The Power of Holding Back | Rabbi Joey Haber

There's an incredible, incredible power or force that's in the moment. Let's try to explain. I'll be honest with you, I never in my life understood why someone ever would take drugs, or even smoke a cigarette. Statistics clearly say that if you smoke consistently, you lose ten years of your life. So is it worth it to lose ten years of seeing children or grandchildren or great grandchildren? Maybe 20 of your grandchildren get married in that time. It's worth it to give up ten years just for a five-minute cigarette? How does it make sense? The answer is the power of the moment. I need the cigarette now. I feel it now. And because I want it now, I can't think about when I'm 70. That's too far away. Drugs are the same. I never understood, why would anyone ever try drugs? Maybe you're going to enjoy it for a couple of years and then it's going to ruin the next 50 years of your life. Why would you do it? The answer is the power and the pull and the force of the moment. I'll give you another example. If I went over to someone who was very overweight and I said, I have a pill that will guarantee you to lose 50 pounds. Guarantee you, not some fake commercial you heard. Guarantee you lose 50 pounds. It costs $20,000. Would you do it? Anyone who could afford it would do it, for sure. $20,000 is all it costs, and I literally lose the weight and I look fit? I would for sure do it. So let me ask you a question. How come you get pulled by a 50-cent piece of cake? The answer is it's the moment. Right now, the power, the force of just wanting to eat that cake this second, I can't think about my future or anything else. I just want it now. You need to know that when you're pulled to see something, even though at that split second, the force feels very strong, it's just because that's what it feels like in the moment. The second you turn your head away and keep going, it doesn't feel like it took anything from you. So don't allow the moment to lie to you. Don't allow the moment to fool you. Don't allow the moment to tell you you need to. Because it's in the moment, it feels so much more forceful and so much more powerful than it actually is. So don't listen to it. Don't hear it. The core of all the greatness of a Torah life is in the ability to hold back. When you want everything that you hope for, everything you want to build in a Torah home, everything you want to build for you, your spouse, your children, all of your dreams basically boil down to your ability to hold back and not be pulled by the power and the force and the lie of the moment.