The Ten Sefirot - Rabbi Yom Tov Glaser

[Music] what we're going to do is we're going to discover our special purpose what do I mean by that you know when you're in the zone in life and you're just feeling in the zone you notice by the way when you're in the zone like people like connect to you more on the street like people like no notice you more and like also people say yes to you a lot more when you're in the zone the and you also know when you're out of the zone you ever been in a party where you felt like out of your out of the zone and you're just like I'm out of here you you got to get out of there you ever had a job that you were like not in your zone or uh been in a relationship with someone that you just felt not quite in the zone the um so we naturally have a Zone and there are altogether there are 10 zones and we're going to learn all 10 zones and specifically focusing on nine of the 10 zones and we're going to try to figure out which of those nine this will be focusing on nine which of those nine zones are we um are we most connected to like which one's really me and then you know to celebrate your life in that zone that'll have a lot to do with who you marry it'll have a lot to do with occupation have a lot to do with how you spend your time because that's your special Zone clear again we have all kinds of body feedback and when we're out of our Zone the digestion will affect uh sometimes people get headaches uh acne uh uh breathing you know we lose our breath a bit when we're out of the Zone there it's important to pay attention to your body when you're when you are out of the Zone like to really be sensitive your body some people have such high tolerance for stress meaning their body is out of the Zone it's giving them all the signs and they totally ignore it until they're having anxiety you get that a sensitive person already recognizes even a little stress and say h what's that stress am I out of my zone right now and if I am maybe I can breathe through this or maybe I really need to get out of here right now or maybe you understand you got to know yourself and be sensitive to yourself and know when you're in The Zone when you're out of the Zone we're not always going to be in our Zone I mean there are people right now testifying in courts you know all over the planet no one wants to be in there they're out of their Zone but deep breathing a little prepping their prepping themselves before giving themselves a hot bath after it's really being sensitive to themselves because in the end they witness something and they have to go tell what they saw and no one wants to be doing that with two groups of lawyers coming after them you know for three hours but that's what was brought they have to stretch breathe get out get back to the Zone clear okay so be aware of your body be sensitive to it and honor when your body's telling you get out on the other hand we want to know not just when we're supposed to get out but we want to know what to jump into what's your zone now why are we here in Jerusalem opposite the Temple Mount trying to discover what our zone is the answer is is because we have the cabala and the cabala is the secrets of creation and the secrets of creation are how God created the world and in the cabala it actually gives over 10 ways which are really nine of how God created the world and those ways are in everything a given example let's take wave four and five wave four is flow wave five is structure okay look around no matter where you look you'll find ways four and five it's everywhere it's in everything I'll show you I give you an example here in my cup the water obviously is flow yeah and the cup is obviously structure and you'll see the water will flow into any structure now water of course has its own structure and cups have their own flow but the but there's you there's flow and structure going right right here when you look at the sun the sun is beaming down light with an absolute flow the ozone's structuring it and breaking it down so that we can live on earth when you meet someone yeah let's say A guy walks in the room am I I've never met him before am I going to give him a bear hug which would be Pure Flow no but I'll shake his hand nice to meet you do a little flow shake his hand give him some space I don't want to overflow and scare him give him a big hug and a kiss he's going to run for his life so everything is flow and structure meaning these this these two attributes of four and five which are flow and structure they are everywhere this was a tree it was nice and flow it got planed it got structured it's now a table the frame of the table was molten metal float but it got put in a mold structure okay everything is forign structure but I could have taken any of the 10 and just gone from that clear the kabalas teaching us that the whole creation's made of this stuff and we each one of you have a certain zone of the 10 that's your special Garden of Eden and you want to know what that is because then you can make your life choices based on that so let's look up here on the board and we will begin if you look on on the board so you'll see we've got I'm going to make a grid here and over here we're going to have uh also four lines one two three four now what I want you to notice is uh on this side is flow and on this side is structure okay flow and structure so we put wave three and wave four okay flowing structure but in truth all of this whole column as we develop it will all be flowing this is all going to be structure oriented zones there are there are nine zones on the table on the board and I'm going to make a tenth right here that's going to be the tenth so there's nine and a tenth our first question is to figure out if you're flow or if you are structure okay now let me explain what they both are and then I'm going to ask you guys to share with your floor structure meaning what are your factory settings are you more of a flow person or a structure person and I don't want to hear how you're reacting because if you have two structure parents and you've been like misf flow when in fact you're really also structured but you're just rebelling into this flow mode you ever met like a hippie who didn't do it well you know what I'm talking about they're trying to be the hippie but they just don't do it well and then the other person like tries as hard as they want can to be structured but they're total hippies even though they're trying so I don't want to hear how you react I want to know what your factory settings are okay so let's start with flow so flow people generally don't have much of a sense of time they uh they love free time they like God to be in charge of their itinerary they like um by the way in Bed Bath and Beyond they know that every person who shops there is either floor or structure so when you go in there you'll find like drapes that have like sharp lines and angles on them for all the structure people but then there will be these very beautiful kind of maybe paisleys or there will be flowers or whatever because the flow people will automatically buy those the plates have the same thing the flow people will go for the more antique looking China while the structure people will go for plates that maybe the salad Plate's triangular or if it's round there might be embossed on the plate geometric shapes that have very hard angles to them is that clear so they know for everything they're selling there there's flow and structure people and if they're smart and I've been to places in Israel where the department store has the flow stuff on the right because flow people tend towards the right and the structure people tend towards the left and in fact your brain is right brain is your creative flow brain and your left brain is your analytical structure brain and so there's our department stores that actually when you're walking you know that aisle you walk down to get up to the next escalator they have all the flow products on the right and all the Structured Products on the left clear okay structure people they do get time they're good with time and they don't mind a free summer but they're going to schedule it they're going to schedule it and put in everything that they enjoy to do and uh where's the flow person they don't mind missing certain things as long as they could just keep the schedule open and that's the flow prison structure people like it like that they um uh flow people like change of plans they love you know spontaneous shifts whereas structure people they don't like that so much flow people uh tend to um they tend to be a lot looser about what they wear and stuff like that um just kind of grab whatever shirts on top and structur people are more like deciding what look they're going for you know they're going to they're going to choose their clothes very carefully like that um that's it and also like hair is obviously a flow and structure decision that someone can make but not everyone makes it but you can have that kind of thing going on and there's also people whose hair is naturally because we're talking factory settings so they have naturally uh structured hair follicles in their heads and there's others who are just like I don't know have you ever met a girl with like like pure Italian curls you know and they're just like giant Italian curls and she's just like total flow you know and her everything's just curly in her life just what what do you think and what's the example I think I'm very much structure yeah like like I knew that if like I'm just using this as an example but I knew that if I came to Israel I definitely want to do a program just because if I come to Israel and I don't like have anything structured I don't think that I'd actually do anything so just using that as an is she floor structure she gave it away she's float she's float and she realizes that she needs to have a superimposed structure upon her or she'll do nothing she'll be on the beach you know you're float yeah your flow your flow and you're crying out for structure yeah okay yeah I'm the same way I'm flow if I don't have a structure oh my gosh I'd be in bed today right I'd just be like just enjoying my down comforter you flannel sheets and excellent okay so you got it perfectly wrong and and we've got it perfectly right now and so it's important to get this guys you want to celebrate what you are and then stretch to the other side so so you celebrate and stretch so they I'm celebrating being flow I stretch to be structur which makes me Balan right so I live in a balance but it's only because I'm celebrating what I am and I'm stretching the other side okay send the mic over gohe what do you think floor definitely flow yeah yeah just go along with it no worries it's all good no worries mate that's it that's it uh so good uh very good okay good H keep going keep going are you necessarily like one or the other is everyone necessarily one most people are now by the way I didn't show you there's a Continuum here so uh we need the UR here okay so there are people who are like extreme Darth Vader structure like over there but there are structure people like the E over here they're they're they're struct but they're really more towards balance yeah and then you get flow people who are like you know out there yeah and they're like extreme flow types and obviously these two should never marry that's why marriage will come up in this like these two would kill each other yeah so this person obviously should marry someone there and that person should marry someone there you know to balance them out and not to be angry at each other yeah go ahead please what's your name Olga please um I'm not entirely certain but I think I am more on the Flow side um I don't like struct I don't like structure although I do understand its necessity at times generally if structure is imposed on me I'll try to break break away from it amazing wow okay so that's something to be really aware of and know your signs when you're about to break out of a job or a marriage or you know Mommy again there's so much structure in our lives and you got to know when you're starting to like break up you know you're starting to break loose and you got to catch it and like take deep breath hot bath give yourself a prize at the other side of all the B Bedtime Stories and you know what I mean okay please um my name's Amy Amy and I think I am flow we just got the flow everyone's got the flow back there yeah I was looking at your group I only noticed like um I don't know I was thinking like there's a couple structures but mostly flow yeah go ahead um yeah I just think I don't I don't know I'm a big procrastinator so I don't have a lot of structure yeah no natural structure okay very good okay let's hit one more yeah um I'm Paloma and I don't know if I'm like truly structor and I'm all the time trying to flow of say of if I'm flow and I'm all the time T trying to make a structor you know like I'm wow all the time in the conflict like I don't know like I feel the same as her like I came to the STP I will never go with a alone but I will never make the plans you know I will never plan what to do in Israel and to make all the structor but I came to a program that they make me the structor so I don't know okay it could be it could be your flow it could be your flow also I don't know okay any structure people here I'm sensing your structure so I think yeah she's trying to see yeah you're are you structure interesting the structure people I'm I'm wondering if you're structured too by the way so and you I can't tell and you also can't tell go grab the microphone but I I'm sure she's structure go I reckon I'm structure as well I like schedules I like to know exactly what I'm doing when I'm doing right long lists of stuff I need to comp have amazing great example great example you know yours yet I'm sort of stuck in between I think yeah um generally I sort of just like to go with the flow and whatever happens happens but occasionally I do like a structure and to know what is happening uhhuh and things like that amazing okay very good you could be right in the middle could be right in the middle okay Miss structure over here why do you think I'm structure it's I've been doing this a lot of years yeah know I like to be organized I don't like being late so I generally get ready early and things like that yeah I think I am definitely structure I'm occasionally Flo I can be slightly lazy at times but generally I'm structure excellent excellent you want to keep going since we're doing it you yeah I'm not quite sure which one I am like I take things from both sides I guess like I like being I guess laidback and not having any plans but if I do have plans and they change I get like I guess a bit anxious about it and stuff um and I guess yeah I'm sort of like when you said about the left and right hemisphere like I use both I'm musician and accountant so it's sort of like you're a musician yeah and what's your medium um I play the violin and I sing amazing and when you play the violin you're playing classical music or Bluegrass yeah I I play classical and kma andma with that's both flow and structure yeah classical is generally very structured and clas Maran but you chose a structure scarf you realize that's my mom's yeah yeah but that's the one you stole yeah yeah is she structure yeah I think so yeah she's more structured than me I guess okay great yeah okay since we got everybody you might as well share hey um up until now I would have said I was flow but like same as Rachel um at the end of last year I wanted to change my degree to Fine Arts law I'm just very from what basket weaving no from from Arts to try and discover what I liked but um yeah like I I like doing as much as I can and to um do everything to the fullest but then again I like I don't know yeah you might be a little more balanced as well like uh like you said what's your name again Debra Deborah I okay very good and your name Zara Zara okay very good you can keep that for now um let's head up here now one thing I did not offer I did not offer the middle the middle is balance the reason why I didn't offer it is Everyone likes to say that's them and I don't want to say that because I don't want to hear that because everyone wants to feel they're the one who's the balanc the balanced person's one in like 60 people they're not a lot of people like this they're very hard to find they're generally managers they're in managerial roles depending if they're the the top meaning if they're this group this group or this group but they're always going to be managing whatever they're managing and um they're they're an interesting folk they flow like the mess and they structure like the best they would never be worried at all about a change in plans that's cool for them happy with change in plans yet uh yet very planned and very principled in their plans and they and they can like just organize everything yet yet let it all go and just you know throw it all to the wind and just go with the flow it's a unique character the very very few people like that it's hard to meet them they're um but they exist I get to meet some sometimes and it may be two of you it may be Miss kmer uh classical music violinist singer what's your name could be like Rachel or could be like am Amy Deborah sorry de Amy Deborah could be that one could be I'm not sure you are more likely thinking you maybe I don't know but they anyway but that's it and most people meet who are balanced isn't because they're truly here they're balanced either because they're celebrating but stretching and that causes balance or they're celebrating and stretching and that's causing balance or she's the F of flow or he or she is the E of structure meaning they're really flow or structure but they're just very close to balance clear okay now that's your style that's your style whether you're Flor structure is your style we're done with style we're moving on and what we're moving on to is what is your USB cable interface to the world how do you interface with the planet around you with the world around you how do you interface now there are three options for ways to interface with this world those three options are as follows they are the intellect then there is interpersonal okay interpersonal and then the last one the three eyes is instinctual and or I should just put Instinct it's probably a little more accurate right now okay intellect interpersonal and instinct or instinctual this is how we connect to the planet like how we connect to reality around us and we connect through all three like when I'm reading a book which one am I doing when I'm studying the Torah intellect right when I'm teaching a class right now what am I doing inter personal and when I'm eating the lunch that I missed today and when I will later go get something to eat what will I be involved in that's Instinct okay and what it what happens is human beings each person has a certain uh formula of how they interface you have to interface with all three you can't get away with skipping any of them you need all three but but you have a propensity for some more than others and what you want to do is create a hierarchy of the three so we'll call this one this two and this three so I know in my life I am a two three one that's the hierarchy in my life meaning I'm mostly interpersonal so my job for example of teaching Torah is a and especially the way I teach Torah because I'm not teaching in a room sitting with you know everyone's beards on their books you know that's not my life I never do that I mean rarely rarely do I ever teach talmud like that so I'm always busy you know like in a room interacting connecting you know I'm totally trying to like speak into the pocket of the listeners like really getting by the way my instinct side is very good with that too because I'm sensing people I have a strong sense of people and so I I'm able to like totally re route a class because of the way the people are reacting and that's my instincts it's also interpersonal it's interpersonal with Instinct together now whereas you'll have an intellectual lecture where they'll be like this week's paraa that we'll be discussing in the Torah is the paraa of Jethro you know and everyone in the room's just like okay you know like you know this is going to be like okay I guess I'll take notes I maybe I should just leave my MP3 player and go down to the cotel for the hour you know like so so the but in certain context that's fine certain context that's like okay I want to know all about the para of Jethro you know uh but you can imagine you could learn that para from someone who will just like speak right in the pocket and like totally like give you the para in a way that it's yours as opposed to just staying it purely intellectual so let me explain the three interfaces the three interfaces the intellect interface by the way none of these have to do with brains for example the smartest person right now in ASA in asaa who's in behind this window is where the study hall is out this window um the smartest person in the Yesa right now is an pure Instinct guy okay he'd probably if you really left him to his own desires he'd probably mostly love to have his hands covered in grease working on a Mustang GT no forget the GT he'd he'd be wanting to let work on a like a 1950s Mustang and he'd want to take apart the entire engine and put the entire engine back together and then drive it like across like 30 US states you know and just like live out on the road you know he happens to be the smartest guy at H right now there's nothing with brains is that clear and he by the way is tremendous he has tremendous reward for his study all these years he's become one of the greatest scholars in aatar and it's not because it's right in the pocket he has stretched all the years to do this and has become a real scholar real Torah scholar uh that's not good for everybody but he chose it that's that's what he wants in his life you know he had enough of Mustang you know 1950 Mustangs he did that been there done that now he's in the wisdom part of life okay so intellect they love ideas they love Google they even love more Wikipedia um they just they read it they they they prefer to get it on their own they like to be alone a lot they're they're uh because when you interrupt them they get like talking to you they're going to get a lot less info than they're going to get online or in a book or you know learning Torah you know there's just so much info by the way when they discover the Mitzvah of studying Torah they're like sold you know I'll take it you know these guys when the we get these H guys if they're an intellect guy and they discover like how much we honor study here in Jerusalem they like they send an email to their family saying saying uh soand so has died we can't find his body you know this is what they send back to their family we can't find his body uh don't bother looking because they're just like they can't believe there's a whole society that just simply honors wisdom and the acquirement or achievement of knowledge and it just blows them away for me it was also very exciting to see all the wisdom but that's not where I live you get that I liked being with all the guys it's like a fraternity you know all the all these guys we're all changing our lives together and we're spending shabas meals together and we're you know so for me it was about the interaction because I'm much more interpersonal now so number one is intellect they love ideas and they love spending their time with those ideas and gaining more ideas the second level person is the interpersonal and the interpersonal they their brains really turn on when they're with another person all of I mean they could almost say nothing and you know you have your inner voice that speaks their inner voice could be very quiet but as soon as they're with another person it's like now it's on and and they could talk all night and they could just you know so much comes out of those conversations and they can discover so much more just by having another person with them and they're more they're very comfortable at parties occupationally they work great in like sales restaurant anytime there's a lot of interaction they like interactive jobs the uh intellects like scholarship jobs professors Torah Scholars um the interpersonal people like very much the um they like the uh just the interaction human interaction that's where they live that's what they love okay and then the the last is uh Instinct Instinct people are very tactile they're very sensual like the the Sens they like to taste things they like to touch it like it's only real to them when they touch it Judaism becomes real when they see the family on chabas like they they they experiencing the food of shabas like they they they love food they love like exercise they're often musicians and they're often you know artists or involved in sports or other other forms of exercise and stuff like that but they're not just keeping in shape they they connect by doing exercise they connect with that sport or that art form or something like that they like to gush it you know they like gushy stuff like Potters or Instinct oriented people is that clear got the three okay very good I'll just use my example one more time so I'm at 231 you want to know your number system that's what I mean if I ask you You' want to say well I'm a 132 or I'm a 312 I'm a 231 or a 213 and you want to get it down like what are what's your hierarchy so as I was saying I'm a 231 I prefer the interpersonal stuff if I'm not relating to people so then I'm automatically like that's it I'm going either mountain biking or I'm going to go surfing I'm GNA be doing yoga or I'm going to be you know taking a hot bath I take a lot of hot baths I love hot baths you know essential oils candles music just soaking away in the in the bath I'm crazy about beer and uh and the Mexican food okay I stretch to this again this celebrate stretch I stretch to intellect and I generally only learn Torah with another person there which is called a Kusa you guys know the term Kusa I only learn a Kusa because if there's not a person there my brain just goes soon as my and so I have to have someone there and I will learn with him but that's where I stretch my wife thank God is also a 231 but hers are much more balanced hers are much more balanced so she's much closer to you know she loves obviously relating to you know people and instinctually you know she's very into sports and Cuisine and all those things but she but her intellect's stronger than mine that doesn't mean she's smarter than me again we're we're not discussing your smart smarts we're discussing just how much you love to play with ideas and be in ideas and she really loves that so she studies a lot a lot more than I do she elects to study she doesn't need to study with anyone else when we were first married we'd finish the chant you guys know what chant is chant it's that hot stew we eat chabas day so for every bite of chant you eat there's a you know it's like an hour of sleep so when I finish my Chun where do I want to go I want to go to bed so when I first uh was married my wife would finish the Chun and my wife would say to me she would say to me uh honey would you like to learn a little Torah and I'd be like yes dear you know and she would start open up some book and we'd start reading together I'd be reading like the first sentence and I'd just be like so that went on for a few weeks and then it was like uh honey would you like to learn some Torah and I'd be like yeah can we learn in the bedroom uh you'll read and anyway we're we're married 19 years now and she just she just she just doesn't ask anymore she knows where I'm going after that chill it's like so funny it's just it's hopeless I I don't mind learning later and I teach third meal I have an open third meal you're all invited the uh but I I teach during third meal I'm into Torah just not after my chill okay okay so what are you are you a 312 213 3 two one everyone take a moment think about it um I think it's a 321 you're a 321 yeah uhuh excellent amazing give us one example I want the example of the one you're most the one you interface with most so that would be the three the the three an example yeah just one example of how you naturally go there that's your Zone um well I I do a lot of Art and also at University and I had a drawing assignment in and I started at 9:00 in the morning just doing some drawings and the next time I looked at my watch it was five so I was like I just didn't realize the time went past so amazing amazing so you you like that you're you like the handson okay I am a 312 um with Instinct um yeah I'm a musician but I love food like I really really love food and I exercise as well like I have connection with exercise um yeah it's like my outlet as well amaz music and possibly food as well wow food exercise music great amazing [Music] okay I think I'm at 231 2 3 one yeah um yeah I really like being with other people and hanging out um Al I hate studying by myself I go crazy I can't do it and if someone else is there I tend like either I go crazy with them or I behave myself and I study but it can go either way but um yeah so I just really like being around other people amazing okay um I think I'm a 3 to one I think I just my mind sort of works better when I do things um practically and like if I'm just sitting and reading it nothing will go in but if I'm actually doing something it yeah amazing amazing okay excellent example yeah I'm not too sure but I also think I'm a 312 uhhuh um also as Deborah said like more handson with things and yeah rather than just learning like to be involved it wow powerful okay uh I'm I guess I'm 2 13 and because I guess nothing that what I do or what I listen or what I experience if I is no one I beside me it's like I'm not leing it you know like if I'm watching something or I'm hearing music it's like if I don't have to share with someone it's like why bother yeah like that's amazing yeah isn't that powerful like and you guys like the artist for all those hours like can you imagine living like she does like if there's someone else isn't on the other side of the chairlift sk's irrelevant you know it doesn't SKS just doesn't matter it's amazing it's amazing yeah um I think I'm 321 yeah like I like being creative and like exploring new things and traveling mhm great okay I think I'm a three in one and then a two m it still goes 312 though um the things that give me the most energy and the most happiness are dancing and music and then afterwards um ideas uhhuh and yeah lastly people yeah we'll try to stay out of your hair you we try not to bother you I'm definitely um as you started I could see straight away I was 3 2 1 you're a 321 also definitely from the outset and because I make all my big decisions based entirely on Instinct even when they defy all reasonable logical rationale wow wow you need exclusively you need a Reby in your life thank you you could get yourself in a lot of trouble making all your decisions based on instincts I do I do I do you do but then also when you talk about the flow like I'm very much like side kind of a struggle with yeah you're you're a flow you're flow Instinct I'm completely free flow flow Instinct yeah what do you do for a living Agate disability crisis Emergency Services I save the world wow excellent so um uh okay great anyway the the having a guide in life for for Instinct people so important meaning uh I have a class on YouTube called finding a RV if you type in finding RV really had to find like your RV not just a RV like your RV well the r sent me here did he first yeah wow that was nice of [Laughter] him so amazing okay keep gu um I'm not sure like I think I'm a 231 um I'm like at my happiest when I'm like interacting with babies that's interesting so like but I'm very Hands-On with them as well like love giving like cuddles and playing and but like I hate exercise and like that sort of stuff and I'm yeah I'm a bad learner as well so wow 2 31 well you learn but you learn probably through more interaction and experience yeah very much experience and like on the job kind of so interesting so we didn't get one one person which is normal no ones are very rare in the in the men's World ones are rare the majority of men are are twos and threes u a little more threes than twos usually not necessarily I would say the men are kind of split evenly there and then there and then there's a little bit of uh a little bit of intellect Men by the way it's good not to be a one it's good not to be a one because there's issues of U arrogance because you see you play violin right so you can have arrogance over other violin players but over someone who's a carpenter you would never like feel hoty whereas with people who are intellectuals they're you get you know everyone has a brain everyone has an intellect and so if someone's like a real strong one so they uh they can feel hotti over the planet over the whole planet and it gets hard and it's hard also because a lot of men aren't ones and if a woman's a one it's hard to respect her husband and she has to really work on herself to uh to respect him so so it's a good sign that no one said there were once um and again this is a celebrating and stretch you want to celebrate what you are and stretch the other side what I'd like to do is share with you guys a little bit of uh occupations and who to marry how would you like that yeah okay do a little bit of occupations who to marry so so um first of all structure jobs generally make more money okay but flow people don't care okay they they'd be they're happier to be in their Zone and do you guys realize now you already know what your main zone is because if you said you were flow or structure and your instinct meaning most of you women were here most of you when were here and so that's the special Zone there of the nine of these nine of the 10th this is the spot that's your golden spot and I'll talk about that in a minute the uh um these are intellectual jobs intellectual occupations professors and and uh Scholars of all kinds okay researchers also occupations that require a lot of that time for example here a surgeon would have to have a lot of time he's got to be structured she's got to be structure oriented and um she's going to be spending a lot of time in school a lot of time in school and this this is why so many psychologists are lousy it's a weird field like every surgeon to make it has to be good otherwise he can't start cutting people in Psychology most of them are not good and then there's some good ones and you know they're their needle in the Hast stack to find Excellent ones why because these are people who were willing to spend all that time up here but what what of intellect interpersonal Instinct should be a psychologist which one interpersonal one that's the one who's going to make the best psychologist so but they're not always willing to spend that time studying all that stuff see someone's in med school and they decide H do I want to be an eye surgeon a heart surgeon or a psychologist and they're like maybe I like people I'll be a psychologist but meanwhile you know they're trying to put you into some kind of structure of like their studies in Psychology and you're just like come on you know like like get me you know you want to gotten and whereas interpersonal people really get you and this is why there's been this giant amazing expansion of what's called coaching coaching is this huge thing today why it's all the great people who really get you but just aren't willing to you know spend time in University for 10 years you know having their their uh kind of instinct interpersonal realm crushed by textbooks and so those are coaches and they very good and they're usually here coaches are usually here because it's kind of their own schedule you know they they'll tell you when they're available and live their own schedule and be over here but these are all coaches anyway so these are intellectual positions these are interpersonal so uh here's a physician a family doctor good bedside Manor knows how to say o you know when you tell them you got a boo boo you know the um the uh this position here again managerial so like the ultimate position there would be uh I mean it's just a uh kind of a typ cast position but it would be a proprietor of a restaurant it's very hard to make in the restaurant business you have to really understand how to create a profit margin out of all that food and have you guys ever made a meal for like 10 people you ever tried that was it crazy and stressful and hard yeah how about 200 people an hour you realize what kind of structure ability you need to have so you might think that someone who's running a restaurant should be on the structure side if you have a person running a restaurant they have to be able to go with the flow can you imagine missing like you come 10 minutes late for your reservation and they're like Sorry Charlie you know you missed your reservation we gave your table to someone else who came on time you know you should be like never coming here again you understand like you they're all they have to first of all totally interpersonal they have to be able to handle to create how to create a profit margin out of a menu and get everyone paid and everyone dealt with and all those meals served yet be able to totally go with the flow with the with the whole thing I mean you can have a so much can happen in the restaurant business in a given hour a given 10 minute period and they have to be able to totally undulate with what's happening and move accordingly okay it's just a good example it's a type there's many example many examples of great positions there this is people they like freelance they like to teach they like Humanities and philosophies and stuff like that meaning they is be this person would like to teach history or or uh you know things Happ to a thought and stuff like that but they want to teach they want to be really relating to a class of full of people and uh and they also they love their free time they their Summers off things like that they get their summer off and someone here could be also a great teacher but they'd probably want to be teaching something that's more like geometry or you know something that has to do with structure okay now down to the instincts the Instinct uh occupations are here again this is more managerial so this is someone who could be running a yoga studio running a gym or running a um music program or something like that so they're always in their Zone they're in music or they're in arts or they're in physical exercise or something like that but they're but they're managing everything and dealing with the same kind of details that the restaurant proprietor might be dealing with but uh but in a instinctual Type of Way um they and by the way they could be they could be good at restaurants but they would miss the interpersonal aspect the um structure side of instinct are people who are involved in uh the Arts or or um it could be a physical therapist where they have to understand so much of the human body to to be able to do that work but they really spend their day all all day working with people been injured or maybe have to pick up their skills in a certain part of the body and they're they spend their day in bodies ultimately so they're in the physical world it's not so important that they're interpersonal and they're dealing with structure all the time whereas over here this is where you get um this is where you get uh artists musicians um people who are uh really good with kids often um lifeguard you know like hanging out on the beach as a lifeguard yeah total flow total Instinct all your senses are being touched all the time and uh and you're able to act instinctually for the emergency EMTs emergency workers all are down there um very very wealthy business people are often here okay like for example imagine a wealthy stock Trader in Wall Street they spend their whole day staring at three screens those screens just have codes and they have codes what the stock is and then how much it's trading at and it's just like I mean that would give me a nervous breakdown just staring at those screens for like 10 minutes not to mention the fact that they I don't even understand what's going on over there because I'm floow but they have their pulse on the market they have their instinctual connection to the market and it's how it's like moving and they just know when to buy and they just know when to sell and they don't second guess their Instinct on that they're very very wealthy business people are usually right there CEOs of big corporations are usually up here and they hire people to consult the people in their firm and they have people who are building you know new branches of their firm which are more in construction and they're you know spreading out and expanding into new you know new construction for their company um and then over here uh oh I did flow Instinct yeah did flow Instinct um last is who do you marry who do you marry Who Do You Love so the answer is well throughout history there's always been an argument between opposites and likeness do you like the opposite or do you like someone who's more in common with you and so that's like an age-old discussion of whether opposites or likeness attract and the amazing thing is when you're coming from the kabala so you're going to get you're going to get to the truth of like what's better opposites or alike and the answer is both when it comes to your style Flow versus structure so opposites better not extreme opposites that would be dangerous for a good marriage but if someone's extreme they should get the F of flow extreme structure F of flow if someone's extreme flow yeah they should get the what e of structure okay he'll still be frustrated with you yeah but but you know he gets it he gets the he gets this flow aspect too balanced people can marry either does not matter they can marry the extremes they can marry they they're cool with either side but once you know what side you are so then you you go to the opposite side for who you marry okay and it's pretty important because kids being raised by two structured parents it's instead of two structure parents it's too you know two structure it it freaks the kids out it it doesn't allow for the magic of Life enough because flow people are about the magic of life and structure people well you got to have structure good luck drinking water without a cup you know so you need to have structure in life someone's got to make the Chun you know shabas is coming you know he's like well I'm going off to yoga and she's like well I'm going no poetry reading and you're like who's going to make the chill you you know and they're like oh man let's just call someone we'll go to their house that's as far as opposites and then when it comes to your USB cable interface what do you think's better the same you want as much you want to hit as much of that as common as possible because that's where you spend the hours of your life you want to spend your hours of your life there and you want to be careful by the way whatever occupation she's going back to occupations whatever occupation you choose should not be a stretch for you you spend a lot of hours in your occupation and if you wind up stretching for all those hours it'll take its toll human beings have to be at peace with themselves there's nothing wrong with stretching but you got to celebrate and that's what will give you longevity and give you a happy life and a and a and be kind it'll be kinder to your whole system and you'll live longer and live healthier so you don't want to spend too much time out of your Zone except when necessary and it's necessary throughout the day you know you got to stretch but not for your full day occupation back to marriage sorry that was back a kind of a digression but back to marriage is you want to be interfaced with the person you marry and that means you want to get it as close as possible and you'll have to stretch you know I I really should stretch and learn a little Torah with my wife after the chunk that's a extreme though I that's impossible but it's just not possible I cannot keep my eyes open after that chilling I'm not going to drink a cup of coffee after the CH and who wants coffee without milk anyway so you want to if you're a one two3 you want to marry one 123 ideally you'll just love the time together you'll you'll always want to do the same stuff which is great you don't want to have a parallel life with your spouse want a life with your spouse not a separate life where you meet up some sometimes you know and I've seen plenty of marriages that they're always stretching and you see it you see they're always stretching he's a sports fanatic she's a socialite you know and there are girls who love sports and he could have married a girl who loves sports and been just spending so many hours together playing sports watching sports living Sports and then instead she you know rolls her eyes and says oh okay I'll escort you to the game you know and she has to sit through the game and she's the whole time texting with friends and like he's like you know look look you know they they're about to scor she's just like oh yeah that's nice it's you know it's irrelevant to her she wants to connect to people and you get that so you want as much you you can't always get it perfect but you want as much likeness as possible here and and ideally opposites here unless you're balanced which means you could go either direction flow or structure in a spouse clear but by taking whatever your style is and adding to it your USB interface you can really find what's your pocket how to live like right in the pocket of your life so that you're in the zone and I call this Finding Your Garden of Eden modality thank you very much