Shmorg 8: Bring Happy Back

[Music] Jim a limit other [Music] your good friend mr. Oswald really knows his where on the slimy places nothing it's all the Google Maps ocean warmer I'm a Google Maps very nice place you have here wonderfully dry air just what I need for my arthritis so what are you working on here yes yes please be careful around here as we are in the final stages of developing something that let's just say rhymes with shmoo clear shoe Evans oh look an elevator and a rock wall very clever [Music] yes very snazzy technology you have here I know right extra shiny lots of flashing current lights this facility was graciously donated by the Hadassah family donated in honor of the 25th Bethel America day so how can I be of assistance I'm guessing you're not just ready for the tour to get right to the point then is a custom ly specialized weapon of mass depression chemically engineered yeah and price doesn't matter I never heard of such a thing interesting well what does it blow up how big is the explosion it doesn't blow anything up it's a secret chemical weapons that will make everyone sad yes sad you know Wow we're know happy boho it goes a little like this [Music] cheers up the world you na a light service today and up for your grumpy run I'm happy when everyone is sad and device well your boat is bad Wow that's my off your face right feels like before everybody in their place everything and that is what we see [Music] you know what's causing global warming happiness there oh it burns my kiss kiss didn't name it and the next time some happy guys smiles and tells you to have a nice day how much something sad Fuji's plan I'm thrilled [Music] come to the world of five say hello meet everyone come and learn with five torgul so come to the world of irish plenty of room for everyone come and learn with five join and your ah sometimes we're learning ah [Music] where the learning is all [Music] so good yeah ah [Music] aluminum swim a limit a blur [Music] oh look at the time oh no I'm late again I gotta go to shul it's such a short flight oh just what I need so far you working on here yes please be careful [Music] more walking - laughs can't you finish staring my Kohana oh sorry [Applause] you know the hearing on Shabbos stinks so bad that when I came home from sure even my goldfish held its nose nah he wasn't that bad I thought it was delicious yeah this coffee is terrible almost as bad as the herring was on javis till dumb Tildy oh what a wonderful day this will be for me oh hey yoni and hi Donny oh and hello Mindy it's so nice to see you three today well five-ish we're glad to see you too I know for some reason everyone is so classy today yeah we haven't seen one person smile who except for you hmm I think you guys are right Reb Yankel was even more upset about his hearing than usual I knew something was strange we must get to the bottom of this but what if we get grouchy and kolache and grumpy and and you hear that Irish I know that song you cranky [Music] cranky and you know it clap your hands Mendy why are you clapping cuz I'm starting to feel cranky too yoni I have a funny feeling about what's going on I'm sorry I have a not so funny feeling about what's going on [Music] we interrupt this broadcast to warn everyone that happiness has been removed from the world the president has declared a state of emergency special correspondent Finn Finnegan is on the scene live in New York City where the epidemic seems to have hit the worst what a great day to be covering your Shia I say that race from Schwartz's bakery so shall we what do you have to say about this ah the lines it's terrible the babies the crying they complain when I give them cookies but it has so many sprinkles now one was happy birthday cakes just plain birthday and worst of all someone switched on the cookies cake filling with mud disgusting that you initial reports are that doctor asked Kosh B'gosh is claiming responsibility and that the source of the contamination may be in the water supply for now no one should be drinking any water this is John O'Brien for kcl news wishing you a miserable day this is terrible finished I'm scared what if we're never happy again calm down guys we are still happy craziness and sadness is a terrible thing I'm suppose is such a bad meter and worse it's contagiously epidemic Arroyo option consulting services child speaking how can I be helping you I plan on running for president you better have the right number first thing you need is a motorcade most important one second I have a beep the option consulting services child speaking out gonna be helping you hello slow-mo Mackel how's that you are sure it is how you doing one second I just need to get over the other line gotta go goodbye and oh yes slow-mo mekel how are you I'm doing fine how about you mr. president how's the website going yeah I told you I could have done it better well everything is baracus them get it before I kiss em well actually it's not you see I kind of need your help sure are you anything what do you need well you see we're under attack with WMDs weapons of mass depression and this is only getting worse and this is getting very serious and I think the only one who can help is five-ish of course of course Irish yeah yeah but you see I hear that that Nord again touch them I'm gonna need some protection yet if you know what I mean oh don't worry while you're talking to mr. protects you himself okay call them at 7:30 to five ish fi ve is H I think yeah fibers tell them to child sentiment this is getting worse by the second what will we do without so far people cannot get along that's right that's why the Torah teaches us if you as fashion be simpler sorry boys that's my private line hello hello is this mr. freebus there there's no Phoebus here my name is five-ish I'm sorry mr. favish wha ah mr. president Wow are you speaking to the president Shh what well mr. president moved well mr. presidential miss let me not ask what my country can do for me let me ask what I can do for my country well so let me cut right to the chase you see your friend Charles who you know the guy with the curly slide locks oh sure ma'am Eko yeah that's right Schwimmer micro ah so it must be important I assume you're aware of the situation plaguing our nation with a peculiar sadness sensation so in summation so what I'm saying is that your country needs you mr. feverish intelligence tells us that you and your associates have not been affected by this outbreak now I don't see why or how but but you see we need you your country needs you and the world needs you it's [Laughter] excuse me please yes so can you well you see mr. president does sir I'm just a regular $5 bill I don't know if I can do this now fathers listen to me before you panic I want to assure you that you have the full resources of the United States government and your disposal Major General Thomas Haley will be arriving soon at your destination and he'll take care of all your needs okay so don't move now I gotta take this click Prime Minister Putin is [Music] Wow [Music] Major General Thomas Haley reporting for duty sir mr. five is sir we need to get moving sir at ease general no he has more pins on his shirt than my mother has on her Shadle head this is an urgent matter of national security sir no time for ease sir okay how quickly can you get us to India Indiana no no India permission to speak freely sir oh of course granted sweet Corner Alabama what are y'all gonna be doing in India sir we don't have the time now let's get on the plane shabbos is coming very soon I'll explain everything on the way up up we jet away can't believe my eyes on a special quest shoot across the sky the world was zapped of semca only sadness and fuss nothing happy left now it's up to us imagine getting up on the wrong side of the bed every single morning I go loopy in the head think about the good and it won't happen to you by emissions control let's see what you can do we're gonna travel around picking up all who are down there's good and everything and that is why we sing let's make everybody happy as can be this good and everything and that is why we sing let's make everybody happy can be it's all in your head even if you're sad you will blow it away for and all your sadness happiness is here to stay make everybody happy as can be [Music] well now that you put it that way father sir I'm honored to be on this mission sir well so many people and toes yes sir we are about to land an Indian sir we need to go to the main Indian call center Center and how are we gonna find it one second and all you leave a keishon station to the station for your vacation since nobody wants to have any fun in the Sun please this is slender metal Oh Marsh let my methyl I need your help you see I'm an Indian now hello I am - Charles asked me to come to India to take you very quickly and bring you to Bangladesh it's called Santa Thank You Todd sir everyone in five ish what are we doing here yeah five ish how are we going to bring some hug to the world from here yeah this doesn't look like a happy place those scrawny cows look like they jumped right out of paruz worst nightmare don't worry you see here in India they speak to more Americans than anyone in America does this call center services almost every single fortune 500 company you ever heard of if we get them to tell a market a little bit of simcha the whole world should be happy in no time we need everyone to hang on the phone now father she's here on an important mission of national security my name is Raj I am the supervisor of the call center we can do technical support for Microsoft Dell Obama care Citibank Delta kars4kids and kosher delight I understand you may be having an issue be quick because we have an overwhelming influx of cranky colors okay so you see there is this evil terrorist who had attacked the happiness of the whole world we need your team to telemarket happiness to the world and I assume I will be supervising ah of course certainly sir it would be my honor to come to your assistance let me demonstrate how we can solve this issue effectively we will ascertain the cause of this depression and bring joy to them quickly hello this is Steven from Microsoft technical support what maybe your issue today and carrying about a recent purchase of a new v-max what made the problem be today sir you see I was listening to the video and I heard a commercial that said if I wanted to be happy I needed a brand new Z mark and the new operating system freezes excessively and it seems is making me more sad than I should be please fix it now first kind sir I need to ascertain that the system's electrical connection is firmly connected with your local electrical port on the wall of your house you see true happiness comes from the outside not from what's inside so it must appear the operating system I don't understand sir it's the plug in the wall yes and I'm still not happy then close your eyes and imagine your own boat sailing away while I play you some soothing old music imagine it now Parviz sir I believe we need to abort this part of the mission sir but maybe we can try once more let's go oh all right what do we do now five-ish yeah general Hayley is looking a little impatient yes favi sir we'd plan sir now sir let's go to California to visit my friend Jeff he knows more about Somoza than anyone I know off we go favish to LAX International sir [Music] lady [Music] oh man that's killing my vibes man wow that's a total downer Jeff how are you hey I know you bro fly mesh so do you know what's been going on no man I've been totally strung out I'm not sure how I feel but my guitar can tell you let's hear it the honey although on the other side the grass looks so much green then this plane came and killed the whole vibe man dude the whole coast has just been totally toast these days I've even tried reading this pamphlet that I got from this guy gives tadakatsu called finding happiness when everyone else is sad oh wait wait wait here is even a better one he gave me gave me a bunch finding happiness when the whole world has been zapped by a chemical that turns everyone sad man they think of books for everything these days Bobby's shirt Jeff doesn't seem like he's going to help much sir oh no this is way more serious than I thought I knew we couldn't do this things always end bad and just when we thought it couldn't get worse we have the worst luck in the universe Oh No five-ish what are we going to do hold on to your yarmulkes and wipe those frowns off your faces help doesn't come from traveling to all these exotic places it comes from Hashem we need to keep our Batak own general take us to Miami yes sir by FISH I'm not feeling so well all this flying is making me a little woozy and hungry you think slow mo metal wouldn't arrange a special culture meal for you look under your six you mean this red button don't sir [Music] hello gentlemen and welcome to the carriage Club who you here to visit my friend cousin trogir Fievel haha sir he's right down the hall in the synagogue preparing for the kiddush tomorrow m'angil m'angil it's like a professional ranch over here you know last week there was so glue pieces I'm hearing underplayed in so many toothpicks it was like going with her gosh Matt's here in the in devout cousin house in cousin cousin swagify ha Kaiser has it I heard you deter time you don't need to yell We Need to Talk let's go for a little spat seein by the boardwalk that's it's just too many mishegoss thing going on here so what brings all you find gentle people to visit me cousin you have spent your whole life bringing people joy with your singing I don't know if you noticed but the world is under attack under attack what do you mean under attack what is under the stylish some evil terrorist 'im have polluted the water with a chemical that makes everyone sad oh ye tacky I know this is this morning mister get him but you know you French leave a message that his father yen's day Limburg he was manage such a crutch this morning when I started singing by kedusha so we thought that maybe you can teach us how to bring simcha to others you know in today's world none of the young stems appreciate what it takes to make people happy they drowned their voices a little bit put in that computer and then out comes your swellow's blot with all those smartphones you're not so smart after all let's go back inside I forgot to put up the show anyways I'm gonna go what sir Joan what you look so confused for I used to try Yankee Doodle Dandy that you put hot dogs and ketchup in your chow I like hot dogs in my challenge oh yeah Brooke you know they're heel keys are making someone happy I'm Scottish and you know what the keytar good shadowy dishes good troll with Google and Kiska yup chick of course do you like Charlie do you like do you like it like it did it oh can't wait for Shabbos Chavez Chavez cha-cha-cha cha-cha-cha like yeah the turkey [Music] dr. Fink Rumson do you want to see the rotten fruits of our labor hey speaking of rotten fruits let's check out that fruit store down the block it's always packed with frolicking children shopping for Shabbos sweets gentlemen how about a glass of water you look dehydrate Thank You boss hey I feel so sad why do I feel so sad I'm always so happy I only make $4 an hour what that's minimum wage I want to go home to my mom in Guatemala effect work almost instantaneously supporting one hello do you buy any of shield pastors have any more of the Gish Mackey Takanashi I bought last week hey rabbi we only have sour stick-slip sour connection with the sour mrs. Sawyer sour now she's supposed to be sweet zcu district into work and as this a Shabbos cottage needs ISA nosh come on tell me whatever happened to choo-choos huh but where's the church shoes now it's our 6:00 hour where's our ball everything is sour sour sour one even you look sour today what happened look ribbies here I knew he'd be here oh I don't think I did so well on my hummus test this week you guys talk Rebbe there's a huge problem the whole world lost their sim ha yeah and Jeff couldn't help and neither could shrug a 5 ha ha sir though this killing song sort of got me going a little bit sir the answer to the simcha problem is not in the gunam and it's not in showing and especially not in choo-choos the will these things pick an elbow the ultimate simcha comes only from Tyra because ASL user name made Samus a wave so what do we do we need the ice golem from afters you swirl to make an Asifa leg can I ease as colour you hold it we will teach them it doesn't matter if you Joe the Plumber or if you I'm rubbed a bit to see PA you need to hear that Tyra is the Z staff no the best is ask a safer will they'll be serving Tampere sir an Asifa is a big event for everyone to come and get together on such short notice sir oh I'm sure slow my metal can pull it off doc are you hearing what I'm hearing yes let's see according to my calculations the force of the energy of their happiness of so many people who will disrupt the chemical effect we need to counter plan before our hard work goes kaput if you can slowly pass the security and get me to the podium I am confident I could promote the virtues of being miserable I sickly need to fly in dr. Rajesh puckish to help bypass the security system after all these years a former security experts himself okay okay I get happy knock a fine week - you too sir guys we have a big asifa to attend tomorrow morning come let's go to the chill zone to learn Torah good five-ish there is so much to do I don't know if I can concentrate on learning now Mandy like rabbi steinberger always says if it's in your reach it's in your grasp Tyra can be learned anytime even when it's Kusha card but I never win any of the raffles stupid man bottom line a very special thank you to cut in half Iser solar gesund sign their shows kuvira Bonham man he game as Conan and call Cal Hakadosh has there we have the source to hear some different physic from a special guest from arity throw her a Brahma is a lotta rabbit I you think to the reasons but joy and happiness certificate on once Kilcher California simple you think challenges sake schmuck well it's not each and every bean in half tens of profit missions lurking inside you could not fun my reply used to say I wish to spend my eat yet the scale is about stringencies when in doubt don't just don't do it everything should be like everyone this this Rav Rama that's what he is is a rabbit looks lucky the Rama he's a terrorist and who is this Averill fraud this is not what toy is about Tyra's ease there is beautiful Lanham it's at North nut you don't know what they're talking about yes I do we all need to learn tyro we need to dance with simpatico you're on it quick doctor let's get out of here yeah happiness is prevailing let's go kids we just stand as a smorgasbord I guess a McNasty pastrami to die for goodbye now and you could lock in the scepter my only goodbye [Music] Oh [Music] learning in the special fiber sway