Breslov, Ger & Chabad - Rebbe shows a Yiddish how to internalize Torah - R Chaim Dalfin #5

the B recorder what there's the B he's the B recorder what's your name do you learn here in Lakewood so just say one story yeah please good I'm off the hook by my by my mention and your father came yeah they were sharing so they were in that time was like a uh middle of nowhere they were like in a so but that both and your father were a little uh active V we're looking for some activity activity yeah so if I remember correctly think you think your father once convinced my to go to a uh graphologist what are they call someone that reads hands yeah graphologist yeah graphologist hand okay so the Pal Reader and the Pal Reader told going to be a chest CH I never heard yeah so what happened says could be Could Be A Champion but I never tried so uh so he spoke he spoke about you could have all the potential in the world there's no have in the world you don't bring it out intoa nothing from it nothing comes from it exactly so recognizing that we have not only looking at the the year not room saying he has a those looking at yourself and saying I have a i that's going back to the you know having personal relationship something that we have to find in ourselves not truth when you go you go put on phone with put pH 50 Years start breing DN crying it's very inspiring like you know what I I don't feel that what I'm putting ping them in Disguise I I was few weeks ago the year there he was um his wife was there so he was visiting his wife and he's you know you know there's some people that figure everything out they figure everything out they know everything know I fig out comes I Dro you come act so nice and you're like uh so friendly and everything but I know what you want there I know you want to convert everybody that's you ging me a whole Dr 15 tell me how how my he figured me out and I'm here to convert him to so I told I'm not going to not going to argue with you let's put on and he agreed and after pH he said he didn't phone 50 years and uh BR my he was thanking me so much for uh for giving you an opportunity after I was thinking about he's talking about how I'm here to convert and then he agrees to do something that is part of the conversion process and then he's thanking me he's thanking me for you see like just the surface it just has to come out so have to recognize in ourselves in our own shamas to l mhm so you know needs to have a bottom line a result whether with all night or half a night or only a few hours you need to walk away with something it doesn't mean many you need to other way like said so I was thinking asked me to come and really you you you deserve not pumping to make these beautiful beautiful the is very happy with you I'm very serious for many things but for this just to to think about bringing together listen it's as you say anyway so um I was thinking way here in preparation a little bit today thinking what what would be something good and here I'm talking also to the the I said this before when had me in Tom's River once or [Music] twice lenon Tanya but seriously not you know oh it's come shabas tell you I was one time in my life in Monroe said I was many times in lakid until about 10 years ago I never was in L with truth be told growing up at the time when I was growing up there was a lot of issues and you know when you're you're you're a you're hotheaded you know and what that's they Ro yeah that's they threw rocks in me right so Lakewood and I had no Shas no no connection you know and on the contrary I don't want to come here St talking about when the and those times you know whatever it was a very difficult time was very good laich and you know but anyway but as I got older smarter and I started to write and to research you see a bigger picture so you see from a whole different perspective doesn't mean I became in the same with s and Lakewood and pic and TS and you know sardam andage what do you think we don't have we don't have you know the famous ver three groups G and kabad you know the word the youngsters don't know the ver you know the ver no wrest was always talking about ton and the most sense depressed always depressed you know what I'm saying Melancholy but they're always talking where's the holy K truth K would say says go right a balance the middle of the road said the holy cut who goes in the middle of the road a f a horse goes in the middle of the road a mench a person is an extremist other to the right or to the left middle you got like a little little sheep she you know if you something you don't go in the middle of the road you you you voice your opinion to the right or the left NOP the part part among is that the this it's not saying that month that ker demanded of K G became the outgrowth of K Etc is whatever it's not lived up to and the speaks about you heard it tonight right the yes becoming and the biggest bers they know they understand every joke every V has some truth to it so so um the the T put you know I I I teach Tanya we finish I have for English speakers and I teach them online I have someone there that teaches them and we just finished the first now we started a half an hour Monday through Thursday A4 to 8 to a quarter after 8 it works out for them in the afternoon and we created we have almost every day 10 people a talk about a a good group mid middle-aged people some are still working business people soci social workers you know artists intelligent people a real healthy group of people as far as your personalities and and then we become real tight and him through that screen I mean when I started it in 2018 I was N I flew back and forth eight times the one who sponsored it wanted to get off the ground and he asked me I knew him LA and in this format why am I telling you that so we've been learning now we learn the of the AL that he puts into T are a living organism of of mental and godliness I'm not saying this because I'm it I'm saying this take a look told me this once take a look at any it's on the para not any most another one of two all the to the safer that is a what we call a thesis an essay that talks about who the ye is who the person is and what the person should be doing and what is the psychological ideas behind the person is thead and that's why kadisha of who was born into it's in my book over here on the second volume of and I think the second volume third volume anyway so he carried around I was I was told this by by some of his closest in his pocket had a little T Little T he became a big lit [ __ ] didn't didn't didn't agree a lot with the they put it mildly but this the he stopped it there was a sh but he stopped it and the was O but he he stopped it it's in the book anyway um and again I'm not saying he stopped it because it was T he had his reasons but I don't want to go into that right now the is okay alak learns it his way AB learns it his way alab learns it his way one thing's for sure and you have to learn it seriously it's like learning I told you before I told and when you learn the T and you immerse yourself in that you're a different person it's a different person tell he must heard the was a family the same a cousin this MOA Gadi this this Rabbi G's great-grandfather's brother he had two brothers one was Alman G zman was in New York and he was a big Asin very special years zmani SOI once went to the airport and if you got something at home now you probably know in yeah that once you start on a trip you shouldn't turn back I forgot something very important so he called in to the Marcus to the re's office to please ask what I should do told him and then you then you go back you're not the same person this isn't a joke playing a little game here you know finagling ah how can we make a loophole how can we get around it that's not that wasn't he meant it when you learn a piece of you learn it men so what I share with you is if all we walked away with from tonight is to either on your own or but to really learn it in you're going to be a new mench and this is for all ages and all kinds you know the T isn't just a a frer t is not a CL for every if you if and not everyone has not everyone is able to explain it you know well well well so you have to find a teacher someone just wrote me on the way up with the driver that brought me here he says I want someone who's a philan anthropist and very fine person alab he says I don't know Tanya well tonight I want to learn Tanya I want to master Tanya he says so he says what Rabbi what do he suggest I wrote him back one line find yourself a tutor you have money to build a building spend some money on yourself at a Tor and paying top dollar to teach you and then you'll know T like a like a like a if that's what you want so you have another you have people around but the said once not but the said once I remember this I think was if you have a you have a complaint against what should you do you re you don't like your re did this what you do say tell him don't break their Windows theny said once that shabas if they're sleeping in their home knock on the doors re I want to learn with you yeah Los Angeles I remember we were the S 770 is that made in 1959 5859 what it's called right the made seven who will say a and seven will say a p in inal whatever they learning in the Yesa naturally the were amongst the best B in the Yesa so we when we went out to Los Angeles we took upon ourselves the same thing we were 10 of us so every week someone else said a [ __ ] some I said a and bris going open and he didn't learn when he was young then became a but you understand he didn't you don't learn tell to me it's a certain things you get inab from youth that you could become aab later but you don't get it you don't have it it just it's the way it is it's you know it's it's the it's the schm and heading I'll tell you a story about that soon if we get to it heading the by The Tick you either get it or you don't get it you know what I'm saying you can't buy it so so I said a people I said about I about the of this 10 the says doesn't have its own independent life right the eclipse this week what does that mean so I spoke about this concept and I expressed myself by saying heard this is in the base this is in it was in the dining room with all the Young and the older he got up from a seat and he went over to me and he picked me up by my collar he's very strong I'll kill you like how can you say there's no sounds like you know a dialog you know YouTube with that other Bo if you haven't seen it you have to see how they're they're tearing each other apart and that was that the M they like you think they want to eat each other up kill each other did the same thing at that at that time years later I lived in La as a as a married man so told me he says I have such today that say there's no and I want to be beat them up and throw them out I don't have who to argue with I don't have learning learning it's not just you know the L use the word we don't use that is called that you known snags word you know they use a different word effort diligence but the is the same the is to to to to M say tell you just this week on a T ends with a question you know question is how do we exist if hasem is here how can we be here brings a mus P G from the of the sun within the sun b the sheem says the not the parable is not is not like the moral cuz in the parable right the the sun ball is not here it's the it's it's the ray of the sun if the sun ball if the moer was here there would be no Ray but by by creatures by Creations we say the aish is here not like like the so have asked the question how can you that's the end of third chapter in ask would say like this how you heard this I don't remember learning it this way how can you hand the P we know the guide why don't we learn it learn it CU we're afraid you'll go to sleep with a question you wake up tomorrow not this cuz the question is better than the answer no Lees see what a question at the end of and to we finished our with what am I starting three and a half to four weeks right we follow the K system of so three weeks three four weeks hanging they're going to be with a why am I not why are we not afraid that they may won't come back to the class over you're questioning godes does exist and how do he to go to sleep with such a question and you don't have an answer before you go to sleep it's problematic what's the what's the question we don't exist how do we exist it's an Insight it's a into what is what this takes the person and he says who are you who are you after all with all of your accomplishments he says you're everything we have we have all thece is it's you that counts how do you reconcile the to this is what the does in especially and the first section talks about who are these individuals how are they real in our life the B what's a b you ask someone those a little forget I can't be come my father taught me in if you heard this the world made they you probably never heard wasn't but the B is the world's sad so it sounds very it sounds bad but has a different understanding what is yeah you walk away saying you learn I remember I taught when I was inas in California Marine County North of San Francisco a doctor was the head of the Pediatric a Kaiser hospital he came from Boston he had Russian parents he already wasn't from very he he like ding by he D in when he went there in Boston so and and um I learned with him T oneon-one after pay good base he says Rabbi I'm not coming any to learn and we were friends I say then why aren't you coming you know we have such a good time learning say Rabbi I I will never be a m at I'm not I'm not going to be a p I said why am I learning this it's it's it's it's a waste of uh time so this question was asked the famous he was also from Rand and he was a later in Paris in Bruna and he was a would be considered today AIC there's no question that people would give him pus not even a question this man would come in I heard this from people who saw it told me this 8:00 in the morning Yer go to a wall and stand on his feet all day till no how does one do that not St saying and facing the wall thinking about hasem daving so he had a nephew who said to him he said to I heard that called you a he asks Uncle so he says I was a little boy 10 years old today he's a friend of mine he says is it true uncle that the called you B is it true said this said like this what's he's careful with his thought speech and action there's a minute B there's a half an hour B in there's a 30 second B but during those 30 seconds right yeah we're not that oh but a 302 B that when a comes in that's not appropriate and you push it away and you want to speak you shut your mouth you close your mouth and you don't do something that's right are you going to do it tomorrow you'll deal with it tomorrow but right now if you can push off and be careful you are a 30C B yeah you know if you really want you can be right if you really want to be a b you can be a b otherwise if the B model of the balat is not for us it's a waste of of ink and we shouldn't be learning it and it's ridiculous say for for cl for all generations including this generation with the assimil all the issues we see Le the story I told you before I learned with this ye who had was belong to reformed Temple and Gish with garnish and today has a beer till poic right from learning slowly I'm not telling you facts now I'm not saying can't be this way I don't want anyone to walk it could but the T lends itself to these ideas so I really hope that we can make more and and and and talk it out Ando it out and develop but but but someone has to you know this doesn't come from you know you got you got to put time into it then not everyone has the time so what I would like to see the truth is and maybe there is but as far as I know there is and I told this to Y last time I'd like to see a one Shear in this whole area Lakewood and the Jackson and someone who gives a who gives a he talking about in English I know inish in English English speakers a lot of people no you can you can listen every day no problem I'll give you I'll give you the thing but you know that's fine but why why there should be someone in this area at least once a week better twice a week and that is created and M not not just you know you know no of every line you know and that and that that was something that I I thought would be something that if it could happen for I know I know about the the yish the yish why do I write in English why did I write these books in English I can write it Yiddish I know Yiddish probably as good as anyone else why do I write in English because we need to bring the TAA to English speakers the deepest parts of TOA like art scroll did and kust with and with and all that and yeah raan you know yeah they're plenty th millions of people are learning through through the I told you my friend how does he know that you don't put on in the morning because I'm because he read it in the back of the art SC poish help that we should we should Endeavor and you don't have to be a you don't have to be a rabbi and you don't have to be a every has an to to teach toate and today you guys know as well as me I may it better that there's no more of this you know you can you can teach this all over if you know what you're doing and you're a mench and you have yeah maybe you can't say it in B the B outside the B what's we have to change the Nam whatever what listen you know if the singing the that's not a but sing I don't know to me that's pretty interesting whatever it's just interesting what what's the what's the theat is the world has changed for the good and there is there's a of to to learn see this to fa this like this if you have this I don't mean I'm say not you know I have to rush out you have to rush out and and it creates a galite and it's not about becoming a [Music] it's I saw that when they learned the pece of Gora they were in seventh heaven you heard of a was the chief of of Montreal he wasn't from childhood and who and you know La say became I'm not sure about that but what he definitely became as a strong friend of the I saw this person encamp in Parksville New York a few times y you saw the way he spoke about when he started to he used to jump up and down Mish and his whole body shook from a in a piece of M just like that video of B in the Box yeah he that that that that's all you know I remind myself of another thing take care of yourself thank you you're welcome I remember I I was walking May walking up towards years ago and it was a hot day and I wanted to stin you know it's uphill it go up it goes uphill so there's a fi a little store I go in I have my shekel and I want to I say man and and and he the owner the store owner is talking and learning with another ye and I'm standing and I'm waiting and I'm waiting and favor tell me the thing I'll leave and he turns to me he says with a straight face I'm midle talking if you don't have time you could leave and he wasn't saying it I didn't feel out of arrogance speak of leaving we have the ride in 15 minutes okay good thank you so you you clocked me out no I remember I forget which year must be 77 78 7 one of those years and you know the first start by before and then taste right no one left in fact in the good years of the 70s you know 2 3 in the morning I was there and because I live in B Park ands and those days if you went on a train at night you were knifed you know you wouldn't come back alive yeah my mother my mother little my mother who a polar Survivor from the Holocaust from bar area she got into the car she drive my father had to get up 6 in the morning to go to work couldn't stay up so long my mother would get up or was up and would drive they home her kids and some of the friends to borrow part that she did anyway REM cooking up you shouldn't look at your watch if you're immersed in the in there's no watch there's no clock he was like but the has to get up to buy back the but is that what you there's no there's no V you know there's no V there's no all that exists is T So this in in May s with a straight face if you don't like that I'm sitting in talking go to another store when I will finish when we will finish learning the discussing then I'll give you see this teaches us how to come to these pation to these feelings how to develop them how to be able to reject what we call the Nish of the world especially today with the internet and everything else that we all you know we all benefit from it theage doesn't believe in you know shunning the internet to the you know of course there has to be rules and regulations and and times and everything you know but to say that it's a k that's a TR K that's not the and we're not going to we can discuss it another time the pros and cons and there's pretty a lot of cons okay and it least to be uh you know but if and if in a certain way and you belong to that community you're obligated to follow but B the was to use the for I you might mess up guess what when I was your age 17 18 whatever when I went out to help Eden put on in Manhattan on the tanks in the 70s Midtown Manhattan has thousands of people walking during lunch time other time s and some of them aren't dressed exactly so what does do what did I do you know what I did I didn't realize they were there not because I'm a b because I didn't know about these things and I'll never forget I'm not going to go into the details because it's too private but I was approached by a few people and they asked me things that I didn't know what they're talking about I did not know what they're talking about and I was regular boy who liked the baseball I was a New York Mets fan not a New York Yankees fan and I went to ball games and my grandfather who used to watch wrestling I used to watch wrestling with him but I learned very well and as I got older I got more into my learning we had a television at the house my mother my mother made an agree with my father she came from Costa Rica to Radio City she said you want to marry me I don't like your beard but I'll take you with your beard but you have to put a television in the house my father ran to his friends from ER Ro he said I like this girl but how can I marry her she wants a television that never spoke in 1956 bring the television now like bringing a a priest into the house so 4 years later 1960 he's dating this girl and she wants a television otherwise G you know my father's friends told him the most guys in 770 told my father my father wrote to the said talk to your friends about it and listen to your friends friend says take her but make a deal with her that you are responsible for the if she agrees that you're responsible for the you agree to let her television in the house father couldn't believe it with his bald head you know my father taught me three things as a ye no chip frontal hair you know you got to style your hair and my father was Zero not zero one you got to learn Alaba if you want to want to beab have to learn aaba and not not you want to you got go if there issues you work it out and the third thing he said was that you believe is those are the three ABCs kosher mik and shabas there's there's there's ABCs This is what I grew up with those are three things and he got it from his right so this he would eat PES pes's coming hard boiled eggs potatoes and Maes that's what he ate when he got married he was so FR nothing else and here is marrying a girl who wants to have a television in her house he agreed and bem I think the results speak for themselves right so so the re the rebba saw a bigger picture that saw a bigger picture a very big picture he saw that the yish kite of the 40s 50s and 60s needs an expansion so the old the old gers and the old folks and the Old Guard in the Old Country they couldn't relate to this and that's why you had Saka and other you know what that with a bent down hat where is he Str by the way I asked someone he's already probably memb he fought in three Wars used to learn I said to him [Music] he said to me you know that I asked that every once on the steps of 77 why don't you wear he confronted the on the steps and the looked said had to the she didn't give it to the said that's why I didn't we that's what he said so I'm telling you what he told me and I'm repeating although say could you imagine that with and I I do believe that if he would if he would be given Theo he would have worn the I'm convinced at the time but he he didn't so the point is that you could look at this as modernity goes to his university which rather went to University never he didn't go for a PhD like salvation did but he went for engineering but he had to take courses how do you Berlin 1929 was in intellectualism [Music] Ines and guess what I revealed this in my book in hutner I believe that the was the one who convinced RAB hutter to leave Berlin he was only there for four months you won't find this in his daughter's br's uh biography of Father she omitted it but I found it out four months was there four months and I I don't have concrete proof but I it points to that the re was the one cuz he knew him there and they were friends he told them he wasn't married this is not a place for you he was very Bri was going and he liked he liked to know new things you know four months and leave and he left and he left so in University even so Sal told must you know he speaks at theu online he a very good friend of mine good friend I mean he's older but he's Endor some of my books so he told me that in 1967 he lost his brother scho thereof he lost his mother and he lost his wife Tanya so by one the re didn't come and he was first set the said I think Gordon Jacobson maybe someone else and was in the house when they left the Shiva turned to he told this himself he said is refering to after the three in Berlin I was a student and he was a enough said you don't need you don't it doesn't mean that he was not from of course he was from but a student a student is a student in a university getting a PhD in philosophy which you got this isab Sal told me this so you're talking about a different type of but the world doesn't understand that because it doesn't fit the script or doesn't go to university it doesn't make any sense so when you understand the background and when you look at the bigger picture and you see what was accomplished the proof is in the pudding and said with the girl was concerned that and on and on and on okay he says okay I can understand your concern but look at the result so yes you were concerned now it's unfair it now it's been proven help that we should get together more often more often and learn more and and together and have only good heal that everyone needs and we and um to know that there's an address once drove him to m in middle of the ride I was very close to him that's why I wrote three books about him in middle of driving this was to an event in M where kender's son and others came and the Yesa we Hada then and we made a and I asked him to come and he came so middle of the road on the palace Saints he turns to me and he says to me and I'm driving I said I have to look at the road V what are you talking about he says come this was already after gim thas thousands of come to New York to 770 to kronites forti what are they coming for the re has passed away it's not here where they coming from so this is his line he had Shar lines address they know that here is the address he is here he's not here you could see him you can't see him you could makes no difference here is the address of here in in in Lakewood years ago 150 lers there BG and he was he was a Russian was a season from so he turns them and he says you think I'm talking so that you should become the barites and and and you should come to 770 he says we have enough la7 you don't need to become aage but he said if you want to see come to 770 it help we have enough our own we don't need more but that's we have enough of our own extension go to7 I was there one year against the wall like this how I got out I don't know against the wall gasping for air can listen give a look at this check him out you want to see a real who not you can't blackmail him with money and with honor and with cover with Al told the lers for that come to 770 but not that we need another another we have enough of our own it's not about you know my M my party your party it's about finding a that brings you closer to the ab that's all and if someone has it through a gole God bless you and someone has through God bless you no problem the what they what they teach and and what he taught and how he he you can't you can't imagine you know how we became from nothing to two two my father always says when my father went to yes and he started to learn so he he says my father this is from the old country and he was still he never landed so he says father what do you mean he says because my father started to become more able more refined it was got into learning he said if this that you became part of can make you into a stickle mench is aggressively he's greater than the there's a lot of Truth to that there's a lot of Truth he made us into Di menion made us you know regular guys regular people baseball Boys Frank Footers and all of a sudden he took the Frank footer boys and the baseball guys and he and he elevated them and he and he and he taught them and he and he and he brought out this help another ye help another ye you don't have to be a with a degree and you have to be on the list look at abph he's a businessman look what look what he's do I'm saying there not the T just to bring out the you don't need to be on a list and get accolades from the head office you know what you need to do it comes the P he calls up dolphin come out make a an hour two three you don't you don't need you don't need accolades and instilled this in every single ye you know an Al Teach an Al you know a b teach a b you know atile teach you can make a make a you know a n sing a [ __ ] there's no excuse for not sharing should help that we should keep on sharing we should be have you know freedom I was telling my today what type of what are you going to think about this P I said take one indan just one one thing that you feel you're enslaved to you're stuck you're stuck in the r and work on that this P that if you can come out after p with feeling more free in that particular area you had P you had yeah you had you don't worry about the G of course we need Masia that bottom line but make a person the says the before he speaks about the G he says your in inner struggles and he broke down crying when he said it the you want to redeem the world redeem yourself first you can't redeem the world if you didn't redeem yourself why because the world the world needs a redeemer and if you're not if you're not in the Redemption mode if you're not in g mode how can you expect someone else to to be n that a should look to to be what what did he want with this mashia you know really what didn't know about before is a small change for you what did he want over here he made a story he tells the reporter sound like you can see it right see they say I'm like like I don't like the Youth of Obsessed the English word obsessed what did he want over here taught me every word from the re has a meaning this isn't just you know he said and it means nothing or it's a joke no it's not such a thing not not only because aad and every word ofad is K but the was a very serious person a serious thinker he so when he tells he tells a CNN reporter that I'm obsessed about Mia and that's what you should write about and talk about there we have to then what does that mean to us does it mean you should just place a run around for some maybe it means that but for many it doesn't mean that so what does it mean it means you should pil on yourself a as the re said in the first become n become free and when you're free you can free someone else the the living example is what at the end of the day he his message is become a of God of be the embodiment of God you say what do you mean I'm I'm a mortal I'm a human being the Gars I have mistakes and problems and issues how can I be how can I be a Godly representative is key an IS key if I would know I would you will be a Godly person not El if If I Were a Rich Man not you if you were you will be a rich man learn see this it opens up the channels it starts flowing and I'm telling you everyone is I've been in situations I have to go already you can stay all night tell him to come in tell him to come in for a few minutes no ask him to come in just a few minutes the driver what is it an Uber ask him to come in the the the we walk around saying you know by the literature right what do they say say you become inab we don't have such language but but but in inab if you if you if you learn and you work withus you can you become more you become more refined you really do you really do everyone you know everyone to his level and then it's contagious people like to be around refined people happy people you know you come into a room and you're all no one wants to be around you come into a room and and then you sing and you say and you say it's it's it's there's a word in English called it's a cathartic experience you know what cathartic means it wipes you it washes you out and all of a sudden you're someone else you're someone else says that that happens through what called spiritual pration I'm not talking about that levels talking about P it's not the same person just like told I told you the story before right they go back and get what you left why cuz you're that wasn't just a joke it wasn't just it's a em when you learn the EM you're not the same person that's all we need to do is to learn little to learn a little more what do they say what do they say three things right um if you have money and it hasn't messed you up you need more money and you're still not a man is is is very positive today they you know use the language the self-improvement language very positive very upbeat such language right see this has it and I must say that I don't know why it's this way when I was 14 15 years old I was in the mikah bar Park before they built every block of mikah we had one mikah 46 between 14th and 13th for those from Bar Park know I think that was once in that mik I'm come out I'm a young B I'm washing my hands and another standing next to me so I'm a little troublemaker so I said to him did you this I said do you know what the T Fus are he says what 10 no I didn't talking about you're you have a re you don't know the 10 fers are and you're my age 17 16 18 whatever I learned someone good friend he says he wants to learn doesn't want he doesn't want to learn T I said no problem let's learn this stop Le it's he says uh you got skip this okay more have to skip this that's page skip this I can't with you because the mentions some you have to skip and Skip that's the way I was taught well I wasn't told that we need you asked see this not was he's right he's not teaching he's teaching he's when he went to to Belgium over there shii over there he told me that they said they want to learn so they give us they were there for four or five hours and they said listen we never learned like this atate in in other words this is my V need to learn seriously you don't want to learn learn but learn and learn and not skip I can't Lear with you anymore I can't you skipping you know now this goes back to that's that's the past and everyone can think think famous right I'm telling you some things to here that are under the cover okay so you don't have to go publicizing and B&G they brought they brought they brought him they brought him um the and they asked what does he say a look and he said good to by I'm paraphrasing by us we put the emphasis not just not to speak don't think that's much harder so for the first thing you have does not speak but the emphasis that's why doesn't participate the campaigns of of Silence it's not that they're against you know have something against campaigns of Silence but the focus was a I remember I gave a sheare in Los Angeles to a group of people 50 60 people in the room many women and and one says I want to stop talking to my friend CU whenever I talk to my friend I speak I said stop talking why don't you elevate your conversation talk about sophisticated things more things that are more spiritual nature of course when you talk about this one said this and that one said this so puts in a different place okay listen we have to leave some conversation for another time that should be and it's it's a day to connect to the or your own house if you give a then you'll be all right