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Klolei HaChinuch Education Principles Rebbe Raayatz #14
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Habits: What, Where and How to deal w them
Categories:Torah/Chassidus
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so let's start now uh one second
one second here we go okay so
we're in page
59 let's do the kit sir before we go on
to udalif
kisser we learned yesterday asaritivium
10 different
qualities nature kuala lumpur bashiris
five on the wealthy five exist by
wealthy people
vaca misha and five by poor
by people who come from a poor
background etc poverty
and um that's if you know if you haven't
studied it please study it let's go on
you dollars
the third the third condition for the
massage
for the situation that the educators
should
look at if desiring success with his
students
this is a classification
based on habits but we have though
without difference in
whether they be good or bad in other
words we want to focus in now
on a person's habits
sounds pretty uh pretty uh practical for
us
right let's see
habits are one of the strongest nature
natural
phenomenons for
for us
they themselves the habit itself
moisture is very powerful
in its own right and number two look
what he says
bipolar the impact that they have
on on on things outside of one
of a person habits are very powerful in
that way too
right let's look at the words
they're very powerful in their result on
things that are
outside of themselves and it'll explain
behindu
a habit habits are not
innate you weren't born with a habit to
bite your nails
right but it seems like
this is who you are you're biting your
nails you can't stop and you have to do
things right
that's a habit it's not who you are
next mz next page top of page
61 he meet the taqifa
that's aki what's that with us he meet
the taqifa biatsuma
it it's all in its own right it is
very powerful so
the feeling of a habit is like
is like it's natural you understand
although it's not innate
but it becomes so much part of you it
feels like this is who i
am and this is so true and it's a
mistake
but this is the way it is you are not
your habits
you may be identified by habits by
others
but are you your habits no okay
so so why is it that habits
identify you okay
your habits become second nature
meaning it's not really your nature
it becomes your nature but the so
so we have the the two sides of the coin
it's not your nature but it becomes look
at the words kid
teva shaney it's like a second nature
within you
and it feels like as though it's you
know
in addition to it being very powerful
in its own right
it is so powerful that it affects all
aspects of a person
outside of him
whether it be on his body
whether it be on his soul powers
in other words the habits that we
form yoni the habits that we form
are not to be taken lightly yeah on one
end
we want to dismiss it's only my habit
it's not who i
am and that ebba says it's true it's not
who you are
but it becomes so much part of you that
it does have an impact
on you both in your external aspects of
life
and in your inner life so for example
anxiety
do you know again i'm not the
professional but
i i i think it seems to me there's one
aspect of anxiety that's inherent in a
person
they're born with anxiety with a nature
to be anxious
and then there is anxiety that you bring
upon yourself
through stress through real estate
and through many other things right
pierces
what type of anxiety is that moisture is
that natural
no marvin
someone decides he wants a lot of
property
which is great but remember marbadaiga
you're going to have a lot of worries
do i have a tenant do i not have a
tenant is he in is he out is he paying
is he not paying
is the roof leaking and the
it goes on and on and on marvin margaret
digger
so tiger anxiety
there is natural anxiety and we see this
why are some children of ours more
anxious and some are less anxious they
come from the same parents
because there's an element of anxiety
that's that's innate
but then there is an anxiety that's
brought about by habit
so i use the the example of marvin
as an exchange word for habit
meaning you habituated yourself
by buying lots of property so the result
is
what it is yes yaakov
it's a consequence what is the
consequence
and therefore
um that's right and that's what he says
here
i'm not making an extension between then
a consequence
of investing but that's um
uh they're not a habit
i i i said i know it's not a habit
it's not like you have a habit to gamble
or habit to drink or habit to eat
or habit to bite your nails i mean
first of all that could a person it
could be a habit of buying real estate
and just being obsessed
and having a habit to buy and buy and
buy and buy why not
but i was giving a dogma i was just
giving an example
of how to support whatever says here
that a habit has not only not only in
and of itself
is so powerful but its impact is
also to the outside
right it impacts the way your life
is and it impacts the way your spiritual
life is he calls that
a vari and he calls kaikaz
so the way so so i was giving an example
just as
marvin brings about
marber daiger so it's it's not you
you're not real estate
but when you invest yourself in that
area and
you're fully into it and you're marble
remember the wording is
marble then the result is marbadika
so when a person has a certain habit in
whatever
area that may be it's going to make an
impact that's all i was using as an
example
is it clear now kind of okay
very good yes
so i know it came a little late but um
question is this
how is it different when you're talking
about habits
um or having digits
or whatever you know the lushen is then
having a person that that has an it's
his inherent nephesh bahamas
meaning a person has a nephesh bahamas
right yeah
so if my nephesh bahamas likes to go run
after
children by a kiddush which i guess i
like to do right
i'm going to have a very bad habit of uh
you know not being able to put
the plate further for me and jump into
the challenge
that's also a habit it's also bahamas is
it the same thing that's different like
what
um would you call
not being able to control yourself at a
kid a habit i mean would it
is it really habitual i mean
no i i i would think that that is more
of an expression of nephesh obama's
that happened what i'm saying is
habit could be a good habit could be a
an ugly hab but not a healthy habit
never shop the drive in other words
you're right you're right that
some sometimes to discern between
is what's causing me to do whatever i'm
doing is it nothing shabbat
or his habit because nefer shabbam is is
part of who you are
very good point you made yoni and habit
we said here it's not who you are it's
who you become
but he said to he said as well it feels
as
though this is who you are so
you know in other words i'm not going to
say
someone who whether it's your example or
another whether it's the
marvin the host and from pierce office
or the kid that's chong that you speak
about
that's not who the person is
i just want to say i just want to say in
yoni's uh
defense of himself that the kiddush that
he puts out of karl buff
is like a wonder of nature so it's it's
uh
you know it would be hard to resist for
anybody
right no but but in all seriousness he
he's making uh
he he's bringing to the table a good
thing to look at and think about
that drive let's forget about it you
need it could be anybody
that drive to to to indulge and change
is that coming from who you are or what
you're doing
that that is the analysis that we need
to think about
and i would like to argue it's not who
you are
it's a it's a a style and an
approach that you've in a way
been doing for years to call it a habit
that causes those results
but anyway now could there be
any a person who is obsessed with food
yeah
but i don't think that you're obsessed
with food to the point where
if you get up in the mornings like a guy
doesn't who's a smoker
he doesn't have a smoke he he he he's
crazy
he doesn't have a drink he's nuts you
know what i'm saying
um could there be a person like that
yeah yeah and then it's you know it
needs a lot of
refinement so um we have hilo dealing
with these issues probably daily
you know but but
let's go up schneider found him hey pull
the same skills on that
second paragraph page 641 there are two
uh two ways that soul powers operate
allah
influencing at close
quarters meaning
how does logic how does intellect impact
it's called bedarah kirov in a manner of
closeness
what does that mean
logic explains and elaborates
that this should be in this and this
manner
so what is the style that logic that
seiko uses
to accomplish its goal kirouf
why is it kirov i explain it to you i
rationalize it to you
i you know i i i i take time
in developing the idea that's all kirov
being shahoo but whether it be a matter
of
learning beijing whether it be a matter
of practice
the impact of logic
it comes in the form of patience and
sweetness
seiko is not fighting with you you're
here
seiko is sweetening you up
and saying come my dear let me explain
to you what the situation is
that's one type of paola
bayes number two
there's a type of an activity that is
dominion a decree it's gonna
mensholo dominance
willpower is a bulldozer
seiko is not a bulldozer
cycle is a sweet thing russian
is tough
haregilus habit pulasa he believes
that ever classifies and puts habit you
hear avi
into the second category into dominion
and decree
forcefulness but there are gazeto
members
as the saying is shielding alcohol over
habit rules over everything
so if like to use yoda's marshall
you're the habit of eating
you just roll over everyone
you go for the food you don't care how
you look
and how you perceive you gotta have to
get the first
chunk because that's your habit for
years
and the way habit works it doesn't take
and consider into consideration
anything
else whether it be a minor thing that's
relevant
to the to the body in other words let's
say
to your bowels and to your stomach
and to your you know you're gonna flesh
away
you're gonna have issues
or whether it's a serious issue
it makes you ugly inside
you what are you a glutton you're a
behemoth so the heart look at the rabbit
says that you know uh i mean i'm giving
the dogma i'm giving the example but
but the rebels words is when it comes to
a varyagr
think about you see you have to think
about the deeper insight
when it comes to ivaria goofy says he
calls a dover cotton
it's a minor thing the impact um on the
way the the limbs of the body
when it comes to the quickest and
efforts to your soul powers meaning who
you know who you are spiritually it's
never good
so don't think that fleshing away the
truth you know
you know you're perceived as a glutton
that's the big issue
the big outwardly what do people say
about me
the bigger the bigger issue is
what does it say about your spirituality
what does it say about where you're at
where's your heart and mind that's the
issue
that's the dover goggle that really is
important let's continue
basically talking about if it's a spirit
if you're a spiritual fester
not a principal no
no we're saying that the the physical
eating and freshing of the food has two
impacts one on your the limbs of your
body
you know whether you get sick
and you got to go to the bathroom excuse
me and and and and you vomit
and you're tired you know all of those
things
right and you're sluggish that's
and then the same food
tells you and others that your your
spiritual side
needs a lot of work you follow
so it's the same activity it's like him
to my legs
it's just a little bit yeah but but what
i'm saying is that the same
activity the same overeating or
over sleeping or over drinking and over
whatever everything
every indulgence has an impact both in
the
physical avareha golf and in the
spiritual and that ebba says
that the impact on this physical is
considered
minor in comparison to the impact on the
on the spirituality which he calls
goggle great let's continue
now he says
all activity of habit its impact but
derek shlita
is dominion bulldozer
mibli without consideration
imma i i need it i
i need it it's my habit i don't care
what the outside
perceives about me or the situation
habits are like any other
natural tendencies of human beings and
their soul powers
and he goes back to what we learned
yesterday which is when used for good
and beneficial and benefit and benefits
he your family that's very beautiful
over hypocrisy but when used for
low life type of things and things that
are no good
[Music]
it's
if so move in now goes back to our
our
he needs to again organize the approach
perhaps based
on the habits by the each student
you can't just put it all put them all
into one basket
and say they have all bad habits it
you will not have any success in
educating in that way
you have to look at the particular habit
and who has the habit you see because
the habit by one that's no good
is a virtue by the other and the by the
other when it's a virtue
could be by the other one no good
but take your voice with might and
strength
in a specific way colon what is that
the hazak or the fire sergios
to strengthen and beautify escargot
that they'll be cut away the lawyer
mayhem
afghan shemets and they will be
obliterated with no
remaining vestige
no how many machamp can do this how many
people focus in on what the habits are
and who has the habit and when is the
habit and where's the habit coming from
okay okay i said biting the nails
if a person has that habit and a habit
to drink
what happens worse you know you have to
you have to evaluate the situation
and of course what's the root of each
anxiety
stress space psd or pts whatever it's
called
and whatever other conditions right you
got to go back to the sheidish
what's causing the person to to to do
these habits
but one thing's for sure that both
good good habits and bad habits are so
powerful
that when they operate
they're like willpower in the sense they
run you over
and control the situation
and they don't allow logical intellect
in they fight that off
now what is our job hillary what's our
job
our job is to somehow
cool the habit down and get
the in the seijo to be more
cognizant and real in the person's life
and to do that it's a lot of work
yes it seems to me uh it seems to me
from what we've learned that
at the moment that a person actually
enacts a habit
is acting out uh you know a habit
of um that that's coming from the atahra
yeah you know it's a heart whether it's
you know whether it's an actual issue or
not
that at that moment um that he's uh
the the lesson of the tanya would be
that he's a russia at that moment is
that would that be how you would think
about it
at that moment he has fallen into a
russian mindset
yeah i mean you know i think one of the
hardest things for me in learning tanya
is sort of understanding that
you know when we talk about somebody as
being good or evil we tend to talk about
like a character through
their character through time right
across context
right but the tanya seems to talk about
it
as you know what you're doing in the
moment
if you're if you're uh and who's you
know who's ruling the ear kitana at the
moment
excellent that's correct and why and why
is it tanya why does the altitude come
to that
concept because every person
is good there's no such thing as a bad
person this bad behavior
that is the ideology that stands
behind yeah yeah and that you never
never
always realized that yes jonasson yes
yeah the word the word the word like you
right here which means habit comes from
the word radio which means legs
so so so when you walk
when when you want to learn to walk you
have to go step by step
until until you become automatic
right so so so a habit is something that
you do automatically
because you've done it once quite three
times already and you become
automatic correct correct now in order
yes that happens when somebody's walking
in a way that's not good
you have to really learn how to walk
[Music]
so we thought the stakeholders evolved
and but he has to he has to be able to
allow
his cycle to get involved
yeah and if you don't allow your sacral
to get involved it ain't changing let me
just finish the paragraph
next paragraph
now i'm going to talk about good habits
ticking
and this is good habits
says that happens sometimes why should
they also need correction
a habit of eating good foods delicacies
to strengthen your body next page 63.
wisconsin so you can learn to be half
skeeder
in a cavanaugh he
the kavanagh of that habit the intent is
good
ava goofy heads and mcgill is the very
essence of that habit
because you're indulging in food
your intent is good but the actual
performance of the habit
is on more on the on the bad side
in addition to that in addition
he says in addition to the fact that a
human being
is greater than food and drinks
and it's a it's it's it's it's a prison
it's an embarrassment it's it's it's
it's a loneliness from man who is the
seat of
of humanity a man intelligence
to make to be the end all of just one
thing which is eating and drinking
so he says in addition to that he named
he said listen to that how does that
neck dog taylor it's against tater in
other words
it's against humanity because you're not
being immense you're not being the human
and number two it's against trader
because toyota says you shouldn't be
indulging
therefore
to try to solve the situation as much as
possible
the darker shall tell you that it should
be incur
in correspondence i'm sorry in in it it
should fit
the rules of tita so what he adds over
here in this last five six seven eight
nine lines
he's adding that even meters to even
regulus typhus good habits that you're
eating for the purpose of learning
needs refinement so in other words
don't think just because it's a habit
in a good area it doesn't need tickling
it needs tickle and this is a very
important dakuda
especially by people who are learning
and davening and doing the right thing
[Music]
you need to step back and say
the kavana the intent is good
but is the application of the tent the
habit
in its application form is it healthy
and and sometimes the answer is it's not
whether it's this indulgence or that
indulges
okay simply speaking
someone who is a tremendous mitzvahs and
he does everything right
and he learns in dublin's but he has
certain habits that that
that he uses that need refinement that's
what it's all about
will continue tomorrow mr shem have a
great day
everyone zai gazoon nice seeing everyone
take care
bye