than to embarrass somebody body in public cuz if she would have said hey Judah you did this you're the one that got me pregnant this is yours you would have got embarrassed she said it's better to jump into a fire and die innocent death She's innocent it's better to die in this fire than to embarrass him or anyone that's where we learn that from that's why David says someone who embarrasses another person in public has no share of the world to come deash worked their entire life to do ch for even one embarrassment to get thata back it's very serious stuff can't just embarrass people think it's funny all of us did it at some point meaning that this is another one of the many reasons we need to do ju so now all the way from Florida so that's the story of Judah and Tamar in so many words and the reason why hasem made this strange act lead to the is because the mhia knows that once the um yet knows that once the mashia comes it's game over for him too Hashem Slaughters him so he's been trying to get in the way of the Messiah lineage this whole time so hasem said listen let's make this strange thing happen where the yet is going to look at it he say there's no way anything good is coming out of Judah being with a prostitute so I'm going to leave it alone I'm not going to bother I'm not going to get in the way he goes away he goes on vacation to Cancun meanwhile mashia came to the world so that was a story and there a obviously a lot more details to the story but I'm giving you a a brief overview of it I like the story we continue talking I I start asking him questions this ra FR and he gives me answers but the type of answers that he gives me are very different than the answers that I'm used to reason why is because I'm used to people giving me their opinions I ask you what do you think of the market you tell me your opinion you don't have no valid proof that what you think is going to happen I ask you what you think of this new invention you give me your opinion ask you what you think of the future you give me your opinion most people talk about their opinion there very little fact here it was different here there was no opinion I asked the question said oh what a great great question you know that Rabbi so and so asked the same question 850 years ago in this book on this page in this line and this is what it says and he knows it by heart and I thought in the beginning I thought maybe he just happened to have this one book in front of him and he knows the page number so I asked another question he said wow what a great question so I already feel good about myself I'm asking two good questions in a row and he says it's this Rabbi on this page in this book in this line he knows it by heart also and I'm like you happens to have two books what's the chances of happening both books the same page and he knows it so ask a third question and he knows the page he knows the RAB he knows the number and I asked do you have all these books go no I don't have these books so I didn't it took me a while to understand what just happened here so I just started asking questions for next hour and 40 minutes we're talking I'm asking questions he gives me answers and after the call I feel this is the greatest thing in the world when you've been looking for answers your entire life and finally you got some answers with sources and it's not opinion it's fact it's proof it's there's a source for it it's the highest high you can possibly imagine if you've ever had questions and they haven't been answered you go into a session and you start getting answers one after another no greater pleasure in the world exists I run to my wife and I tell her he knows it and she goes who is he and what does he know I said brother FR knows the secret to the world she goes that's the stuff you've been looking for all these years goes yeah he knows it he goes keep talking to him so I keep talking to him only I don't know his phone number so I wait for his phone call so the following week he calls me on Thursday at 4:00 and this time I take advantage of the call it's not an hour and 40 minutes it's three hours three three hours of questions and answers I wait patiently the next week same time Thursday 4:00 he calls me we have a conversation questions and answers five hours next week Thursday 4 o00 seven hours seven hours of questions and answers no breaks no nothing honestly I didn't know I had that many questions if you had a question I probably asked it I started creating questions started coming up with questions I started studying for the questions sometimes to know if he knew the answer sometimes to know if there is an answer and every single time this Rabbi asked the same question you're not the first guy to ask it he asked it in this year 800 years ago a thousand years ago 2,000 years ago on this G on this page and this is what it says on the spot something a computer couldn't do and I was fascinated something amazing I was considered pretty smart in a secular world but this is something different this is this is divine this is not human this is not supposed to be again according to my knowledge of what Torah is Torah to me at that point was like a book of stories I didn't know Torah does this to your brain I didn't know Torah goes into your brain and starts shaping things up and fixes stuff and you become superhuman I didn't know that's what it does I thought it just you learned some things it's nice story you become a decent human being hopefully you grow a beard you big a hat good luck to you so what Torah he has books I have books mine is archaeology science this that he has gar whatever it has in there what's the big deal and didn't know Torah starts reshaping your inside I didn't know but this is what it does but it takes time takes effort takes you want to change Torah is the only way so I got addicted I saw this is the greatest thing in the world and now all of a sudden I'm starting to get answers one of the most important answers that I got was the one I didn't really like that much but I started getting it what was it there's a reason for all my pain but I don't really like the reason what's the reason hashem's not happy that's the reason hashem's not happy and he started giving me signs and I didn't want to listen therefore he has to give me more signs if someone Shalom drowns they take him out of the water and what do they do in the beginning they slap him around a couple of times hopefully he wakes up he doesn't wake up what do they do they give mouth to mouth which is a little uncomfortable a little inconvenient maybe a combination of slaps and mouth to mouth also gotta do what you got to do if that doesn't work what do they do they bring the electric they start shocking him start electrocuting him you can make a toast on those electric things either becomes toast or becomes a human being again if that doesn't work they call kadish and they say they say on him so he's finished but they don't start with the electric shock they start with the slaps this is no different than hm Hashem initially called you he gives you signs he gives you a flat tire he gives you problems at home he gives you a few more bills than you can afford gives you a few annoying things he even gives you a pimple something get your attention something is above you he wants your attention you reached in your pocket and you grabbed a quarter instead of a dime that's God talking to you he's everywhere he's anywhere and he's talking to you you're not M he's not talking to you face to face he's not talking to you into a burning bush but he's talking to you nonetheless you have to pay attention but you don't want to pay attention and it's time for him it's time for you to pick up the phone so after a few slaps don't work what happens he has to give you mouth to mouth it's a little uncomfortable a little pain little suffering you still don't answer it get you to the point of being electrocuted it's very painful I felt it sucks that doesn't work it's time to go my cousin was in his 20s I didn't know him he lived in America but I'm told that he was a wonderful person lived a secular life didn't really know much about religion but I heard that he was a wonderful wonderful human being this past on the second day of since he didn't come from a Jewish religious home he decided that on the second day of it's a good idea for him to go on a scooter on a scooter to go outside hang out on a scooter innocent peaceful you could even call it exercise what he didn't know that day when he woke up at 26 years old was that it would be the last day of his life because as soon as he got on top of the scooter something happened and he slipped off the scooter no one hit him no one pushed him no one was even around but he slipped off the scooter and he hit his head The Neighbor Next Door saw him she saw that he's on the floor unconscious she called 911 they picked him up they took him to the hospital they gave him a few checks they said don't worry you have a long way way ahead of you everything's going to be okay everything looks okay he says obviously doesn't say those words but he goes back home he's excited to go back to his 26 years of life he goes home he has a little bit of a headache he goes to sleep and he never wakes up again do you think that anyone in their right mind thought that this young 26 year old wonderful human being was going to end so quickly usually when we think of end we think of ah he's gonna 120 at least 120 years old at least he's goingon to be 110 okay maybe this guy he smoked a few cigarettes maybe 75 years old no one thinks of a 26 year old dying but if hasem sees that you're not paying attention and you're not going to and there is no way for you to yes to call it if you did chuva not if you're on a scooter on the second day of if you did chuva yeah or if you died before you were able to do chuva meaning you die as an infant you die as a child before B mitvah you just came here purely for something like that yes but if you're in the age of doing chuva you're the age of observing MIT you don't keep me there's no way that you fulfilled your T because you created new sins that you have to fix them now by not following the tah so now Hashem will give you signs we'll talk to you we'll try to help you try to get you back home son please come home come home come home you're not listening he has to call so now brother frim has these answers and I realized okay ABA has been calling me and I didn't want to pick up the phone that's the reason I hated it I hated it because it was real I hated it because it was right I hated it because it was just I hated it because he was right according to his world I'm living in his world he's not living in mine meaning he calls the shots he's right I didn't listen I didn't do in fact I was married to a non-jew so now I'm realizing I have a problem so I have to start listening more about what he's saying I continue to learn T little by little my wife learns everything that I learn and to cut the story a little shorter than normal she eventually realizes herself that the religion she was in which was Christianity is bogus it's completely made up it's complete nonsense aside from being idolatry it's complete stupidity all you have to do is read The Source they say that their new book their New Testament comes from our old book meaning it's an extension of our book which is called the Old Testament in their language we call it the Torah that means that the first book must agree with the second and the second must agree with the first they can't contradict each other the problem is if you read both books there's nothing but contradictions it's the only thing that exists is contradictions the only thing exist is things that don't agree with each other even things that are simple like numbers for example one of my favorites is the fact that it says in the Tor in no less than three places that yov came down to Egypt with 70 Souls hasem wrote this not even mm wrote that yobu he witnessed he saw he told him what to do he came down to Egypt with 70 Souls the New Testament says 75 all of a sudden we have an extra five people what happened where did these five people come from so this is at least three mistakes another one of my favorites is the way they they translate the word is a huge giant animal that's kind of a mix between a deer and a bull it doesn't exist anymore but it was a huge huge animal big and it even talks about in the days of David about 3,000 years ago in the most popular version out of the 200,000 versions of Christianity's New Testament because they have many versions of the same book because obviously no one knows which one's right that's what happens with lies no one knows which one is the truth which one's a lie it ends up being all a lie but what ends up happening is that the most popular version is called the King James version so the most popular version which means the most accepted one translated the word to a unicorn a unicorn is in cartoons unicorn is not in a real animal somebody made it up as part of fairy tale stories it never existed but that's what happened when you don't he know Hebrew you just create stuff so just like the Unicorn is a fictional animal that's part of kid stories the whole new testament is a fictional story part of like stories that people like to believe one of the most important proofs that you know that Christianity is complete bogus is it doesn't teach reality meaning everyone that lives in the world for more than 13 years and becomes an adult knows that there are consequences to our actions you do good you get good you do bad you get bad that's just reality saying anything otherwise is being intellectually dishonest saying that you do bad you'll get good all the time is just a lie it's not reality saying you do good and you're only going to get bad your whole life is not reality sometimes you'll get good in their book you don't have to do anything just believe in some idiot died 2,000 years ago and everything's okay everything's okay that's not reality that's an intellectual lie anyone that's an intellectual well know this is a lie this cannot come from God why because even people don't live like this so of course their creator wouldn't have a rule like this so this is the stuff that we started discovering and little by little we started realizing Judaism is amazing but initially we thought that conversion was not necessarily part of Judaism because we only heard bad things about conversion we heard that you go turned away and Judaism doesn't really accept conversions and all this hocus bcus nonsense in reality if you actually learn you see that the sages the prophets and the entire Torah is very much a big fan of conversion so much so that it's mentioned more times than any other mitvah in the Tora 36 times 36 times it's mentioned in the Tor what special protection and privileges the converts get from hm so much so that someone that gets in the way of a conversion according to the Tora has no share of the world to come get in the way give you an example from the Tora itself there was a prophet named elahi you know Navi everyone knows Navi right Lazar the Prophet elah The Prophet had a right hand his name was Elisha Elisha Elisha the prophet Alisha had a servant called gazi so gazi wasn't exactly a sadik he liked money too much so one day the non-jewish King was sick with a with a sickness called Sarat and no one was able to heal him until they told him listen there's this Prophet the Jewish Prophet called Elisha maybe he could help you he says bring him Elisha came with his assistant gazi he looked at him he saw that he's a decent human being and he saw there's big potential in this King to be good and he healed him on the spot the King was so fascinated said how did you do it what did you do I'm like oh this is part of the Torah and so on and so forth It's all from Hashem so how much should I pay you I could give you half my kingdom whatever you want I'll pay you just healed me it's amazing he goes no no no this is only for Hashem we do for free Elisha not accepting money impressed the king even more than Elisha healing him because in the world of the king everyone did everything just for money so all of a sudden this guy just gave him life all over again for free to him this was amazing he says I want to be like you I want to be Jewish Alicia says no worry I'll help you you want to be Jewish you got to learn you got to do this you got to do that I'll help you he goes on his way the king is excited but gazi the assistant is not so excited why he says we just missed out on a bankroll we just missed out on a big cash day we're going to go back to the desert we can have a castle instead what does he do this G he goes back to the King goes listen my leader my my my my master he's very he's very honest he's very humble he's very this he's very that he's sadik he's not going to ask you for money but in reality he needs some stuff he needs he needs six suits he needs this he needs that the king says no problem I'll give him whatever he wants but now now the king says but this was after all it was for money so I like Judaism but I'm not going to convert anymore I like Judaism it's good it's nice aim but I'm not converting anymore why it's all about money it's tainted he tainted the religion for him when Elisha the prophet found out that g did this he cursed him has no share of the world to come why you got in the way of a Jew you he was supposed to be a Jew one day do you know what it's like to bring a Jew to the world the whole world was worth it to build it for just one Jew any one of you in this room saying amen one time in your life was worth it for hem to create the entire world for all of the problems all of the pilgrims all of the Holocaust all of the suffering all of the craziness that ever happened in the world was worth it for hem to create just for one of you to say amen amen one time in your life that's how much hasem loves you you understand how much he loves you you say Amen one time so now this killed an opportunity of someone saying amen several times a day just in the morning several more times a day in the afternoon learning Torah all day maybe even converting other people family kids and so on he ruined it about that's how much hem loves a Jew so we didn't know this we thought that Jud you know Judaism doesn't have conversion thousand so meaning that it's even more more important than amen and it keeps going higher and all of it goes up eventually gets to a point where one word One of T is I think worth somewhere in the neigh of 100,000 amends one letter and T is worth about 100,000 amends so you reading just the word you have a half a dozen letters you just fulfilled 600,000 amends over a half a million amends over a half a million reasons for hem to create the world just for you you said imagine you learn T imagine you learn a whole you know you're obligated to learn every week you have to learn not just like watch the Youtube video and that's it learn the actual read with a mid read a little bit takes a little bit of time every day you learn it huge every word every word has at least three letters an average some words have a little less but most words have at least three letters each time each letter it's 100,000 amends 100,000 reasons for to create the world for you imagine how happy is when you learning to it doesn't matter if you understand don't understand you're starting out but imagine how much your father in Heaven is jumping in Joy when you learning you have a 11 12 o'clock at night learning Tor it's much more valuable than the pizza and the cookies much more valuable much more valuable than Sprite that's what he created the world for now when you don't know this you're missing out Hashem says you have no idea what you're missing out on I have to wake you up I have to wake you up to for you I'm waking you up the pain is for you it's not for him he doesn't get joy out of giving you pain it's for you the pain so I didn't like the answer because I knew it was right and we continued learning eventually my wife realized that not only is Christianity bogus but conversion is very much welcomed in Judaism she converted but as soon as she found out the truth she became more religious than me one day and one day she took on everything I'm still playing around a little bit I'm serious but I'm like you know like I'm not like all in like 75% in her one day I'm all in whatever she knew she took everything everything anything we knew it we did it that's chuva that's real chuva you want to be saved mashia comes tomorrow next week next year next month whenever it is 10 years from now whenever you want to be saved you have to be all in it's not a matter of you knowing everything it's not about that nobody is expecting you to be the G it's not that but whatever you know do you know you have to do after you eat do it don't eat just because you don't want to eat by the way which is really stupid because the number one blessing in Judaism for is he wants G for making money do at least once a day you want to make money do you don't want to make money don't do don't eat you don't want to be rich people always ask me you make money make money make money why because you're thanking hem 100 times for giving you something to eat that made you full 100 times for something to eat Made You full he says oh let me give him more to eat let me give him even more fancy stuff to eat let me give him a fancy house to eat the food that he likes he's so excited about your you say no no is this pizza or if it's if it's Mi I'm not eating it if it's Mi I'm not eating it I need Meson Pizza I need Meson Pizza by the way that's all nonsense 99% of pizza is 100% mi in order for it to be it will be 10 times the price it'll be much much more expensive than $15 $20 so MZ Pizza is a little bit don't play with that you eat one slice it's a regular size slice eat another half a slice just do the do the number one yeah you're getting yourself out of doubt and number two it's the number one blessing in Jud it's more important than it's more important than it's more important than is more important than why because is the only only that's written directly in the Tora it says not not it's written doesn't say do it twice a day we learn it from to do it twice a day but it's not literal also we learned from to do it but it's not literal is literal outright it says you have to bless when you eat who wrot first part first paragraph who wrote it wrote the first paragraph of second paragraph Yes yesh anyone that can get that I appreciate it who wrote second paragraph of who wrote second paragraph of like the where is going so second paragraph after M yeshu yeshu Yeshua this is not like some uh local tiny little Rabbi just passed this m last week yesu Bon Yeshua benon after that who wrote the next part schav mashia mashia is coming from DAV he wrote the next part after that from greatest Sages of all time that's that's we say no no let me do let me do it's number one blessing in all of Judaism we're skipping it people complain abouta all the time is a key TOA you wanta do at least once a day you want good health do is thaning HEM that your body works in about a month from now we're going to get our shipment of cards I'll send it to you guys it's something to have on your walls it's free of charge you want to donate you could donate you want to take it free take it free to me the only thing that matters is you actually doing it every time you go to the bathroom you read this why because you don't want to deal with what I dealt with you see all the health nightmares I'm talking to you about that's because the body stopped working every time you go to the bathroom you say it works I went to the bathroom I went it's big deal trust me it's a big deal you can't go to the bathroom or you go too much or something doesn't work in your body you're going to hate the day you were born I lived it for seven years every time you go to the bathroom you should thank hem more than you thank AEM for anything else why because it's m a miracle it's a miracle that you can take food you take all the nutrients from this food gain from all the nutrients and anything that's no good for you comes out of the body you don't have to press any buttons and on top of it it tastes good depends who your wife is if you doesn't know how to cook then it's not that good my wife tastes good you put this outside of your bathroom it's made out of plastic so it doesn't go bad even if there's some water on it even some this you wipe it off you put it on your wall you say it there's going to be two holes on top like this one and it reminds you to say it after you say it a bunch of times you can remember it by heart but it's still a biggest G and a biggest to read it directly from the page why because when you read the words in the Holy language it helps you with so this if you don't have this card get something for now in about a month from now we're going to have them distribute I'll send it to a or to somebody here that to to give them out to you guys but you should start doing it right now you want to be healthy you do you want to have you do these are basic level things basic level things we take for granted I took all of this for granted but eventually hasem says okay enough's enough he sent me a fry and I started learning with a FR and little by little we realize what kind of trouble we were in but we started getting ourselves out of trouble but when hem is happy with you he makes the world around you change schl said when Hashem is happy with you he even makes your enemies come to you and say I'm sorry now we haven't gotten necessarily to that point but he did make some other miracles for us on the day that my wife converted I had a very very deep painful absess infection and even though we were supposed to have oura the same day to make sure that everything is kosher because we're already together we said that we can't make it to the the only thing we can make it to is the hospital finish the conversion and go to the hospital I have to have an emergency surgery interestingly enough if the Miracles that we saw in this point up to this point were not enough and I haven't even told you 10% of them hasem made another Big Miracle happen as soon as she dipped in the mik my pain stopped stopped I didn't know why it stopped but I said okay honey this is amazing but I don't have any pain anymore so who wants to go to the hospital with no pain I don't want to go with the pain you want me to go without the pain okay fine so we went to where we were supposed to go said oh let me change I go to the bathroom to change and I take off my pants and I see that my whole body is full of blood the surgery happened it just didn't require doctors infection was healed don't ask me how don't ask me why I don't know all I know is that it happened from that moment on my my health continued to improve and little by little I started understanding why somebody like R frim is so excited and addicted to Torah it's magical it's amazing it's better than anything you can possibly imagine even without the Miracles I told you about you want something you want you want to get to a high level of Tor you want to get to a high level of you have to try you have to give 100% of your effort into it you have to get to a point of being taking it seriously I'm not talking about just learning 15 minutes here and there watching one of my short clips and thinking that's your liut T that's good that's G to get you good on the way to work while you're smoking a cigarette on the way uh back from the gym whatever get in a small clip five minutes 10 minutes it's good it's healthy you should always have on your on you know watching it or listening to it but 5 10 minutes a day is not enough my friends that's how you start I started with 15 minutes a day but my 15 minutes meant that there was no such thing as not having it 15 minutes had to happen maybe more but never less there was never a skipped day that's how I started I asked ra listen I'm already learning with you for seven hours can't I just do eight hours and skip the rest of the week he said actually which you can do is skip the seven hours just do 15 minutes a day the 15 minutes a day is more important than the S hours in one day and asked him how could it be he said give you an example if I told you you need to eat but you could eat as much as you want however you want I said okay great what can I eat he said anything you want I said terrific he said but you could only eat once a week I said that's not going to work he says exactly your needs to eat every day even if it's only 15 minutes a day you must feed it every day having here every week is good 10 o'clock at night you guys come out you have some popcorn you have some this yes I'm not it's good it's great it's not enough you got to have oxygen for your every day got to come to you gotta come you gotta learn you got to do something you got to learn toah every day even if it's only 15 minutes a day why because you're feeding your you can't starve your own and thinking you're going to get a good result at the end of the week by the time you make it once a week your n is dying finally finally you gave me some Tora you have to do something and it's very easy to learn to today doesn't always have to be in books you could watch videos you could listen to it in in the next month or two we're going to be coming out with an app you could listen to all the shim on an app you could already listen to them on Soundcloud on YouTube on my website.org it's very easy the Tor told us told to tell us the Torah is not in heaven meaning it's easy even more so in our generation even more so now if it's not far away you have to go to a town that's uh 60 miles away like the sages used to have to go to sometime they' have to travel two three days two three days says the biggest they get is from travel that's how far it was now you don't have to travel anywhere all you got to do is you have a phone press play press play you have over 200 shim that I did over 250 different clips different topics different issues even my personal story I try to have different each time I'm not the only guy you have he's been making thousands and thousands of sh for 23 years every sh is golden it's easy you don't want to reach you don't want to watch listen to you have books read get you have right over there m is greatest mid that exists it gives you the mid of the Tor in a story format Rabbi Ki wrote it 300 years ago he used to fast for a whole week for a whole week of yov Ki used to fast for a whole week from Shabbat to Friday why he wanted to make sure he only has Tor why you could have mid sitting over there collecting dust no so you read it you pick it up say what did he say why do you have to fast the whole week to read this every book has five six 700 sources Z M everything you have it sitting on a shelf you got to read it everything you want it says in a story format it's addictive this is the cure my friends this is the cure you start learning you start putting into your system you start seeing the wiring in your brain start changing doesn't happen overnight you start seeing your n fixed you start seeing things happen doesn't happen overnight sometimes takes longer for some people sometimes takes less but you have to do it you have to do it for yourself invest into yourself which questions hav I answered okay so give me some new ones yeah how did you start your how was your process okay so first process was my robt told me that I have to learn every day he said more important than any mitvah that you're gonna do you have to learn so told us that leave my Tor leave me but don't leave my Torah why because you leave me and have my Torah you'll have your way home it's a map to come back home it's a map to come back to Hashem but if you leave my Torah and only believe in Hashem eventually you're going to leave hem too because you need the Torah to continue believing in hem you need the Torah to know what hasem actually wants from you so first thing he said is you have to learn every day learn 15 minutes a day that was my first commitment I'm going to learn 15 minutes a day beyond the commitment of learning within the seven hours that I enjoyed which to me wasn't even learning was just G so I started learning 15 minutes a day little by little I started realizing oh you know what I can't continue learning this stuff believing it saying it's right and not doing anything so I said okay you know what I'm gonna start praying I start doing every day iine I started praying I started you know getting into it but I only prayed once a day little by little I started saying you know it's not so right that I only pray once a day I mean gotta pray at least twice so I pray twice a day which one I pray sometimes it was sometimes it was sometimes what have I picked and choose after a little while I say you know what twice a day is not really kosher it's like half a kosher it's like a half a koser so okay so we got to start praying three times a day so little by little I start praying three times a day then after that I started you know I started seeing little by little that 15 minutes a day is just not enough I wanted to study more so I find myself studying instead of 15 minutes an hour two hours three hours so I said you know what instead of it just being an accident let me do it on purpose let me commit to more than 15 minutes a day from now on it's an hour a day so now I made a rule that from now on it's going to be at least an hour a day no matter what I had to study an hour a day so I study an hour a day the more you study the more things change and you start taking on mitv so now a holiday came up I said okay I don't know this holiday I don't know much about it I start asking RAB what is this holiday and everything I had had questions I'd ask them that's why one of the most important things to do in chuva is to make yourself a rabbi without making yourself a Raba your chuva is going for a rocky ride you're not going to know what to do and like I said in earlier today in the um in it actually talks about somebody that wants to be their own Rabbi somebody wants to be their own rabbi says you want to be your own Rabbi you want to make your own you want to make your own thing just read the book and decide for yourself what it means just so you know in sh hates you you keep Shabbat you keep you keep you keep everything but God hates you why does he hate you because you're such a gan you're so prideful you're not even willing to double check if you're right or wrong meaning you could be asav for seven years and not even know it you could do something wrong for seven years without even knowing it who do you think you are going to not listen to anybody go to the local Rabbi he studied his whole life not like you for six months not like you for six years he studied his whole life double check maybe you're wrong maybe you're wrong if you're wrong it means it could be life for death you're so confident in yourself you have to make yourself a rabbi page 109b so this is the type of stuff that's very very important for you to know you need to have a rabbi you need to learn every day I started adding adding to the learning adding to the learning and adding to the started keeping fasts all of a sudden I started fasting on all of a sudden I started fasting on all of a sudden all of these things became made sense to me of course I realized that I wanted to keep this tor and one of the par and the Tor says that if you eat non koser food it imp purifies your body but not in a sense of imp purifies it where you become sick physically and purifies it in a sense where you become spiritually sick you can still build buildings you can still do math problems in your head you can still write books but as far as understanding Torah or remembering it not possible you'll lose most of what you learn why because you have a impure Soul because everything that you eat turns to blood and the Torah says your blood that's your n so if if the blood if the blood is coming from an impure animal that means that your n is impure partially impure so to add Tora which is the only thing that's pure in this world to an impure you have a problem so you're not going to keep all this Tora so I said I want to keep this to I'm working really hard to keep to learn this to I don't want to lose it so I start eating kosher inside the house and outside the house first it was because I wanted to keep my Torah then it was because I realized that God is also outside the house sowhere God is everywhere but again in the beginning you don't realize he's everywhere you think he's just somewhere so I started praying I started doing lay I started learning started keeping holidays and the more and more and more I started realizing that I'm not the only one so the next big thing that I did is I decided that I need to try to help other people I have to try to help other people realize what I realize so I started giving out CDs for Rabbi mrai started sponsoring CDs for Rabbi mrai and I also started giving out the book uh science comes of age or the coming Revolution by Rabbi zamir Cohen uh that's uh was translated to English and a few other little trinkets like baz and other stuff I would send packages to people and I also built a uh YouTube channel to record uh the sh by RAB K my ra so I start he start I sent them you know the whatever he needed to with the camera and everything else to set himself up and every time he did a sh he would record it and he would send it to me in a USB or email or whatever it was and I started putting it online so I started publicizing his channel I started a group on Facebook called Torah lessons to help our lives and the initial two members were me and him only he was not really him because he was never on the internet it was really me twice today we have about 10,000 people people it's one of the biggest Jewish groups on Facebook like religious Jewish groups on Facebook think maybe top two top three there's not unfortunately there's not too many really big uh religious groups on Facebook started just with me and him or really me twice and then other people started joining and so on and so forth other rabbis also Post in there too so I started posting for him I started sending people some CDs I started sending people some books and all of a sudden I started seeing what the Prophet Jeremiah meant the Prophet Jeremiah was told something by hasem that's very special about kiru which actually is the one question I didn't answer so it's good you're reminded me in chapter 15 verse 19 it says the following K doing helping other people do chuva somebody asked me about it either you or somebody else asked me about it I forgot to answer so it's called you asked the same question somebody else answer but we both forgot so the Prophet Jeremiah says the following he says so therefore hasem said if you do chuva I will bring you back and let you stand before me meaning your chuva regardless of what sin you made whether it's wasting seed even idol worship even idol worship you could do chuva hasm said you could do chuva to such an extent that you could be considered one of the most righteous people that ever lived to such an extent that you can go on a higher level than aik someone that's religious from birth a has an opportunity to get to a higher level higher level how could he get to a higher level if he does CH that gets to a point of having and not just if he has both fear and love of hem now kazal says having fear of hem only is connection to Hashem but it's incomplete it's good but it's not complete having connection to Hashem just loving him is nothing it doesn't exist it's not possible why because if you need to love something you need to know what it is if you know what God is of of course you're going to be scared which means it's either only or so says if you get to the levels of used to be Idol worshiper intermarried all these things you now get to a point of having you are considered on a higher level than someone that's been righteous his whole life everyone here in this room has the opportunity to do that even more so the Prophet Jeremiah says if you help help somebody else do that you give him a CD Rabbi ruven his CD from Wall Street to the Western Wall rabbi mrai Torah and science Rabbi Al Naas near-death experience whatever CD is motivating you like it you give it to somebody cost a dollar you give it to somebody that guy listens to the CD you give him a link for free it's on the internet you go to bash.org pick any one of my lectures you press copy press paste text it somebody listens somebody does chuva goes to your credit Hashem says you're gonna be like my mouth meaning you pray I do you pray for something I'll do it why you're special you're VIP you're VIP you want a real story I'll tell you a real story live from today today live I said it already from early today but it's such a good story I say twice in one day I have two students that are not only do they do chv keep learn T but they're also very involved in kiru one of them works for me and is an amazing human being and each one of the people on team Hashem has different Miracles you had some of my past lectures you see some of the stories I tell about people that work for team hasem it's unbelievable most of them are working for for free so he works and he helps us with website movies and so on anyway he told me today that they came to me they came uh they came to us and asked us for some advice about his wife's job I told him listen this is what you should do you should start already setting up things to a point where you can work from home it's going to be easy for you to raise kids it's going to be easy for you to be a wife it's going to be easy for you to learn and so on but you work for a company and you know it's they can't trust you to work from home day one or after 6 months only you start setting it up they like you they're paying you they think you're great setting it up what you do you hire an assistant you tell the boss you need to get an assistant because he likes you and he thinks you're wonderful says I need an assistant to help me better be better hire an assistant and teach her all the things you need to that you need to do yourself but you don't really need to do yourself somebody else can do it teach her all that stuff if it's packing boxes if it's writing basic emails like the major stuff you do but small stuff get somebody else to do it teach her how to do it little by little she'll be good and eventually you can be more productive you can make more money for the company because you can do more of what you do best and if you're making more money for the company it doesn't matter where you work from work from home work from Afghanistan work from uh the office doesn't make a difference you make more money for the company they don't care where you work from so this is what you tell them this is your plan she goes good idea how do I tell him I said call him tell him meet him whatever she's a little shy God bless her which is a very good character trait but a few hours ago she sends me a text and says you're never going to believe it the miracle happened today I went to work and my boss came to me I was planning on telling him exactly what you said but he came to my office and he beat me to it and he says to me you know what I think you need an assistant and I think you need to teach your assistant to do all the things that you shouldn't be doing so you can make more money for the company you want hasem to fulfill what you say you get his children back home you get his children back home you get them back home he's missing he misses them ABA is looking for them ABA is looking for them and he needs you to help him he's looking for them you're the one that could find him now Imagine a King has all the money in the world all the power in the world but he only has one kid one kid kid one day gets lost do you think all the money matters nothing you think all the power matters nothing 10 15 years later some guy calls him he says hey Mr King how are you how are you why you calling me mister I'm King he says listen let's let's not mind the formalities I just want to send you a text and show you a picture he sends him a picture he says oh is this your son says yes this is my son where is he he's in my house you want me to bring him over absolutely bring him over you bring him over and says hey you Mr King call me mister call me Uncle call me ABA call me whatever you want how would you find my son oh I found him in the woods he's been lost for a long time now the guy that brought the son back do you think the king's going to forget about him let him go hungry he let him go homeless is going to let him go suffer or the opposite or he's going to give put him on a VIP list anytime this guy wants anything he gets it you don't have to be a genius you understand so this is why doing kiru is the number one thing you can possibly do and when people ask me why did I leave Wall Street that's the reason why even though I could go back to being on Wall Street and within maybe two years I could probably be a millionaire again it's better for me to live off of donations and miracles every month and have no idea I'm going to pay rent no idea I'm going to pay anything no idea I'm going to work or do anything all I know is I can learn T I could teach people to do chuv it's better for me to learn and live like that than to have two three four five $500 million in the bank it's all worthless in comparison to one hour of toah once you know what to is now some of you understand what I say some of them you don't some of you understand some some of you understand more what I'm telling you is whatever you want to be as far as material I got there I got to the end zone I got there I saw it I'm not saying don't waste your time and don't try to make money everybody needs to make a living at some point or another but if you have a choice you can go to Yesa go to Yesa you have a choice watch a football game or learn tah learn T you have a choice waste your time waste your life or actually do chuva the choice is obvious because this is how you get to be happy I didn't know this so when I had all the money in the world I didn't have happy happy free next question we covered everything no did I pray eventually yes oh no tonight no I haven't prayed our I still have to pray our so let's do our amen amen [Music] [Applause] [Music] n [Music]