#5 Marin County, CA, hot tubs & weed, Rebbe's instructions - Rabbi Chaim Dalfin

so in walked another congregant of mine when I was a rabbi guess where a place called Marin County California no the older here you were in Marin near Berkeley right Berkeley is in the East and this is North so y Gordon at the time was known as Peter Gordon came with his wife and became part of our kabad house he's been here for years married off I think you have two children we have four children three are married so great great the the Reb's arbit the Reb's work it continues big time Big Time and when you sit next to a Gordon on one side that Mor on the other side the Rafal Eisenberg and you know you see the Reba's work you see the Reba's work so it's y Kipper in a few days for a few moments I want to tell you a little bit about Marin County and the connection to Y Kipper so Marin County was depicted in a 1970 documentary in the following way are you ready it was the hot tub capital of the United States while you're smoking dope weed so I recall someone living in one of those cities who says to me a former New Yorker arguing about TOA and this and he knows better than the rabbi what is he doing he is raising pigs in his backyard with a hot tub and a cucko theing county was really Counter Culture but in a sophisticated way the now Berkeley was the radicals Frisco San Francisco we know what it what it was and is Marin as we say in yish there's a word I want you the English speakers to learn this word mention how would you say in English a good way best a mention I mean the little translation is better people but it's not a good best not you know the sophisticated people sophisticated people so the but the type of people there were intelligent had good jobs I think per capita in those years it was the per capita was like one of the wealthiest places in America per capita all over you know the generally the whole County the secularism was very great I come to bin County July of 1984 the send be there was giving out and bottles to those that were going I was just married I got married four months before another in Melbourne Australia my wife's in Melbourne and two and a half weeks later I wanted to be at the P I slept her away in hindsight there was a treasure Trove of that I could have spent days weeks and months but you're young everything has to be now you got to get back to New York the re for bringing in two weeks so I her back to New York I make bring comes that ever finishes 2: 3 in the morning forget and there long lines and we live the block away on Aly a corner where there's a bank now an Apple Bank on top sh Gordon owned the building at the time and a friend had relased it and I subl it from him and a block away 70 so I say to to to my wife re finish my bring it I'll come home talking about you know she's an new married woman by night it's not the best of neighborhoods you know and I'll go back to to get K will give a bottle that will take to Marine County to give out to the people and make a Lo behold by the time I got back the finished already giving Al it was a very quick an hour an hour and half and I came back two hours later boy did I feel I felt so bad going a is another few weeks so I went to r i growner the next day and I said for grown you got to save me please ask that de would you mind asking if he'll give me a bottle said I I'll ask I can't I don't know what it'll be it calls me the next day that e is sent out from his cup he poured in from his cup into your bottle and here's the bottle so not only did I get a bottle I got a bottle with the Reb's wine in it okay now come to to Marine County there were 19,000 Jews on the federationist you know what is aabad Rabbi comes out to a little to a federationist that had something to work with lucky I had a federation list right you're smiling you know you know what I'm talking about you live there so I saw an ad listen to this that a friend of mine he's a little older Barry shiman Rabbi shiman of Chicago I came across a flyer it had his picture on it and next to it it had enlarged words I am not reformed I am not conservative I am not Orthodox and then I am kabad I am kabad I am kabad I am kabad and then the philosophy kabad loves every and I said this is the flyer that I'm going to use to introduce myself to Marin County the best message but wait and I went I printed up 5,000 cards this is before your time it's hook you weren't you didn't come yet nice cards and card stock and I was going to do a mailing cuz 19,000 people 5,000 cars just 19,000 people 5,000 families whatever but you know someone who works for the re you send in so I sent in this card to the re before I sent it in the mail to the to the people a few hours went by and either RAB Groner or reab kleene one of the Reb secretaries calls me he says the Reb has given an answer to your so what I was expect wow is giving me a for doing this great thing he faxes into my office the answer it was like a 10 line answer it wasn't just an askar you know and basically the Reb says like this I I don't remember the exact theb says pretty much says I'm I'm translating in English the the the message that you're trying to convey is that we're all one Jewish people and kabad stands for one Jewish people right no differences so the the headline of your flyer contradicts that by saying I I am not this and I am not this and I am not that by default you're saying there is reformed conservative and Orthodox so your message contradicts the title then theba says and if this message is even necessary those I remember it's enough it's adequate to share this in words not on not a writing and then the ended off I believe with a very sharp answer sharp words and the good Lord may he forgive you very sharp I took the 5,000 cards I remember my garbage my little garbage K dumped him in spent the money it ain't going out Z that's it the is EMS and EMS knows this one Gish of people and everything else is not important and it in fact can be a contradiction to the message y Kipper and the Al and the in the explain what is yipper if you have to if you have to ask what is y Kipper about forgiveness says an Insight that puts it 180 degre spin about you're coming face to face with god with Hashem and the purification comes from that experience and that reality in other words Yumer is not just about forgiveness anding Al Yumer is about the relationship withes in the most pure sense which is beyond transgression can you can you transgress against your self well you say yeah sure you can abuse yourself and do it every day don't you see this says yeah that's when it comes to the physical limited experiences that we deal with you can never damage in its Quint essential truth the the sh before I got married I learned in La by in the from 81 to 83 I'll never forget it was one evening a Wednesday or Thursday probably Thursday we were up most of the night someone comes running in so we asked him where you coming from I'm coming from Vegas what are you do in Vegas oh I got into a car and I drove very fast to get to LA because I was being chased by someone who wanted to kill me okay and he told me why I don't want I'm going into it right now and I saw a synagogue on third in laa at that time was the rabbi then that's where he had a Sho and he happened to go in and afteri was there after sees he doesn't know from Al B and he's running away someone's trying to kill him after he says go to the Yesa he sends him to us the next thing is he was learning with CIT in his program CIT is also a bron sport yeah he is a bronx sport so the the is beyond spiritual contamination you know like they say uh the baptismals sprinkle this way sprinkle this way the chicken is a chicken it ain't changing a all the all the nonsense all the ridiculous things that we experience in life can't change is around the corner what's the what do we to involve our is getting to our real self the quential aspect of being a ye and that's what the said to me and why did he do I know why but surmising may the good Lord May hasem forgive you I am dolphin you have it all wrong what are you teaching people in Marine County I'm not reform I'm not conser I'm not Orthodox I'm that's not with that's not Essence so everyone here everyone here whether you're this or you're that that this and that is secondary and ancillary where yeen and when we go with this n when we go with this point you become happy you become successful you you thrive not like Alan dtz wrote the surviving American Jew or Jewish American we are the thriving American children we thrive theba thrive theba didn't just survive you kite was surviving till the came along and he changed the whole face of kind of Judaism Bist you know I spend time and I write about other communities many of them like someone mentioned mentioned saer and Lakewood and me and P andas and any Community you want I wrote about probably they're all beloved they're all holy and as fall says in B Park it's B beautiful beautiful get with leich you get with kabad when you get with kabad is This n That is here to share with the whole world and it's happening it's happening more and more I'm in touch with people in tin New Jersey which is you know the Bastion of modern Orthodoxy making a people are learning to see this is a revolution happening before our eyes bems but Ros fall and I were growing up there's a lot of lot of challenges a lot of obstacles in these areas today a lot most of it is gone no one's fighting and no one is putting obstacles do whatever you can really it's a different period they help and in this special day few days before that we take a few moments of serious thought and and one more you know there's a lot of doing on Ripper Big M and by the way our daving I don't know what time you guys started in Pittsburgh our Sho starts 9:30 and we finish 2 and I was told that the women section was full I said what's the because they asked me how many you have my wife my daughter BL blah what's what's the question we have a lot of we Lish girls are coming to DAV and laich why because they don't want to Domin in their shoes it's too long that's what I was told so the babage has this you know late in early out you know but there still a lot of D it's better to say a paragraph with kav than 20 without kavana there's no rush where you going where are you going to a little don't we don't need so there's nowhere to go anyway take your time Focus put your Talis over your head those that wear Talis think about your life where am I where do I want to be where are my children where are my grandchildren you know it's it's it's crunch time it's young Kipper it's crunch time this isn't a joke I mean if it's a joke then give it up and it's not a joke it's you keres they were hies they didn't go to sleep the 770 I remember would especially some would sleep on the benches sleep they would fall asleep on a bench y Kipper okay we go to sleep we need the to sleep fine but nevertheless you know so she keep it a few days it's a big M take your time nowhere to rush no one can tell you I need you home at 1:00 the ch's burning say say because if you don't say then the Finish is quicker and maybe you want that it's fine I'll take a water okay give him water water but something right two