The Incredible Last Letter of Rav Friedlander (Rosh Hashana)

Reb Chaim Friedlander was a very famous mashgiach. He has this farm, Sifsei Chaim, which are a best-seller. The sichot that he gave all over Eretz Yisrael, he was also in England for a certain amount of time, is well-known. For anybody who's somewhat connected to the Yeshiva world, realizes what a great man this person is. And I want to read to you a letter of his that he sent to his bachurim in Ponevezh on the last Rosh Hashanah before he passed away. He passed away in 1986, so this is in tough You would so this is in 1985 in tough shin mem hey, when he went ahead and sent a letter to them in chof gimmel Elul. That's what it's That's the heading on the letter. And he said, "Since I can't" He basically told the bachurim that he wishes them a bracha and a good year, "and I can't be there. I have to speak to you from a distance, and it's very painful for me that I have to do it from a distance." He was basically riddled lo aleinu v'lo aleichem chas v'shalom with cancer. The doctors gave him a full-fledged prognosis that nothing's happening, you're not going anywhere, and there's no way and there's no no future in mind. But at the same time, k'movan, he had a tremendous amount of hope, and he realized this Rosh Hashanah was, as they say, very gorali. So let me write to read to you a couple things that this incredible mashgiach, this incredible talmid of Reb Dessler, yeah, he was a talmid of Reb Dessler, writes. He brings the famous Gemara in Rosh Hashanah daf tes zayin, which is relevant for this year, which says, "Kol shanah she rosha b'tchilasah tamimas she b'soifah." If a If in the beginning of the year there's no blowing of the shofar, so people are are lacking from making them from humbling themselves from Hakadosh Baruchu, so then it could be a dangerous year. As opposed to when people are humbling themselves, they make themselves rash, k'viyachol, like a poor person in front of Hakadosh Baruchu, so then so if she yesh acharis, so then afterwards it will be a promising year. It will be a year with a tremendous amount of promise that things will go well. That's how Rashi explains the Gamara Takhnuneen Yidaber Rosh. A person who feels rash, who feels um you know, lack of money or poor person or doesn't feel in control, he will beg Hakadosh Baruchu, he will have and over here he writes incredible words. Says Rav Chaim Friedlander, I understand that in general that whenever we start a year l'fi chot b'eilu sheb'ameit kol tzorchei she shanah gedolah she whenever we're starting a new year, it's hard for understand the concept of starting anew. What do I mean by starting anew? I'm going to start asking Hashem for a parnassah, for a job. I have a job. I'm going to ask Hashem for a good wife. I have a good wife. Amen. Hakadosh Baruchu may ask you for a family, for a house, for health. I have them. What does it mean to ask him for a new? I can ask him to keep things status quo or things could always get better as we're familiar. I can ask that. But the idea that the Gamara says here is it's being mechadesh, it's coming to bring out a new thing so something anew. And he asks, how can it be? So he says an incredible thing. He says it's actually extremely hard to do it when a person is wealthy. A person is full of money and has everything. What is he going to ask for? To give me money? I already have the money. But we all know the truth that on Rosh Hashanah Hakadosh Baruchu makes a din, a psak not on the whole year, but every day of the whole year. Every day this Monday you're going to have this, Tuesday is this. Just because you had something yesterday doesn't mean you're going to have it today. Cuz everything you have presently at this moment is because Hashem wants you to have it at this moment. It's not because you had it you got the job a year ago or because the guy because your heart was beating the other day. Hashem gives us a beautiful reminder of this because if you ever noticed the only organ that you could feel, internal organ that you could feel constantly pumping is your pulse. It's your heartbeat. And what's the reason why Hashem does things like that? Cuz he's coming to remind you on a consistent basis. It's another present. Every second is another present that Hakadosh Baruch Hu is giving you. It's another reminder that it's to me that giving that's giving you the breath of life, the gift of life. It's me giving it to and just because you had it a half an hour ago, that's not why you have it right now. It's because I'm giving it to you right now. That's the difference. You understand? Says Rav Chaim Friedlander in this beautiful letter, he basically says that a person who is wealthy, it's very hard for him to understand this concept. Because I already have the money. Why am I going to beg you for money? You can always beg for more money. Everyone's always asking for more money. That's not all that's all what we're discussing. The fact that I should have a stable career, the fact that I should have every stability in my health, etc., etc. If I have it, it's very difficult to give that type of appreciation or more that type of realization. It's difficult for us to give such a realization because I already have it. And I usually understand I have it now because I had it before or because I got the job. However, says Rav Chaim Friedlander, and here's where the very sensitive part comes. When someone is a rash, when someone doesn't have any money or when someone only lost all his money, it's much easier for him to go into the Rosh Hashanah begging Hakadosh Baruch Hu and saying, "I know it's all in your hands. I know that if I'm going to get the I'm going to get some money in my bank account, if I'm going to get out of this debt, I know it's up to you. I realize that it's coming from one address and one address only. Veniska Hashem levadei. I realize that you are the only ktavet to do it because it has nothing to do with my past. Here, look, right now it's not there." Said Rav Chaim Friedlander and Chaim Oden, "When someone's in a very sickly situation, when someone is not doing so well," says Rav Chaim, "all the other previous years, I had an I had a more difficult time in getting connected to Rosh Hashanah. With all the sichot and these shmoozim, and one of the biggest mashgichim that we have walking in Eretz Yisrael. But in the end of the day, we all know when a person is feeling healthy and good, it's hard to beg for health, or beg for briut, or beg for a long or beg for a full year. Because we're usually just assuming, I'm good. I'm healthy. I just went to the doctor. He gave me a full checkup. I'm doing well. Baruch Hashem, no no high pulse, no you know Baruch Hashem my my my blood pressure's doing pretty well. >> [gasps] [clears throat] >> But when a person is in the situation says Rav Chaim that I am in right now, I love it. I'm so happy. What a satisfaction. I'm living Rosh Hashanah. This is going to be a real Rosh Hashanah of kol shana shurasha betchilatoh. That that I'm poor in the beginning because I realize now based on my situation that I'm completely dependent on Einan No Vadri, on only Hakadosh Baruch Hu, on only the one that can go ahead and do anything for me. I don't take anything for granted. I just appreciate every second of life. He said I came out michaim mimaves l'chaim. I almost died and Baruch Hashem Hashem did me a tremendous miracle and I came out. And you should know, yes, he died that year, but towards the end of the year, right at the end of Tammuz. Meaning he lived out almost till the next Rosh Hashanah miraculously. Cuz the doctors basically gave him prognosis that there's no nothing doing here. You This old body Rachmana litzlan was in a very bad situation. And still he says that Hakadosh Baruch Hu gives me the capability. He gave me a matana that I can go ahead and spend this Rosh Hashanah realizing that it's only from him. And really realizing, not just saying it over in a shmooze, not just listening in a shiur on Torah Anytime, but really living it, realizing it, and making it part of myself. And this is really the essence of the day. And this is what he That's what he says, Baruch Hashem yesh li hisdamnut kazot l'hargish she'ani kula talui b'yad Hakadosh Baruch Hu. Hashem itziletanu mamash mimaves l'chaim. Bishvil layatzir chai. Now I get to live it chai, he says because I get to actually feel it not just speak it out. And of course he there's a big of course we know that he understood it but now I get he says I get to feel it. Right? Now he that feeling healthy, fit, eternal he sees that life is temporary and now he's able to really appreciate this on a different length that he's ever been there before. We all know the call to call when it says when it says call cuz I'll I'll call shima v'nishima on every breath I take and every breath that I'm able to go ahead and get out to deserves another it's going to be OCD you can't make a on every time you breathe in another piece of oxygen we understand that but at least you have to know the direction. Everything is only a there is nothing else. These are all our prayers on but I'm going and saying you should be the you should only be we're always going ahead and mentioning the idea we're always saying the term you are the one all of the of to be a sham. The whole idea of screaming out everything that we do the whole idea of all the that we do on of and being is this message that Freeland was teaching us on his last days to tell us the idea and that yes it's hard for us to really realize it because in the end of the day I have it already. So what are you saying I'm getting it or he's going to give it to me this year but the answer is every day is a different sack. If he said if he said and oh you're going to have it not necessarily or not on the fourth on the Wednesday in the middle of Kislev are you necessarily going to have what you had on Tuesday? Because every day is its own individual something to realize and something to savor up in order to to get a full understanding into this uh this concept. I'm going to mention one last thing, and that's the Ponevezher Rov. Listen to what the Ponevezher Rov said when he was giving his introduction to Slichot. Now, again, let me tell you who the Ponevezher Rov was. The Ponevezher Rov, incredibly, they found the papers. I just They just brought it down here in the Yad They found the papers that are 85 years old. 20 years he was working in Ponevezh in Lithuania to try to put together the Yeshiva, a school, a Cheder. He worked hard in getting papers, going with the government back and forth. He was sweating bullets in order to be able to get the auspices to be able to make a Makom of Torah. There were some 10,000 Jews there at the time, and he wanted to make it that they should all be able to have a place that they can learn. He had a Kolel. It took him 20 years, 1937. Listen to this. 1937, he was able to get it all done. He did it. He became the Rov of the town. He had a Yeshiva with 600 Bochurim. 600 Bochurim, almost unheard of, right? 600 Bochurim back then, I'm saying. In Europe, you got But did you hear the date I just said? 1937. Guess what? Four years later, 1941, the Nazis conquered that place at Ponevezh in Lithuania, and they killed everyone. Wiped it out clean. Everybody was was gone. Every little remnant that was around is not anymore. The Ponevezher Rov happened to be in Chutz La'aretz at the time, and he was spared. Baruch Hashem, Kadosh Baruch Hu spared him. Before Slichot, stood up the Ponevezher Rov, and you know what he said? He He "Rebbotai, I want to tell you something. I lost my whole entire family in Ponevezh. I lost all my dreams and auspices, everything that I tried to do. My all my shifuts, everything that I was trying to build and I worked over and over again in order to build, it's all gone. But Baruch Hashem, you know what? Hashem did me a favor. He did me an incredible tovah. He brought me here to Eretz Yisrael, to Bnei Brak, and I sweat and everyone knows the Ponevezher Rav picked himself up. He didn't pick her, he didn't complain, and he went everything all over again. All over again. He probably had a lot of experience, but he was able to go ahead and rebuild all of Bnei Brak. Bnei Brak is under him in the Chazon Ish. That's it. He didn't just build Yeshivas Ponevezh, by the way. Just so you know, he had he even built an old age home, a hospital. He built Chadorim school. He had a tremendous amount of mosdot that were under his auspices. Says the Ponevezher Rav an incredible thing, until I saw this I was actually mesmerized. He said, "You know I did that because I went to Chutz Ha'aretz had to travel all over the place. I went house to house, della to della to knocking from door to door to door. And he says, "I can't tell you what busha there was. It was embarrassing. You have no idea how many times when I knocked in the door I begged that nobody would answer." I knocked and I said, "I it's just too embarrassing for him to do this." He wasn't a young chappie, he was in his 50s. And he said it just wasn't something that I was I had and it was very enjoyable to do, but I knew that I had to do it as a shaliach shaliach tzibbur, and he went and knocking. Had a bushut ponim. Bushut ponim. It was embarrassing to do it and went [music] to the And then he said, "I thought to myself, why am I embarrassed? Because I'm going and taking money that doesn't belong to me. K'v'yachol, it belongs to someone else and he's giving to me. I'm coming in as they say, mooching off of someone else. I'm trying to get. If I was going and knocking at the door and telling him, 'You owe me rent for the house you're in. You're in my house, you have to pay me rent.' Or if I had lent the guy money and I'm knocking at the door to say, 'You listen, buddy, you're overdue. You need to pay me back." Would I be embarrassed? On the contrary, I would knock and knock and tell you, "Hey, bud, you better go ahead and pay me back. What's wrong with you? You're late, right?" I would have no embarrassment at all. I would be the ball of boss here. I would be in charge. The only reason why I'm embarrassed is because I know it's not my money and I'm going and asking for handouts for for to do me a to do me a favor and give it to me. Says the Lubavitcher Rebbe, "That's shot in what we say all the time on Rosh Hashanah, "L'cha Hashem tzedaka v'lanu boshet panim." "L'cha Hashem tzedaka v'lanu boshet panim." The same is taught by Rav Chaim Friedlander. I realize that it's all from you, Hashem, and now I understand why I could have boshet panim, why I'm embarrassed. He says, "Why do we say these words if we're not embarrassed?" How often do YOU SAY "L'CHA HASHEM TZEDAKA v'lanu boshet panim" and you're not embarrassed of Hashem? Come on, let's be honest. You're not embarrassed. You know why he says? He says because you think that "Does it come to me? It belongs to me. It's mine anyways. The the fact that I'm alive right now belongs to me. I've been alive before. Why shouldn't I be alive right now? I have money, so what's the difference? Why do I have to go ahead and be embarrassed about the fact that I'm asking Hakadosh Baruchu for money? I'm just asking for WHAT I ALREADY HAVE." I HAVE a family. I have kids. I have health. I have shidduchim. Everything's going great for me, Baruch Hashem. So, why do I have to ask for it? "V'lanu boshet panim." Okay, I'm just asking Hakadosh Baruchu don't interfere too much. Don't mess things up and just keep the keep status quo. Say, "Hey, do me a favor." That's the pasuk that the Lubavitcher Rebbe said. He said that's pshat in the pasuk. So, when I was knocking at that door, it wasn't mine. So, I had boshet panim and that's what we need to do on Rosh Hashanah. It's not yours. Because you had it yesterday, doesn't mean that you're going to have it tomorrow. Just because something was before, that chazaka that you had before is not there before. When you appreciate that, it sounds maybe negative? No, because then you appreciate everything that you have. You want real appreciation. You want real success on Rosh Hashanah. You want to show that to give you a positive side in, then listen to the words of the Ponovezher Rav and Reb Chaim Freilander on his last days. Realize where it's coming from and you'll be so satisfied because you'll never get angry again. We all get angry, I know I get angry. I realize that. But if we would be living the statement I'm saying right now, you would never get angry again because it's all from Hakadosh Baruch Hu anyways. Everything's a matana. Every second of life, every breath that I have here is something special is something that Hakadosh Baruch Hu gave me. Why should I not be appreciating that I have it? If I give you a million dollars, but I give it to you in one dollar bills and they're all crumpled up and I give it to you hard, stick it in your You're going to complain? Are you joking? Thank you very much, sir. I appreciate it. I'll take it any way you want to give it to me. Check Check Cash or credit card. I have no problem. You're willing to take anything you can. If you're receiving hand-me-outs, if Hakadosh Baruch Hu is handing out on Rosh Hashanah the lot of bites of a day and you should have a little bit And we together should all have a little bit of embarrassment on that matter, then you'll be living a life of bliss, a life of happiness because now I know that everything I have I'm living because Hakadosh Baruch Hu gave it to me. It's not just because I deserve I deserve it. It's not just because I had it and therefore I get upset because people are taking it away from me. I have it because Hakadosh Baruch Hu gave it to me. And when a person receives something, he's happy with whatever he receives. No more upon him. That's being mamlich Hashem. Let's appreciate Hakadosh Baruch Hu. Venizke Hashem levado. Al pi this Rosh Hashanah will be the Rosh Hashanah that we will see the Geulah bimheira v'yameinu, amen.