TNL in Jerusalem #14 - Jewish Joy

oh shiva israel national tv and the center for biblical zionism presents arya bradford jeremy gimpel live from the heart of israel welcome to tuesday night live in jerusalem oh shalom everybody and welcome to tuesday night live in jerusalem tonight's show is about jewish joy and we have one of israel's or israel's premier stand-up comedian to join us tonight his name is israel campbell and i'm sure all of you have heard of him i'm eddie sarah cameron the first time last year over pesach my wife and i love stand-up comedian comedy and uh teal and i sat down and it was such a fun funny wholesome jewish night that i said if i ever had the opportunity i don't unless i have a tv show i would have that guy on for sure and here one year later here we are now having a sterile campbell on i know it's going to be a wonderful treat for all of you so tonight is about jewish joy and sometimes i'm challenged with a lot of difficult situations a lot of challenges sometimes i get down trotted and when i do i think of a story that tahila told me a while ago in the name of the baal shem tov the baal shem tov teaches this story about an old man from europe long long time ago he was 84 years old his wife died his child passed away before he did even his donkey had moved on to a better place and every day he had to walk down to the village draw up the water by himself carry it on his back and walk all the way back to his house by himself the basham television goes on to explain that we are judged as jews every year on rosh hashanah in the jewish new year but more importantly we're judged every day by the encounters that we have throughout our lives and everyday occurrences now this man could have justifiably said why me god i'm 84 why my my wife is gone my child can let me i don't have a donkey i have to go all the way down to the well and draw it up and carry it by myself i'm 84. why that's not fair and the baal shem tov then says we are judged every day by our reaction and our interpretation to the events that happen to us every day we are the judge and the decision makers of how our day will be we have the power to make it a good day and we have the power to make it a bad day and what this man did instead of complaining he looked up to the sky and he said thank god thank god i'm so healthy that i can walk all the way down to the village draw up the water and carry it all on my own thank god i'm so healthy that i can still do that that's the difference that's the secret to jewish happiness that's the secret that's encoded within judaism and the infrastructure of the torah teaches us how to live our most fulfilled lives our sages teach us that our minds can only hold one thought at a time and human beings have this tendency to always focus on what we don't have and judaism comes to teach us to give gratitude and thanks for everything that we have that's why when we wake up in the morning the first thing we do is we say mo daniel we say thank you god i'm so grateful thank you for giving me one more day thank you for giving me one more breath thank you for letting my eyes open in the morning thank you for letting me be free thank you for all the things that we always take for granted you know a harvard study just came out recently and they had a group of four people group number one before they went to bed they wrote everything down that aggravated them throughout the day they let it all out so they'd go to sleep with a peace of mind if they got into a car accident stood in line a flat tire they wrote everything that upset them that day the second group they wrote everything that they were better than than other people if they were smarter than other people prettier than other people better looking nicer kinder whatever it was they wrote down i'm better than that guy at this and then they went to bed another group didn't do anything and they just went to bed and the last group before they went to bed they wrote down all the things that they were thankful for all the things that they were so grateful for happening to them that day harvard came out with the study and it proved that the people that were the happiest were the people that lived with gratitude and thanks modern psychology is now coming to the truth that our sages have been teaching us for centuries that a true jewish life a true fulfilled happy life is a life filled with gratitude that is the secret to jewish joy there's a famous hasidic story that actually it goes back centuries two rabbis rev simcha and robzissel they're walking along a stream skipping rocks talking torah really connecting on kabbalistic mystical levels and along comes a big massive cossack a boar of a man a soldier and what does he do when he sees jews he takes a stick and he starts beating them beats them to the ground then he takes them drags them throws them in the back of his horse-drawn cell and brings them to downtown minsk he throws them in the cell in downtown minsk now the cell has bars on all four sides and all the prisoners have their backs pushed up against the bars it's a sweltering hot day it's disgusting out it's miserable and why do they have their backs up against the bars because in the middle of this cell there's a big pot that everybody is using as a bathroom and there's flies it's terrible and they can't even breathe and rav simcha he starts to cry and revzilla says ravsempo why are you crying and he says well it's almost nighttime and i haven't prayed the afternoon service the afternoon service i hadn't created and i know according to jewish law i'm not allowed to pray in a bathroom and he was crying and he was weeping and resistance says but don't you understand that because we're stuck in this bathroom you're fulfilling god's will by not praying we should be so happy that we're not praying we're fulfilling god's will and we've simply realized it was true they started singing and they were dancing and singing and dancing and flipping and the cossack comes he's banging on the bars he's banging on the bars he tries to get their attention but they're too happy he's banging on the bars he says to one of the prisoners why those two jews so happy and he said i don't know i think it has something to do with that pot in the middle of the cell and he says oh yeah well then get that pot out of here you see sometimes truly the answer to our worst problems is just to be happy and that's why we've decided to bring a guest that will answer all of your problems that will make all of you happy i also saw him last pesach he is one of the a world renowned comedian very sought after here in israel i've been laughing ever since i've seen him he's incredible you saw campbell thank you for joining us thank you all right the question that everyone must be asking already how does a guy like you get a job as a stand-up comedian it's a good it's a good question uh first of all congratulations on the show the audience it's amazing really amazing we made them ourselves what a beautiful group of people i um i came to this as first i was an actor and i studied to be an actor and i went to drama school and it was hard to get work and i started writing my own material so that i could take more control over my career i started doing comedy and then when i got religious it worked perfectly because i could dictate where i work and how i work and the conditions under which i work so you're a teacher now at pardes is that true i do i teach a well i teach a creative writing class how does that work teaching in comedy judaism comedy i think is very revealing about i think one of the things that comedy allows me is that allows me to bring people to a place that just standing up in front of them and talking about something per se might not allow me to do but getting them to laugh and getting them to open up in that way and then kind of inserting the message allows me to do stuff that wouldn't i wouldn't be able to do simply so how can other people in israel and around the world see you perform well in israel i'm performing during holmoy pesach right here at the grown guest house almost across the street there's information downstairs there'll be information on my website www.israelcampbell.com y-i-s-r-a-e-e-e yes y-i-s-r-a like the soup campbell like the soup and you listen israel like the country can't be like the soup but with the y uh no relation or i would be sponsoring this show today so yeah all right well take it away sir we're waiting thank you thank you is it warm in here or am i it's just that i'm the only one dressed for poland in the 17th century i brought my herety briefcase what what is it with the with the haradam you know they can spend three thousand dollars on a fair hat and they can't buy a canvas bag as if anyone her radio would go to stymanski hi my name is israel campbell as uh you were told i um campbell's not a very jewish name it's not jewish at all it's scottish but israel is a very jewish name so on average i've got a pretty jewish name i said late people always ask they see me they hear my name they ask are you her 80 obviously i'm not her 80. i'm wearing a blue shirt and i should tell you these are not even pes this is the beginning of a comb over you tell me with a couple of well-placed keepa in the back can you tell i'm losing a little hair up top i uh so i grew up catholic people always want to know how vaguely catholic but vaguely catholic is catholic enough people always want to know though how catholic were you catholic enough to know i was going to hell so i switched religions that's a yiddish cult hey people always say there's no hebrew word for hell there's no hebrew concept for hell there's a hebrew word for hell adult hebrew language instruction is hell here in israel they sell it as a vacation open akiva netanya come to the beach it's warm it's sunny your friends will be there come to think of it that's the way they sell hell it's warm it's sunny your friends will be there i'm the firstborn son of a manic depressive italian woman and a pathologically silent irishman this makes me wildly emotional in a very quiet way i look calm i'm just going nuts on the inside i my parents went through catholic school all the way through college my mother then went into the convent thank god she left otherwise only half of me would be standing here tonight and it would be the quiet irish half my aunt though was a nun which makes jesus my uncle i'm not making that up that's church doctrine she's a bride of christ she's my aunt he's my uncle i only mentioned that in jerusalem for parking i converted to judaism i converted three times i converted in the reform movement in the conservative movement and then here in israel in the orthodox movement just in case i ever want to be buried here or have anyone eat in my kitchen i uh i should tell you i don't there's not a lot of time but i i i know i don't look like a reformed jew anymore but the reform movement gave me the warmest welcome to judaism that i ever received across the board and i always feel i need to mention that you know it's a mitzvah to call out the good and i want to do that you know because 36 times the torah says to welcome the stranger we suck at that i mean but i think that's what this show is doing we're engendering this idea we're supposed to be a light unto the nations and and and we've got to do that you know chanez right don't mix wool and linen in your clothing mentioned once nobody does it 36 times everyone's like what do you think they mean by stranger no one's stranger than your brother bill let's invite your brother bill over i should tell you this three circumcisions is not a religious covenant it's a fetish so there was two i moved to israel in 2000 i was uh i moved to no yeah it's crazy country living do you know that you know that israelis take 28 driving lessons to learn what lesson 12 driving on the curb don't look in the mirror what's in front is bad enough why include what's behind close your eyes jerusalem is a holy city i brought my vest well i got out of my car the law is if you get out of your car you're supposed to wear your vest let's go back through this okay 500 people die in traffic accidents last year this is the official response of the state of israel make a better target i would no more wear this on the side of an israeli highway than i would to say a dick cheney hunting party but it's a big debate you know in israel and in judaism is the land of israel holy big debate far reaching implications is the land and that was answered for me recently i was downtown jerusalem i watched a man park and before he got out of his car he put a handicapped placard in the windshield and then when he got out of his car and touched the land of israel he was healed he walked away from the car with no visible handicap i screamed oh hashem because i had watched him park he had been handicapped he wasn't as nearly as excited as i was about his recovery i read the jerusalem post because i'm a comedian you remember this about three and a half years ago the idf killed a master hamas bomb maker do you remember this the guy had one arm and no legs i'm gonna say he wasn't a master bomb maker i'm gonna say he was a mildly proficient bomb maker at best but my question is this if you show up for master bomb making class and the teacher has one arm and no legs can you defer till next semester because i want the two-armed two-legged master bomb making teacher you can imagine when a guy like me dressed like this shows up for a flight on ll with a passport that says christopher campbell they don't ask if i packed my own luggage they ask sir where's the bomb because they think i just forgot to switch the passport right and we get into all discussion when did you convert to judaism how did you convert to judaism i tell them the whole story right i say i was seeking a community of people with which i could struggle to have a relationship with god el-al is not interested in putting people on airplanes that are struggling to have a relationship with god they don't even like vegetarian meal requests now they ask why did you convert to judaism i say the women and the women of ll say of course and the men of el say good luck i was married here in israel we were married six years ago two days ago rosh hodish nissan 2002 march of 2002 was that crazy month over 126 israelis were killed in the month of march of 2000 it was a horrible month you know that if 126 rallies are killed countless more hundreds of thousands of it's a horrible month for everyone two weeks before the wedding we're arguing with the hotel about how many waiters per table a week before the home of the wedding we're arguing with the hotel about how many armed guards we want 12 armed guards they want nine armed guards and three guys with walkie-talkies i said look unless you hit the guy right in the head with the walkie-talkie it's not going to help menachem yes he's here great i kept thinking 380 people a small jerusalem wedding right we're gonna have 380 people in a public place are we crazy yes but that's what jews do the great rabbi abraham joshua hassell said that when a jew is sad he cries when he's even sadder than that he's silent but when he's even sadder than that he sings and that's what we did we gathered together we dabbed and we sang we took over the inbound hotel in the middle of the wedding i heard my sister say right my catholic sister say to my catholic mother this is as close to a grateful dead concert as you're ever going to get and there we were it was amazing it was amazing and to just almost four years ago now my wife and i were blessed with twins thank you i always say we gave birth but i didn't really do so much at the birth my wife gave birth she was the twins were small they're all usually small they're often small twins they were born five weeks early she'd been on bed rest at hadassah suffering hospital for nine weeks before that they were blessed thank god there our boy was 2.2 kilos our little girl was 1.6 kilos about three pounds she can't said it he got to be two kilos to come home 17 days later she was two kilos she came home at 17 days old wearing this and it fit she gained 25 percent of her body weight in 17 days thanks in large part to the russian nurses of adassahara soviet hospital because i fed her first meal 24 hours old she ate five cc's of formula in the nipple of a bottle they didn't even attach a bottle to it then i'd be feeding her a couple days later and i'd say i don't think she wants any more and the nurse would say she will eat do you think taping the bottle to her head is a good idea i fed comrade style that will feed her okay she came home wearing this it's from the gap she has american grandparents tag says baby gap newborn preemie zero to five pounds can i just say a zero pound baby does not need clothes they must know that at the gap that's all they do is clothe people imagine they had a meeting and someone said the dog will say baby gap newborn bring me one to five bounce someone said no right zero we can close the zero pound baby a pocket does a zero pound maybe need a pocket assume how baby has the other arms legs it certainly doesn't need a pocket this baby came home at 17 days old all they told us is that she has to poop four to five times a day i mean that makes sense that's her head that's her bottom how long could it take first day home a thursday she pooped four times that's okay that's within the normal range not gonna be one of those fathers that insists on the fifth whoop next day friday nothing cause it's shabbos you can't call anybody finally saturday night i don't know if you know this but in saturday no poop in jerusalem in late july when you have a baby that's not pooping shabbat goes out at like four o'clock in the morning finally shabbat goes out we call the baby adjustments pediatrician says the baby poops four to five times a day or once a week how can that be how can the normal range normal range totally normally 28 to 35 times or once those of you their parents know you i held this baby in my arm the first dish is born i looked at it i said you're going to go in the army no those of you that are parents know you hold your baby looked at i said i just want you to be happy that's it just happy and married but that's it happy and educated but that's it happy marriage and religiously and secularly but that's it in hebrew and english but that's it 17 days later i'm holding the very same baby thinking just poop thank you very much you've been a great a kosher and samayak baysack thank you is he awesome in the book of dvarim the book of deuteronomy chapter 28 it says all these curses shall come upon you and shall pursue you and overtake you until you are destroyed because you did not serve hashem your god with joyfulness and with the glad heart judaism isn't just about doing the right thing it's about having a spectacular time while you're doing it it's about loving being jewish not just practicing being jewish so many times people say the quality of life in america the physical quality the standard of living in america is so much higher than it is in israel as the physical quality of life i feel like all of us here today are saying who cares about the physical quality of life what about the spiritual quality of life we're here in israel and we're a part of the greatest revolution in human history and we want to show the entire world that what's happening here is a miracle we're in israel and we're having a blast and we want everyone to join us in the greatest celebration in the last 2000 years the jews of jerusalem are back and we're never going to leave just do it make aliyah join the family in this giant family reunion you won't regret it shalom from jerusalem oh um is oh hello oh is ah with um hello oh no you