Should I SURRENDER in my marriage?

people talk about you know I don't want to be a dmat I don't want to be a shata what if my spouse is being too demanding of me what if they're bossing me around and what should I just do whatever they tell me to do and not stand up for myself so it's very important to understand that when you let go when you make yourself agreeable when you make yourself humble flexible in marriage you're not surrendering your will to another human being you're surrendering your will to Hashem you're surrendering your will to Hashem and allowing your home to be a vessel within which The Godly presence can well when there is peace between is and Isha then there's the there is the present in the home but that can only be when you let him in when you allow the presence of Hashem and letting Hashem in is all about opening yourself up being a vessel so when you hold on tight to self-will Hashem can't be present when you surrender when you make yourself flexible when you're open then a power greater than yourself a power greater than the two of you can flow between you and into your home