Essence of Chasidus #18- Atzmi: Be Real, Don't Pretend - Conforming to Others, Yes or No

so let's start um to yesterday um we learned on page 47 about the essence essence so let's continue that let's let's begin again the chapter seven and go quickly through the through it also for this reason that's why this has been compared to oil rosin there doesn't the secrets of all secrets okay essence are called oven called oil is the essence of everything everything meaning it's in in a in a liquid and compared to others you have oil and other liquids as the oil is the essence this this this forces us to say in in a sense that in itself in its pristine reality it is separate from everything else and the rebel writes in the parenthesis for if you were to argue and say that it will it has a a it has some association to a particular the yokolias that you can't say it is the essence of everything it's already been captured tainted predetermined by a particular style and we spoke about that yesterday lent we'll just go on now hello and this word is this this is khabad lingo and it's in its best when you say someone is an ox me right i wrote a book la bobbitt speak i got to get you guys some copies you have to you have to memorize this book if you you want to if you if you want if you want to know the lingo of of real chabad not talking about the you know superficial khabar they're talking about from the kishkis from the schmaltz the way it was for 200 years especially since the babajis you've opened 1897 and the babbage there are certain buzzwords that have a certain connotation and when you hear that buzz word you say i got i i know what he's talking about so there's the word atsumi now the word other means essence right but in it it has a very different different significance actually means the core essence in its pristine state that remains that way throughout so in other words you need you could be shopping at the uh whatever that market's called the big market nurses roll rami levy levy or you can be walking in a beautiful park where you could be with your kids or shoppers at the show you when someone sees you he sees us me the the the the surroundings of rome and the environment are all very nice but it's not etsy it becomes that's them if you're excellent and if you're not ask me you could be in the ila at sorry and if you're not ask me then the experience is not asking me listen hallelujah we would have a knoxville experience once a year that's me it's not a it's not it it's not it doesn't come you know through uh we as we said it's it's it's a lot of work to be real okay how about in english if we use the word colloquial words to be real to really be real wherever you are and not to and not to and not to um put on a facade and just the other day i was listening to some popular speakers for a moment someone sent me clips and and and you know what can i tell you that there's there's a sellout it's like you want to uh entertain a certain segment of the population so you you use words and concepts and ideas and it's it's really watering down in other words what has to come through is the other me if the me is ask me no problem use those words on you but the ask me is to come through yes yes sir i was going to say that um i use and i have used for many years this uh concept and title of being real and i have to say that when i apply that term there are very very few people i know who are real and it's like such a title of honor in my own eyes that when i feel i can tell somebody that they are real because they are who they are and it doesn't matter where they are or who they are around it is they're not trying to be somebody else they're not trying to impress anybody they're not trying to it is they are like just real who they are a hundred percent of the time 100 of the places and it's so rare to find those people okay but it's something to work towards and and why you know like find those people first let's find it in ourselves it's always easy to find into someone else i don't know i think we should put more emphasis on finding ourselves i'll give you an example just maisha always wants concrete examples and he's right when i when i would come into the bureau khan's house and you you have to understand what type of person this is this is a gift that god gives once in a lifetime to the world and i'm not saying it because he was my mashbian he was a laboratory i'm really you know anyone that knew him and and hundreds of thousands of people knew him would say the same thing they would say the same thing everyone with their own nuance their own right but that that's not that's not his that's not the specialty god gifted him god gifted hashem gifted this person with a certain cup and a certain heart but to see the genuine i know there's such a word in english genuinity his genuineness his his sincerity asked me or to be real that was fresh so for example and i ate for him many times many times and i saw all kinds of things right it's all in this book all the secrets what i saw i put it out there it's all in here my 25 years or so or longer from 1975 [Music] till look more anyway 45 years so i can come into his house and he's laying on the couch and and he's laying on the couch because he's tired now could could you imagine uh coming into robert shapiro's house and he's laying on the couch i i don't think you could imagine it might am i right or wrong no no he he's laying on the couch but he's laying on a couch with you standing there could you see that um no i i came to the house i've been in the house many times once i never saw him like lying on the couch when i was when i was in in the house but he was like you know like obviously it was relaxed okay maybe not quite right anyway what i'm saying is he was a person who you know it's like if you came to this house and you saw him like on a couch he said run the other way out of respect it's like you know why am i in this private space but he didn't care he really didn't care and in fact if in fact one second was it and in fact if you ran away because of that he criticized you like who am i for you this is so not godly in his it's so not god now you know and some will argue america you know if you're a king you know you have to see the king in in in in in in his beautiful state malach of texas you know become is ill um you know the you know show them to the public and there's always a controversy how much do you show how much don't you show because it's not respectable so there is there is that concept but this was the specialty of this man he was so real that he hated that who is he i'm telling you he hated it give me another example boro park this year there's a hundred people in the room monster shabbos it's winter it's it's early right he comes to give a tanya shear as he comes in everyone rises and and he would just walk and say if he was able to talk and wanted to talk he would say stop with your stupidity another example something happened i don't go know the details and i felt that he had a um a copeda on me that he had a stern eye and i and i was and i wasn't feeling well i got scared so i called him up so he said to me stop with the silliness if you hug the phone up it's like who might i have a competitor on you or anyone it's like who am i so that's a very refreshing to be around such a person you know to be around such a person and i'm not here to say that i should have not you know used rebecca shapiro as an example casual show love he's a very special person just saying average mo all most people you know they they in a certain way they they present themselves a certain way and and there's a terror guidance to that but then you come across this is for me is there being real and and that's why such a person people flock to hit such a person because you don't see this you don't see a person who is so vocal himself he doesn't he doesn't even realize how bavarco himself is because it's not by him being vocal himself he didn't put himself now into a box called i'm going to be mavato myself i'm going to humble myself because that that person is the epitome of guyver it's like you know we laugh at it says on the on the um summit and others say oh khan it is now time to cry ladies and gentlemen we are going to cry now can't start off clear caught now we got to dance you know you got the transliteration of khabar in the art school sudoram now i'm going to give you instructions stand up dance bow down and cry move to the right you come like you know you know anyway my now it's your turn i was just i don't know it's it's a minor point many years ago um we're just speaking about this right before you came on something related but yeah uh well we live when we lived in arnold so we dive into the boston shoal yeah i've been there i've been a great show yeah yeah and um so the rub at the time it was at the time the sun one of the sons of the rabbit of mayor horowitz so he invited us to their home for shabbos suda and it was the daytime suitor and uh we came and i don't remember i don't know there might have been a very small crowd beside yourself very very small who came in was just our our oldest son at the time was with us um he was uh under he was three four anyway the mayor stretched out on the couch very comfortable took her on took our son apparently threw him up in the air a little bit was playing with him in a very nice it just felt like very very um normal healthy way right and and and how did you feel when you saw that it was refreshing it was real it was really it was real yeah it was real yeah very real yeah very real you know and and we just have to realize that you know it is was saying you know what i find and it's so hard to find because why why is why is it that way is it because we're bad is it because we're we're ugly we're mean we're disruptive no i think that i i think that we are worried we are worried about what how we are going to be perceived correct correct correct and that's the idea of being the knox me that's the idea that that to live a life to work to being an arts meet you know to be monotony you know i i told you this but i'll repeat it because it brings out the nakuda that happened his room wore a short sleeve shirt like this he always wore a short sleeve white shirt when he came out for milkha right he put on his hat he put on his kapota put on his gargle and he came out the dog so i was told that when he went back in it's like he flipped off his he's got but he threw his hat down and he went right to the desk and the gemara whatever he was doing you know but the there is you know when you come out to the public you should be you know you're a rug you're a rebel you're exotic you know you're a governor whatever you know there is a but the question is so so reminded was in in in antwerp and he looked the same way he was dressed with a short jacket he didn't wear kapota during the week you know the russians see them didn't do that it was it's only a thing the rebels said in the early 50s at some point but the rational barbecue said them during the week wore a short jacket okay so so he was dressed with a short jacket and he didn't look exactly put together okay you know his bread was very unkempt you know and and and and maybe his shirt was i i i don't know so so the rabbi who who who brought him to speak and to vision it's a question he was giving a shear in abbas israel the safer but in the vision of cerebral safer and there was a big crowd so the rabbi pleaded with him please kind of tuck himself in and he said you know they don't they don't understand it's like i told you the other day about me giving the the rav the kiss at simcoe store and he didn't get it then he said to me they don't get it well this cabadra of cetera they don't relate to someone like you who they have the greatest respect for and they know that's what i came to learn from you and hear your share that you look disheveled you know and and he pleaded with him and and and he cooperated he he you know but i'm just saying why did he do that because he he's not he's not a man no he's elsewhere he's elsewhere so so you know on one end you could say oh what kind of pet mensch are you or you could see that this is an ask me and to ask me in at certain times you know another example of how the same ox meat well i'm telling you stories personally happened i drove him to muncie to uh at that time i was involved with the issue of muncie and i arranged for um rabbanam to come it was a a nice event and respectful event a certain abundance and and so i drove him from from crown heights so he came into the car first with his with his jacket you know and then he says wait a minute and he goes back into his house and he puts on his cap he's coming to a near to an event where they're upon him and it's a certain type of event you know here in the middle of the week no one's in crown heights hitting away no kapata during the week right he's coming to muncie it's not the lebanese world it's a different oil and they have different expectations and you know that you want you wanted to be more successful for lachey machem he put on his couple he didn't tell me this i'm just telling you the probably changed i'm surmising what the reason is you know what i'm saying you're telling me oh i'm changing now because it wasn't that that okay then i couldn't let's go back to the text 20 seconds um i'm sorry i i i didn't finish the line leos asked me the leos asked me right an ask me is found in everything look at uh note 64. he quotes here on page 47 from terror the essence is apart from all particular aspects manifestations or qualities derived from it and yet it it is the foundation and central point of everything quote essence refers to the absolute fundamental non-derivative state of any being the state which transcends revelation it is non-composite manifestation does not involve the essence of being the essence of the the essence being the s is being the source of the manifestation it's a source but it's not it's not grabbed by the manifestation it controls its own destiny it's not controlled by anything else let's go back to the text last line i want to welcome i see david knoll david dole a good old friend from way back from los angeles we met for the first time david um i hope you're well and and only continue distributing the hyenas gham top of 1949 ms bhattacham benigal the tater and this is an important dakota this idea reflects itself also in the revealed part of tata this says this is my a standard uh approach of the reverend and i say that ever even in comparison to the first six remembers you don't find in the writings of the first six laboratories bringing proof to what they say in qasidis from nigler you don't find that if you explore their writings you will find it who took the time to explore it and who took the time to teach us that that's what should be done this last hour and then and it's an amazing thing i just wrote about this the other day it's an amazing thing that he did and he understood the mindset of post-holocaust generation he saw that the post-holocaust generation the european idea do it valazoic state do it because this is the way it is and freight this concoctions ask no questions like joni and i grew up in yeshiva with those type of teachers right that ever saw that this will not work in america and as much as they could sought to change this in in the world of education so so too with bringing proof to siddhis and kabbalah from nigella right it's not just to answer the lit or the snagit who you know hey like i told you the whole thing with cheshire no support in the ninth early forties the frida kareba and the criticism we got from rabban and taking uh uh mahalo and pierce and saying a hasidic heal a caveat comes to the word akef how well comes the word hilo prays akasiy shaheel praises god come on are you for real and he got the letters came in the rebel once said about other another matter he says the post office got rich from the amount of letters coming with the stamps the cost of stamps and the letters came into the to the editorial department after you make such an interpretation what did they have to do is sir he found sources in to support his free his father-in-law's hasidic teachings such as academia mahalo and other such things and he did that throughout the 1940s because that was a crucial time when the attacks were coming on the fleet of canada in this issue from various communities and remember that's why he put these lengthy footnotes into the memoriam of the previous rebbe and this was this was a main part of his work during the 40s was to footnote well based on all aspects of tightening particularly nigla the torah to support the hasidic mymorim and insights that the previous rabbi and previously babachirabas gave here too in this country that they're he said and he wrote and you see clearly he says this idea of an athlete being behold and that concept is not just a concept in hasidis it's found also in negligent torah so he wants he wants the human mind the the the the torah mind the talmud mind to understand this as well and that's why a person like rabbi sullivan joshua barcelovic went crazy over this country's crazy he just never saw such a thing why because here that ever took the these deep concepts of siddhis and shows that also nicolas as we'll see later on which he and such people can relate to very much although rabbi sullivan knew well citizen and all that but you know that wasn't his you know and here comes the woman that everyone writes such a contest with such deep ideas and asks me and now he's going to prove the further consequ and the rabbit says that not only will we prove the idea of oxme in the revealed part of toyota the niggler but the poem is we're going to soon see an example a halal example that denotes the concept of atsumi from one on one hand hashem and a name and this is it here is here's the example hashem oil doesn't mix with any other liquids practically like jameson told us the other day on the other hand it penetrates into everything so yay this idea it doesn't mix yet it penetrates as an example of being an oxme in your own in your own right in your own world and retaining that asks me status where you're in a way different but yet you're in everything you're different but in everything should i say a uh should i say something came to mind now that's a little a little tough you want to hear something tough you can handle it mice are not smee here he is a habapnic with such a beard in edge clay now i'm saying i'll give you an example that's the point an oxmi can be anywhere it because he's an oxman he could be behold davar and when you're not an argument you can't be beholder so from many people you know they wouldn't be able to do you know you know what i'm saying i have my men hug him i have my type of rabbis ask me be who you are and and it's fresh and it and if you really announce me behold over let me just finish the last paragraph taylor success and that is why the terrorists of hasidis the teachings of siddhis has been compared to oil gamba because for also in hasidis state who not elo there are these two dimensions teachings is such a teaching that is the essence of life force which is beyond expansion life force it's the core of life force so therefore the core of life force is not comprised of anything to make it life force it's the creator of life for us not the created from life force leader and simultaneously at the on the other hand ms paschettes he casidis extends itself um and it permeates every single type of things canal has explained above like we explained earlier so this is a very beautiful conclusion to this paragraph that the limousines the tyrosaxidus i'm sorry the traitors are seated from the monsanto so i'm going to ask you this see this on one hand it's like different and on the same time it has an impact on everything so that's why my ship see this is able to illuminate a jew who is very far and the jew is very close and that's why it's a mistake to think that the bashantha just came for the amaratsu yoni you know what we grew up hearing is the bashantiv came for the simple folk they were depressed they were devastated hashem came just to revive them wrong he definitely did that as well but he came to revive even the talmud even the great rov even the great about kabbalah everyone should be revived and renewed whoever they are that's what the placement came to do that's what the basham temple so therefore siddhis is a teaching that shaykh lakol hasidis does not have any trappings as people sometimes want to make it in my hasidus you're a lit fat you're swardic those are all those are all definitions that are created and made up the core essence of siddhis is shaykh yes just tell me um so guess so using whether you're using your example that you just used with moisture which is a fantastic the fantastic example i i i just thought about it now it's not just a very good example how would you how would you put it in in in in a way where today people are are trying to conform meaning they're losing that essence they're they're putting the the ominous on the on the levush on the hat on the you know what i'm saying rather than you know just be who you are like go to school be who you are you don't have to look like lubavitcher you don't have to like a spartasha you don't have to look like a hosted you know like i know like every time i go to uman like that that's what's such a beautiful part about it like everybody's themselves there's every shade every shaven okay so so so i i think i don't know if you know because of a place like uman as an example or the ohio order someone uh my son is here in town so he told me the rabbi rabbi and carl springs said he was 12 1 o'clock at the oil he flew in from from florida late and he sees sophmore there and he goes over to him you know he's not involved in this world you know he's he's teaching kids in the hebrew academy in florida right and he says but but you know but we you know we grew up together he comes from real chabad he says what are you doing here like you know i for me this is you know i i know what they're doing there but for him it was like what are you doing here because he's still living in the 70s with that when the baba just thought we're killing each other you know what i'm saying so he's like what are you doing here he's like and they said sadiq we go we go to kibritza so i think yeah i think i could say i know that there's been a kind of moving away from conformity the problem is that the old guard and there's plenty of that left has hasn't moved away or the rigidity of of you know of certain leadership in lakewood and yerushalayim you know to get them to move away from from a certain model is is still not there and the proof is and i told you this several years ago uh huda refnets you know who's a great philanthropist and he supports mir and many institutions so about four or five years ago i remember we spoke about it he he got he was very you know he gets calls from mothers their their daughters their kids are out of yeshiva and he couldn't take it his heart was ripped open so he decided to write a letter and he wrote the scathing letter oh no no sorry so he wasn't what he could and of course they're going to honor him and you have to see this i think they took it off already that the internet all the russia shiva all their abundance all the durham whatever are all sitting there and references at the podium and he spoke for like 45 minutes and he reeled it into them he really did and he said this is not acceptable and all that so i remember myself and many others we were saying great wow and that's me a man who stands up to the establishment a week later they took off the post and he wrote a tr a retraction why it's obvious why because they told them if you don't we're sorry money here money there and we need your money boy but we're not going to change we have a system you don't understand the system and one second listen you don't live here so don't come in here and tell us you know you want to open another 10 schools you got money open 10 schools it's america it's free free free free country but don't tell so in that sense yoni there still is conformity but i think that the ahmedabad the regular people are are really are really going away from that and they are coming to new mom to an alternative shimon beard not be a fruit not from colored shirt not color shirt you know the the issue is to change the school the yeshiva system the girls school system and there's a lot of work needs to be done that because of the old guard i think we could also say and i see it in our communities here and i'm sorry i'm sure it's in the air this world too and but chemist as well that there's now a new younger generation who are becoming the merchants and i think there we have a lot more room to make changes with the old guards with these white beards you ain't getting too far it's a go ahead um i'm gonna say i'm not sure that i agree 100 with that it's a problem the old guard and and i've heard from many people not necessarily in my generation but younger who say they want to be part of a community they need to be part of a community and in order to be part of that community and be accepted into that community it's a package deal and i've heard that those words a package deal i've heard from separate people separate occasions and in different communities i had a a key roof person a speaker who um stayed with me and he he came up on a sunday morning from my basement in the guest room and he was wearing a gargoyle and i said you wear garfield during the week he said if i want to be part of team bells i have to wear the team bell's uniform it's a package deal and that's you know that's the pressure that is the pressure so so what what do you disagree with i don't i don't hear that well that it's an old that it's the old guard these are young people this is this is a young generation these are and and they are willing they are willing to sacrifice some of the otzmi in order to be part of a community okay and and they they and they find value in being part of that they want and they need to be accepted in a community and that has some requirements yes that yes they're willing to sacrifice okay okay and i and i understand and respect that but some but you also would you wouldn't you say that you know that there's a oh there is a a a there's a group of people and you know that are rebelling and rejecting that a 100 percent i'm not defending it i'm explaining it right okay yeah so no i was just i was just you know in his comment you know the conformity so i i you know right right exactly and then the the the gartle during the week is a perfect example of that i mean here he was admitting to me in as much as no he didn't feel like he was getting some spiritual energy from putting on a garthel and wearing a garcon the week i wear a garthel when i dive in because that's for me that's that's a garment that's specific for the happening but here he was saying this is the uniform and this is the this okay and we have a concept of development you want minigun machine the gemara talks about doing certain things because this is the mini gamoka and clearly the mother is saying that implying that even if you don't feel that way this is the minigame okay what right do you have to come into the diminuti to the place that has a certain way and and disturb it so garco you could either put it on put it you know but and and i and i've gone through this and and i respect them with when i was dropping the square here they wanted me to say the color of kate's mashiki i didn't want to say so i never went to the yamad and i was the one this laboratory was the one that when someone went over to the other they needed to say kate i was the one who opened my mouth from the back of it all the way sitting in the back and i was saying cut of cakes i would scream out case and they all looked at me they plots they let you know here the laboratory doesn't say gates is is kind of demanding what and i said to them it's me they got monkey so i choose not to go to the yemen you know and that that's right but dominican welcome is to say kate's well you know okay we'll see everyone tomorrow have a great day shalom bye-bye thank you