Shaar HaBitachon Lesson 45 with Rabbi Shais Taub

we are concluding chapter seven of shadow bittorrent and the entire shah emir hashem if you remember for context we are in the middle of enumerating a progression of ten total ten phases of beta through a person's life uh we we covered nine out of the ten and it started from the first most rudimentary level where the infant has been talking in his mother's ability to to nurse him and that's as far as what he knows that is all the security in the world is his mother nursing him and then he's weaned and he graduates from that to having been talking in his mother procuring things for him and then he realizes well hold on maybe it's my father you know my father pays the bills and then he says hold on it's not my mother or my father it's me and my ability to work and then he says no no it's not my ability to work it is um the the benevolence of the of of the employers the wealthy people who even if i can't work maybe they'll still take care of me and then finally i think that's five levels finally he realizes you know what everyone relies on god i'm just going to rely on god but he only relies on god for the things that are clearly out of human control then he ups his game and he starts relying on hashem even for things that technically you can control or it seems like you have more control and then he gets to a point where he relies completely on hashem and now he's only working because that's how hashem wants people to do things and then he gets to the level we said the ninth level is the last thing we did where remember that what we said last night it was so powerful and i was thinking like i just want to make a sign and put this up the indian i never got up in a particular situation this have and yearned to be in a different situation or a different state of affairs wow and that was level nine level nine was where whatever your life is right now perfect for now for now obviously we can we can hope and if we have the talking we do hope and and we we talk good vid we look forward to tava nirva where it's easy to see and obvious to see but for now right now at this moment whatever's going on pleasure or pain whatever it is it's perfect it's perfect for this moment wow wow that that that was the that was level nine and we're still progressing there's still another level there's a level which we didn't cover yet but uh can you believe that there's still another level higher than that what's it gonna even be how can there be a higher level than that yeah all right so we're gonna we're gonna do level 10. when his concept of hashem matures develops even further okay we're getting to the highest level remember we described this as a cognitive development he's he's maturing in his world view in his understanding of reality so when he gets to the highest level of maturity love he understands the purpose for which he was created and brought into this fleeting world he calls it a transient world a world of passing things so he begins to recognize his purpose what am i doing what am i doing here the yakira miles and he comes to recognize the advantage of the other world which exists forever so he starts to put into perspective the relative value of this world compared to the next world and what will happen then at this point this is the highest level of maturity he will become disgusted by this world and its means meaning the stuff you got to do in this world to get by in this world and then he will surrender himself commit himself to hashem with his thought and with his body is and he will delight in remembering hashem when he's alone when he's by himself and he'll feel empty when not reflecting on his greatness so this is higher than level nine level nine was whatever that the total medistavos equanimity total stoicism where stoicism doesn't mean like people think like a cow you know like a cold fish stones as a means equanimity medicives that was level nine level 10 is that it gets beyond that where where it's like he has this pleasure in his relationship with hashem not just that this world doesn't you know he doesn't care anymore what toppings are on the pizza okay he graduated from that which is a big deal to not care what toppings are on the pizza okay especially when you told them especially which toppings you wanted and then they didn't listen okay it's not about the topics about the principle if you would have told me which toppings you don't want i would have listened okay anyways told us how to deal with interpersonal relationships right okay anyway level nine was this world is fine it's great where however however hashem serves it is fine level 10 is even more than that where he develops this pleasure in his connection with hashem so it's not just that he feels ambivalent about this world he feels intense pleasure excitement bliss i mean insidious we call it ava batanoogam which is a turn of phrase from shirahashiram that the love poem that shlamella wrote when he wanted to describe the relationship between the jews and god but he just he has pleasure in his connection with hashem now i want to explain a little something right here in the light of siddhis because when you say something like ye must be he's disgusted by this world i think it can give the wrong impression and remember when we told the story um remember i don't remember how many lessons ago it was somebody maybe you pull up the archives but remember i told you the story that hitler parachute used to tell the story about the yid who got the body of the maaram out of he ran him to the body not during the madame's life but after madame passed away then he was able to get the body and give it a jewish burial remember that story yeah for those who don't remember it but i'm going to tell very very big sir but he was rewarded he could either go to the madame's level in garnetin or he could become wealthy and he chose uh the heaven instead of the the money and uh hillapatcha the great mashbee used to tell that story and ask people so what would you do and they all said oh we would take the heaven as well he said the heaven would only benefit you but with the money you think about how many mitzvahs you could do so i want to i want to make a point here when we say that he has no care for this world he doesn't you know doesn't attract him actually let me not mince words it didn't say he's not attracted to this world it says he's disgusted by this world what does that mean he's disgusted by it the abhishek created alam hazard to be a dirty so how's he going to be disgusted with the world that the abhishek decided should be his dira and the baby the physical world when the eden made the mishkan and the midbar hashem was all excited about about coming into his garden the garden is a place of pleasure so if hashem thinks this world is a beautiful place or at least potentially a beautiful place then how we're going to be disgusted with this world so here's the point when it says he's disgusted by this world it means when it's just this world for its own sake when it's just physical things for no other greater purpose then yeah that's disgusting to him that's disgusting what's it all about i mean you have things and you enjoy them for what for what what's the value what's the redeeming value so to him that's disgusting now now if you would tell him you're going to use this physical world to do mitzvahs and make it him he would not find that disgusting of course not of course not he would find that beautiful but what this clarity comes to this talks about this a lot exists but like in tanya especially competitive it talks about the about this world for its own sake you know physicality physical pleasure for its own sake for nothing more than its own sake is that's clipper that's right but then of course it also speaks about how you use the physical world to to make adidas so that's that's the best thing that's the greatest thing um that that's yusun that's the the advantage of light from darkness that's even greater than the godliness that's in heaven is the godliness that's on earth when we when we use the physical world to serve hashem but the point is physicality just for its own sake no that is disgusting to him that's a that's not just he's above it not just he's not attracted to the pizza toppings the discussion the whole discussion is is revolting to him like who could talk about who could care about such things when there's something so much greater like incomparably so much greater than pizza tops and toppings is is our connection with hashem so anything that's not connected to hashem is a distraction from that and it and therefore he's disgusted by it i understand but this is not like i want to make it clear you know it doesn't mean that he has to walk around with a frown all the time like fat yeah gross disgusting all right but this this clarity we get from this you know see this well i'll tell you there's a hayemye in one of my favorite hygiene names that says that there are three different approaches to life one of them tells us how uh great spirituality is spirituality means the abstract the the world of ideas but it's called surah and and that approach that world view is called sometimes translated as jewish philosophy it says there's another approach that tells us how disgusting physicality is um and that's called musu and then there's a third approach that says one hashem made both the spiritual and the physical and that here's the part that i love one hashem made both the physical and the spiritual and it explains the importance of the physical when it is imbued with spiritual meaning as well as the importance of spirituality to be manifest in physical form and that approach is called siddhis that not only physicality needs spirituality but spirituality needs physicality ultimately you know you have ideas and things ideas are abstract things are concrete not only does every concrete thing need an abstraction a spiritual value in order to give it meaning but also conversely every abstraction every value every idea that's a worthy idea needs to be manifest in the physical world and that's the whole idea of 613 mitzvahs we're not we were not you know we're not doing 613 meditations like the spies in the desert they didn't want to go into the land because they they thought they could have judaism as as a total abstraction they didn't need to implement it in the physical world no judaism has to be implemented in the physical world so certainly on this 10th level we're not talking about somebody who's disgusted by he's disgusted by to the country because he appreciates the idea it's such a misappropriation therefore to use physicality for something other than that and that's revolting to him yeah does that make sense is that helpful and if he is in great assemblies of people he will desire only to do what is pleasing to hashem in other words no amount of peer pressure can get to this guy because that's it all he cares about is what hashem wants now obviously he's not a misanthrope he's not a person who's like oh i only care about hashem i can be mean to people no you can't because those are god's kids so you got to be good to people but you be good to people because that's how you be good to your maker and we've spoken about this many times in shadow of a token so i won't go over it again but if if you want to hear it again just listen to 44 previous classes and it's in a couple of them and he only yearns to meet him that's all he yearns for he just wants to meet hashem he wants every moment of his life to be a spiritual experience an intimate spiritual experience he wants to have that feeling of being together with hashem in everything that he does and the joy he takes in love of hashem will supersede in his own experience the joy that worldly people take in this world can you believe he enjoys his relation with hashem more than worldly people enjoy this world all the pleasures of this world that worldly people enjoy he enjoys his relationship with hashem more than the worldly people enjoy the world but i want to tell you something even more here's the bigger kiddish not only does he enjoy his relationship with his young more than worldly people enjoy the world but furthermore he enjoys his relationship with hashem more than the spiritual people enjoy the world to come that is whoa you hear that you hear that that blew me away not only does he enjoy his relationship with hashem more than worldly people enjoy the world he enjoys his relationship with hashem more than spiritual people enjoy the world to come here we're talking about three categories now tu bala taiva and a selfless person what do i mean what's a baltiva a hedonist a pleasure seeker there's two kinds of hedonists material hedonists and spiritual hedonists so the material hedonist enjoys this world you know the toppings on the pizza or the new car smell or you know whatever it is then there's a spiritual hedonist what's a spiritual hedonist spiritual hedonist to somebody who enjoys tai nugei the pleasures of the world to come and trust me when i tell you the pleasures of the world to come put to shame the pleasures of this world and yet this third category this really selfless person he's not into either of those pleasures not even the spiritual pleasures you know about the altar yeah the balatanya so apparently he was in a state of devacus profound attachment with with hashem and they overheard him speaking to hashem in yiddish and you understand davening is in latin kurdish but now then he was speaking to hashem so he's speaking the mahmolotion so he's speaking to hashem and he says i don't want your your paradise i don't want your world to come i just want you well and by the way you want one of my favorite my modem from the rabbit which is a mimer from udall offensive for the rebbe's birthday rabbit speaks there he tells the rabbit tells this story and basically says that this is attainable by every one of us that we can all attain this level and never talks about you know the person who is enticed by spiritual rewards and and how you have to resist that because it's a distraction that just like worldly pleasures are a distraction ultimately spiritual rewards are also a distraction and you have to just keep your eye on the prize he compares it to i mean it's it's a medusa it's a mushroom from the medici about a bunch of people were admitted to the palace and this guy got distracted in in the lobby because he was interested in the popcorn machine or whatever the the miss pac-man uh arcade game or whatever it is they had i'm just thinking about the rich people's houses i've been in where they have popcorn machines and miss pac-man machines okay so i'm imagining a palace a king would have these things in his lobby you know and then but so that guy got distracted there he didn't get further that then but then the other guys kept going but then the next guy he got distracted because you know he got to the to the dining room he saw this piece of art on the wall whatever some fancy piece of art and then the next guy got a little bit further i'm updating the marshall a little bit the next guy got a little bit further and he got distracted by i don't know whatever the kappa de monte clown they bought in the okay i don't know i don't know nice things oh faberge egg the faberge egg okay and then the next guy got to the next level next but each one would get distracted by some other finery or or luxury at each level and one guy just kept his head down he kept marching until he made it to the innermost chamber and he made it to the king so you know the person who graduates from caring which toppings he has on his pizza that's great but don't stop keep going get to the point where you're not even interested in the pleasures of the world to come now does it mean that the pleasures of the world become aren't pleasurable no of course they're pleasurable and they're great and they're beautiful but that's not the motivation in serving hashem the motivation is the connection i just want you i just want my connection with you someone's asking what's the memory called it's called the game on the 11th day that happens birthday is the 11th day of nissan and this is it starts off talking about the nasi uh the nasi of usha the tribe of usher that brought their corbin on the 11th day a great mimer absolutely just mine mind blowing stuff in there i choose the king yeah that's what it's called in english they called it i choose the king that's right yeah 100 that is it okay i choose the king very good all right let's keep going this is the highest level among those who trust that of the prophets the pious and hashem's pure elite uh and i told you that ebba says we could attain this level so see what the labacher opinion of of the jewish people is that we're all ready to be hashem's pure elite school of schola and this level of desire is what's described in the verse even in the path of your judgments hashem we wait for you for you the soul's desire is for your name and recollection the armor and it says my soul thirsts for hashem for the living god that's it nothing that he can do for me not materially not even spiritually i just want him now obviously when i just want him it tends to work out rather well both materially and spiritually but that's not my motivation i don't care about any of that stuff anymore i just want him no more user relationship okay these are the ten levels of trust one who trusts will inevitably be on one of these levels i'll go back to what i said in the first lesson that the great jewish poet bob dylan said you got to serve somebody you may be the devil it may be the lord but you got to serve somebody everyone has been talking in something and he took us through ten levels the most immature infantile one the person who has been talking in his mother's nursing home and then you graduate from that and then you have it talking in your mother and you'll be talking in your father they've been talking in your ability to work for a job then you've been talking in rich people then you'll be talking in hashem but only for things that are too hard for people to do then you've been talking to for for things that are just a little bit inconvenient to do and then you'll be talking in a chef for everything and then you have no preference for anything in this world and then all you want is hashem but the point is everyone's on one of these 10 levels so the question is where are you at right now where are you at and which level can you reach today every one of us is on one of these 10 levels can we reach a higher level today than we were at yesterday that's that's that's the only question and i hope through the study of shadow talking that we may have upgraded i feel i've upgraded i hope that's how you feel um we found the idea of trust expressed in the language of scripture in 10 different terms corresponding to these 10 levels and they are 10 words or 10 synonyms for italkin you know i bought the world's worst thesaurus not only was it terrible it was terrible i think i told that joke already by the way after 45 classes some of my jokes are going to get repeated anyways here are the 10 synonyms for betahn which correspond to the 10 levels it's interesting you know they say the eskimos have well it's a made-up thing it's been disproven so i can say any number i want do you know 98.3 percent of statistics cited by rabbis in classes are made up on the spot anyway there are the eskimos they say have 14 words for snow because snow is important to them so therefore they have a lot of words for it anyway we have ten words this is called linguistic relativism and determinism they go hand in hand does a culture have a lot of words for the things they value or do they value the things they have a lot of words for discuss okay linguistic relativism and determinism so two theories that go together anyways in lush in hakodish we have ten words for betaken and they correspond to the ten levels of the token so let's do it okay um the saver um those are the ten levels you say no here's a here's a thrilla here's a tv beneath hashem in his mercy set us among those who trust in him who surrender both outwardly and inwardly to his judgment amen nislamit the gate of trust is completed for hashem the last and the first somebody points out here in the private chat that ebba set to learn it from time to time yeah so we while we may have been upgraded once we can use an upgrade again that is true okay so first of all soulwords.org trust and you can watch these classes over and over and over again but yeah definitely we do need to constantly go over these concepts so here's what i want to do um we're going to have one more class not text-based we've bought hashem finished the text but monday night hashem let's have a uh a shahrukh bhattachan siem celebration slash fabregan we'll take your questions for discussion mazel tov to everybody and uh thank you very very very much for joining together on this this journey okay we'll see you we'll see you for one more class