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[Music]
You see
your tomorrow
[Music]
Okay. Hi everybody. Thank you for
coming. And uh today's shar is dedicated
as always praying for victory of our
soldiers on all the fronts of the war.
As all of you know, of course uh the
prime minister is planning on expanding
uh the warfront to encompass all of
Gaza. So this is still a man of tila and
for the lasting unity of the people of
Israel and for all of those whose health
has been affected by the war and the
safe return of rasm of all of the
hostages. A rafu of for Ben Freda Batia
Batara and the lasting unity and safety
of the people of Israel. Safe return of
the soldiers and hostages. recovery of
the wounded and shalom
al and again a third yet a third an
anonymous contribution was again once
again made for
the and for the safe return of the
hostages and hashem's protection of
Israel and for the
ga vimeu
and uh we desperately need the ga uh we
have uh this week a double para because
in kadoshim which is normally the case
uh when you have a non- leap year so you
have extra pario that you got to you got
to combine uh so I do want to share one
thought from parat which is the first
para and then a longer thought from
parasian
uh which is the second para uh para mo
is actually very very interesting it
deals with the yum kiper ritual it
actually deals with the coen god going
into the holy of holies the keshak
dashim Yum kipper and itffect how how he
affects atonement uh for quali Israel
actually there's a very interesting just
as a little aside a very interesting of
the vil nagon
which if you wouldn't read the pukum
carefully you wouldn't even notice it
but once he points it out it becomes
obvious and that is if you read
paraote it talks about a whole ritual
two goats going into the holy of holies
And as you're reading it, your mind
automatically says, "Oh, this is talking
about Jam
Kipper because it is." And yet, Yam
Kipper is not mentioned until the very
end of the description in which it says,
"And this shall be the service of Yum
Kipper for all future generations."
So the vil nagon is makadesh based on a
metric that for the 40 years of the
desert when iron was the cohen
gdado he could enter the keshak dashim
any single day he wanted to provided he
went through the entire elaborate ritual
that is described it is only it is only
for the future generations that this
avod is limited to yam kipper and again
if you just Look at the pukim. This will
literally leap out at you. Although you
wouldn't notice it because our mind
supplies a lot of things that are not in
the text and we just assume it's in
there. But in point of fact when it
describes Aon going into the holy of
holies, it does not mention Yumiper. And
the vagon says that could be into the
keshim. And some commentaries explain
that because exemplified the
characteristic of oal shalom, the lover
of peace, the pursuer of peace. That
gave him aus that every single day for
him had the holiness of yam kipper which
allowed him to enter the kadeshakum.
very very interesting and as I say it's
one of those that once you hear it it's
you almost it's not a kdish it's it's
exactly what the puss is saying but
among the yum kiper rituals that are
described the most mysterious if we were
to ask like what is the greatest atoner
of yum kipper what is the aspect of the
service that brings the greatest kapor
so you're tempted to think well when the
ken guttle goes into the keshak Dashim.
That's the big deal. Well, that is a big
deal of course, but that is not the most
powerful avoda of Yum Kipper. The most
powerful avoda of Yam Kipper did not
even take place in the Ba Mikdash at
all. Well, it started off in the Ba
Mikdash, but then it ended. Say again.
In the sky. What? What do you
Well, yeah, but I'm talking about Kipper
is the ritual of the two goats. The
goats the rim. The two goats. What is
this ritual? Right, the ritual is that
Aron the Coen Guttle or whoever the Coen
Guttle is takes two goats. The two goats
have to look the same, be the same
color, be the same size, be the same
age, etc. He draws lots. One goat will
be a sacrifice to
God. So Lashem whose blood will it'll be
slaughtered in the temple and its blood
will be brought into the
kodesakashim. The other goat is called
sir la
aazel. The
goat that goes to a zazel. Now aazelle
actually means it's a strange word. It
means the demons of the desert in which
not the coin guttle but somebody else
walks the goat around 10 miles out from
the city 12 meal in a place of
desolation and emptiness and throw
pushes the goat over the cliff and the
goat dies and the goat as it were bears
all of the s it's a very strange
description the goat bears the sins of
the People like the Coen Guttle put his
hands on the goat in the B mikdash and
somehow all of the sins of Claw Israel
enter the goat and when the goat is
thrown over the cliff and the goat dies
all of the sins disappear. Now that is
the most powerful atonement of Yam
Kipper. Not even the goat that goes to
God but the goat that goes to Aazel
scapegoat. Now it's called the
scapegoat.
Now the rabbitic term for the
scapegoat is not the same term as the
kumsh calls it the goat to
aazel called
it
hamish the goat that is sent away. Now
if you think about this for a moment you
can see Kazal wanted to use a much more
pariff term the goat that's sent
away raises all sorts of theological
problems what we're bringing sacrifices
to demons that inherit inhabit the
desert and that's what we do on yum
kiper and that is what brings atonement
to kalisrael that sounds mighty close to
idolatry and superstition and the notion
that the sins get transferred to the
goat like sins are this physical poison
that the goat takes and the goat dies
and the sins disappear. So because
theologically most people wouldn't
understand this in fact we we don't
really understand it. So Kazal
deliberately picked a term that's less
loaded although that doesn't explain
anything but they called it the goat
that you send away. They didn't want to
use Zaz because of its repercussions.
But I want to spend a few moments just
analyzing on a very very simple level
what the
SAT represents.
Ramban who was of course a great
cabalist know didn't hear you. Question
Ramb was a doctor only. Ramban was a
doctor also. Yeah. That's correct.
Mubarak. He was a mubar. Of course. No,
he didn't have the itself didn't know
the right I'm talking about Ramban.
Okay. Ramban was a great Ramban. No,
neither of them had the Zoro. The Zoro
was not published until later. But
Ramban was a mubel. Kabala and Zo are
not the same thing. Uh there were great
makubalim before the zor became for
some. Ramban was absolutely a cabalist.
And the Ramban uh writes very very often
in his commentary of the Kish that he
will be offering interpretations al
based on the secrets of the Torah and he
uh adjures he swear makes the reader
swear that when he reaches those points
the reader will skip it unless he's on
the Madrega to study Cabala. So Zor and
Cabala are not the same thing. Zoir
became the major text of Kabala. But
there were great makubalim.
No, I I
understand right. Okay. Sorry. Yeah. I I
listen I I understand but uh I'm not
going to get into the I am not going I
am not going to get into the debate when
was the zo written. Let's assume if
wrote the zoa. Okay. I will I will go
with the conventional accepted approach.
But it is still a dra pashett that the
zor was not known to the rishonim until
around the the late 1200s. And that that
that is historically true. So the ramban
did not have the zoher. Uh yeah the zor
existed but it existed in a concealed
form. Uh the ramb was not a makubel.
Okay. Ramban definitely was a makubel.
And there was a great cababalistic
tradition in Spain and in France and in
Italy uh way before the zora became
public and way before the Arizal
hundreds of years uh before before the
Arizal. So alpabala the Ramban explains
that the
sorish is called a shad a bribe that you
give the satan a bribe that you give the
satan. And the mushel that's given is
this. Let's imagine you want to see the
king. But the king has vicious attack
dogs. If you try to get into the palace,
the dogs are going to attack you. So all
burglars know uh that they carry some
raw steak with them. And when the dog
attacks, of course, a well-trained
attack dog can overlook it, but the
average dog, you know, uh will go for
the meat. And therefore the meat
distracts the dog and therefore you're
able to have access to the king. So says
the ram on we have access to God to give
us forgiveness to give us elevation. But
there are so many demonic forces that
try to block us. They are called in fact
the uses the
phrase the arrogant dogs that try to
stop us. So the shad the
is the shad the bribe the beef steak
that you throw to the dogs. So they get
distracted from their kit from their
prosecution to God and that gives you
access. Now the truth of the matter is
it's a it's a very vivid mushel but it
still from a rational standpoint does
not make a lot of sense to us that you
have to distract demonic forces
otherwise God is not going to listen to
you. What exactly is that? So Rev.
Destler
uh had a very interesting koak. Rav
Desler was also a person who learned
Kabala Muser all of the different
branches of Torah. But Destler maintains
that even mystical ideas can and should
be translated into psychological and
ethical terms that you can apply to your
muser. And here is what Dustler defined
as a shad. Literally it means a bribe to
the satan. So Rabbustler says the
following. The way this translates
psychologically is that you know there's
a mitzvah in the Torah, a strange
mitzvah that when you surround a city in
time of war, you must give the enemy an
avenue of escape. You cannot surround a
city on all four sides. Why is that so?
Why should I give enemy an avenue of
escape? So Ramban gives a psychological
reason because when people have no
avenue of escape, they fight with
extreme
ferocity. An avenue of escape, I'm not
going to fight so much because you know
I can get out. I have a way out. That's
what they say with aliyah too, right? If
you want if you want to really be
committed to Israel, you got to burn
your bridges because if you have an
escape route, yeah, you know, you're not
going to be willing to ride with the
with the difficult waves. Now, so
Destler, the same way if the enemy is
totally blocked, they're going to fight
with unbelievable ferocity. The Yates is
the same way. When you try to kill your
Yates, it will assert itself
tremendously powerful. So example a
person
decides they they want to do chuva
uh for
lashara. So they say from this day
forward I will never say another word of
lashara for the rest of my
life that's trying to destroy
the what's going to happen is there'll
be a powerful feeling welling up within
you meaning you mean the rest of my life
next 10 years 20
years 30 years whatever may a viram
shana. How is that possible? I can't do
it. Maybe I'll start
tomorrow. This is called the notion of
the sahara will try to attack you if you
try to kill it. But ribbustler says
sometimes you have to play mind games.
You say okay I won't speak lashhara till
12:00 noon today.
I can hold out for three or four hours
and the HR is not going to bother you so
much because you've made a
concession. But what happens is as you
get yourself habituated in good habits,
you'll actually have greater resolve
later. Right? So thus points out the
mystical idea of a bribe to the satan is
a psychological mechanism for
approaching chuva incrementally.
peace meal and giving concessions like a
pressure cooker, letting the steam out a
little bit so you don't explode. You try
to take on too much of a global
uh change in your life. What's going to
happen is there'll be an explosion.
Right? So that's that's an interesting
gloss on the
Ramban. But I want to mention quickly
before I go on to the the main thing I
want to talk about some other points
about the scapegoat and that is
Rafersh points
out that if you look at the two goats
from the perspective of the goats right
so goat number one that's designated the
goat of God its uh throat is going to be
slit and its blood is going to be
collected and it'll be brought into the
holy of holies and it will be burnt and
all of this is in the visual field of
the other goat who's going to go on a
long walk. Now, from the perspective of
a goat, the goat sees
uh his twin goat as serving God, but
that is destructive and leads to death,
but I'm having a great time. I'm going
on a ramp for miles and miles and miles.
So, re points out this shows us the
illusion of a freedom from a life of of
commitment to God. Meaning we sometimes
think oh if I commit myself to God I'm
creating slavery I'm creating
deprivation I'm creating hardship but if
I reject God I have peace and joy and
freedom but your first points out that
goat of vazel may have the illusion of
freedom but ultimately is going to be
pushed off the cliff not dedicated to
anything and therefore it reminds a
person that what looks like freedom in
the short
run turns out to be darkness and
destruction in the long run and what
looks like
deprivation in the short term leads to
redemption and connection to God in the
holy of holies and the keshaktashan. So
the ritual of the goats refers says is
to focus our mind on looking at the
long-term picture. In the short term,
all sorts of things appear to be really
really good and yet they ultimately lead
to that which is death and darkness and
destruction and things that the short I
think there's a famous psychological
experiment nothing to do with Judaism.
Well, indirectly it does but it's was
not a Jewish experiment about the notion
of deferred gratification. I think it
involved marshmallows or something. What
was it? You had a choice or candy. You
had a choice. a kid kids kid little kids
had a choice of taking one now or
waiting five or 10 minutes and then they
could take two or three. So some kids
went for the immediate gratification and
some kids were willing to wait longer
for a greater reward. And they traced
these children through adulthood. And it
was found that the kids who were willing
to defer their gratification were
generally more successful in life
because they didn't go for the shortterm
gain. They looked at the long term.
Well, in many many ways, life
itself is exactly that situation. You
got to be in life for the long haul.
There are many things that in the
immediate short term would be very
advantageous. Eat where you want to eat,
travel on travel, whatever you want. In
other words, one could say mitzvah are
burdensome for me, God forbid. But if
you look at the long-term relationship,
it creates meaning and
purpose connection
to and all of those temporary
conveniences that you thought you would
gain seem to be kind of worthless,
meaningless in light of the long-term
goal here. So Rahur looks at the surak
the two goats is the path of ease and
comfort turns out to be the path of
devastation and destruction and the path
of sacrifice turns out to be the path of
holiness and consecration and union. So
that's one point about the two belts.
Another point about the two belts
focuses on the idea that they have to be
exactly the same. They have to be
exactly the same. Why is that so
significant? That highlights the idea of
free will. Because sometimes people who
sin say, "I can't help it. I was made a
certain way." You know, God gave me a
bad nature. God gave me a cruel nature.
God gave me a lazy nature. Especially
now with the human genome project where
we map and sequence all of the genetic
structures of the human organism. So
people have the lazy gene, the
disorganization gene, the violence gene,
the murder gene. Everything is
genetically programmed and people have
raised questions does know what does
that mean about free will autonomy but
obviously Judaism believes that maybe
people have different propensities
people may have different inclinations
but there is this manual override that
is called free will nobody is born to be
a Russia nobody is born to be a
sadik people make the choices that bring
them to that way. And that is
highlighted by the two goats because
there's the good goat that goes to God
and there's the bad goat that goes to
Aazel. But in essence, they are
exactly the same. The bad goat didn't
start off bad and the good goat didn't
start off good. It's what they became.
So as a result, particularly on yum
kipper, the most the most fundamental
principle of doing chuva is free will to
recognize that you're a free agent.
Because if you believe that the
trajectory of your life is determined by
your genetics or by your past or
whatever it is, you'll never take
responsibility for your life. And taking
responsibility presupposes free will.
And therefore no matter what my
circumstances I can make the right
choices I can make
choices psychology I don't know
psychology is not taught fraud young
yeah okay the past
creates psychology of the present
I'm sorry the p well well well well okay
so so this gets into something more
complicated and again I don't want to
fully address this I get to the other
thing revved makes a very important
important point. See the the way when
the Rambam describes free
will, the Rambam seems to make a
statement that any single moment in any
part of your life, you always have the
capacity to choose to be a righteous
person. Now the problem is that
sometimes a person has been led by many
many experiences in life that he's in
the street, he's in the gutter, he's an
alcoholic, he's a cocaine addict. Does
God expect that this cocaine addict in
the in the gutter uh should walk into
the base medish of Mir Yeshiva right now
and go to Adafy Mishir? I mean, is that
what God says? Why aren't you in yeshiva
right now? So, Rev Destler developed a
very subtle and sophisticated idea
called Nikuda. Nikuda sabak means there
is always a choice, but it's not the
same choice. Meaning the guy that's the
cocaine addict cannot choose at that
moment to become a fully from Jew and
God does not expect him to do that. But
there will always be a certain aspect of
choice. At this moment you can go into
treatment at this moment. You can do
something that will put you on the right
path. So it's not like every moment I
could decide to be totally righteous or
totally evil. I am a product of my past
but there is always a
nuda there is always a fulcrum point
there is always a tipping point that a
person can decide and he says and that
is our accountability meaning to say uh
let's look at look at all of us
everybody has certain areas that hashem
they passed they're no longer struggling
so for example if you're an orthodox Jew
for many years and you walk buy a pork
barbecue restaurant, whatever it is. You
know, you're not going to say, "I'm
actively struggling not to eat
pork. Maybe there was a time in your
life that you were okay, but that's not
your your test. You're past that. That's
no longer in your bira range." And all
of us also have areas that are beyond
us. meaning whatever there are certain
areas of spirituality that we're not re
really ready to choose and that's not
that's also not range meaning there's a
range a range where you're in a position
where you could go here or you can go
there some areas you're already past and
some areas you haven't gotten toler says
the judgment of God is not on everything
the judgment of God is whatever is
called in your bira range at a given
point in time. Now, as you advance
spiritually, your range will change.
Meaning more and more things may be
behind
you and you're moving in the direction
where things that were ahead of you now
become the decisions that you have to
make. So the active range of is not
static. See that that's where the Rambam
is a little difficult. The Rambam seems
to imply a very static model that every
single second I can decide to be a
completely righteous person. Rev.
Destler says the active range of free
will is an
everchanging dynamic based on how you
are progressing as a person and that is
the standard of judgment that the
almighty applies. So I so I I do agree
that obviously we are connected to our
past. Our past has a tremendous
influence on who we are and many factors
of our past were beyond our control as
well. Parents, family, whatever it would
be. But that does not negate
the and uh as I pointed out part of the
rese part of the rese of the two goats
being exactly the same is that every
person does have the capacity to be good
or or bad. But then a final point I want
to bring out is that how are the goats
chosen? They're chosen by the cohen
putting his hands in a lottery and uh
one goat will be called the the hashem
goat and the other goat is the aazel
goat and uh so it's really not the goat
making the decision. It's somebody else
making the decision. So here you have a
very interesting muser for parents and
teachers and that is the self-fulfilling
prophecy of negative
labeling. The bad goat becomes bad only
because he's labeled bad in the lottery.
And that should remind us uh very very
much that often the labels we put on
things on people become the reality of
their situation. A person becomes bad if
he's viewed as bad. A person becomes
good if they're viewed as good. Uh the
Gomorrah gives us a story that in the
aftermath of the Ba Mikdash, there were
many Jewish children who were orphaned
and they were wandering the streets and
uh there was a son of a very very great
rabbi. The rabbi had been killed and he
was a kid. So the only way he could he
could sustain himself was he became a
male prostitute.
And Rabi Yehuda Hanasi wanted to reclaim
this child because his father had been
Rabie Hanasi's own teacher. So he
reclaims the child. He says, "I'm taking
you off the street. You're going to live
with me." And then he he wanted to make
the kid a roshiva. He was a teenager.
Make him rosh. So the kid says, "How can
I be a roshiva?" He says, "I want to go
back to the street. I enjoy the street.
I'm used to the street. What type of job
are you giving me?" So ravidasi said
well how does it look if a rashiva
becomes a prostitute you can't do that
you have a you have a position you're
important you're respected in other
words it became a self-fulfilling
prophecy that because he was given
respect he was given a position he grew
into the position uh that he was and
this is how we have to deal with our
kids frankly you know um when there's
negativity uh that we're always
communicating what happens is that
becomes the reality of who who they are.
Right? So that's just some general stuff
about the soy hamish
taker service and in terms of our own
avodashem and the like. Now I want to
jump forward as I say I have two uh
unrelated pieces here uh to the
beginning of paras kadoshim uh very very
beautiful uh there we have the famous
pekka you shall love your friend as you
love
yourself and we have the this is the
mitzvah of aas is uh the mitzvah of
loving every Jew like like like you love
your like you love yourself. And let me
point out a vort which I had heard in
the name of the safer hakava hakabala
but I have not been able to find it and
I don't know who else would say it. This
is a vert that he would say but he would
say it doesn't mean he said it. As far
as I know I can't find it but this is a
very beautiful linguistic observation.
Uh one of the there are several words in
the Torah for friend. One word is
rehea is friend. The other word
is right. So, so the terra doesn't say
love
your as you love yourself. The Torah
says love your as you love yourself. So
what is the difference
between and so let's look at the shish
here friend comes from the word people
who are joined is to join.
So a is a friend who thinks like me, who
agrees with me. Everything I say he
thinks is brilliant. That's a Now rehea
which means friend strangely enough is
connected to ra bad or trua. The
chauffeur sound is a broken sound. So
rehea
represents a broken relationship meaning
a relationship in which a person does
not always agree with me. A person sees
the world in a different way. So the
Torah doesn't say love your as you love
yourself. That's obvious. I'm going to
love because the is just like me. But
the is the person who is different than
you, who sees things differently than
you. That's a person that's harder to
love. And that's why the Torah says,
"Love your rehea as you love yourself."
By the way, this is why in chevraos,
husband and wife are
called auim, beloved friends, but
not
butim. Because once again, the idea of
marriage is husbands and wives are not
supposed to be identical. Each one sees
the world in a different way, right? And
each one learns from the other. I try to
understand the way my wife sees the
world and learn from it. And hopefully
she would do the same, right? That's how
it works. And each of us becomes greater
than the sum of our individual parts
because each of us incorporates within
ourselves the vision of the other.
That's rehea, right? you're not going to
grow from because is just confirming
whatever you already know. Right? So
that's good. It's comforting to be
confirmed but uh it's not growth
producing. It's just whatever I know is
good is right with Rehea there is the
potential for growth for expansion for
insight for getting beyond. So that's
the first point again I I don't have a
source for it. The safer kaba kabala
which is a safer not many not many
people use today but it is a
phenomenally wonderful safer written in
the 19th century whose specialty is
subtlety in
language always goes through subtleties
in language so a thought like this is
right up his alley but unfortunately I I
couldn't I couldn't find it but I think
the thought itself uh is a very very
valid one. Now we also know that Rabi
comments on
this. The great
Rabbi
the theam sofur says very beautifully
that it doesn't just mean it's a
fundamental principle in the Torah but
it means it's a fundamental principle in
bringing people to Torah that if you're
a person you want to bring people to
Torah to Yiddishkite whether it's
students whether it's your own children
you want to bring them to Torah you
don't bring them to Torah by negativity
by criticism and by
denigration. You bring them to Torah by
love. And when they feel your love and
your concern, they will gravitate to
what you're teaching. And that's what it
means. This is a great principle to
bring people to Torah. And the EMS is
why did Rabi Aka say this? This emerged
from his own autobiographical experience
which is very relevant to the Omr period
and that is we know Ryativa was an
ignorant
shepherd and he was in the employ of one
of the wealthiest land owners in
Yusaleim. a landowner who went by the
name Kalba Savoa which literally means
an oversted dog because it says he was
so hospitable that even a dog would lose
its appetite. Dogs never right dogs are
always hungry but so he even the dog
would be
stuffed and he was very very balaka very
righteous person in some ways but his
daughter
Rael fell in love with this ignorant
shepherd. Aka was an ignorant shepherd
working for Kalba Sabua. Now Aka didn't
even know how to read. Didn't even know
how to read. Was he Torah observant? I'm
not even sure. We don't really know. But
he didn't know any Torah. That that's
for sure. And she saw something in him
that nobody else saw. Even Rabaka did
not see. And she married him. And her
father made a vow. Her father was so
incensed. He made a vow that she would
get nothing from him. She she he
dismared her. She would get zero. And
she lived in
poverty with Hakka, the ignorant
shepherd. And at one point, she sent him
to study Torah in your for 12 years. He
started with the first
graders. After 12 years, he already had
accomplished something. He came home to
visit her after 12 years. And this is
one of the strangest parts of the story.
And uh before he gets to say hello, he
overhears her conversation with a
neighbor where a certain neighbor says,
"What type of husband do you have who
leaves you for 12 years, doesn't come
back?" And she said, "I wouldn't mind if
you go for another 12 years." He hears
that, doesn't even say hello. Doesn't
stop for a cup of coffee. He goes back
for another 12 years. Now I have to
admit I think this hits all of us and h
okay I get maybe I get the 12 years I
get the 24 years I mean I get that if
that but can't say hello can't uh can't
have a cup of coffee or whatever they
drank tea probably tea in those days uh
so there are different interpretations
again none of these are going to fully
answer the question uh one
interpretation is that he didn't want to
break the continuity meaning even if you
have a little break That kind of takes
away the momentum. 2 * 12 is not the
same as 1* 24. So he wanted the
momentum. The other shot I like a lot is
more of a humanistic shot. If he would
have allowed himself to
stop and see her, he wouldn't have been
able to go back. He would have been
overpowered by her suffering. But she
wanted him to go back. She knew this had
to be done. So he had to be
cruel in order to do what he had to do.
Again, this is something that is totally
beyond us. Uh but this is the story. So
after 24
years, he finally comes
back and now he is no longer the
ignorant shepherd who was learning how
to read with the first
graders. He is now the greatest rabbi in
Israel, Aka Benose.
He comes back with
24,000
students. Can you imagine that? The
largest yeshiva in the world
uh is probably Mir, the mere yeshiva.
And Mir has between
8,000 maybe 9,000 students, the largest
in the
world. This 24,000
students. And this woman is dressed in
rags and she's pressing through the
crowds to see this man that's coming.
And the students think she's a crazy
woman or whatever it is. And they, you
know, block her. And Rabi Aka says,
"Shalib is
shimm all that I am and all that you are
shallah is because of her." and they get
reunited and all of the
sacrifices are now worth
it. She produced the one that would
convey the Torah to all the future
generations. Although Raika tragically
died a martyr's death later. He was
tortured but that that that was later.
Now, interestingly enough, Kalba
Sabua at this point doesn't know that is
his son-in-law. He doesn't he knows a
great rabbi came to town with 24,000
students but he but he finally regrets
all the years that his daughter was
suffering 24 years. So he wants to go
get released from his vow
released. So he was told that the
scholar could release you from your vow.
So he goes over to the scholar and says,
"You know, Rabbi, many, many years ago,
I made a vow that my daughter can have
no benefit from my property because she
married an ignorant man, but now I see
how much she's suffering. Can you
release me from the
vow?" And Rabaka, who recognized who he
was talking to, said, "Well, let me ask
you this. Would you have made the vow
had you known that your son-in-law would
become
a so he
says I wouldn't have made the vow had I
know had I known he'd learned how to
read so said you're released from your
vow and then he identified himself and
that's the story okay this is a very
very
rare example of what in many ways could
be described as a romance from the
Talmud
Now it's not romantic in the typical way
you would describe
romance but in the sense of what
motivated Rabi to
ultimately fact described that when he
was
init learned but he he
hated he hated them. He even described
if I would see a Tamil Kam I would bite
him and not like a dog bite but like a
donkey bite that breaks the
bones right a dog bite breaks skin a
donkey can break through the bones I
hated him and psychologically you can
understand that because obviously rebika
was a smart person I mean imagine the
situation where you're intelligent
you're bright but you don't have
education even you don't have education
and you see all of these Harvard
professors as it were, who maybe are not
as smart as you, but they got the
credentials and they got the degrees.
One can understand from, maybe I'm
humanizing it too much, one can
understand from a human perspective,
there's got to be a certain jealousy. I
mean, I can tell I can tell you that
there are quite a few automobile
mechanics who didn't even finish high
school who are a lot smarter than
professors at the highest levels of
academia.
uh you know they can fix cars, they can
they're they're just very very bright
but they don't have this formal
education thing uh and and the like. All
right. So in Israel it's not such a big
not not as important but in America you
know the
credentials are the end all and be all
be all of everything. So one can
understand from a human perspective
Rabaka's
hatred of Tom.
But what did what is Rael? Rael saw in
Rabi through her love of him abilities
and
potentials that he didn't even realize
that he
had. And through that love she gave him
the
confidence to be able to do what he
needed to do. So this fits the first
thought. was the love that Raal had for
me that gave me the ability to become
great in Torah and that that is now
granted this is an extreme case and you
know if any husband would want to do
this uh any rabbi in the world would
basically say user user user don't do it
this is a unique case in fact I'll tell
you an interesting story a speculation I
have which I have absolutely no proof
for so if you ask me for the source the
source is only me but there was one
rabbi in the garra Ben
Azai and the Gmorrah records he never
married because he said how can I get
married my soul desires to learn Torah
so the postrus of the Gmorrah is Benazi
didn't marry he said I can't tear myself
away from Torah learning I can't assume
a domestic life we used to call old
bachelors in yeshiva members of the Ben
Azai club no their soul desires to learn
to now to springs from the Jewish sheli
that actually Benazi I did get married,
but he got divorced. And the person he
married was none other than Rabbi Yaka's
daughter. Now, here is my speculation,
and I I like it. I think it is a very
good speculation. You're Benazi. All you
care about is learning Torah. A wife,
all those other things, they're going to
distract you. But there's a mitzvah to
get married, a mitzvah to have children.
So you have to find a wife that's going
to make no demands
whatsoever. So where do you
look? Like daughter like mother. Here we
have Rabaka's wife. She made no demands
whatsoever. Probably daughter is going
to be the same thing. I'll go with that
one. Ah problem is daughter saw
everything her mother went through. She
said, "I'm not going to live that way."
Okay, that's my that's my reconstru
that's my reconstruction as to what
happened. I think it's very very
plausible uh that that happened because
I don't have any particular proof but
the point basically is it was the power
of Rahul's love that made Rabbi Aka and
uh in fact uh this is the power of a
good wife a good wife you know behind
they'll say behind every man is a good
woman or some say a surprised
woman whatever whatever it would be okay
Now, interestingly enough
though, the same rabbi I just mentioned,
Ben Azai, Rabbi Yaka
says is the clut of the Torah, Ben Azai,
the same
Benaza's son-in-law at one point came up
with another verse that he considered to
be the most important teaching of the
Torah and that is man is made in the
image of God.
When you realize mankind, human beings
are made in the image of God. That's the
most important idea. So the malim offers
a very interesting
insight into the debate between Rabaka
and Benazi as to whether the most
important principle is
via or the most important principle is
that man is made in God's image. And he
says both of them are
focusing on
love of your fellow Jew as very
fundamental. But how do you get to the
love? So Benazi, which is consistent
with his intellectual
orientation, says you get to the love by
philosophical contemplation. I
contemplate the greatness of the human
being. You're in the image of God. So of
course I love you and I respect you
because you are a representation of
godliness. You use your mind to get to
love. Rabbi Aka's point is it is not
always your mind that gets you to the
right place. It sometimes has to be your
action because the Malin points out
the
note love to your friend towards your
friend is not referring to the emotion.
It's referring to action act in loving
ways. Benazi says the contemplation
brings you to the emotion.
Rabbi Yaka says it's the
action that brings you to the emotion.
You know marriage counselors will often
go with what Rabaka says. A person says
I don't feel love towards my
spouse. I don't feel anything. So
sometimes the answer would be will be
act as if you did. act in a loving way
and then the feelings will come instead
of looking at actions as consequence of
feelings. The feelings can come from the
actions themselves. Now of course that
feels fake initially. It does feel fake.
I'm going through
motions. But the truth is your actions
can educate your feelings. This is the
says in many many places.
A person is
influenced by his
actions. Act happy, you become happier.
Act kindly, you become kinder. The
emotions get educated by the actions.
So, Ben Azai is more of an intellectual
orientation. Contemplate the greatness
of man and you will love. Rabi Aka says,
"Forget about the contemplation. That's
not going to take you where you need to
go."
didn't fully work for Benazi himself
rather act and through the action you
become a different person in that in
that way right so that's an interesting
makus now there is a third opinion there
is a third opinion which the ana which
is quoted as part of the medish but it's
not in our medish you actually don't we
only know it from secondary sources in
which there's a third opinion who says
I'll give you a more important principle
than man is in the image of God. And the
principle that the third opinion comes
up with is you got to bring a corban in
the morning. The daily offering of the
morning and a corban in the afternoon.
The corbent of the morning, themed of
the
afternoon. Now here you scratch your
head a little bit. Well, okay, there's a
mitzvah to bring the corbent, but in
what way is that the most important
principle in the Torah? And here the
Bali Muser say the lesson is
consistency. Again, going back to moods.
You know, all of us have moods of
spirituality in which we become
spiritual and then we have moods where
we're not so excited. But the carbon
tumid's lesson is every single day you
got to bring that offering. Sometimes
you're in the mood, sometimes you're
not. Stay with it. Consistency is
something that builds religious
character. When we're creatures of
moods, some days we're doing it, some
days we're not doing it. We're simply
going with the wind. We're being blown
around. You know, I knew
the what?
Yeah, that's right. That's the ru the ru
even if you do good things because
you're doing it because you're blown
with the wind. You know, I remember um
in in my community and I remember
growing up and I remember even as an
adult as well, uh there were older
people who kind of were living in
America before they were yes. They
actually went to public schools. They
didn't have yeshiva education, but they
were like shers. They would go to schul
no matter, you know, no matter what.
This was their thing. This was their
thing. And I remember um I had a
neighbor one who lived one block over.
He was like, you know, 90 in his 90s.
And I remember him, you know, he would
walk to SH would take maybe take him a
half an hour in the middle of the winter
snow matter no matter what. I mean,
people who were 40 years younger, if
there was a little rain outside, they
wouldn't and they had a car. Uh they
wouldn't go to show. There was too much
trouble. I would get wet going into the
car from my house, etc. And here was a
person who would walk. Okay, it wasn't
10 miles, but you know, he would walk
five blocks uh through the snow with a
walker and everything else. He just and
it wasn't even a he didn't even look at
it like a sacrifice. This is just what
you do. And I always think of them as a
model of consistency. This is your job.
You just do it. And that's a very
fundamental principle because all of us
want to be spiritual. All of us want to
be ecstatic. All of us want to be
excited.
But life isn't always that way. Life has
its boring moments. Life has its
depressing moments. Life has moments
where things are not so exciting. But
you stick with it. You stick with it.
And that's the lesson of the carban
tamid. Every day, every day, no matter
what. Okay. The final point I want to
share with you is also a story in the
Gomorrah. The famous story of Hill. Uh
remember a non-Jew came to Hill very
famous well first came to Shamai and
said teach me the whole Torah when I'm
on one foot so Shami thought this
non-Jew was mocking and making fun of
Judaism and said get out of
here who was renowned for his patience
and there are a number of stories about
Hill's patience said okay I'll teach you
the whole Torah on one foot and he said
in Aramaic
anything that is hateful to you that you
wouldn't want people to do to
you. Do not do to your
friend and the rest of the Torah zil
gore. Go and learn. Now, this is often
paraphrased as the negative golden rule
because uh the positive golden rule is
do unto others as you would like them to
do unto you. This is not phrased in the
positive. This is phrased in the
negative. That which is hurtful to you,
do not do to another person. And
unfortunately, as part of a distortion,
uh, Christian scholars sometimes
contrast the phariseaic attitude of Hill
with the much more generous attitude of
Jesus. And they'll say, Jesus says,
"Love your neighbor as yourself." Love,
love, love. Hill just says don't hurt
people. So we clearly see the
superiority of Christian morality over
phariseaic morality because the
Pharisees just say don't hurt people.
Jesus says love. Now that's a patent
absurdity simply because yeah Jesus does
say love your neighbor as you love
yourself but Jesus is quoting a in
the says
it was not Yashka's invention.
So, so the question becomes, it's an
interesting question. Why does Hill use
the
negative? We normally assume that doing
good things for people, making them feel
good is a higher level than just not
hitting them. If the only thing I say
was, "Hey, I didn't slap you today." You
know, we wouldn't automatically consider
that to be such a supreme spiritual
level. So it is a good question. Why
does Hillel use the negative of not
harming people if the Tory itself
endorses the notion of positive
love? And I think there's a the Bali
Musher tell us there's a very profound
lesson in Hillel's teaching and that is
before you start helping
people do no harm. be sure you're not
hurting them when you're trying to help
them. And this is indeed something,
well, I'll give you a prosaic example.
You know, when people are sick, they're
under the weather. So, people have
different coping strategies. Some people
want to be left alone. They don't want
visitors. They don't want phone calls.
They don't want people to make chicken
soup for them. They want to be alone.
They want to sleep. Other people need
company. They need food, etc. So, let's
imagine you're a person who wants to be
alone. You want to sleep for 5 hours
without any
interruption. Your neighbor rings your
uh apartment 6:00 a.m. in the morning
with a huge pot of chicken soup and
says, "I was up all night making you
this
soup." Uh, and you say, "Well, thank
you, but I really want to sleep, but I
made you this soup." Well, the question
becomes this. The question becomes
what's the yeah you're doing a lovely
thing but you're not doing the way the
person
wants right so maybe you feel good about
the great thing that you did but you're
not really helping the other person now
hill is saying the following what is
hateful to you don't do to others you
wouldn't want people to ignore your
wishes you wouldn't want people to not
pay attention to what's important to you
so when you help other people don't
ignore what's important to them. So
that's an important lesson. Before you
become a dogooder to the
world, be sure you're not harming people
in the course of doing that. Right?
That's the that's the idea of why Hillow
uses the negative
because don't start doing positives
until you've ascertained with careful
reflection that you're not hurting
somebody in the course of of doing that
because a person's dignity is very
important. A person's self-respect and
the person's priorities have to be have
to be respected. They're not just an
object for your mitzvah. They're not
just oh I'm getting my own haba by
taking care of you. That's using a
person as an object and you don't use
people as objects. What they tell the
story? It's it's a bad joke but it's
it's it's kind of funny. Uh there was a
man who had learned in some muser that
if you marry a bitter bad wife, the
suffering is so great you're guaranteed
to get maban. So he was determined to
marry the worst woman he could possibly
find. Uh he was given good shid he
didn't want said I want. So he finally
marries a woman who's miserable and
bitter and complaining. Says,
"Barakashem, that's what I want." So he
marries a woman and the woman changes
overnight. She makes breakfast in bed
and she smiles and kind and makes five
course meals. Like everybody would just
be amazed how kind and compassionate and
giving she is. But he's not happy. So he
says to her, "Well, listen, I I I very
appreciate the nice things you're doing,
but that really wasn't the deal. That
wasn't my expectation." So she says to
him, "If you think you're going to go to
Haba because of me, you got another
thing you got another thing
going, right?" So So sometimes, you
know, people go through these things for
their own ego and not not because of and
that's why Hill emphasizes the
negatives. Okay. Um, but there's another
question. The guy, the non-Jew asked the
question, teach me the whole Torah on
one foot. Now, Hill didn't give him the
whole Torah. At Mo, right, the Torah
is between man and
God between man and man. At most, Hill
gave a principle that explains the
man-to-man interpersonal commandments.
Do not do things to people that you
wouldn't want them to do to you. Okay.
So, we could call that a
summary
of but it doesn't pick up. It doesn't
pick up shabas. It doesn't pick
up. So, how is he answering the
question? The guy said, "Teach me the
whole Torah on one foot." And just
because Hill says, "And the rest go and
learn." I mean, that's not an answer. I
mean, he wants to give you the whole
Torah. So, Rashi says a phenomenally
interesting point. Just Rashi. Rashi
says when Hillel says what is hurtful to
your to you do not do to your
friend. Who is your
friend? Your friend is not just another
human being. Your friend is the
Almighty. The Almighty
himself is your friend. And indeed um
Rashi quotes a puss in
Misha
alazov. Do not abandon your friend who
is the friend of your father as well.
And that's the almighty. That's
Hashem. Now that's fascinating. So just
as you wouldn't want your wishes to be
ignored, don't ignore the wishes of your
friend. So this is another yet another
aspect of our relationship to God. You
know, God is called Aenu, our father.
God is called Malcanu, our king. Uh God
is called uh a parent. God is called the
sibling. In Shirim, it's a brother
sister
relationship. Husband wife relationship
is very common. God is the husband,
we're the wife. But now we have a new
aspect in the relationship with
Akaleshu. God is your friend. When you
feel lonely, afraid,
isolated, you have a friend in the world
and that's a whole different aspect. And
therefore, when Hill says what is
hurtful to you, do not do to your
friend, it also encompasses not
only but it also
encompasses. Now, I just want to end
with the idea that I ended the Rebaka
story with Rebaka coming home with
24,000 students and the joyous
reunification with his beloved
Rael. But that's not unfortunately that
is not the end of the story. Uh that
part of the story is triumph, success.
But very shortly
thereafter those 24,000 students
died in a plague between Pesak
and that is the source of the
minhagim of mourning not getting married
etc during the
omare and just think about this 24 years
of work to bring 24,000 students
everything collapsed everything turned
to ashes
Everything's gone. Rael herself died
shortly thereafter. And again,
speculation one could surmise there that
heartbreak contributed to that as well.
How much could she take? Interestingly
enough, it mentions Rabi Akiva started
again. He got five
students. Was one of them. And he
started again. And all of the Torah that
we have came eventually through those
five students. That itself is a
remarkable lesson. You lose everything.
You lose
everything. And you start again even as
an older person who lost his beloved
wife as
well. That's the lesson of Ami Israel.
Not giving up. But khazal tell us that
there was a spiritual reason why the
24,000 students of rabbi
died because they did not show
proper respect and regard for each
other. Next week I'll talk about this
some more. We're at the end of this year
but I just want to point out that one of
the major themes of the omare is that
when we think about the deaths of rabbi
students we don't just mourn their
deaths. After all, if it would be, see,
if it would be just a question of
mourning deaths, we've had worse. I
mean, 24,000 is obviously a tragedy, but
we've had 6 million in the Holocaust. I
mean, more in the Crusades, we wouldn't
necessarily just focus on the number of
24,000 people dying. The significance of
focusing on this year after year after
year is not the mere fact of their death
but the reason that they died because
they did not show proper cavote for each
other and therefore it is it is our avod
during to try to rectify
that by showing cavote respect honor
love again connected to the para as
Um again I I say almost every week that
initially in the aftermath of OC of
October 7 there was a resurgence of a
ini that was very very positive albeit
from tragedy. Uh now people get used to
things and unfortunately uh bad habits
reemerge and we no longer necessarily
have that same sense. We have to try to
hold on to it. We have to try to hold on
to it. We have to try to build on it. We
have to try to create a world where Jews
love each other because after all uh not
too many other people love us that much
in the world that we're in. Uh we have
our relationship with Hashem. Uh and we
have our relationship with each with
each other. And that's about it. That's
all we have. That's all you need
actually. But that's all all we really
have. Um I don't want to get political.
I mean, even Donald Trump, you know, uh
I think we're, you know, we're happy
he's president, but you know, if it's
not in his interest in any given state
to support something that Israel needs
to do, uh he'll, you know, he'll go off
on his own path as well. So, uh so he's
not Mashia, right? We have to remember
that. Uh he is not he is not Mashiach.
Uh and ultimately, all we have is God.
And uh in order to bring Hashem into the
world, we need to have this aasel. And
this is why we think about the students
of Rabi. Thank you.
[Music]
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birthday is your