Vayera: Between Godly and Godless

and thank you for joining us. Why didn't you tell me it's your wife? We would have treated you so well, so respectfully. Why did you have to lie and say it's your sister? Says, "Cuz I came and I saw this is a place that's devoid of your devoid of it's a godless place and I was scared. What you going to do if you found out it's my wife that you would kill me in order to get to her?" Dr. Ashi, how did he know that it's a place that had so says a person comes year. A guest comes to the city, you ask him, "Do you need a place to eat? Do you need a place to sleep? Where are you from?" That's normal. You ask him, that's what you ask him. Who's who's the wife? Who's the woman? Who's that lady? That's the question you ask. You don't care if I eat, if I sleep, where I go, if I'm coming, if I'm going. None of those things are important to you. What is important to you is who's the woman? That's a place that has no. So, I heard from my rabbi, he asked, "That's that's your diagnosis of the place. It's a place without that." I I could think of a lot harsher terms to describe a place where they don't care if you eat or drink or anything. They just care who's the woman. That's all they have to know. It's it's a very immoral place. It's just not it's a lot more serious than a lack of. So he said that yes means that I'm aware at all times that there's something that there's a pressure on me that has a lot bigger than my immediate desires or wants or little petty petty vitinus. Yes means that I understand that I'm a slave and I work for a master at all times. He says there's people who see another person. Some people in the world look at that other person and say okay what could that person do for me? This person's coming my way now. What could they do for me? And other people say what can I do for them? That's called the means it's not just about me. I'm not just here to take. Earlier in the parame says yeah I'll I'll came that's why you hear if you came my way then there's something I have to do for you if you ended up over here I have to be mative to you I have to do something for you there's no exchange where I'm not doing something for you what do you need for me a place of is a place where they say what can we do for you a place that's devoid of your is a place that says okay but what you could what could you do for us I went to the very in Montreal his name is Rashz so he was explaining people say about somebody is a balite. He can keep a secret. That's a very nice compliment. But if you think about it, it sounds like a secret keeper is somebody who is mature or disciplined. He said, "No, no, it goes a lot deeper than that." He said, "A balsai is somebody who when you give him something." Why do people have a hard time keeping secrets? You gave me a secret. It's a really good hack because what's in it for me? If I could just drop it to one person, I'll have some kind of social capital, some kind of rush, some kind of ego boost that I know this, right? If I tell you they know it, maybe you'll respect me. So that means it's an inability to just do something for somebody else without taking anything. He says somebody who could keep a secret has the full ability to give themselves away to another person for nothing. I'm just here to serve you. So he says the of the of a secret keeper is the of somebody who has the right attitude towards relationships with other people. It's called a you look around the world people who have are usually good at keeping secrets. Also was being meal the difference between the people in that town and the way he viewed guest he said by you any you only ask what can you do for me come to me come to my home it's just about what can I do for you kachavas