Time to Get Out of Your Head & Get Into Life

cavaldo [Music] that's beautiful [Music] yeah on sucker [Music] tomorrow foreign morning welcome back everybody or I should tell myself welcome back all right [Music] come on again and get one again he holds up this place I'm telling them that you hold up this place the Halsted of the art okay good morning everybody and if you don't have the text here the papers I want to thank rep David and Kaplan Father and Son for these beautiful copies so this new discourse that we will be exploring is really a very very emotional it's very moving especially the second half it deals with one of the most or maybe the most painful subject in life which is really not a subject and that's you know the suffering the inner world of suffering it's really a journey into the inner world of suffering from the Soul's perspective I learned this a few years ago myself I learned it and I it was very good that sounds like me and I was very taken by it but recently I learned it like a week or two ago I learned it then I really I just at some point I just started to cry especially as I said the second half it's a very uh very moving and very powerful mimer essay discourse okay now just about the copies this is a minor a discourse from a safer known as Derek mitsvilla this was written by the time was the grandson of the balatanya the son of his daughter layer and the third Rebel Chabad he succeeded his uncle and father-in-law the mittler he wrote a safer called what is it he called it actually time he goes through many of the 630 meters in the Torah but explains them from the spiritual emotional and psychological perspective in that sense it's an extraordinary work because he'll start off with the Mitzvah the way it's described in halachic Works usually the safer which is an encyclopedic Masterwork of all the 630 mitzvahs and then we'll delve into this particular Mitzvah from a spiritual perspective and he goes through many of the mitzvahs this one that we chose is actually on this week's power supply and it deals with a very very difficult mitzvah till today I get quite a few letters from people from time to time trying to make sense of this because it's it's hard to understand as you could see in the headline is the prohibition against the Cayenne who has disabilities or physical deformities or blemishes to serve in the basement or in the mishkan and even to go into the Heckle to the inner sanctum of the basamiktus that was reserved only for kayanam who did Aveda that's the place where the menorah was where the Candelabra was the kind would go until item was there they had the show bread over there the inner altar was there they would burn the incense every morning and evening morning and afternoon it was the roofed roof part of the Michigan and it was an entry for everybody there were the parts in the courtyard known as the Azara that every other people can go in Temple Mount everybody could go in but then there was the inner part of the base before the holy of holies right before the Kardashian this is what the Smiths was discussing and it comes in Paris he said parishes Emma it's an order of the purchase which that's how they say foreign but doesn't say what are the 630 meters and how much it doesn't say Mitzvah one Mitzvah two Mitzvah three there's just a list of Mitzvahs in different parishes it doesn't even say in Hamish how many Mitzvahs there are people don't realize that the gemara masakis Marcus says we have a tradition to 650 it doesn't say which ones the great sages had a tremendous work to do you take a Hamish and figure out what are the 630 missions for example every time it says you should keep hashem's Mitzvahs that's not one of the 650 Mitzvahs that's called the Mitzvah clawless it's everything so you have to figure out we know there's 248 positive 365 negative so it's not such a simple thing the Ramba made a safe ramiz he did a list the ramban wrote a book with a commentary on say from mitzvah's arguing with a lot of them and has his lists you had before you had what's known as the Bahamas is a safer that was printed by one of the Spanish Sages they're really very early on the 12th century the 13th century but we don't know the author he wrote a safe he didn't write who he is so the assumption is his name was of Aaron halavi from Barcelona from Spain but it's also not clear because it's not so it's not decisive so he wrote an encyclopedia very clear based on the parishes of Mitzvah and it's a beautiful work because he tells you the Mitzvah he tells you the basic details of the mitzra and he tells you the reason for the Mitzvah or at least the reason the way he presents it which is one of the reasons for the mitzvah so he follows that order and he quotes then he goes to the next layer parcious emmer Shalom is a balm and what's the definition of physical blemishes in his body deformities blemishes he wasn't allowed to go into the to the sanctuary or to the place to serve by The Altar Leviticus 21 23. you can't go into the paragas which means the room where they had the curtain separating the sanctuary from the holy of holies nor should he get close to the altar to serve like the other name the outer altar this is even in the courtyard where they did the service of the sacrifices because of the blemish in him foreign there's also another two prohibitions about him working whether he has means a permanent blemish either it may be passing and when it's gone he's back in but while the blemish is there while the moon was there there's a mum kavua means it's a permanent issue over means it's a passing issue it could be cured it could be a remedy both of them is a Prohibition that he shouldn't serve he shouldn't do that foreign always looks for the root of the Mitzvah he writes he says something which is a very practical but also disturbing it's difficult says I'm using my own words it's not a pro the real question is what did he do what did this man do he was born a certain way or something happened to him on injury or the deformity in his body you're penalizing him that he can't do that void in the basement like all the other it's a very painful thing and on today's society there's a special attempt they call it inclusivity right we even have a law that was created a few years ago that every building needs to have accessibility to people who have physical disabilities a parking lot right as a special place you build a ramp so people can use a wheelchair they can't use steps Etc and we understand why it's not their fault that they were born a certain way or that they experienced or experiencing a difficulty of Challenge on the contrary you want to be sensitive so at first glance this Mitzvah seems like oh you have a moment you can't you can you can you can you can do that right all the other coinum could his brother could his father could his second brother could and he can't and that's amits of impartius Emma this is what this was coming to address here in this moment this discourse is not just going to be he'll be discussing this Mitzvah he'll be discussing this entire experience that this person has to deal with in life what other people don't deal with ah a mom says a whole other issue yeah imams is a similar issue and a different level there's no physical deformity but a mom said did nothing wrong Mommy and Tati were engaged in an adulterous relationship right so Asia's fish a woman was married and she has a relationship with somebody else and a baby is born and she was never a divorce the baby is a mom's what's his fault it's not his fault he's an innocent boy there's Apostle King kyalis a Kim I have seen the cries of those who were deprived and they have no common they have no comforter so the medrish says that referring to Hashem is saying this is my fault and he's talking about the moms I've seen the cries of those who were deprived and nobody can come for them it's my fault I'm the one who made the law about Asia so it's my fault that he's a mama so he says ultimately I'm the only one who has the Comfort who's gonna has to come for the moms and it's a unbelievable Madras yeah so that's a similar form where a person goes into a situation yeah and has this title yeah and we know what Mama right this mom's in halach and then there's moms are the way it became part of the Jewish lexicon you know when you really like somebody you have a good title for him yeah the truth is the gamara says the word is right it's also a form of a blemish a different type of blemish so this is what we're going to be addressing it's a very it's a deep Journey it's an emotional Journey this moment first is a long introduction and in the second half he gets back to this Indian so they say which explains things basically from a more practical I would say Earthly perspective what you would say Alpena the more revealed concrete part of title says it explains it's not about him it's about us he says it's about us and this point is that people and I guess we can add the word unfortunately people have a hard time looking at things that are not pleasing to their eye that's what it is and he says the Toyota wanted that we should look at those who are doing that void in the basement we should eagerly look at them and gaze at them and pursue them and be engaged by them foreign which I should say keep leaves us wanting because it's like so let the Titus say you know grow up grow up and just because somebody lost their hair because they have cancer or somebody has another deformity right it's almost like goes Stoops down to our inability to be able to embrace those who are physically challenged yeah yeah you're saying Lois is talking practically he says the fact that the people are are they just move they're engaged you know you see you see a beautiful you see a beautiful home you see a beautiful painting you see a beautiful person there is there is there is an attraction the eye that's what he says the eyes the eyes are taken the eyes are taken and the title ones those who are doing that should have that that attraction that's the first thing is it's a very interesting explanation reminds me just a story when I was a kid the Bible used to come into schulted every day 3 15. everything's upstairs in 7-7 is a small show and they were dabbing there basically almost every day with a minion uh so it was a it was it was a very humble for it was a very humble it was a very humble and beauty and and moving experience there was a table there with the book and would learn on a bench so the devil would come in with paulina's Garden they would start ashrae and he didn't have a stand there he would just hold the sitter stand by the table and then because there's a shot after she would sit down and face the crowd and always always I don't think I ever saw even one exception he put his hand on his forehead like this and look in the sitter and just follow the shot's word for word every single day he would sit like this for decades for decades it would sit like this one day I wasn't there but I heard he didn't he didn't put his head on his forehead [Music] and it was a strange it's every day he would sit down he was facing the Islam on a bench he said on a long there was a bench that the bahren would use for learning it was upstairs a bench in seven seven and he would sit on that bench and they would use that bench afterwards it was no standard there was no chair but it would sit like this one day he sat down after he didn't put his okay so most people I mean there's no obligation you don't have to put the but he did it for so many years and the next day he did it again the next day not so you know bakram are curious and eager so they were trying to obsess their upset like just to change to change his meaning it was a was it it was a it was enigmatic so one of them I heard one of them asked one of the secretaries he didn't know how was he supposed to know after a while they Source on and off they realized I can't say for sure this was the reason but they realized the pattern there was a Jew maybe some of you even remember I know maybe you remember there was a Jew who lives in Israel and he would come to Crown Heights and to Brooklyn to collect money if it's DACA and he was born with a terrible terrible deformity you remember the Jew his whole face was blowing up he had it looked like he was in a fire huh shiman blind couldn't see his cheeks were blowing up and his whole body it was not a regular body I remember when I would walk on Kingston Avenue as a kid and I would see him and I was a little kid I would I would cross the street I would run away from fear simply from Fear as a little child you know you don't understand and I would get scared he was the kindest person in the world later I got all the sweetest sweetest guy in the world today he's married I heard then he has children an amazing person but physically it was very hard to look they realized that whenever he was by mincha the rabbit didn't put his uh his hand on the forehead even though that's what he did every day but if he was in the room he didn't put his hand in the front because I think he was afraid that somebody is going to interpret it that he doesn't want to see when he wasn't there he went back now you have to understand he was blind so he wouldn't see that the devil's hand was on the forehead but somebody in the room could think that he doesn't want to look at him so but here look how he did you see the opposite Trend right the Allah is stooping down and saying okay you don't want to look don't look we're not going to have him here he's not going to come in you don't have to look that's one thing to say for us something deeper he says the physical body is a mirror of the spiritual body [Music] every Aver every limb every organ the the the structure and the chemistry and the composition of the human body is obviously not random every single limb every organ every bone is designed yeah you see the gazal say that there are the 248 positive Commandments correspond 248 organs in zoir it says a 248 Mitzvahs are organs of the king's organs so there's a precise and meticulous meaning in the structure of the body so that when you see the physical body they says it's actually a reminder and a mirror of a whole higher deeper structure and that was part of seeing the clay in them who were doing that and therefore if something is blemished over there it would be missing that's what in the in the Observer that's what he quotes here from the same is the slam was to not say the perfect form of the Cayenne of a human being reflected [Music] a higher reality a higher skeletal a higher structure it was a it was a form of meditation it was a it would teach you something and in order that should not be lackings the title says that this coin should not do that fight this answer again is lacking of course because here again who's the one who's responsible for this deformity ultimately so his body has its its unique its unique mission so that's what he goes now Allah to understand the shadish is the root of distancing blemished priests from the service in the temple but now there's a paradox they were allowed to eat all the sacred meat even cut your Kardashian the two types of carbonus Kache Kardashian and kachem column are a more lenient Holiness that could be eaten also by the owner by the families by poor people by anybody as long as it was in your shalaya that's called cochem column means the holy of holiest carbonus could only be eaten by client in the base couldn't be taken out to the yerushalayim couldn't be eaten by anybody else why because there's a certain Holiness that only kayanam can eat the blemish can have an equal part in that they can eat everything even that means their Holiness is not compromised and we understand why they're probably more sensitive than other Kayana so when it comes to eating that like all the other kind of they can eat them and the part of kachem column that was lifted up and given to the Cayenne unlike the other parts that were given to the owner to eat they can eat that too because it says earlier the same bowel movement when it comes to the bread of his God from the holy of holies from the holy he can eat foreign whether a permanent one or a passing one are allowed to divide but be part of the division of the offerings and eat with all the other kind of in the base of English but they themselves can do the service of offering the carbon sprinkling the blood burning it on them is burning the incense all that that ah all right you're saying even though you swallow could like them good had luck Shader bizarre very good life I stand corrected burning the incense what's the question we have a paradox but he's saying I assume he's saying Rabbi Zach is saying if you get him a big torch and he stands outside and he could reach the Minotaur [Music] huh oh no because he can eat in the basement he could be you just can't be in the egg they didn't eat the carbonus in the heck is what's the problem here the gemara says part of the atonement of the one who brought the carbon is the Cayenne eating it in other words the eating of the carbon was a continuation to the hakrava of the carbon there were two stages one was offering it and the second one was eating it but the eating it was also part of the avoida if he can't do that for whatever reason this blemish Cayenne is not capable for whatever so the eating part is also part of the avoid and it's holy the holiest meat that yeah that's perfectly fine what's this paradox today well you want to make him feel good you don't want to deprive him from everything now sometimes a person can't do that avoid the person because they physically can't breaks both of his legs obviously you can't you have to stand so that we understand you pusher want to let him heal that's not the issue we're talking about different movement blemishes that he could do that void but he still can't but when it comes to eating yes perfectly fine even though the eating is part of it yes page 181. there's a saying a teaching on this even though it's part of Aisha but desire brings in this possible precious Emma about the balmum the blemish Kaya not going into the not doing that he says this is the language of this is the quote of the zoir there's now going to be a long quote it's going to be classically a zoharic which means kabbalistic quote and the whole mime is going to be explaining this quote of desiresi come and see in Gamora the expression is tashma it's coming here in zoir it's come and see because the difference between negative is the difference between hearing and seeing so when gemara it's always tashma and in Zoyo it's always takazi come and see during that time at that time when the river the river naged with nothing it flows and comes out Africa all types of souls all the souls come out together with the river that flows posix says again the river biracious the river comes out of Eden to irrigate the garden the river that flows the souls come out with the river as the means feminine the feminine the caver becomes pregnant with all these Souls so they all exist what does this mean this is pirush penis is the souls exist within the primius within the internal space of a kabbalistic level which is going to be explained called your side and the crown of isoid of malchus so the souls exist inside something we call pneumius your side in the body the different limbs correspond to the different Divine spirits it says are in the brain in the mind in the head different parts of the brainadasia the right brain you have the left brain the right brain is the left brain is the center is the right arm Guru is the left arm to Ferris is the Torso netzer Khan the two thighs and legs you saw it is the bris the procreative organ from which ultimately all creation happens through which we create new Souls that's called This is so you saw the icebridge kadish it's the tool of bonding of intimacy of connection that's your side and then you have malchus is the one you bond with which is the feminine the spouse so you saw it as the bris which connects with malchus which is the intimacy with malchus which is the femininity sometimes Malco is also associated with the mouth which is also communicated communicative it allows us to connect to other people because thoughts are still inside and speech begins speech begins communication he says all the souls exist in the premius of your side and in the crown of your side of malhos it's called CNA is and those are the two languages continues the katsi had always bug him when the moon became blemished referring to the story that happened in creation it says Hashem created the two great luminaries later he calls the son the great luminary and the moon Mara caught in the small Luminaire so the gemarian Holland of samach tells the famous story that really the sun and the moon were identical and then the moon started to complain you can't have two kings wearing the same Crown there's only one king wearing one Crown right England is not going to coordinate on Shabbos two kings with two crowns with one Crown doesn't work the crown either goes on you or on me so the moon says who has the crown so Hashem says you're right go diminish yourself and that's when the moon changed that's what the Ghazal said so in the beginning it says Hashem created two great luminaries later the name changes because the moon went through a whole transformation and this is called the blemish of the moon what do we mean the blemish of the Moon the sun doesn't do what the moon the sun doesn't have the issues of the of the of the Moon the sun has a stability and a consistency the Moon from our perspective it waxes it wanes it disappears it's Reborn it waxes again it reaches the wholesome moment on the 15th night of the month usually and then it right away begins to diminish itself and become smaller and smaller from our perspective until completely invisible and rebirth and this is essential to the systems of astronomy it's not because it's a bad weather outside you remember not because it's a bad weather sometimes the bad weather you don't see the sun either it's foggy it's rainy so it's not so light but that's only because of the clouds this is essential to the system of the Moon this is called gamalavana the blemish of the Moon the moon also doesn't have its own light the Moon is a reflection of the light of the Sun as desire says there in passions the moon doesn't have anything of its own light so the zoyah says rashbe says when the moon got blemished in that side or that element is a snake bisha's negativity like Pusha bisha it's in Aramaic it's like negative in the negativity of the snake the moon got blemished in the negativity of the snake today in what happened call inundism all the souls that came out even though they're all pure Tire in in Aramaic ish and they're all holy of enough because they came out from the blemished Moon because in any space where these Souls arrived Kulu is they all broke and they became blemished because with various forms of Anguish become a Caven with various forms of pain cave The Elaine and these are the souls that God has a special desire for a special love to Israel in Aramaic is a special rotten is a special love and sensitivity to these Souls holy Etc The Secret of this idea is follows is as follows these Souls are a mirror of the higher reality the body of the soul may be blemished the soul is essentially wholesome just like the only place from where the externals the hit Signum the Clippers can get their nurtures only from the vessels not from The Souls of the vessels not from the iris only from the Kalin the others are called nishma the souls in the parts of the parts of them are the structures of the spirits parts of means of face so only from The Vessel not from the earth and the vessel is a metaphor for the body and the light is a metaphor for the soul soul and body come from Ur and Kaylee the body is a Kaylee for the nesham it's a container for the soul just like by Hashem every Kaylee is a container for light so just like a buff the external forces could only get their nurture from where from the vessels not from the light so down here also the blemish can only be in the body not in the soul and then so he says the soul and the body are a mirror of the soul and the body above will begin and because of this Elaine Inon These Are the souls who need to be able to Rejoice with the joy of the Moon whenever the moon experiences Joy These Are the souls that experience that Joy together with the moon because they went through the whole process of the Moon with some of the commentary of the miktism oh that's the question what does the soul mean what does all of this mean so desire said this is a classic line and desire it's mystical it's difficult to understand that to somehow with a river came out Souls but the moon was blemished and that affected a certain amount of souls they went through the same process and they came out also with a blemish even though they're all pure and they're all holy don't think they're not pure and holy the blemish has nothing to do with their holiness but wherever they arrive they're experiencing different pains and different aches and different forms of anguish and they reflect the system above where the soul always is pure but the container can seem blemished and that's what their nishamas reflect as well and there's a special love to these Souls and when the moon rejoices These Are the souls that Rejoice with them all what does all this mean so this is a statement it's very mystical words so this moment explains this piece of Desire to understand this is first we have to explain what's the blemish of the Moon based on this is dependent and this is the source of the beginner of the blemish of the body of the soul the soul itself has two parts the soul of the soul and the body of the Soul foreign at the end of the month she's completely invisible and then she experiences rebirth and that's what we call the milot Millet means birth the birth of the Moon why is it called the birth of the Moon because it's so this it says no the Moon is now Reborn push it from a physical astronomical perspective the moon receives its light from the sun so therefore when we look at the Moon what we're seeing is the light of the Sun that reaches the moon and is reflected over the moon the life itself is a substance the moon doesn't emit light but it can reflect the light of the Sun so it's always based on its position vis-a-vis the Sun so it's very vulnerable the sun is self-contained it emits its own light the Moon is dependent on the connection with the Sun that makes it vulnerable what happens at the end of the month the moon actually gets so to speak closer to the Sun to the point that the half of the Moon the Moon is a boss only half of it reflects the light of the Sun so that half is facing the Sun away from the Earth so when we look at the Moon we don't see anything right so this would be if if this would be the Sun and the Moon would be facing the sun right right here and the Earth is here the Earth is here right so we look at the Moon what do we see we just see Darkness because the entire Side of the Moon that's present facing the Sun and bright is completely turned away from us this is known as the moment of the moiler this is rebirth the intimacy of the Sun and the Moon what happens afterwards the moon starts moving away moving away so a day later or two days later three days later we could see a little tiny what is it called the crescent why is it a little crescent because most of the moon is still facing the Sun but there's a little bit of the Moon that turned away because it starts moving so that's what we see the further it gets away the more we see and now you come to the 15th day of the month what happens now the Earth is in the middle the sun is here so the part of the Moon we see the half of the moon is completely lit up with the light of the Sun now it's the furthest away from the Sun that's when it shines the most now it gets closer to the Sun that's called the second half of the month so the light diminishes diminishes diminishes diminishes now it's Mama's getting close to the San Jose right until it completely disappears you don't see it and the moment of the myelid what we call the myelid rebirth You Don't See then the moon continues after the rebirth and when the witnesses can see and notice the moon the first time that's that's when they they testified and then they call it that's push it from an astronomical perspective and every month this is a process that takes 29 and a half days the moon completes its orbit 29 and a half days no exception 29 days 12 hours and tough since 793 parts we divide an hour into 1080 Parts it's much better than 60 Minutes mathematically a thousand and eighties is a very good number to work with in mathematics because of its flexibility for division so an hour when they announce the Milad design didn't stick yeah everybody knows that right the announcements the mother of the design didn't stick that doesn't show up on the phone ah no so let's say it's 402 right it's not 403 but it's 402 and 18 Parts because every hour has a thousand eighty parts so it's more precise we'll do 402 and 10 seconds right so it's not as a helic is not a second so this is called the blemish of the Moon it goes through this process which the sun the sun the sun also has it's changed we have changes of seasons that's because of the the the the orbit the the solar orbit is not a straight Circle it's on an angle 23 degrees or something so therefore right how much heat we get from the Sun changes in the summer in the spring in the autumn in the fall and the Autumn fall winter spring summer all the seasons because yes there's changes also but the changes in the sun are completely not like this it's not called pogum the levana is called pogum it doesn't have its own light and it goes through these processes where it disappears which of course we understand on an emotional level it represents something completely different than the sun in fact in English when you want to say you say a lunatic what's a lunatic anybody knows right I'm having a lunar moment yeah lunacy lunar is the moon why do we compare a lunatic to the moon but what do you want from the move the answer is because of the lack of stability the gemara also says it says in burkhinavian the sun knows its path the moon doesn't know what he's doing the reason is the orbit of the sun is a very predictable orbit the way you see it the Moon is a very complex orbit so it looks like he doesn't know where he's going he needs ways and even ways doesn't help the the orbit of the moon is a very complicated orbit it's like these Cyclones these roller coasters and the Six Flags it's very complicated the tracks you know it looks like it doesn't know what it's doing so a male it's a whole different type the moon represents the vulnerability the vulnerability the loss the diminishment that's what he says when it's Reborn you celebrated a new month um and there was a special carbon there used to be macro called the musaf it continues to grow half of the month it's full and then again the same cycle it diminishes it's concealed and then only evaluate and then reborn all his goddal and growing again holy every month there's no exception to this disappears which is like a form of death so to speak rebirth growing again reaching fullness and you wanted to stay there now again diminishment all because Hashem told the moon go diminish yourself tells the story with the moon I would complaining Hashem said go diminish yourself and the gemara continues there and says that the moon got very upset the moon told Hashem just because I said something logical I have to diminish myself I'm the one who said two people can't wear the same Crown it doesn't work that way right they'll kill each other what do they say you can't have two chefs running the kitchen you can have two teachers running a classroom you can't you want to know how we have two parents because they're supposed to be one they're supposed to be one and then right the Gamora says only if the voice of the father and mother are identical because if they have two separate voices you can't call them a bensary or a murderer the house is a fragmented house he's not a Ben cellular have to have one voice so the levana says I told you something logical two kings can't wear the same Crown either yankel is the son or I'm the son we can both be the son so Hashem said you're right go the minute she says because I spoke logic therefore I should diminish myself so Hashem started to comfort the Moon and said that all that sadikim are gonna be called by the moon they're all going to be called small everybody's they're like the Moon the Moon wasn't happy I don't need that so he said that the Jews are going to make the calendar based on you all their months are going to be based on you not based on the Sun the Romans have a solar calendar we have a lunar calendar wasn't happy go give it to the I I Don't Want to Lose Myself tried and tried all the Milas of the Moon and nothing worked so finally Hashem said bring an atonement for me because of what I did I diminished the Moon after comforting the Moon the Moon wasn't comforted he said at the end I'm to blame and that's where shradish we brought a special offering and it's the only offering where it says it was a goat says God's sin what's the sin of God diminishing the Moon now the story is a very strange story if you're really so upset about what you did you know you have an opportunity to to change it now if your name is God you could probably bring it back you destroy the moon he complains you try to comfort it he says I'm not interested so he said you know what I'm going to bring in atonement every month maybe you tried it like somebody once said it's the best my husband makes me sick and then he sends me to the best doctor don't make me sick enough to send me the best actor there was a kid he killed his parents right when he came to the judge I said what you do you deserve death penalty he says a little compassion for an orphan I don't understand you do it bring an atonement for me you can fix it so obviously there's something very deep going on here and what does it even mean bring an atonement for Hashem who's what's that atonement atonement means I hurt you so I want to apologize I want atonement I want forgiveness I say I'm sorry she say a Jew needs a kapada because he betrayed hashem's will whose will did Hashem betray his own if he wants if he diminished the moon he wanted to do it so who's he did an Aveda against whom is the Aveda against himself he wanted to do it so that was rasana so beautiful so God should say I did a Mitzvah I did my will somebody forced him to do it and now he has to turn the tone it's a very very deep secret obviously but this is the Covenant so this is the secret of Gemma salavana there's something in the blemish of the Moon that is somehow essential to the whole story of existence and that's the secret of the zayar that it has to do with the Journey of Souls different Souls that are connected specifically to the moon and different Souls that are connected specifically to the Sun and these Souls have a completely different Journey oh completely different experience and every month they go through this cycle and it's not an easy cycle to the point that at the end Hashem says I need to atone for myself I need to atone from myself for diminishing the Moon ultimately this process was set in motion by me a whole day if the moon would not be diminished there would be no night huh the definition of night would be different Elie wiesel's first book is called night it's about Auschwitz right you ever read it the definition of night would be very different they said of the balatanya it was a very deep Soul it was also very funny he had a gevaldica sense of humor you know humor goes two ways there's a joking type of dismissive humor that's latonis but there's humor that's really very deep you know it touches places that you can't express it through regular words you express it through jesta um so uh it says that he came to it's a small monkeys there's a story when he came to the balatonya the first time we arrived in lieuten he lived in liajina's Belarus was called White Russia at the time in middle of the night so he didn't know where the balatonya lived you know there were no signs so there was no music coming out of the house so he looked for a house where there was light and he saw there was one house there was light so he knocked on the door and thou himself was sitting and learning it was three o'clock in the morning and he opened the door for the small monkeys they never met before can I stay here middle of the night foreign and I thought that by you there's no night that's what I thought it says I don't think this house is for you I could find you another house where you could stay so he says he says what do you have to stay he says this is not a a Jewish house I want to say is I think another house would be better for you he says I want to stay here so they got into like this little debate so finally I'll call the Gentile and he'll expel yourself my guy is a lot stronger than your guy and that was the beginning of a very profound relationship so obviously the exchange wasn't just the physical Exchange when he said I thought felt that this is not a place for him why because if you're coming in order because you don't want to have night anymore you don't want to deal with any Darkness so ultimately it's not the death of the balatanya of transformation so he said there's other houses he says he wants this house she says what's going to happen is the guy is going to come and throw you out you're going to fall because you're coming here to fly to the heavens once you wake up and you become sober you finish your spiritual trip you're going to be out and it's going to be worse than before she tells DAL to that but my guy is a lot stronger than your guy I know about it I'm not coming here from a place of denial I'm coming here from a place of knowledge and awareness stronger than yours I know how stressed algebra systems are now coming I'll cope on them so night can have different definitions so if the moon wasn't blemished there would be a whole different type of night that we have today night and day would be different ultimately obviously if this was the design right what do you need an atonement a why do you need an atonement number one without if this if the moon is just like the sun there would be no night and you know for nature we need night right because if you have the sun 24 hours a day what would happen huh first we wouldn't honestly but also all the vegetation would be scorched it wouldn't be able to survive just like you need summer and winter it's all essential to Nature ah was well it's it looks like it was all the same day and then there's another question telling about uh and then there's another question if this is the design so why did Hashem wait for the moon to complain so create the sun one way and then Moon another way and everything is good no he had to create them equally and then the moon complained and then he diminished now the moon got upset and now he says a toad fight what I did it was a mistake or wasn't a mistake if it was a mistake wasn't mean God makes mistakes if it wasn't a mistake and it was the plan so would you have to wait for the moon to complain so of course it's metaphoric everything is metaphoric that's the point the physical moon is also a metaphor so it was metaphoric the physical the physical realities in astronomy are a manifestation of the metaphor huh yeah the Alam commercial but it's not just a lesson in the books the fabric of creation teaches the lesson it's the design of creation so what does this mean so from here he goes that away from the astronomy to the metaphor in other words it's all a spiritual metaphor that's then manifested in the physical when we say metaphor it doesn't mean that it's not in the physical sense it means the physical begins on a spirituals the whole story of the Sun and the Moon is a spiritual story and then it descends and is manifested by the way this explains also another very interesting thing we have a din in this week's parishapasious should establish the new month atom I feel a shag again even if you make a mistake you make the wrong calculations or even if you willingly made a mistake you willingly manipulated things because you thought it was the right thing to do and you made on the wrong day I want you to come with your stick and with your money and with your pouch for to be sure that would be a desecration of Yom Kippur because a different day because was a different day so to be sure started to cry and Ruby Akiva told him again the title says that when Basden makes even if they're making a mistake and he said you're my student but you're my rabbit in wisdom and he went on Yom Kippur because told them that even though astronomically it's not true so therefore I am keep it is on a different day and the day that he's coming today with his money is really in Kipper made a mistake it's not a problem the question is is this a joke is a fact so bezden said it's a difficult thing to understand is a real celebration right it's a real celebration so you need that day the mood the Moon is not changing because because of that because see this explains something very deep the celebration of the birth of the new moon is a spiritual celebration there's the moon physical and there's the moon spiritual usually when the moon is Reborn the spiritual moon is Reborn and that's the celebration how do we know when the spiritual moon is reborn we don't know the answer is we look at the physical movement the physical moon cycles represent the spiritual moon cycles because the physical is America the spiritual when bested which is a real best I'm not going to corrupt based in if it's a corrupt best if it's a real based in a Sanhedrin alpitaida that was ordained man to man to man all the way back to moshebenu and they established on a different day means that the spiritual birth of the moon is actually on that day there's a lack of alignment in the world between the physical and the spiritual and because a lack of alignment so if this on a physical level it's on one day on a spiritual level it's on another day that's the word because the real celebration of is not just the physical moon was reborn that too but it's the spiritual moon was Reborn because it's really a metaphor most times it's perfectly aligned but there's times it's not aligned on the spiritual just like in a person's life right sometimes the body is aligned with your emotions and sometimes not sometimes your body reflects what's happening inside and sometimes there's disconnect the body is doing its thing and emotionally I'm not connected like it's a disassociation there's a lack of alignment between the two the person's physical is not expressing fully his or her inner life that's the martial hair so let's now begin a little bit a few minutes within another few minutes that starts the explanation via Dua the second line on top you see 62 via duel foreign the whole story of the Moon represents something remnants it Intimates the middle of the Moon is always a metaphor for malachos feminine which is why as we will see as it says in svaram that the biological cycle of the woman reflects the Moon it's fascinating two weeks and two weeks the Moon is reborn it waxes there's a whole moment from altered about this it waxes for two weeks it reaches its full Glory you think the moon is going to stay that way then it starts getting diminished also for two weeks so it says in Savannah that the cycle the cycle of Nida of the woman of femininity is reflective of that cycle does the process of the blood and then the cleansing which is approximately a week or two weeks and then there's the Mikvah and then there's intimacy and there's like a rebirth so to speak in a relationship and it goes for two weeks and then again this process because levana is associated with Midas which is femininity what do we mean by middle small house the middle of hashems the attribute of malchus which is royalty leadership kingship gives life to the worlds of Bria Asia we speak about the four Worlds the highest world that Silas intimacy creation formation action the lowest sphere of artzillas which is malchus is what becomes the life force of Bria and Asia she descends there just like it's physically the moon gets diminished the malachus goes down and the same system foreign which means connected a line parallel to your side which is the bonding of the masculine and The Feminine the Sun and the Moon the Moon now goes up to receive from the Sun the spiritual son the flow of hashem's middays which are completely won with the one who emanated these middles which is the ancient the infinite one blessed he blessed be you understand Hashem is ain't safe infinite he emanated from himself what's called Midas that's called in Hebrew conferring conferring uh Authority matzo he emanated from himself the Midas that's all the sun is the quality of Hashem that goes down to give life to all the worlds but once a month they got to come back it got to come back to the source to the Sun to receive the whole flow of the Midas which are one with Hashem and that's the unity between the Sun and the Moon and that's a celebration of and then the moon has to go on its Journey again bye bye see you later and the moon goes on a journey it got the energy it got this light and now in this journey the light fluctuates sometimes the light is greater the light is smaller until it's diminished and then invisible and then is again this process it became invisible to us because it's receiving the greatest energy from the Sun it's facing the Sun away from the Earth and then it continues so the physical cycle is just a reflection of a spiritual idea is this whole Descent of the Moon of malchrus who could deliver it this dissent is in order to sublimate the Sparks the Divine Sparks that fell in a process known as Spirit the breaking of the vessels from the seven Kings of toyu of chaos which were all in a state of yesh of egotism the egoic Kings commercials it says that there are the kings of Edom that existed before there was a king for the Jewish people and he mentions over there eight Kings and the first seven it says each one reigned and died and this is known as the seven Kings of you the seven Kings the seven the seven Midas of island of the world of chaos where there was a breaking a death and the vessels broke and the Sparks and those vessels fell down and were scattered and dispersed and went through a tremendous descent and transformation foreign when you say each one was a king you say you know who died and made him King maluka represents when amida is fully revealed Leo's when it becomes something that's really self-conscious you truly feel it I can be wise and I can be conscious of my wisdom I can be kind and I can be conscious of my kindness I can be happy and I can be self-conscious of my happiness that's when the midday becomes a yes I'm suddenly talking about it experiencing it as a conscious conscious thing that's the malhose of it it becomes like a melach um and from this there was death liaison from this came all this other side not Holiness which are all the husks which ultimately become a full separate egotistical reality loymar to say like paralia the river is mine the point is the the the challenge of Toyo was the challenge known as yashas what does yashas mean yes just means instead of being one with the experience I'm busy trying to experience the experience which means I'm already separate from it foreign just like physically in a person when your body is in good shape is you don't feel it you know you have a good workout you're in good shape your body is light you don't feel it if you start feeling your pinky what does it mean what does it mean it hurts there's a scratch there's an infection there's a cut you start feeling your head what does that mean you have a headache you have a migraine if you start feeling yourself you're lethargic you're heavy you're exhausted right when you're in the healthier space you don't feel you don't feel it why because a healthy body is completely aligned with its life force so it's a conduit when it's a conduit it just is it's in the space of the vehicles of Oneness the moment there is illness there's a separation between the body and its life force you start feeling it it starts experiencing itself as separate because it's separate now and that means a lack of Health now this is very deep in a person's life when I'm in the zone when I'm in the flow I don't feel myself not because I don't exist but because my eye isn't the healthiest space it's aligned with the source of life whenever you're aligned you understand what I'm saying ah no you have to experience it talking about it is a problem because we're talking about it de vacas yeah the feeling when whenever amida is in its it's it's in its most natural state it's not Morgan there's no narrator telling me what it is what it's not I have a headache I don't have a headache I'm happy I'm not happy I'm miserable I'm not miserable I'm kind I'm not kind that's always when there's a certain separateness in completed Vehicles you could see it sometimes in a child and a child right who's experiencing real attachment there's a blissfulness you go over to the child and say are you having fun leave me alone are you happy leave me alone we go am I happy I'm not happy I'm having fun I'm not having one I'm boring I'm not bored I'm bored I'm not bored even think yeah if you're sitting at a sheer or you're sitting at a concert beautiful beautiful concert and you're asking yourself do you like it or not what does it mean it means you're not present if you're really there if I'm really there I'm not thinking do I like it don't I like it am I feeling good about it I'm not feeling good about it when I'm a little detached from it or very detached from it now suddenly words take over [Music] now suddenly feelings take over of judging it of analyzing it that's called his Gallows Hamid his Gala submitted here doesn't mean that you're emotional it means that the Meda is revealed it becomes a tangible concrete experience of yashas divorced from the Oneness itself this is what happened in and therefore vayamos from here came the whole reality of clipper what's clipper Clipper means a cover-up a shell a husk a blockage it means I'm blocked I'm covered over what's that I'm covered over whenever there's a Clipper there's a blockage over me I'm not in touch with the source because there's a blockage I don't have access you say I'm blocked the idea of clipper is the yesh the beginning of all blockages is yashas why because what does yashas mean you're not in the flow you're not one with the source when I'm one with the source there's no egoic mind that's busy being self-conscious which is the whole concept of spiritual death of clipper Etc which is divorced from the source of life does any of this resonate with anybody for it's too abstract huh you have to experience it understand it and our lives this this is much of the struggle of Our Lives am I in Vegas am I a complete Oneness and then there's no self-consciousness or I'm I'm out of that and I'm like I'm struggling now one doesn't snap their fingers and eliminate the ashes but the awareness of that is already extremely valuable the awareness of it when you're sitting on the floor or standing up playing with a child right they need full attentiveness full attentiveness means I'm not thinking about the fact that I'm attentive the moment I'm thinking about that ah I'm not there anymore I'm not present I'm not full so his Godless the consciousness of something means that it actually is it's already disconnected some some of us we live life there's a narrator in my brain telling me about things instead of being the The Experience I'm talking about the experience it's like a guy who goes on vacation right and it's always with a video camera I once read a a pub somebody who went on vacation he went on a boat he was on a river or whatever and he was with a video camera because he wanted to have memories of the vacation when he comes home so whatever he did he was with a video camera and then he says after two weeks I realized my video camera was on vacation not me he didn't allow himself The Experience because he was worried what's going to be after so he was videoing every experiences my video camera enjoyed the vacation I didn't I once heard somebody saying goodbye to his wife she was going to Florida for a few days he says do me a favor don't feel the pressure to relax you don't have to feel pressure to relax it's fine I'm now going to relax so whenever the any media any experience comes out as malchus which means it's it's it's displayed it's manifested it's already somebody I remember somebody once asked them if we filters it in Yiddish we filter that means how are you feeling yourself so he says good foreign if you're feeling yourself you know it's because there's something off so emotionally it's also that way psychologically it's also that way to be able to go out of the mind to be able to go out of speculation that's why it's so important not to live in the brain 24 hours a day it's hard for us Jews because we're taught to use the brain but the brain is only one tool in life it's not all of life nobody ever thought that you can experience cake through your mind MS nobody there's a piece of cake how am I going to experience the cake I'll think about it that's not an experienced cake you need your taste buds so why do we think that we can experience most of life through our brain the brain is made to understand logical ideas if you have to and that's a very good thing but most of life you can't experience through the brain we think the brain is a compensation it's not it's a distraction of experience life is experienced in experience in Oneness and intimacy and vacous the brain can be a gevaldica tool but it becomes a substitute for experience and that's a there's a sense of separateness any of this makes sense huh yeah first test this is the source of all Clipper it's not yet Clipper it's the source all Clippers there's a disconnect there's a disconnect it's very very powerful this it doesn't begin with Clipper it begins with yashas of toyo but the challenge is that's where all the Divine Sparks are in other words that's where life is happening can I live a life without self-consciousness can I really live that life we live in a world where this becomes part of reality I don't stay my whole life as a two-year-old in a sandbox just experiencing the joy of life that's the Journey of the Journey of malchus is the journey of finding the divine Within or the break Broken Vessels of Russia that's the Journey of malchus that's what he's going to continue to explain when you say malchus goes down it's a metaphor for everyone's Journey to be able to reclaim Oneness from a very self-conscious egoic mind from a mind that does live live in the ego and in the ego it experiences a lot of lot of things and the first thing it experiences is it's separateness that's the definition of ego definition of ego we're not talking about a healthy ego here we're talking about an unhealthy ego the definition of the ego is separateness is called yesh Yes means it exists existence is a good thing it's a good thing when it's connected to the real existence when it's separate from real existence therefore it has to become something because it's looking for a compensate for oxygen that it doesn't have because it's not aligned this is called his Galos Hamida every middle when it comes into his Galas it becomes self-conscious and felt now it starts experiencing the heaviness of gravity the heaviness of gravity exists in the physical world right light is not so subjected to the laws of gravity The More Physical spiritually what does that mean the more humrius the more heavy suddenly you feel the heaviness the heaviness of my personality the heaviness of my life when I'm light I fly 186 000 miles per second even faster spiritual light is even faster but the the the less light the more heaviness the more the Power of gravity is is pulling it down it's the covet that that's the beginning of the yes and then is from there comes all Clippers and says what's Clippers means everything that's blocked from being one with the source and there's a sense of separateness now this is a very internal process it's not I snap my fingers okay I'm not self-conscious if you do that you become more self-conscious it's a very very internal healing process of being in in in in in a relationship in in a relationship ah yeah yeah yeah and it's all about authenticity it's all about the realness of it it's the real connection the child is really there you know you sit down with a child and what do we have to play in the sandbox what do we have to play with your little toy what do we have to play ball yeah let's talk about playing ball do you like it do you appreciate it leave me alone stop talking about it stop talking about life we sit and talk about life stop talking to me hackness can shine it I don't know what you want I don't know what because the brain takes over we're gonna figure things out don't figure anything you don't have to figure things out you know everything the moment I have to figure things out it's already because there's a confusion I'm trying to substitute life with understanding of life very hard for Jews who are intellectuals to deal with this you have to know the limits of the brain the brain is an unbelievable tool but it's a tool it's not reality and sometimes all of reality we experience only in our brain and through our brain but that's not how you experience life I know about this problem I have this problem I'm not talking I'm talking from experience I'm not talking uh I'm not talking abstract words you could do it and if you have a good brain you can do it very well life becomes mathematic everything is mathematics everything problem is emotions are not a thematics Vegas is not mathematics God is Not mathematics he's a mathematician I don't mean mathematics is in middle of calculating what I'm saying but with mathematics you can't dance there's a formula for dancing they'll tell you the formula how dancing works but the dancing is the dancing then the lose it losing it losing yourself losing the brain I don't mean losing the brain the brain is where the life is but I mean losing the part of the brain that's busy analyzing and dissecting and giving conclusions and proofs and arguing and disputing that's all we are I'm not one with whatever experience I'm in okay this will be enough for today Major Hashem will continue this mimer on Monday morning 7 45 and everyone should have a beautiful day it's great to see you all Shabbos will have the regular schedule nice to see you yeah go ahead the Moon faces us yeah who's the same size yeah we Face always the same size yeah there's the near side yeah that's what we face yeah yeah yeah your face always the same yeah you know that yeah is always the same doesn't matter if we see it a little bit or right or diminishing we always face the same side of the moon yeah and the reason is because Moon rotates yeah and coincidentally nobody understands why the cycle of the moon rotation is the same as the cycle of the moon uh month so basically it rotates slowly the same way right and therefore the same we see only one side of them right we never see the back side of that one right and I don't understand why it's not a uh you know interpreted somehow because that's the most phenomenal thing that's powerful and the rotation of the Moon itself yeah yeah the rotation yeah so the moon rotates and the moon orbits the earth first rotates once a day 24 hours 24 hours is full spin full spin that's our speed Moon rotates once a month of moon lunar months no it doesn't rotate once a day it rotates 29 days whatever the cycle is Right 29 and a half so it always shows us the same face we see one side of the moon if it's small or big always one sign here I'm going like you and you always see me that's it I'm rotating around you you're rotating yeah I'm the moon and you always see me in the same way you see my face because because I rotate around you and my rotating around myself is the same you're saying the moon rotates itself once a month right the whole cycle of the rotation so that's incredible just stand ing there it doesn't so it doesn't rotate around its own axis you say yes it does but only once a month 20 rotates wow so the orbit around the Earth and the orbit around itself is synchronized perfectly and nobody knows why no it's a phenomenal thing yeah I think that this I think what we're going to learn is going to explain that really I think so um same face you would think once in a while we'll see it's going to be explained very nice very nice we can we can see the other side on the moon as well I did not understand it honestly yes oh no but one thing you do understand but one thing you understand if this is the Earth no but look if the Earth is here right the Moon is it's not like you understand you know like because uh sometimes you see a full moon you see a crescent but it's the same right just think about it facing you Moscow facing you yeah my birthday today mazel tov thank you so mazelton for the anniversary and happy birthday in good health and happiness Teaneck every day yeah it travels yeah resolution very nice so he had on the mantle of this imitator his wife and his wife's names after the divorce he wanted to take off her name his wife take off your own name take off your name take off your name very nice very nice if it says those words take off your own name take off your own name it was very nice mushrooms foreign wow and then there's and then it becomes a mashpia so it's both by being a cobble it becomes a real mashbeer yeah yeah