Essence of Chasidus #17- Where is your Will power? Don't Divorce it's your Tikun

so page 47 in the countries on the essence of siddhis this i believe is the uh 15th or 16th year so everything is online to to review if you're able to okay so we're learning now that sidness is called the the shaman shaman oil the secrets of the secrets there is the secret of torah which is the idea of right the idea of a kabbalah of yahya wine and then there's the secret of secrets and in the second paragraph on page 47 chapter six was a chapter seven the zion is uh that's what we're holding sherman who could decide this let's read this sherman who nicodemus shemin is the essence the kudasamsies have the translator here um the essence the essence essence of everything yeah but the kuda means the point you know the time says literally thompson's means a summary that's what the word thompson's means you have an elaborate idea and then you have the thompsons of the idea the summary of the idea so in the edition the in the parentheses in the text it says essence which is the essence shall call dover so shaman oil is the essence so that so essence is a yiddish word um i i guess so or is yeah well there's an english word and there's a yiddish word essence if it comes from the german language and all that that we had that you know asked we need to ask linguistic but yes yes there is a word yiddish essence and you see it here in the parenthesis oh really dolphin you see that some people who don't use tea bags on shop who don't use tea bags on shabbos they prepare what's called t essence and it's a concentrated it's it's a you know small amount of liquid that's very very concentrated right so that's why it's called essence i'm not i'm not sure that is the actual name of such a product called essence or that's a name that's been a figure of speech yeah it's it's not a product it's something that we're writing somehow i don't know how it got the name of essence but the point is that it's it's this very very highly concentrated liquid that you take a little bit and you pour it into your cli yeah the point is that it's it's it's a very concentrated small amount but very very concentrated okay i'm bringing it i'm wondering is there any correlation between that idea well yeah this there is because the essence of t is communicating that little amount that that was that was the way i always understood the word was like when you the the essence is distilled down or something yeah okay fine uh fine yeah no contradiction to what i said earlier i don't think uh uh hey sir what was that you were flashing on the screen okay so so according to my uh hebrew english dictionary thompson is essence and the hardu english yiddish yiddish english dictionary does not have an entry for essence in yiddish okay thank you for that here on one hand this essence is separate is moved down from everything and anything why in the parenthesis key beam for if you were to argue and say that it has some association to some specific thing then this essence couldn't be the essence of cold over if you are already tainted some way or moved predetermined then you have already a liking for a specific particular issue an item so how could you be the essence of everything you're not the essence of everything you're the essence of this particular thing and it happens to be that outwardly you gravitate towards other things but there but there's only a certain thing that really touches you talks to you and this is a very important lagoon we flippantly throw around oh this is my essence and this is the essence the the ebony the barometer to test to know whether indeed this is your essence is if it tickles your fancy if it touches you if if you know when you cut when you confront whatever that particular issue is if that kind of gets you moving and then thinking and then feeling more than anything else so that epic says here if we talk about a pure essence we're talking about something that's removed from cold overprotein you you cannot tell me that i have a particular issue that touches me and i'm still able to experience essence and other things no essence essence is beyond the detail and if so it's not that the detail is bad it's not that it's bad but you need to know where it's coming from and this is why it's such a difficult avoider and it takes years of discipline to discern whether this particular thing is really your essence and this was the life-long avoidable of the hashem makes no difference everyone in their own way sought to find within themselves in our vedas hashem what is their essence because it's it's it's easy to it's easy to um to be caught by chinese by superficiality even good superficiality and convince yourself this is your essence and it's not so there's another term for the success willpower where is one's essence determined not by their mind and not by their heart intellect and emotions as powerful and as important as they are being part of the faculties of the summer are only what we call kaijus they're specific individualized formed faculties and one does not know necessarily from them that that's what they are however when it comes to russian and will and pleasure that's where you could tell with a person's with a person's act and this is why and this is why one second please click concentrate for vote this is why a person has a real deep will and willpower and a person can can for years be engaged in a certain activity in a certain mindset in a certain heartfelt approach and he still is not keying in on who he is only when the rothsain and the taino is experienced that's when that's when one is experiencing essence and to experience will and pleasure it's not from eating you know a steak or or or swimming in the beach when it's 90 degrees outside that's very nice but unless it becomes we're going to use a word now your lifestyle and i don't mean lifestyle outwardly superficially but it becomes like an addiction okay we talk about an addiction the addictive personality in a way in a way is demonstrative of the russian personality the problem is when the addiction takes you to in unhealthy things you're majorly messed up and we have a major issue comes a long cities comes with the balcony that says what's the rating of the yid the eruption of every year is to be with hashem that's in the dna of a jew now reveal that will explore it expand it and when you get to that everything else falls aside it's like right he smoked most of his life a few years after the rabbi's yard said gimmel thomas he wasn't feeling well and he didn't want to smoke and he had a and then he had a heart attack that night the next day he stopped smoking cold overnight and he was like and it was a chain smoker but he was smoking for from when he was a teenager the 1940s you think about it or there's still in there too there they have the story when the devil was used to smoke witness youth in russia and uh and the 1940s when the surgeon general came out that it's dangerous and it's unhealthy and it causes illness etc death and all that so the frida kedabra mentioned it to the labor and he stopped smoking overnight that's that's that's what i heard i didn't see it i wasn't there but i saw it by khan we saw it it wasn't not uh you know and i'm sure you've seen people in other words here is a person who's a smoker and i know hillary does a lot of work with smoking patients and all that here's a person who's smoking all his life and and how does he go cold turkey now again i'm not i'm not the the professional to give you those arguments or those positions but from what i see it one second he'll it has to do with the rocks in the other and when you come in touch with the russian adam the russian is stronger than anything else and overnight you can be a changed person being smoking being in this being in that and it's like you know what it's like you're a fresh new baby you're not someone who's 60 and 70 who dropped smoking after 40 50 years at this moment when you go through the russian experience you are a new person and the same is true with shiva what what what means does the paradigm shift you know longer high in yankovic you're not that person anymore but you wear that one yesterday that was yesterday yesterday i was living without ruxin now i'm living with willpower if i live with willpower i'm a new person okay my shin then hillow unless you want to say something no moisha you forgot i was gonna no no no i didn't forget i'm not sure how relevant it is now but i'll ask it anyway when you were giving an example about the tiny egg about sort of where's the person at yeah he's curious for an example some examples i don't know i don't know if it's maybe it's trying to it's trying to just it should look lifestyle okay i i know uh um the barbiture who he was ashley he was before that it was a yeshiva group in crown heights in the 1950s and he's learned came from a city home he had to raise funds for his institution and you know then uh his spouse passed away it was left with many children it was very difficult and he taught some people in the community i said this which who i knew so one of them told me that when he taught the hasidis to them it wasn't the same person it wasn't the same person who raised money it wasn't the same person who lost his wife it wasn't the same person who uh you know was a good speaker but when he learned when he taught them and they saw that he was he was different so they asked him so he asked him like he says he said like what's this about so he said listen my love my rudson where i'm at is citizen teaching that that that that that's who i am everything else is not who i am so when i'm given that half hour or that hour to teach this to someone else and to share it to he says that's that's me that's an example that's an example the example does that's a concrete example of someone although the rest of the day you see the person in different forms and different involvement that's not the person that's not the schmuck of the person you don't find that the the person is not experiencing the light you schmack thai nuke rats and everything else it's in that little half an hour that you know that he or whatever when he learns what if you haven't that that's who he is and and and and it is this way it is this way um i i know so many so many habits that you know that are here their business whatever one day when they when they get to to fabray with with a few of their own his their own friends and they say look i mean you could see that they're that's where they're at everything else they're good rabbis and good scholars and good fundraisers and good businessmen but that's all because that's what they need to do both financially materially and spiritually but who is the person who the essence we're talking about the essence who is the person not that that's not the essence and um if you if you pay attention to this you you will see it you'll see it around you and you'll see it in yourself yes hello so you're you're talking about uh addiction and rats on yeah and i wanted to just share a little anecdote because once um i gave a smoking cessation group uh to a group of nuns former nuns uh meaning uh they were still nuns but they had been in a convent and they were now living independently um and uh and it was in baltimore and this a big snowstorm was approaching right so you know for a day or so there was you there was uh sort of uh panic buying everybody was stocking up and i said so but i said so i come into the group and i say um uh so how many of you think you'll go out in in the snowstorm and everybody said no way you know i'm hunkering dad i'm going home i said and what would happen if you discovered that you were out of cigarettes how many of you would go out and every hand went up that's right that's exactly right very good so they're there what's that what's the phrase in the michelin pikianas yeah okay there are things that make you happy i would think why should when you are drawing and you're by yourself and no there's no phones and there's no kids and those wives and people and you're and you have like a schmuck you know that's the you feel you feel something different it doesn't it's it's not you know and i know it's i know it's from writing i know from writing it could be days and weeks i write and write i write and research and write and write and i still it doesn't and then there could be a day or an hour that i write something and it really you know it's it's that it's that moment it's that moment and our hope is that when we learn today to do mitzvahs help another eat you know today what does it say today is sin we should have schmack they put it on the on the tombstone because he he was a yid who had pleasure and doing a favor and favor for another jew and i and we saw it and this wasn't in i'll give you an example who goes out to every single show rain snow shine very few people heart he he would when he was well there wasn't a shoulder that he didn't go to there was nothing didn't even exist in his lexicon why he didn't know the person why because a year it's having a symbol no that's what it says in today's game to to have a geshmach in in in in in in in participating in another yid simcha without any strings attached most of us right most of us when do we participate when we know the person when we need something from the person right when i'm we're going to be honored right how many are abundant how many rabbits said i'm not going to be descriptive because i think it will come to your simcha if they don't if they're in the community they don't know if you feel very few i'm just saying that there is doing favors for people and people do favors that we all do that doesn't mean yet we have a smack in it like the schmuck is a whole different level it's like you know spiritual hedonism i mean it sounds terrible but you know the the the pleasuring the pleasuring of god in in amidst him you know what i'm saying it's it's not just because i need to do this it's important to do this no i do it because this is who i am and that explains as siddha says you all remember we learned many times but avraham avino why didn't vino stand outside and the third day after his mila the hardest time the most pain looking for i even shot him looking for for guests to bring him in and what's the answer because avraham was the embodiment of this word it says in the matrix right about the created the world and the young british you're the replacement for abram what has it what does that mean that means that means that you can't rest you cannot rest if you're not doing present i've run couldn't rest guess what avrom had more pain from not having a guest than from the cut that was made on his mila and it was hurting him and there were no painkillers in those days okay go let's go further in it the moderates are rabbit help the rabbit what i'm telling you now that ever said once the secrets printed already i forgot the first name one of the the great side of the mushroom said ever and europe needed an operation i think a brain surgery very serious operation he told the doctor don't don't ask me to explain because i can't i could just repeat he told the doctor do not give me anesthesia says i'm going to compose a negan or single he was a great composer and i will i will that will get me through not to feel the pain and that's what he did he had operation it was successful without anesthesia and he went into what fakers of beginner i don't understand this i don't relate to it i i have an appreciation for for the gina and all that but this level i go to the dentist i'm jumping out of my seat if i you know i need to have shots to the right on the left my wife's not that way but i am that way can you imagine a person but that's my that's that's what we're talking about the russian nagina by the murdered sir rabbit was all of the majid said but that that that and i'm sure hilo can explain it it triggered in the brain that the brain it didn't feel the pain that's what it's like and the same is with obvious soul you know there are two people right you come into a shoe there's one person that sees someone doing something not right in the shoe then there's another person who doesn't see it because he only sees the good it's a different level there is someone who sees it and keeps his mouth shut or says you know he'll do trouba i'll learn with him i'll talk to him the rabbi will and then you know i will placate the situation there's someone else who doesn't see the bed on another year that's a different level what do i need and i don't need a different level like he's you know he's from mars or is it sadly no they're talking about the person that sensitizes when we find himself or is born that way but to to to not see the bed in another person i don't know for me this is the heart the hardest avoider i you know it's such a hard avoidable not to not to see something wrong in our self in others and ourselves too now in ourselves if we don't see the problems that's the biggest problem you understand what we need to say is when when something doesn't go your way and you're very disappointed and you're very upset and i just i woke up with this thought like this morning i woke up with this thought i forget i was like must have dreamt about it but it was something about like ma [Music] those are the words that i woke up with this morning this is tight and this is its reward what we say in the killers and you'll kipper at kneeler and so there is the question this is torah this is its reward i do good i do what you would god what you want and i get kicked around right then there's someone who doesn't have that question even though he is the recipient of such a ma but he but he's beyond it he's be above it and and and and and that's that's the the essence of torah definitely the essence of muslim and i said this is that this whole idea love hain yes and no is the same no difference and when we say no that's what we're really saying but do we do we believe it do we feel it so when you're mangled nebuch lost his daughter in 1963 in a car accident and here is a man who sat nine years in jail and hard labor for helping other jews get out of russia right and he said he paid his dues big time and then his daughter gets killed in a car accident leaving eight nine assignment right i mean so they say on the way on the way to the to the to the to the kura the burial someone said and he said to someone that shame is a shiver he was citing the gomorrah brokers kishen so the word kishan just as he said that shame is a difficult one that's a real man that's a real man who who realizes he's not there yet he's not ashamed to feel an experience he's not there yet is he angry at god no he's not angry at god is he giving up no he's not giving up but he he's he the shame is a shiver then there's a level which is really the level of sadiq but again you could a person can come to it where [Music] you know you know god forbid you know a tragedy says you know this morning to shiva there's a period but the nakuda is what's going on with the rocks and you know with the lots of other and you know it's coming up the gimotham was just the same idea that was your site you know for the hustle for the real husset i don't care that bob it's not about the or the real year that the re the yitu really wants to have a relationship with this particular target and the same is true for every yard sight when a your site comes you have to look at your rushing to god vis-a-vis and and that's where you you you filter down how you what you do so it's not about you know um it's not just about doing making another resolution which is important and giving more sadaka and learning machine eyes for the summer and and and lighting that candle and getting an aliyah this coming shabbos which are all men hug him and i hope all of you will do this shabbos to learn mishnays that have his name in hebrew english take a mission of each letter if you can't learn the whole thing to light a candle before shabbos to be getting a leah ask the gabba if you know the baby just shows you they have multiple names trying to get nalia and that so those are all important things but then there's and i make a fabregan and then talk about that these are things that are important not just with yourself with your family and friends but but it's the rocks yeah and there and that's uh that's a very personal type of uh idea yes yes uh you you're uh uh reminded me uh and shabbos i was learning in the kumarani's parish on pierce and he brought the famous uh story of the balshem who saw somebody being mahalo shabbos and the he brings the teaching he emphasizes the teaching that if you see something like if you see something in someone else it's a message from jermaine that that you have a flaw for gum in this area so he searched and searched what was it that that he might have done and he came to the conclusion that that uh that luzor makes a connection between a uh uh table and shabbos and that he had been he had had not properly given cover to the talmud to the tamil uh right that was it but but that but it seems to me like that attitude of that sort of fundamental uh introspection that anything that i see is a message from shamayim um and it's it's speaking to me about what i need to what i need to do right and in yiddish the word that's used uh is a spigo it's a mirror a spigot a mirror let me just continue i was gonna i was gonna say a place where that that where that's particularly meaningful for me um is in marriage because uh marriage is an easy area to to uh to feel entitled you know to feel like i'm you know i'm not getting what i'm supposed to get or what uh or whatever and to have resentments and so on but to understand under to have that attitude that everything that that comes to me is a message to me the shamayim that's also a great way it seems to me to to bring that that tashpa into into our marriages so with that with that verdict i'll end with a with a story of the altered but you just reminded me of and i need you to use now expanded consciousness to hear the story so don't get bogged down don't get back down in the narrow mindedness of the story okay otherwise i'm not going to tell you the story so someone comes to the palatania the altar and he says i can't anymore i need out i've been suffering all my years with this lady my wife give me grant me a get the alternative says my dear husset no go back and try to make it work sounds like a rabbi right and he goes back he tries to make it work three four months later the cousin comes back and he says redden it's torture it's torture on earth i just want out i don't want her money i don't want any i just want help to let me live i'll do that at this point so he had no breaker so let me tell you something i heard this one rabbi mangels a los angeles of crown heights not mindel rabbi mangel the holocaust survivor you know with the numbers and the talmud and he translated part of tanya into english anyway so he said like this she said that although said to him my dear hosted since you're pressuring me and you're nudging me to grant you the get that you you have a right to go and seek to get and get divorced i'm going to tell you something about your neshama tell me about my man he says you know in the time of the first base amigdas the yiddin had a taiva what was their tie by the time not money not women not drinks not honor their tithe was avoided zoro idolatry yeah it sounds crazy right but they had a title they were obsessed infatuated with bowing down and worshipping an idol what a taivor says the altar you're is a reincarnation for someone from that time of the first base amigos you're obligated to die each time and in the book of the hajj venus every time you bow down three four five six times a day six times misa it says each time that your wife nudges you and drives you crazy and takes away it's me talking one of the times of a play deserter so you want to still get married he's still divorced and he says no that if so i'm staying put i believe that this story has a larger a much greater insight than than you know the technicality of the story each time one second is each time your wife your husband whoever the spouse drives you nuts and all that like hillary said look at yourself take it in and know that it you know by the literature you would say i'm getting more scar i'm getting more reward if i hasid them we don't think that way you know i'm getting a bigger piece of uh comes you know bigger a bigger a bigger piece of uh meat and potatoes and and steak where you know but by the way by the casing they have fear you know appreciation i'll be more with my rabbit i'll be more with hasidim each time you you experience something that is difficult and hard whether it's collectively communally and or personally know that you you need it yes yes sir as i was going to say it reminds me of the story of the the yid hakaya she had a second wife named shingle yeah and uh shane shingle was a very a difficult woman yeah he used to like pour soup on the guest and would come and interrupt the shiram and yell at people and then the city told you give her a gift you know what it's enough already you don't need to put up with this and he said i'll tell you a story there was once a man who went to bed so myla after 120 years and they said you know you didn't have guests you didn't learn torah you didn't do what what's what's your explanation so my wife didn't left and one of the molecular let out such a strike was heard from one end of shemaii to the other who ever heard of such an excuse so who sent that mother down so he could experience what it was to have a wife that didn't let and the facility understood he was saying an autobiographical everyone enjoy your day but remember remember take the story the right way okay all right have a great day tomorrow take care bye-bye