The Extraordinary Story of Rachav, Yehoshua & the Spies

The Yeshiva.net It's a great opportunity for this Yeshiva to host Y Y Jacobson world renowned he doesn't need introductions. His Shiurim lead the way of his Torah. He spans all spectrums spans all crowds and he brings clients all together in one cohesive unit. And I think this uh really brings together the mission of this Yeshiva to empower a generation to become their better selves to Jewish men and women and to actualize the greatest Torah learning potential. I'd like to thank today's sponsors. The learning has been sponsored today by Mr. and Mrs. Malkiel and Tova Nachumkin in nishmas his mother on her yahrzeit today Rivka Rivka Leah bas Reb Avraham ben Shmuel Sholom ben Aryeh. And the Shiur has specifically been sponsored by a few donors, Dr. and Mrs. and Dr. and Mrs. Elan and Debbie Elan and Debbie Wizansky and two other anonymous donors. It's dedicated l'ilui nishmas our dear friend Reb Binyamin ben Yisrael Chaim ben Chanina z'l. Should have a refuah shleimah u'vizut kol Yisrael. Without any further ado and as well as Reb Dovid Chaim ben Tzvi ben Tzvi ben Dovid. Okay. Thank you so much. Reb Shmuel ben Reb Zalman it's an honor to be in your presence. One of the builders or the builder of the Passaic Jewish community. So thank you and thank you for this z'chus the privilege and invitation to be here in such an incredible environment greeting the Yeshiva from all of you who uh I know that the uniqueness of this Yeshiva is the people who work become transformed and immersed in Torah. So, today what I want to do with you is take a a topic that's connected to this week this parashah the haftarah actually of this parashah and explore it from different perspectives and then try to bring it home and make it relevant to each of our lives. So, you gave out the source sheets. Yeah, okay. Okay, so we're going to begin with source sheet number two. Page two of the source sheets. The second paragraph we see says Sukkah Kuf Tazayin Amud Bet. If you don't have it, that's fine. I'll read it. But, if you have it, it'll be nice to follow inside. This is a few lines from a Gemara in Zevachim of Kuf Tazayin, page 116. And um let me just give context before we see inside. Everybody knows that parashah Shelach deals with a fascinating and tragic story of Moshe sending 12 miraglim 12 spies to scout the land. What was supposed to be a promising moment and a moment that contained great potential for a bright future turns disastrous because these 12, most of them, 10 of them come back and dissuade the entire nation from entering into the promised land and the great promise becomes a national panic, national hysteria. Vayivku ha'am. They weep, let's just go back to Egypt and die there or at least live as slaves rather than die by the swords of the giants and the mighty armies of the tribes of Canaan. As a result, they would remain in the desert for 40 years. What's interesting is that after 40 years are over, Moshe Rabbeinu passes away. Yehoshua bin Nun now succeeded him as the new Jewish leader. They're about to enter into the land of Eretz Yisrael 1 month after Moshe's death. And this is where Devarim finishes and Sefer Yehoshua begins. To all of our surprise, Yehoshua decides to repeat to repeat the story. And that's where the Haftarah takes over. The beginning of the Haftarah is chapter 2 of Yehoshua. Chapter 1 deals with Moshe's death and Yehoshua assuming the throne, assuming the position of leadership. Chapter 2 of Yehoshua, Joshua, is Vayishlah Yehoshua bin Nun min HaShitim shnayim anashim meraglim L'Yerushalayim. Yehoshua sends from the place called Shitim, not 12 spies, but he sends two spies. And he wants them to go survey the land, u'l'churu et Ha'aretz v'et Yericho. I'm quoting the opening of perek bet, chapter 2 of Yehoshua, which is going to be read the Haftarah of this Shabbat. And that's what they do. Vayeilchu. And the Torah says, Vayavo Yehoshua says, Vayeilchu vayavoyu beit ishah zonah. They come to the home of a woman, ishah, beit ishah zonah, a woman who the Tanakh defines as a zonah. We'll soon see what that means. U'shmah Rachav, her name is Rachav. Vayishkavu shamah, that's where they lay down to rest their bodies. That's the opening of the story of Yehoshua sending two spies. There's two very curious things in this opening pasuk. First of all, he sends meraglim cheresh. Cheresh in Lashon Kodesh means deaf, mute. He sent two deaf, mute spies. Is that what we're supposed to understand? Spies who can't speak to anybody and can't hear what's going on. They could see. Very strange expression. What does cheresh mean? We'll get to that. The next thing is, from all the places they decide to stay, it's beit ishah zonah, the home of a woman who's a Zoyna, which Zoyna usually denotes obviously someone of ill repute involved in promiscuity. Another very strange thing to stay in that home. The story continues that the king of Jericho, the king of Yirecha hears the news. I don't know who sent it out on WhatsApp, but somehow how he heard the news, or he had Ruach Hakodesh. Somebody saw them come in, somebody saw them go out. There was somebody watching everybody walk through the house. Doesn't say, but you got to figure that out on your own. But I guess every generation has its version of WhatsApp. It's just It's just expressed in different ways. You know, the old anecdote, they say that the British were bragging that they were digging and they found wires and they realized that 300 years ago they already had in Britain some telephone lines. So, the Israelis responded that they dug in Sfas and they didn't find any wires, which means 3,000 years ago they already had wireless. So, you see it here clearly. I just realized the source. Vayomer Lamelech Yirecha Lemar, the king of Jericho found out that Jews came Lachpor. Lachpor means to excavate, to discover the secrets of the land. He sends a message to Rachav, "Give us the people. Give us the men because they're not innocent. They didn't just come for a nice dinner and a nice slough or whatever else they want to do. They came for the reason of undermining and conquering the land." What happens now? She takes two men, the two men, we don't know their names from the Haftorah. It just says two people, not like the Chumash Shlach where we know exactly who these spies were. And Vatispinay, she hides him. Another strange expression, it should have been she hides them, she hides him. And she says to the king, yes they came, they came. I don't know where they are. They came and they left. We all know the story that she took them to the roof. The tit men named the pistey eights. She hides them among branches of flax. Piston pistey eights is plants of flax that she had there. She hides them among those. The plants on the flax on the roof. In the meantime the king sent out messengers to pursue them because she said they already left the home. She came up to the roof. She says, I know that Hashem has given you the land. Everyone is in awe of you and everybody has melted in this land before you. We heard what has happened throughout the last 40 years. Nobody has any more ruach in them in your presence. Nobody has any more ruach. Nobody has spirit. Nobody has energy. Nobody has stamina because of their awe and reverence from you and your God. What happens next? She takes a rope and with a rope she lowers them outside of her window because the wall of her home was the fortress of Yeriha. The back wall of her home was the hayma. Her home so to speak came out of the wall. So she lowers them from her window. She lowers them down on the other side of the wall. So now they are outside of the city of Yeriha. And she says, go to the mountain, hide for three days, they'll stop searching for you and then you'll go back home. That's when they make a commitment that when they come she will be completely safe and secure. They will not lay a finger on her and her family whoever is in that home. They come down from the mountain, they travel they stay 3 days, they hide, they travel back to Yeshua, and they tell Yeshua, "God has given us the land, and everyone living in that land, their hearts are melted." That's the end of the story. And then Yeshua and the Jewish people enter into Eretz Yisrael. Now that we have this context, let's see the commentary of the Gemara. Says the Gemara, and I quote, tells the messengers of Yeshua, verse 10 of chapter 2, "We have heard that Hashem dried the waters of the Red Sea." The Gemara now asks a question comparing two Yeshua periods, hey, Yeshua period base, but we want to focus on this story. What did Rahab mean when she says, "Nobody has any more ruach?" There's no ruach standing in any man. Says the Gemara, it's a very strange explanation, da'afilu achshuya nami lo achshuya. They absolutely have no energy. Even the normal process of a human organism during intimacy is gone. These people have lost it. Their energy is depleted. We know yada. How did she know? How could she make a statement that everybody in this country IS OVERWHELMED? EVERYBODY IS STARTLED. NOBODY HAS ANY MORE like kama ruach ba'ish. Nobody has any more masculine vigor. How does she know? The Am Yisrael, the master has taught, Ailu chakal sarim noge'ah le'var, Rahab ozair. Wow. There was not a sack, there was not a minister or a nugget, a man of prominence, of renown, of influence, of affluence in the land of Canaan who did not have relations with Rahab. And the Gamara explains Amru Rahab was 10 years old when the Jews left Egypt. The zone circle men show me show me show me men. 40 years Jews in the desert, she was involved in promiscuity. Achanun Shana at the age of 50 Miss Guyver. She converts to Judaism. Amra she says, "Yeah, he mock only." May I be forgiven the scar have a local Christian for the reward of the rope, the window, and the flax. Rahab is 10 years old when the Jews leave Egypt. So, now she's because they were in the wilderness 40 years. 40 years from the age of 10, she's involved in promiscuity. She's running this motel at the entrance to Canaan and everybody is visiting her. Ain the coast of She knows every important person, every interesting person, every charming person, every powerful person in the land. So, she could speak about the mood of the people. She knows everyone lost their stamina. Everybody lost their virginity. At the age of 50 after this encounter, she converts. And she asks for forgiveness. Says Rashi, "What does it mean forgive me for the rope, for the flax, for the windows?" Ask Rashi, "The mechilta Tanya Hava." This is what the mechilta says, one of the midrash. Rahab said, "I sinned through three ways. The Gamaliel marker, let me then be forgiven through three ways. Heaven, a rope, piston, flax, covering a window. Menachem, all adulterers used to do it in secrecy. They were married or whatever the issue was, they did it in secrecy. So, what would they do? She had a rope, she would bring them up through the window so nobody saw them walk in or walk out. When they finished, she let them go down out the window so nobody saw them leave just like nobody saw them come in. And she also, if necessary, hid them among the piles of flax that she had on her roof. So, for her sin, 40 years, she used a rope, she used a window to be able to get them in and out, and she used the flax. And now with these three methods, she saves the shluchim, the emissaries of Yehoshua, the two people who came from Yehoshua. Again, hiding them among the flax so nobody saw them, using the rope, getting them out the window, and thus saving their lives and sending them back to their master Yehoshua. That's the Gemara in Sukkah. Now, let's try to peer into what our chazal, what the chachamim here are teaching us about the story. Rachav apparently was the most well-connected person in Eretz Yisrael, right? That's what the Gemara clearly says. And that's why when they met her, they didn't have to go anywhere else. She was the person who could give them all the news. She somehow personified, as they would say, the zeitgeist. Anybody still knows what that word means? The zeitgeist of Eretz Canaan, she got it, she encapsulated it, she understood it. Fine. There's another Gemara in Megillah which complements this Gemara. The Gemara says in Megillah daf tes vav, arba noshim yif- yifiyos hayu ba'olam. Sarah, Abigail, Rachav, and Esther. Four of the most beautiful women in the world were Sarah, Abigail, who encounters David Hamalech later in the Tanakh, Esther of the queen from the Megillah, and finally, Rachav. To the point that the Gemara says in Taanis daf ches alef, Yitzchak said, kol ha'omer Rachav Rachav, miyad nikri. The name of Rachav was so powerful that it would create an immediate reaction. So, Reb Nachman says, I say Rachav and nothing happens. So, Reb Yitzchak says, no. Beyoda umakira klamin, if you know her. Just say the live a thousands of thou- 2,000 years later, say Rachav, that's not an issue. IF YOU KNEW RACHAV, if you recognized Rachav, just saying the name triggered an incredible incredible response. And then, after 50 years, she converts. Why? Cuz she met these two people. What happens? What did they tell her? It seems like she knew they came to spy, she didn't want her family to be killed, she helped them. What happened? What happened? Rashi says she wants to be forgiven for these three things. What is the meaning of this? These three things. Why do these three factors become so significant? Yes, she used a window, she used a rope, she used flax. Okay, those were technical instruments she used. Somehow that becomes the focus of the story. I mean, she could tell God, "Forgive me, I saved the Jewish lacham. Forgive me for everything I have done. No. No, no, no. It's the flax AND IT'S THE WINDOW AND it's the rope that I used AND NOW I USED it after 40 years I finally used it once FOR A GOOD THING. IT'S ALL FORGIVEN. REALLY? HOW DOES THAT work exactly? You want to do chuvah? Do chuvah and say I want to do chuvah, forgive me. I've no problem. No. I used these three things, all forgiven. I'm a chaya. Little strange. How does that work? The whole plot thickens when you open up a gemara in maseches megillah daf yud daled. The gemara says over there is Gyra Rachav converted as the gemara says here in Zvachim, "Venusva Yehoshua." She married none other than Yehoshua bin Nun. She didn't just convert. She converted, wonderful. She's a Jew like any other Jew. She marries Yehoshua bin Nun. Now, that's a far stretch. 40 years Yehoshua was learning Torah by Moshe. Lo yamish mitoch ha'oya. We know what she was doing for 40 years, the gemara says. After 40 years she's now 50 years old, she converts and it's like we need a shidduch. Okay, great. Yehoshua bin Nun. Also seems like a far stretch. We know that chuvah transforms mistakes. We know that a convert 36 times as the Torah tell us to be sensitive and loving to a convert. There's a letter from the Rambam to a convert who writes to him that there was a rabbi in shul. It's printed in the Sha'alos u'Teshuvos ha'Rambam who scorned and made fun of him. And the Rambam says the only good thing I could say about that rabbi that he was most probably drunk. So, he says he was probably drunk, but he should fast and do chuvah and ask shuvah chaya. We understand that. Nonetheless, for Rachav to marry Yehoshua bin Nun, what is the the of this? And if that's not enough, the Gamara says over there in Megillah that there were eight of the greatest prophets who were Kohanim, and they were all descendants of Rahab, including Huldah the prophetess, including Jeremiah, including Ezekiel. So, you have here the great Jeremiah the prophet, Ezekiel the prophet, Huldah the prophetess, one of the great women prophetesses, and they're all descendants of Rahab. There's a Tanna De Vei Eliyahu Zuta, chapter 22, and Chazal say there that the greatness of repentance is greater than prayer. Moses, David, Repentance is greater than prayer. Moses, David, they never made it into the land of Israel. Rahab's repentance was accepted, and he continues, why is she called Rahab? Rahab means broad. To broaden, broadening, because the the Lord your God has enlarged your territory. Because she was broad in her virtues and merits. She was broad and expansive in her virtues and merits, and seven of the Jewish prophets emerged from her. So, how are we to understand this story of Rahab? Who is this lady? What are Chazal trying to teach us when they describe to her a very apparently a very promiscuous life, and then a radical transformation to the other extreme? Because conversion and repenting is one thing. Marrying the leader of the Jewish people, the successor of Moses our teacher, not Moses, but the successor of Moses, son of Nun, Moses son of Amram, son of Joshua, son of Nun, the Gamara says over there in Bava Batra, is a stretch. The Maharal of Prague, the famous Maharal of Prague, Rabbi Judah Loew of Prague, who lived in the 16th century, in the 1500s. He was born in 1520, approximately, and he passed away 1609. He wrote many, many works. One of them is Hidushei Aggados, a commentary on the stories in the Gemara, Hidushei Aggados LaMaral. Here, we put in a quote from the Maral. His language is usually difficult, sometimes cryptic, philosophical, abstract. You have to learn the Maral very well to understand it. There is usually many layers of depth. But he opens up a window to see a deeper dimension of what our sages are trying to teach us with the story of Rachav. And the focus, of course, is those three items. The window, the flax, and the rope. Because, obviously, you know, you we we read these Gemaras, okay? Flax, window, rope, forgive me, but really, what is going on here? Why is this Why are these the three central items in her story of transformation? As I said before, she used these three items for promiscuity, okay? Now, she used these three items to save these two lives. Does that become the key of the story, and that's why she should be forgiven for 40 years of promiscuity? Repentance is always possible, no question. But why not focus on repairing your behavior? That's what teshuvah is. I have remorse for the past, and I'm going to change my behavior for the future. That's the definition of teshuvah. That's it. As the Rambam discusses in Hilchos Teshuvah, what teshuvah is. Remorse for the past, resolution for the future, verbal confession, etc. But here, we ignore that. We focus on three incidental items. And what if she didn't HAVE FLAX? WHAT IF SHE HAD ANOTHER PLANT? What if she had other bushes there, not pistom? And if IT WASN'T WHAT IF it was not a window, it was a door? And what if it was not a rope, if they had another method of getting out of her home? It happens to be those were the three items. That's why she wants to be forgiven, because of those three items. Let's see the Maral inside. As I said, it's a little complicated reading. I'm going to read it. I'm going to read the whole thing. And then I shall try to decipher it and see what the Maral is saying. Maral's Kuf design Shagal. Somebody who engages in promiscuous relationships, it begins with the eyes. There's obviously also a deep visceral emotional reaction, a craving, a crush, an inclination, a desire. And then there is the actual relationship, the actual physical and emotional connection. It begins with my eyes, it continues with my heart, but it results in our connection. The actual deed, whatever it means, the spending time, the relation, the intimacy, the physical, emotional, actual connection, whatever that entails. No fear. The window Rahab speaks about, it's not just a physical window through which they came in and out. The window allows me the ability to see that's which is outside of my own room, outside of my own corner, outside of my own home. The ropes then were made out of the fabric of linen. So, the pishton is the plant from which ultimately you're going to be able to weave a rope. The rope IS WHAT CONNECTS. SO, THE PISHTON, THE PLANT, which is the source of the rope, is the thought, the desire, the emotion, the visceral excitement, which ultimately will lead to the actual connection because the rope comes from the plant. The plant is weaved and develops into the rope, which is the connection, but it all begins with my own hero, with my own internal thoughts and attitudes and experiences. The zachar comes. So, the gemara really is mentioning here the accessories to the sin and the sin. The gemara says the eyes and the heart are the two sarsur, the two accessories, that allow you to come to the next step. I see and I react. That's within me. The first thing is the seeing, which is the window. That's the first accessory. Then we get to the flax. So, we have the window and we have the flax. Those are the two sarsur avera. There's the seeing and then there's the thinking, the pondering, the contemplating, allowing my heart to get excited, all of my inner emotions. And that's why the thoughts and the desire is like the pishton, the plant of the flax which is woven into the rope because it's even when you actually connect, when you actually engage the desire that not end, on the contrary, the desire and the thoughts are still there because the piston is the beginning of the rope and even when you have the rope, it's still made out of flax that heat remains in the action. It's not like it disappears. Come yesh lo das, but there's something else you have to know, says the Myra. He have piston oil bad bad. You have to know how flax grows. Those who are learning the Sukkah Yuma will soon get there by an olive from the Sukkah Yuma. Come sham ru Yuma in olive me bad the piston. The Myra tells us whenever the Torah uses the word bad, it's referring to the linen fiber which is the fiber made from flax flaxseed. Flax plant. So when it says by Yom Kippur big day bad beginning of acharei mot, that the coin godol puts on four garments and they're called big day bad. This is linen. When it says me BAD U MICHNASIM BAD, THIS IS LINEN. WHY? BAD, what does bad mean? So the Myra says bad me oil bad bad. The Myra says as follows, flax from which linen is made is like hemp in the sense it doesn't divide into branches. There's no branches. Like a tree divides into branches. Rather, it grows from the ground in stalks. Each stalk is bad. Bad from the word badad. BOIDED BADAD YESHEV LEVAD. WHAT DOES LEVAD MEAN? You're alone. Each stalk is alone, independent. Linen is made from the inner stalk of the plant but it stands alone. Each one of the seed capsules of the flax plant emerge and grow individually. So the flax says the Gamara is a lonely plant. And that's what the word bad means, like lavad, like bodet. Says the says the Gamara the whole Actually Rashi over there in Yuma, this Yuma that he's quoting, Rashi says a piston canvas, flax and hemp England bad and bad nothing case. They don't branch out like other trees and plants. Ella Allen, they have leaves. They ain't not piston bad element of common hands side. The lemon is made from the inner stalk of the plant. Says the Maral the whole double show who bad show me a lesson bad up. Anything that is lonely mistake and a Hebrew show by a bad up. Craves connection because loneliness is intolerable. So I crave attached if I'm bothered, I need attachment. I need connection. All the FIGURE HAVE PISTON LOOKING AT A HEBREW SO WHEN HAZAL WANT TO IDENTIFY something that is longing and yearning for connection, that's the symbol of piston. If you're not alone, you're not longing for connection. You have it. All trees are already part of a community. They're part of and today when we learn the science of botany more and more, we know how much communication there is not only within a tree itself, but from one tree to another tree. They call it the language of trees, which is quite amazing. The Gamara says in Sukkah the Yochana ben Zakkai understood the conversations of trees. So we used to read this and say, "Okay, you know, thank you." What do we was that supposed to mean? But today they say there's books, there's there's websites, there's articles the conversations of trees. They're talking all day. They don't stop. They're worse than me. They don't stop. Okay? The thing is they don't talk through words, they talk through chemicals, but they communicate. They don't stop communicating. There's a whole community life. A tree sees that another tree is in danger, right? Because bacteria is attacking it, it exudes chemicals. First of all, to warn the other trees to protect themselves, and suddenly a few seconds later, all the trees are now protecting themselves. Incredible stuff. So, THEY'RE IN COMMUNITY. PISTON, THE MOUTH SAYS IS THE SYMBOL. It's Muha Malachim. It's waiting. It's longing. It's ready for connection. It wants connection. The chain of Adam to be alone in the cave. The Maral's words. A person who doesn't have a feminine, a masculine man who doesn't have his feminine counterpart. Who who bought that? He's alone. We all long for connection. Thus, the human thoughts and craving for the woman. Just for the The woman is searching FOR THE MAN. THIS IS WHAT HAZAL MEAN WHEN THEY SPEAK ABOUT PISTON. SO, but I'm in the Hebrew location. I'm alone. And I'm searching FOR CONNECTION. WHAT'S THE ROPE? THE ROPE is the connection. What's the function of a rope in the world? The function of a rope is to connect two things. That's what a rope does. We want to connect two things. So, you take the animal or whatever it is, and you tie the rope to the animal, and you put the rope on the hook or whatever else it is, THE BOAT, ANY OBJECT. THE FUNCTION of the rope is to create the actual Hebrew. This the Maral says is how you have to understand what the Gamorah says. Now, what do we do with this? Interesting stuff here. Connection, attachment, longing, seeing. What What is the my dad really telling us here? If we think about this and we develop these words, we are privy here to an incredible insight into relationships, into the process of human emotions, and most importantly, what is it that makes an addict an addict? What made Racha of Racha? And how can an addict heal? And I'm not only talking about the addicts that you know, that one addict that you know in your family or your friends. I'm talking about the addict inside each of us. Because everyone, part of life is the pain of separation. And we all confront the pain of separation. And the pain of separation creates a longing and a yearning. And that's the bad And in Kippur, you have to confront that. That's the day of chuva. And that's the uniqueness of Racha. In Kippur, you have to wear. Why does the more TO SAY BAD ABOUT? WHO CARES WHY THE COME OUT OF THIS LONELY ON Yom Kippur? He's married. They say Zevista. Can you not have to be married on Yom Kippur? If he wasn't married, it's a question of the avoid this kosher. Titus Yishanam and in Yuma brings two shitas of the ever that avoid this even kosher on Yom Kippur. If he's not married, or it's just a killer. Okay, it's an interesting question. Base of Zevista. And yet he had to confront this element of bad. And that's the day of chuva. So, how do we understand this? So, there's three components here. The window is what allows us to look outside and to see outside of ourselves. The rope is what allows us to link two separate entities. Why did the Rahab become Rahab? Why for 40 years did she seek and successfully encounter and have relations with Cole Sar of a nugget every person of prominence in Canaan? Rahab is representing a certain type of person. And I would think Yeshua would run as fast as he can from such a person. She wants to do chuva, great. Right? But are you going to marry her off to your son? Really, honestly. I mean, 40 years. Not of it was a mistake, you know, two days, two weeks, three weeks. Today in psychology is a very famous condition known as attachment disorder. Attachment disorder today is seen as responsible, not for everything, but for almost everything. Since you weren't attached, since you did not experience healthy attachment as a child, you're looking for it your whole life. And that longing for attachment creates a very deep sense of insecurity. We need attachment. They didn't always think so. You have to credit John Bowlby, Sue Johnson, primarily John They didn't allow you, remember? Till the Rabbi Singer remembers, I don't. But till the early 1960s, you couldn't stay with your child in the hospital. You drop off the child in the hospital, YOU GO HOME. Even telling your child I love you was already too dramatic. Emotional constipation was much healthier. The being lovey-dovey, cuddling with your children, no, no, no, this is going to turn them into dependent, spoiled brats who won't be able to be strong and firm and make decisions and take responsibility FOR THEIR LIFE. LET'S NOT DO THAT. Bowlby fought the psychological establishment successfully. If you could stay today with a child in the hospital, you have to thank him. And he did it through videos of baboons, showing the anxiety of separation. He showed that it's the other way around. The more healthy attachment you have as a child, the more independent you could become as an adult. And the classic example for that is, you have a 2-year-old, 3-year-old playing in the family room with LEGO, and Mommy's in the kitchen cutting a cucumber, or good tatty on Memorial Day standing in the kitchen and cutting a cucumber, and also not on Memorial Day. And after 10 minutes, your little higher, your little sutter, your little cute angelic dove it looks up, and Mommy's in the kitchen, he looks, goes back down to the LEGO, and hopefully there for another 2 hours, may Hashem be blessed, at least for another 9 minutes, may Hashem be blessed, at least you pray. Right? What happens if he looks up and Mommy's not there? He doesn't go back to the LEGO. Now he starts searching everywhere. And what if Mommy left the house? He's frantic. When he has the security of attachment, he could do his own thing. When we don't have the security of attachment, we're longing for it. We need connection. They used to think the antithesis of addiction was sobriety. Researchers today say the antithesis of addiction is not sobriety. The antithesis of addiction is connection, not sobriety. Proof? Everybody has a grandmother who had 86, broke her hip, and was in the hospital for 3 weeks, AND THEY GAVE HER HEROIN FOR 3 WEEKS. YOUR 86-YEAR-OLD BUBBA SHOULD HAVE COME HOME A FULL-BLOWN ADDICT. I NEVER met an 86-year-old Bubba. Not from New York, not from Lakewood, not from Monsey, not from Passaic, and not from Manhattan, who was an addict. Why? The answer is cuz she has 19 grandchildren jumping all over her when she comes home. The antithesis of addiction is not sobriety. The antithesis of addiction is connection. Connection is not a mistake. Connection is not a bad thing. Connection is woven into the fabric of human nature. The one who wove it into the fabric of human nature is not random evolution. Evolutionary psychologists say, "We need connection because the foragers survived with connection." Packs of humans, Homo sapiens. From a Jewish perspective, look at Bereshit, lo tov hayosho Adam levadoi. The first thing Torah says is not good is being alone. I would think if someone would ask a Jew, "What's the first thing that Torah says is not good?" You would think carbs. Okay. Um sorry. Uh idolatry. Idolatry. Yeah, that's not good. That's not the first lo tov. The first lo tov in the Torah is hayosho Adam levadoi. You're alone. Loneliness. No connection. I'm alone in the world. Nobody cares for me. I'm not connected to anybody. I don't belong to anybody. Nobody validates me. Nobody believes in me. Nobody loves me. I can't trust anybody. The four S's of parenting. Those kids have to feel safe, secure, soothed, and seen. But how can I soothe my child if my child doesn't feel seen, understood, appreciate? But it's not just a 3-year-old who needs connection. THE 48-YEAR-OLD NEEDS THE SAME CONNECTION. THE ONLY DIFFERENCE is we know how to numb it. We know how to escape it. We know how to flee our loneliness. Who wrote about Piano Man sharing the cup of loneliness, right? But it's better than drinking alone. I'll drink. I'll smoke. I'll go to websites. I'll do whatever I have to do. Addiction. And each of us in our own way, it's the symptom of loneliness, of pissed off. I need a relationship. I need somebody to take me out of my self-consciousness, of my solitaries, of my confinement, of my loneliness. Rachav has a big heart. Rachav has a big soul. Rachav. She's a broad neshama. She's a big neshama. Which means she feels her loneliness more acutely. I was once at a Shabbaton in Boca Raton with the unforgettable Rabbi Doctor Abraham Joshua Heschel Tworksi, Rabbi Yeshua Heschel Tworksi, zichrono livracha, who just passed away a few months ago in Yerushalayim. And had in his tava, no eulogies, just the niggun Hashiyahu Hasamecha, which he composed. Sheyahu was You probably saw some of the clips. We were at a Shabbaton together. So, I turned to him. I said, "Doctor Tworksi, you're a doctor. You've been in this field for 60 years. Can you summarize it for me in 10 seconds? I don't have patience to go learn for 60 years about addiction, recovery, healing, therapy. You know, you paid all the money, you got the degree, you're a doctor, you're out. Just give it to me in 10 seconds. You know, I'm ADHD on steroids. Just give it to me snap, please." I thought he would shrug me off, you know, let someone else go to somebody else, like Shama, you know, threw out the guy, the whole pair on one leg. Go somewhere else. He looked at me, and he said, "Yeah." He said the addicts are the most spiritually sensitive people among us. And this self-consciousness kills them. And therefore, they have to numb the pain in much more aggressive ways than anybody else. Because the spiritual longing that they have is deeper than everybody else. He says, "That's what you should know when you see an addict." Okay, I got it. 10 seconds. This is what the moral is saying. The trauma that creates loneliness, the deeper the sensitivity, the deeper the loneliness. The deeper the loneliness, the more I need an escape. The more aggressive I'm going to be. And remember, today's escape won't work for tomorrow. Tomorrow, I need a greater dose. I need a greater dose to numb me even more. But what's this pain coming from? It could be abuse. It could be molestation. It could be verbal, emotional abuse. It could be dysfunction. It could also be epigenetics. It could be trauma I got from my parents, my grandparents, my great-grandparents. It's not It's not even on me today. It could be nature. It could be nurture. And from a spiritual point of view, some souls are traumatized by the separation that happened at the moment of creation. Pre-creation, everything was infinite oneness. Creation comes to its end, so God withdrew his infinity to create a feeling of separateness. Some of us don't care. Pass the pizza. It's fine. Sensitive souls, existence is trauma. Existence. Confronting existence is trauma. That's pishta. WE ALL EXPERIENCE PISHTA. WHAT DO I DO WITH THE PISHTA? I open a window. I start looking. And at some point, I'm going to throw out a rope. I want to connect. The question is, what am I going to SEE THROUGH MY WINDOW and what am I going TO CONNECT WITH? RACHAEL WHO HAD A BIG SOUL WAS SEARCHING for real connection. And she was never satisfied. 40 YEARS she checked out, literally, NO PUN INTENDED. SHE CHECKED OUT EVERY GOOD GUY ON THE BLOCK. AND NOT JUST ON THE BLOCK, IN THE WHOLE COUNTRY. It didn't work. And the reason it didn't work is because it was ultimately not a real connection. I can't fake connection. I can make believe I'm faking it, but how long can you make believe that you're faking? How long? Some of you remember Zero Mostel. Remember Zero Mostel? He won three Oscars. I wondered, who gives their son a name Zero? So, I found out his name wasn't Zero. His name was Schmuel Yoelson. He grew up in the Bronx. A religious family, a frum family. Know some of I know some of the family. There was somebody in his family who sold him Schmuel Yoelson, du bist a garnished and du bist bleibn a garnished. Those words, you're a zero you're going to remain a zero. He left Yiddishkeit. He became very successful in Hollywood in acting. And he needed a new name. Somehow Broadway didn't like Schmuel Yoelson for whatever reason. And Samuel Joel also didn't work for the movies. So, he chose a name. What was the name? Zero. They asked him, why Zero? He said somebody promised me that I will remain a zero and I want to show him that I've lived up to his expectations. But then realized something so real and sad. If you're not going to make your child feel special, somebody else will. But it's going to be in a different way. I desperately need connection. I may befriend my alcohol. I may befriend my websites. I may befriend my gambling. I may befriend my drugs. I may befriend my clubs. I may befriend anybody I can meet and somehow have my urges satisfied. But tomorrow, I will need more and more and more because my loneliness has not been dealt with because these are not connections. These are distractions. And distractions don't deal with the void. Distractions simply get me drunk so I don't think about the void for 2 hours. And then tomorrow, the void is much profounder. Real connections are tough. Real connections are ultimately personified by long-term relationships. Long-term relationships means you got to deal with your husband. I don't mean you. And you got to deal with your shiksa. I don't mean you. Present company excluded. Real relationships are different. Real relationships mean I have to create space for you. It's not a momentary thing. I have to learn about you. BUT THAT'S THE ONLY WAY MY PISHKA can be dealt with. After 40 years, Rachav met two people. The Tanakh doesn't say this, but Chazal say they had names, Calev and Pinchas. Rachav didn't only meet them. Rachav encountered people who had a real connection. It's here with Arizal takes it one step further. Arizal has a safer his Rabbeinu Menachem Azariah was one of the great Kabbalists of the 1600s. He was a student of a student of Arizal as it says in Gilgulei Neshamot based on the teachings of Rabbeinu Chaim Vital from Arizal. And he writes there Yehoshua came from Ephraim and he was an incarnation of Yosef. Rachav was a Gilgul of the wife of Potiphar. The wife of Potiphar, her soul was reincarnated into Rachav. Yehoshua and Rachav didn't meet here the first time. They met back in Egypt. The wife of Potiphar constantly wanted to be with Yosef. And if there was ever a lonely man, it was Yosef. Did he suffer from attachment disorder? At nine his mother died, Rachav. At 17 his brothers, brothers are supposed to protect a baby brother, threw him into a pit. Sold him into slavery. If there was ever a lonely man, it was Yosef. AND IN THAT LONELINESS, there was a woman who wanted him. And the Gemara says in Yoma, it was not long ago on the Daf Yomi, Daf Lamed Hey, Rabbi Bassel, Daf Lamed Hey, right? The Gemara says the wife of Potiphar dressed up in different outfits a few TIMES A DAY. CAN IMAGINE POTIPHAR'S CREDIT CARD. EVERY DAY, BREAKFAST, LUNCH, DINNER, DIFFERENT OUTFITS LIKE IN THE Pesach hotels. You know the pressure on the women over there? I come with my kapota, I could be in it for two weeks, two years, nothing. I tell my wife, "Why does it take two weeks to pack?" She says, "You don't understand." I don't. I don't understand. Okay. One advantage of being a man, not too many, but one. Shmaya Sonei Isha for the Pesach programs. Packing up an old car, takes me 5 minutes to pack. But Potiphar had to pay for it. You know that my son in LA the other day, the police pulled over a certain guy. They show him a credit card. They say, "Is this your credit card?" Yankel says, "Yeah." They say, "What happened?" He says, "It was stolen a year ago." They said, "We found it." He said, "Okay, baruch Hashem." They said, "Why didn't you report it?" He said, "I'll tell you the truth, I was getting the bills every month, and it was much, much less than what my wife had it." So, I decided I'll just I'll just It's just a joke. It's just a joke. It's not a massive Potiphar's wife did not stop, and she told Yosef, "I'll blind you. I'll oppress you. I'll murder you." And he said, "Sorry." The kabasi lashem kol hayom. Mitgudim, she said, "I'll reward you. I'll give you the best of the best. You're a slave. You have nothing. Egypt is not a democracy. It's before Lincoln's days. You were a slave for life. You had nothing. GIVE ME A FEW MINUTES." YOSEF SAID, "NO." But then the Gemara says in Sota Lamad Hey, vayavo vayavo ba'isa lasus malacha, that one day he came home. Rav and Shmuel. And Yosef surrendered. He couldn't take it anymore. Listen, it's before Martin Torah. He's alone in the world. He's not going to give out a bad reputation on the family. His sisters won't be rejected from seminary because of it. His brothers won't lose good shidduchim for it. His brothers will still be allowed in Brisk and Mir and even in Slabodka and Ponevezh and Chevron. Because he's in Egypt, nobody knows. There won't be signs that Shabbas in shul Avia Avos Atuma. There won't be pictures on WhatsApp. He's in Egypt over there. This is what you do. 17-year-old boy. What happens? Says the Gamara, he sees the image of his father in a window. The image of his father in the window. What does that mean? He abstains. What did he see? There was a video of Yaakov in the window? CNN interviewed Yaakov Avinu and they showed it in Egypt? What what was happening? What was going on? What's this nearing like? Did Ya- Yosef have attachment? A mother he didn't have. Brothers he didn't have. They were enemies. But he did have attachment. How I know he had attachment? The possuk says about Yosef, "Vayima'en." With the shalsheles. What what's this three "Vayima'en"? How long does it take to SAY NO? "VAYIMA'EN." With the shalsheles. But there's one more time it says "Vayima'en" previously. We know in Tanya when two words two of the same words are used, they're always connected. We call it meshu'ar zeh im zeh shavim. What's the previous "Vayima'en"? Same parsha. When Yaakov heard that Yosef was devoured, "Vayima'en l'hishakeach." He refused to be comforted. Why? Says Rashi, for a dead person, you can move on. For a living person, there's no closure. "Ein Adam ein hachai mishtake'ach min halev." You can't forget a living person. There's no closure. But this also is referring to something spiritual. Spiritually, it was people can give up on Joseph. He's dead. Sometimes there's a child in a pit. In the pit of addiction, in the pit of depression, in the pit of mental or emotional or physical or spiritual illness, and you say, "It's forget it." But you might as well SAY, "JACOB SAID NO, MY JOSEPH IS NOT DEAD. MY Joseph is alive." They said, "Nah, Joseph was always the black sheep of the family, standing in front of a mirror for hours, never got along with anybody. He's not the mishpucha. He's a shame to the family. Now, YOU DON'T KNOW MY JOSEPH." But you might as well say, "Jacob would not stop thinking and crying and connecting to Joseph." You know what happens? Hundreds of miles away, in Egypt, Joseph is in the abyss with the wife of Potiphar. But you might as well say, "You know why he refuses the temptation with Potiphar's wife? Because he has a father who refuses to give up on him." When you have a father or a mother or both who believe in you, you could believe in yourself. The word "vayamoin" comes from the word "emun", "emuna", CONFIDENCE, TRUST, FAITH. BUT YOU MIGHT AS WELL SAY, "JACOB HAD EMUNA IN JOSEPH. HE BELIEVED IN JOSEPH HUNDREDS OF MILES AWAY AND EMPOWERED JOSEPH TO believe in himself and say, 'I'm not going to sell my loneliness and fill my void through external promiscuity that will solve nothing. Because your loneliness needs real connection, which can only come through moral, deep, real, authentic relationships.'" The Torah says when they threw him into the pit, "Vaboy reik ein baymayim." There was no water. Why is that relevant? The empty pit, there's no water. Cuz I'll struggle with this. THERE WAS NO WATER. JUST SAY PIT. HE THREW HIM IN THE PIT. THERE WAS A LITTLE WATER. THERE WAS NO WATER. THERE'S A VERY PROFOUND MESSAGE HERE. You know, in life they say sometimes you feel that you were buried. But really you were planted. But in order to be planted, you need water. Did Joseph see himself buried or planted? He was buried. Buried alive. But he saw himself as planted. He told his brothers, "You didn't sell me. God sent me to provide grain, which is what grows from the earth." There's one problem. You can't grow anything without water. How boy rake came by Mayan? How can Joseph be planted if there was no water? And the answer is the next possible next Jacob did not stop crying. And those tears of Jacob were what irrigated the pit that allowed Joseph not to be buried, but to be planted. And then transplanted into Egypt and become a source of life for everybody. That's the possible Hamas. Which tears? Jacob's tears. The almost ALL THE SHEAVES THAT THEY DREAMT ABOUT THAT WILL BOW DOWN TO JOSEPH BECAUSE JOSEPH NEVER LOST CONNECTION. WHAT WERE THE CLOTHES that pirate put on on Joseph when he became a viceroy? Big day shave. Once again, push down. Linen bath. Joseph's loneliness was a loneliness that didn't cause HIM TO LOSE HIS IDENTITY. It made him aware of he really needed. He really needed connection. And that connection he cultivated with his soul, with God, and ultimately at the right moment with Rachav. Yehoshua was a reincarnation of Yosef. Rachav was a reincarnation of the wife of Potiphar. THE SAME WOMAN WHO WANTED YOSEF. AND RACHAV for 40 years was looking for that Yosef. Again and again and again AND AGAIN AND AGAIN. AND THEN SHE MEETS PINCHAS and Caleb. Her life is transformed. She learns about a different type of connection. And when she converts, such a big soul, goes directly to Yehoshua, but not before she says, "It's those three things. BESHALACH HAVE A HALOINU PISTIM. YEAH, I AM A HOLY. 40 years of addiction were transformed in a moment, the moment she realized what the flax was all about, what the window was all about, and what the rope was all about. She didn't escape her past. She redefined her whole experience. Understanding that the search was a search for a real relationship with your own real connection. And the ultimate source of connection is the connection between man and God. That's why we all want attachment because we are all a halek elokecha mimol mamash, and you cannot be separated from yourself. Adam searches for Hava, Hava searches for Adam. That makes up the tzelem elokim. And all of us search for ourselves, and we search for the ultimate source of oneness, because that's the only thing that's going to satisfy me. I tell my friends, I say, "Listen, you don't have a choice whether to search or not to search. You're going to be searching for God. The only choice you have is are you going TO DISTRACT YOURSELF FROM THE SEARCH OR will you embrace what you're really searching for? But that search is never going to end. That loneliness is not going to LEAVE YOU. THAT ANXIETY YOU CANNOT GET RID OF BECAUSE IT IS WHAT MAKES YOU HUMAN. It's what makes you great and in your case it's what makes you rough. It's what makes you who you are. The question is how am I going to satisfy it? What am I going to do with it? How did Caleb and Pinchas teach this to rough of? So here we come to the last point. And due to uh time constraints, I'm going to do this in 5 minutes even though this is the whole mattress and in the first source sheet, but instead of reading it as I'm just going to encapsulate it very briefly. It's all in that one word Joshua sent death spies. Really? Death spies? That's the possuk. SHNAYIM ANASHIM MERAGLIM CHERESH. WHAT IN THE WORLD is that supposed to mean? So if you open up a Midrash Rabbah, the Midrash Rabbah brings two opinions of and each opinion is more strange than the other. says Joshua told them take earthen pottery with you. Cheresh doesn't mean death, IT MEANS CLAY CHERESH. YOU BECOME MERCHANTS OF earthen wear. Sell earthen wear. People ask you what BRINGS YOU TO CANAAN? WHAT BRINGS YOU TO JERICHO? OH, WE'RE SELLING POTTERY. WHERE DO YOU COME FROM? WE COME FROM A PLACE WHERE THEY MAKE POTTERY. OKAY, unbelievable strategy, right? Oh, everybody suddenly going to believe them. Come, let me tell you the deepest secrets about our army and about our government and about our fortresses. You sell pottery, that's wonderful. Could you sleep in our home for a few weeks? And why earthen wear pottery? Why not metal? And why not jewelry? Vas apis clay Harris. If you remember in Yichye says, Asu atzmechem cheresh va'atem omdim al rozehem. Make believe you're deaf and mute. So, they'll speak in front of you and you'll know all the secrets. Cuz in front of a deaf person, you're not afraid to speak. Now, I want to ask you the logic. If you're living in Jericho and you're a Canaanite or a Chivite or an Amorite or a Perizzite, you know, the guys who live in Clifton. I mean, they're obsolete, but if you're one of those people and suddenly you see a guy comes into your garden and you're like, "Good morning. How are you?" And now suddenly you'll spill all the beans in front of him. You're going to give him the atomic secrets, right? Why? Cuz he made himself deaf for 2 minutes? I mean, that's basic espionage 101. If you remember, make believe you're deaf and everybody will say everything in front of you. Why wouldn't anybody be suspicious? Hard to understand. So, the Sfas Emes in this piece brings something he heard from his grandfather, the Chidushei Rim. Chidushei Rim was a Yitzchak Meir of Ger, Yitzchak Meir Alter, the first Gerer Rebbe passed away in 1866. He was a student of the Kotzker Rebbe, Reb Menachem Mendel, Rebbi Menachem Mendel Morgenstern. After the Kotzker's passing, he moved to Gur, not far from Warsaw. And he's known as the Chidushei Rim. He had 12 children. All besides one died in his lifetime. He raised his grandson, the Sfas Emes, Reb Yehudah Aryeh Leib, who succeeded him a few years after his passing. In In middle, there was Reb Henoch, but then there was the Sfas Emes who passed away in 1905. The Sfas Emes here in Slach quotes his grandfather to explain a very enigmatic Medrash Rabba on the parsha, which we have here in the source sheets. But I'm going to tell you very briefly the insight. A clay cheres, earthenware pottery, has a very interesting halacha. We all know there's something called tumah. If God forbid somebody dies, everything in the tent under the corpse is tamei, if it's susceptible to tumah. And that would include all metal vessels and all golden vessels, silver, anything metal that's mekabel tumah, it's tamei. Let's say a dead weasel falls into a a metal bowl or metal spoon, it's tamei. And there's a process of how to cleanse it in a mikvah, etc. There's something unique about clay cheres. Clay cheres metamei me'avira, which means as follows. Earthenware pottery, you take earth, you take water, mud, you mix it, you put in some straw, you bake it in the you mold it, you bake it in the oven or in the light, in the sun. If you touch it, if a dead weasel touches it, it's not tamei. Fascinating. How does it become tamei? If the tumah is suspended ba'avira, in midair. If a dead weasel, for example, goes into the vessel, even if it doesn't touch the walls, it's just suspended in midair, it becomes tamei. If it touches it from the outside, it's not tamei. That's why if you have a clay cheres in the tent, in a home where there's a meis, and it's tight, so the tumah can't get into the cavity, it's tahor. What's the logic? Why? The answer is as follows. Tumah is always dependent on value. The more use it has for a person, the more spiritual potential it has, the more tumah is attracted to it like bees attracted to honey. Clay glolin, vessels of dung, or vessels made of earth without even baking in the oven are so cheap, are so useless, there's no tumah. Clay cheres are very cheap cuz they're made of earth. They have to be made, you have to mold them, you have to bake them. They're really, really cheap. It's not like gold or silver, any other metal which has some value on its own. Says the Sfas Emes, "What's the value of clay cheres?" Not the kayli itself. It's usage. So, where does it become tamei? Only in the cavity. Because the value of the clay cheres is not the kayli itself. It's what it carries. IT'S WHAT YOU COULD PUT INTO IT. IT'S WHAT IT'S FILLED WITH. THAT'S ITS VALUE. IF THAT'S its value, THAT'S WHAT BECOMES TAMEI. TOUCHING THE WALL OF IT, that's not susceptible to tumah. The wall is nothing. The kayli is of value, valueless. It's what it carries, it's what you could put into it, it's what it contains. Tashmisha. That's the clay cheres. So, Yeshua, I told Yeshua and Caleb, you have to asu atzmachem the language is asu atzmachem kidai cheresh. Make yourself earthen wear pots. So, we explain, "Sell it." He says, "No." He's talking to them about themselves. Whenever you go on a big and daring mission, there's only one way to be successful. And the way to be successful is to be like a clay cheres cuz God made Adam off from in ha'adamah, so each of us is a clay cheres. What does it mean I'm a clay cheres? What does it mean practically? It means that I remember that my greatest value is not just my I. My greatest value is that I am an ambassador. I am a channel. Shlucha shalom kamisa. I'm an ambassador of Hashem in this world. The Gamorah says in Kiddushin a shliach represents the one who sent him. So therefore, I am actually divine. The moment you redefine yourself in terms of a shliach, now you operate in a different level. My ego is taken out of the picture. It's not personal. I recognize also that at my core I'm indestructible. I'm full of confidence, wholesomeness, and joy. If I look at myself in the mirror, I have trauma, I have fear, I have insecurity, I have flaws. Everybody deals with stuff. If I can identify myself, my real self, as what? As shlucha shalom kamisa, as a channel for infinity, as an ambassador of the Ribono shel Olam in this world, then nobody can beat you. Then there's no insecurity anymore. All insecurity comes from me talking to about me about who I am and who I'm not, my busy self-conscious, that repetitive voice in your brain that they have in the Pesach, where you talk to yourself the whole time and you're like your own narrator and telling yourself who you are, who you are. You make believe you don't know what I'm talking about. Okay, that's fine. Baruch Hashem. But the moment I can redefine myself as a channel, take my self, my ego out of the picture, it's very different. So you come home and your teenage girl or your teenage boy tells you something you really don't like hearing. What's the worst thing you can do? The worst thing you can do is take it personal. Starting up with me? This chutzpah, intolerable. Get out of my house. Go find yourself another father. What just happened? What just happened is my own loneliness, my own pain was triggered and I responded from a place of deep pain and I I'm ruining the relationship. But what if I could become a clay heiress? What if I could say I don't own this child. This child is God's child. And I said gave me a slickest a mission to help polish this diamond. So now the question is what does Hashem want from me at this moment? What does this child need? That's a very different question. And you'll see your response will be a very different response. I took my own insecurity, my own pain, my own loneliness, my own anxiety, my own stress out of the not because it doesn't exist. It doesn't exist. I'm human. I have an ego. I'm very insecure. I need not I need my children to be able to give me not but that's all human fiction. That's the idea that human that children were created to give their father and mother not us. It's something we love, we would love, but that's not true. You don't own your child. That's the story that's why we say that came to be day. Why do we say that came to be day? God told of wrong you is not owned by you. He's owned by me. So I don't say okay, take him back. GOD SAYS NO, YOU TAKE HIM BACK, BUT YOU DON'T OWN HIM. OKAY, SO TAKE HIM GOD. RIGHT? Take him. He says no. You're my messenger. I'm giving you to you as my slave, but you don't own him. You don't have to own him. Now Jewish mothers and fathers have a hard time hearing this. I apologize. But it takes off a lot of pressure. The K da is one of the most liberating moments in Jewish history. You never thought of it that way, right? The K da looks like this horrible story of like kill your son. Bob Dylan has a song kill your son. Really that K da is very liberating. The K da is basically saying it's not you. You're not responsible. Get rid of mom's guilt. It's not your child, it's Hashem's child. You're a clay cheres. I'm a channel. Hashem put this soul into my home because he trusted that my wife and I will be able to do what he wants in order to polish this diamond. AND THAT'S MY AVODAH. DO IT WITH SIMCHA, DO IT with dveykus, do it with attentiveness. If you make mistakes, learn from your mistakes. But don't make it personal. Every mission in the world, when you have this approach, unbeatable. There's one more thing you got to do. You got to be deaf. You got to be deaf. IF YOU AIN'T DEAF, NOTHING IS HAPPENING. BECAUSE THERE WAS NOBODY WHO EVER did anything worthwhile in the world who was not criticized. IF YOU'RE NOT CRITICIZED, GET A NEW CAREER. If you're not being criticized, if somebody is not telling you you're responsible for the destruction of the planet, you're probably not doing the right thing. Every great person who ever did anything, there were always the naysayers who told them, "You're a dreamer, you're a meshuggener, you're a fanatic, you're an extremist, you're a nudzh up, you're a shaita." Bring it on. You want to get feedback from people who will really care about you and people who want you to flex your muscles and be successful. But if you're going to get every feedback in the world that you're going to take it, you're doing this wrong, this wrong, this wrong, that wrong, that wrong, from people who won't lose sleep over you or your children. Speak deaf. Just learn how to be deaf. You want to be a marakya? You want to be shluchim tamim kmo Avrohom Avinu? You have to know who to listen to and what to listen to. You want to give me real constructive criticism cuz you want the success, I'm in. You have to cherish constructive criticism, it's the only thing that will make you grow. But you just want to put down, you just want to find the flaw, you want to find the say you want to tell me what I'm doing wrong, mama knows best. Daddy knows best. Listen to your own soul. Sometimes it comes to children, every therapist will give you different advice. Mama and Tata sometimes know best. Learn what people have to say, be introspective, but you have to sometimes be deaf. If not, you won't be successful. When Rachav met these two spies, she learned this art. Knowing what to listen in her heart to and what not to listen in her heart to. She also realized that the ultimate solution for loneliness is not going deeper into your insecurity, but realizing that you're a channel of infinity and therefore you could connect. The moment Rachav discovers these two things, she can experience a transformation and ultimately change her whole life and become the spouse of Yeshua bin Nun. Let me conclude with a little story. The truth is, when you think about this, the task of this Yeshiva is really this. That's what the Sfas Emes says at the end. He says every person is a miracle. Every person is a shliach whose soul was sent down into this world. And the only way you could be successful, you're going to find everywhere challenges and toxicity, and you have to be able to become a clay cheres, a channel, an ambassador, and know I am an ambassador of love, light, light, hope, healing, authenticity, wisdom, and redemption. I also have to be able to know what to be deaf to, and then you can succeed. And not only succeed, but even transform a who's really longing for that type of awareness, that type of connection, that type of relationship. This is a story that I wanted to leave you with. And uh in my mind, it really captures the spirit of the Jewish people. It just happened last week. Somebody sent me a clip. There's a kibbutz. It's the closest kibbutz to Gaza. The closest kibbutz to Gaza is called Kerem Shalom, the vineyard of peace. This kibbutz, if they send a rocket from Gaza, it takes 4 seconds to land. This is not a minute. This is not 30 seconds. You have 4 seconds. That's how close it is. Ashkelon is 30 miles from Gaza. It's further. This kibbutz is the closest to Gaza. During the last war of Hamas against Israel, 15 rockets landed in this kibbutz. 15 of the more than 4 to 4,000 rockets, 15 landed there. Why did they land there? Either the Iron Dome, which has a radar that detects where the missile where the rocket is going to land, detected that the rockets are going to land in open land, not populated, so they just let it go. Or maybe it was undetected. But the bottom line is that 15 rockets landed there. All of them created What are they called? Craters, right? They you created I saw the pictures of huge craters in the ground. These were serious rockets. And there were machine huge pits, caves. Last week the children of Kerem Shalom came to these craters and they planted trees in all of them. And I was looking at the pictures and I was thinking to myself, wow. In one picture captures two opposite life philosophies. One whose intention is to sow as much damage and death as possible on civilians. And the other one who takes crisis and turns it into opportunity. They asked the to children, "Why are you planting trees here?" They said, "Oh, we don't have to do the digging. The Hamas already did the digging for us." And I'm like, "Wow. Wow. What an approach. The Hamas did the digging for us. They created the craters. All we need to do is plant trees." Taking destruction, literally, and turning it into new life, new trees, new new vegetation, new growth. Reminds me when Sarah Schenirer founded Beis Yaakov in 1917, of course there were Jews who were very opposed to having girls schools. The first Beis Yaakov was in Krakow. A few years ago I went to visit it. And she had her first classroom. And of course some people came and threw rocks through the windows. And the rocks landed in the classroom and Sarah Schenirer, without blinking, picked up one of those rocks and she said, "So here we have our rock for the Chanukah's even hapinah, for the groundbreaking of the next Beis Yaakov that we're We're to begin building tomorrow. The answer I once said the says about all the coins I said I shall told you that would learn from each coin each little line on the that gets the those little coins you would learn mounds of the very unique expression coins coins means a coin. So you said I give her. Experience like nobody else the thorns. Of Roman oppression. On his own flesh literally as the says at the end of this. Circle I said I guess bars. What was his response I'll call coins every thorn that perforated skin and the skin of said I said every thorn he utilized as a springboard as A CATALYST. FOR REJUVENATION as in for Renaissance for renewal for transformation. And in many ways this is the secret of our survival turn crisis into opportunity. Take. Much better what is the word much better in Hebrew? Breakdown. But much better has another meaning in Hebrew. It's a birthing stool. A birthing stool. Every much better. It's also the birth of a new reality. That's the fact. That's the reason. I was once speaking near Brooklyn College was Hanukkah time. So the president of Brooklyn College and Irish woman wanted to know why Jews eat so many donuts and because of Hanukkah. So the classic answer that you heard in your Shiva was because the oil. Burned for 8 days but I didn't think that would work so so with a gentle because the oil didn't burn, it was supposed to burn for one day, and the oil burned for eight days, and the Ba'al HaBayit wants to know exactly why a kosher lion. So, therefore, we take donuts and latkes, and we leave them in the oil for eight months, and we eat them non-stop. So, for Jews, that's like mama seichel layashar. Like, that's what you're supposed to think. Makes sense, of course. But, you know, for for our Irish friends, I wasn't sure it's going to work. So, I needed a more like k'shes reason. So, I said it's pashet. Hanukkah represents the victory of the Jews over the Greeks. The Greeks were into looks, fashion, Olympics, and athleticism. So, Hanukkah we eat tons and tons of these foods to make sure that we will never, ever look like that. But, then I realized there is something deeper. I said, because we don't only like to write obituaries for our enemies. That's That's not a Jewish thing. What we really want to do is we want to eat them. We do. So, we took Pharaoh, and we turned him into a matzah ball. The most delicious Jewish food, a kneidel. It's all Pharaoh. We took Haman, and we turned him into a hamantash. The most delicious Jewish card. We took Antiochus, and we turned him into a latke. We don't only defeat our enemies, we want them to add to our cholesterol and our fat. Like, where is this fat coming from? Haman, Pharaoh, Antiochus. IT'S EXACTLY WHAT WE DO. THAT'S OUR WAY. EVERY crisis becomes a source of tikkun olam shalom bayit. And that's what Rachav understood at that moment. She lived 40 years of dysfunction, of promiscuity. She could have looked in the mirror and said, "My life was wasted." She said something much deeper than that. I'm going to take all my experiences and transform them into a springboard for the greatest spiritual rejuvenation cuz she understood that what what was at the core of all of her issues was longing. It was yearning. It was not evil at its core. So, she didn't just run away from her previous life. She redefined. SHE TRANSFORMED her previous life into a whole new reality. A reality of oneness. This class is brought to you by theyeshiva.net. Please help us continue the classes. Make even a small contribution at www.theyeshiva.net/donate.