Eli Rachlin's words based on Reb Yoel's teaching, Shaar haBitochen, Simchos, Shidduchim - R C Dalfin

say a art or something come on come on come on give me a breather Dental lecture no no no no this say something um okay I'll say something it's not related to uh not directly related to suus but I guess it's directly related to every day um it's actually from uh ran which I I started learning on the um on the recommendation of Dophin um and talks a lot about a havy sh and I just want to talk about just one small point of show maybe like an application of it um and of course everyone knows everyone knows the words you should love someone um like yourself and usually when people understand this they understand this as you should love someone um as much as you love yourself um so you love yourself this much you typically love other people less so you should try loving them up to the same amount which is very very hard of course but that's the that that's the idea you should try loving someone um at the same quantity as you love yourself and um Yan explains actually that Koka doesn't actually mean it l some as much as yourself it means in the same way that you love yourself it's not at all a quantitative thing it's a qualitative thing and what's the central difference about how you love yourself compared to how or how you relate to yourself compared to how you relate to another person it's not how much you love yourself it's that someone loves someone else let's see someone uh admire somebody and they say wow that person's amazing I love that guy whether it's he amazing at sports he's amazing if that's what what he deid love he's amazing because of something that has incredible value he's such a nice guy he's so nice he smiles at everybody um or he loves uh you know a God or gar say wow in in and he gives he he knows how to get the greatest year even though those are all loving someone for a worthy thing and there's nothing wrong with that but that love is dependent or that admiration is dependent on something else the person does it's what does that person do for me now even if it's completely good thing a person inspires me but even so person who inspires you it's still some you're you're love them essentially because of it's t you it depends on it depends on something and most of the time when we think of love we have for another person it's what do they do for me even if even if it's not selfish it's not selfish he he inspires me to be nice to people because he does nice things selflessly to people right um and admire him that way for example but when a person loves themselves the love for themselves is qualitatively completely different because it's Nate it doesn't depend on anything unless someone has unfortunately an underlying pathology everyone really loves themselves even people say oh I hate myself I hate myself for doing this they really I mean they might be a little depressed and then what you know what are they always see like in uh movies or TV shows or you know someone who's being talked off the ledge and and what they tell them about they tell them about how they tell them they appeal to the fact that person really does love himself You' got that that that you want to keep living and you want to keep doing these things so that part wasn't old KH saying that by the point is clar clarification yeah that that qualitatively a person starts with love for himself so this is by the way also the reason why if someone does and and so just so the point is that that's that that type of of um love which is which is qualitatively you you say I myself I I have no choice but to love myself I'm not going to hate myself I'm going and and that's something that that is is automatic as for whether I've have anything to admire or not admire turns out that sometimes that of course leads to admiration you know because you like yourself you like what you do but the truth is that that it it it's inherent and one area where I think this can also be um can be applied is when it when um when a person does something wrong and you tend people tend to give themselves the benefit of the doubt or they or if they even if they say okay I did something wrong but they tend to move on with it they'll say okay I did something wrong it wasn't the greatest thing but that's not that's not who I am I just I made a mistake I I'm I'm going to you know um and by the way that's kind of the same thing that we say before before Rashana and and yum Kipper right we say that the world can't be MK B right as sees the world can't can't be Sky B so what does this what does it really mean it means like what and we know that we need because we're basically saying in front of K we know we did all these all these things that are wrong but don't let that Define us so we so we did something wrong I mean not that that's a catchall excuse it doesn't excuse the behavior but points we still we still say that's not that's not who we are so because that's the way we look at ourselves the reason we use that excuse right is Al because that that's the way we look at ourselves we say I'm a good person so I made I made mistakes so the truth is that that looking at someone else quality qualitatively the same way we look ourselves me also means so it's not that we forgive ourselves or we give ourselves benefit out because we love ourselves x amount or Y amount it's because it's it's innate that we love ourselves um and that leads to that of course leads to um the idea that we therefore try try giving ourselves benefit doubt so the same is true with regards to to other people that one way to come up to come to uh you know I think to a higher madrea in terms of being able to give people the benefit of the doubt or even those times that we say Okay person did something wrong but even so I'm going to still relate to that person as a very very good person who happened to do something wrong and not not say that defines it makes him into a a bad person is by really trying to actualize this idea being try to treat them with the same kind of attitude that uh that we treat ourselves think it's before I forget you remember a name MOA Goldstein yes or no you know the whole story with I what he told me so you say say the story I'm not going to say the story okay I I don't know I don't know the whole story but if you see him give rev I I see him I see him now ative he just he just lost his mother 99 years old yeah yeah it's a happy story and a very sad story that I'm I know the happy part that's it anyway but but he asked me to send your regards so yeah he was um he start out he um his parents put him there was one year when the opened up on Ocean Parkway the very first year they sent a group called Bucker and to be the senior bucker who was learn the didn't this that I was in that group yeah and the father and Par is that he had a couple of and he put him and long story short I was learning with my this what it became very interesting and yeah but there's another part flat the flat Bush part the Flatbush flat yeah he said he had recess he was learning a flat and he says he him and his friend during recess they opened the door and they saw someone they walked in and they heard they didn't know who it was him was t t he gave a she and and his friend listened and it just week afterward week he came back and he said because of that he ended up going to the Yesa that's what he told me yeah story no so so all good that's all good exactly okay it's time for I got toan that the teacher you [Music] ready you're from Poland or he's from Poland you're from Poland from you're from Poland a this is ukraini not polish [Applause] words [Music] [Applause] what's going on over here my father comes to America in 1958 my father's from Romania survived came to he learned the famous in and L and in 1958 he makes his way through France he was six months by another famous and he wants to go to the re he wants to get married and he wants to make a living comes was on a boat and there was a I just heard yesterday from a friend of his that there was a famous P pocker unfortunately and whatever L my father had and some others was gone he met he met actually a on the boat named gel Berger gel Burger look at go if you goar you look at that those the MERS of the I forget the name May no not May no the to anyway anyway so you'll see his name he's a he was a very wealthy man a businessman from London and he was s so he he was on the boat and my father says to him he didn't know what he says to him he took away my money I don't have I eat ker I'm buy a soda says can you give me a few dollars can you give me help he says I don't want to give you because you give you d a minion and you included not religious people if you can include in the minion call them Wicked people to make up a minion you don't deserve my money my father said what are you at we don't have a minion on this we barely made a minion and he says you know what I observe the way you do and you D can real sh he says I can see you're I can see that you went to yes you can real God-fearing so I'm going to give you but I have a condition condition is when you come to America you have to go see the S he was father father needs to eat he needs a few bugs she was penniless so he says okay make a long story short my father worked when he came to New York he worked for PES he worked in a s mat Baker in Williamsburg who came in the middle so he end up seeing the S that's not what I wanted to tell you I want to tell you is comes to Yesa and Thursday night you know it's mishar night bage you know we also learned too heavy in the morning I learned here Maran for two and a half years till one in the morning I was sing away in the gar then we went but I would go to sleep something 56 in the morning lay down and 7:30 8:00 we were to be up so so he comes in Thursday night and his friends from Eric that came earlier and they're singing this nigan that I just sang For You Love Maya my love work K very much I really love my job I recall being in at this at the spartic temple on wilsh bua in Los Angeles and Dennis Prager was speaking there were a thousand a thousand young people in the room I'm not kidding was full of young people boys girls you know Dennis prer asks who here keep shabas not many people rais their hand he says who here would like to keep shots and then he ask the question who here can say they enjoy the job that they're they have and they get paid for it not many hands went up able to say you love being a dentist and you make a from that it's a that's a great thing I really love my job what job are we talking about exactly question is when things don't go our way when things the curve ball is thrown you know it's not the fast ball and it's not the fork ball it's a curve ball and all of a sudden save me where am I can you still say I love my job you still say I love the so listen to this dialogue in the nigan itself Ellie listen listen I love my I really love it do I really love my job I did sometimes sometimes don't it's normal it's normal to have fakers it's normal to have questions it's normal to doubt it's normal you learn a piece of you understand what tell it's normal it's not it's not normal not to have one that's what says in chapter 27 someone who says how can it be that these thoughts fall into my mind these foreign thoughts these disgusting thoughts says you're a bver who are you who are you you're a regular little man what what brings the P that's why you created to battle to struggle to to to to sometimes win and sometimes lose so in the N there's a dialogue I love my then you say do I really love my job we don't mean you know this work that work me do I really love being a parent do I really want to raise a Jewish Family do I really want to be in a Yeshiva do I want to really be and all that and the answer is I did it did it did sometimes I do sometimes I don't is that an answer that only makes the question stronger then comes the second night to the second night to the if you listen to the Nan and the voice goes up and [Music] deep one two three I do love my job you know why then you're talking to sh when your soul speaks there's no questions that's what a nigan is I told ell I was going to teach n explain a little ner a nan aabad nan in particular isn't just a nice tune with good lyrics and good sound and good beats n is soul the greatest composers were you know the hour that were composed by in Russia and Ukraine these were ye who who ding into hasem they poured their heart out in it it it it wasn't just you know they decided at you have to cetch like this and when it comes to you have to CCH like that that's not the way it works that's a that's someone who's trained in music and can sing great the whole idea of is the feel a certain way famous story I said it over today but right believe this fellow hears that his friend is in big trouble he owns a Tavern by a poer but non-jewish uh land owner and he says to him you owe me rent already six months you don't bring the rent by now and happens to be before you Kipper you're going to the hungry dogs goodbye you'll have they'll make nice CH out of you for you know you'll be finished thisle hears this say I have to save my friend when is there a better day to raise some money that of you k he goes out like we have in Brooklyn Ocean Parkway you know a lot of Russian Ukrainian Yen NE the they they know very little and then and they're playing cards poker or whatever they're playing over there dominoes but they're all sitting they're all sitting there so he says I'm going to go ahead of Y Kipper and collect money for my friend to pay the rent he goes there and they see a yle with a beard and payers and you know all that yamak and they say what do you want I want somebody to help a he says you want money no problem you see this glass this is wine we're going to fill you up with v and get it there and you'll make a br cuz you make a br and if you drink that up we'll give you a few dollars he drinks a cup of VOD they give him the money he's still short he goes further down he sees another group of K playe he says I need some more money for Stucker to help the year they said oh we s it you drank yeah we're doing the same thing we're going to give you more money but you got to drink another cup he drinks another cup and then he drinks the third cup and now he doesn't know where he is but he has the money he tell someone or someone else who he knew he says here give the money to this person so you should pay his rent but it's in ker tonight wait a minute he doesn't know where he is so he says where should I take you take me to Sho take me SHO you're drunk you're you're you're intoxicated gunon put me on a bench in the back and let me sleep over there at least I'll be in sh while being said that's what they do they put him on he know everyone has AAL it's awesome time everyone Lo is crying and tears and this it's really in he wakes up from his shiters half sleeping over there he wakes up and he sees everyone standing with the tow us up so he says right that's what we say get up in his mind he start one standing they wanted to eat him up and throw him out and break his bones you drunk you Shen and believe to take off his Towers don't touch him he just an knowed a decree that I couldn't know we delayed K because I saw a decree in our community B and and I was ding to and didn't go it didn't go when the heard saying that this he said anold the decree cuz he jumped from he jumped all the way to what's the point you have to be right but when you connect with your heart with your to the you can go directly from again I'm not advocating don't come to that's not the point point is where are you where and that's what a n is a n n a slow n puts a person into a a different frame of mind and for that you don't need recipes and you don't need others you could be walking by yourself or you could be in your own room and you close your eyes or you open your eyes and you sink to yourself you go into uh you know whatever trans no trans whatever I'm not talking about you know a metaphysical you know ideas I was there and I was there and at a life body at a body experience I'm not getting into all that it's also true and there's also times for that but we're not getting into that now this this isite the potency of a laav this my father heard his friend singing Thursday night in 770 1958 so my father asked them what do you guys know about a job you yish expression you know that means you're bench pressing I don't mean waiting waiting lifs yeah about you're sitting you're sing you're learning very good you're in the Yeshiva I he went to work to make a living He shited I remember when I was a child he worked in the the factories in in KN factories in the Burgen Street and other places with rats and mice don't ask double shifts at night to make a few dollars for his family so they should have a so he should have a paros he should be able to pay tuition as much as he can and bring home food Etc right here there is no you have to press a button now and do this now and decide this now it doesn't work that way all of that is very conditional you see there is a Judaism a t that's a conditional T tell you a story with salic actually we said we're going to tell few stories it's in this this for in the books but just just brings in's father was the RO of the of the of the city right Ra was a son of Sal was a own right who was the b in in the which was basically aab it was aab comes up he's about to blow the schaer he can't even put the schaer into his mouth because he's crying and he's in tears the for totally shattered the r says this I'm repeating what he says says stop cuz Hally it's not a time to cry and he brought a from from from lul you go say when you take a lul and you make the he theka right you also cry he said no he said well the together the bis you know the G of the Mitzvah the the essence of the Mitzvah is you're not allowed to cry that's the way the bris T you so he told them B you could tell the B whatever you want this man man is not putting on a show no one told him cry now he's start he's about to blow and you realize the responsibility the tears come automatically it's not a game here he's not conditioned there is a yish GU aish that's a conditioned you dis that does not and the both are fine but if if if you want to understand more what is this especially the way understands it's a heart expression and you know like I said before is the closest thing right with with with and everything else the was was yesterday right test you test right you test sor yeah yesterday right what that's right so wisdom understanding intellect and all that but if if you think that a real a real is saw my own father-in-law who was I think a friend of your fathers you know they were they were they were very deep people but they were very heartfelt people they were very heartfelt people Mish Mish they had a a broad heart you know it's called BR shaft the BR shaft which means brotherliness it's not about I told you a ver you told me a ver and it's a ver and F that's all true it's about brotherliness what do it saying my piece of bread is yours like mine and we say first yours then it's mine it's a whole different it's a whole different it's a whole different experience needs to be experienced needs to be experienced we talk about what are we going to do today the kids the the this with leaving and all the issue with the I I I firmly believe that if we saw today more of this experiential yish kite where it's in the bones it's not just in the cup it's not just in your head how much you know but it's in your bones and when you hear something about a ye you can't rest until you help to yeat then you see a living organism of of of Judaism of T the story with the r also the story with the milk right someone didn't have money it gives him money for the Ares so wife says's wife says he gave him a lot of money how much does it cost a few bottles of wine whatever he gave him a big b he says believe me if he's asking that he doesn't have money for wine he doesn't have money for M he doesn't money for fish he doesn't have money for for for meat he doesn't have thing you got to understand yourself and that idea of the brotherliness that what we we feel each other as brothers and sisters as that was a central theme in kabad theology it's not spoken about a lot but I'm telling you from the in side that made the that made the and it and it made it by the way not only when he was a when he was broken and shattered and needed but even when he wasn't give you another example so the same AAL that I told you about her great uncle right he said of bring 19 1940s 43 44 there was another you probably do before user s they called it s Yeah Usher made a lot of did very well in the black market and Russia he made good money Usher so come to that mendle was in charge one of the people to raise money for the yeshivas for the underground yeshivas the mle knew that Usher does very well my told me this my father told me the story he was there firsthand so he says to him says to him Yesa needs money give money for the Yesa so he takes out and he gives some money that M says to himer if you don't put down He said I'm saying if you don't put down all of the money I'm going to wipe the floors with you in front of everybody in front of everybody and he was best friend with Usher he was best friends with Usher they used to learn look in 770 upstairs when he were best friends he didn't CR he wasn't speaking at him he was speaking with him he was he was being malal he was he was revealing within Usher to overcome his inability to give it all away that's a Aid is not someone that always goes oh Ellie you're the best you're great say me Rabbi doin you're the best you're the best I don't need to hear I'm the best when we used to say and I went over to him once I said this that he said find someone in the Yesa who can give you good muser but really means it one guy the guys are in Yesa one friend if they really mean it they're not talking at you they're talking with you so this idea of brotherliness doesn't mean just in the C of it can be sometimes the C of you need someone to knock out knock some sense into you it's all right it's all right you know what they say if it's hot in the kitchen get out right but you want to be in the kitchen then you better stay there and and be ready so and the was that way too salv was that way too he was very tough very very tough his son after he lost after d lost three people his wife his brother and his mother in 1967 all within a few months of each other devastated so the year or two after his sonim listened toir and he says my father it's not my father my father told there was a Raging Bull in the A Raging Bull in the CL you could not you try to fake it and you try he tell say the g so he had like three I was told by someone who saw his he had three he would give someone who said it and and and admit it he didn't know it he wrote down didn't know but he said the truth some would have said it and do it very well and someone who said it and thought and said he knew it and he didn't know it and he didn't prepare well he wrote down liar very sharp there's no there's no you think he didn't love him he still loved him but the point was that who are you kidding what did you prepare I told you to prepare the Garra and you know I'm going to call on you cuz he can call on anybody in the classroom all that tained after he lost n of his three close his wife his mother and his his brother Sho he he he said he he wasn't the same you know but but in his good days in his good days he was fired fire I would say it was much more fire than was also fire people think that always want like this to you it's not true when you needed to sometimes get a a good zets you got the zets if you can't handle the zets you can't be in the kitchen you got to be able to handle the zets but a good good educator knows when to zets when not to zets how to zets which words to use you know what I'm saying who do you criticize who do you argue with some of you love some of you care for some of you don't care for go do it any way you want who cares about you someone you really care about you die a lot you argue you criticize hopefully it's constructive criticism not the empty criticism but you care about them it bothers you so when you learn and there's no shortcuts to learn told you Ellie told you you got to learn if if you're interested in this Mah you have to Simply take out the books and learn no DHA and no sermon and no faan and no teacher yeah we're you know there's a lot of good things and it's great but you got to you have to if you want to know G you got to learn the gar Tash and and everything else otherwise okay they tell a story ell story of uh not of of nickelsburg another big sadic I remind myself I forget now always tell it over go out to the story listen to this story balat became enamor with another sadic now there was no such a thing as we're jumping and playing rebis we're going to this re one day and this Reb another day and yeah that's a good spectator sport everyone's holy and everyone is good but you're something talks to you right so in kabad you know unfortunately you hear it sometimes from you know people or younger people and they're derogatory but the truth truth is it's wrong but in in in sh there's a sh here I'm not going to go into because the world today is not a vessel but you know what they make a joke they say there's the boo The Bu je no not the the the the bre La car right they have a acak look everything is good good good but a person sorry you're sh gets a fire from if you're really going deep into your soul it's it's it one thing talks to you so for to all of a sudden go to and not just visit and and respect but identify with a with um another it was problematic for them one of the of the decided to go to another sadic if I forget now the name and he comes back and he says to his in whatever wherever it was and he says fire the man's on fire the this person's is mish it's really fiery and and he and he and he starts kind of intimating he wants to kind of go over you know so his friend um I wish I remember his name he says they say to him of the re the great from so he says he says so Fire by so Brent the brento himself is not on fire it's the rebi within that's on fire that's not you have to be on fire is a pointer he gives you aah he gives you but at the end of the day you have to do it and if you don't do it then you could be the biggest seemingly and it ain't you it's him is on Fire Within you you are asleep so this laage this is a it's a heavy M but when you learn and sit and talk it out with whatever you will you will you will get there you will get there so therefore you can't say how will I look in 10 years from now if I how will I look in 10 years how how did I look 10 years before if only I kept you know that standard and not allow the gosh to SLE me down everyone has to go through their own there's an English word cathar catharsis cathartic experience a paradigm shift everyone has to go through their own inner turmoil to bring out the best say sing and you sit with others and you learn that's why ell learning is galic but's learning has to express itself in a play Mish and it's not for me to tell you the P Mish you and each one of us here has to on our own this come to a point what's my PO Mish that was his PO Mish at that time yeah and I'm not saying that some people begin with the other people begin with different things and again does one have to to as we said in the early in the beginning does one have to I don't want to be alab no problem there was a some of you might have heard of him fall short I think it was a contemporary of his father's so he once came to Lakewood cuz he was a relative to the former Cutler's son-in-law new name was I don't remember the name they divorced I don't remember the name anyway so he was related so they let they they had a respect for him he was also going he spoke to he spoke to the so so he what's it called he came to Lakewood was takus a few hundred people in the Su Lakewood oh and he's looking around and he says to everyone you all think I came here to Lakewood to make you the babure or you have it all wrong you know why we got enough theab trus in 770 we don't need more we have our own and I'll add to that we have our own problems but he said if you want to see a ye who means what he says come visit the if you want to see a Jew who means what he says in his yish is a then I urge you to come take a visit to 770 and meet but we're not looking for more laes so everyone says yeah you guys are looking to prize and make no we're looking for EMS EMS there's a famous goes where do you get a little truth the and the re shared commment and Ali they were both EMS I'm telling you and I didn't go to Wu and I'm not as talid I wish I would have heard a Shear from him but I didn't have the SE to go to hear a Shear of his but in researching him and studying him and interviewing people who knew him he was isus the was an is you know how many people stories upon Stories the rman brothers very wealthy you know and from Toronto so they when there was a certain between laage and others he side with the others whatever I don't and they heard about it said I I he wanted to give $4 million for every Jew want to give a dollar he wanted to give a dollar the gave out dollars so the the one of the r wanted to give the Reb 14 13 14 million doar for each Jew in the world that said he's not interested because he was very upset with him at the time at that time at that time doesn't mean later it wasn't a change there was what's my what's my point my point is that EMS EMS truth EMS is a is is something that is is very very difficult the cuts the famous ker of kot right of K they said to him why are you so such an extremist you know the ker was a big extremist so he said the says the middle path what do you what what exactly so you know the kka said when you're on a road in those days no pav Road and cars who walks in the middle of the road a horse so you want to be a middle in middle of the way you'll be a horse ker went with an extreme for EMS but the idea of EMS it's not it's not it's not an easy job especially the world we live in everything is Tainted everything has a spin everything's in the spin you know when you learn I can tell you one thing kidas doesn't let you fall yourself if you really learn to see this boy do you know who you are and you'll be EMS it'll be more modest and it'll have a better relationship and better success everyone should learn to see this and I don't know where my wife is I don't see her here but my wife wherever she abashi where did she get lost whatever I wanted her to learn with yila and and and maybe Goldie she learned sh very important to learn today sh they my wife has a two friends they learn on the phone 10 minutes a day and it's m brought to them I tell you I hear I heard it from my sisters my wife got by her sister to started in La she's learning with two friends start learning women women with women this they have they in English the art scol the felt time theab they all have you know goods for every day together first of all you buil you buil friendships and you're also creating this idea of friendship through we need today a lot of we talk for our children we need for we need for everything someone thinks they they have it made let them think again look how people fall have to mention name billionaires people Gish overnight nothing only you have you need and you should know encourage a lot of people in the letters to learn thato you have but in particular so especially women have to this a good thing for women to learn and then the women bring in the into the husbands and then talk them to the kids and becomes a whole energy in the house and and when you have you to do anything right because the fact that it doesn't seem this way and this questions and all this help that we should have now we should have a rest of and then so after the next I'm going to tell you about and then I think we'll how are you haven't spoken to you in ages a [Music] h [Applause] [Music] [Applause] he [Music] so coming to K here I reminded myself that I was here here probably about 15 20 years ago I think once for shabat was Simon made of theab house then I also when I was researching the impact of communities onim where I still here he was a friend of Minea class older and spend time with him and then I once spoke here about when my book came out on the and in here Beth yeah I don't know where that is but somewhere here the idea of e living all over is part of our story yes I know that U I've heard that there's a strong alah movement in this community like in boan so certain communities and that's great and wonderful even though tell you the truth that of wasn't for it people can jump up and down but re risky and admitted to it they first came to re salvic told what he want from me I want your blessing you ain't getting my blessing finally he said go and it's so much so much but um for a Russian Jew like and Sal the whole idea this this it's not thing that also wasn't pushing people to here so it's not that they were where are they coming from I want to go into that I want to philosophize now but they were coming from that where you are you have to make repeats that V from the someone came to and and he said I'm having issues I'm told him make here he take that the it's not just saying that it was a that a ye needs to make wherever he is if he can if he can accomplish both things like someone told me RA I remember when I say who I remember who it's beautiful V and he was he had a in his house and Al galic and I said them what what are you doing here you can have that in in in in in New Jersey you can have it in Lakewood you can have it in brookly in a Mil Basin why do you have to come here to have a he says if I can have the best of both worlds why not the the is a truism wherever you are and that was the by these type of and such people I don't see that you were against going to I there were also issues you know other issues but it was like where are you escaping to where you escaping to you know the and it's online you can hear the videos where they came to the rebba they were they want to a and the rebba said to them basically you're going to go to ex saturated with rabbis and teachers if you tell me going to he going to tell aiv in the heart of the lion where my daughter is a over there in dis goov Center you're going there you got C blonds go because you you'll t a you'll make a difference what are you going to do in your I'm going to give a Shear a lecture oh really that's 500 lectures and I know I I I was I spent 20 years back and forth I know I know the the area I don't have to tell you everyone knows here you want to make a difference a person should want to make a difference not should want should make a difference person ask where should I live where should I work where you can make a difference the says always the people where you can make a difference if you're just going to be another number you shouldn't be there I'm not talking about sh is talking about working together with your husband with your wife and all these Nas all these points but what difference can can it make sometimes people live because their children children not getting a good here there's issues know you run away there you know what we had Friday nights I don't know if any you guys know but the same issues like here the same Hangouts you know you're from you were a young boy you were a good boy you know what I mean everyone's a good but I'm saying you know on over there everyone hangs out in the park so what's the difference there or or or or or Ocean Parkway in Brooklyn or flatfish what's the difference so the re and salic both shared my humble opinion thisa that they anti they weren't anti alah the way people take it they were into do here Aliah make here Aliah if it's best for you to go there and you're going to and you're going like you said before it's the quality right the no problem make sure but I do want to say a ver about simplest T because not only because I'm a liar I would be a liar right if I wouldn't say a ver about simp I'm always fascinated about simp why am I so fascinating simple St simple stated to me is the day not only culminates all the young cavor but it really shows What You're Made Of previous in a m t b you can look it up know the previous when he came to America was an ill person but there was one year that he had better health within his weak Health one year was 1942 4142 t b and that's why if you take a look there's a mimer almost every week others young and others they remember the come down think Monday night and it would say previous so one of them on caught my attention he says why do we dance with the he says it's to accustom your body toz for a mitvah that that that thought when I when I learned that it it Mish once a year you want to shitz and you and and this is the in other words when it gets hot and uncomfortable you're for the Mitzvah the same with a menal foas it was once 90° inad which is near Tel Aviv over there it's very hot they have a flat roof onad on Yesa and the air conditioner broke 3:30 by starts to say the the second say there second nigor no one's there coming it's boiling there's one person there with his frog and his caset like a little different the black the side the side that's what he wor yeah that was him and a few other and he's there looking learning something a comes in and see know maybe if you go out to the porch and B will hear that you're on the porch there a little more air than sit inside without air condition and a flat roof and the sun baking on us maybe then they some more B will come in to learn he says what I should show them that the heat gets me to cancel and change a little heat is not going to disturb the learning he's a Russian ye a BAL neish was but my own father-in-law story that I always tell over just to bring out this he once came I don't know some say was sukus another time I'm not sure when but he lived in Australia my wife grew up in Australia they with the founding families the B families in Melbourne who's your following Sarah bransky so they they um he once came I don't know why how it was a 30 hour it was a 30 hour plane ride stopping in Singapore in Hawaii in San Francisco and then on to New York very long today it's much shorter still long still much you can get a 13-hour flight direct but in those days you couldn't do that for some reason he didn't have food I I heard it was so and and he and he came into 770 it wasn't like today going out at 770 now the party is just starting you kidding 11:00 they're just getting warmed up setting up they're setting up now but in those days in 1970s Street seven was either in a su like we are for bringing and talking we're at home sleeping one here one there it wasn't 770 was dark 770 was dark and myar comes into 770 he arrives was one one laab 770 at that night at that time was 2: in the morning I think 1 2 in the morning his name was EST he was the for Russian Jews in Los Angeles mity on Fairfax Avenue and he's a Russian too he was a Russian so my says to him we have something to eat says I haven't eaten in 30 hours th so he goes and he says he finds him bread bread but not fresh bread old stale bread and he gives it to him and says thank you upstairs in 770 at the end of the hall right before they call the room and the have weddings over there there's a little sink so he goes out to wash his hands he starts walking to the sink and he turns back to Nai and he says to maybe you have some salt he looks at my father say but it's 2 in the morning there's no one around there's no food I barely have some stale bread if you want salt so you can dip your bread salt says yeah I don't have give some back that's is that's y I'm a little uncomfortable it's hot I'm talking to myself cuz I get hot and I need air conditioner my wife will tell you you I don't have the air conditioner I go nuts what are you going next for cuz you're spoiled you're a spoiled a American you know what they used to call us Americans she grew up with Russian chocolatin chocolate you know little chocolate you need a lick of chocolate you know we live in a free Society free country Hashem gives and she gives more no question about it but come on it gets a little uncomfortable when you dance and and even if you can't dance for whatever reason you clap and you move there are people like saw in 770 they they go like this the whole time you can't dance whatever reason you're moving you're smiling you're singing You exert your physical body for the the the says says that's the reason we dance with it that's one the reasons that that institut us dancing the is to for you want to accustom your body toit for a mitvah and now it's no surprise that the says that whoever dances the 48 Hours one day he says he says it and if the was a bigadic says it I believe believe him and I know it's the true that if you dance with kav you know in Star kite in your dances he'll give you aaoa whatever word you want to use not into school not into school but you know this sayos all in particular so someone struggling with P the says Just Dance away it's good for it's good for me but I'm giving you the the idea the the um supporting the Rab's idea because when you canit for a Mitzvah you deserve it's not easy to sh Mitzvah we don't want comfort and we should have comfort and more comfort I remember I brought her grandfather and his brother-in to had Torah in kits with my friends and we made a fa they were both in town and asked a question I asked him a question who do you consider bigger the re today talk about 1981 881 or the alter of who who who Who's greater so you ask you know a real serious guy will tell you the AL when know her grandfather said her grandfather said the re but mle said actually doubted this and her grandfather said and and her grandfather was much more you know thoughtful and intellectual and and calm was very you know an educator the mendle was more of a fiery talkative imposing you know he was a real demanding the grandfather was a different different style and he said I remember he said the why the because to live through everything we live through today with all the challenges all the and all the difficulties and and and to be a ye and to be a and to be committed it's Cal y have SE went they have a horse and buggy and a little straw to sleep on we have all the tyers what what did the the H said a if you would put the Tas in a little safer like the Tanya and you would put the a in a in in front of us we would all be good instead you put the aish in a little book called The t a little sa and you put the tiers in front of us you have complaints so the are very real the challenges are real when you learn and you fa and you live together and you and you learn together and you talk together and you feel liberated you really feel you feel liberated and this explains many many things sometimes people see some they're a little like wild and it's coming from a different place you have to understand what's coming from it's coming from a different place you know what I'm saying so yes outwardly it might look a little vill wild but if you know the marcker the source it's a whole different thing like I said before there was salvation in the alah if you understand where they were coming from it's not that they're anti Aliah what he wanted of Riskin was hey Riskin make a FR face him in hat or New Jersey I don't know what you know what I'm saying so they should help they should help that everyone should particularly to dance to smile to to to clap whatever to to to you know I was once my family we were simp in Shai I don't want to say witha I went into a reala with some heavy and everything those but they were dancing like I don't know it's hard for me to see dancing as I like falling half asleep even without Mas even without wine your body should be moving how could you you know it's it's the the best day it's one day so remember this year you know I say to my I say always when when yum comes out of shabas it's like one to three cuz shabas we have shabas every week right so we have shabas every week no look over great next week back to work my father always says M shabas he's running to end shabas why is running to get to jump into geh geham opens up M where you running to name the minute the clock ends I need my cigarette for those that are still smoking or I I need to go on my internet or whatever else where you running to get him opens now maybe if he delayed a little bit I'm not talking about keeping thas man whoever keeps it galdi just talking about the concept the concept got to slow down slow down I was bash you were out I was telling the women and the men too that teaches you how to have and to slow down got to go like a basketball court right time out relax there's nowhere to run it'll wait for you the same few dollars if few D wants you to make it you're going to make it if he doesn't want you to make it you ain't making it you can jump upside down and backwards and forwards they help that first of all rafall and your wife and Ellie and your wife and and to everyone else that you know participated what's the acronym I don't know you let it be the the year of Redemption p p whatever anyone can make their own you know this is the they can TI everyone can make whatever they want it doesn't say any much this kid but you know we we got it we got to get a hold of ourselves and and and really get moving get moving and those that are able encourage you to to to learn you know I gu online can't you know you can't join live listen just saying uh see this again Ellie started to learn which is you know has a head for it and he does it as ging but there's a lot of online everyone should please make a don't forget I we have is coming and we should only have to every one of us every one of us for our children ourselves grandchildren in and we should it's not just some kind of bub Mia will come and he is coming and we have to participate in his coming yeah to listen to your latest series