Constructive Criticism Lecture by Rabbi Chaim Dalfin in Hollywood, Fl Eckstein home - 12-30-19

Oh valid the fourth day of may she rest in peace figures passed away I wanted to do something miss Emma should of course go up is higher and the best thing you could possibly do is Tara mitzvahs you know learning Torah doing this fuss in the shame and the name the deceased gives the Shama the possibility in Chabad there's something called if I bring you now I'm sure you're all familiar with the word for Brendan sorry cold conquer context of a brain game is back in in Russia and by the way I'm coming from Russia I was in Poland and in Moscow I was in Warsaw Moscow two weeks ago and it was there until 1915 1916 when the fifth Rebbe of the Bravo chip so embarrassed that arfa bring in a real a real for bringing I don't mean just a speech but you know I'm giving now a class of pork this is not a for Brendan it's a very nice event itself of Reagan gather four two three four five six seven hours and you don't look at the watch you don't even you don't care about kind you care about can I find it inside naturally when you do that it lends itself to Krita ingen is the culmination of learning the Dominique I had a great uncle's name was remember for the fossa known and he would say the following he said then give it up and it could be that when you hear the problem and the issue and you know that person and you say you're a real and if you don't say it you think you say I know who you are [Music] giving it to the person with all of a sudden you lose the visa Sarah t-that in Hebrew that we would write me must me mote sincerity and you're now in the cloak of a citizen in the closing and went over tower my sphere of blessed memory that male feeble was a very special Jew said you know I'm learning and I'm doubling and after bringing but I feel all right now it's aye-aye-aye and again I I don't like that I would and all that well your character is lacking this year and in this area we get I should cut myself she was a kebab if I brain as well anyway committee was and the other half Russa and a friend and they were learning Thursday night and they were learning late into the night the next morning when you go to sleep 3:00 4:00 in the morning it's difficult to get up at 7:00 right especially for you I'm sure he's gonna you know but eight o'clock or so at 7 o'clock his father comes into the room and he's thought and he's giving it to him and he walks out of the room the friend who was woken up by the October in County California as a sphere for the Reverend Northern California across the Golden Gate Bridge let's go and the main person who asked me to come to be the rabbi there is a doctor a pediatrician a gynecologist at Kaiser the califor California you know medical system hospital system a good Brooklyn boy who study after Brooklyn what am I doing with my life if I school we met the same girls we went to the same movies and you know I know you're not Orthodox but still what does can't you eat something else that's one neutral so he asks me do I give him permission to curse out his friends to chastise them to give them criticism if you are playing golf with him that you don't have a relationship the fact that you guys are both kind of color which was offered by Salomon Kalou Mohammed in Brewer commercial Talarico if the spirit of dominion of governing of control comes upon you MacLean Corral Conahan don't forsake your place Kmart a young young Italian Godiva because healing inclination referring to the age of her will not boomers Gabriella mystical or it won't dominate a multiple is there and that the cure to the a terrorist Pisco me the horizon means verses and phrases of Torah book madness over Metis rabbity help reclaim my mom bro now he brings another interpretation the Midrash the Midrash are versed in Co helis right the first interpretation comes from something called Carrigan Jonason the second Butte a new successor comes with a Nava of modesty be humble you were putting the language Ella or L asked McGirt on the cola ham it means that he saw himself he's the leader he's the rabbi he's the scholar he's the prophet show her you can have mana look at this he was four things he had four things going for him look at the ceaseless hustle MLF he was this son-in-law he's a real of a big matter because the spirit of Dominion and governing and control that comes to a person was given that position in the claim a are your knee off don't forsake your place and please remember to be humble yes you are the CEO of the company you are the entrepreneur you're the one that's the shaker the baker and the shaker that's great remember who gave you the who gave you this talent be a part of it the position of authority you see it you know not understand that but you under you'll relate to it and it's a very important point because this touches upon the whole idea of authority and Rubinius and rabbi and leaders which is in every congregation in every community who I have you ever asked yourself a question why do I kosher or not we're talking about a path of life a path of life who can tell you what your path it there it's way beyond just rabbinic s-- it's a soul experience so his question here is and what he's what he's alluding to is that if the Torah if King Solomon according to the second interpretation of the Midrash about a person who is on that level Anna thought tomorrow according she explained a contradiction between the first part of the verse of the second part of the verse right the compare and contrast is a essential part contrast understanding both sides and telling you that Alabama should happen that I saw it I'm not saying no one else's this way but what I saw because I was his student and his closet what I saw was an individual who took responsibility for the entire generation and were thousands of people listening to but he can have what wants which he never never you know because it wasn't that type of Tory you knowing how much information you have and how charismatic you are and how Olsson how many degrees you have after your name to PhD in the MS and the MA and all the different amounts to one big ego and at the end of it there you don't want to be with that person you're not comfortable you're not interested but he knows Omar he come in to hear a lecture leaders you hear that he speaking to the rabbi's and the CEOs and the big mockers and they're really doing something that's incredible howl of Judaism says only ten percent might say you're obligated more than that you want to be real Froome you want to be really just gift what about some of this 40 percent 50 percent but dr. once is already in Alabama she passed on comes over to me once he asks me who's also in California when I was there as a student older study says broker from the right gazettes from the left guess coming from there it's a mess he had a nicer design designers suit tonight and I said to myself if this guy cannot dress me he's worth money now that's Lucy fainting a part of this this fellow right but nevertheless what's the point the point is that the back of the line between doing something to be asked them tatius versus doing something to be genuine as if you're smiling what's the answer you know the answer is part of it when you think about yourself you will be not as happy I walked into a lawyer team 81 or 82 I will show Boulevard in Los Angeles I would ask him to put on film this was Friday I'm proud of Who I am but this week I asked you to closer though I said yeah I'm actually wondering why this was very interesting that you did that and my chef says fella you need to be humbled so if the right way I could humble you and be careful but is that the only way and is that months No there are other reasons why a person has to go through whatever they go through reincarnation to that aspect tonight Hashem God Almighty says to the person if you think about yourself the kitchen there 24/7 so if you want a coffee and a piece of cake you got it if you want it now no milk you got it too and if you want jolt you got it too that's not why I go there I go there cuz I love to begin my day with broken people people are homeless youth Jews ice that here are nothing your everything and at the same time you're nothing because it's all about a Shem and what you can do for interior which we'll discuss at another time but this is the I think a very important point is to stop and think and ask yourself I'm about to be you know and you know about to give criticism to my spouse to my employer to my son to my to my rabbi to my student what have you done to give yourself criticism you know the famous saying moonship buff I'll tell him in La Habra your own blemish that you have don't say it to your friend you're guilty so how can you your hypocrite so saying to his own Hassidim let's bring it back to the head yum yum that we began with you know what he said Brett if I bring it and you're doing consider group therapy and you of the deserves mother and it's also the end of Hanukkah they the eighth day is the culmination of the lights of Hanukkah and were entering the month of a vase we are in a vase what has tables come from Tove good it's a month of you know to internalize it not just not cursory superficial you know experiences the whole idea of Casa de stat the Baal Shem Tov to Judaism 300 years ago and going strong and stronger is to experience God and Torah in an internalized way with happiness and with excitement but that also includes tough questions after my grandfather was murdered by the Nazis and I went to his town where he was murdered mock old Massa gets 45 minutes outside of Brussels and I went to my grandmother's town and found her marriage records married in 1935 with her father to a synagogue so you know and give us we say there's an expression about how good coffee cup is ahead right how can you stir hole you have to hold your head where's me to help the cup you have to be strong you have to be focused don't lose yourself to all the whims and issues at the anti-semitism that's happening now all around us for right and the goal Oh some clothes never again grandchildren my little grandchildren have to escape 8 o'clock in the morning before the parade starts so they don't see older mishegoss but someone comes into the shul my daughter says to me Tom if she gives me her hand I'm not shaking her hand so I say Sarah Sarah neighbours daughter Sarah why not of course he's not a she she's a he