Why Do I Always Feel Like a Bad Partner?

Why do I constantly feel like I'm failing at being a good partner? That's a very painful question and there are a couple of possibilities and they can both be true. One is that maybe you're not doing a very good job. Another possibility is that you're being told that you're not doing a good job when you actually are. And not every description of your personality that someone close to you gives you is necessarily accurate. Sometimes someone will tell someone else, "You're not a good partner. You're not loving. You're not considerate." And it's not entirely true. Nobody's perfect, but if you feel like you've been characterized as a failure, "Why do I constantly feel like I'm failing?" Those words constantly failing. If that's something that was put on you, that you were characterized that way by someone you love, I want you to consider the fact that they may also have a part in it. I'm just speaking from the preponderance of experience. I'll tell you a helpful thought. Somebody once told me that watering plastic flowers will not make them grow. If you're in a relationship where you constantly feel like you are failing, maybe you're watering plastic flowers. Maybe the person you're trying to love is currently not receptive or capable of recognizing that love. Or maybe you really are messing up. Or maybe they can both be a little bit true. It doesn't have to be black or white, but I do want you to consider the fact that rarely is it all your fault that you are just plain messing up every single time, that you can't seem to love someone right. That is so rarely the case. And frankly, the people who really are messing up constantly in their intimate relationships are not the same people who are asking this question in the first place.