Nasa Na 1938 #9- Apathy is bc of Ego ,- Warmth is Natural to Person - Opposites Attract

so we're on page 133 the next paragraph tv the name bahamas tells us what it is it's a behavior have you ever ever heard of saying you're a behemoth guess what we all have a behavior inside ourselves we're building or will the kaya but that's that's the other vilde but behemoth and guess what it's not out of the ordinary it's normal it's teva it's nature what's out of the ordinary is to be a refined jew living with the nephew shirley kiss you know the famous story that they say the the the boy the father comes to the rabbis is rabbi my son is meshuggah he says why is he suddenly sugar he wants to marry a non-jewish girl he cracked up the rabbi says if you tell me that uh that uh the the non-jewish girl that that the non-jewish girl that you know is is is something uh weird and strange and and you know and not normal i could hear why your son is not would be is also not normal marrying such a person but that he's married a non-jewish girl that's natural he's not for shabbat wants to have a pretty girl she happens to be non-jewish it's america so he's not meshuggah he's very normal except that he has a toyota that he needs to listen to follow but he's not there we have to work on that but don't tell me he's meshuggah in the vernacular sugar you know is it it i told you i i didn't repeat this in in a few years so probably if you you won't remember it but here we go i got a call one friday afternoon in the winter about 15 years ago a lady calls me frantically he says rabbi i have to speak to you i say it's a half an hour shot but she says i have to speak to you i said go ahead she says i see i read somewhere that you know cabola and you're a capitalist and you wrote a i said what do you want is that what you want so she says my son is crazy i said why is he so crazy because he met this girl she's a jewish girl ah okay next so what's the problem the problem is he wants to have a a non-kosher wedding in other words um they should not have a kosher meal my son is crazy so i said to her your son is not crazy i think that you and your son have to start talking more to each other this knows and so she called me think asking me if her son was possessed by a book i'm serious so she wanted to know me the capitalist you know if i could tell her if her son over the phone if her son has been possessed by a capitalist i swear this is what happened it was friday afternoon i like i it was like like a preparation for shabbos like no other i said no my dear uh we have here uh uh a relationship problem between a given shama and a modern son and you know an american boy probably just for europe or has still european stuff in her and he's an american boy and you know and all that so when we say the nephesh is a bahami and the rebbe adds the words with tv this behavior is natural it's not unnatural what's unnatural is to be a jew to be unofficially kiss that's unnatural in dalton evan that tanya teaches us that if that really if you're really plugged in and he tells us how it's really who you are but we're talking about on the outside on the surface the norm is bahami ello ki is not the norm so the next time you're confronted by someone who says they want to do something outrageous and you say this guy cracked up but she cracked up or that i'm not normal or how could this be and you're all beside yourself stop and just ask yourself in my way in my own way do i act sometimes like a behemoth oh yeah why because it's natural to overeat and oversleep and overdoing and i justify no why for that person is it not natural for where he or she is to be a behemoth that's without that but that's what the british rapper says back to the text and therefore the curry midas what's the primary mode in which behavior expresses itself in emotions you know the concept of intellect being silent but deadly it's true but it's not the main area of of of bahamut of animalism animalistic the bahama youth the behemoth expressed itself in emotions and love and fear and in guilt and in mercy in every kind of way you know i have compassion of someone and i helped them and then they killed themselves right we just went through this this week and it's the hot topic of the week right probably a lot of these innocent girls and boys who didn't say anything had mercy because he writes them and tells them he's going to commit suicide anyway i don't want to go into it but that's misplaced misplaced um compassion that doesn't mean you have to go and and and and you know a person all over i'm not taking a stand on that i'm not ruling it's about just talking out loud in conversation but there is misplaced compassion so the question i'm sure you've asked yourself and i've been asked the question what do you do in shul if you know that there's someone who's been accused of um child abuse etc what do you do moisture is a god buying the shule ah wasn't god whatever what do you do i asked this question i asked it to suffer abundant because people asked me this question and the rebuttal that i spoke to doesn't mean there's no no different opinion they said you're obligated to let people know uh you know that there's someone here that's you know been accused but you don't have you're not obligated to ostracize him from sure not let him into the show that's what they said to me but yes people have to know in fact one of the letters that i read online about the situation is the oh rabbi eisenmann of passaic wrote this long letter i don't know if you read it so he calls for it's online so he calls for he says you know um it's really it you know if you if your son or daughter your daughter is going to babysit you shouldn't be sending him themselves in the car that the parent picks him up so he writes i mean that's his suggestion you know it it it's come down to that um you know when you hear about a prominent person who did so much and you can't trust them anymore it really shatters the the trust level of people and and there's no way around it you you you're not gonna have anyone you know like uh oh i'm gonna check in and tell you you could trust me and prove myself it's that's not never gonna happen okay let's get over it so you have to take the defense methods to protect your children so anyway i don't want to get into this the point being is the icarimedus the primary area in where the bahama expresses itself is in the emotions albumin nevertheless now the rabbit says on the second line if you think about it i'll be this what use do i have of it says the rabbit yes it does have a great virtue wow tell me about it and he says um it's one of its milos one of its virtues is velvel that it is act the word in english is act says great in yiddish in hebrew it is a a a an energy of ram that is apt to have emotionalism his palute and what's special about that tells us the rabbi that the lulu is the root of the word is the from the line before the last word the teva leos the nature of of this adaptation let his spoil to emotionalism humility that's my contention there's not enough hugging i'm serious not enough warmth what absolutely did 50 60 years ago the colonel was very pure and and right give the person a hug a man to a man a woman to a woman but the point is you know and i see it i just said my my son-in-law ellie he's the the rabbi at the i'm telling you what catch people they've told they've come over to me old young middle age is he'll give the guy a hug when he comes into shule he got him that's it it everything else will follow the warmth the emotionalism there's not enough of that it's all did you do your did you get a good mark did you do your homework now i understand there needs to be prince rules but it's gone a little too far we have to really put back into the school system but what i i feel that even though i you know was in the 70s and i had my rebbies who were survivors but they were holocaust survivors right they were holocaust and i felt that warmth exude through the tests and through the learning and that schlepped me and schlepped us and pulled us to want to be like them to want to to want to learn better you see so the rabbit says here the nature of the nepheshabamis is such that it's ready and wanting to be emotional there are some people that are always cold over t by a limit spoil and by nature they don't they don't become emotional and the rapper says something fascinating the next line don't think that they're not emotionalism abram is because intellectually they're blocking their emotion you hear that avi says they're born cold-blooded you know like you say as far as farting a cold person is a counterfeiter excuse me i need some water please a cold a cultimench it's not that the intellect is elegant you be cold no we're not talking about that another why moisture why because the rabbit's argument is by nature the natural tendency of every nephesh obama's is his pa it's act it's ready to be emotional to be warm so why isn't it the answer is because sometimes the nature of the person is such that they're cold let's see how he develops it the hey numbers the clubhouse i have this bait saying the zoo although generally speaking the difference between intellect logic and emotions it is the sacred machine is patience and calmness right thoughtfulness don't rush think it over umidos and the emotions hey historaxxus the spiders this is a very good uh comparison and definition of the two i'd like you to make a note about this right here seijo he tells the circle has two things in it to be muscle right which means car patient for his joshua's to be settled midos emotions are just the opposite is to get very worked up right the his spy looked and to get very mispa to get very emotional so therefore you're causing yourself to become very feeling okay okay but but but the pilot is excited you're coding yourself right right right thank you thank you that's the word i was looking for thank you excitement thank you very much that that's a better word than the emotionalism in this case the excitement very good but look at the next line patience and set and settlement but does not equal being cold see people making this excuse me people make a mistake johnny thinking who are the who are the patient people the cold type of people says that but no it's a mistake no there's a difference between cold and being patient you can be a very warm person and if you've developed yourself to have patience you'll be patient and and at a time when you get involved or do whatever it is you're very warm so that's why it says aino it is not similar to kri root the codes in the closest who aim them he goes back to his point apathy apathy is not because the person's logic and mind dictates be cold excuse me this is his nature and his habit to be without i guess excitement feeling cold in other words the opposite of excitement the opposite of feelings so where does it come from it says that i'll tell you the big secret it comes from a roof he says rove not always but usually it comes from yeshut ego the abbas atmo and self love in other words you're involved with something which calls for excitement as your innocence said so beautifully why aren't you excited why why you standing like a cold fish because you have a deep ego and like who cares who cares have you ever been in a situation where people are all excited about something and you go over to someone and he's standing there like a cold blooded you know i don't want to use the word but you know what i mean and yeah why the answer is because he everything in front of him is meaningless to him because he feels that he's better than them and all of this is nonsense you know a person who is a big shot inside a very a big shot like what are you stupid like wasting your time and i i don't want to say who because but a great scholar he came into uh to someone's home and the person and he looked on the bookshelf he had a big library he looked at a library and he saw a certain safer and he turns to him he says what are you doing with that safer in your in your bookshelf so he says um i bought it i got it i'm not using i look at it it's a good it says stop wasting your time they were very very sharp and and and i'm going to call a spade a spade in this area he was a big shot the rapper would have never said that never in a million years guaranteed the three the canada would have never said that that rashad would have never said that because in this area they didn't have ego they eliminated their ego and others didn't so ego was a very very subtle thing and i think i told you but i was discussing this yeshua the other day this idea of bitter hayes is is such a chabad concept although it's not it's not originated but you won't find in any hasidic community such discussion and such wordage and such elaboration on the concept of the yesh and the the ego and the obliteration of ego but then obey him from the outer rib from his lakuti torah from his tanya that is a main theme and my friend professor david seaman of emory university hashomer shabbos genius harvard graduate he was writing i hope he's going to do it a book on beetle from the chabad perspective because he hold in and he understood that the chabad unique approach is bitter you know uh in the ish but says right ish but it's a swarm it's another nakuda a very important one but a whole different aspect the cutscer has their aspect moisture is going up to tetheria that it's a deakin there right the kawasaki the vodka you're talking about the your rebels a great great sata the worker it's a whole different notion i'm giving you a little a little food for thought my um it's a whole different notion in the hasidic world they don't talk much about this yes khabad and you know that famous uh saying which has to be said and understood in the right context but i think it's worth mentioning three hasidic groups bresliv gair and khabad wrestling is always speaking about simca and they and many of them are very depressed very uh hard on themselves not happy you know gair casitas caught scared emma's cut skills don't do anything for truth and the saying on the street is they're the the biggest false people around hobart is always talking about bento obliteration itself and the building the biggest bali geyser it's a joke but there's truth to it but the fact is that obey it so we're learning over here it's a fascinating thought you know hilo's not here it's good to see how you would see this from how the psychology see it i i tried getting rabbi doctor of ron twersky when i interviewed him it's in the interview my book conversations with the rebbe i i asked him about he he taught tanya in pittsburgh and i was i and i asked him about these things and he said some which is but i would love to have continued seeing how he from a psychological perspective understands this idea this is one of the ideas here but the rabbit says that kriros apathy comes primarily because of yeshua's self-love not because the mind tells the person be cold i mean i think that's a very very interesting um something that can be studied and and discussed and developed yes my shoulder can you just repeat that again please yes the rabbit says here the previous says very important to know that he says usually you have the words my shirt you haven't yet vala rove usually most times cree root apathy yeshut it comes because of the yash of the ego and self-love meaning and it's not because the mind blocks the feelings from going to the heart and being excited and emotional it's not because of that that's a very very uh telling statement that that needs a lot of discussion and you know what i'm saying he says it but it you know prove it why how but that's what he says then he says let's continue another few minutes but yes then you have someone whose nature is calm he's warm um and he gets excited emotionally spoiled and excited but not killed very easily as the vernacular goes by as people say in yiddish this is a good yiddish expression the word for heat and temperature in yiddish is avi hits our author in 1921 had typhus he was very sick in it he always died from the from the high temperature that he had so huss had said to him and he was speaking and it's not you know you you have such temperature you could sound cuckoo sugar you could say things that so someone said from hits he's talking from heat and then later the comment came be very careful saying that about the fleet of cadet you know you don't want to play with him a hitsui mensch means a hot blooded passionate person who is easily excited and not let's the next few words and when he does something he does it with excitement but look at the next words lit he doesn't do it calculate it and that's why sometimes we ourselves or others do something and it it it throws us for a loop but if that person is the type that is a hit to get a mensch is a hot blooded passionate person what he does is it's not calculated so for us if we're more moisture the proper type of person it's wild i'll give you an example i'm finishing now a pictorial book that i told moshe about and many of the pictures are of my spirit of yo khan so someone sent me a picture last night and i had to i had to quickly get it into my designer because i it was great it's a picture in 1983 they're in the catskills in parksville new york up there by liberating next to liberty new york and it's each year they have for the rabbit's father's yard says since august of 83 and rabbis from all over the world rabbi farkas from yerushalayim robbie castillo farkas rabbi sago from jerusalem joseph segel from los angeles my friend robbie steinmetz from detroit you know tell me the idea is to bring the the top torah scholars of the bavavic of chabad all in one setting for one weekend to talk tora disgustor of our brain so you have all these people arabic shocker i think is like talking and they're all standing around the table and you have raviol khan conveyor without a hat jacket with a hand on a soda pot on about a soda bottle on a bottle it's such a telling picture of who the man was he was totally totally in a different world and they're all formal you know what i'm saying hats and jackets and rabbis and he could put them all in his little pocket looks like me with my suspenders people have commented on my videos we love your videos because of your suspenders i'm talking about paul parker's i'm not talking to you guys in bed sherman you guys are cool but the power pack are so s are so narrow a rabbi speaking words of torah teaching and he doesn't put on a hat and jacket right what a crime so i have a friend he's a good friend i love him he says i love your videos because of your suspenders it's uncalculated that's what i learned from repgio i mean happens to be he i and others are that style but the concept is that you need to know so sometimes when something happens to you well let's say you know a relationship with a spouse what if one spouse is more calculated and the other the other spouse is less what if one spouse is more cold and one is warm what do you do you can't make a go of it yes you can if you know the the what what's the trigger you can make a relationship work but you really have to figure it out and respect each other's strengths and deficiencies now you can have a good marriage but if if if the cold one expects her or him to be like he or she is cold that pathetic calculated or the warm one expects them to be always passionate or warm you're going to have a big you can have a breakdown you're going to have constant bickering and fighting and that's not the way it should be where does it say the traitor that spouses have to be exactly alike i mean sometimes they're more alike they're more similar and other times they're not and guess what it can be great my wife and i you know she comes from certain parents i come for certain parents we're different in many ways 37 years married you could work it out if there's respect and there's understanding and understanding i clearly say of the differences not understanding what we share in common that's a given but of the differences and to grow from each one's differences you can have a great marriage you can have a great relationship you have a and the same is true with already a teacher and students sometimes i'm sure if you think back about your teachers and your professors over the years in school and in yeshiva wherever you went to and you know sometimes i didn't relate to that teacher i didn't relate to that read the question the question is why why not why didn't you relate to them and it could be you were too immature to find a way to understand who they are where they're coming from for you to make that relationship work continue next monday have a great job as my vaccine make the best of it great learning together have a great day everyone said bye bye good job good job thank you very much