Rebbe's Hagada #4 - Education for girls is antidote to secularism, 11 Nissan - RC Dalfin

So we're learning we're in the middle of the actual telling of the story that the father or the leader of the seder sh tells answers the questions the four questions in order to answer questions you need to have a background. So we get the background to Moshe. You get the background here that we were slaves in Egypt. But even before we were slaves, you know, it started with Jacob, Yakov, and Laben. And we go through the whole history when it comes to the idea of the slaves in Egypt. It says that Pharaoh, he he decreed that all males that were born, Jewish males should be thrown into the river. and the girls. The decree wasn't on girls, but yet we find the language in the Torah implies that he he you know he did want to hurt the females as well. So the language is such that he did it through teaching them Egyptian culture. And this is the lesson. The Reb speaks about this in his talks. The lesson that in a way the drowning of the mind to become Egyptianized is worse than the drowning of the body because you die, you die. Finish. Okay. But when you educate someone in a in not just a secular way but in a an Egyptian way i.e. to worship the Nile River to worship idols in our world it would mean it would be to worship dollar bill. you're you're not only killing that individual who you educate that way, but their offsprings as well. Whereas when you drown someone, Pharaoh wanted the male to be drowned, there's no offsprings. It's only that individual. So, it stops there. But when you educate a a girl in in the Egyptian culture, in the Egyptian way, she's going to educate her child and and and and her daughter or son will educate their children. There'll be a perpetual disgrace of God's name of godliness of Torah. So this is even a worse decree that Pharaoh in his devious way planned. And I think it's important thing to talk about Mark that more than you know with the Holocaust no one has an answer to go why God allow made the Holocaust. However, when people wrote to the Rebi about this, asking the Rebi, "Do you have an explanation?" The Rebi says, "I don't have an explanation." But what I could say is that if the solution is to drop your Judaism, as many did unfortunately, because they said if God can make this happen or allow it to happen, etc., there's no God, God forbid. What's the result? The result is that you you drop out of Judaism and your family becomes secular and it becomes Egyptian-like and then and non-Jews come into the family and it can lead to idolatry and all kinds of antithetical issues to God. Is that the solution? The Rebi asked, is that the solution? That's that's not a solution. THAT'S MAKING IT EVEN WORSE. So by you dropping out, by a person dropping out when something happens, October 7th or just someone becoming ill that doesn't make any sense, a child, whatever the case, and the and and and the person resolves, if that's the case, there is no God. I can do whatever I want. It's all baloney, blah blah blah. No. So what happens? Not only are you killing the person one time, God took away this person. So God killed in your view, God killed the person one time. BUT YOU'RE KILLING THE PERSON FROM MANY generations because by taking away the Jewish religion, you're removing that from all your future generations. That was the Reb's one of his arguments to those that asked him about the Holocaust. And the same as over here as we sit the night of Pesak. In your case, Moshe, you have two daughters who are Jewish. So, their offspring will be Jewish. But it's much more than just that they'll be Jewish. Okay. Their mother is Jewish. They're Jewish. They have a proper conversion. They're Jewish. It's the education. How do you educate the child, the children, the future, you know, that that that that Judaism is important, that Torah is important, even if I don't do everything and who does everything? But I know this is the ultimate, this is the truth. You know, there are people, I'm sure, you know, from where you come from, Newark and Maplewood and that whole area, you know, there were people who weren't orthodox, but they they identified with an orthodox sho. Why? Even though there was reformer and conservative. Why? Because they knew this is the real McCoy. Whether I personally am there or not, that's another discussion. But you know and and it that it's important to keep up this truism and and that by the way was one of the arguments that you know orthodoxy had to conservatism and reform was no one does everything but why do you have to cut out and cut away from the tradition you know by by by creating a new form of of religion of of of tradition of of Judaism, you could like it was years ago. You belong if you if you want to join a a shul, you belong to an Orthodox shoo and you come in, you do more or less. You know when people hear I heard from people here in Brooklyn the president would come in and you can hear his keys shaking in his pocket cuz he just parked his car and he comes in a chabas to an orthodox shoe like and he's the president of the shoe. That was the situation in 1920s and 30s in America. But they belong to an Orthodox shoe. In other words, they knew that this is my father and my grandfather. You know that's the MS. That's the truth. I'm not there. Okay, I I gotta get there. Tell a story with the Reba. There was someone I think he actually lived maybe around here in Burough Park where I live around this neighborhood I think anyway or elsewhere maybe New Jersey. and he would come to the fabbrangers of the Reb on Shabas on on Yam and and he would stand and listen and the Reb showed him a lot of closeness and affection. And one time the Reb said to him, I think it was at Kash where the Reb would give a little wine by Havdala after Shabas after Yam um after the holiday and the Reb said, "Put your keys down on the table." And after he was already so close to the Reb, he felt close, he gave the Reb the keys. The Reb didn't tell him to put the keys down when he met him or even after a year. It you know it was after a while that he's he was coming and he was not he was driving to sh okay he wasn't keeping Shabas to the letter of the law and the Reb knew about it. He didn't say anything and several years later when you know when the Reb I guess felt it was the right time and again he didn't force him. He just like said that it's about time you put your keys down on the table. So it's all about the relationship, you know, and he listened again. Did it become a showabas? I don't know. But that idea. So we're talking here about the part of the agod that talks about the parro's decree on the males to throw them right into the water and the females not to but to educate them in the Egyptian way. And that's worse cuz that you kill not just the person and that's it but the future generations. So the deviousness of the plot that Pharaoh had for the girls was even worse. It's a very important point to point out. You know, people think that it's easier to kind of, you know, maybe raise girls than boys. You know, I had have thank God six girls and one boy. You know, in a way it's harder because the the the the girls are the future. It it it it carries habias the primary mainstay of the home and they're going to set the home later in life. So what a mother and a father have to give girls is in a way much more than giving boys because boys go to yeshiva girls go to a school too but it's not the same you know bakarim boys students in yeshiva it's a whole culture girls in a sense you know it's really through the home so it's and and I've seen it I could I could talk because I had my six girls and we went through this and what you get in the house from the parents is is more important and greater with girls than boys. So it's it's something to talk about at a seder you know the importance of forming and and and the ideas in in in in the girls I mean discussions at the Shabas table with your girls is very very important and to allow them to voice their opinion and to dialogue and not to shut them down and to explain and to arouse. It's a very very important thing because these future girls will set the tone in the house and you you probably are aware of as parents and grandparents that that the the the if the woman is strong the husband will go along. There's always an exception, but by and large it is the woman who sets the tone in that house. The level of hiddite and kite and from kite and kite and everything really you know so far wanted to uproot that. He understood that FARRA WASN'T A TIPISH. Pari was a very shrewd operator and he understood IF I IF I GET RID OF THE you know if I kill the girls like I KILL THE BOYS DROWN THEM. OKAY, I KILLED THEM ONE TIME BUT I WON'T I won't I won't kill Judaism. I won't kill because they'll rebuild in a way. I'm just thinking about it how all this fighting and and this killing which is no there's no way around it right cuz they they they seek to kill us but if if it wasn't this way you got to change the you got to change the way you think about you the way they think about ye in order to to get that you have to ch change the THE WAY THEY EDUCATE their their youth And as long as that's not done, and unfortunately it's it's very hard to accomplish because of the system that they have. There's always going to be this fighting till Mashiach comes. They're being educated from babies. P we've seen pictures with them holding gun. You know that the whole culture in their schools. So this is a very important point the night of sedar sed to discuss. Now there's a paragraph here. It's on page 20 over here. It's before we lift the cup for blessed is Hashem who who thought about the end of days. The previous has a beautiful interpretation. He says like this that the the the is telling us like this that if not for the desire to have the kates the gula the redemption mashiach golos would continue and WOULD ALSO HAVE A BENEFIT. YOU KNOW WHAT THE BENEFIT IS? the desire, the yearning. You know, WHEN YOU HAVE SOMETHING RIGHT IN FRONT OF YOU, you take it for granted. SO DURING THE TIME of Messiah, as great as the revelation of Mashiach will be, but it'll be here. It says everything will be rosy and dandy and good, right? So we get used to it. when you get used to it. So there's no desire anticipation when you're missing something which is this the time of golos exile when we don't have redemption we have fighting and killing and problems and sorrows we yearn how long will this be WE WANT MSIACH you know I I want things to be better I want my you know family to be healthy and secure there is that constant reaching out to God Almighty. So the the the the is saying that although that although there is that virtue to go which is the longing and the yearning for Moshiach and God nevertheless Hashem said my dear Jews my dear people there is a case I HAVE PUT INTO THE equation a time when this exile will seize will finish and the Msiah will come. That's why we say who blessed is are you God that didn't say you know I'm not going to I'm not going to have a desk a certain day for Messiah a certain year and on and on but I LIKE YOUR YEARNING CALL TO ME YOU KNOW YOU READ THE ha you read the sections of the ha just this shabas hashem is constantly telling the prophets to tell the JEWS WHY AREN'T YOU CALLING OUT to me? This speaks of Torah. He says that your calling to me is better THAN YOUR SACRIFICES. I DON'T NEED YOUR SACRIFICES. What do I need? I need you to yearn along. What is what is healthy about yearning and longing. What what's healthy about yearning and longing is not the negativity. I think about this many times. Some people, you know, when you learn, you yearn and you long for something, they say, "Oh, you're being negative." You've heard, RIGHT? YOU'RE BEING NEGATIVE. YOU'RE BEING NEGATIVE. NO, I'm not. No, I'm not. I'm being honest. And and and and PART OF HONESTY IS I miss this and I want this and I need this. That's healthy. Of course it's all good. Who Who are you kidding? Who are you kidding? IT'S NOT ALL GOOD. It's good. And it's all good, but but in a revealed way. It's not all good. There's a war. I mean, Tel Aviv, right around where my daughter is. A few days ago, there was mamish a blast. I don't have to tell you. You guys had it in B she. It's all good. Of course, it's all good. It's all from God. It's all good. But meanwhile, we're running like chickens IN SARAH PES. YOU GOT TO SHOP. HOW CAN YOU GO SHOPPING if maybe a missile's coming? And you have to find out, oh, where I'm going shopping. Is there is there a mikllock? Is there a bomb shelter? You know what I'm saying? It's I I I I when I think about it, I I just don't have an answer. I'm I'm totally distraught. Like, you know, what are you doing? It's before Pesak. Jews are running around to prepare for Pes for WHAT YOU FOR YOU GOD who says keep Pes AND AT THE SAME TIME YOU YOU YOU ALLOW THE these guys to throw these these missiles all over. THERE'S NO THERE'S NO SAFE place anymore. I mean we know is the safest place. But I'm saying you know YOU COULD ONCE SAY OH THEY'RE ONLY GOING YES TO TEL AVIV CENTRAL ISRAEL BUT JERUSALEAM THEY'RE NOT. Oh really? Well take a look at what was going on the last three weeks. up, DOWN, BACKWARDS, FORWARDS, NORTH, SOUTH, little moshim, little villages, little places hitting their own people. I'm not talking about and then here and there. I mean like no open sesame just shoot and go AND WHO CARES WHERE IT LANDS AND what it what it does, right? And then you ask yourself, so the answer is the longing. In other words, we don't have an answer, but there's the only answer is that we we long, we yearn. It it should call out a a stronger commitment to Hashem and to and to to beseech him, to pressure him, which you're allowed to do in this such a case. Meaning, Hashem, but what you know please stop. So all of this is encapsulated I'm just I just was elaborating it's encapsulated in these few words that nevertheless that there is this virtue of longing and yearning. Hashem said that there will be a day when there'll be the case. Now the next note is from the from in the is from the alterbased and it says you have to cover the bread the the the the matzah and you lift your cup and you say it's a very important paragraph. This is the has been that stood for by our fathers and for us. Just one alone has risen against us to to destroy us. But in every generation, for not one alone, sorry, for not one alone has risen against us, but in every generation they rise against us to destroy us. And the holy one, blessed be he, serves us, saves us from their hand. So of course, we rise for this prayer. It's not a brahisha. It's not a blessing. It's part of because if it were a blessing, you would have to fill up a cup here and say a blessing. Not a So it's not a it's not a new blessing. It's a it's it's a prayer. And the prayer is very powerful. Behe, the opening word of the prayer behe. The commentators rash I believe others say behe refers to faith. It's faith that's gotten us through. The he um kabadnik some kabadnik like to say he is an acronym for yud, right? Because you got you have vud and the 11th referring to the 11th of Niss the Reb's birthday the Reb's birthday the sadic theb Hashem sent the Reb into the world on the 11th of Nissan which is the Sunday he meets Hashem happens to be my mother's yard site as well it's her 20th yard site maybe should be in Gaden and come back already. So the bringing such special yeden and sadikim into the world like the Reb gives the generation the faith and this isn't just a a saying but some of our students in the ko are live examples of the reblim bringing people back to Yiddish helping them and they have families and families forever and ever eternity. And this took Debaba, a Jew who was born in Russia and a Russian a Jew of Russia mentality. Old Stettle comes to the free country in America in 1941, becomes Reba in 1551 and as a visionary lays the groundwork for an entire army known as theim, the messengers, the emissaries to reach out to others. So we could say with pride the one who was born on yud of the word viol and the one that was born on the 11th stands out goes against makes it possible to battle the opponent those that seek to destroy us to root out yiddisheskite. Understandably such a idea is is not a literal one and God cuz literally speaking about Hashem so we're not replacing Hashem but we're saying Hashem's AGENT THAT HE PUT INTO the world an intermediary like a mobb gives us that amuna and by the way that's the theme in the Reb's last that he gave us I hope to learn it teach that the the the Reb points out this thatu is the shepherd the ramna the loyal shepherd of all the yeden he says that he clearly says and he explains it so it's not a foreign idea mo to say that sadic is the individual who helps the generation rise up against obliteration against the enemies. I think it's important especially for to you know to at least think about it maybe talk a little bit about it with family in a way that's sensible etc. Okay, it's 9:15, so we'll stop here and uh meet Hashem. We'll continue tomorrow. Uh any questions or things that you'd like to share either of you, Velv? >> No, >> just um just want to say that exactly, Rab like you said. Um first of all, and everything single just like you said like trying to make pesa and do what we need to do here. My wife was in the grocery store earlier this week. It was a siren. She had to go into the big mlat with everybody. Um it's exactly like you said no. Um here in New Park um where I got to where I needed to go in. You have to be a little but you got to we have to keep going. We have to keep um prepare. We have to prepare for that we need to do just so you described it you know perfectly. I mean we keep going. Keep going with strength and will help you know. Oh man. See everyone tomorrow. Good day. Five.