Constructive Criticism - 29 of 31

tell me this sounds familiar and you talk hours days and the guy basically Center doesn't listen to you and does just the opposite you feel so lousy I wasted all this time I could have been playing golf I could have been learning I could have gone swimming I could have spent drive my wife and instead I spent so much time with you taking away from other important things why because I care for you says the Rebbe don't really care for him you're a lawyer you know why you're a liar because if you really care for him it wouldn't bother you an iota that the fact that he does contrary to what you want cuz it's not about you it's about a Shem if it's something that's wrong when you make the statement and you try your best what happens afterwards is between him and our Shem not you and if you are so bothered that you're turned off and you're angry at him that you wasted your time on him it shows from the begin with you had an agenda and if you had an agenda you're in no position of giving criticism what do you say about that and that ever says this is explained in this latter verse like seesaw elevate claim I shall a macabre a hook I shall be doubly politic offer the fact that he didn't listen to your scolding rap like she's so great don't carry a burden against him I would say a little different now shouldn't don't be bothered by it don't be angered by it that's right yeah I spent all this time and I want to tell you something fellas this Oaks includes our spouses closest friends I know it's a hard one to swallow you spend time with your wife or your wife with you or with your child and you put so much into them and they don't do what you want you get you get burnt you get upset are you getting upset if you really did the right thing for God it shouldn't bother you it's between them and God I heard from the rebel myself once and if I bring in a very famous talk I'll just make it brief it's already printed and times you know every month has an acronym according to the Aretha that spells out that you'd cave of K for this coming month not table schrott it's a verse in block eyesight Hoyer who is Morris a year when you when you have an animal that you dedicate to the altar today some English and then you decide it's not nice enough and big enough and fat enough and you want any a find another animal that's bigger and better you say I want that other one to be the sacrifice that's called the Tamura in exchange says the holy Torah then if you already dedicated an animal and you decide to make another animal for her Yahoo Smirnoff see you later the first animal had the second animal both should be holy now you know they just use it for your you know ice before you're a desert those letters in the Torah for you who somewhere else a year according to the Ariza its UK buff K you look at it you'll see the Rebbe ask the question if I'm bringin that was there and asked why is the acronym of the result only those four letters and not the left two words of the process of year kodesh so you're gonna answer because your code this doesn't make up the acronym it doesn't wouldn't make sense that's a technical answer but philosophically what's the message here and the rebus said the message is that your job is to try to make in exchange and bring another Jew back to the Father in heaven whether that you will become holy or not religious or not is not your business I heard that from the rebel whether or not your wife listens to you it's not your business whether or not you son listens to you is not your business not now I'm saying in the vernacular or not your business I you know I don't mean it means in other words if at the end of the day they decide to find their own path it's between them and how colors burrow and it's a very hard thing to swallow especially the closer you are to a person the more you love them the more you care for them and the more they don't do yeah but you exactly what you think is right that so on one hand you have to do your job but it ends there whether they'll be kodesh near Kodesh it's not part of the youth cave of K you know it's only the youth cave of case holy you and the exchange shall be you and the exchange you go out to make a an exchange what will be whether they'll be holy or mundane leave it up to a shell and I know myself working in this field for thirty plus years sometimes this gets very very difficult tell you another story I was living with a year Tanya in midtown Manhattan I would travel from Borough Park where I lived in Manhattan one hour on the train we learned for an hour as businessmen he was Prime was tight and then I went back a three-hour once a week and we were learning very nice he's very intelligent man he belonged to her front temple and one day he he tells me my friends asked me why are you learning with a Chabad rabbi to reform temple you're not religious you're not Orthodox like you know you have nothing better to do with your time so he said to me and I didn't have a good answer for them but I said to them if he will push on me mitzvos and putting on trillion and you know but really push me I'm gonna stop flirting with it this was at a time when I was like five six years into our learning and he wasn't doing he wasn't becoming more observant and Here I am slapping two hours each way through you know and it's like I do I do something and just that Shaba so I decided I'm going to now kind of let him have it at this session you know I'm gonna return come on do a mitzvah you know come on a little stronger that Shabbos up yoke on my teacher - teacher if I bring the basement and our shul and he told over a similar story what's up with someone that he knew energies from rebels key mayor Basinski who had a student as well who also was learning with him for years and didn't move and he wanted also I don't have it but he wrote to the Rebbe first and there ever said don't say a word and I heard this from the Bo the Shabbos before I was gonna go to Manhattan on Tuesday Wednesday and give it to my guy so I shall shut my mouth and I kept quiet and then he told me later you know few weeks later whatever you know that if you would have said something to me I would have been out the window today he has a beard till here problems every day to ten eleven o'clock goes to the makeup and he looks like the altar that was closeted and he's a serious learner and he works hard and successful how you clear