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The Halachos of The Three Weeks, Rabbi Yosef Yeshaya Braun 5785
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Transcript
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which are written in which every can get
a easily certainly has it. If he doesn't
have it, at least get it. And for sure
is that has a we assume that every does
exactly what it says and learns and
knows what to do. The was focusing on
those extra spiritual components of the
three weeks as we will touch upon some
of those things but we'll mainly focus
on the
we often use the expression when we talk
about making special good resolutions.
And we say if will be delayed when we
talk about spiritual behavior that we
need to increase our behavior during the
three weeks because we are engul and if
Mashia will be delayed we'll be doing
XYZ even after Mashia will come well
we'll still have to we'll continue our
and all of that.
So as mentioned we need to know the
actual
we need to know what's supposed to be
done so long is not here's the
associated with and mourning and the
says those who mourn about will merit
and be privileged to see the of the
mikdash but there's also a focus besides
focusing on that there's a focus on
learning about those aspects of that
talk about redemption and the third
mdash if we want to nullify and negate
and negate gulus destruction and exile
it's not so much about through
meditating about how terrible the exile
is but more focusing on how great the
gula the liberation is. We need to
awaken within ourselves a desire and a
yearning to gulah and therefore we'll
demand that we want to have gula and
that's how we'll bring about the gula
and then we'll see how the golas the
exile really was internally was really
all good will transform the darkness
into light
tells us that since
the negative aspects of destruction
already begun that's when it was a siege
that's when they broke through the wall
of therefore there's some level of
warning that starts already from the
beginning of three weeks
And because was unfortunately not built
yet, we need to think about the fact
that if it wasn't built, it's as if it
was destroyed. It's as if it was
destroyed nowadays. And if we just think
about it that the effect that that will
have on us is is enormous. Like the Neb
once said that we know that the explains
that the the destruction of the Bik is
not as if it's happened once. It's a
constant thing. It's not as if it
happened 2,000 years ago. We're
reflecting about the past. Every minute
the bis becoming redestroyed again. If
we would only think about that then even
if aid is has a heart made out of stone
when a person sees the actual bim going
up in flames and it affects him he would
make so much noise and such about that
we are right now focusing on that idea
that we don't have the b is being
destroyed in front of our eyes now that
can make a person fall into a person
could get depressed a person how can I
overcome all the difficulties all the
challenges but we know in the depths of
our heart that really the strong love of
hashem to yen is found in those three
weeks
specifically in the three weeks and the
nine days and in fact as an introduction
to the three weeks we have the of
is telling us really this month is
really a month associated with
positivity we just don't see it and if
everything that we do even when we talk
about the laws of morning we have to do
that with
one time the said in America we see
anything that we want people to
accomplish something you always have to
have a smile everything is with a smile
it's an American meaning we should adopt
that meaning so let me go through a
couple of the after all of that
introduction
One of the all the stuff's three weeks
are primarily min and not all circles
have that minig but it's been accepted
pretty much amongst most of one of them
accepted in kalis we don't take haircuts
in the three weeks haircuts refers to
hair of the head refers to any hair of
the body refers to men it refers to
women refers to children we don't give
haircuts to children too if there's if
there's an issue of that's a whole
different story a woman is allowed to
take a haircut if It's reasons in order
to be able to cover here properly for
reasons that she has to go to the mikvah
even if she has to go to the mikvah
after tishb but since there's a custom
that we don't cut our hair three days
before mikvah and she wants to cut her
ear before that's perfectly fine.
A woman is allowed to remove body hair
because she doesn't want to look ugly in
the front eyes of her husband for
purposes. A girl could remove somebody
here and this is even in the nine days
when we talk about not cutting hair that
includes eyebrows that includes mustache
the unless the part of the mustache that
affects the person's food it goes into
their mouth that's something different
that you're allowed to cut in the three
weeks a if someone has a lot of hair
long unckempt hair that's a problem and
that's a problem throughout the year
it's a one is allowed to and it's a
mitzvah to cut the hair during the three
weeks it is a should behave to have very
long hair. It could be a question of
the is not considered being worn
properly. He has a lot of hair and they
should cut it even during the 3 weeks. A
child that turns three in the 3 weeks,
we don't do his traditional upturn in
the 3 weeks. He push it off till after
until the day after midday. They see
that would be on a Monday. But all the
other beautiful hug associated with
turning three
making sure he
and all that that should be done in the
three weeks as well.
If a woman wants to fix her shel, cut
her shel short, that's not called
haircut. That's cutting a garment does
nothing to do with haircut. That's
perfectly fine at 3 weeks. I will
mention when I say that certain things
are fine at 3 weeks. That's 3 weeks.
That's not nine days. Well, believe try
to have a separate cheer about the nine
days. That's all associated in
connection with idea of haircuts. What
about getting married? So, we don't get
married in the 3 weeks. Even imagine if
someone wants to make a a wedding
without a meal. No, we don't do it in
three weeks. Even if somebody didn't
have kids yet, there's the very first
mitzvah in the mitzvah of having
multiply and having children. And in
order to fulfill the mitzvah of Puru,
one has to have at least one son and one
daughter. He didn't fulfill yet the
mitzvah. So he's pushing off this
mitzvah. No, not in the three weeks. The
primary reason is because
it's just not a good omen. It's not a
good doesn't have a positive sign to it
when we do a wedding in a time
associated with morning. But if a person
got married before the three weeks and
the she is continuing in the three weeks
then that would be fine. It's no longer
practical this year because we already
passed full week of the three weeks. But
if she may be made in three weeks as
long as no dancing and there's no music
as we'll talk in a moment about that if
you get engaged there's no such thing a
person can get engaged. It's so
important for a person to get engaged.
will do that anytime even on
maybe someone is going to be ahead of
you in the game. So do it at any time
get engaged even make in the three
weeks. In the nine days we shouldn't
make a proper meal. We should just serve
some some delicacy some some small food
finger food or whatever it is but not
make a proper full-fledged fancy meal
with but the general idea of having a
even making a small that's perfectly
fine in the three weeks and in the nine
days as well.
Moving on. One of them in hugam
associated.
Oh, sorry. There's one thing that I
missed out. I will mention um
electrolyosis
or laser woman wants to remove here of
her face. That's fine in the 3 weeks.
I'm going back a bit. I'm sorry I missed
that out before.
Next
in it says that writes it's good to be
careful not to say the three weeks on a
new suit on a new garment. What does it
mean not to say? means don't eat such a
fruit and don't wear such a garment. It
is indeed our we don't say the three
weeks even on Shabas because some people
have the custom that on Shabas they do
say and here's a bit of a distinction in
it is our custom that's not mentioned
but it is our custom that in we don't
say but that does not apply to Shabas
however
when it comes to the three weeks even on
Shabas we don't say and it has nothing
to do with a with morning we don't say
because of morning No, has nothing with
mourning and something with morning
because if it would be with mourning
then it wouldn't apply on Shabas. Shabas
ain't there's no sadness on Shabas.
There's no availance on Shabas. It has
to do with the fact that it doesn't make
sense to say
we've so been fortunate to reach at this
time when it's not such a beautiful
exciting time. So we don't engage in
even shabas even the person has a fruit
that they won't find after tish and they
have this fruit ready in their house and
you can't keep it until after
it'll get ruined for some reason even
keeping in the fridge won't work then
you allow it in the saying of course you
should make but if you could keep it at
least till shabas at least to diminish
the problem to minimize the problem wait
until shabas will stay fresh until
Shabas and make on Shabas is not that
serious because there are those that say
that you could make on Shabas and in
this case where you have no choice
you're going to miss out the mitzvah
because the fruit is ready in your hand
and otherwise the fruit will get ruined
if you wait till after 3 weeks so at
least do it on Shabas.
The same thing is if if you could f if
you'll have such a fruit after tishb
this particular fruit will get ruined.
Okay, at least you'll be able to catch
up and make the afterish. The person by
mistake ate a new fruit. He forgot us
the three weeks. He forgot us a new
fruit. He made
stuck. Now o meals is a new fruit. It's
a three weeks is what do you do now is
no in such a case you should eat the
fruit. So you have to make a if you're
going to be eating it, but taste a tiny
bit. If a person ate it already and
didn't make
then no, don't continue eating.
Stop eating. And after the 3 weeks,
you'll make and another fruit and you'll
have a mind in retroactively on the
fruit that you ate in the 3 weeks.
An exception to this rule is that a
woman that's expecting and she has a new
fruit, she's has a that she's allowed to
eat a new fruit and she should not make
for some reason we're concerned that
she'll have a craving to this fruit and
if she'll have a craving it's going to
affect her, it's going to affect the
fetus and we let her eat the fruit but
we tell her case is a bit of a different
case. Normally if you eat the food we
make also but a woman that's expecting
she's not eating it because of eating
the pleasure. She's eating because she
just has a craving and because of her
condition in s she eats it without a
with
a sick person that needs to eat this
particular fruit which is the new fruit.
So they'll eat the fruit in the three
weeks. Also as part of this of not
making they also developed a minute of
not buying or wearing new clothing
important dignified important clothing
in the three weeks even those that don't
make normally a new clothing. So it's
not they're not going to make him
anyhow. No they don't we don't buy new
clothing. It's a there's a associated
with buying a new clothing and we're not
trying to look for opportunities of
which are problematic according to if
there's a need that a person needs to
get something new whether for shabas
whether that's just not respectful the
hat that you're walking around with then
in such a case we allow a person to get
something in the 3 weeks at least if
it's before the nine days because the
nine days is much more serious getting
new clothing in the 3 weeks it's only a
minute best would be to get it on
credit. In other words, don't pay the
full amount of money if the store keeper
is okay with that. And the rest you'll
pay after tish. So it won't only
consider that you actually bought a new
garment.
This is all about clothing. There's no
meaning about not getting new dishes,
utensils, kale. It's only about new
clothing.
Unimportant clothing to begin with is
not a problem. You let it buy and wear
from
I'm not talking about from onwards.
undergarments, socks, new shoes, even
you might even buy a talis cotton
because a talis cotton is considered a
mitzvah. So again, the 3 weeks not a big
deal. Buying glasses, which is a
necessary thing to have, is fine. If
somebody
had a mazub and he had a daughter in the
3 weeks, so when a person has a new boy,
they make
for the good news that they had a new
boy. when a person has a girl. So upon
not on the news but upon seeing the girl
you make
on the first first time you see your
daughter. So if it's in the 3 weeks you
don't push that's the opportunity not to
make you'll make in the three weeks also
someone who's having a ben in the three
weeks part of the process is to make so
we'll do that in the three weeks. So
not to lose on not to miss out and this
is only the
to begin with was never a problem in the
three weeks. If a person has a new boy
has a child a boy then is not a problem
to begin with.
One of the other minhog associated with
three weeks is the meaning of which is
an old pim
and one is not allowed to dance
are two different types of dancing
whether dancing in a circle dancing one
person another person from armor there's
no dancing there's no singing there's no
sorry no playing instruments and no
listening to instruments including
instruments that are on a recording
where you're not hearing the instrument
live
the
in the magazine called the
so there was a c just a small amount of
about the three weeks so one of the
edited that section heavily
we don't listen to music in the three
weeks
so someone whose business his profession
is to play instruments and he's playing
for a nonju
who was allowed to listen to music
and he needs his parasa. So whatever he
needs for his paras and it's for a
nonjew this no problem for him to hear
it he's allowed to play instruments
until
from until after the says no you
shouldn't play even if it's for your
as well you also shouldn't play
instruments
now when it comes to
listening to what is the definition of
an instrument so we know there's a bunch
of instruments out there what if we have
we said that a recording of an
instrument is like an instrument why
you're listening to the recording ing
that is that became now the instrument.
The instrument doesn't have to be an
original instrument. It could be an
electronic instrument. It could be audio
instrument. So the recording is an
instrument. So what if you're listening
to a person singing to a singer without
a music on a recording? Is a recording a
tape a audio a video of a person
singing? Is that called also a form of
instrument? So some are very very
lenient when it comes to listening.
Since the original source is not an
instrument and we're listening now just
to a person singing, it's not a problem.
But there are those that say that's also
called
musical instruments. So there's
definitely room to be lenient with
listening to a singer with has where
there's no accompaniment of music. But
this today's day and age they make
professional
professional um tapes with it's people
singing but it sounds like instrument.
They call it a capella. Now that's a
very serious issue because even
listening to a person singing on a on a
recording is a big m but that's okay. In
many places they had a meaning
altogether they didn't sing in the
entire 3 weeks. Some people in the nine
days they just wouldn't sing. So to but
certainly to to override the spirit the
spirit of the law and have is something
that sounds mish totally like music and
can tell the difference that doesn't
make sense to do that in the three
weeks. A person is listening to very
slow neg which inspires dance. It's a
very slow The purpose is not the
music. The purpose you listen to who
usually has an old croaky voice. You're
not really interested in in the pleasure
of the music just purely to learn a
beautiful inspirational gag.
There is sometimes a bit of background
music and the background music is really
totally secondary. You hardly pay
attention. Every so often there's
another beat there. That's not really an
issue. It's not a problem when a person
is driving, especially driving for a
long time, especially when driving at
night. You're allowed to listen to
music. You should listen to music. It's
obligatory for you to listen to music.
That music is purely in order that you
should stay awake and not
fall asleep on the wheel. The idea of
not listening to music, I know for many
people this is the most important three
weeks. So, we'll talk about this a bit
more. That idea of not listening to
music applies to camps. It applies to
schools and applies to homes. Especially
our purpose of our camps is nor to train
children to have shim. A part of the
training of Shama is to train the
children that there's a period of time
that we sad because of the B mikdash. If
there's a camp with these little kids,
you need to calm them down. It's kids
are not yet the age of the purpose of
the music is just to put them to sleep
or whatever it is. That's a whole
different story. That the purpose of the
music plays a totally different purpose
over there. If somebody hired a music a
music teacher to teach his children
music and if they're learning music for
parasa
the children are learning music because
that's how they're going to earn a
living. So then they could do that even
the three weeks until
but the learning is just a pleasure not
for not let it do that is a thing that
even
is a general which a lot of people don't
know or never heard of or negligent that
we're not supposed to be playing
instruments from the time and there's a
lot of what people are lenient about
that it's a purely certainly the
purposes of so that being encouraged
putting out tapes
but I'm just putting this in context of
so when it comes once a year twice twice
a year. Three weeks is a time to be
careful and and and and and focus on the
fact that it is after all a time of time
of that. So we have to focus on
dancing music
is forbidden even in a mitzvah even if
even
that it's not a dispensation of being
able to hear music. It makes other
events audit. There's no and a lot of
times you realize that the the sim
itself is more than anything that's
accomp that comes with it. The music
does accomplish a lot but sometimes is a
sim itself. When it comes in three weeks
you focus on the itself and not on the
external aspects of
one other thing associated with three
weeks is the idea of being careful from
danger trips etc.
right
these days have a potential of causing
injury or harm to a person
there's there's a negative omen
associated with these days and therefore
we have to be careful of anything which
is a anything which is a concern of
danger during these three weeks
one of the examples mentioned how it's
actually found already in
one should be careful not to walk alone
during certain hours of the day from the
four end of the fourth hour of the day
until the end of the ninth hour of the
day. That's a time where there's certain
demons going around. I don't know what
kind of demons we're talking about. I've
never seen them unless they're
two-legged demons. No idea. But we have
to be particularly here during these
three weeks. Peter is the name based on
so a person has to be careful not to
walk alone, not to walk exactly between
where the sun is and the shade is. We're
when we talk about walking
It's such a place we're talking about
where there's no people around. If
there's people around then it's not
really a problem.
Trips during these days is not the
proper time for trips. One should cut
out minimize someone at least taking
walks and trips and things like that. A
person needs this for health. If it's
done as inspiring and encouraging people
for learning Torah, it's done in a
school in a camp. That's part of part of
what we're trying to inspire them to and
we give them a prize. That's a whole
different story.
say for
the
it says there that people used to take
walks from until
except with a small break in the three
weeks. The three weeks
they were indeed really sad days
they kept the meaning the three week
with all the with all the actual
details. So otherwise other than those
three weeks between people used to take
a
plat in the place where the big market
was people would enjoy the walk and
enjoy the
good summer
but the three weeks that's when they
wouldn't take these walks. So again
we're not talking about something
but was this understanding it's not the
regular walk time taking was not didn't
take place in the 3 weeks
you allow to go
and swim in a pool you allow to go in
the ocean until you have to be careful
anything which is a concernal danger and
therefore a lot of people try to avoid
going in rivers and oceans and and
washing themselves there the time of the
three weeks a person has to travel for
lengthy trip The Reb encouraged many
many times that they should try to make
preparations before the three weeks
begin for the trip even packing a couple
of starting off uh just a form of
preparation. So it'll be considered that
the trip started before
certainly well now the three weeks have
already begun but certainly if a person
is traveling for any for a mitzvah for
anything like that for that's not a it's
not a good idea to delay something like
that that shouldn't be pushed off that
should be done even in the 3 weeks.
people that need medical treatment,
medical procedures. If it's possible,
if at all possible, it is appropriate
that a complex medical procedure, we're
not talking about plain simple things,
but a complex medical pro procedure
should be pushed off to
similar to what it says in not to hit
students in the three weeks. It's not a
good idea all all year round, but it's 3
weeks because if it's a time of sak,
it's not a good time to hit children or
students. We'll get to that in a moment.
So certainly we shouldn't be taking one
shouldn't be taking complex med doing
complex medical procedures and as we
have the famous rule to anytime
something is delayed it's a good sign.
So if we're going to be delaying the
medical procedure after the nine days
that's at least if it can't be pushed
off till it should be done before. If
the doctor insists and says no no no it
has to be done. Okay. So we should try
to do it at least if possible before
which this year is the day before.
Certainly if we're told we should be
which is a matter of life and the
opposite of life and it has to be done
right away then we shouldn't push it off
at all. We got to what has to be done
has to be done. Regular normal routine
treatments which don't put a person into
a state of danger. dental treatments all
those kind of things are not a problem
at all to do in the nine days three
weeks etc.
When we have when we want to discipline
our children our students I just
mentioned that person say
try to rebuke them calmly in a relaxed
way
no not using force which is like we said
not a good idea all year round but
certainly not in the three weeks.
Moving on to the next topic. Buying
houses, moving apartments, renovating.
Some have not to buy a house in the
three weeks because
it's just not a good omen. It's not
something
then if you talk according to buy a
house to live in the 3 weeks, but it's
just not the best time cuz you're
looking for a positive sim when we buy a
house. So we wouldn't want to do that
under the three weeks especially if
somebody is in a situation where they
want to if they don't buy the house they
might not find a house someone else will
get the house before them
sure they should buy the house now and
they could do it even in the nine days
certainly if the registration the house
the the signing of the the the house is
only registering your name only after
but for sure there's no problem to begin
with there isn't meaning not to move
into this that's what we're talking
about buying buy a house moving into a
new house is a meaning not to move into
a new house in the 3 weeks even if we
don't say so it's best to push it off
after 3 weeks
if possible should be push
but again this is not how
a person's allowed to expand and their
property and and do renovations
expand their property these in the three
weeks and make that bigger until it is
some people do have a main they don't
build in the three weeks because they
look at it again as not a positive omen
if somebody began building before the
three weeks you continue and there's no
allowed to it's a custom which is not
brought in in some people have such a
light renovations for sure is not a
problem painting it says that it's not
appropriate for a person to paint their
house throughout the three weeks if
however a person already made up has a
construct is going to be painting their
This is coming pay and he already
made up a price saying already started.
Not letting him finish is not a problem.
Same with
a person already has a house. House has
already been he already moved into the
house. He already painted the house but
they want to make a celebration. Not the
right time to do a looking for a good
time a good
a time not
and not during the three weeks. There's
a number of that the Reb instructions
that the Reba publicized specifically
for the three weeks and I want to share
them with you and the Reb asked for this
to be publicized at large.
First of all, in the days of the three
weeks, we should increase in mishb and
will be redeemed with we should increase
now. Mishb means learning particularly
learning the three weeks which we're
doing that right now and we should also
increase in sodaka and giving extra
sodak. So during the three weeks we feel
this need to push it bothers the person
I got to do something because something
extra more than anyone will do extra
extra
in the three weeks itself
excuse me every period in the three
weeks we move to the next period which
makes it which is a more severe period
we add even more so there's a three
weeks until
we add even more
from we add even more the week of even
more of
But like I mentioned this year, the week
of isb itself
comes to
which this year is going to be in a
Friday. We should increase especially in
and fill in the asks we should give the
amount of money that it cost us to have
two meals. Two meals is the minimum of a
normal person eats a day. Would be best
if we increase and give the amount for
three meals because over here people eat
normally three meals a day. And we
should make the decision about this
before the three weeks begin. We should
already decide that when it comes we're
going to give money the amount of food
that the amount that it cost us to have
three meals a day. If a person didn't
manage to make this decision before the
3 weeks it's already now the three
weeks. So make the as soon as possible
the earlier the better
and in moment every moment early you do
that just itself because we have even
the itself by Hashem is considered as if
we already did it. So once we decided we
already have that extra mitzvah
and whoever didn't do it any of these
any of these instructions if you didn't
do it in the right time so make it up
afterwards.
Another thing about the three weeks we
should put an extra effort in all the
having a house full of
extra effort
that often the spoke about is that we
should try to get rid of the reason of
the cause which brought about gullus.
came about because of people hated each
other for no good reason. We should
increase in the opposite of
not only loving one another but feeling
like one in a way of even if there's
really absolutely no reason to love the
person.
So if we get rid of the cause the effect
we don't we no longer have the effect.
If we is no longer sin is then we have
we as part of this we should make sure
that we do within
all the things the more we do the is
better our today is has a new focus it
we used to say that is to get rid of the
cause of gullis gul came about cause of
hatred so we're going to get rid of the
hatred and therefore have is now the
cause of gul is already gone we had so
much obvious now we're standing on the
threshold of gulah the spoke I believe
was
now focus on the more as a taste of gula
we're already entering into gula getting
used to the idea of gula start to have a
taste of of the way we'll feel in the
time of gul the time of good there won't
be any k of attack no jealousy no
competition we'll feel a tremendous act
and a beyond any division they won't be
felt noticeable any division between one
and another.
We're already having a taste of that.
Now, that's what should be our focus on.
And of course, when we talk about the
three weeks is the idea that during the
three weeks, we should learn about the
Bikdash which is something relevant to
men and it's also relevant to women and
relevant to children.
when he was told
how the third mish will look like he
said why am I teaching people when
they're going into golas why am I
teaching them all about their own gulas
why am I teaching them what the third
will be like so hashem said because my
children are in golus they we my the
building of my house will be put aside
teach them about the m let them learn
about it when they learn about it as if
they're actually building it we want to
bring about the building b we should
actually start learning about it and now
that we're in the threshold of ga also
the learning is in a total different
way.
It's not as if we're learning because we
feel sad. We have such a strong feeling
of a we want to fix up the the the
shortcoming that which is missing.
So we learn to make up for that. No, we
are learning because not only to get to
fix up the problem, but now because we
have such a strong desire a
such a yearning to the advantage of the
third even if there would still be the
second and there wouldn't be a we we
would say yeah but we want to have
something even more than the second we
want to have the third. So now we're
learning not because of the but because
we want to have the mile of the third
and of course nowadays when we learnd
it's also not in a way
for the future will come it's going to
be relevant the very next moment. So we
learn in such a way that with a
knowledge and understanding is with
absolute certainty that this is going to
be relevant immediately
in the three weeks
once made
of and he said that make in the three
weeks
I was worked very hard to find for
myself a an exc a dispensation why it's
okay for me
And I found the best that I found that
says that people need to play music for
their Allah play music in the three
weeks. No my says to so he found since
he really wanted
before the nine days come in to give
that boost of and tell us to encourage
us how we should add in our to bring. So
therefore he found a generally the ask
we should find any opportunity we can
make a fab in a way that it's find the
do when it's connected with
something else turn into
I said I will focus a bit in the of the
nine days
but there's one of the nine days which
is relevant before the nine days in the
nine days we don't wear freshly
laundered clothing
except for
undergarments which a general custom is
that people are lenient about that.
There's not not everybody agrees with
that. But the general custom is that
people are lenient with undergarments,
socks and things like that.
If so, you don't put on any freshly
laundered garments in the nine days. If
however you wore it once before the nine
days, then you're not going to wear it
in the nine days because the sim that a
person has is when they wear only the
first time. So therefore, the nine days
are coming up and we're planning as if
we're going to be in G. So what states
are people find themselves in a hot
place? It's extremely hot, a lot of
sweat. They need to change their shorts.
What do they do when they can't put on
freshly loaded clothing? So you wear the
same shirt for nine days. So the pis say
that before the nine days put on a bunch
of garments before for a short while. So
now it's considered non fleshly
laundered clothing. This applies not
only to adults, applies to children,
women and children too. Once a person, a
child reaches the age that they know
what it means to mourn your
unfortunately a lot of adults don't know
that either.
Pet is already the age of not just
making but it's the older age of where a
person could appreciate the idea of
sadness and mourning then they should be
taught the idea that we don't refresh
any longer clothing and they could
prepare for these clothing before the
nine days which is on of a Friday.
So one should prepare these clothing by
putting them on.
Ideally we should a lot of can say you
should have put on a bunch of clothing
one on top of each other
because the idea is to feel like you
actually were you put 10 shirts one on
top of each other you don't really it
doesn't lose its new newness freshly
laundered kind of feeling. If for some
reason if you did it that way and it's
it it just loses its freshness then it's
okay.
How much time do you wear it? you wear a
significant amount of time, then it no
longer has that feeling of something
new.
Another way of of defining that is if a
normal a normal person would mind if
someone else puts it on for that amount
of time. Person puts it on for a second
most people. I'll wear it now. But if a
person was wearing it for a while, hard
to give a number, it's less than an
hour.
Doesn't say price to give a number. I
would say it's probably more like 20
minutes, half an hour depending on the
garment and depending on the person.
If a person put on a garment right
before the nine days and it came
and he only wore it for a second, he
doesn't have to take it off. But if a
person put on in the nine days a newly
freshly laundered garment, you don't
have to remove it. Once you put it on,
he put it on, he can keep it on.
If a person didn't prepare before the
nine days their clothing. So some are
lean. It's not the ideal thing but some
are lean if you're stuck to put it on
the ground. The ground does not mean on
the floor. Put it on the real ground
earthly floor proper ground. Then it's
considered if it's no longer fresh but
that's the second choice. Ideally want
to put it on before the nine days.
Another it that people give for someone
that didn't manage to change their
clothing before the nine days is to give
it to a
have the lot where almost all the that
we keep the entire nine days a lot of
the is only the week of which this year
the week of is itself so there's no such
thing as nine days for them this year
because they don't have the week of tish
which is only itself if you give it to
that he should wear okay so it's now the
worshkazi
in the nine days now for the Ashkanazi
go wear it also
talking about the nine days the says
that when the month of comes in we
decrease in
but
is limited we don't decrease in
everything there certainly that imply
even in the month of
is something that has to be at all times
even in the month of we have the mitzvah
of
serving hashem with happiness
minimizing that certain things it says
certain things we're supposed to act in
a nons
because of this
doesn't apply across the board
isn't a place of happiness
where Hashem is this happiness. So if we
want to make a place for Hashem then we
need to have happiness because otherwise
it can't be a place for hem is always in
the place of happiness. And that's why
even at the time that it says we
decrease in we always still have to have
a limit a limit a certain a measure
because since we always have to make a
dwelling place for hashem at every
single moment the entire goal of a
person in this world is
to make a this world and a person's
mission in life we were only created to
serve hashem so at every single moment
we have to be happy because that's how
make a dwell place for hashem And even
though we say that at sometimes we have
to act the opposite of which is of that
to remove the idea
because we were in exile. So that's not
how we make to Hashem. Don't forget
we're not going to make a dwelling place
for Hashem through the morning.
That's to prepare for the apartment.
We're making a dwelling place for
Hashem. The dwelling place for Hashem to
preparation stuff. We need to do other
things too. the actual dwelling place
happens through and that's why was so
not so particular not so they didn't go
out of their way in doing
because the the minimizing happiness is
a secondary thing in ourem
and that's why like we said it's limited
that we always have to have
number one even in a time when we
decrease we still have to have and two
the idea of not having is not the focus
that's not the
so there are those that are very very
and they get very why we're demanding
people to have for some reason even
before the month of of starts already
saying well it's already almost the
month of we already had so you still
have time it could be 25 36 hours till
the month of and even when it comes the
month of it's also only what does mean
when we contrast it with the
when we contrast it with the that will
be when comes So compared to that the
month of has less but of course we have
there's a which is not the but mentioned
it several times that
mentioned primarily in the name of the
instead of interpreting the literal
meaning we minimize our we minimize and
cut down on all the negative things. You
know how you'll cut on all the negative
things through doing when we focus on
doing that will cut on all the negative
things and it's actually mentioned in in
conjunction with
meaning the not having is the same idea
of having extra
because the purpose of of minimizing the
month of is in order to transform the
darkness into light transform the
bitterness into sweetness. So it's
ultimately the same purpose as we
increase. Now obviously we're not
talking about in a way that's not
permissible. We're talking about a way
that allows us to have we can have
through
makes our gladdens our heart
is
make us have makes
to the poor person literal
making during the nine days that's
perfectly permissible making
hearing every single place every single
day we make a down and that makesove so
that's just introduction
the spirit of the nine days.
The week of is when starts selling
things that are
from the to the basic things that
forbidden the week of some things are
forbidden in the week of only
and our meaning is a lot of the things
that are problematic in the week of
tishb already start from the beginning
of the month
which is why like I said you'll find
people that don't know of special manhag
for the nine days because they don't
follow
and they keep only these menhagim or
these
in the it only mentions the week of and
as mentioned a number of times tonight
already that during this year this year
we don't have the week of is the week of
when I say the nine days what does the
nine days mean the nine days mean from
sunset the
until the we actually continue start
from sunset and we continue the nine
days until the 10th of until midday
one of the things that is mentioned in
this case it actually says
from the beginning of not the week of
from the beginning of the month of has a
court case a legal issue with he should
try to avoid this legal issue in the
month of he should try to wait until
the month of it's not a good time to be
involved in a legal issue with dispute
with a guy because it's not a good masle
it's unhealthy masle the month of is mas
has a healthy masle and the month of
Today a Muslim has a no good Muslim. So
keep away from interacting with a
non-Jew cuz he might win the court case.
If you can't push it off to at least
push it off to
one of the things in the month of we do
different than other months is that we
don't do before
because it's a time of a time of warning
is considered receiving the we only
receive
a state of happiness. So we don't do the
the
we leave the kishana until is an
appropriate time to do kishana. That's
when it says that mashia was born on
and because it's called
mashia's name is and and he was born in
the month of on the day of and to
recognize the idea of the birth of
mashia. So wait without until then
there's another explanation because the
the
is considered the
it's considered the defect of the moon
compared to the moon and that's
considered the defect and only after the
when it's after do we have the idea of
we'll mention a few about the nine days
but primarily that will be in the next
mention something that we don't
We cut out on business.
We don't see nowadays people should
follow this because today most business
that we do is consider it's just
considered paras. It's not just business
for luxury. And because everything is
considered today
see we don't have this idea of cutting
out of business in the nine days.
Otherwise, when we're talking about
buying,
one should avoid buying silver dishes,
nice expensive
furniture, things like that, spoons,
plates, things they need for the house
is not a problem. But clay,
precious, exciting things, including
even a car or or a washing machine or a
dry, which you don't need. If it's a car
for and it's not a problem because if
that has to do with the idea that we cut
out of business with nowadays and we
don't cut out of business but otherwise
you shouldn't buy these or things except
for regular stuff things that are not so
urgent could wait until you go to the
store and find out the price it's not a
problem. So if a person bought new
furniture
by the way and this idea is even even if
we don't say it it's still part of the
if you bought new furniture before the
nine days and the furniture arrived in
the nine days. So try not to bring them
to your house at least try not to use it
until after
you seat above the 10th above
when it comes to to clothing.
So we mentioned about a minute in the
three weeks but that was purely a
minute. When it comes to the nine days
it's a much more serious issue of buying
or doing clothing in this case even not
important clothing is included in it.
New shoes shouldn't be bought in the
nine days. Even if there's a sale, even
if there's a loss, even if you're
planning to leave it and not put it on
until after tishb it, it it it shouldn't
be bought in the nine days
is okay. NF is done for a mitzvah, a
talis and a talis cotton
even though it's done only for the
mitzvah, but they are considered
garments and therefore you're not
supposed to buy a tal. So earlier I
mentioned earlier in the year that
buying in the three weeks it's okay to
buy a new talis a new talis but that's
in the three weeks it's not considered a
garment it's very not in the context of
the three weeks it's not so serious when
it comes to the nine days is a thing
that we don't buy new garments fill in
is okay is not considered a garment in
that context but a talis and tal cotton
should not be bought in the nine days
tishbuff shoes if a person doesn't have
any other tishbuff shoes they only have
regular leather shoes and they need to
wear tish sneakers listen to buy them
for the very first time in the nine days
on because they don't have anything
else. That's fine. I'm talking only
about buying. We're not talking about
sending gifts. Sending gifts. You send a
gift to someone in the nine days. The
problem of sending gifts is only on
itself.
There's a few details here about this of
buying stuff in the nine days. First of
all,
you want to order furniture, that's
fine.
ordering furniture and the delivery is
only going to come after tishb that's
not really considered a sim he didn't
really do any purchasing that's not
really a problem
secondly
glasses I mentioned all kind of clothing
glasses like an in between thing in the
3 weeks you said it's okay to buy
glasses but in the nine days you should
avoid buying glasses unless you really
need glasses so it depends the glasses
you know there's different kind of
glasses there's glasses that you need
glasses that looks beautiful could you
fix your glasses is there a new frame
frame is new lenses. So, this is what
the type of thing that we should really
try to avoid doing in the nine days. For
kids, there's room to be lean into
buying little kids clothing until they
turn six, at least if it's not in the
week of
when we mention that if it's a special
sale,
then even so, you shouldn't be buying
clothing in the nine days. If there's an
exceptional unusual crazy sale and the
sale finishes before the nine days are
over and you would buy this garment even
if there wouldn't be a sale and it's a
really unusual sale and you're not going
to be wearing the garment till after
then there's room to be lenient until
the week of tishb because of this
absolute ridiculous sale but again don't
wear the garment until after don't even
wear it on shabas certainly if you won't
be able to find this garment ever again
of course you could be lenient best
would be that you to pay for the garment
before the and don't use it
don't use it until after people that are
getting married after
really they should wait and not buy
clothing until after tishb sometimes if
a person is going to wait until after
maybe it won't come a time for the again
that's a case it could be lenant
a kid that turned three and you need to
buy him a new pair of tal that's a whole
different story you buy him yamaka Of
course, ideally you should get him to
wear tits already before and you won't
have any other problem. They said with
someone who's talis ripped, you can't
borrow a talis from someone else.
There's no one to borrow a talis or he's
extremely hyper sensitive and he can't
wear someone else's talis. That case is
an exception to the rule. He's allowed
to buy a brand of talis.
Another about the nine days is the idea
of
says
In the beginning of the month of we
minimize
building something associated with
happiness what's considered a associated
with
fancy stuff drawings paintings engraving
things we take that to being practically
that's what it says in the what does it
mean any building that you don't really
need for living you're doing it only
what we call
just for extra for luxury so a person
has a house. He could live there. He
just wants to make the sides bigger,
wants to make it bigger, higher, taller.
That's a problem. Person has a small
house
and he he wants to make it bigger and
now he started demolishing it. Now you
can't live there and he's stuck and it
was raining. Yeah. Okay, that's a
different story. Then he's allowed to
build even after we usually wait after Z
of but it's much more monts
will get ruined. That's again that's a
different story. But here we're talking
about the idea where a person doesn't
really need a bill. It's just for
luxury. Painting is forbidden from
wallpaper on the walls should not be
done on on who does that these days for
beauty should not be done from
hanging a picture. Hang a picture not
called building. Some people have a
meaning they don't even wash the floor
in the nine days. I'm not sure if it
applies to house which is full of
children.
Certainly if it's dirty is no problem
but polishing a floor that's already a
that's extra pleasure there's really no
need for it that's similar to what it
says se fancy stuff fancy stuff we don't
do in the nine days so polishing the
floor shouldn't be done the same washing
a car unless the car is extremely dirty
washing a car is already considered a
tanuk an extra pleasure and that should
not be done in the nine days buying a
new carpet No, we shouldn't buy or put
down a new carpet in the nine days. When
we talk about not building in the nine
days, that means even flew a But if
a person hired a before the and the
go is a contractor and he's already on
the job. So now the is working for
himself. The difference between a
contractor and a day worker is a
contractor gets paid a set amount. You
don't pay him per hour. When you pay him
per hour, that means he's working for
me. When you pay him for the job, now
he's working for himself. So once you
hire him before and he's a contractor
then he's allowed to continue working
even on the same thing if the guy's
painting but when it comes to painting
the price can say
if you can go and and appease him giving
something small give you a few dollars
just wait
person that will have a this is the
which is something which is beauty it's
not building so there's building extra
something which is not necess
which is a smaller problem of painting
which is considered a luxury over there
we say it's better to give the go wait
until after the person's in building so
he's allowed to build or paint even a
go's house these days allowed to be
built is allowed to be painted a micro
fence which is for sak reasons to
protect from danger is allowed to be
done even on tishb's
wall is going to fall down even if it's
not a sak but it might lose money and it
might have sim attached to still build
it. You're not doing it for for simp
beauty, flowers, all those things should
not be planted in the nine days. If you
already planted, you want to water it,
that's perfectly fine. You're allowed to
buy flowers in in the nine days
chabas. A person knows that every single
chabas he wants to buy flowers, that's
perfectly fine.
We spoke earlier about
making in the nine days
and we said getting engaged is perfectly
fine in the three weeks and in the nine
days and making but a suda was a
problem. Getting engaged is something
better at all times you should encourage
people getting engaged. So if we all
make a suda even if it's on shabas you
do a small thing. Now
making a a sudas a party where friends
are getting together is a problem in the
nine days. A lot of people don't know
about this. It's a problem to make a a
sudas, a get together, a party for
friends, a birthday party which doesn't
involve a suda. It's just a it's an
event. You know, there's some nash a
potato chips not a suda. That's okay.
Especially if little kids, even friends
getting together, but it's not a full
proper suda. That's not a problem in the
nine days. It says inkim that if a
person a miracle happened to a person he
should make sure the day that a miracle
happened to them every single year he
should get together with friends. Think
of first of all himself between him and
Hashem and thank but get together with
friends make a suda talk about the nest
and show happiness. So what happens if
this happened to someone he had a nest
happened to him in the past and it
happened in the nine days. So his
sitting alone and thanking that should
be done that day.
another thing we spoke earlier about not
making a special
in the three weeks we said because it's
not a good omen to do in the three weeks
but that was only a minute when it comes
to it's actually even if you're not
going to be serving me and wine this is
part of the making a special event for
the consecration of the home a suda for
the consecration of home that's a
problem
in the nine days also there's many that
we have to talk about about washing
clothing about freshly laundered
clothing is associated we're going to
talk about the shabas associated with
eating meat drinking wine cutting nails
taking showers that they plan to do all
these in in the followup we talk about
we'll talk about sewing clothing also
but at this stage I do want to mention
is basically about to be finished about
the idea of in the nine days asked that
we should publicize all over the meaning
of making in the nine days and Since is
a continuation to we should continue
until including including making and by
the way this year the three chapters
they include learning of in the nine
days. The reason for is we should add to
a permissible way to do when we do we
negate things that are the opposite of
when we make a we make a on the golus we
make not that we try to get rid of golus
no we want to finish golas finish golus
means we take golus and turn to gula by
putting the alf into ga and it becomes
gola and this should be done in with
many people there which have men women
obviously not together with children. We
get together we hear the person see him
and then a suda is made and it's a
beautiful thing of and we try to connect
every one of these human with the idea
of shabas you give spiritual say nice
word to someone after
so it's good by the time before the
middle of people should put money and if
you can make a withan
this is not about eating meat and wine
we'll talk to it's about the idea that
it's okay to eat meat and wine on
certain occasions could include too
under certain conditions. But the idea
of him making is just to increase in the
would make in the nine days even though
he didn't eat meat or drink wine.
So and if a person can't really hear
directly being in the place where the is
made you can hear a seim over the radio
over the phone you can hear through
other technology methods and that's also
considered being part of the sin. So
it's important I'm just mentioning this
before we start the nine days just to
encourage the idea of making those
hearing and putting it as part of your
program and that all these nine days
should be transformed that's nine days
the week of the three weeks should all
be transformed we should see the true
that the m of the narrowness is really
part of the of the broadness of
taken