What are we missing? Why do we fast on the 9th of Av? - Rabbi Alon Anava

[Music] so tomorrow will come before and we're not going to have to fast but if Shalom mashia is going to decide to wait one more day and tomorrow we have to fast on tshav and a lot of people wonder besides the fasting and being hungry really what is the point of the fast and what do I need to to focus on and just sitting at home being hungry is one thing but if I'm fasting already and I'm commemorating the day one needs to really know what do I need to focus on now in most cases will always fall close to the par of what we just read this past Shabbat and even though we read the parasa and usually it will go retroactively on the entire week this week we're reading parat so this week has the energy of the parasha and usually the week after I don't have anything to do with the parasa but explains in the Z that all the days after Shabbat get blessed from that Shabbat meaning that the energy and the message of the paraa of the previous week is also just be careful with the camera you have to smile when you pass so so even though the Paras passed already the following week still carries the energy of the previous Shabbat so the last par that we read the par of it's talking about the history of the Jews and how they went out of Egypt what happened all that stuff which raises a question why do we really need the history why do I need history if history cannot be changed and it's in the past what's the point of learning history constantly repeating the history and commemorating the history because in history lies the path and the guide for the future in history is the message of what I need to change in the future therefore I constantly look at history in order to be able to know what to change in the future which comes to teach me why am I commemorating tab every year to look at history what happened and to be able to learn for my mistakes so originally tab we said that the spies came back so what was the sin of the spies they talk L and they talk L about the land of Israel you go now to most of the countries now was in America but you go to many other countries and you talk about Israel and maybe on the option of coming and doing aah then you hear about Israel no it's a hard place there's no jobs there there's Terror attacks there the the weather is horrible and all these things you know I was now in New York the weather is worse in New York than here I was shvitzing there like an animal and I was like this is horrible here the weather in Israel is 10 times better everybody's talking everybody's talking about how bad the weather is but every everywhere I went and I always promote people to do alah and people always talk about Israel and the fact is that Israel is the best place in the world it has if you look at the bad then you'll see the bad but if you look at the good you'll see how much good it is and somebody told me now in New York because we talked about Aliyah and the husband wants to move to Israel the wife doesn't want to move to Israel so he we spoke together and the wife was like saying look how dangerous it is in Israel look at what's going on now in in in the Temple mount it was the week with all the action I told I'm very sorry to tell you I'm very sad with what's going on in yush and it's horrible and no person no person should be hurt but if you compare now Jerusalem and New York or you know forget about Jerusalem compare the entire land of Israel and New York in Israel you have one stabbing a day and in New York you have a thousand stabbing a day so the ratio of murder and crime and robbing and stabbing in a city a peaceful City like New York is a thousand times more than in in jam and in Israel so you know what Israel is not that dangerous you go to certain places you will find there some some horrible things I was in London a month ago there's much more problems with the Muslims in London than what we have in Israel by the way I was in Golden Green a 20 minute drive in Stanford Hill every day there was Muslims there stabbing and killing and and hitting and everybody was worried about are you there I was I'm not there I'm 20 minutes away so Israel is not that bad we have to learn from our past we cannot talk L about Israel and we cannot talk L period but then what was the next time the next thing that we had a a a bad thing on Tab was of course the destruction of this first temple which the first temple was destroyed from idol worship forbidden relations and bloodshed now since the sin was not was revealed then the length of the Exile was revealed when they left yush the prophet told them you're living for 70 years and after 70 years they came back to Earth Israel but again looking back at our history we have to commemorate and understand what happened wrong in in history then there was idol worship we don't have idol worship so much in our generation but our our idol worship the translation of the word idol worship is aod something that is foreign not necessarily bowing down on the ground to a statue aod is a job or a labor or an action and Zar is foreign anything that is foreign to me as a Jew is considered idol worship and for me something that is not on the path of the Torah is foreign therefore in our days there are many forms of idol worship some people worship their car and they're washing twice a day today in our generation there's a new form of idolatry and that's called an iPhone or Samsung or whatever you call it a smartphone everybody is attached to this piece of metal and if this piece of metal is not in their eyesight for more than 3 seconds there's a problem that can cause a crisis now where's my phone that's a in some point of a way that's a form of Idol worship that I I can't be without it they call it in our generation an addiction there's no such a thing as an addiction it's just a weakness for something that I can't control something is controlling me before I became religious I was addicted to everything and I got to the realization that I was like I don't want to be controlled by any substance or anything I used to smoke I was a very heavy smoker and I said I am not going to let a stick of nicotine control my life what I have to every 5 minutes go out and if I don't have my cigarettes I'll get all uptight and if I go on a plane not to smoke for 11 hours so I was like you know what I'm not going to let let a stick of the nicotine control my life so I quit smoking so the reality is that we are I don't like using that word but we are addicted to so many things in our generation and some things they seem harmful people are addicted to Facebook they can't get off it they get on and then 3 4 hours later somebody has to rip them off the computer that's an addiction because there's nothing good going on there go for 5 minutes share your post read some other post check your messages say hello and move on when you're sitting in front of the screen for more than two hours you have to tell yourself I have a problem because it's the same junk and people get addicted to something as simple as Facebook it's not so simple by the way if you find that you're wasting 3 hours a day on something like that that's not normal some people are addicted to their phone they can't walk around without the phone some people are now now of course it gets developed into things that are more severe to medication to all sorts of other things today you unfortunately many people fall into the addiction of drugs and alcohol but now there's you know in the groups the anonymous groups once there was AA and na Anon Narcotics Anonymous and and Alcoholic Anonymous now there's all the letters b a r a b ta a all these where where these letters come out from this is eating disorder sleeping disorder this this so we are in a generation that we don't bow to Idols but we do fall into some type of idolatry that I cannot live without something which that also needs to be to be observed and to reflect on it then we had blooded and we had forbidden relations forbidden relations is not much to explain unfortunately the majority of the world are failing in that that's there's not much to to to talk here and bloodshed Bloodshed is not necessarily killing somebody with a knife sometimes just insulting somebody that's considered Bloodshed or talking to about somebody and making him look bad in front of the entire Community that's also Bloodshed this is why the first temple was destroyed but we're now technically mourning the destruction of the second temple not the first first because that's closer to us and that's what more recent to what we lost and what we are mourning here is the fact that the second temple was destroyed from a very horrible sin that is called ha hating another person for no reason and since the sin is not revealed then the length of the Exile is not revealed I mean I can smile at you all day long and pretend that you are my friend and inside I hate you so the sin is not revealed with Bloodshed or idol worship or forbidden relations it's obvious you can see the sin you can't see the sin I can be your friend for years and you will not know that I hate you or that I talk bad about you so since the sin is not revealed and the length of the Exile is not revealed and I know there are many different theories why we are still in Exile one Rabbi will say because of this another Rabbi will say of that it's all right but ultimately we are still in Exile because of and believe it or not it still exists it still exists in such a horrible way that I told you every time I go on a trip then that I go to teach and to inspire and to lecture but I always get something some type of a message every every trip there's some type of a theme if you remember we spoke about the trip in London that I came back the theme was thank thanking thanking Hashem constantly thanking hasem for everything that you don't have for things that you do have for all your problems is thanking but in this theme besides the thanking which was also the same I noticed something so so annoying every place that I went every place and I went to many different communities there was a question that that everybody was they was on the tip of their tongue some were more courteous they waited an hour to ask me some were less courteous they waited 5 minutes to ask me some had the patience so they didn't have the courage and it took them half a day to ask me but in all the places that I went to there was a question and I saw and noticed on the per people that I'm talking with that they're like I can't wait to get the question asked and to get the answer yesterday I told you in the in the meal like the theme with Roger abbit you know the the the Disney cartoon that they has a tune so the theme with Roger abbit is and you wait for the right so the same thing was in all these places that I went like uh 20 Questions leading to the 10 and what was this annoying question what are you I'm a man you don't believe that I'm a man I can prove that no no no no what are you um a human being that I can see but what are you I'm a Jew oh know come on what are you what are you are you sping are you bre you you where are you that was the theme of course I'm making it more H but believe it or not there were places there what are you what does it matter what am I I'm a human being they you not like the answer I'm a human being or I'm a Jew what are you and I said you know what I am nothing it doesn't matter what I am I'm a Jew I follow the Torah and I believe in God and you see that I went to one community all they had to say is bad things about the other community and then I went to the other community and they said bad things about this community and unfortunately every community that I went to that was emphasized that I saw this hate to other places and you know it's very easy to see like I said to be positive and see all the communities have amazing character traits and qualities and but when you really go to the to the depth to the pinpoint you see that there's this subtle hate between the communities I went to one Community they tell me where's your lecture tomorrow I'll tell them over there and all sorts of these faces and the next day I would go to one where were you yesterday I was in that Community oh I'll never do business with them why oh they're I don't want to talk L but it always starts with I don't want to talk L but there's Al always a but that but Pro probably is some some way protected from the L so the sad reality was that everywhere that I went that was the theme and I kept telling everybody we're in the 3 weeks we are mourning the destruction of the temple we are trying to arouse in us the knowledge and the awareness of that we have to accept everybody and love each other equally doesn't matter how they look what's their background what's the type of Sido they pray why are you asking me what I am does it matter what I am if I'm going to tell you I belong to this group or that group is it going to change your opinion about me yes it would and that's the sad reality that if you belong somewhere then we don't hear what you have to say how about you hear what have to say and then you judge me and unfortunately in many communities if you belong to a different group they then they they don't approve you're not going to be invited there you not going to be getting a stage over there and you know you asked me before where am I speaking in California I don't create the tours we have many different people that they help us they they're in touch with different organizations people contact us to invite me for lectures I don't don't want to deal with it because unfortunately there's politics in that even then believe it or not the politics where is he from what is his background who's his Rabbi who does he go by there's one community that I came in which I have very very a a strong help from above and I told you that in the last trip in London I was able to get into some school system that nobody was ever able to penetrate into the school system on Friday there was a young man here from England and he told told me how was your trip I told him you know I was able to get into that school and to lectures he he was shocked he was like what nobody ever went into these schools so it's the same thing with certain communities so there was one community that people from the community this requested for me to come there I had to go through a whole investigation before I was allowed to come into the community where did he study who's his Rabbi what's his opinions they had to watch my videos to see what I'm talking about and and I was accepted so and everybody was like nobody ever went into this community they only take the rabbis from the community how did you get in well you bribed somebody and this is the sad reality that we're still seeing in the year 5,777 or 2017 that there are still communities and people that they judge you they box you they categorize you and if you're not according to their specifications we don't want to hear you so the sad reality is that that's one thing that I met in many of the places that I went to and we had the to give two three lectures every day which means every day somewhere else and there were large lectures there wasn't lectures of 20 people there were lectur of hundreds of people and in every place that's what was pinching my heart why do I still have to give excuses to people why do people look at me like how you dress is your coat long is your coat short look at your beard where's your PE where what are you I'm an enigma for people because I don't come and Su State I belong to this group because I don't belong to a group I don't want to belong to a group you know in my path when I became religious I went TOA and I love the Yesa but I didn't love the fact that there was a lot of going there everybody else is disqualified the ashim are wrong theim are crazy this group are this and everybody else is wrong we are the number one we are we are the truth and our Rabbi is the only Rabbi and everybody else is worthless just he's the the one I'm not going to mention names some point I was like doesn't do that doesn't sound to me like the Torah so I went to another Yesa and I went to a breast of Yesa and the teaching was unbelievable unbelievable teaching but I heard the same thing we are the right ones and our rebi is the only rebi and there's nobody else and so I went to another that teaches the the the path of the ash the B and I heard the exact same thing and then I went TOA and I heard the exact same thing we are the only ones and our re is the top and come on what is this the EUR Vision there is a competition here whose rebi is more better than the other rebi and who's more right than the other so there's nothing wrong with belonging to a group or community and there's nothing wrong with following a rabbi you have to follow a rabbi and you have to have a path but when it brings animosity and hate and judgmental and all these character traits that are negative towards another group that beats the point that totally beats the point and if you cannot handle the fact that there's a group that is different from you to a point that you're going to badmouth them and and argue to a point that becomes fighting and violence and that's not the Torah the Torah is not about arguments the Torah is about peace the Torah only promotes peace one of hashem's names is Shalom all the prayers that we focus on is about peace you pray niely you pray we finish The Prayer by saying Shalom put peace on everybody one of the most famous prayers that everybody knows and we add it in the prayer of kadish shalom hem does peace he comes to promote peace Shalom everything is Shalom all our prayers is about peace we don't have a prayer that's talking about an argument and there we have everybody doing the opposite of Peace so unfortunately human nature brings us to a point that we are competitive we are judgmental we we we group ourselves the Torah is not about grouping ourselves we have tribes and there's a reason why we have tribes and believe it or not even when we had tribes in the beginning they didn't intermar between the tribes but later on the tribes did intermar but we don't have right now we don't know who we are nobody can come and say I'm from this tribe the only ones who know which tribe they belong to is the Levis and the co and the priests the kohanim they know there from the tri of Lei but you believe it or not most of the Kim in our generation they're not really Kim we how do we really know some can really track their lineage or DNA and when you go to the DNA that's when you find out that there are many people that they think they're Kim and they're not Kim I have a very good friend that for Generation they thought they're Levis and when he got married and the rabbi went through all theba and he wanted to see proof and they found out they tracked it back and he found out he's not even a Levi but really the only ones who can really know which tribe they are the Kim and theim and very few people do have uh uh proof of lineage and they can track their lineage I know a family in America that they have a proof and tracking themselves back to Rashi and Rashi we know was a direct descendant of David who was from the tribe of Yuda so they know they're from their from this is from their tribe but most people they don't know which tribe they are I don't know which tribe I am there's many people who say we are only all the Jews in the world that are are now obviously Jews they're from the tribe of yudah everybody else they're lost tribes they don't even know who they are where they're from now many people are coming from many different communities saying we're from the tribe of mashe we're from the tribe of Ephraim nobody can come and say we don't believe you who are you to say I don't believe you they're finding now all sorts of tribes in Africa and the Far East that they have a Torah they say they read they have mashia is going to come very soon is going to start pointing out at everybody and say you from this tribe you're from this tribe you some this tribe he's also going to add another thing you're Jewish you're Jewish you're not Jewish you're Jewish you're not Jewish I you know how many people think they're Jewish and they're not even Jewish and you know people don't think know that they're Jewish and they're Jewish people evaluate that we're about 15 to 20 million Jews in the world which I don't see how but I think we're close to to 100 million Jews maybe even more because you know how many Jews are around the world that they don't know they're Jewish millions they saying they that in Spain every six Spaniard is a Jew after the Spanish Inquisition you have about 45 million Jews million people in Spain that's 7 million Jews in Spain that they don't even know the Jewish that's the source the the root of the soul the 600,000 is the roots of the soul but if you look at a tree a tree has a trunk and then branches and then more branches and more branches so there's 600 Roots 600,000 Roots but from that it developed for Millions now we're not going to get into that whole issue but I do believe that we are tens of millions of Jews and I every day we find people people find out that they're the Jewish you know how many Jews were left in Europe in the Holocaust how many Jews 90% of the Jews in Russia 150 years ago because of Communism they just stopped becoming Jews because if you would just Brink in the in the direction of Judaism you would get killed 90% of the Jews in Russia said okay who needs this headache I'll become a communist and I'll I don't need this you how many Jews are in Russia how many Jews in South America so and in the all the Arab countries and how many times I shared with you my father was born in Lebanon his parents are from Syria he told me that my great-grandfather had a a brother who had a daughter at the time it was very common that the girls would get kidnapped they they they would they would kidnap the Jewish girls cuz they were Fair they were nice looking they were considered good quality women and they would sell them to other tribes and the girl will just disappear and you had to deal with it that's the reality no FBI no Interpol no police so my great-grandfather's niece was kidnapped and they looked for her a little bit and that's it then you can find her couple years later one of the family members was a merchant and he traveled and he found her in Jordan but she was already married she had kids and this is not the type of people that you can tell them listen this is my family give her uh this is a a not the type of individuals that you can come with requests so she stayed there and that was normal and it was normal that every like in our generation It's Kind it's not normal but almost any second family has a a person with a horrible disease and it's acceptable it's not acceptable but so 100 years ago every second family the child was kidnapped so what does that mean that means that I have cousins in Jordan I mean this is four generations back but she had kids they're Jewish they have kids they have kids they have kids you how many millions of Jews are around us in Jordan and Saudi Arabia and Iraq and Persia and Yemen and millions of them you know that Friday when I came now from the trip a a cab driver took me home was talking with a very heavy accent Arab accent I was looking at him and we were talking the whole way we were talking we had a actually a very interesting conversation I told him I think you're Jewish I told him I think you should check your background I think you're Jewish no I'm a Muslim I told him I think you're Jewish I'm looking at your face I look how you talk I listen to how you talk you I think you're Jewish no no no I told him check check your background you know how many Muslims you know how many Muslims are Jewish you know how many stories of popping you know the story with that guy who the great-grandson of the Rish who came here toat with a song I want to tell the story it's a long story tell you another time there are millions of Muslims they not even Muslim the Jewish when the prophet said the ones who going to destroy you will come out from you you know how many terrorists from dis andala and Kamas they're Jews they just were born into a Jewish mother and they don't even know that you know how many stories are from the IDF when they go into AA there a from the last mission castled soldiers were going into a structure a woman came with a an explosive belt on her and one of the soldiers screamed Isel and she stopped herself and she started screaming no no no don't don't kill me I'm Jewish and they stopped her they took her to the Secret Service who interrogated her and she said please help me I have two boys there and I and and you know how many Jews are in the in in Arab countries Millions there is a organization in Israel it's called leava no is another organization they say there's about 60,000 Jewish women in Arab Villages and countries they were kidnapped whether willingly or not willingly and they live there and they can't get out once you're there you can get out and they have kids and they have kids and they have kids so there are millions and millions of Jews all over the world that they don't even know they're Jewish when mashia is going to come very soon you're going to see where we have a lot a lot of Jews all over the world you know how many Jews are in America that don't know the Jewish I have a very good friend that recently maybe some of you met him he was hanging out here in spat he recently found out that he's Jewish he went to Graves he saw all the graves are a star of David he now I'm Jewish I can't believe it I'm Jewish so the point is not to talk about about how many Jews are not Jews but mashia is going to come very soon and going to start pointing out to everybody who's Jewish and who's not Jewish and believe me there's going to be surprises a lot of people who think think they're Jewish and M is going to S very Sor to tell you you're not Jewish so the point to take from that is that we have to look back at our history history comes to teach me what I need to fix in the future that's why theim will usually fall close to because the comes to teach me about it shows and teaches about our history we need the history that's why schools teach history that's why we learn in our Torah history all our midashim is history because I need to see where my forefathers have sinned and made a mistake so I can correct it and if I cannot look back and correct what my previous generations did then I'm going to continue mourning and mourning and mourning every year if we're going to fast tomorrow and just be focusing on my Hunger I'm not doing any change and if I fast and I do not focus and why am I fasting because a building was destroyed I don't want to talk like that because it's very disrespectful for the beta mikdash but it's a piece of real estate it's a building that God destroyed one can come and say why are you crying we have the Torah we have synagogues we have yes I still learn T why are you crying because this is our home that we got from ourem this is our our Temple but taking that aside for one second I need to mourn and to cry for the destruction of the unity of my nation our nation is divided the entire nations around us are against us I mean there's a many many amazing people from the Gentiles that are are they're supporting us but look how much hate is around us the entire world is in chaos and I can think of a sandwich I need to think of what's going on in the universe the the universe is now in Exile and I'm suffering because I did actions me I mean I'm suffering because my father and my grandfather and my great-grandfather they did a certain action and if I don't know how to correct it then I will Fast another year and another year and another year and I will still cry and I will still complain that I don't have bet midash so the point is to look in the fast is not to think of how Ry I am or not to to to focus on what something that happened 2,000 years I need to focus on what's Happening Now not to focus on theam that was 2,000 years ago I need to focus on the sinam that is happening in 2017 that I can go to a community and not be accepted because they come from a different Community that's the problem the problem in our generation that we we're living in the past but we're not fixing the past it's very easy to commemorate yeah something happened 2,000 years ago and I'm not going to eat now for a whole day most people you ask them why you not eating why you fasting they don't even know why they're fasting they just say you know everybody told me not to eat so I'm going on a diet for one day which I'm sure that many people in the synagogue they don't eat they come home and they're looking around and nobody's going to notice I'm going to eat something the reason why we have a fast is not to torture us is the reason is that I will be a little bit uncomfortable we learned before about all the little things that I need to do to make me feel and realize that I'm uncomfortable to make me understand that I'm I'm should I should realize that I'm uncomfortable in this Exile even though I have food and a house and a wife and kids and I have money I should not feel comfortable I should feel very uncomfortable and if somebody else is suffering that should cause in me great pain to to see somebody else suffering everybody's suffering but we looking inside me and I'm no no no I have enough of my own problems I don't need to worry about somebody else's problems and the point is that Hashem puts a lot of problems in US CU he wants me to worry about somebody else's problems and I told you now that in the last two weeks in the trip we had morning lectures and night lectures and in between there was meetings and every person that came came to complain about all their problems some problems I'm telling you if you think you have problems come with me once on a turn you'll see you don't have problems what I had to hear from poor people not poor with money this this torture that people are going through literally I had to come with a box of tissues to every meeting is that hearing the hardship and everybody wants advice and my only advice that I could give besides the basic things is go and help somebody else yeah but Rabbi I have my own problems go and help somebody else because when you worried about somebody else's problems hasm is going to take care of your problems and that's the reality not too long ago we had an incident with a lady that unfortunately was in a very bad situation with her husband that caused her to leave the home in the middle of the night fearing for herself and the police had to get involved and it was a very very not nice scene and we were up with her till 4:00 in the morning she was in our home sleeping on the couch police was in our home threats from the husband there was a very not nice night and the next day in the morning when I was late to an appointment and I explained to the person that I was up all night then he told me it doesn't bother you that this lady comes to you in the middle of the night knocks on your door wakes up the house police is in your home doesn't bother you I told him you know it doesn't you know you know why cuz I rather deal with somebody else's problems I rather deal with somebody else's problems than dealing with my own problems and when I deal with somebody else's problems and has takes care of my problems so Hashem throws at us a lot of problems and we do what we do is we just complain we whine We complain has says you know why don't you go and help your neighbor and I'll take care of your problem so this originates from the same thing of if I can stand somebody else why would I help somebody else now it's very easy a lot of people come and say listen what are you talking about there's a lot of Charity going on a lot of charitable acts look how much organization of is out there and how much help and I'm like this is great but it's very easy to write a check especially when it's tax deductible and especially when I have my name written now on a wall that I donated and so money that's very easy go and do it without getting a receipt and without getting your name on a wall so you know now we're very soon going to open a new Sho and we're starting very soon a men's program that's going to be equal to the women but for men and we want to have a minan for that so I'm now in my trip I was collecting money to buy seph so it's not easy getting money especially for seph Tora that's a lot of money so okay people are you they give a few dollars here a few dollars a few dollars doesn't buy your seph T so seph is 60,000 not 50,000 so in dollars not shekels so unfortunately some people I mean fortunately because we're going to have a Tora but unfortunately some people give a seph because they want the name written in big letters that Mo Z gave money for the T which again I'm not saying anything wrong you still get the mitah of but the right way of doing it is you don't put your name everywhere but regardless to thatal not to talk bad about anybody some people if that's what causes them to be charitable good we'll put your name no problem there's nothing wrong with that even though the right way is to give the charity when your name is not flagged everywhere but the real charity is not to write a check especially when you have a lot of money the real charity is go and help somebody that is in need that's the real charity that's the real is that you go and help somebody without condition it doesn't matter who they are somebody's sick you think you think the ambulance driver the EMT comes to the person starts asking your know if you're I don't want to give you CPR right now CPA whatever it's called what yeah so the thing is that not to to you know in Hebrew they say is to put water in the blender and a blender doesn't blend water you can blend the water all day long it's not going to change if you put it in the blender this is an Israeli saying don't blend water so we don't need to blend water here the point is that we're standing in front of a very asici day the day that we have to fast for 24 hours we have to mourn but we also have to reflect and we have to understand why am I mourning what am I missing what do I need to learn from my past to change for the future and if I don't know how to change the the future then what good is the past for me the past is here to show me this is what you need to do and right now what we need to focus on the BET mdash was destroyed from that's it there's many other excuses I I heard all the version that no we fixed that and look how much love is between Jews and look how much organization of outreaches yes this is all amazing but when you go to the small communities or big Community doesn't matter but when you go to the hearts of people and when there's still the hate then we didn't change anything and I was a a in in a meeting by one person who comes from one group and I told him I'm sorry I got to get up from the meeting oh somebody passed away I met no they're announcing the the funeral somebody who passed away no no no when somebody maybe a very big Rabbi because I heard him say maybe a big Rabbi passed away they now that's how they announce the funeral but uh I was sitting in a meeting with somebody who's from one group that they're very proud about their their group their ethnic and I told them I got to finish the meeting I have a a lecture where are you going I told him to this community that's what I got and I said why I'll never do business with them okay I didn't ask you if you're going to do who you're doing business with why are you telling me no I I told him I don't want to know why and all he had to say is bad things about the the group now it wasn't a group like a a group of a religious group an ethnic group uh you know you have Persians you have Moroccans you have polish you have Romanians a group and I was like I I I that's what you have to tell me that's the you you can't keep it even if you you know what at least you don't you the good thing I can judge you for K is at least you don't hold it inside that you're taking it out but that's what's on your mind when I tell you about a group hundreds of thousands of individuals God-fearing Jews good Jews that's that's your opinion about them because one or two or 10 did bad to you now 100,000 is ostracized and then I went to the other group and they and I told them I just came from there so if we still have that all the charitable organizations that we have and all the soup kitchens and all the clothing organizations all that it's I can't say worthless but don't pull that and say here we have charity we have is we have unconditional love good but if deep down inside we're still battling this little hate for somebody else then we're still in a big problem now we cannot correct communities but I can correct myself and I need to look at myself do I really accept everybody equally do I judge another person by his color of his skin his FY he ashkenaz he wears his hat like this he wears his hat like that the jacket looks like this or his jacket looks like this or he says oi and I say oh and doesn't matter how I pronounce the the word and you know I'm I'm happy you're laughing but it's sad and and I now I'm telling you in this trip it was very focused very emphasized every Sho that I went to they were looking what's the Sid that I'm praying oh you pray from that to Door people like like looking like how I'm dressed how I pronounce my words beard the beard is no but and then I noticed when I was praying they're like What's the Sido that he's holding so we got to look in the past and we got to learn from the past how to change the future and a I can do it in a public way and by speaking about it and by emphasizing it I can affect the public but if I can't if it's not in my ability then I have to look inside myself how true am I am I'm one of these judgmental people oh no I'm good but that group I can't stand and I'm know I love all the people in the world but them they oh they're cheap and they're this and they they are thieves and they each group has a theme one group is cheap one group is singy one group is thieves and the problem is that mashiah is here and he's looking around and he says oh my gosh if mashia is then the they're not going to accept him if mashia is then the not going to accept him and if he's a then the not going to accept him he's like oh my God what what coat should I wear should I put my PE in the back or should I put the PE in the front Mia has an issue he's looking at the mirror every day he's like oh my gosh if I go with my hat like that then this group is not going to accept me maybe I'll go with my hat like this so we're causing problems to mashiach maybe he's suffering from bipolar schizophren I don't know what I am maybe I'm ashaz maybe of course I'm joking don't to make words literally mashia doesn't have bipolar I'm just trying to emphasize the problem is that we're we're walking with long beards and black hats and long dresses and we cover well you cover your here and we still we're we red doing everything in the book at least we're trying and many of us are trying we're not going to now measure how religious I am that doesn't care it doesn't matter but if I'm able to carry this point in me that that person is different I'm better than them he comes from that background you know now again I don't I don't want to blend water but in all these communities that I went to many parents came to me with complaints my daughter is dating uh so and so I don't want my daughter to date a marai a Persian say thank you that she's dating somebody normal and she's not dating somebody from her own gender you know that's you worry about because it's a different a different ethnic background no but they're all like this and like that say thank you that she wants to get married even a minute ago I was in a meeting that somebody was complaining that his son is dating his own gender now you complaining that your daughter is ding a marai right that's how that's how sad it is that people pretend that they're pass the judgmental part they they passed it they have the unconditional allow for any but I my daughter cannot marry him because he's coming from that ethnic group so the point is again not to to crush not to blend water too much is that when it comes to focusing on what I have to do tomorrow is really am I true to myself not how religious I am that is not the question not how much Tor I learn not much how strict I am with the mitv trust me in the eyes of hm that's not the highest priority the highest priority in the eyes of hem is how much you are making space for another person how much you are willing to accept another person even though they're different but really accept them and not to on the outside smile and yeah yeah you you you can sit here and in the inside I can't wait for him to leave so this is what we need to focus on so I know we're going to be very hungry and it's going to be hard not to focus on the sandwiches but you know what Hashem says listen don't think of yourself for 24 hours why why is it hard for me to fast you tell people tomorrow you got to fast people are like already oh my gosh oh my gosh how am I going to make it 24 hours without chocolate 24 hours without coffee people are freaking out you can you can think you know 70 years ago in the Holocaust people didn't eat for weeks they had a little little dirty water and and a and a crumb of bread and we crying on 124 hours we have a fridge all day long we're opening the fridge like some some weird creature all day long we're shoving things in our mouth 70 years ago people were starving and they would appreciate a cup of water so our perspective is completely distorted so 24 hours your mouth is not going to go like this all day long so it's for 24 hours that hasem tells me don't think of yourself and your stomach so long think of somebody else cuz when I'm thinking of myself I cannot think of somebody else so says oh I want you to stop thinking about yourself so you can start developing the ability to think of somebody else and if we start thinking of somebody else we actually come to the realization you know what I was now on the plane coming back there was a minan on the plane and you know what I liked seeing that was like the the Foreclosure of the trip all the trip what pinched my heart that there was oparation what finalized the trip was a minan on the plane this guy had the PS like that this guy had the PS like that this guy didn't even have P one guy had a white yamaka another guy had a blue yamaka we had we needed a minion oh now we're equal now in the sky when my feet are not on the ground suddenly we are equal suddenly everybody's the same so we we were able to make a minan on the plane and everybody was thanking each other this guy said the other guy said and we were shaking each other's hands and thanking each other for helping me be part of the minan and I was like oh that's when we forget about the facial design and the fashion and suddenly we were able to be a minan so the point is that what I want to f focus on is that I need to bring the Redemption and we want to see the coming of mashiah we want to celebrate the sacrifices in the m and it's around the corner by the way it's not that we're so that we light years away we can have it tomorrow with just a little bit of effort we're just so self-centered that we we we we shooting oursel in the leg so we have to take this 24 hours a day to really reflect am I really mourning the destruction of the temple or am I just going on a diet and am I mourning on the fact that a building got destroyed everyday buildings gets destroyed or am I dis mourning the fact that we as a nation and later on manifesting into the other nations that we didn't know how to run our business and as a result Hashem took our toy away so we have a lot of a lot of thinking to do in the next 24 hours I mean it's starting next tomorrow but we have a lot of thing of thinking to do and in between the starvation is to think can I get better can I accept another person more can I make space for another person can I not be judgmental cuz a person is in a different group now before we started this young lady having a hard time she came and spend Shabbat with us and she's torn I'm I'm I'm half breast live I'm half kabad I don't know what to do I like here and I like this and she's so so confused this Rabbi is telling her that that Rabbi is telling her this and it's sad I told her you're Jewish you want to you you you like the teachings of both groups good I also like the teachings of both groups it doesn't say that you're if you're kabad you can't learn breast and if you're breast you can't learn kabad and if they're telling you in the Institute where you are if you are in this group you couldn't learn that then all I can tell you is find a different Institute because there's nothing wrong with aik learning even though they will not do it and there's nothing wrong with the breast Li learning and from theab Dynasty there's nothing wrong with that why can't I learn from everybody in every that I was they told me you are in this group you can't learn that I was like I don't agree with that I don't agree with that I want to learn I've learned from all my teachers from everybody body so you see that this confusion and it should not be yeah 100% so the point is that we want to really know what we're reflecting on in the next past and it's in our hands to change the the this unfortunate hate towards other people and it's not only the hate between the Jews and between the group it's the hate between the Jews and the non-jews unfortunately in so many institutes the the education is to hate the Gentiles not to accept the Gentiles and they're our enemy and we we are the best and this is not the Torah the Torah says we have to be Al light to the Nations not to to fight with the Nations and if there's Nations that go against us then doesn't mean that we have to to like these particular people but the education that we see in many institutes religious Institute is to not to like not to like to hate and not to be part of the Gentiles which isn't all the complete opposite of the Torah so we have a lot of thinking to do and then we have a lot of actions to do it's not only thinking and the point is to really look at our past and to learn from the mistakes and to bring it into a point that what am I fixing just to fast and to wear sneakers that's not I'm not doing anything besides a diet and cleansing my body I didn't do nothing when my daughter told me can I play this game no can I do this no can I read that no she told me everything I can do I told her yeah you sit down and you think for 24 hours she said to it's boring I told her it doesn't matter if it's boring you have to think and even though you're only 12 years old you have to think is there any girl in your class you don't like is there any girl in your class that you think that doesn't like you it doesn't matter if you're 12 years old you also have have to think about that and yes it's boring we can't learn Torah we can't do anything we definitely can't eat hm says start using your brain that's what we need to do and BM if each and every one of us will take on themselves just to be a little bit more accepting and loving and making space to another person then hey I can guarantee to you that you'll be already going out of your own Exile 50% of your problems are going to be solved just by you accepting another person when I don't accept another person I create this negative energy that is now in me therefore I start suffering from physical problems from emotional problems because I hate another person the person doesn't get affected by that I get affected by that because I carry the hate that's it very simple it's a very bad name word hate my kids sometimes say I hate this don't don't say I hate say I don't like it's all my taste why you saying hate hate is a very bad word just having hate if I hate you you don't suffer from that Shalom I don't hate you I carry the hate so I have to get rid of that junk and if I carry hate I carry something negative in me I will become sick I will become depressed I will become angry and and and all these things because I'm carrying in me something negative very simple so we have to dig deep down into our Nish and to cleanse our Nish and to learn how to make space for everybody around us and to learn how to change that hate and you know a lot of people say listen I can't do much you're a rabbi you go speak in front of a lot of people you say that I can't do much which is the complete opposite of the truth you have family you have neighbors you have a community people around you you talk you you have to practice that not only preach practice it and by you accepting any other person and opening your home opening your Institute opening your heart you are also affecting the world you are affecting another person that says hey she she's different than me and she accepted me oh I can do that too has should guide us and light our way to be able to open our heart and make space to every human being to be able to De develop this un conditional love to any person and with that we'll Merit to see the coming of mashiah and if we do it tonight and tomorrow there's still a chance that no no if we practice the unconditional love not to fast if we practice the unconditional love tonight and tomorrow maybe we won't have to fast tomorrow and Mas will decide to surprise us and come so the fast is tomorrow don't get me wrong don't start fasting today the fast is tomorrow night tomorrow night starts the fast and we're going to fast throughout Tuesday today Sunday we still it's only what is it now it's only it's only 2:00 we still have 36 hours before the fast 36 hours we can win a war so 36 hours we can still change a lot and mashia is waiting to come come we just need to do a change