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is it appropriate for a husband to snap his fingers in front of lots of people to get his wife's attention my husband did it once and he told me it won't happen again he admitted it was wrong but how can I be sure it won't happen again great question this is something you really have to bring up with your spouse this is where trust comes in as spouses as human beings we are all work in progress we all make mistakes we're not seeking Perfection we're seeking accountability we need to be able to cultivate trust towards each other so that if you hurt me or I hurt you we can talk about it respectfully and kindly make amends apologize make a commitment that in the future I will be much more considerate and much more sensitive if you really don't have that trust that your spouse is serious and authentic we have to go back to the Baseline and see what is undermining our trust and address it