Understanding TWiSTED thinking of struggling souls ☆ הבנת החשיבה במצבי משבר ☆ (HEB ST) (9287)

[music] >> Many times kids act in a certain way that people who don't understand kids off the derech, kids in pain, think for sure they're doing it l'chaches, to get us angry, to prove a point, to start a fight. Let's say that was true. How do you respond to that? By fighting with them? So then you just gave in to them. They're doing it to get you angry and you got angry. They won. Do you think you're going to win? You think you're going to say, "You chutzpeniac, how could you come and do such a thing?" And they're going to say, "Oh, oh, I'm so sorry. And now I love you despite that I'm going to put on the yarmulke. I'm going to dress tznius." There was a a a kip, a girl in Eretz Yisrael who was off the derech, who went through tremendous pain. We're talking about unfortunately rape, rachmana litzlan. She went through tremendous pain. Her parents are are being mekarev her by a voice of ahava, using our method. And they went to Eretz Yisrael. And she went to a kever to daven for the first time in six, seven, eight years. She's not not dressed tzniusdik. So somebody's there and he has to defend Hashem and he starts screaming, "What are you doing coming into a place like this? You should know better. This is a holy place. Get out." What is What What is he thinking? What are people thinking? But what are you thinking when you don't do all of that, but you just go and you give that look. What are you thinking? What are you thinking when you go you whisper? You think that that the blind, deaf, and stupid? What would the Baal Shem Tov do? What would the Chazon Ish do? What Pick your tzaddik. What would they do? Al tadineni chavercha, don't judge, don't look down, embrace, love, smile, Say, "Hey, how are you?" Is it so hard to be nice? Is that not a fundamental Jewish concept? And the firmer you are, the more nasty you are? The more you can be marachek somebody the way you people throw neshamos, flee. Garbage. That's the hat that's on your head, the beard, what does it to you? Where does it come from? Show me one godol that says that. Our job is to be mekarev. But if you can't be mekarev, navoch for you. Zera Kodesh says you get the most beautiful blessings. You can't do it, I feel so bad for you. But to be marachek? You feel better when you when you when you do that? And get out of the shul, get out of the thing, bu bu bu bu bu bu fighting brimstone all of that defending Hashem. That's not that's not the derech haTairah. You're off the derech. You're also off the rocker. You're off your rocker. You're meshuga. You're selfish. You're you're you're just angry. Not how to treat a person that way. You have to be a mensch. How many stories of gedolim are there? Gedolim don't act that way. Katanim, katanim, such small-minded people. And they do it in the name of Hashem. No, no, no, if they were a Yankee fan, they would do it in I got to beat up the Red Sox guy because they hate each other. And if and whatever whatever small-minded angry people. Politics, they'll kill the other guy and fight the other guy. Get out of here, bu bu bu bu bu. Tairah, you're taking Tairah of Hashem and you're using it as a baseball bat in the name of Hashem. Get out of here. Who are you to tell another Yid to get out? How do you know that Hashem wants your tfilah more than that person's tfilah? What do we say on Yom Kippur? We can't even be mispallel without the avaryonim, without the sinners. need them. And I don't even consider these the sinners that you're talking about. Could be you, my friend with the big black hat. You're the sinner that we have to wait for. Being mevaiesh somebody berabim. You don't have any halacha that tells you that you're not allowed to give mussar that way. You're not allowed to give tochacha that way. You're not allowed to embarrass someone. You're not allowed to reject someone. Where were you raised? Where Where What is this? Is it called kana'us? This is a kanoy? The Satmar Rebbe was a kanoy. He would treat someone like this? Never. Never. He told a father, I have so many stories, many stories. He told fathers, what You have to be mekariv your your child more than your other children. He said, I'll give you an example. Whatever money you give Chanukah gelt, let's say you give $100 each one, in those days probably 10,000 each one, give him double. He needs to know that you love him. Never reject. Never reject. What, you don't have a You know anything about halacha? Rebbe Yoman Eisenberger quoted his Rebbe. I mean, you have to understand what tzaddikim look at it. He said, it's very, very, very difficult to hate. There's a lot of halachas like shisnus acherim, you're not allowed to be mevaiesh somebody berabim. You mevaiesh this person, you know what happens? Do you Do you understand this religion? You get all their aveiros and they get all your mitzvos. You really want to give them all of your I'm sorry. You You get all their aveiros and they get all of them. Yeah. You really want that? And you think, "Ooh, I'm so happy." You just ching-ching, you just donated a million dollars into their account. Can you imagine? Let Let's call it financial. If you mevaiesh a yid berabim. Any Jew. You don't know this story. You don't know if they're anusim. You don't know if they're sheigetzim. You don't know if they're chilonim. You don't know. You're taking a risk. All the money in your bank account goes to them and all of their debt goes to you. Would you do it? Uh not so fast. The name of a shammy maraca neshama. How how could you atone for such a sin? If you did it in yourself and you said you went over to this lady and you said I am a sick person. I don't represent Torah. I'm a sick person that I have to yell at people who aren't fit to live the way that I want to live. So please get out of here, but I'm not doing it in the name of Hashem, okay? But you're representing God. You can't release them. Wait, who did that? Show me one story, authentic story that somebody was asked to to to to leave the premises because they weren't sneezed thick enough. And that's the way to treat a human being. This girl she didn't have an 80 years. She went her parent was in Arizona with her. So she decided to go to open her heart to Hashem. Hashem, why did you let this this this animal to be there to to reject her? What avera did this person do that avera avera that should bring such an avera that he should do this to this girl? She she was just beginning a journey. You know, we have kids who finally go and they they feel so cleansed and so pure and so holy. They say it's the first time I connected to Hashem and they start to daven and they start to be interested in Yiddishkeit and and and who knows what damage was done? First interaction, get out of here. Prutza, calling her names. Where were you born? Where were you brought up? What religion do you subscribe to? Cuz I have a collection of about 5,000 stories of authentic and none of them did that. Not this, not this, not this, nobody. So sad to think that there are people still alive today in this day that think that they're going to be another Jew. And I feel bad for them because when it comes to Kippur it says in the holy room that you are judged the way that you judge other people. And and if you're judging people in a tough way instead of saying being them probably she was hurt probably she was no better. Let me be for No, if you're fire and brimstone, that's the way you are judged. That's what it says in the and in the room. >> [sighs] >> Show if you take the car. The way that you're judged on and Kippur is given over to you. The show to all the people make sure to judge the nation other people with it. With righteousness. Says the lady doesn't mean righteousness means even right the way it's supposed to be properly. Which also you're not doing cuz you you're not thinking about all of her pain that she went through and all of there you don't know their journey. So it's anyway not only could do that. But he said means that. Make sure when you judge other people you're charitable. You look at them with a a good eye because that's the way your judgment is going to be on and Kippur. I feel so bad for this guy. The value of somebody them. Hurt he should hurt. Stab he took out a knife and he stabbed her. Her her to to be her in the name of I don't know what he calls it. It's not our religion. And I feel bad for him that he gave her or gave away all of his mitzvahs and took all of her aveiros. And that he's going to be judged on Rosh Hashanah and Yom Kippur mamish so so so intensely. And he has all those extra aveiros and no mitzvahs. Why would anybody feel that that's the right thing to do? Why can't you be a mensch? You want to look away in a aidel way, you could look away if you're so holy. Probably not so holy to do such an aveira. Wow, wow, we have to be so careful. We have to be so so so careful. That Hashem should help us that we should be mekariv and not merachek. We should judge people favorably, lifnei mishuras hadin, sedaka, chesed, rachamim. [music] Hashem will judge us with all of those traits as well.