The #6 Commandment of Dating: Healthily Share - Rabbi Eli Deutsch

Don't expect them to know anything about what you think, feel, and want. Welcome back to the 10 Commandments of Dating. This is commandment number six. Thou shalt healthily share. What does healthily sharing look like? It means we say, "I feel blank. I would love it if blank. It would mean so much to me if blank." This is sharing what is real for you, your need or desire, without an attachment, without twisting their arm to go ahead and do it. And that's the only healthy and dignified way to share and to speak in a relationship. And the truth is this is a lot easier to do in dating than it is, let's say, later on in a more committed relationship, in a marriage relationship, because we can put our authentic self out there in that healthy way. And if we feel like we're constantly being ignored, if we feel constantly being disrespected, so then it's much easier to just go ahead and show them the door. Remember, the purpose here isn't that you should marry this person. The point here is that you should see the truth of this person, and this person should see the truth of you, in order that you guys can go ahead and see if it's a relationship that you want to pursue. So, if someone is showing themselves out the door, don't close it. Let them show themselves out the door. That's great. Mission accomplished in terms of clarifying if this person is for you. And when we share healthily, we express ourselves in a healthy, dignified way, and the other person sees us in that way, and we're healthily communicating, and we are living from a place of dignity and integrity. So, this is the commandment for today. Follow for the rest of the series on the 10 Commandments of Dating.