Three Boys Killed in Ukrainian Plane Crash

the Yeshiva.net And here in Monsey it's still morning or afternoon, early afternoon. I know most of you are in Eretz Yisrael, so good evening to you. It's already the second day of Rosh Chodesh Av. And uh Reb Moshe Tzvi who I know is behind the whole chaburah in the Mir reached out to me a few days ago after the terrible terrible tragedy and asked if I could if I could blay with you chevreh a little bit via Zoom. So even though we're berich makom gashmi but bikiruv makom ruchni. I also know that we have here some of the family members, some of the parents or other family members of the three precious boys who were killed. So first and foremost I just together with all of Klal Yisrael and all of our brothers and sisters in Eretz Yisrael and the whole world want to express our words of condolences and comfort and nichumim to the parents, to the brothers, to the sisters, to all of the krovim, all of the family members, zaydes, bubbies, uncles, aunts, cousins, and of course the close friends for this devastating devastating tragedy that is still so fresh in everybody's mind. Just a little while after the plane crash. To the family of and the friends of Amram Fromowitz, zichrono livracha, here my landslide in in Monsey. To the family of Lazer Brill, zichrono livracha of Williamsburg, and of course to the family of Yisrael Tzvi Hershy Weiss of London. So, thank you all for gracing us here with your presence, and thank you too to Moshe Tzvi for arranging it, and thank you to all the bachurim for joining us. I know many of you are up north in Eretz Yisrael. So, uh Thank you for being here with us. Just a few points that I want to really make. Um you know, you probably heard a lot over the last week, and probably you're already sick and tired of speeches and of drashas. I'm speaking in English just cuz I know there's a different type of cuz we have from England, and then we have from Eretz Yisrael, and we have from New York, and from different parts of America. So, I'm speaking in English uh so I hope everybody will be able to understand that. If I could have it in Yiddish, but I think maybe English would be a little better because I don't know exactly who's on our group, and I want everybody certainly to be able to understand. So, the first thing I want to share with all of you, tired bachurim, is that you know, you all experienced a deep wound. I remember when I was 14 years old, a little younger than you guys, I was in a van accident in camp in the summer, and one of my very close friends was killed. We were only 14 years old, 1 year after my mitzvah. It was a van that went from camp. We went on our trip, amusement park, and on the way home, the van fell off a cliff, and this boy a very close friend of mine I grew up with him. His name was Label Khan. He was killed it was base of Tisha B'Av. Right before Tisha B'Av 1986. And uh you know till today it's been a lot of years Tisha B'Av is what? None of of summer of I and of It's 35 years little 35 years this year. But I always remember that. And when I go to the cemetery sometimes when I visit his grave which I did a week or two ago when I was there Montefiore Cemetery in Queens you know I stand there at his matzeva I say a couple of till him. And it's been 35 years but I think to myself he was only 14 when he was killed 14. We all his classmates grew up. Most of us got married built families. And you know you wonder why why these things happen why he life was cut when he was 14. And of course there's really no answer to any of these we don't have answers to these questions. These are the mysteries the mysteries of every neshama that comes down and has its journey that it takes the family it's born to parents that raise it who raise it brothers and sisters the yeshivas the schools they go to the places they end up in the journeys they take the unique personalities that they have and then the time that the Rebono shel Olam takes their neshama back. It says Vayipach b'apav nishmas chayim. Hashem blew a neshama into Adam and into every person. Basically birth is Hashem exhaling and death is Hashem inhaling. He takes back that neshama back to him. But who understands? Wer kann verstehen? The mysteries of every neshama, of every journey, of every life, of every soul. We just stand in awe and in pain to such an experience. Now here it's not just one of your friends, it's three of your friends. And Reb Moishe Itzchok was telling me earlier about the character of these three boys. Amram, Laser, and Hershy. Amram Fromer Woods, Laser Brill, and Hershy Weiss. How beloved they were. How lebedik. He told me how normal they were. I guess in today's world that's a chiddush, right? How balanced, how friendly, how integrated, and how lovable all of them were. Each in their own way. And how close they were with all of you, chaveirim. And of course with their families. It's a devastating tragedy, and this is a wound that doesn't heal. People say, "You get over it." Some people don't get over it. It's a wound that stays. It's a very deep wound, especially those of you who are sensitive and those of you who are very loving. These are very, very deep wounds. And it's important to acknowledge that. It's not a small story. This is a very, very deep wound. And even when we have a moment and we have tochus and we have hope and we give each other chizuk, but it's important to acknowledge that the pain is very powerful and don't judge it. Don't judge any emotions that you're having. You know, feel comfortable to cry and feel comfortable to laugh. And feel comfortable to cry to each other and feel comfortable to express your emotions. You don't have to hold it in. Cuz it's very, very, very difficult to lose a loved one at such a young age, 19 years old, 20 years old, under such circumstances, in Ukraine, in an airplane. They were going to you know, enjoy the the scenery a little bit, enjoy some adventures in life. And such a such a such a catastrophe. Such a tragedy. It's really very, very hard to digest. I'm sure some of you wake up in the morning and you think, "Oh, it's just a bad dream. It's a bad joke." And soon you'll get a call or a text. And they're fine and they're just having a good time and this was color war. But sadly, it wasn't color war. Or bog war. And it wasn't just a sad joke, funny, weird, sad, dark joke. It's part of reality. So, the first thing I want to tell all of you is, honor your emotions. Respect the fact that this is a difficult time. It's not an easy time. You're going through pain and you don't have to be embarrassed by it. And you don't have to judge it. You don't have to criticize it. You don't have to tell yourself, if I would be a more air local Boca as a whole than my citizen Boca as a whole given I guess it either the sham as a whole given I guess it a masculine or the God made a minute. Don't don't do that. Don't judge yourself. Respect whatever emotions come up. There's a mission in Sanhedrin. A mission of Sanhedrin. Some of you may have learned it. Even somebody, somebody who was killed by Bezden and there's no shiva. There's no shiva. There's no regular availables. Because there's Mrs. Bezden. It's a mission of Sanhedrin. The missioner says, the missioner says, that you can't tell the family not to grieve. Nish to clog and nish to try it and chain on in us a little bit of life. Because it's in the heart. Can't tell somebody what to feel, what not to feel. They'll say it Yiddish, the heart's heart in the inner Allah. The heart has its own Allah, which which means the heart's for naive thoughts. And that's Alpi Toyda. Toyda tells us that we feel, we experience, and we experience deep pain, and we can't deny that. So, that's number one. Respect your emotions. And not only today, tomorrow, and next week, and next month. You know, things will come up, especially just the parents here. You're going to go into your You're going to your son's bedroom. You sit at the Shabbos table. Yom Tov comes up, Shabbos comes up, milestones of the family comes up, and a flood of tears comes raging out of your system, flowing out of your neshama, out of your heart, out of your mind, because all these milestones in life bring up, and they trigger all these warm and sweet memories. And sometimes little things, you know, you see a shirt or a pair of socks, or you have a memory, or you see a picture, or you see a video, you see a telephone number in your phone, you see a telephone number, and it brings it all up. And that's part of that part of it. We have to respect it and not judge it. Not judge it. Do not judge it. There's also a second point I want to say, and that's the mystery of it. These are things we cannot wrap our brain around. We You know, we try to understand life. We like to understand things. Especially Yeshiva Bochurim are trained to think. Good for standing the Mishnah, and good for standing the Sugya, and good for standing the Gemara, and good for standing the Tosfos, and good for standing Rashi, and the Ran, and the Rashba, and the Ramban, and the Rabbi Akiva Eiger, and the Maharsham, Shif, and the Zichron Meir, good for standing Chidushei Rab Nachum, Chidushei Rab Chaim. You have to have to good for standing. Our Yeshiva Bochur will for standing. And there are those things that we could understand, at least according to our ability, and we try to understand them. But there's also things that we just don't understand. You know the secrets of the world. The secrets of Torah. There are some great minds and great and some of them are known to them. But the secrets of the world There are some people know, not many, but there are people who know the secrets of but the secrets of the world Only you know the secrets of the This is something that completely completely transcends our limited Yes. We learn lessons from it and we all look into our lives. And we all hold life much more precious. Like the says in when something happens we should always go internally and learn from it in any way possible. But we still understand that whatever we understand is really meaningless relative to the truth of it. The truth of it is infinite. It's inside. We can't understand inside. Our brains can understand what goes into our brain. You can't expect that a four-year-old boy will go into the or Yeshiva in the in the of the world and understand the is four-year-old boy. Barely knows the language. Sometimes even an 18-year-old boy or 19-year-old boy doesn't understand what the Yeshiva said. I don't mean your but I mean it's sometimes other habburahs, or other shiur. And that's only a boy in a yeshiva, and maybe one day this boy will be greater than the yeshiva. The difference between them is a few years, and it's a limited difference. Still, you don't expect that your 3-year-old or 4-year-old brother or sister should go into the shiur of a gone alum and understand what he's saying. It's not fair. They're going to tell you it's boring, it doesn't make sense. But that's only a limited difference. When you're talking about a human being, a bust of a dum, whose brains was created by Hashem, and you want the creation to understand the creator, it's impossible. It's impossible. That would be like saying that this mic should understand the one who created it. What's fascinating there? Even if he could understand something, we have brains, our brains can understand a lot of things, and it's an amazing gift. But we have to understand that you're dealing here with infinity, ain soif mamash. Something that completely transcends our capabilities, and it's important to respect that. To know and understand that we really don't understand. And don't Let's not make it small, let's not reduce it to something that we can comprehend. We could stand in awe and mystery of something that I simply cannot comprehend. It's above me, it's beyond me. And what does it trigger in me? It triggers in me awe, mystery, pain, tears, and grief. A lot of grief. This is a time of It's a shiva spite. It's a time of It's a time of grief, it's a time of mourning for these boys. In halakha, there's shloshim of pain, there's shiva of hesped, there's shloshim. And there's different stages. There's different stages. And each stage, the Torah acknowledges that we have to respect all the experiences that we go through. I want to say something else. I want to make another point about this. And that is It's important to be able to understand that sometimes people don't understand what you're going through. And they make comments that are insensitive. I'm saying this post both to the friends and to the family members. You know, sometimes people will tell you, "Just go on. Just go on. You know, the neshama is in a good place." True, the neshama is in a good place. Neshama is in olam ha'emes. But somebody just tells you to just go on, you know, move on with life. And you feeling that they really don't understand you. And you know what? Some people really will not understand. They may mean well, but they just don't understand. I'm sure over shiva there were comments made. Some people make wise comments. Some people are even wiser, so they're quiet. And some people say sometimes things that are best of It feels like it came out of chelem. You'll forgive me. I'm laughing cuz something's funny, you know. The people mean well. Yisrael rachmanim rachmanim baishanim gam l'chasadim. But like somebody once said, Yidden zaynen am chacham venavon. If the am chacham venavon will know the hata b'tzel ha'seichel, right? Sometimes you can be chachamim um venavonim. But people don't always know what to say. So, it's important to know that sometimes people say the wrong things. And you have to be honest with who you are and what you need. Which brings me to the next point. It's so important to have a support system, people who support you. Bachurim, chaverim, talk to each other, farbreng with each other. If you need a support system, get it. Some people maybe not don't need it, but if you need it, don't be embarrassed. Whether it's a friend, whether it's a mashpia, whether it's a rosh yeshiva, whether it's a therapist, whether it's a psychiatrist, whether it's a psychotherapist, whether it's a coach, whether it's a confidant, whether it's a rosh kabira, mechanech, rosh yeshiva, whatever it is. But if you need a few people maybe, but don't feel bad that you need a support system. This is a very serious journey and this is a time that everybody needs the and the is up to be able to deal with it. It's very very hard. It's very difficult. You're not the only one, trust me. These are difficult difficult experiences and we're living today in a time when there's a lot going on and people are very sensitive and the people sometimes think, you know, are not sensitive. But you know that you are sensitive. You know, people sometimes think they're strong, they're macho, you know. Start to like Yeah, is that like that and get the what makes you have a lot of them about the camera and I can't get emotional but I will leave for the but you're also very sensitive. You're sensitive people. You have hearts, you have souls. And therefore you take it in. So it's important if you need a support system to get that support system. You say, "Yeah, but it's over, it's already 2 weeks, it's a week, it's 2 weeks, you know, it's time to move on." You know, if it's been and it's finishing, we're going back to it soon to come to you. So come to you. But the pain is there. The pain is still in the heart. So when you need a support system, that's that's completely fine, respect it. I want to say something else and that is to the boys or the it's very important for you to be here for each other. I know that the last week or two you really were here for each other. You became united like family because many of you were in Ukraine and I know more than 40 boys went to Ukraine and were there or were around the area where the tragedy happened. Some of you were not there. But the last 2 weeks really united you very very deeply. And I'm asking you and suggesting to you keep up that unity because the the people with them and the money service come together is what allows people to go through pain. Be here for each other. It's together. That's together. That's I would be together. I would be together. Yeah, and like the famous word by Anna told somebody is what's coming out coming coming out coming In other words, let me tell you something. No two people grieve in the same way. Other people don't make jokes. They get very serious. The fact is every person wants to live in a family. Every brother, every sister, every parent. What the father experiences is not what the mother experiences. Yes, we're all in the same ocean, but we're not all in the same boat. We're all in the same storm, but we're not all in the same boat. Some people's boats float this way, and some people's boats float this way. And you have to respect that. You may have a brother, a friend who grieves differently. They have different experiences. They like to be more humorous, or they like to be more emotional, they like to be more dramatic, or they cry more, they cry less, or they like telling stories. That's fine. Respect your own emotions, and respect other people's emotions. It's perfectly fine. But the most important thing is to be united. The community should be united to be able to be each other, to be able to be here for each other, and not to judge. Really, don't judge each other. It's a very, very vulnerable time. Give people the respect to be able to um to be able to experience this in their own unique and individual way because every person has their shlichus and their personality and their seichel and their middos. There's another point, I think another very important point that I would like to make about this. And that is moving on, moving on doesn't mean we forget. Moving on in life doesn't mean you forget about what happened, you make believe it never happened, it was a plague, a crash, nishka, let's go on, we're going back to the zman, we're going back to the mirror, we're going to start the new zman with a new chiyus, with a highest chiyus as though it never happened. That's cruel, that's not fair, it's not true. Of course it happened. Until the rest And for the rest of your life you're going to remember that it happened. And let me tell you something. One day you're going to lead your daughter to the chuppah, it's going to be many years from now. And you're going to remember your friend, I'm telling you. You're going to remember. You're going to remember them in very interesting times. These things we don't forget, especially those who were really close to them and really loved them. Moving on does not mean you forget, you don't forget anything. Moving on means you remember. And a part of you is broken. And a part of you cries. And a part of you will miss them forever. Till your last breath. Yeah. That's how it is. You don't tell a mother and a father never forget a child. And a brother and a sister don't forget a brother and sister. And a good friend doesn't forget a good friend. What happens is you learn that despite the pain together with the pain we each and every single one of us has a mission of why our neshama is here. Their mission was completed. Why, how it happened, I don't know. But each one of us has our mission to bring in light and love and beauty and holiness into the world. And that mission continues. And here, I want to speak a little bit about guilt. I know that some of you have guilt. Why them? Why not me? Why did this happen when they took the journey in the airplane, not when we took a journey? We did the same thing a day before or an hour before. But we also wanted to have fun in the skies. Also, people feel guilty because so many things happened. You know, this the worked out this way, worked out that way. And it's called survivor's guilt. It's a very, very normal thing. It's a very normal thing. It's a beautiful, beautiful vort in the beautiful vort, beautiful vort in the area. I I I I I says like this. Some of the will appreciate it. The says about that base. I don't know which you learned this year. But you may have learned this. What is base? It's been if two people are going on a hike with a canteen of water and one of their canteens empty and the only other person has water and there's only enough water for him to survive. He can't share it with his friend because if he shares it with his friend, they'll both die. There's not enough water for both of them. So, either he gives it to his friend and he dies or he drinks it himself and his friend dies from thirst. Now, you'll ask me a question, why didn't they take along their phones on the hike? This is a good you'll figure that out in your shiva. You'll ask why they didn't they along their phones. But in any case, what's that look at? What do you do? So Ben Petura says, I'll eat him a massage of you can't watch another Jew die after the share the water with him. I shall be a keeper. When I become a good of a keeper in March. In it says your brother should live with you higher in your life comes first. Give your brother life with you. You have to first make sure you're alive. So by giving him water, you're not going to live. There's no you. If you want to give him the water and let him live find you good something. But you can keep the water for yourself and you live. Good give all the I'm sure they I'm sure they go to the still to the condition your dollar yesterday special. Which is and from there you learn that what? You have to treat just like you treat yourself whatever you have he has to have it and if you don't have it he doesn't have it you can't have it either. If you have another there's one piece of sushi that Evan gets it. So here we you come first and over there we come first. And I'm sure you give four answers. But it's not for this year those of you who want could look up the afterwards to the center ship. I'll send it to the center but this is special. Ask if you are in the world of cash. Why don't you want to say I like Ben Petura and Ben Petura like you have in the whole of you and Ben Petura and Ben Petura and Ben Petura. I shall be a keeper. Who is a keeper keeper? Who is a keeper keeper? NO YOU DON'T TAKE IT FOR YOURSELF. WHO IS A MASTER? Nobody answers. I feel like a fellow. The master says I am a walker. Nobody can argue with Ben Petura. You know why? The yesod of all the tanoim and amoraim is emes. It's never about an agenda, my agenda, "I will." It's about emes, Torah is emes. Here is the problem. Ben Petura said, "Share the canteen of water with your friend so that he will drink and you will drink, even though you both die." Anybody who argues with Ben Petura, there was a chashash that they negate the Torah. over Because if it happens to them, maybe they don't want to share the canteen cuz they want to live. I want to live. I don't want to die. So, we're not sure if their shita is coming from emes or it's coming because I have a negiya, because I have a bias, cuz I'm a shochat. Akiva bar Akiva Basically, coming from Akiva. Who's Akiva? Akiva says in Brachos "Am ha'aretz and ba'alei batim." When the Romans were killing him, Akiva circle was part of my circle. He was saying "Baruch atah Adonai." He was saying Shema Yisrael. "I'm going to let them in the garden." So, Akiva said, "Kol yomai my entire life I used to think that I would say "Baruch My whole life I wanted to experience mesirus nefesh. Now that I have an opportunity, you don't want me to grab it?" Says the Kedushas Levi. Akiva's whole life was "I will listen to mesirus nefesh." When he said "Chayaicha ko'amanin" you could trust him. This is emes. This is not coming from shochat. Akiva loves the world. He loves olam hazeh. He He wants another day in this world. Akiva's whole life was "MOSER YOM L'YOM YODI'A DA'AT." WHEN Akiva said "Chayaicha ko'amanin" you could trust him. That this is Torah emes. Akiva didn't say "Chayaicha ko'amanin" because he was selfish, because he wanted to hold on to his guf, to his physical life. Akiva said "Chayaicha ko'amanin" because that's what wants and that's the halakha. The halakha is Why am I saying this to you? I'm saying this to you because sometimes we have guilt. And we have to realize what is Rebbe Akiva saying? Rebbe Akiva is saying if you were given the gift of life, it means that this is your divine Khulela to experience this guilt. The Ribono shel Olam still wants your soul here. So, why not those three souls? I don't know. I don't know. I don't know about a neshama, but you know about a neshama. We know we don't know why people die. We also don't know why people are born. It's not just we don't know why they die. We also don't know why they're born. You know why somebody was born, when they were born, for how long? You don't know this. All of life is a mystery. So, Rebbe Akiva says, "If you're alive, Khayekha Koidman, this is your mission. This is your This is your sacred divine opportunity." Not about being selfish like I'm alive, I get to eat cholent, I get to eat kugel, I get to eat I get to be in the mirror, I get to grow up. My parents get to have me. It's a normal feeling. It's a normal emotion, but realize this is not just about your selfishness. This is because you have a job in this world. I need to raise this kind of You have a mission to transform the world beginning with yourself to bring in light into this space. Every neshama has its unique Khulela. And with sensitivity and humility, it's important to respect that. I'm going to say one last point and then we're going to open up the floor to questions. My last point is this. There's a normal feeling and it's a normal feeling that it's becomes very uncomfortable with the families of those who were killed. The families of Amram and of Laser and of Heshy. but it's important for you Bachman to reach out to them. Send them letters, call them, the mothers, the fathers, share with them your memories. Because it's very very comforting for parents, for brothers and sisters to be able to have that connection. I know it's sometimes uncomfortable. I remember when my friend was killed in in in the class, nobody told us to us. You know, then the today the break down and therapist with psychologist with Rabbi why why to call you, but then you know, but this year get out there was tough shalom involved. Nobody was going to therapy, nothing. So we were very uncomfortable with the parents. Don't be uncomfortable with the parents. Talk to them. I'm telling you all of you, I know there's a of 70 80 in the mirror, especially those who are close, call up the father, call up the mother, write them a letter. Do both. And stay in contact. It mean it means a lot for them because you're there you you you were with their son, their sons, and you were close to their sons. It means a lot that means a lot. Tell them about the journey to Ukraine, tell them about the last days, tell them about the last year in the Yeshiva. I don't know how long you know them, but stay it means a lot for the family that you stay connected to them. Don't avoid them, don't be embarrassed, don't be awkward. I know it's hard. For some of us it's like uncomfortable. What am I going to say? What you don't have to say anything. Just show up, be present, just tell them that you're thinking about them and how difficult it's for them, you know how difficult it is and how difficult it is for you. And that means a lot to parents, it means a lot to siblings to stay to have that connection. So that's why I'm encouraging you to do it. At last I want to say to all of you tired of Bachman. We live in a very mysterious world. We live in a very very difficult world. We live in a very confusing world. Trust me. And you don't have not to trust me. You know this on your own. Unfortunately, at at a too young age, you have seen a lot. Um and it's very, very important to be able to hold on strong and realize life does not come without pain. Life comes with pain. But we have to choose how we're going to live every day and what we're going to focus on. I can wake up in the morning and I could say this is a meshuggener velt. This is a crazy, tragic world. Let me go back to sleep. You can do that. And you know what? I'm not going to judge you. There are people who do that. Let me say a l'chaim. Let me get drunk. Let me play on the phone for a half a day just to distract myself. You could do that. People do that all the time. It's called numbing the pain. What I want to encourage you is to do something much more courageous. Wake up in the morning and say it's a meshuggener velt. It's a painful world. It's a sad world. But I'm I'm going to do my part in bringing more happiness to this world, in bringing more joy to this world, in making more people smile in this world. This is a choice every one of us makes every single day. It's not a choice that comes from ignorance. It's a choice that comes from deep awareness that we live we we live in a velt was a sehr finster. When I'm all umetic, depressed, and you and I have to make a choice. The choice is either I wake up and I say this is a crazy, sick place. Let me go back to sleep. Or no, I'm going to do my part to bring more love, more light, more hope, more smiles, more joy, more meaning, more holiness, more goodness, more godliness into this world. I bless you and I send you all my love. And all my brochos, that each of you, Hashem should give you each the chizuk, the koach, the chiyus you need to be able to go through this kufur and to emerge from it with dignity, with power, with strength, and that the tragedy should not only not weaken you, but the tragedy should strengthen you to realize how precious every moment is, how precious every day is, how precious every week and month and year is, how precious life is. And how each and every single one of us is here on a mission. And sometimes you're not in the mood of doing it for yourself, do it for your three friends, for Amram, for Laser, for Heshy. Do it for them. Because remember that their neshamos now in Olam Ha'Emes still are connected to each of you. They will always remain connected to each of you. Neshamos don't forget their loved ones according to most of the seforim. And when you do something positive in their memory and in their tribute, it means so much to them. And this is what I would also suggest practically is that every day each and every one of you should take just 5 or 10 minutes and do something for them. Maybe learn a Mishnah, two Mishnahs, a perek Mishnayos, a haftarah, but understand it. I remember when I was sitting shiva, my father died, he was 70, and I was very, very, very broken. And a good friend of mine called me. He lost his mother when he was 14. And he told me that after he lost his mother, he was the oldest of 11 children. The oldest and she died suddenly in her 30s and left all the kids and the youngest were twins that were still nursing. And he was 14. He was the boy. You imagine? The boy was such a tragedy. He told us to me on the phone the last day of my shiva for my father of blessed memory. 16 years ago. He told me that he wrote a letter to the Lubavitcher Rebbe. And the Rebbe told him that he should learn one paragraph of Mishnayos every single day. He told me he didn't know if it meant for the year or it meant for the rest of his life. So he was learning a paragraph of Mishnayos every day. And he told me I should do the same thing. And you know what? I started to learn a paragraph of Mishnayos. Slow. Good up to touch. I know some pastors tomorrow for Yeshiva boys to learn a paragraph of Mishnayos, but trust me, it's a good thing. Finish the paragraph of Mishnayos, two Mishnas, but learn it well. Don't don't don't don't don't don't fly. Learn it slow, well, do it just understand the Mishna. First of all, every single Gemara has a big percentage of it is quotes of Mishnayos. So when you know the Imagine if any piece of Gemara you come to, you already know every Mishna the Gemara quotes. It's a different type of Gemara. Besides that benefit that people don't realize, the benefit of knowing Mishnayos for these boys, for for laser, for Amram. Learn every day something for them or give to stuck every day for them. Or do a mitzvah every day for them. Or learn something else every day for them. Or say a prayer every day for them. Or do a good deed every day for them. Every day 5 minutes, 10 minutes, 15 minutes. This is your time dedicated to your to their in the summer. First of all, it gives them a tremendous it'll give you a tremendous so, and it's going to keep the connection alive and real. I had a kazak kazak when it's kazak. If I could be here for any of you in the future, any of the families or any of the wedding, the motion three has my number. You could reach out to me directly or through email. And I'm happy to be here for you in any way I can now or in the future. Please take this as a personal invitation. If anybody has an individual question or anybody needs help and you feel that I personally could be of help, I'm always happy to be here for you. Sending you my love and my blessings and best wishes that we should all have the courage that we need. And the main thing is we should experience Uncle Schliemann he Amen. Let me take questions. Okay, I see some people ask questions on chat. So, I'll start with that, but if you want you can unmute yourself and and I'll respond to you as well. Let me begin. I I am I am a mother in New York. Okay, before I take the questions. Number one, you can put it on chat. Number two, you can unmute yourself and speak. Number three, you can text it to me and he's forwarding me questions already. Question one. I'm a mother in New York. My son is in the in the mirror. As part of the of laser and Amram and Hashi. He shared the link with me. I want to thank you for your beautiful direct words spoken from the heart. My son lost a close friend and I'm grateful that he gets to hear your words which are real and authentic. Okay, I guess that wasn't a question, but I thank you very much for your feedback. That means a lot. I am we are writing three safer Torah. Moshiach writes, we're writing three safer Torah for the three boys. For Amram Fromowitz and Leizer Brill and Hershy Weiss. Can you please expand on what that means for the neshama? Because it hurts to think that that's all that's left. And I see in the in the in the chat somebody putting a link to the charity campaign. I guess for the families over the three safer Torah, whatever it is. Okay, that's very special. So, it's it's it's a wonderful question. And obviously, you know, a Jew is compared to a safer Torah. We know the Gemara speaks about every Jew like a safer Torah. Magala Muker says Yisrael Yishishim Oisios LaTorah. Every Yid has an Ois in the Torah. So, what writing a safer Torah is not just writing a safer Torah, it's also immortalizing nishmas Yisrael in the safer Torah. And that safer Torah becomes an eternal tribute to them. And let's remember the safer Torah, and there's also living safer Torah. Every child is a safer Torah. Every Yid Shebocher is a safer Torah. Every Yid Shemaydel is a safer Torah. So, we write safer Torah in memory of the nishamas. And we also invest in the living safer Torah. Cuz each one of you is a living safer Torah that continues in your own way the connection with these very special and powerful souls. So, thank you. People are asking questions about the fact that we feel regret. A lot of the bochrim say they have so much regret. They could have stopped the plane ride. Some of them are convinced some of them convinced the niftarim to go with the plane ride. And that maybe wasn't the safest thing to do. We feel so guilty that we convinced some of these boys who were killed to go on the plane ride because some of them by nature would not do it and we had to convince them. And uh we feel horrible. We feel horrible and we feel that we're partially responsible. Ay ay ay ay ay. It's a good question. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I'm a convenant. So, here's the deal. This is a normal feeling. It's a normal feeling. You know. If somebody convinced somebody to go to a khaseneh, to go on a road trip and they were killed. It's a very, very powerful feeling of regret. But, let me ask you a question. If you would have even had a 1% suffik that this could have happened, you would have never convinced them. You would have convinced them out of it even if they wanted to go. You thought everybody does it. People do it constantly. So, people go to Meron on Lag B'Omer, right? There were people who told their children, "Go. Go to Meron. Go." They told their husbands, "Go to Meron. Go to Meron. Avada go to Meron." If anybody would have had a 1%, 2% suffik that this is what's going to happen, of course we would look at it differently. And the same in Harley. You would go shvuos to the Harley to stolen the Rebbe and who doesn't go to shidishas? You You all of you come from shidishas houses. Two of the boys from Satmar and one of the boys from Vision it's there's bleachers and matanas, mashprings, mazinks, madavens, malerens, mafabreng. If you would have had even 1% suffik in your mind that this can happen. Well, I don't mean 1%. I mean you always know everything can happen always. Every car you go into, something can happen. But, I mean if you had any serious suffik that this these boys could be killed, you would have never convinced them. You just convinced them because you thought you're going to have a good time. You know, when you go to an amusement park and kids are scared to go on the roller coaster. You say, "Come. Come. Come on." What do you You WANT THEM TO HAVE FUN. YOU, you What happens if house for some, you know, one some or sometime something happens to a roller coaster? So, to really blame yourself that you're guilty, you know that your intention was simply they should have a good time. That was your intention. So, it's important to remember that. You had no idea. You're not a navi. You don't have a kodesh. And none of you had any slightest knowledge that this could have happened. It shocks all of us. Shocks all of us. People do this. They go to places. Now, what happened on the airplane? I don't know exactly. You know, why did the pilot allow these types of maneuvers and twists and turns? I don't know the details. I didn't investigate it. It's not really my field. But one thing I know, guys, I understand that you have regrets. But the truth is that there was no possible way that you could have known. It's almost like telling a boy, "Come on the roller coaster. We'll have a good time." and then something happens to the roller coaster. You thought you're paying a pilot money. He knows what he's doing. He says he's doing this for years. So, you had the best of intentions. There's something here that's beyond us. We can't take credit for this tragedy. I'm sorry. Yes. Should people maybe be more careful in the future of these types of things? There's a lot of things to learn. But you didn't know how dangerous it was. Maybe now people have to know that these things are dangerous. I don't know. I don't know what happens there. So, I'm not the the one to get involved in this. Generally, we have to be safe. And we have to avoid things that are There's no question. It's not to go to places that are Was this considered a I don't know cuz I don't know the details. But one thing I know for sure that in your mind you didn't think that this is a dangerous thing. Whether you were right or wrong, but you didn't think so. So, it's a normal feeling that you feel horrible. You feel horrible because of what happened, but to call yourself a killer, that you're responsible for the shfichas damim. You know, I feel that you're you're you're you're being too harsh on yourself. I would do something else, and that is focus on what you can do for the neshama. Because because if you takke made a real mistake here that you knew that it was If you knew that it was dangerous, and you convinced them, which I don't think is the case, then speak this over to a posek that you trust. But in most cases that I'm familiar with, you completely had no idea. You yourself would have done it. Maybe you did it before, and you were just trying to give these guys some fun in a hot summer day in the Ukraine, and you have to be able to recognize that, and tell yourself, "Listen, we were just trying to go out and spend some time together, and go in a nice plane ride, and see the interesting places in Ukraine, and and who in their wildest imagination knew that this is going to happen?" So, it's a horrible horrible experience, but to blame yourself for what happened, how can you do that? You know? How can you do that when you really had mamash no negia here? Next question. Is it a good or bad thing to keep the boys' beds in the apartment to keep their memory alive, or it's just going to awaken difficult memories? It's a great question. There's no mitzvah to throw out their beds, you know, b'oy b'yom. You could leave it. After a while, if you want to move it, you could move it, but there's no mitzvah to, you know, go take it and throw out the You get rid of the bed, and get rid of everything that belongs to them. It's it's it's You could keep the bed if somebody needs the bed, perhaps. I know that it's not so easy with the diddis in Yerushalayim. Fine, you can give it to somebody. But, uh I don't think that you have to go to one extreme or the other extreme. You don't have to leave it there forever, but you don't have to get rid of it. You know? I don't think it's going to trigger more hard memories than you have already. You don't have to make a whole thing from it, but it's going to be there. And leave it there as long as you want, as long as you need, and then you'll see with time. You don't have to make these decisions right away. I'm a friend. I feel like I'm to blame. I did some bad things that are directly connected to the tragedy. For example, Nivel Pel. I spoke Nivel Pel. I spoke not nicely. Is there a way to soothe this pain of blame? Listen. None of us are perfect, and you may have you you have may have made some mistakes. But, to blame yourself for the death of these precious boys is not fair. It's just not fair. To destroy the Abershta, you don't have so much power. You took a gun and you killed them. You took a knife and you stabbed them. You may have made mistakes in your life. Okay. I make mistakes. You make mistakes. We all make mistakes. That's why we have a month of Elul, to be Masaken, and to repair, and to learn to speak nicer. But, to blame yourself for the death of these three boys, with all my killer to you, you're not God. And you don't run this world, and you're not the one who decided to kill them. And I doubt that you killed them. I don't know why you're taking that a crisis. Should we all learn from this? Yes. Should we all become better people? Yes. Should I fix things in my life that need to be fixed? Yes. But, to blame yourself for the death of these boys is really not fair to you. It's just not fair to you. You have a navi who came to you in the name of Hashem and said you're guilty. So, I don't think you could do this to yourself. I don't think there's a source for this. It's not fair to you. All of us could be better and all of us should be better. We don't know why they died. The spiritual reasons for why they died, why Hashem took their neshamos, I don't know. And how do we even know that it was a punishment? Maybe it was for a different reason. I don't know Hashem's mishpatim. Ein bi da'as u'mishpat. Lo me shavas l'meisah tzaddik. Who knows? What we can do is learn from it, learn from it how to behave, learn from it how to live, learn from it to take take our lives, you know, make make every day count, to give preciousness to our life. But you think these boys want you not to be depressed and blame yourself for the rest of your life. Simcha will help their neshamos much more. Be b'simcha. And I'll tell you why you should be b'simcha. Be b'simcha for the fact that you know that their neshamos are not dead. Some people think somebody dies and their life is over, but you know you're a yeshiva bochur, so you know that their neshamos are ad olam olamim. And their neshamos are in a very very Their neshamos are in the cheik, in the bosom of the Ribono shel Olam. And you know that you have a shlichus in this world to light up the world. So, my focus would be to be here for them and to connect with them, but with simcha, not with blame. Question. Should the dorm mates do What should we do? We lived in the same room like them, the same home. Should we change our dorm next zman or not? I don't think you have to unless it's too hard for you. If it's very hard for you and emotionally you're not going to be able to sleep, you're going to have nightmares, and you're going to be very scared, then if it's helpful to you, but if not, you don't have to change the deer. It's fine. I don't think you have to change the deer. Again, if you feel emotionally that it's just overwhelming and after a few days cancer's coming to say okay. But that may follow you in another deer too. But if you guys are fine, you don't have to change the deer. What I would do is you could put up a picture of them in the deer. Yeah, light a candle there for them. And as I told you, do every day come together in the deer and do something 10-15 minutes for their initial. Learn something together, give stock at together, say to him together, diamond together, do a cassette together. Maybe have a sheer for them every day 10-15 minutes 5-10-15 minutes maybe Mishnah is something else. Maybe a safer that they really liked. Maybe there was a safer that they liked or a part of of of Yiddishkeit that they like. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know their story. I of course I didn't know them. But that would be a very nice idea to do in their deer so that you really create the acre for their initial and their initial will have for sure from it because a neshama feels and knows everything. Question, why did it have to happen in such a dangerous place? There was so much terror involved. I'm not sure I understand your question. You mean why it had to happen in such a crazy way with a plane crash? I don't know the answer to that unless your question is something else. We don't know. Who Who understands why a neshama leaves the world and how? We don't know. Some people die in a hospital. Some people die in natural causes in their home. And some people just get sick and some people die in these crazy ways. I don't know. I push it don't know. You know, I'm thinking about Surfside, Florida and Carline and Myrone Corona and this plane crashes, it's mind-boggling. It's completely beyond our understanding. It happened in such a dangerous place and in such a in such a painful way. Such a painful way. I I I don't know the answer to this. I I really don't know the answer to what Question. What could we learn from this practically about going on planes? Well, I mean, we all go on airplanes. We travel. We go in cars, you know, we do that. But obviously, as I said before, we always have to avoid the any dangerous place or any dangerous situation. That's true. We were a group of friends. Thank you. Thank you for your questions, guys. We're a group of friends. We were not on the trip. We feel pain, but we find it hard to communicate with the bottom that we're on the trip. Cuz they feel much more pain. How could we be machazik our friends that were there? Because we weren't there, so we feel like a little more estranged from the whole story. Excellent question. And the answer is tied to a bachur at all. I think to be very honest with them. You know, tell the boys that we're there. Say, I was not on this trip. Let's say you were not on the trip. Say to one of them was, I was not on this trip. I wasn't there when it happened. I wasn't part of the planning, you know. We found out about it only later. But I just want to be able to be here for you. And I know I don't feel in the same way like you because I don't have that guilt and I don't have that feeling like, you know, we all we could have made plans today to be somewhere else, that day to be somewhere else. But I just want to be here for you. I think in these situations, we need to be very honest with each other. And you may tell him. You may tell him, you know, you may feel that you can't really talk to me because what do I know? What do I understand? And you're right. You're right. I don't feel it like you cuz I was in there to straw. I wasn't there. It's a very different feeling. It was a very different experience. I just say I want to be here for you and that means a lot. Don't underestimate that. But be open and be honest and be respectful on both sides. Those who were there and those who were not there. Remember, don't judge people's emotions. People are entitled to have all types of emotions. Some of them are going to be very intense. Don't be afraid of them. Don't be afraid of your emotions. We know about Sachin and Einesh. For mitzvahs we get rewarded. For avedas we get punished. They were all such good boys. People are not perfect. So who says that they're not suffering right now? They were not perfect people. They were great boys, but they had their stuff just like we all have their stuff. So maybe their neshamos are suffering now in Olam Haba. Wow. You guys are asking good questions. It's a good chabura I see you have my chance feeders don't have to get to get chabura. Um So let me let me let me just say this. Let me say this. Uh It's important to understand. Let's quote the Baal Shem Tov. The Baal Shem Tov said that Aibershter hot lib yedn Yid mer vi a tato un a mama hobn lib a ben yochid vos is iz ik nusa. Hashem loves every single Jew more than parents love an only child who was born when they already had no hope of having a child. So we can understand how deep their love it is and Hashem's love is infinitely more. So you don't have to worry about their neshamos. Hashem is taking care of their neshamos and even if their neshamos need to go through something, it's done with the tachlis ahava, with the deepest love, and with the deepest sensitivity, and with the deepest affection, especially when they went through such an event, such an experience, which between you and me, I know that they weren't perfect, but as not perfect as they were, they never deserved this, probably, right? So, this is so shocking, it's so mysterious, it's so overwhelming. So, even if there's anything needed, I'm sure everything was taken care of. And their neshamos are being dealt with with tremendous love and tremendous warmth. And I would not worry that these neshamos are suffering. I really would not worry about it. They already went through such a trauma and such a transformation. And remember, all their families are suffering. That's also part of it. So, I think it's much more right and much more much more emes, al pi Torah, to really know that these neshamos are in Gan Eden in Olam HaEmes, and even if they need some type of tikkun, whatever it is, it's completely done with the greatest love and with the greatest sensitivity, not chas v'shalom in a way of of more suffering and more suffering. Especially when you know that these yeshiva bachurim were such such great neshamos. And if they had a they made a few mistakes, they made a few mistakes, especially in our generation, when every one of the Jewish people is yakar mikol yakar and kadosh mikol kadoshim. Is precious and holy and sacred. Remember also that our souls come after thousands and thousands of years. Our souls are the last generation of galus and the first generation of geulah. Our souls come after thousands of years of galus. So, Yidden today are betachlis atara, betachlis akdusha. And most of the mistakes that Jews make come from golus. And from our lack of understanding of how beautiful and holy we are. So, most of our mistakes are not even our faults. That's the truth. You can look at all the bachrum and you'll see it. You can look at all the all the all Yiddishe kinderlach and you'll see it. So, I am positive and certain that their neshamos are in a in in in a very pure and beautiful and sacred place. That's at least how I look at it. But, I think that this is the truth. Baruch Hashem, $200,000 already came in for charity to be able to get involved in these things. That's what somebody wrote. Okay. That's wonderful. Listen, people are very affected by this. It's it's not an easy time. It's not an easy time. Okay, so let me finish. Another 50,000 to go with my achas hatzlacha. Let me finish with a blessing to all of you. Once again, if I could be here for anybody in the future, please don't hesitate to reach out. You can reach out through email or through the Moishe Schwie who can give you my email or text. And we should have so much simcha tamid kol hayamim. The bonai Yerushalayim should give all of you the chizuk, the koachus, and the chiyus that you need during this kufa. And I know that these three souls that were taken away do the yored l'ganai will kodesh hashanim el neshamos tzadikim as says in medrish will continue to love you and be connected to you and you'll be connected to them until the great moment when we're going to be reunited. Somebody asks a question. This is a tsaris harabim, obviously. It's not just one individual. Does it need a tikun that everybody should work on? Or everybody should look what they need to be masaken personally? Listen, I I am not in the position to be able to talk about what everybody has to be masaken. I think it's always better at least what I could share is that everybody of us looks at ourselves personally. And if there's something we feel that the rabim can benefit, we can always bring it out and suggest it. But my life personally I could work on right away. So that's how I think is is a good focus. We should have siras tovis. I love you all. Hatzlacha. A good choidesh, a good yar, a good gebentsh yar aksov, sima tovis shana tova, m'suka. And thank you very much. Chazak chazak v'nischazek. Taired bochurim. This class is brought to you by the Yeshiva.net. Please help us continue the classes. Make even a small contribution at www.theyeshiva.net/donate.