Allergies of Kedushah | Rabbi Nachum Binder

The Mirrer Mashgiach, R’ Yeruchom Levovitz זכר צדיק וקדוש לברכה once had to be in the city of Vilna. And the home that he was staying was right across the street from a local gymnasium, a large school for teenagers, where hundreds of boys and girls would come and study their daily classes. And R’ Yeruchom was watching as the students came in every day, תערובת פריצות so not fine, so not moral. And R’ Yeruchom did a little research to find out what goes on in the gymnasium. And he was puzzled to hear that it's a very high-level place and it was known for having the brightest students. And R’ Yeruchom came back to Yeshiva and he said he was amazed. In such areas where there's so much distraction, there's so much Yetzer Hara, how are they able to focus on their studies? How are they able to come out with such high academics? And he said: Imagine if there would be boys and girls studying together in Yeshiva, none of us would be able to focus, none of us would be able to understand our learning. So why are they able to and we're not? And R’ Yeruchom said, I saw from this the Kedushah of Torah. The Kedushah of Torah cannot be סובל when there's anything that's not Kedushah involved in it. אין הכי נמי one's mind can be focused on his studies, one's mind can be focused on his business, even if there are other things on their mind. But Torah Hakedoshah, because of how holy it is, is allergic to things that are not Kadosh. מוריי ורבותיי Many of us find ourselves sometimes beating ourselves up. Why is it I can be davening, I can be learning, I can be in the middle of a Mitzvah, doing something right, and just then memories, flashes come to my mind, I remember things that I saw, I think about things that I shouldn't have thought about? Am I so low that even at these high moments this is what's on my mind? But R’ Yeruchom is telling us, It's not even while you're learning and even while you're davening. It's because the Kedushas Hatorah is so strong, because the Kedushah of our Tefillah, of our Mitzvos, of our Ruchniyusdiker Aliyah is so precious. Specifically, at those times, these things are going to bother us more. מוריי ורבותיי If we would remember this before we're in a Matzav of Nisayon, we would be able to realize, look in the mirror and say, I have Kedushah, I have Torah, I have Tefillah, I have Gemilus Chasodim, I have Mitzvos, and this, if I see something I'm not supposed to, my Kedushah is allergic to these things, we would be able to be Mechazek ourselves so much more in being careful and we would be able to be Mechazek ourselves with the realization of how Kadosh we really are. And with that realization, then we can strive to even becoming more Kadosh.