Rav Gav Friedman: Prayer - Why Doesn't It Seem to Work? - Project Inspire Convention

okay good morning everybody first and foremost again my name is Gabriel fredman AKA RAV gav let's get cracking so we're going to start off with uh hasem with Hashem we're going to start just very quickly if I can ask some questions and you can just rip them back they're not going to be difficult difficult questions here we go number one is we're going to talk about today's topic today's topic is well they they made it less enticing but uh what I used to call it is why prayer doesn't work and they say why prayer seems to not work or something along those because then what happens you go to if it ends up being that really doesn't say that so why prayer doesn't work and what exactly does that mean when we say such an idea of such a thing so let's start with number one what does the word teil mean translate prayer okay good I know there's other things right judgment and reflection and all that kind of stuff but okay we got prayer uh how do you say prayer in Hebrew F good we're catching on here now does anybody know does anyone know what when we talk in in terms of Jewish literature when we the word t it's referencing not just prayer but something quite specific within the prayer what is it say it again right the other as the 18 technically the 19 now that's what it means when we say the word again within within reference to Jewish literature Jewish law so when we talk about the word meaning that concept although that's not we're going to Branch out of that in just a moment but let's talk about this comes along the G in says the following thing the early righteous ones the early Pious ones what they used to do you know I feel too stuck over there is this a little better or no I feel better I feel better okay so uh so basically show the early right you know what I don't feel better the early righteous ones when they used to pray what they used to do what no no no you're fine still right the early righteous woman used to pray what they used to do is they would spend essentially the ends up saying nine hours a day praying why nine hours a day because it would take three hours for each why three hours for each says that we spent an hour before an hour during an hour after the hour before I get it makes sense to me you got to get high uh in reference TOA right you need to get you need to get high we're talking to hem we're going to get up to the almighty right these are things which are the r say the highest of the high unfortun going to come back to but the highest of the high it takes time to get to a level where you can be able to build yourself up so what are they doing some sort of meditation whether it's they were saying introductory Psalms during those ideas but it builds yourself up to get to that point then we have number three the third hour what what number two we'll get to that number three the third hour you got to come down from that high you can't go from being connected to the highest of the high and all of a sudden come on back down so let's go to work it doesn't work like that it takes time to come down from such a high that makes sense what about the hour during this is the question what about the hour during the hour during I I don't know everybody here and I don't know what you guys do and whatever but what I have noticed what I have seen in my experience and maybe I'm just ding in the wrong places is that generally it doesn't take an hour for somebody to say how long does it take this is sray maximum even those that push it s 8 10 11 12 and a half you know what I'm saying you get the teila award but what what is it that a person how long is a person nominating for what is an hour okay so they're concentrating kavana even like Ying is like okay you push it an hour you know an hour but during every day they're going D an hour what what are they saying and the we know I think I saw this in one of these I forget the little pamphlets and sure they have like praying with fire or let yourself on fire and and it says over there a beautiful concept it says that uh some of you might know this how many words are there in Shona s approximately the most recent answer I got was 770 okay that was the most recent yeah but I either get that or 6113 right or okay how many words come on Yell that what do you think come you get let me start over has anyone ever D in before and paid attention to how many words there are in SCH approximately how many [Music] what 500 100 750 that's yes oh 500 there are approximately 500 words in this one essay I thought you had it there yeah there you go I thought someone said it over here okay so approximately 500 Words you also read this praying with thing right 500 words in theay let's do a little math there's 500 words in SCH they're spending an hour saying how long are they spending in each word quick about 10 8 to 10 8 to 10 words for a minute how many 10 minutes how long are they spending on each word one second let's let's do the math here 500 seconds is how many minutes not that many right yeah 7 minutes if they're spending an hour on how long are they spending on each word approximately how long 8 minutes okay good right so then you have the idea whatever you're going to come up with that they say the word for 59 minutes and then the rest and one yeah okay that that could be I hear it could be okay the answer for that I haven't gotten if you said I'm sorry didn't hear it that would be approximately seven 7.2 seconds seconds right 7 Seconds now now that's a little bit it's a little bit strange if you think about it right we know the beginning of after what's the first the opening line right so what are they doing I me it's a little awkward right if you ask me some do that some do that I'm not whatever some do it and it's their own but what are they doing what's what's taking so long so the answer really is it's pretty pretty simple if you understand the basic definition of the word just essay they're action-packed loaded they're crack and lack and loaded every word in the is loaded and I find so many times that people have a hard time connecting to connect them to to to prayer and one of the biggest reasons I think it is is because how many of us actually understand the simplest definition of the words I'm not talking about the depth of the depth just the simple explanation of the words of the is there anyone in this room that feels comfortable we won't turn the camera on you but it feels comfortable in saying that they understand the simple explanation of the words of does anyone feel comfortable saying that I'm going to ask some questions everybody ready here we go yell it at if you know what ises the word that's pretty good okay well I missed it what okay um now here's another one okay I'm going to say a word I don't want you to translate it I just want you if you know the translation to raise your hand do not translate it if you know the translation raise your hand the word is Dee raise your hand if you know what the word means raise your hand if you know what the word means raise your hand if you know what the word means if you know what the word de means raise your hand I'm not doing too well here people if you know what the word to ver means can I hear one one going once going once okay don't say it what is the word now let's start with this some of you are like where where is that even what are you talking about right so anyone know where it is right right others know it from Kaneka right well say that's in right not right so that's that's what you say there yeah okay now you guys don't have that nigan right that's okay that's my okay so anyway uh we have it in R say now who knows what it means raise your hands come on raise it if you know it may I ask what does the word de mean lion say it again lion no no I don't think so could be in another I don't think so within the anyone else know what it means D yeah good good excellent it's a part of the B mdash and it's something particular what is it closer good Kash the word is referencing the Kash this is something we say three times a day simple explanation of the words please don't turn it on me because I don't know them either but my point is it's like I just don't connect it's feel it it's you know what I'm because we don't know what the words mean what do you want me to do I don't speak Hebrew get a translation right this is 50 years already of translations I'm probably more than that other you know companies right but the point is I'm just thinking art it's going 45 I know 40 any the point is you look at the other side so you have Hebrew and you have English but that's still difficult cuz it's so far right okay so we'll make it Interlinear you understand Hebrew English but it's so far so you make like inter you know it's going to be bless then it's going to be intering people just look just look look at the understanding of the words I just don't connect but if we understood what the words meant oh it would change everything so let's say for example word every day we say this now I know there's G to be some sticky people out there but let's try anyway what does mean yell it okay so the most that I've heard is what blessed are thou with King and that's good that's good and we know that excites everybody we get up in the morning saying I just cannot wait to say God is a the great the great the great supicious The Great and Wonderful right so we go over in these things what does this mean blessed are thou with King I want to give you another ination another understanding the word the word comes from what you are the source of thank you very much I appreciate that but AEM is really the one but I I understand it gets confusing right but we say means what the word comes from the word what is that mean modern Hebrew is a swimming pool or it's known as a spring a well spring so we say it means you God are you are bar you're the source of everything therefore can I get a what what and then we ask for things because we say that you're the source of everything now makes sense oh you're the one who's the source can I get health you're the one who Source can I get parosa you're the one who the source can I get etc etc etc not to be confused with Etc which is not a word okay so now that's one thing that's one understanding but if you take the letters again the main root words the shus of the word what does it spell out besides the word what's a a knee what do you do when you say the word in some parts of you bend at the knee isn't that interesting at the word where we Bend our knees is the same word as bar which means the knee what else if you take the word and you switch it around you have the word what's the the firstborn what does he get a double inheritance why because blessing comes in abundance take the idea of the words the letters b and you go ahead and you take the gatria what's Bas what's R what's 20 two 200 20 it's in doubles why in doubles it's blessing blessing comes in doubles you switch around again it spells the word re which means car it has no relationship to this class okay but the point of my friends what we're saying is to understand that every word is action-packed if we understood the meaning just a simple explanation without getting to the depth of dep this is why although a person is allowed to pray in any language they understand you understand English you could pray in English you understand Spanish you can do in Spanish you don't speak German don't D it in German but if you do then you can you're allowed to pray in any you understand it is ideal to pray in the originales the literal holy tongue right why is that because like we said a translation is a translation it's going to be going inad limiting it okay so that's idea what are they spending so much time we would spend a ton more time if we would understand what every word meant we'd spend tons of tons of time on every single word okay that's the beginning okay but what do we mean when we say prayer we don't just mean the idea of what do we mean we mean the whole K kabood right step back and we got the whole big idea of of moving up to the idea ofos I'm moving on to the idea of etc etc ETA but not only that it also doesn't just mean in a fixed book at certain times in a Shool in a besses with a what does prayer mean what does it mean essentially it means talking with Hashem that's all that it is I mean that's all that it is that's what it is it's talking with Hashem in which case Here Comes the question here comes the question why is it so neglected why do we neglect it so much why do we neglect Fila do it all the time we do it all the time rushing we don't feel it works we don't feel it works I'm sorry hear that listening what specific times specific times but even now you can do it all the time is this mine nice why don't feel that why is it so neglected now interesting interesting don't afterwards say I would have said this cuz you didn't say it yeah you're welcome to talk at any point in this class and say what you want yeah you don't get what you ask okay again why you got to be personal you don't generally don't always think one doesn't get with as what you don't it's not always thinking of God it's not on our mind okay it's not on one's mind now what yeah louder we don't connect feel connected what I was looking for someone to tell me is excuse me you don't even know me how dare you say that I neglect it but now that we see nobody said that and we're clear and we all neglect it let's go through the reasons now I didn't need you to tell me or not CU it's the gamar we mentioned it before these are the things that the highest of the high but people go ahead and we m in it is incredible unbelievable powerful could change worlds does change worlds and yet we go and we do it why we say it all the time other things but I think that the most accurate answer in my opinion and you're welcome to disagree you probably won't because it's the crowd thing and the selfesteem isue we another class but the idea is because it just doesn't work what is he talking about project Inspire it just doesn't work what do I mean that it doesn't what does that even mean well of course it of course it doesn't it work well let's think about that I live in the old that's not true I go to the Old City every day in usual I am not every day I go to a couple times I'm in The Old City sometimes I've been there once and in The Old City there's a street called kabad street kabad street number 34 kabad Street if anyone wants to go there there's a guy who lives there mosa Henderson does anyone know him okay so this guy you go to him anything you ask him for he gives you anything would anyone visit would anyone visit yeah you visit okay so you're a little skeptical you know what I'm saying yeah sure so you don't go but you see other people getting things whatever it may be rafu Yeshua cars whatever and you go to them and you're like yesu is the type of car and you're like you know you go and you say look let me check this thing out so you go and you say hi he goes hi how can I help you he say um you know I oh you like something well yeah okay sure what do you want a jet I want a jet you want a jet want a jet when tomorrow okay no problem you wake up the next day and you look out in your front yard and what do you see nothing but in your backyard there's a jet would you visit again maybe even twice maybe even three times a day perhaps morning afternoon and night you see when you would visit him would you go and you say to him can I get this can I get this or would you start with like you know I just want to I just want to tell you you're great G you're really great and can I get some what Ellen thank you so much you know what we call the PAT system praise ask thanks oh look at that my friends we would go every day we would be there all the time what is what are we doing we start up by saying God you're great we go get something this is what we're doing all the time you what why are we not because we're not getting we don't really think that it works I say we don't think it I'm not talking about those who don't think that I'm thinking that but those who are thinking that you get what I'm saying so what's happening over here I want to share with you over the next 2 hours an amazing idea obviously I'm kidding it's 2 and a half but I want to share I wish I had the time but I want to I just want to share with you an idea that okay kazara you know little Kazar never heard anyone except for heille when K repeatedly hit him but uh a little a little Kar here we go so so we're going to start off understanding that sometimes we pray we think we're not getting but really really we are getting you know we think we're not getting but really we are getting we'll start with the story which is an oldie but a goodie if you heard this one don't be that guy and the story is about a guy who goes to Manhattan he's driving to Manhattan Manhattan is a little bit of a difficult place to find parking unless you pay 40 bucks or something an hour it's a little bit hard to find and especially doesn't help the fact that we have everything is a oneway street in oneway Street in oneway Street in oneway street so some guy's got a business deal secular Jew makes his way down to Manhattan and he's looking you know he's got to get there it gets goes a half an hour early to make sure it gets parking everything's going to work out and he gets there and he's having a hard time you know first he sees after you know right away he sees the spot so he goes to pull in and what happens someone cuts him off and then they wave at each other with various fingers and then they and then he goes off okay so he goes around the block he goes around the BL goes around the block goes around the block then there's 20 minutes left and then there's 15 minutes left and he's like God and then there's 10 minutes left he's like God and then there's s minutes left he's like okay God okay I'll make you a deal don't be that guy I'll make you a deal you get me a parking spot I will be the best Jew ever I'll put on to fill in I'll get a rabbi this guy knows what he's talking about I'll go to church you just F okay a little confused but you give me I will I'm the best you ever what ends up happening ter he's not even done speaking he turns the corner and there's a spot right in front of the building there's a spot he pulls in there's money in the meter he's like yes he turns up the GU go God never mind I found one myself you know and what's so sad is it's not a joke don't even pretend to tell me none of you did that before we've all done this we all make deals with God and you just please you know what I'm saying I'll be so good you know I'll with extra I'll understand the word de pleas and then when it comes true I mean how many of us see say come on you can't build a case of a parking spot come on it's so either CU it's so insignificant or one of my favorites it's just a coincidence I have to num for it and I got it yeah you happen to not find one you do them for it and Bam you get it wow what a coincidence I want to share with you a story about coincidence the following story happened in 1967 this story I heard this story 11 years ago in pisgat Zev on number 42 Alo meridor by Arab shimoni that's where I heard the story about two months ago I was in the supermarket and I saw him again and I went over to him and I wasn't really so affiliated with him I just happened to have met him and I went again and I told him you know I'm like is that story really true and I asked him you know thing I you remember you told a story 15 whatever 10 11 years ago and he says yeah yeah and he told me where to find it in a certain book and I want to share you the following story the story happened in 1967 Six Day War there a bunch of how do you say that paratroopers that were jumping over the Jordanian border and as they're jumping over the Jordanian border 10 Israeli Jews secular soldiers they jump out afterwards they testify they saw these three white things right nobody knew what it was but they saw these 10 these 10 these 10 jumped out when they landed for those who didn't do too well with our math before about the 500 into one hour let's see if you can do a little better now they landed and they were greeted with 1,000 Jordanian soldiers what's the ratio 100 to one okay good they're greeted by 1,000 Jordanian soldiers so they hit the thing they look around they're like uhoh they're about to give up and before they surrender all of a sudden 1,000 Jordanian soldiers put their guns down raise their hands up and say okay we give it so what did the Israelis do that's right IDF you heard of us and and G okay now you got to be careful that okay anyway the point is and then go ahead and what happened to these people many of them became observant Jews became what's known as balich Chua right they became they saw an open Miracle their life was gone and they saw these three white things they couldn't explain it they get there they land a thousand they go and they give up they're like this is the hand of God and they became religious one became observant at least one of them and they were being interviewed by a reporter and a reporter came to the house and S me come on come on maybe it was just a coincidence maybe it's just a coincidence so this guy says to the reporter I want to tell you a story story in a story number one he says once upon a time there were these two people they saw in the distance that there was an animal and one of them says wow what a beautiful cat guy goes cat what are you talking about it's a bird it's like bird cat bird cat bird cat bird he goes you know why are we fighting let's throw something at it we'll see what happens so they throw something at it and sure enough the bird flies away see I told you it's a bird and the guy doesn't even look at him he's staring into space he says I wouldn't believe it if I didn't see it myself a flying cat how many of us are like this friends if you do not want to see something no matter what evidence no matter what proof no matter what ideas are shown you're not going to see it simple as that if you want to see something yeah you'll also be able to see certain things let's try to keep it open mind to understand what happens a person got that parking spot some called coincidence I have to call but I get the idea I call prayer I understand the concept is that sometimes a person would think you know come on you going build a case off your your parking lot story it's got to be a little more intense to that I'll tell you I'll tell you I want to apologize in advance if this in any way shap perform touches someone's heart in a way which they get a little bit too emotional this is an example which I always give let's say a person has a friend a relative an acquaintance someone that's in the hospital they're sick and they're dying has anyone ever had someone like that and you prayed for them and they died has that happened yes how do you feel exhilarated just want to do that again pray for the next person I'll tell you something it's a little bit challenging at least for me we don't have time to go through all of them but just at least one I want to share it's hard for me I have a friend who unfortunately his mother got ill and she ended up passing away from this illness but when she got ill and people were praying for her I went to one of my rabbits I said listen I'm having very hard time maybe I should stop praying because it seems to be my track record isn't that good and every time I pray somebody dies maybe if I don't pray they'll live yeah and he goes oh you a Cofer said why he said of course feel of course we dve him but it's hard let's be real it's hard if we don't see the results that we're looking for it seems a little bit difficult a little bit hard so what's going on over there so I want to share with you another one of the line from these beautiful little pamphlets my brother disagrees my brother says all but I'm going to start with the line that I saw most of life's disappointments are based of either false preconceived notions or misunderstandings most of life's disappointments are based of either false preconceived notions or misunderstandings my brother wants to suggest all okay but I'm going to stick with most most of life's disappointments you get disappointed why it's based of either false preconceived notions you thought something was supposed to be a certain way it turned out to be that it's really not that way and then you get all upset but you were maybe wrong with what you had assumed or misunderstandings you're right you're just not seeing it properly okay so then what's prayer what's prayer what does it mean prayer what does it mean what does it mean when we talk about the concept that a person Davin what is that idea what I think it's a big misunderstanding so let's start with this why do we dve in the first place why do we dve give me some answers go connection connect ourem come on what else it's czy one things one things okay now because it's going to take too long to get things out of you people I'm going to have to what pancakes thank you thank you you're welcome so now oh thanking Hashem right thanking him right this is getting confusing some i'mm I one saying thank you right anyway so we want to thank him we want to was a connect with him I mean pardon me I'm so sorry again for being so mundane here I'm going to talk about me and maybe you can connect to me I rarely wake up in the morning and say the following I cannot just I can't wait to connect and just think I want to testify you know that there's one God I just can't what to come on why do we usually pray we need something we want something but it's also Connection in things and that stuff I'm not putting it aside but we got kind of two distinct categories you connect and we also have because we want things so let's play this out my friends for those who said connection and thanks if it was really true that you felt that way then what would be if you prayed for something or everything and you never got what you prayed for what would that say about prayer let's try again if the purpose of prayer is connection and thinking just the act of praying itself is a connecting force and a thanks so you've already accomplished what you're trying to do and it has no connection regardless of what you get or irregardless which is a word although the dictionary says not to use it but what you get is what God wants you to have that's very special you can't always get what you want that's right and what he gives you find someone you get what you need right that's true right that that could be but at the same time you do know you can get something even if it's not good for you and you cannot get something even if it's good for you yeah but if it's you think it's not good for you but God knows it's good for you and there are times when you'll get it and God will also know it's not good for you that's how powerful prayer is right we're going to talk about in a moment you know that from mosu right at least from so understand my friends we got two things if it's for connection and relationship that kind of stuff then when you pray for things you don't get it okay so I didn't get it who cares it's not it would be a nice plus but it doesn't change anything what if the reason for prayer was to get stuff and then you didn't get it then what would you say it doesn't work but we know it's really both it's a mixture of both we praise we ask we thank we testify and also we want things we need things whatever it may be yeah because wants you good another answer and a correct one but don't negate the others they're all correct we have a correct but besides that ideas also we understand the concept is in order to get you comes and tells us in the beginning of rinkus brings down the famous idea rash the of that that that hm wants to give us Stu but he doesn't give it do until we ask for it till we ask for it no there times that it's also to get things so what's going on so let's let's try to build up I want to suggest and this is going to be a little kutah I apologize it's going to be what I don't really apologize it's a formality perhaps we've never really prayed in the first place how dare you perhaps we never prayed in the how it's perhaps what let me explain going to break down into three different categories of what does it mean when a person goes and we pray there are three different ideas which I think are fundamental and necessary for a person to be able to be involved with the idea of to feel in prayer number one number one number one number one is the following let's go with the story line which is you brought up and that's the concept of mosha Abu we know that mosu got punished for whatever reason but got punished and his punishment was that he wasn't allowed to go into AR so what was his response he do good then what and then what happened oh he D once and then stop oh so he D then what happened and then he D then D and then he D and then he D and then he and then he and then he which we know was how many times 5 515 times which happens to be the gatri of the word te which happens to be the of the word and he downed 515 times and God says Moshe you better stop right now because if you pray one more time I'm going to give it to you M's like oh my gosh I'm so sorry I'll stop oh my goodness what am I thinking oh my goodness this reminds me like my son he's eating brownie number 12 he says I want another one I say no he says yes I say no yes no yes no yes no I say son if you ask one more time I'm going to give it to you I think my six-year-old's going to be like brownie that's it here think about that what does that even mean okay it's all discussion of itself says goes in going to be going go Jewish people what they're supposed to be doing it's going to be lild make this B is going to be never destroy because the fact that buil get angry the people's going to destroy the people another the place so that's why he doesn't do it that's but I that's not the point right now to get into the the point that I want to share with you is when we go and we pray for things how many times do we pray let's go to our case at the hospital a person goes to pray for somebody and then they die how do they feel well how many times did you pray if it's real if our understanding is a relationship and a connection and real this is one The Source bar of everything that how many times do we do it one time well did it over and over and over again okay fine I hear you I hear you fine number one 515 times so let's go to the hospital and we pray for this person and we pray and we pray and we pray and we pray oh my gosh we pray and what happens they still die what's going on number two number one it's not once it's a relationship we're speaking we're going for it number two so number two are there any doctors in the room by any chance any doctors none wow lawyers oh doctor well you're embarrassed don't be embarrassed that's okay what kind of doctor okay so I want to share with you an idea which I think you know right it's it's it's a beautiful thing which people sometimes will buy from people when they when they finish medical school and they put it like on the wall say to sh from right that essentially means that the best of doctors go to hell right it's it's a wonderful wonderful idea and uh says he's not a good doctor oh he's not a good exactly so either don't be good right you gotta love that so everyone just be clear pediatrician okay all right so now got to zoom in on that no I'm kidding okay so so full name sir Okay so to Sham the best of doctors go to gam now what what does that mean exactly okay there could be a lot of understandings I just want to share with you at least one concept there's a story which I don't know where I saw this I think I saw in like chicken soup for your cousin mother's Soul it's out of print but you know I have anyway so so the story is about a woman who had a child who unfortunately got a little bit ill and when the child got a little bit ill the this woman had to bring her child to to a specialist and she was really dreading doing it not because didn't want to help her son but her experiences of being with like professionals and like experts was that they're a little bit arrogant a little bit full of their abilities and whatever so she was a little okay but you have to do it she came along she met with this doctor when she met with this doctor she was so taken AB back by his bedside manner so kind so sweet so gentle so not arrogant that she couldn't believe like this is amazing and she but she noticed something very interesting that every time someone came in the room to ask him a question which seemed to be important he would he would immediately like put his hand in his pocket so she decides to call him out one time and say what's that thing you do you know where you go where you go like that he's like I don't know what you're talking about he's like I'm telling you every time you go ahead and you do that thing where you go and you just like you do that I don't know what you're talking about a nurse walks in goes doctor he goes yes he goes that what was that he goes fine I'll tell you I've been a doctor for 25 years let's go back to medical school let's go back 30 years ago I'm going to medical school and I'm rocking that thing I'm rocking it top of of my class I graduate I'm the top of the class residency top resident we finished they open a brand new hospital I'm the top doctor in this new hospital cuz I was just so good I was so good and then what happened one day one of the first weeks they Rush a baby into the emergency room terrible wheezing sound coming from his throat and I quickly said say quick tracheotomy get me 20 milligrams to Saskatchewan get me some Gatorade let's get started I'm not a doctor would that be accurate for pediatricians I guess good doctor okay yeah so what happens is quickly and then a nurse comes over and goes doctor one second and the doctor goes excuse me I'm the doctor you're the nurse how doctor one second she walks over to the baby looks inside puts her finger into the baby's throat pulls out a little toy whistle baby starts breathing completely normally he said at that moment my ego went from here all the way down and I've kept that whistle in my pocket I've washed it since and every time I feel my ego going up I touch it to remind myself what's going on my friends there are certain times when a person starts to feel the fact that they're in control but it's not only them I'm going to shift to now us and this is number two when we go we do in for people and we're praying for people who are we praying to are we praying to Hashem or are we praying to the doctors I know you're we're praying to Hashem that the doctor should be I got it I got it but are we praying to we praying to the doctors what am I talking about so I want to tell you something I volunteer in Israel much less now but from a I've been in hospitals many times and I see this a lot of times especially in Israel for the medical as a medical organization in in Israel I've ambulances and hospitals and you see a lot of times people and it's amazing to see from the most religious to the most secular it doesn't matter people pray you sit down there pray but this is one thing which I found so many times a person sitting there and they're praying they're praying they're praying they're saying to H Psalms if you don't know how to read and Psalms if you do and they're praying and then they're in the middle praying and as they're praying the doctor walks out and they do this doctor just it's Doctor Who are you just talking to who are you talking to when you're praying you're in the middle of talking to you're allow to go to doctors of course my clock is back okay let's go with do say yeah I pull you P you're allowed to go to doctors and you should okay depending another she how however understand the idea when it goes and says when we're ding if we're ding to to the the top doctor and then you stop to go speak to this doctor okay hold on I'm not saying you could but maybe you can never see this doctor again no you can see them in 10 minutes maybe finish the capital and then go who we who we putting our everything into are we ding to hasm are we ding to the the doctors and I'll tell you something I have a neighbor who lives across the street from me their name is their name is Elbas a couple of years ago I think it was I it was three or four years ago my neighbor that one of their daughters ad basana and she's still ding Adina basana was was walking to school and she got hit by a tender tender is like a mini bus was very very bad she was hit and uh her brother little brother shimmy watched the whole thing saw the whole thing occur knocked down to the floor inter internal bleeding coma it was it was very very very bad now n Miracles Miracles Miracles Hashem she's doing unbeliev you if you don't know her you wouldn't know you wouldn't even know anything happened if you know her then you'll know maybe her voice is a little quiet or whatever but she's unbelievable and she was at the time that this happened so you get to see the Israeli kids at the time this happened she gets knocked down and her little brother Shimon sees her and goes oh my God Adena she's lying face down Adena Adena wake up get up get up she's lying there not moving Adena get up get up nothing ambulance comes they take her to put in the ambulance and he goes in the ambulance and they go no kid you know get out you know whatever he goes I'm coming and sits down he's 12 years old understand I'm coming and he sits in the aul like all right he's coming you know comes in sits down when he sits down there he is and and they start working on her and then they start asking him questions just medical questions background but they weren't integral questions that were necessary for that moment they were just basic background type of ideas the kid staying to Hill him and the doctor goes okay kid what's your address he's in the middle of the capital so what does he do who knows what Israelis do he goes the Israeli way of back off yeah in other words one minute he finishes to Hill him and then he answers the question who are we talking to who are we ding to who are we putting our trust in the doctor and if that doesn't work I know another specialist I'm not saying nothing don't misunderstand go to doctors go to Specialists but I'm just saying who are we putting our complete trust and then this should be really just a shal I'll tell you a story goes back to June 24th 2000 no June 25th 2009 yes I know what you're thinking it was the day that Michael Jackson died M Yak it's also the day it's also the day that my son was born they say one sun sets and another he came out you know he was like anyway so so it happens is that uh I know you know episa you don't I'm talking about the pish no bread but basically what happens is that on June 25th 2009 my son was born one my oldest son now makes him six and six and a half so and almost seven six I don't know he's some he's he's like in he's he's in the young he's in the single digits and and uh and okay I want to tell you the the continuation of the story you know that's where we are today beautiful amazing incredible unbelievable healthy wonderful let's back up June 4th 2009 the day before my son's boring what happens my wife is expecting a boy I never told anyone what we're having my son's expecting a boy June 24th 2009 so what happens whereas she felt the whole pregnancy movement she didn't feel movement she stopped feeling movement she gets nervous lies down on the left side in fear of inic has some sugar starts to move jump up now nothing so we go to the hospital hadim we live in inim area Mount scopus hospital we go there we get there they hook up to the monitor the whole thing and then you hear it that would be awesome if that was it sound but you know like right you're the heartbeat you see it it's that like whatever you're like it was amazing anyway so we goes that and we see I was like so we go ahead and we see he's a and and what happens he see in the heart rate the monitor is about 120 130 right that would be normal for you know a child of that age in utero about 125 130 and okay good and I'm like all right we'll go home like uhuh you ain't going nowhere right this is it do this is it so like all right okay cool we actually tried escaping but whatever we go ahead a couple times and we're sitting there and then okay heartbeats doing his thing I'm I play guitar my son plays the heartbeat and we're doing this thing we're jamming and then all all of a sudden you hear the following all of a sudden I don't want to ruin this recording over here all of a sudden what you do is you hear like this you hear you know now my first hint that there was something wrong was the fact that you heard something was wrong the second is I looked at the Monitor and you saw it went from like 1:30 to about 25 the third is when the nurse goes I'm pardon me one second doctor goes like running out of the room and when they go running out of the room I was like I think honey I think something's wrong you know and they came along and they came in they start flipping and flopping and Su and this that and oxygen and doing things I'm like I don't know what's going on let me tell you something like I mentioned I volunteered for maada we learned we trained we trained for child birth we learned 10 hours of catch that's essentially what we learned I am I know what okay I know how to catch all right suction like you know B I know what I'm doing all right I'm like but I had no idea what was going on in that room and then after about a minute comes back then a couple minutes later it happens again then back then again then back and this is very scary but everything was stabilized at one point then then it came to the point where it was active this is it the baby's coming out and when the baby's coming out what happens I go and I start saying to I start saying it over as a custom some say it one time some say it 12 times some say it 100 some say it a million right okay I'm a calist so I can't tell you how many times I say it but I say about 12 times right 12 times I'm saying I'm doing thing and as I'm doing after about five times it happens again the har drops when the har drops I'm like okay that's it I'm going to do something give me gloves I'm ready for positioning let's go I'm ready and as I'm thinking this I realized to myself and only because I give this sheer what am I doing there are two competent doctors that are dealing with this of 20 years experience first of all what am I even going to do second of all I'm talking to Hashem isn't this the time to focus and talk to Hashem so I kept going six times and seven times and eight times and N9 and 10 and 11 and 12 and 13 and 14 no and at 12 baby comes out baby comes out and I was like oh what do you hear baby comes out who said nothing that was horrible you heard nothing silence if you guys know the I told you the end of the story already right so the end of the story is everything's fine but at the time there's nothing baby quiet and my heart dropped for 5 seconds there was complete silence which felt to me like 5 seconds and then after 5 seconds I heard probably the most beautiful sound that I've ever heard there was someone playing violin in the hallway then the baby starts crying it was such a it was amazing but it brought me to the point number one how many times are we doing 515 times 500 million times number two God you're the one I'm praying to I'm a I need you I need you and only you you're the only one that can do anything and sometimes we find in our life that it takes us time to have to go through every Avenue to come to the understanding the only Avenue is Hashem and we have to do our stus we put our effort in but the end it's only Hashem good let's go to the hospital our case of person's dying we go we pray 500 million times we go God you're the one and then the person still dies what's going on number three from the time the was destroyed when the temple was destroyed all the gates of prayers were closed except for a Gates of Tears sh deos if a person cries and a person Domin and they're sincere and they're real about it then what happens there's no question the TOs go through truth is a little bit scary I was speaking with kki this morning about this and it's not so clear about that that would depend onara that's very scary H lashara teach on page yud B if you want to check out in the small version a person who speaks Lara it's not that your feels aren't answered is that your feels never went to shamaya they just stay here tah never goes up in the first place explained that to me is that you need to be able to bring this stuff up and when a person speaks you cut off that connection and therefore it just stays here okay but assuming no one does speak Lara of course doesn't then what happens we go ahead and we have to recognize number three are we sincere are we real are we real do we really believe this is it real to us are we in sh de so we crying okay so we got three number one 515 times number two God you're the one number three sincerity it's all real so we go back to the hospital we dve and the person still dies what's going on so what I want to do just to give you an idea what's going on because I'm totally over and I have well next class is in here so you can just stay it's all right well for me at least so it goes like this very very unbelievable idea goes like this the story goes back to October 14th 1994 many of you will be familiar with the story it's a very idea the only thing I could add to it is you'll see in a moment what happened October 14th 1994 does that sound familiar to anybody who said it how did you know I remember I remember 199 very that's right nakon Waxman there was a soldier by the name of nakon Waxman does anybody know that name does anyone know that name for those who are familiar and those who aren't familiar naan Waxman was a soldier who ended up getting kidnapped unfortunately I believe was October 9th if I'm not mistaken and end up getting killed on October 14th to make the story a little closer to home this was my my mother's first cousin Nan wax's mother is Esther Esther and UDA these are my great aunt and uncle my grandmother's sister and brother-in-law Uncle Yuda Aunt Esther and I remember the day that it happened it was a of chabas it was a of shabis in New York time it was 4:30 in the afternoon in there to was about 11:30 at night 4:30 11:30 I remember my mother my mother this is so unbelievable so so so terrible the whole world was happening everybody was involved everyone knows about it he was an American citizen so Bill Clinton was very intimately involved in trying negotiations they found out where he was and my mother called up a friend of hers aab shabas saying don't forget to light a candle don't forget to light a candle cuz people were lighting candles a of shabas and the said he should be saved and the mer should be saved and I didn't hear the other side of the conversation but I can imagine how it went cuz my mother said like this don't forget to light a candle and the person must have said oh you didn't hear and then my mother said here what and then the next thing I saw was my mother fall to the floor so vivid it was AR shabis my other side of the family's cousin's Bar Mitzvah and it was so shocking but the craziest part of the story and something you've heard before but what happened that Uncle Yuda Uncle Yuda went to ravalon ravalon was the r ravalon is a Cohen he's not allowed to go into the cemetery but he goes and he spoke at the funeral and he said I need you to tell the people the following message I need you to tell the people the following message when I was young I was diagnosed with a with a certain disease pardon me I for cave what's a cave in English a liver a liver disease now I think it it could have been kidney I believe it's a liver disease that the doctor said I'm not going to live to the age of 20 says Uncle UDA Na's father my great uncle not going to live to the age of 20 so what can I do so I pray what else am I going to do when I hit 20 I started dating and I met I met you know Esther and I told her I said listen you should just know I want you to know I verified the story recently I spoke with him and he said absolutely he told me the whole story again and he said and I spoke to him Esther and I said you should just know I shouldn't be here today I don't you want to marry me you're taking your chances so she goes listen most wives want to kill their husbands anyway ad lip in any event she goes and said let's go to the doctor they go to the doctor the doctor say listen I don't know how he's still alive I don't know but what I could tell you is he's never going to have kids so what can I do so I D it they had seven boys not right away I it was like to you never know now seven boys okay and he's sick at the time back in the day now it's a little crazy as well but back in the time if if you didn't go to the Army you can't get a job I couldn't go to the Army because I was sick so I had to get a job so what happens I go and what are I going to do so I prayed I said God give me you knowa so let's see what happened I said God make me get better let me live till 20 let me get married let me have children let me let me have a business let me have a house let me have money let me have take care of me you know what hasem said he said okay yes yes yes yes yes yes and then I said Hashem give me back my son and he said no so many times we do for things and we think oh you see we didn't pray pray we didn't get it must be there's no God I know we say this we go to our parents can I get the car no you don't exist we might say that but they still exist there they are just cuz we're not getting something doesn't mean that there's no God sometimes the answer is no but why do bad things happen to good people come back next year but I understand it's a different category my friends we got ourselves the following idea three ideas number one the one in which you pray you got to understand 515 times number two you're the one that I'm praying to number three sincerity and sometimes the answer is no okay what I want to do right now is a quick recap everything we did cuz I'm pretty much over quick recap end off with one story point then we're done here we go so we PR little understand all unbelievable the concept amazing pray you're the one I'm praying to and we get a little further me for something why I getting on in the first place why we D because well parking spot never mind God I got myself no realiz look a flying cat understand when a person comes to realize the idea if you don't want to see you ain't going to see if you want to see it you're going to start to see there's a many things going in this world then a little bit further and go okay what do we mean the one person getting answered answer three ideas three steps the person why we do because we need something we want something because we want to connect we want thing really it's a mixture of all the things why we not getting un S three things number one 515 s we got to put ourselves into the C where we're can't by 34 Street number two God you're the one that I'm praying to number three is the idea of what destroyed sincerity it's got to be real it's got to be the person's got be feeling it and number four sometimes the answer is no difficult hard challenging but that doesn't mean there is no God I want to end up with this one last story The Story Goes that there was a boy who grew up completely secular and he went to his father one day he says Dad I want a bar mitzvah he says leave me alone he's like Dad come on he's like I'll buy you a car he's like all right next day Dad I want a bar mitzvah smart kid so he goes he's like all right fine I'll get you bar mitzah those uninitiated what do you need to get Bar Mitzvah there's a couple of criteria you need be 13 Jewish male and Alive you are now Bar Mitzvah but he meant he wanted to party he wanted to read from the Torah he wanted to say okay fine he gets him an orthodox rabbit to study with and they're learning they're studying together and one day the Orthodox rabbit says to him I like I don't get it you're completely secular why would you want a bar mitzvah he says let me tell you a story story and a story number two he says you know I have a sister and like all good siblings I hate her I said you know what God I'll make you a deal you give me a brother and I will be the best Jew ever but how do I know that the boy's going to come from you maybe my mother's just going to have a baby the baby has to be born on my birthday baby's born on my birthday we're good to go she goes okay so the rabbi sitting in the edge of his chair he falls off he gets back he goes what happened next he goes one year later my mother gave birth to a bouncing baby boy 5 days before my birthday I said you know what God that's close enough I'm in this RAB is like astounded at 11-year-old kid making deals with God it doesn't come true and he still goes with this it's like it's unbelievable and he goes wow he goes home the next day he comes back and he says hey little boy I checked the calendar and your brother was born on your Hebrew birthday those unfamiliar we have a Gregorian calendar and the lunar calendar Gregorian calendar goes a 365 days versus 354 days 11 days difference we got the courted as well they correspond once for 19 years of swiming boing night here my friends you understand what that means sometimes we dive in we think we're not getting answered but maybe you're looking at the wrong calendar any questions comments stories look your taxs please them afterwards till next time it's been a pleasure I'll see you when you take care have a good day bye bye