Transcript
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was a a muscle of the sun and the wind.
The sun and the wind were arguing with
each other which one was stronger. Is
the sun stronger more powerful or is the
wind stronger and more powerful? And
each one attempted to prove how I'm more
super, I'm more, you know, more harsh
and more dangerous. I can do more damage
than you.
But neither one of them emerged
victorious in this machlocas because
really they could both be equally
destructive. The sun could be terrible
and the wind could be terrible, right?
But finally they agreed it's a muscle.
So
>> What do you mean they agreed? The sun
doesn't talk.
>> [snorts]
>> Anyways, they agreed
that whichever one can There was a
traveler walking. Whichever one could
take this traveler
and force him to take off his coat,
that's going to be the winner. He's
going to be declared you're more
powerful. This is the sun and the wind.
Okay. So the wind's like I'll go first.
Okay. So it starts to blow at this poor
traveler who had no idea what was
coming. He's like minding his own
business, you know, listening to
acapella or whatever.
And all of a sudden the wind starts
coming and it's getting stronger and
stronger. So what does he do? He takes
his coat and he wraps it even tighter
because it's getting, you know, very
windy.
And it's getting more windy. He takes it
more firm.
And the more fiercely the wind blew, the
more he pushed. The more he pushed, so
the more the
the traveler walking clung onto his
coat. Finally the wind gave up in
defeat. He's like I got I can't do this.
Forget it.
Okay. The sun now began to shine. And
he's like okay, now it's my turn. So
what do he do? He shine a little bit.
He'll be warm.
Beat down on the traveler.
And then
as like, you know, it starts getting a
little bit hot, he starts, you know, let
let's go of the grip on his coat.
And soon like starts getting like beads
of of sweat and different things coming
down his face and he's like whoo, okay,
it's getting very hot. And the sun keeps
going very calmly, you know, just like
opening up this ray and that ray. Like
very soft, not like an attack. Just like
soft.
>> [snorts]
>> Until of course the traveler yielded and
uh gave up gave up this coat to the
beautiful warmth
of the afternoon sun and he removed his
coat.
What's the moral of the story? What's
the muscle? What's the nimshal?
The nimshal is that fierce words of
rebuke cannot accomplish cannot
a few well-chosen gentle warm words of
encouragement.
What what what those words of
encouragement can do fierce rebuke
cannot.
So a lot of times we have a goal in
life. We have a mission. I want to teach
you this lesson.
How do you do it? One.
Two. Right? That's one way to do it,
right? Another way to do it is very
calmly and it's not always easy to be
calm, but it's just the idea to think
about just to to keep another person's
feelings
just on your radar. You know what I'm
saying? Keep it on your radar.
Other ways to do it. So that's the idea
over here. The idea over here with the
reason why Moshe Rabbeinu over here is
speaking about in this pasuk zayin
speaking about the beauty of the judges
is because before you give rebuke just
make sure you're doing it correctly. And
if you're a person who constantly finds
himself rebuking so then learn learn
like just like in Shmiras Halashon you
have to learn tehillus, right? If you're
a shatz and if you're talking about
people or whatever the case is, you have
to know the rules of tehillus. So too if
you're somebody who has to rebuke if
you're a dean, if you're the mashgiach,
if you're whatever it is so you have to
you have to know how to do it.
And I think it's a beautiful thing cuz
there's nothing wrong with tochacha.
There's nothing wrong with it. It's
great. Tochacha is amazing because
you're able to grow and you're able to
steig and you're able to change your
path. Like I really didn't know that. I
didn't I didn't I never knew that. So
now I know I want to be better. So I
want to do this. I want to do that etc.
But it has to come to me in a way that
I'm willing to accept it.
So before you rebuke your spouse
cuz you're doing it anyways, right? Know
how to do it. Know how to do it. Think
about it. And also the same thing slow.
Go slow. Be patient. Think before you
speak cuz a lot can change.
