You Are Worth Fighting For | Rabbi Yoel Gold

It was the last week of high school. I was about to graduate from Adelphia Yeshiva. I was really excited to start the next chapter of my life, I was going to go to Passaic the next year, when suddenly, R’ Dovid Trenk, my Rebbi, walks into the Beis Medrash, sits down next to me, and he says, Yoeli, I want you to stay next year in Adelphia to help build the Beis Medrash. And my heart dropped. At that time, the Beis Medrash consisted of three guys. If I would stay, I'd be the fourth. Wasn't much of a Beis Medrash. And I said: Rebbi, you know I'm going to Passaic next year. I can't stay. He said: Yoeli, please. It's very hard to say no to Rabbi Trenk, so I told him: Rebbi, let me sleep on it. The next day, Rabbi Trenk comes back into the Beis Medrash and he says: Yoeli, get into the car. I said: Rebbi, where are we going? He says: I'll tell you on the way. I get into his station wagon and we start driving down Route 9. As we get onto the Staten Island Expressway, he said: Yoeli, I'm taking you to a Din Torah. I said: What? A Din Torah? He said: I'm taking you to R’ Shmuel Berenbaum, the זקן ראשי הישיבות. We're going to ask him if you should stay next year. Half an hour later, we pull up to R’ Shmuel’s house. R’ Shmuel invites us into his house, we sit down and Rabbi Trenk starts crying. And he says: Rebbi, Yoeli spent four years in Adelphia. I want him to stay another year to help build the Beis Medrash. Please tell him to stay. So R’ Shmuel turns to me. He puts his hand on my hand. He says: Nu, what do you say? With a quivering voice, I say: Rosh Yeshiva, I'm so grateful to Rabbi Trenk, I'm so grateful to Adelphia, but I feel it's time to move on. I'm going to learn better in Passaic. He says: You'll be able to learn better over there? Then go. I turn to Rabbi Trenk and I see Rabbi Trenk has a faint smile on his face. We get back into the car and we drive back. We didn't say another word. The next year I went to Passaic and periodically, every now and then, Rabbi Trenk would show up to the Beis Medrash in Passaic, walk right over to my seat, pick me up, give me the biggest hug, and he would say: Yoeli, I'm so proud of you. Twenty years later, I get a call from Rebbetzin Trenk, and she tells me the sad news that Rebbi had passed away. I flew from L.A. to Lakewood, and the entire time of the flight, I kept thinking, reviewing, reflecting on my relationship with Rebbi throughout the years. And suddenly, I remembered. I remember that episode, that incident, of Rebbi trying to get me to stay and I left, anyway. And I felt so guilty. After the Shivah, I called Rebbetzin Trenk and I said: Rebbetzin, Do you remember what happened 20 years ago? I feel like I owe Rebbi an apology. And she starts laughing and she says: Yoeli, You do not owe my husband an apology. He knew that it was time for you to go, he knew you have to leave, but he also wanted you to know how much he wanted you to stay, how much he valued you. Because as you go out into life and you face challenges, setbacks, and struggles, like everybody else, always remember that you are worth fighting for. It was like a light bulb went off in my head. I’m, like: Wow! I thought back to the past 20 years and I realized that subconsciously, any time I struggled with something, I kept fighting, because Rabbi Trenk put it into my nervous system that I’m worth fighting for. And today, I want to pass that message on to you, because it's true for everybody. You are also worth fighting for. Your Shmiras Einayim, your Ruchniyus, is worth fighting for. So it doesn't matter how many setbacks you have, how many challenges you face, how many times you fell, how many times you failed, a thousand, 10,000 times, it doesn't matter. Keep getting up. Keep fighting. Because like Rabbi Trenk says, You are worth fighting for.