Maamar Choviv Adam 1940 #5 - differences bet people? Intellect & Emotions Wholesomeness

uh in the mimer hub of adam which is dated latvia aimer so it's a day that's associated with la boheme and next week is a lot better so that's why i chose the bimer where i skimmed the third ice the third chapter versus the next part of the mishnah where it says beloved is israel this refers to an official kiss not just to the human soul that every human being has the human intellectual soul but to the jewish soul to the shaman so his question is so why is it that the mishnah prefaces beloved is man before beloved is israel before beloved is israel and since pierce has written to us yidden first that you say have even israel and only afterwards circle you turn down your your mute yourself because we hear the radio in the background in you the idea is the nixie if it says the alternative brings this verse in chapter one of tanya where it says souls plural it doesn't say for the shama it says with the sham plural on thee i god cease he have made says the altar burned out in the previous rabbi cites it here change stainer fossils this refers to two souls that's why the language in the in the verse is plural refers to the animal drive on efficiently kissing the godly drive shame they're opposite in their very core essence sha nefer shaliki is the primarily its function is mind is logic is intellect although it also has an emotional component avo who's sickly biasing the core essence of the nephrogenetic kiss is holy cycle and the and the emotions are subordinate an adjunct to the seiko the hamidah is lame how what's the perception what is the function of middles of emotions in the nephili kiss the rapist uses now a new word which we haven't had before which is schleimut the wholesomeness of if you want seiko we spoke about this yesterday without using this word so now we introduce a new word in regard to the seiju lamido scenario if you want the cycle to be mushlam to be complete and wholesome it needs a component of needles if seiko if mind doesn't have a component of emotions then that seiko is incomplete like we discussed yesterday the the the the abstract professor who completely is in the world of cycle and there's no emotions attached to his seiko or his one particular cycle comes off looking very strange and very weird behind the ancestor to be wholesome to be muslim and the word muslim was used always in a very positive way if you said about someone he is a muslim that was a very high compliment in other words not only is he one who is strong in one area but he's strong in many areas he's complete he's wholesome that ebb says here that we need slamus in seiju how do we make seiko if it has a component of me dot of meters that come along with the seiko true those medos are a component of seiko it doesn't change the fact that the the the the core essence and and and the person as he's known is a balsejo a man of intellect ruled by intellect but nevertheless there needs to be a component of middles but that becomes in seijo is only when there is um the purpose of the component of midot as they are in seiko they are muslim they complete um from the root word ms and they make truthful as american the mind commandment as the sage says one second commandment as the sage there is no wise person as someone who's gone through one second i'm okay let's continue i really apologize i hope it doesn't happen again it's the connection i'm having big issues okay so so the the listen to the the quote he says the the ghazal say ain't bala you know we talk about people being wise because i'll say if you didn't go through the experience which means if you didn't go through the test the trial the tribulation you're not a you're a big good speaker you have a gift of the gab and you can aspire and you can talk but if you didn't live through it you're not a friend of mine always said that anyone that has a number on their arm you can ask them for a bracha don't ask them how religious they are don't ask them how not religious they are if they had if they went through the the camps and the nazis and maximum they they already they already paid their dues you can ask them for a broker right someone who lives through an issue that individual is already why because he had the sayon let's continue because it's the wisdom that withheld with stood stood for him with sacrament of apollo to correct issues but middlesbrough experience gives you the ability and gave this individual the ability to correct his middles and his conduct but if you didn't have then his soyun then push comes to shove you never know how the person will act a famous story with a a rabbi forget his name in the seventeen hundreds rabbit steins also would always repeat this it was a famous person who was known as a as a rav there in poland somewhere and someone came to him and said and he was a businessman too he had business the business was the lumber you know cutting having the lumber cut and sending it down the river and that's how they began building houses and things railroads was very successful so the person was learning the gamora in brachas talks about you know to ben to thank hashem not only when things are obviously good but even when things are seem bad you should thank hashem it's gemara of course so the person said to to came to the rav and he said rabbi i i don't understand this because um you know just the other day i lost a lot of my money and how am i supposed to deal with it and so the ref said what do you mean it says in the casal and you have to believe and you have to have been talking well a day later he came to the rough and he says i have to let you know some news but your logs that and all of your business that you you know that you do there was a terrible uh flights of flights it means a um storm and all of it got lost and got burnt ruined and you lost all your money and when he heard that he collapsed on the spot and he woke up he said to him i thought you told me it's a good morning and what's the big deal you know when it happens to you then is the test do you withstand the test or not and that's why the other story they tell over the the the city gesture and the sugar in their right everyone comes to the city square to have a good time to see how he makes himself crazy and there's one person standing there who's crying and he says why are you crying he says because that's my son in other words when you when you look at someone else you could laugh and joke but when you know it's your own son your own child it's not funny it's real and kabbalah okay sometimes you go to a lecture in this way they're pontificating and they're dashing and they're saying and it should be this way in that way did they go through it and then you can have someone else that has no crowd coming and he gets and he's asked to speak and everywhere that comes out is is shattered his torn is hurt because he went through it it's real and can balance saying so the rabbit says here the meadows listen to the point the meadows are the balhani soyon for the seiko you can be so bright and so articulate it's all seiju but if you didn't have if you don't have the media's component to express that brightness and that seiko your cycle is worthless it's not real it's in the world of psycho has nothing to do with the real world that's why the embassy and he uses another word which i love it makes the cycle true because we all know there are people who are gifted with seiko and you don't know if what they're saying is true or not or in fact you think you know that what they're saying is narushki but they can explain and they can speak well and they can everything and they take you for a ride and they mislead people and it's happened before and it's happening now and it's going to happen a smart person knows they say that demonstrate the teachings of that say ho then that cycle is authentic and if not that seiko is still questionable and could actually be bad wrong no good te zaru be careful and this is true in our life ain't on the side is that used in contemporary hebrew in modern hebrew uh it seems like a great word to know i know it seems like a radio i i'm not the expert here in modern hebrew maybe someone else knows i i i i don't think so i haven't heard it but uh i never heard it yeah but uh it's certainly worth the revival yeah yeah it it is it is certain words classifies users uh not just capacity the citizen general are are worth her revival it's like we got we got to put them on tick tock somehow we'll get the word the my optos on tick-tock and everyone will be jumping up and down anyway going back to our our appointed hand godly soul is an intellect in its very essence and the nephew is primary meters so in other words although we said what we said a moment ago the importance of middles to be met to to certify that the seiko is right and proper nevertheless let's not confuse seijo middles that's what it says now he's talking about middles although middles must also have a component of seiko in it in addition to the shackle that is applicable to meters their seiko in other words i wish to justify and explain what i want so by someone who's about me those it begins with me those and seijo is just a subordinate tomidos so in other words if i have a certain feeling and i would not and i don't associate any logic to it i'm like an animal so i say i don't want to be like an animal so i will find justification to what i want so moisha what drives that person the want the desire the middle the emotion a child right you're in your child i want this i want this i need this i'm going to have this and from there you say well my my mother and my father are not going to give me the money for this because i can't go there so i have to make up a cockamania excuse excuse the expression to why i should get this to why i should have this and they come up with a plot and guess what not only children do it but we do it also so the amount of cycle in that scenario is subordinate to the meters that's what he says here look inside the hover master of life the amount of sacral used there is to explain to understand why this is good for me and to intellectualize and to smart myself with eich to justify how to attain hadavarahu the item that i want to find these tricks deceptive ways to increase my wealth amass my my mass my mass masses and and wealth the doula and greatness covered in honor of kai governor so there are people that are driven by honor they must be honored they feel they're nothing unless they're honored but if they come into the show and they'll say maisha prawn give me master why because i am a big shot i am great mike lebron will tell him uh my friend someone already scheduled her mouth dear and um i can't give you master really much would like to say you know hey you know you're such a bad guy that you don't deserve after but moisture is too nice and he's they're doing the right thing as a gabai you want to you know keep the peace in the show so you tell him it's already taken but this person won't stop won't stop if he sees he can't get motion to give it to him he'll go to another goblin and he'll have one guy by pressure pressure the other god by and if it doesn't work he'll go to the rabbi and if it doesn't work the rabbi he'll go to the bellabot and we'll give big money to the show and he'll concoct all kinds of ideas why he deserves mouth there why because he's driven by honor he must have that honor he must stand on the bmw and everyone should hear him if you give him a little shv or a little hog my little galila he says nothing and if you think i'm making this up this is real life my friends i don't know if it's real life in the in ash kodish but it's real life in many places i've actually seen people storm out of shulls because they weren't given the right honor from their perception right so this is honor that drives the po what we're giving aliyah yeah so this is this is this is a a a a need that this person has because he's a palmidos the media that that talks to him is honor and so is true with other types of middles okay so that evan says the person has to have some kind of argument why should i give you laughter if the other person already has them after it's scheduled to have master so he'll find something out i'll say oh he didn't go to the mikk for today how could you give him an aliyah he didn't go to the mikveh if you're talking about nakasik he didn't learn hassanas before davenink he doesn't have a beard ah you know he doesn't wear a guy tool going to the moonkacha schule in that little crummy that little dilapidated building where they found over there that uh molester so hiding over there which i met too when i was there in right so there used to be guidelines on the wall and the guideline says very clearly if your wife doesn't cover her hair with a tickle you are not allowed to go to the omit or to the show where my son is uh rob in in tel aviv on right that show was started in 1939 and 44 when they got out and they saved they survived they continued in tel aviv it's called kasam when it was in that when they were diving there had a prominent rabbi and there was a i saw it because when my son-in-law took over the show was it was given the show to make it into something because it was close for 15 years full of dust and schmutz and everything i was in there that was that russia and i happened to be there so i helped him with the minion i darvened and whatever and blow the shelf or whatever so i saw the sign the sign was still up and the sign said clearly if you shave during the three weeks you cannot go over to the oven i saw it they were han hockeys that was their day in other words the the the ashkenazim were not against shaving but if you shave during the three weeks right you can't go to the other so in other words someone will come up with all kinds of reasons i have a beard he doesn't have a beard how could you give him mafia this is a hasidic shoe it's not you know you you're wrong gaba you're really not right whatever that anyone will make up all kinds of excuses narushka right yeah it's not your business you're not the gabba you're not the rabbi and and and that's not one of our min hug him in the shoe if it was if it became a minute and the rabbi substantiates it okay but that's not so that's it the point being is that when you when you're about middles whatever you meet there is you are going to you're not going to stop till you get your way and you're going to use seijo to find justification and it's a very devious and this happens often where people concoct all kinds of ideas smart ideas and what's at the core is bad is evil is is is wrong is ego that's at the core but they don't want to say that to you because they look bad so they and yet this is the word bob puts him means um you polish they polish themselves they make a nice facade and they come up with a great excuse yes he will i've got a good story about this um please uh the uh the old tone the river of yochanan used to go to the basis wheel of gear first for akafos and in gere like many of the polish ubuntu they had a little safer torah that only the rebels would would dance with right and so uh when when the tallner river walked in the uh the gerber handed him this safer torah and to dance with and uh so um one of the one of the hasidim that went to the rabbi and said uh you know rabbi i can understand if only the rebels if only uh if that's all that's safe for tories only for the rebels but if you're going to give it out there are other people here who are who are worthy of that uh to dance with that safer terror the beaches will answered him and said that safer torah can only be held by somebody who knows they're not worthy to carry it very good and since you mentioned gare i remember the stories that uh someone wouldn't wasn't wearing the strimo you know they it was a moderator it was a gareth hustle but he came from the europe and and uh he decides that everyone's coming to give shulam you know you come to the rebel to give shulim you can't say how could he go by the rebel without his triangles he puts on a spot if the garrow wears buttocks he go now he feels good now that ebb is going to see him with his body he'll enjoy it and he comes by and then ever says to him afraid of him come on just putting on the striper you all of a sudden you changed but he had that need to be accepted you know so it comes in all forms of shapes and um we all have our issue whether it be honor or ego or or wealth or or or we want people to feel we're compassionate it you know the point being as it goes back to the mind here is that the seijo justifies the media the emotion that's sacral of rome is subordinate it's a component it's not pure intellect this person is an emotional person and by the way since we always talk about about relationships it's true in relationships too people sometimes fall into mistake or they think that they want to marry an emotional person they want to marry an intellectual person and what they don't realize is that it could be that that emotional component or that intellectual opponent is not who they are it's just a subordinate and then as life goes on you find out hey i thought i thought they were emotional and that's what i was looking for i thought they were intellectual and really in that you know what i'm saying and that's not there because there was a misassessment in who they really are and they picked up only on the kids and the superficial and that began and that spoke to them and then when things get uh you know tough and and and the real self comes out and the real self could be the person's cold or a person's warm you know and all that and and we have this we have this in the in in breakups and relationships i'm sure you know hillary could talk much more about it but that that's a problem where you misassess the person now in a wholesome marriage where there's real other real love and it's based on torrent and and commitment that's not a reason to to drop a marriage it's a reason to readjust and see how to deal with the situation and you can have a wonderful marriage even if you're two different people and by the way the arizo the reason why he talks about first marriage second marriage is not suggesting anyone here second marriages are not going into them to say but he talks about it he says he says it could be that on the tree of life there it's higher that two people that are together doesn't mean they come from the same source see people make a mistake they think bashar equals coming from the same source that's not what it means but sheriff means god wants two these two people these two souls to be together but guess what it could be your souls come from different branches of the eight sky ah the arizona right but let's say i mean you hear these horror stories right you hear people like my cousin she got married she was married for a week it was mama shahara story like and i'm sure people are like is that considered to be i mean okay not bashar but that's what hashem wanted i mean or maybe the person went against hashem by doing something stupid uh you and i are not hashem so we all dancers we really don't know but one thing that we do know based on what torah guides us is that it was it was from heaven that they should be married for a week whether it was for tikkun who knows maybe that week some tickle needed to take place between these two souls and they needed a certain tickle and guess what that thinking could be the divorce you know you don't want to think about that but it could be that the ticking was that they had to get married go through the the the love you know the loving scene of harmony of marriage and then break up because of a past who knows but the fact that in other words so what i'm saying to you is that everything's been ashamed so as you positioned it is yes it's from heaven what's the cavanagh i don't know and we could you know look at different aspects and these aspects are discussed in in but only at sadiq who really knows these things can say can saying usually does not say you know oh you went through this because you're the shaman unless gilgal was in this situation and uh let's say i'm just going to throw out let's say you were too much in love and you gave him too much and you compromised on your standards so hashem says i'm going to have them remarry later in another gilgal and go through a breakup to to to atone for that uh too much love i'm just throwing it out who knows or or infatuation or an infatuation for sure infatuation for sure but the question is why is that infatuation to begin to begin with so you can go even further why she'll say well the person made that decision yes you have free will but what is it from on high so these are things that again we look into the cabal and to the arizal he but the point i just wanted to make was that that when we talk about real seiji it's it's a broader topic you know we re it's a much broader topic and it's very important to you know in yiddish we say is the word health and cup how to means to hold cup your head in english it doesn't does it doesn't sound well it means stay cool chill don't get flustered there's an issue here we're going to look at it and that's what the alizah when you learn at izal he looks at the issue in an objective way in a torah way in a kabula way and you know i think i've told you siblings that argue there is a sibling rightly that reason says clearly because they're both nurturing from the same branch the same source and each wants more nourishment how does it express itself and fighting with each other or sometimes hating each other so so here we're going to go to psychologists psychiatrists put them on ad pills and everything and guess what you're not going to change the situation doesn't mean you should try you have to try you have to try much but it could be it could be and again we don't know so you know i remember when i spoke about these things at a lecture and actually in the shul and collins the big show i think i told you this many many years ago and uh um everyone was you know it was a captivated audience and everyone was interested in listening it was on a jumpth before minha and one guy i saw kind of walked out a young guy and it was noticed to me it was obvious that something's not right so after midnight went over them and i said did i offend you he says yes you did i said what did i say that i offended you he says you said that arizona says that sometimes a second marriage is more your soulmate than your first marriage he says i got married a week ago i'm not looking i i don't want to hear that i said okay i understand i understand but you you know i i was giving a lecture on a topic but you know so he was right from where he's coming from and i was right where i was coming from but you know two of us i mean the message that i was delivering the torah i was sharing and where it's coming from he wasn't ready to hear it and i and i really i respect it the point is when we talk about seiji limits let's not forget that there is a primary and an ancillary a icar and a toefl and even if you went into a marriage or you go an employer an employee or a congregate with a rabbi the the the intelligent person is able to sit back and look at the greater picture and yeah maybe the end of the day this school is not for you the style of this show is not for this you know so go to another show but don't write don't be quick to judge and say they're bad they're wrong no you're neshama and your style is very different and we cannot for whatever reason we cannot cater to that but the shoe down the block can cater because they're that style some people love ashore as a balagam they love for sure where time is not a time and you know when things are flying that's that's that's the way they are that's where they should be that person put him in an environment where shul is very exact and prompt and and all that they they get their their fish out of water and it gets very upset right so it's important that we have a guy by here to to to really when people come in and they're looking for a show i'm just using this as an example not to pick on you um you know it's important to understand where they're coming from what their needs are etc and the same as in a marriage and the same as an employee but you have to know the background and this is what why we learned that countries i always go back to because if you understand those principles what he wrote what the previous endeavor writes over there you'll have bet we will have much better relationships because he says where does this child come from a wealthy home or a poor home a wealthy community of pork beauty how is he raised what was the discipline in the house you know you know unfortunately in schools you know a principal a teacher has so many students so he or she is overwhelmed but i was talking here to my my daughter-in-law here in florida you know and one of the children was tested and and of course it was very expensive and and they don't have those funds but it felt it was necessary so i asked her now it's you know months later i asked her you know do you see a difference she says yeah the difference is in us and the parents we now understand what the way this break the brain of this child works so we can deal with them differently and i said that's very nice but when you send them to school the teachers and the principals going along for the ride and they told me and i was very impressed yes so the teacher says don't give them a written exam don't give this this child a written exam give them an oral exam and of course you don't do it in front of others because the other students will get jealous us you make right the answers and and this student you you just question them orally so you do it privately but they work with you if they work with you that means they they're they're so that it justified the expense because then you can help this child and this student grow this these are things that when we talk about sacral and middles that are just as relevant if a child is is is by nature about middles a very emotional child and you try to discipline them and educate them using the angle of seiko you lost that student you lost them take that same student and one second motion take that same one second measure take that same student and give them the intellectual element um i'm sorry the emotional element and they'll thrive and they'll become the best student they'll feel a million bucks and then you have them yes i was just gonna add that it's interesting i think we've probably spoken about this many times in the course of this year i think it's interesting that we see that many times children and young people who are struggling the ones who are struggling with we'll just say for this lack of a better term the ones who are struggling with yiddish kites yeah are the ones who are the most sensitive yes they're the most yes and how they need they need we see time and time again that they need they can't just handle you know like cold you know black and what they need they need needles they need love they need understanding and um and they need and they need a good hug from their teacher for sure sure and and that's and that's what i i won't i will keep on saying it that's what all the schools need today both boys and girls schools and both for children and teenagers someone was not a rebbe and a rabbi but like a you know a friend who who who is a friend with the students that will go so far especially for those students that you identified it'll go so far it'll go so far and and and and it ain't caballon is saying it's been proven it's been proven that that such students became in the past the greatest people because someone loved them embraced them you know didn't look at their marks you know played with them took them for pizza took them for bowling took them to a ball game went for a walk went swimming with them just sat and hacked the chinese you know rapping and talking about anything because then they they they put their confidence and you become their confidante that's what each student needs a confidant and when you have a confidant and the person is a proper confidant they'll do wonders for them but i i i i agree with what you said before that most times those that are struggling are more sensitive and a good mechanic and a pr and a parent who knows what they're doing in will pick up on that and um and give them the space and explain in a sense in a refined way to the other siblings this is what they need and yes you know it seems like they're getting preferential treatment and you're not you know because that becomes an issue why is he or she being treated this way and i have to do it you know the regular way and and and this is something that uh um we really need to inculcate more in our families and extended families and and community um i i think that this is it's crucial it's crucial if you want to keep the kids involved and excited again they might not be i'll tell you i'll end with this when my son was having a hard time yeshiva at 14 15. so i spoke to an uh you know a psychologist educator in borough park uh i think halberstam ortorsky a prominent name and another and i remember i remember exactly where i was i was laying in my bed and talking to him and he said to me over the phone maybe your son is not cut out to learn a whole day and for me where i come from like what you know it's like i i couldn't believe it you and who share the same values as i and we come from the same hasidic you know environment you know you're square or chernobyl but you know this is our this is our uh familiar domain and you know what yeshiva means and you're telling me that maybe uh he's not made to learn all day i remember like i say i i said i can't believe i'm hearing this and and it changed but hashem you went to yeshiva and because it worked out but i'm just saying you have to you have to you have to listen you know and not you know we were raised a certain way we're used to a certain way what's the good what's the community going to say what's going to be later what you do him i mean the whole gamut okay have it up we had a little fabrication we'll see everyone tomorrow sorry take care bye thank you thank you