Shnayim Yomi - Va'era - Chamishi - #5 - Rabbi Elchanan Shoff - A Space Where You Can Be You

In kamishi of our para we discover [snorts] that the wild animals came along the gamma they came along with the native habitats where they normally lived. Um and that's an interesting thing. Why was it necessary not only to bring lions and tigers but to bring their native habitats along too? Um Iitz in the midn explains that there's a garra that describes when hashem did a miracle and made bears appear and according to one opinion in the garra um there was a nace bes because bears appeared as did a forest and rashi explains that bears will be afraid to start up with people if they don't have a place close by to flee to but when they're near a forest then they'll run away so in other words the animals came because um they were supposed to do damage to the Egyptians and so they needed to be comfortable when a person is in their own territory in their own familiar land they are more comfortable there's also called who says a very similar thing that uh he says when animals are in their own territory then they're very fierce and courageous and they'll be very very dangerous you know human beings are the same way when a person is in their own territory they can be themselves. And for that reason, in our own homes, um, if our children are a little bit wild and they speak up and they're not always so bakovic, you know, when when your your same child is over at the neighbors, they're very friendly and they're very nice and the neighbor tells you, "Wow, your child is so well behaved." But when a person's at home, you can really be yourself, and that's a good sign. The only way that a home will be really really peaceful and calm, even when you have children who are not yet perfectly developed in their meetups, they're ch still children after all, is the only way they'll be absolutely perfect is if they're totally uncomfortable. So in homes that are very abusive, they'll have children that behave really nicely. Then I meet them at a parent teacher conference, you know, when I was teaching in Yeshiva, and they say, you know, I'll tell them, you know, your child's a lively kid. And they'll say, really? I mean, at home he's perfectly behaved. It's very alarming. Um, if a person will make their home very uncomfortable, very abusive, God forbid, then children will behave. But the blessing that we can give to our wives, to our children, is that in our home, they don't have to be absolutely perfect. If you're not perfect yet, that's where a complaint should come out to a good husband, right? Children should be a little bit wild. Teenage girls should be expressing their vibrant emotions loudly. And if that's what they have inside of them and they're not yet perfect in school and in other places where they're not fully comfortable, they will rein themsel in surely. But at home, they shouldn't have to because people can really be themselves when they're in their own territory and in their own place. And that's a huge brah that you can untuck your shirt and you can be yourself. Continue growing, continue becoming better, but have a safe place, too. We owe that to our children and our spouses and ourselves.