Rebbe's Hagada #1a - History, Tell the story. Kiddush details, practical advice - RC Dalfin

So good today we're learning the Hag of the Reba. This is the first of the six six part series Hashem. So I want to give a general introduction to understand uh the Rebag. It was uh 1946 which actually is 80 years ago that the Reba received instruction from his father-in-law the previous Reb to compile the Kabad minhagim the Kabad customs in an organized way for the Pesak Sedar and the Hagad. Now, until then, the the the details of Kabadim were for the Seda were not were not clear. Although the Reb put together the Hayim in 1943, which also was part of the reason for that publication was to gather Kabad customs and to have inspirational thoughts for the day based on and uh instruction of the labbas of various times. But in a in in a systematic hagoda manner it didn't exist. So in you we could see kind of the trajectory of the previous Reb's desire the the way the way things were in Europe not only in Kabad but it for most maybe not by the yeis in Germany but for Most of Judaism, I'm talking about Orthodox Judaism, Toro Judaism, things weren't really organized very well. You know, this is the custom. You do this, you don't do this, this is the way we do it. This is the way the other people do it. That type of language and familiarity wasn't wasn't prevalent. Now, we do have of customs that go back hundreds of years, but I'm talking about the man on the street who was, you know, surviving even when he wasn't, you know, being pursued by enemies. Nevertheless, you had to make parnos, you had to make a living. and uh you didn't have time to think about well should I raise the cup 12 in 11 in or 14 in? I mean like come on and and I'll tell you something having European parents and and grandparents who live through this era that I'm talking about. I I I heard it. You know, I remember when when when I came back from Yeshiva, as I was growing and learning in Yeshiva in a in the free world and I would share sometimes with my grandmother something I learned as far as we do this, we don't do it this way, you know, and things like that. She kind of like dismissed it, you know, and she was uh a survivor. Came from a from a home with a father with a beard down to his, you know, to his belly button, you know, uh came from scholarship and and and andism, right? But the the the culture in Poland and in Russia as well was such that was such that this was not this was not important. What's important is you have to go to the mikvah before you get married. My grandmother told my my sister and maybe she told us too but I forget. My sister reminded me how how they would check on you if you're going to the mikvah before you get married. This is in 1935 Poland outside of Warso. The you know so what what was what was important then was the the the basic you know the DNA and and the basic ABCs. uh mind you you know of of of Yudishkite you know the the the details this way that that wasn't even though they you know they baked kalas let's say for latter kalas you know that was my wife's grandmother who was Russian kabad Russian so I'm not saying that they didn't keep mhogen god forbid but the the structure and the and be putting in writing and kind of this is the the forim and this is the for and this is the forim we we we didn't we didn't have that this is all a new phenomena and all I mean from post holocaust now within post holocaust itself I I would say that kabad labage the previousb andba were from the first or maybe the first who really put an emphasis on this. Now the the previous if you read his talks in the debur and other places you see that this this was very important to him. So when he comes to America in 1940 and he has an opportunity, he's not running for his life and he has a person like his son-in-law who is this you know genius scholar and he's so and he's also very well-versed in sciences and things like that. So he utilizes him to start documenting Kabad customs and in Kabad customs there are different customs. their customs of what's called for the household of the Raayan which we call in Hebrew Minhag the customs Bav of the the Reb's household and generally minav were not for the public in other words if one wants to emulate the rebas you could do that but inad was usually seen as as superficial you're not a reb you're not the son of a just know your place. Okay? Over the years, whether it's proper or it's not proper, not going to go into that. That's a whole faber for itself. Many more of these min um are emulated by the common. Okay. Now what the Reb does in this and what he did in the is he he kind of suggests if you pay attention carefully which min is just for the Reb's household and which min is also for every person and that's one of the unique things of this if you're aid or you want to follow the dabage customs then this is a must- readad kind of because it puts everything in its place. So for example, it tells you that a at a certain point where the the the world world meaning the Jewish world the the the Torah world will lift its cup, right? it's it lift its cup and cover the matzah. So, um the Reb will make a comment on that how he saw it by his father-in-law and how his father-in-law seemed to imply it should be documented. Okay. So, so I I say this because not everyone is following or wants to follow or needs to follow these customs exactly cuz unless you're kabad or and you want to have a seder, you don't need to follow all the customs. But I'm teaching that. So, please understand that that's where I'm coming from. That's one one one piece of information before we get into the text. The other thing is that when you when you understand that the Reb wrote this in 1946, he used his style. Every one of us writes based on our style. The Reb's style in writing is very succinct. This we saw we saw this here in 46 with the Hagada. We see it later in his discourses and sikas in general in general theba did not write his own you know that right the alterba didn't write his discourses and theba as a general rule didn't write his discourses when khan prepared that the rebba had said vbrang and he submitted to him the reb would make notes some notes on some things but he did not WRITE THEM. HE SAID THEM. So you know if it's on a tape you can hear the tape shabasive you had to memorize it and that's what we did through the process called review where every month of Shabas after Mala or having a Shabas meal uh we came back to 770 Arabel Khan would re be the lead reviewer of what he remembered from the fabangan and he did a good job at it. He remembered everything pretty much and there were bakarim and you know who were all around and some had good memories and they added to that and it was a two three hour um experience which is for another discussion. I I was there many times and it was a very special special experience. So but the Reb's style was when he did write let's say this is very succinct. So that leaves the reader and the student and the learner a hard job. We have to decodify his kind of brief notes. Okay. So in the hag that I'm using here, Rabbi Emanuel Shakat, who was a great Torah scholar besides a writer and a philosopher, he he did an excellent job in in doing some of that. So this hagoda is not a hagoda like you have let's say the hagod of the moral or the hagod of this sage and this person this rabbi they're writing in in great detail commentary on the hagod the reb is the rebba is looking to to to insert kabad customs into that hugger for right he's also looking to understand why the text which is based on the alterb the alterb the text of our hagod is the alterba's text it's not the rebba's text okay the rebb's text is the is the s succinct notes the commentary whose text is this it's from the balatana sid which differs ers from other texts maybe slightly sometimes but it does. So, by the way, as an aside, if you're using, let's say, the Maxwell House classical hagada that you might remember from your youth and your grandparents' home, it's a good haga, but it's not THE KABAN. NO PROBLEM. If you're using an art scroll aud, you know, depending on how and what you want for your seder, you should make sure you have the right agoda. You could have several audas, you know, but the text in in in the IS JUST LIKE THE TEXT in the and that includes val the vowels, the valization, um the the the commas and and and the words um etc. Again, I'm not not going into, you know, the Reb does some of that in in his commentary where he looks at the different uh textual changes between the alterbased our Hagada and others. That's part of his commentary and that's why it's succinct and it's it's brief and you need to really open it up because and you have to have tremendous knowledge. And that's the third point third third point of the introduction. When you go through the Reb's Hagada in in detail, which I I did with Aabusa several years ago, you will see that this man this person has so much knowledge of of all parts of Ta. It's amazing cuz he's not just giving you references to Gomorrah. Gomorrah, Cababala, Madrish, commentaries on the Hagoda. It it's really it's really u mind-blowing to see. In other words, people say the Babba was a genius of Torah that when you learn this, you will see it for yourself. You don't need to believe anyone. Just learn the I think this text in particular we just finished the Reb. You don't really see there Talmud his knowledge of Talmud. You don't see his his knowledge of um medish. He quotes a medish. Fine. But it's right. But in the Hagoda in his commentary, you see his vast knowledge of all parts of Torah. It's it's, you know, so that's just uh again a very fascinating thing when you when you're able to pinpoint clearly that the person who writing this commentary has this vast knowledge. So it gives the the reader and the learner he doesn't need to be aid he can be a litak he could bearic he could be anything if he wants to see a certain depth in in in you know the words and and in the text and and in the flow let him take a look at this this and finally one more point before we get to some textual things here. What did the Reb want with this Hagas? I told you he wants to to clarify customs for the seder in the Haga. He wants to clarify the the overall purpose of the hag. What is the purpose of the two words? You shall instruct and tell your child the hagada. As much as we want to pontificate and inspire uh adults, it's a very nice but it's the wrong timing. The timing the and I'm talking to myself because that's my interest right but the truth is that the time of the aoda is for children. Now if you have adults who are children because they don't have the knowledge so they fall into the category of children but the idea is you shall tell what do we read in one of the passages whoever increases telling the story of the exodus is praiseworthy. So there's a famous comment that's repeated over and over probably said by many different rabbis and and sermonizers called the more you increase in telling stories sapper seur stories your praiseworthy. So here you see how the haba is should be said in a story the haba is written in a story like manner and that's our job as parents adults to be to work on communicating the in such a manner and the reb has that in mind. Now, now you ask a qu uh you have to ask a question. HOW IS his commentary on the Hagada a story? It's it's scholarship. It's it's the epitome of scholarship that I just told you about. And I think that the answer is very simple. The more you understand the scholarship, the better you can tell the story. Because when you are studied in in in a text and it resonates with you, you can tell a very fine story. The less you're knowledgeable of it, the story the story is is NOT A GOOD STORY. IT'S you know so it so I want you to you know have this in mind as we as we learn the as much as we get we're not going to get to all of it but as much as we get to it that remember it it's that focus and understandably you know some of us like myself and maybe some of you who are not you know we're guests at another person's table by my I'm by my children you know so they lead my son leaves the the seder it's not my place to become as he asked me to. But you know, so we have to bear that in mind too, not to overtake the TABLE AND BECAUSE I WANT TO TELL YOU A STORY MY WAY, THEREFORE go to the side and that's rude. Okay. But at the same time, there's enough time sitting at a seder to share uh some thoughts. So I I hope that u you you will um gain from it. Any questions before we go into the text? Yes, Misha. >> Yeah. Um, Reverend Dolphin, I just want to ask maybe, and this is maybe my own thing, maybe during the next few days, one of the challenges I always have with the Seder, especially more recently, recent years, is like it feels like just to be able to get through everything um, and not to lose everybody, you know, is a challenge. So I asked myself like when is there even an opportune time to even share something and so forth. So I'm wondering maybe if there's an a moment there's opportunity maybe for you to give over help us or help me I with just some practical tips. >> Okay. Well I I hope that will be accomplished and I I I relate very well to what you're saying and that's what I I'll be doing. I'll be highlighting points and some of them you could share while you you're reading the hagoda and then the others during the meals some during the p the that meal the next day you know it's a very difficult thing to remember you have to keep the kids interested and you have to keep the flow going and another thing is to have other people. It should be interactive. Other people, you know, like if you have guests, if you don't mind, share a story, share something. DOESN'T HAVE TO BE 5 MINUTES, 3 MINUTES, 2 MINUTES, you know, and you if you're leading the seder, you have to sit down and organize how and where. And you can you know you use a pointer in your hagada which hagada you're using which which saying you want to you want to say over and then which you want to give to someone else to say things like that. So if you took the time before I I I I mean before the week before like next week you know when you have quiet time and you organize yourself you'll see you'll have a much better better say there. Um, >> Reb Revy, just just another thing on on Mosha's question. I was going to ask the same question, but just something just an added point. The the I I always find it that we're running until we get to like it's always this thing you got to, you know, before and and we literally make it by the skin of our teeth. But it that I think the pace I think that's something we should figure out like what we shouldn't be like that like we're like running you know like it's nice to tell the story and everything like that but like what things to stop and what things not to stop and what the pace is keep everybody engaged and finally make it to the aikoma you know with enough time to actually do it properly because really that's the most you know that's one of the most important things >> is okay so again Every one of us has a different section in the seder that we were turned on by, you know, we like most. I can't tell you that, hey, uh, this passage that I'm explaining, you must explain that. No, if that doesn't talk to you, then you don't share that. You don't, you know, you just read it and you go on and and and one second. And as far as the um the alpha kan the second, well, you don't do the second night. to narr but those of us in America you know there's no timeline we can go on uh but but the first seder um you just I think during the meal you have to kind of do I have more time or less time yeah and that's it's guess what it's one one night a year where you have to either make your meal shorter or longer that's what you have to do But not why why on why should you you know rush through the hagoda I mean really rush through it and and they do this by the way I know many kabat houses and you know cuz they're catering to a different crowd and in a different way. I mean, I I led a I led a seder for my daughter in Tel Aviv uh last year, right? I was there last year and you know, it was 40 50 people from all over, but there were parts I I had to rush through. I can't keep, you know, I got to mitzah, right? So, you want people to make matzah and to eat matzah. That's a mitzvah. And the same with Mora. So you're going to go into dashing on on every passage and they're gonna walk home. They're going to leave. So or in in the case of of of everyone here and their family and their grandchildren and all of that, you're going to lo the kids are going to not be involved. So I think that that's that's primary focus. And you decide during the meal if you have more or less time. That's that's my suggestion. Okay. I want to get now to the text. So >> just one just one question before you say which Hagada are you using? >> I'm using this Hag is called Hag. It must be six different vers uh six different prints and it was printed. It was translated by Rabbi Emanuel Shakat. >> It's English. >> Yeah. It has It has the Hebrew on one side with the Reb's commentary >> and it has on the other side his translation of the commentary. Not full translation of the commentary. He chooses, but he does an excellent job. And because he such can you check if we can get that here because I haven't seen it here in the swarm stores here. I'm I mean this has been reprinted or reprinted. I'm sure that uh they have it in the Kabad in Kabad or or maybe someone you know I imagine and and because because Rab Shak was such a authentic you know great scholar um it's very reliable you know his his comment his translation is is very reliable and again this is not a JI type of a commentary it's a different approach it's they just put out a beautiful new one I just saw it the the day and it's excellent for people who you know don't have much knowledge and it it's it's with colors coded and again if you think that's the one for you use it um but this is this is more of the classical reb with commentary so I I want to I want to talk about uh the kdesh and again I I'm going to tell you what kaba does and what others do as much as I So in most in most or many circles when you make uh kdesh on the night uh and the night of pes someone pours for you the cupad doesn't do that we don't have anyone pouring for us. Okay. Number two, there are some that not only pour the cup, but they place the cup in your hand. In Kabad, we don't do that either. Okay. >> Do they for benching? >> I'm sorry. >> They do it for benching in general the custom. >> Okay. No. Well, let let me say this. So what I saw by the Reba was that he Rabbi Menlik who was the Russa poured his cup of wine and then the Reb took it himself. He didn't put it on the Reb's hand that I did see. Now >> it's a common custom to put put to put it like in a person who's benching or something. >> Okay. And that's what >> that's not the custom. No, no, that's not not not the custom kabad. But again, all customs are holy as if they have a source. So now the night of Pesak, the four cups are are are necessary not just to drink half cups, but our uh custom is to drink full cups. Full meaning the entire thing. Now, it's better to drink wine if your health allows it, not grape juice. Therefore, if if you if you're going to have a large cups and drink only wine, um you you might get a little shiker, a little intoxicated. And if you don't want that, maybe you want it, but if you don't want it, get yourself a 3.5 ounce becker or cup, right? And speaking about that, it's better to use a becker than a glass. And it's better to use a glass than a plastic cup. And if you're going to use a plastic cup, according to the Misha Feinstein, you should use two two cups. too plastic because it gives it more hash. The whole idea is more importance and significance. You know, a flimsy cup is a flimsy cup. So, if you take two, it's less flimsy. But, of course, it doesn't compare to to a glass, which I've used. I mean, people I don't have behas for everybody, so we use glass, which is fine. But a beer, of course, is nicest. Instead, if it's a silver becker, it's even nicer because it's the night of freedom. So, we take out >> with with no with no stick. Right. >> Okay. So, the kabad custom is not to have what you call a stick or a what is it called? A base. But just a regular becker without without Yeah. Without that. But again, >> without without the stem. >> Without the stem. But but again, you know, someone asked me, is it better to use a becca with a stem according to kabad than than a than a than a glass or or probably a bea with a stem. Okay. But yes, now what is the particular way of holding the cup? And this is true not just for the seder night, but for every time you make kdesh according to the kabad custom as the writes it. You fill up the cup in in your right in your right hand. You transfer it to the left hand. This isn't of the Reb. So you when you have an English translation, you'll be able to read it on your own, but I'm just giving it over. Then you transfer it from the left to the right on the palm. You put IT ON THE PALM of your hand with your four fingers like this around the cup. So the cup is in the cup is in your palm. four fingers here and the thumb over here. That's the way you the becker is held and it should be at least 12 12 in from the table. So a lot of some people they HOLD THE CUP RIGHT DOWN. NO, IT'S SUPPOSED TO BE UP. NOT NOT UP OVER HERE, but you know 12 in 12 in, right? Then when you say the you lifted a drop, you lifted a drop, right? So, and the reason for that is because the wine is gura. The wine is coming from gvura which is strength but also discipline and justice. So you want the wine to go into a kali into a vessel. So when you not only into the cup but the the position of the palm putting it there is like the vessel the vessel and by having the five fingers which represent also the five powers of severity it's five of gura around the vessel then there's the integration between the kali of of of of kind of and gura and the integration works well. That's the one the reason I believe that the Reba writes a picabo. So again, if you're able to do that, do it. And and then you could do it. Once you learn how to do that, then do it. You'll do it every single time you have kdish. Make kdish. But again, pes night, you need to drink. And a lot of pe I've seen people they're they're not they're not careful. They're not careful. What they do is they leave over some wine, then they fill up the wine. No, every cup has to be completely finished, then you refill it. Okay? Now, if someone can't, so then if they need some grape juice, you mix a little bit. You know, you have to but but I I do want to say that that if you can't if you if you can, you shouldn't be drinking grape juice for the for the four cups of wine according to the kabad and not only but custom again. But if it's going to hurt you and whether it's diabetes or you know you know ask your local doctors here um what to do you know and and >> cuz cuz that's different rebi because I think most people hold roastes enough I think that's a specific kabad thing right >> well it it's definitely kabad and I can't say it's only kabad but so rov posts the majority of the cup that y is referring to throughout the year we follow that too but pes night because the four cups correspond to the four languages of guula and redemption and other reasons um we are careful to drink the entire cup and um if you're telling me if you're telling me others don't aren't careful about that I guess that's that's a difference >> not just about the Boston the Boston had got a Right. Okay. Right. Right. So, okay. Good. Thank you. First of all, tell so so is sharing that that it's not just he says in Boston they do the same thing. And that other point I was going to get to uh that you should drink most of the cup in in in A GULP IF YOU CAN. If you can. That's what he that's what he just cited and that's we do that too. But but again you know you have to you know be careful and not >> one thing in one gulp the whole thing. >> Most rubbo >> rubbo mostu >> you know you do your best you know. Yeah. And and guess what? Now, since you mentioned that, I'll skip over to matzah, which I'm not at yet, but supposed to eat the matzah within nine minutes or so. Again, they're different timing. 7 minutes, 8 minutes, 9 minutes. I'm I'm saying 9 minutes. So, not only and you have to really swallow it down at one time. Now, did you ever try eating a half of a Shura matzah, which is pretty much the kazayas, the shear of the kazayas, the amount? It's It's a hard job. And in in one second, in addition to being a hard job, it ain't a pretty job because the matzah you're leaning and you're eating and it's crumbling and you know, you want to look like a a mench, not an animal. You know, it's it's but that's what I do. I try doing it. I try as much. So you know it doesn't look great when you stuff yourself with a matzah but that's what it says you should be eat you should be you should to be begin with swallow the entire kazayas at one time. So you do as as much as you can you know you do as best you can but so if you just eat a piece of matzah and swallow it you're not doing that. And by the way, this is this isn't this is this is um you do as much as you can. So if you cover your mouth and you know and you just you know do it slowly, you can get I I don't know if the entire kazayas but much of it down. Okay. the the thing with the um with the cup that I mentioned before is important. Oh, I see we passed the time already because the night of Pes it's all about you know feeling rich feeling free right so we also put it's brought down in the hagoda you know some nice caim on the table if if you have that you know again there needs to be a b there needs to be a balance between you know luxuries and ostentation iousness which is not the spirit of PES to being ostentatious at the same time to be to have to have show freedom and and you know in that that that that mode. So um if you have a nice kay a nice dish it would be nice to take it out and you know put it on the table. Um if you could use it great even if not um some people you know they have expensive vessels and and they do that and these are a different different minimum. Okay so tomorrow we will learn more and uh join us. I'm glad everyone got a chance to to be here. Have a great day. >> Thank you. Bye >> bye. My bud.