Live Questions & Answers With Rabbi YY Jacobson: Beautiful on the Outside, Miserable on the Inside

the yeshiva.net okay everybody welcome tonight to the show tonight is our 15th program that we're doing for hashem this platform is exploding as you can see berkshire we brought the best of the best tonight we brought out the the double the double guns over here and we're gonna rack it up tonight um again i want to tell everybody it's an open platform uh this has been advertised all over so don't forget there's people from all walks of life here some 613s i'm not and uh let's keep that in mind um i want to first start off uh thanking our advertising sponsors tonight i'd like to thank the lakewood scoop for always promoting us over here in lakewood and pushing the program so strong and bringing the crowd in i want to thank ravi and yaniv from kazakh who always have been very behind us and helping the program grow again from children's teens singles couples millennials baby boomers from all the charity seniors hazak offers programming for all for more information be part of it please go to kazakh.com i give a special thank you to mrs mika sopher for promoting us on cll live thank you very much we really appreciate it and uh again this program again really exploded we have a lot of uh big people coming on the next few weeks and we hope to really cover some ground and give them some physique let's start off first with our host coach manatham to open up a few words thank you okay welcome everyone i see there's a big crowd and i i want to tell dylan again there's a lot of seats up front so the oil limb could come in you don't have to stand by the door so welcome again here we are back hashem another sunday night on let's get real with coach menachem show and the truth is tonight's topic evoked many questions by the oilum the topic is if everything is so beautiful on the outside why are we so miserable and inside so the questions that came in first of all who said everything is so beautiful on the outside you're talking about from the corbin base amigdas until covet until it's going and everything in between and then there were those who said um miserable who said i'm miserable you would probably uh many people didn't show up tonight because they felt tonight is not for them because they're not miserable and for those who did show up and don't feel you don't have to feel so miserable but if you have the same kind that we're looking for maybe you'll share with us soon a little bit of some tips of how you do it all the questions came in is what's this outside and inside what's this thing of inside feeling or outside and um how about i'm in the three weeks how does that go together i think we have a lot to discuss tonight's administration robert jacobson i'm very excited to have you on tonight to help us out i think we have um a lot we hopefully will be able to put it in a few minutes because that's all we have tonight is a few minutes okay let me start with the introductions over here i want to say first of all i just got a text that somebody in lake was really not feeling well this girl should be partially or a social food dilemma for a young woman in lakeport in critical condition khanna feige tonight our sponsor is my cousin abrahamil and rafale jacobson for sponsoring program tonight it's the ila nishmas it's very interesting how this program came about um his brother who was just lifted during covid and it's my cousin and it's actually rabbit why was cousins we're not related but we share a cousin and i reached out to abuela i said let's make a sheer little mishmash a cousin who's just lifted during covet and um it's a big honor that we did it together and it should be a massive uh scruts foreign i haven't been his roommate for a few years he was a very young boy he was a toddler he always went to learn and i was always impressed with him and um many years ago he had a traumatic brain injury and he lived very very hard years and my aunt also with sheeran rabbi jacobson to me tanta jacobson who's a real sadiques who really gave shloymi uh 18 years plus of chaim and beauty even though it was tremendous hard to take care of such a person and he was a real special person and there's no shame to have a massive aliyah for tonight um i want to first say also thank you if you're coming tonight and anybody doesn't know who i is i'm going to give a little intro so not everybody knows who you are maybe you know people here say who's why why so we'll break it down for him but why would jacob is listening yeah yes mother-in-law father-in-law said one of america's premier jewish thinkers and leaders robert y jacobson yesterday jacobson is one of the most sought-after speakers in the jewish world today he serves as a mentor to hundreds of thousands across the globe and is considered one of the most passionate and mesmerizing communicators of toronto in today's generation during the coronavirus pandemic he presented hundreds of classes and lectures to every demographic of the jewish community worldwide offering inspiration and perspective his video clips of physics went viral reaching millions of people right but why jacobsen was the first rabbi ever to be invited by the pentagon to deliver religious keynote to the us military chief of captains the national security agency over the last 20 years rabbi jacobson traveled to hundreds of communities schulz schools yeshivas and universities across the globe educating and inspiring people of all backgrounds with majestic depth of torah and yiddish guys have a jackson founded and serves as dean of yeshiva.net teaching via the web one of the largest torah classes in the world today with thousands of students globally born in 1972 in brooklyn new york robert jackson grew up at his teaching and writing in 1988 at the age of 15 a young jason began serving as a small team of oral scribes and human tape recorders you're recording this night right in your head they were charged with memorizing and transcribing three to seven hours of talks by the travel of blessed memory which were presented on shabbat and jewish holidays when recorded devices were used jacobson please open up when recording devices are not used thank you very very much my dear making thank you very much coach menachem it's a privilege and is thrilling opportunity to be here with you and so many hundreds and hundreds of jews who are here live and those who will watch it afterwards thank you for the invitation thank you for the opportunity allow me to begin with an anecdote somebody once asked his friend and he said what do you say about worrying i'm always worried always worried she said you know warring is like sitting in a rocking chair you ever sat in a rocking chair it keeps you busy but it gets you no it gets you nowhere there is a lot of anxiety in people i think we all know it from our own lives and people who are close to us loved ones family friends community members and it's being spoken a lot what what's the motto of this show let's get real right let's get real we live in a generation where repression is not working anymore repressing problems is just it's just ineffective maybe there were times that it was very effective garnished you don't say you know don't tell don't say and everything goes away or at least it looks like it goes away but in today's generation that strategy is completely ineffective at least with hundreds of thousands and millions of people especially with the youth and things are emerging and part of what's emerging in so many people's life is a deep sense of discontentment a lot of struggle trauma that sits in the body for many years and people you look at their lives otherwise relatively listen everyone has challenges we're in gullis everybody knows life is not perfect and all of us suffer in one way or another but relative to your grandparents great grandparents it's like uh unbelievable even with quarantine and even with covet 19 and of course not taking away or minimizing god forbid the tragedies the deaths the illness people who are suffering people who suffer the grief and the sadness of course we all know that in our extremely all of us have lost friends and rabbasha mentioned cousins relatives neighbors teachers mentors community members and so forth and yet despite all of that there's a lot to be thankful for but people are so internally stressed and anxious and i would like to share here you know very briefly before we open up to questions and answers and discussions and dialogue which is our main topic just a few brief points that i find empowering in my life and i think may be empowering in your life as well a lot of what we're seeing today at least the way i see it maybe i'm wrong is actually a blessing the navi daniel says about the time of the gooloola is bhararovya slab novi it's our furabim in makshava in works of mahshava musa hashikafa kabbalah siddhis there was a concept called beeru beeru like in shabbos we have in shalhamarakansim and shinyutas bayer or those who are learning massachusetts already learned today and gimbal in dalit what's selecting separating the good from the bad what we're seeing now is that toxicity is emerging it's very painful but i think it's very positive because before the time of goula the reborn of shalom gives us an opportunity to allow ourselves to extricate from our systems from our personalities and from our communities all the silas the toxicity that comes from generations intergenerational trauma skeletons demons ghosts anxiety guilt fear narcissism greed brokenness depression melancholy and other forms of deep mental psychological emotional and spiritual challenges that sit in us either from our own lives or from many many years and generations and today it's emerging it's coming to the fore it's coming to the light and many of us are scared what's going on it's happening with our kids boys and girls from all communities and all demographics i have this just to address constantly children youth young adults younger light young men young women older people literally all communities in the jewish world and it's fascinating common denominator that these struggles really are everywhere and things that 20 30 40 years ago nobody even noticed everybody knew it's part of life you move on there's an intolerance for it whether it's corruption whether it's hypocrisy whether it's politics whether it's abuse whether it's trauma whether whether it's inner dishonesty falsehood the lack of emis and it's all emerging and you could say gevault what's going on today's generation never the good old days vanilla cotton this is the generation that's getting ready to be makable so the reborn of shalom gives us an opportunity to be able to clean out the last silas after thousands of years of jewish history the final era the last inning the machiavellis we have to extricate from ourselves the little dysfunction and and the toxicity and dirt and filth that still lay in our system maybe not by our fault at all and when it comes to the fore don't get scared of it it's an opportunity to deal with it things that are hidden hidden infections you can't deal with infections that are exposed gives us all an opportunity to once and for all confront it deal with it get rid of it sometimes transform it subdue it but deal with it there's an extraordinary teaching of the balshemptiv in parishes tells the jewish people when they're standing at the red sea overtaken by fear and dread between the rock and the hardball between the egyptians and the yamsaf and moshe says as you see egypt today you will never see them again you're not going back to egypt you won't see them again because the jews wanted to go back so the mufasam say it's very repetitive language you should say lord says don't worry you're not going back to egypt he says just like you see them today i'm telling you you're never going to see them again something is strange there the wall shem they've gave an incredible interpretation you know why you're never going to see them again because you're ready to see them today kakashi is misray in my own because you're ready to look at them today you can get them out of your system you'll never have to see them again if you're not ready to look at them today you're going to see them again and again and again because if you repress it into your subconscious it's going to re-emerge and resurface in this way and that way and that way it's going to ultimately emerge and hijack the conversation of your com brain in one way or another that's what happens when you repress things if i'm ready to look at my mitzrayim what's matrayam mitsrayam comes from the word maitsarim confinements those things in my life that trap me they imprison me they make me miserable they make me mediocre they cause me untold agony turmoil confusion uncertainty depression bad moods anger frustration all these mitzrayims these clippers these shells that literally incarcerate me and abduct me they abduct my life my schedule my mental space my energy flow and my simracing my joy of life if i'm ready to look at my mitzrayim then lois i see fuller island then you can actually quarantine mitzrayim and it doesn't sit in your system and really doesn't sabotage you so what he's teaching here is something that i find to be very profound and that is if you and i could really learn that i and you do not have to be afraid of any emotion any emotion that you have don't be afraid of it remember you are bigger than it your soul is infinite this is not a melitza it's not nice you know pop psychology words trying to say nice things to people it's the core of judaism that a soul is a helico you are a manifestation of divine infinity in this world just like your creator you're invincible the gemara says in kidus everybody knows we are of the reborn shalom in this world you have the properties of the one who sent you you are an ambassador of the divine i could contain all the egyptian forces inside of me because i'm larger than it you're larger than it and therefore never be afraid or intimidated by any thought by any craving by any sensation by any emotion and when it comes up watch it observe it remember that it's not you it's mitzrayim inside of you and also this is critical when you look at it you could say what ask yourself what is it coming to teach me there's something it's here to help me it's here to bring awareness to my life this is painful this is not easy what i'm saying it sounds nice it's not so easy this is real avoid this hashem on a daily basis that i have to do that we have to do this is real avoid this hashem take internalizing this but when these things come up and they come up by many of us unless you're a robot or you're a worked out saint i don't know about you i could say about me they come up often to be able to identify it not to be afraid not to run you don't have to run anywhere don't be afraid to look at mitzrayim because when you could look at mitzrayim now you will not be a victim of it you will define it instead of it defining you remember that your core is indestructible it's confident it's powerful it's infinite it's a manifestation you are a manifestation of hashem's light in this world each of us is an ambassador of love light hope healing empowerment wisdom authenticity integrity redemption every single person in their own unique way and remember everyone is an indispensable note in god's cosmic symphony each one of adam loima the mishnah says in sanhedrin this is not yuhara it's not some pompous arrogant hubris of some see suffering from narcissistic personality disorder you come home and you tell your wife the world was cr created for me because she's also supposed to say the world was created for me that's a great marriage you say the world was created for you and i say the world was created for me and then you go to therapy the chat is much deeper we're talking about ms lamite what is there something about my life that nobody before me and nobody after me will be able to make the contribution that i have to make in order to change the world and years before i was born the script was written by the creator of the world that when the time right time comes you and i should be able to shine in our full glory and be able to bring our light to the world and that means that when toxicity emerges that's part of my light it's here to help me reach my own inner gullah my own inner state of redemption thank you for listening thank you robin jason beautiful opening um did i stick to 10 minutes did i stick to the tim i stuck to the 10 minutes i think right not bad it's pretty impressive i got to tell you i was i was concerned that the opening would take about two hours but you really not bad at all okay uh we have a bunch of live questions this is the part of the program which makes it dynamic we're asking everybody to turn on the cameras anybody who has live questions please text me the live questions go first we got a tremendous amount of emails uh coach monachem uh already about 75 emails to us so we're fully loaded with questions whatever wants to ask live we'll go first um we have one live but i'm going to start with one question first and then we'll go to the live questions and maybe we'll do a poll somebody emailed us before barca shem i have so much good in my life but lately i'm feeling miserable life isn't feeling purposeful i'm not finding the meaning in learning or davening or praying any tips to help me feel connected to torah mitzvoth thank you rabbi jacobson yes it's of course hard to give you know a answer without knowing you individually and knowing a little more about your life but i think we could share i could share some general thoughts that may or may not apply but at least could plant some seeds i think i would suggest three things that may be helpful the first thing is it's important to have a person or people in your life with whom you are completely open as the mishna puts it means that each of us needs to have people in our lives in whose presence we can think out loud somebody with whom you can really think out loud and means not be afraid of your vulnerability to really share everything that's on your mind maybe i could be a professional somebody who does it if a profession or a confidant but somebody you really trust who's wise who's perceptive who's humble and who cares for you i think that may be very helpful for you to really have that type of relationship where you could beer everything beer your soul and really share everything that's going on because we are ultimately subjective we have so many blind spots we have biases we have so many fears just having that feedback from somebody who's outside of my own subjective orbit and didn't grow up with my traumas and dysfunction i think is extremely helpful the second thing i would suggest to you is do you have a real relationship with hashem a real vulnerable relationship with your owner shaman we all learn we learn together we have shirum we dave and we go through the routines but it's often just monotonous like the navi says mitsvasanashima can you spend time really cultivating your own very intimate relationship with hashem on a daily basis in terms of conversation in terms of meditation in terms of communication and in terms of really finding god inside of you now you may need help with this and direction with this but this is something that i think when you could find godliness within you there is something eternal that you wake up to you become part of the heartbeat of the cosmos you become part of the divine symphony you find your own infinite empowerment as a shleak of hashem and your heart beats in a different way the third thing i would suggest to you is find a mission that you're passionate about in life every one of us is a macabre and a mashbiya we can't just take we have to give find something and start doing it it could be a small thing start giving whatever it is it could be making a shear it could be making an organization a website helping people physically financially morally emotionally spiritually religiously be for younger people older people people you know people you don't know get involved in something start you people will criticize you that's fine all good things get criticized get feedback got a zoom program do something those are the three things i think are good to start with okay robert jacobson now that you bring up this point i want to take a poll let's see what let's see what the people were dealing with let's take a poll how people connect wonderful okay everybody please look at the screen i'd like everybody to answer it's anonymous i just want to get a little feeling from everybody my connection with hashem i have what's what's your connection with hashem i have a strong connection as option a every day is different sometimes you feel close sometimes you don't option c i don't feel connected option d i don't know what connection with hashem means those of you four options please choose one of them and the question number two is how do you connect with hashem robert jacobson look at this question by doing mitzvos by doing the right thing what's your method how you feel connected with hashem everybody please answer the question again i'll read it quickly again my connection with hashem is a i have a strong connection b every day is different c i don't feel connected d i don't even know what a connection means question number two how do you connect what's your connection with a gem sorry how do you connect with the gem option a davening option b talking to hashem option c by doing missus option d by doing the right thing five seconds wow it's gonna be interesting three two one and the chair look at this my connection with hashem 39 of people say i have a very strong connection with hashem 53 percent of people every day is different and i guess the other two really i don't feel connected i guess they're not they're not here tonight so that's good and i don't even know what hashem the connection hashem means is two percent how do you connect how do you connect with hashem twenty four percent say davening an overwhelming majorities fifty-two percent say talking with hashem that's the way they connect hashem eight percent by doing mitzvahs 17 by doing the right thing interesting result trevor jacobson yeah fascinating see we talked to hashem that's the way that's the way people connect can i take the first live question she ready yes hi how are you i'm god how are you um basically my question is that a lot of times i feel frustrated and i feel upset i guess there's just days when i feel really bad and i'm in a really bad mood and i'm feeling very depressed and upset and like i feel like i know in my head like i know in my heart i'm being like halfway through i'm not appreciating the good i know that coffee table is a very bad meat i know that like in this in like the desert um in the mid bar like a shawl like would complain and then they would have a plague and then like they would it would be like a very bad meet on like it would get in trouble for it and like it's very bad complain and stuff like that so i feel like um is that sound like upset at me when i'm like really upset like is it like really really bad that i'm being so cough i told like i just have to get over it like it's just like a question like is it also like i feel upset also myself also because i'm being caught by toe but like yeah i'm very upset at me because i'm being caught by twelve it's like you know what i mean like that kind of thing do you know what the name penina means penina you know what the name nina stands for you know what it means um yeah what means um it means like pearl a pearl yeah a very beautiful dazzling diamond or pearl you know why you have that name because hashem wants you to know you know a name is considered the channel of energy that's connected to your soul hashem wants you to know that you're a pnina you are always a pearl when we're ungrateful and we're miserable does hashem get upset at us i want you to remember that hashem loves hashem's love to you the baal shem tov said that hashem loves every jew more than parents love an only child who was born when they were older and they already lost all hope of ever having a child the doctor said they won't have and then they were gifted with a blessing of a child one can only fathom the depth of the infinite love that the mother harbors to such a one child not even a big family which over there also the love is infinite the basham said even that doesn't capture the magnitude of the love that hashem has to every single person so whenever we talk about hashem being upset at us and being angry at us and so forth you always have to remember it's always in context of absolute unconditional infinite and limitless love hashem is your greatest fan he wants you to have the most beautiful amazing successful joyous awesome life however when i am miserable and i'm ungrateful it's painful for hashem just like it would be painful for a good mother or a good father to see that a child instead of learning how to celebrate their life their brain naturally goes to negative places and that's what i would suggest to you watch what your brain does remember you are not your thoughts this is important in life i am not my thoughts it says in tanya thoughts are like clothes i am not my becca i am not my tie and sometimes my clothes get dirty and i take them off and i put on new clothes and even if i can't take them off right now because i'm a middle of a zoom chat right okay but i know it's my clothes it's not me you are not your thoughts and your thoughts are not you when my thoughts say my life is miserable we right away say i say life is miserable you don't say it your thoughts are saying it could you watch those thoughts don't judge them and don't scream at them just watch them and say wow you're really programmed to go to negative places you know what i'm gonna try to direct my neural pathways to different places and focus on a different way of looking at life and when you do this steadily your brain actually neuroscience your brain will develop new neural pathways and you will find it much more natural and easy that to go in positive places because our brain develops literally like highways tiny little neural pathways where our thoughts just become constant and steady and it becomes like part of our habit and when you really freedom is a muscle you know lose it or use it or lose it when you really observe it then you know that you have the freedom to think about life differently and your brain actually adjusts to a new way of thinking so hashem is not angry at you i would say more hashem is sad or or pained that you cannot celebrate yourself as the pearl which you really are beautiful rabbit jackson we're getting hundreds we're gonna jump in for a second object is very very clear and i would say for a beginner if somebody has to work on removing themselves from their thoughts which is not easy but for a beginner a good idea which many people have heard from me before would be to spend at least five minutes a day what should they do take a pen and paper and write down all your negative thoughts just keep on going all the negative thoughts do it for every day for a while and look how it goes the thoughts go back and forth write everything down if something comes to your mind put it down on the paper so you're putting your thoughts on paper and that could be easier at least for beginners to be able to remove themselves okay let's go to the next fly one here we go brella hi can i be heard yes loud and clear hi my name is rella thank you robbie jacobson for your sharing your wisdom i find i've suffered many losses in my life and i find that um in the firm communities i love my community i love being a jew i was raised in this community i see the beauty of the community but i find that it's unwelcome and un to to express grief or sadness or anger or pain i am constantly i find and even in schools i'm a special educator children are inundated with smile smile smile it has to be happy gum zulutova have the taco and have a meena i find there isn't enough room for feelings and in therapy my therapist has said that trying to achieve spiritual heights and going to gum zulutova and going to be tougher and amuna from a place of pain is something she calls spiritual bypass we're trying to get to the spiritual heights without experiencing the feelings she's and in my 12-step programs we're told in order to heal it you have to feel it she says you have to do the hard work of feeling the pain and feeling the grief and mourning as long as you need to and only then will come relief and a sense of clarity and a sense of peace and a sense of acceptance it's kind of like the five stages of acceptance from elizabeth kubler-ross you have to have anger and denial and bargaining and grief before one can reach acceptance and i find that this is not i find there's almost no permission for anyone to grieve a child falls down ah you're okay we move on i think that that's painful and unhealthy and i and i struggle with it and i find many other people struggle with it as well and i wanted to hear your thoughts about that i'm going to share with you a personal experience i had it was around a year or two ago i was invited matsuya shabbas to come to akumsits in pomona which is a neighborhood near muncie close to where i live with teenagers these were what you would call struggling teenagers they were in a particular yeshiva that tried to accommodate them there were around 40 of them and they came here for the weekend and they were sitting around the fire pit with guitars drums some other instruments roasting marshmallows eating hot dogs burgers spare ribs and enjoying the nice comforts singing songs and sharing and camaraderie and love it was a very nice energy i was invited to come you know for bring with them as we say so i sat down near the fire i shared some words we sang i shared the middle of one of the songs i'll i'll always remember this moment a boy comes over to me he puts his chair right near me and he puts his hand on my shoulders like this you know like the camp and camp when you sit by bonfires as i and he says these words rabbi why why why did my mother die i didn't expect this i looked at him i said i'm sorry when did she die he said when i was 11 years old nine years ago i was 11 years old we had a family of 11 11 children i was close to the top there were many younger than i am she got cancer she was live we lived in london and she passed away a young girl a young lady in her 40s low 40s tell me why did my mother die i was so close to my mother i loved her she loved me she was such a good mother why did she die i looked at him my hand went on his hand on his shoulder and i said i don't know why your mother died i am so so so sorry i don't know he says come on tell me why why did she have to die and i said i really really don't know and i would love to be here with you and it must be so painful nine years later you talk about it and i can't give you an answer but you know what i could sing with you i can cry with you i could listen to you and he started to cry and i started to cry and we sang together he didn't say a word i don't know maybe twenty minutes later he turns to me and tears with it with tears in his eyes and he says you know you're the first one from dozens of people who said that they don't know and this was the answer i have been waiting for for almost a decade i said what do you mean this is dance he says i went to so many people and everybody he said with good intentions try to explain to me some reason anesha ma gilgal again carbona you know we're good with explanations he said and it drove me mad it was so insensitive to my experience even if they meant well he says you were the first one to say i don't know but i can cry with you and i realized at that moment how transformative that was for this boy and indeed indeed i have to say this kid not only turned his life around he became a powerhouse today a powerhouse of inspiration of of love for so many other people so i think really to put it in perspective you have to understand jews have been through so much that often they emphasize the idea of putting one foot in front of another foot and moving on and at times it may have saved us and saved people not to uh wallow in the quagmire of despair but i am in complete agreement with you that there's absolutely no reason to deprive people from the permission of experiencing their feelings and being in touch with their feelings and that it's completely not a contradiction to a muna and people are afraid and i think it's a misconception that if they say i'm in pain i'm in horrible pain it means they don't believe in hashem means they don't have bitterness if you believe in hashem you should start dancing you should start dancing but i say no no there were there are people on that level there's no question no question of people on that level but mune hashem also means hashem wants me to experience this emotion right now this is part of this is part of my relationship with life mikabal people translate means you have to say it's rosy and dandy and it's amazing were there people like that or people who lived on that plane i could tell you stories but it's not relevant not so relevant right now but wherever you are that's where your relationship with hashem has to be i cannot feign and i cannot copy people this idea of copying other people in a fictional way is just it's not real it's not real spirituality it's not a real relationship religion is about being authentic being raw being vulnerable sometimes the kabul is a big ideal in judaism means to accept to accept with sincerity and love that this pain is part of my journey this is what god wants for me at this moment okay coach raphael you want to jump in you are you ready for the next one ready okay i'll go you're on yes hi hi rabbi jacobson i'm a very big fan of yours i wanted to ask you um i was one of the very first cases of of the cove virus in my city and it i went through a very difficult ordeal because i was two weeks i'm in the intensive care unit and i had it was very dangerous and one week in in therapy and i got home like a few months ago i've been recuperating i was on oxygen and in a wheelchair it was like a very shocking experience for me so my question to you would be i've always been a very positive person i feel always very close to hashem but now i just can't seem to get over it it was it was too difficult of an experience i don't know what happened but i i'm very grateful to hashem that i i survived this i was it was very dangerous but i can't seem to feel simple or be happy i'm i'm very depressed i'm very scared all the time like more than depressed even i'm very uh nervous and scared so i wanted to ask you if you have any suggestions for me and i i also feel like upset with myself because i should be i am grateful to hashem but i just can't get over the experience it was very difficult so what would you suggest yeah first of all i'm not an expert but i would say you know there may be trauma sitting in your body from this experience so it may be yes so first of all i think you need guidance from somebody who can help you how do you release the trauma maybe there's different forms of exercises different forms of therapies different forms of massages different forms of meditations of mindfulness of of different exercises hiking or other things dancing i have different professionals who can really help the body release a lot of this trauma maybe some form of ptsd so that's number one that would be extremely helpful you probably have a lot sitting in there that you need to you need to express you need to grieve you need to let it out you need to sob a little bit i think a lot has to be extricated and spit out and don't be afraid of doing it because it's now trapping you and you really have to give it the freedom acknowledge it and give it the freedoms that's number one in addition to that and not excluding that in addition to that i would just say it would be worthwhile every day to make a call to two or three people who are either who were either sick with covet 19 or they have a family member who is sick or may still be sick just to share with them that you're thinking about them and you want to bless them and you want to know if they want if they need something i have myself in the early stages of corona i have a friend she heads an organization for sick people and i asked her to send me in every few days lists of people who were struggling themselves or their family members were struggling and i just called them out of the blue some of them thought it was fictional it was like a recording so they're like waiting for the recording to end and then i'm like no it's real and i found not only was it a great physique for them it was a great hazard for me because when you get the feedback of how you help other people it puts you in a different place and i think since you have been through so much you're in a unique ability even though you're still down and you have your own challenges every day call one two three people tell them a joke say you're davening for them ask them how they are maybe it could be strangers it could be relatives it could be old friends with people classmates you didn't speak to in 29 years but i think those two things may be very helpful coaching on this one are you you muted not me there yeah very clear you're good okay it's very interesting because we have a question exactly the opposite ravages i want to flip it around you ready i feel connected to hashem when i'm in serious and almost in a bad mood of going through a rough time that's why i feel really connected to hashem when i'm happy i almost have a guilty feeling i shouldn't be feeling that way exactly the opposite yes that's part of the jewish trauma you know let's be happy you gotta be gonna be sad you don't know what to be yeah it's it's almost like when i'm in pain you know barack hashem you know life is miserable wonderful i could feel jewish but uh so so this is really i think something we have to work on um here's a good way of saying it jakov kaminetsky's at sal and before him the ostroft cerebes just the holy austro of cerebra who was one generation earlier passed away in the 1920s they both share a fascinating comment what did yaakov learned for 14 years in the yeshiva of shame and aver what did he learn for 14 years that he did not learn by yitzhak and by avram he was 15 years by avrom he was 63 years by yitzchak what did he learn by shame and neighbor that yitzhak and avrom couldn't teach him he had to go learn the brisket era the galatians the pilot should there irish what did he learn of the literature what did he learn there fourteen years that he couldn't hear from youtube and rebiaco writes and dostaffser ever writes in different words he he knew tyrus eretz israel by shame and naver he learned terrorist hagolos he knew how to be a jew and narrative syrah how whoops how do you be a jew in golos that's a different art how do you live by love on a quintessential crook ah debased liar and thug how do you remain ayako eva vinu 20 years by lovin that's a different traitor he had to go 14 years learn what they call tyra sagalos if i may i want to spin that and say for 2 000 years we have mastered tyrus hagolos we know unbelievably well how to be jews and gullahs and now i think history is summoning us to learn tyrus hagula to prepare for goula what does it mean to be a gula jew not a do i know how to dance and say no no no there comes a time in history where hashem says i want you to prepare yourself to celebrate redemption to celebrate an expanse of consciousness to see yourself as a divine powerhouse who can change the world if i sneeze in china literally a sneeze in wu on china can literally change the world this whole zoom chat right now is because somebody sneezed in wuhan right together with everything else that was affected and 7.7 somebody sneezed and by the way they're not blaming israel about this hashem even the u.n did not blame israel for the corona which is also a miracle china not israel okay the jews are not guilty one thing in history that we're not guilty because global warming the oil spill in mexico 9 11 is israel but this is not israel fakert israel reacted swift and wisely meruba midatova what the power of a person is so i think today is a time where it's important to work on this and say you know when you get up and you're feeling good you're feeling empowered you're feeling optimistic you're feeling confident this is not the antithesis of judaism we're preparing for a time when the world will be filled with eternal joy the navi says simchas and the preparation is that already now the jewish people should celebrate life as a jew celebrate your life as an ambassador of hashem celebrate your blessings dance to the beat of life but jason my my my text box is blowing up okay i'm trying to let's let's try to keep up the pace over here i'm trying to keep up with everybody okay let's take the next live one you ready cookie you're on thank you hi rabbi jacobson thank you for taking my question um i have always i've always found it really difficult to talk to hashem whether it's using us the words that are in the sitter or just talking as myself and i feel like i have no i have no place to be doing that that i've done so many things wrong in my life that what right do i have to come and talk to hashem or ask him for things and then there's also this element of fear that like don't open your mouth and call attention to yourself because then he'll realize wait a minute there's someone here who who hasn't really been doing so great like and so i guess i want to know how can i repair what i call this dysfunctional non-relationship with hashem excellent question beautiful question i don't know your relationship with your parents because i don't know your parents i also don't know you but imagine you have the most functional loving healthy father and mother in the world i don't know that you do but i certainly hope you do but imagine you have such a father and mother and for whatever reason because of your own struggles you haven't been on speaking terms with your mother for 10 years for 15 years for 20 years for six years for seven years and you feel you made a lot of mistakes what do you think your mother would crave more than anything else that you say to yourself oh my mother probably hates me i'll never call her again let me just excommunicate her and get rid of her or if it's a real healthy functional loving mother every day and every night she waits for the telephone call you know the answer if this is true with a human mother how much much so is it true with somebody who conceived you in love and who loves you in the most infinite way like only a god a creator can love because he's infinite never ever think of guilt and mistakes in terms of if i show up hashem is going to say oh this this young woman to call me hashem celebrates every time you pick up the phone or you send a whatsapp to god or actually god doesn't need whatsapps you can talk directly it's celebrated he loves it he cherishes it he misses you why do you think hazal made three twills a day shakras min they didn't know that jews are busy they wanted to make everybody meshuga maid of non-stop the answer is because they knew how much it means not only to us how much it means to hashem it's like when you have a great marriage a great marriage therapist once told me he's one of the best in muncie he saved a lot of marriages and he told me something very profound he said you know a good marriage every three hours husband and wife connect every three hours i love you i'm thinking about you how was your day what's going on do you need an iced coffee do you want a latte you want to take a walk every three hours they connect and he said if you don't connect every three hours you start drifting away it's just that at night you could make up and compensate for the fact that you didn't connect for the last six nine ten hours is after a few days if you haven't connected it's it's going down south because when you have such a deep relationship it has to constantly be maintained and connected and and and and strengthened and that's why tv is so often it's not just they wanted to impose more pressure on jews it was a timeless opportunity for people in middle of the anxiety and stress of the day to say hashem is so to speak gonna stop everything and he says i want to hear what's going on in your life what's going on in your soul the fact that you have had difficult years and you made more mistakes is only a reason that he wants to hear from you even more he wants to be here for you even more so every feeling of guilt that you have should be turned around into a springboard for saying you're not evil essentially god never excommunicates a jew you're his child forever and ever so he wants that close relationship and if there's things to fix on the contrary he wants to help empower you to fix anything you have done never see yourself as this lost soul who's just banned that attitude is coming from the eight sahara and must never be embraced as a way of life are you ready for the next one we got you loaded rabbit jackson we'll finish we made up at 2 30 right let's go next one yeah oh yvette hi yes how are you jacobson we met you at uh sabatoni wisconsin we are from wisconsin but we are originally from lima peru we are the jeruvians and always something that has puzzled me it's a since i am seven years old i'm extremely happy and i think i taught myself to be happy in the most amazing way so people always look at me and say what are you taking you cannot be for real and i am for real so i came up with a description that i i have learned to manage my emotions but i just wanted to know you think this is a gift that i was given when since i'm seven years old i mean and i had tragedies but i always look at the very positive way so i just wanted your comment could it be i mean people have said that i am in denial you know and i am not i am not but i just wanted your opinion it's a beautiful gift cherish it some people have this gift whether it's genetic it's disposition nature perhaps nurture perhaps a combination of two both certain attitudes perspectives the way our brain functions it's a special divine gift enjoy it celebrate it and share it with others i do thank you do you just want to add do you find sometimes when you speak to people they walk away no actually uh no i mean i think there is an art it is an art you know that you can make yourself happy i think it has to do with the brain but i am an incredible i mean i believe in hashem and yeah wow but i really think people sometimes think that i not like crazy but very different because i'm always happy i mean i'm not laughing but i i see uh live with the different glasses and i'm glad to hear that you're saying that there are people like me maybe maybe you can share with us start doing a workshop in lakewood [Laughter] maybe you can share with us what do you do when you went through these these painful situations how did how did you go through it oh for instance i um i come from a very achiever family 4.0 husband is a doctor old everybody's super achiever and i gave birth to a child with special needs something that i never expected in my life so i just said okay this is how it's going to be and i look for everything that is the best for her and i am never ashamed or anything i actually make a shine and i just see life in a very positive way then you you don't suffer because this is what it's given to you and you just have to deal with you alright you embraced yeah no but i'm just saying i just want to know that i'm normal yeah yeah you're very you're very very normal yeah and coming from you saw it if you want i'll sign a paper you could show it you could show it to people okay no yes thank you god bless you god bless you you should always have what to be happy about in a revealed way it shouldn't be hard okay let's go we got so many more let's go let's go yo save you're next i really jacobson my name is josef um i am someone that works in sales jewish name joseph is a jewish name yes i work in sales and part of the my success in being able to bring paranos to my family is by my connecting to the energy around me with uh feeling the same of others and the chain of myself and my question is you say hashem loves us all unconditionally how do i i want to look for to shiva's i grew up in a family had a little touch of hamish kite shabbos meals and things like that so i'm aware that there's a brussels mahout that thinks that there's a lot going on there's a lot of doors and gates and things like that my question is how much do i need to understand in order to those days that things are not going well things are not turning into gold and things are frozen to get by in those days or to understand those days do i need to be can i just think like like you're saying hashem loves us and that's it and let it go or there are things going on and there are ways to get by obstacles yeah it's a great question if you'll allow me just to make a little correction you introduced yourself as a bakr who went to literature yeshivas etc the idea of hashem loves us has no difference if you went to litvishi yeshivas or you went to galiciani yeshivas if you went to siddhishi yeshiva so he went yeshivas i believe that every single jew no matter if you litwak or khasid says every single day avas and if you're an ashkenaz if you're ashkenaz it's even stronger avarab and haberhabami these are verses in the hebrew bible known as the tanakh with the same nusakh for litvish yeshivas and for sinishi yeshivas and for all jews i just want to emphasize this because this is something that is connected and relevant to each and every one of us no matter our background and no matter no matter what type of noosa we do no matter where we grew up i was once giving a share about this so somebody says i think this emphasis on love is your kiddish so i asked him i said you know before kriyashma which is a mitzvah we do every day made two brochures the second bracket starts with the word love how many times does the word love say in that bracha so even though he's been davening for 68 years he didn't know the answer i said don't go take a siddhar and count you'll be surprised if i'm not mistaken it says seven times love in that bracha and it's sandwiched avas oil and in middle there's another five times love before you could say yes because i think it's so fundamental to judaism to be able to have a relationship with hashem that comes from a place of positivity of celebration not from a place of guilt and negativity and he's about to punish me and he's i'm gonna burn and and i'm bad and i'm evil and he hates me and he's upset with me if i have to fix things i fix things but the foundation is always one of us it's eternal and timeless and unconditional and i think throughout all of our situations in life sometimes we don't understand things this is not an explanation sometimes things are difficult and the vicissitudes of life take us to places that we don't always want and we don't always expect and there's pain and there's grief and there are tears and there's sweat and there's blood but we have to be able to know that throughout all of it there is meaning this purpose god loves me i may not see it i may feel completely that i'm in the dark i'm confused and i don't know why and that's part of my relationship that's also part of my relationship but i should never question the fact that there is a powerful and beautiful and amazing relationship and it's not just one way it's always two ways and god is waiting for that reciprocity in terms of the details listen you know i don't know your background on what you're involved in it is always good to add and learn swarm that help us navigate challenges and the syringes and tives and different alias we read this it is good to have a queers in such swarm because they give khizuk and they give inspiration and they help us not only just say hashem loves me but really to be able to look at situations and see them from a more meaningful and and positive positive place okay remember jacob this person really wanted to ask what they asked me to ask was too emotional to ask the question so i'm gonna ask it for them i'm gonna ask their question but let's try to generalize it because it's it's their specific sorrow but no problem but when i remind myself that my father just passed away we weren't able to go to him in the last minutes it's really hard he passed away during covet how do i accept that now again that's for his situation but when a person goes through a tremendous sorrow they lose a parent they go through a divorce they they lose their business they feel so hurt they love hashem they're always connected but the pain is so real it's so overbearing how do we reconnect very important question don't try to wrap your brain around it create space for mystery create space for the fact that i don't always have the ability to figure out why what's the purpose what's the reason why would a good god want this don't reduce it to an intellectual mathematical equation it gets us nowhere people make that mistake of trying to make it fit into my brain god is infinite infinity means that my brain cannot contain it some of these things in life my brain could contain and appreciate because hashem filters it through my brain but sometimes we face realities in life like the one you just mentioned about the last moments of your father that are unfathomable why did he have to go through that he probably went through life a lot in his last moments he couldn't be surrounded by people and a lot of other horror stories that came from the corridors of hospitals and are coming out now and already came out during pesach time before probably many people you know some people i know and people who were saved the last moment because they actually didn't obey protocol and all these questions are amazing questions but i think we will not help ourselves or their souls by trying to wrap our brains around except the fact that there are things in life that are completely mysterious and when you are standing in the presence of such pain you're facing the infinite mystery of hashem that transcends my rational brain and you know what i don't have to figure it out and i could say that i can't figure this out this does not make sense to me don't force it into your brain be humble and surrender to the vulnerability of the pain be raw be real be honest be authentic just like avraham of inu screamed and they were great mom in them they were the greatest of the great moisha vram these are greatest of the great but they experienced the pain of claudius wrong and they expressed to hashem in very raw terms they didn't say oh it's good it's very good i don't get it i don't see it and these are even those people and in a way when we try to minimize it and fit it into our brain you know what we do we deprive ourselves from a relationship with hashem at that moment because a relationship with hashem means a relationship with reality and if the reality is really painful and mysterious and unfathomable it's in that pain where we're going to find truth not by minimizing it and running away from it and it's not a contradiction to a moon it means hashem has some plan some meaning here some purpose here but you know what for me it really really hurts and i could remain in that place and know that that's part of the journey where god where god wanted me i remember i was sitting shiver from my father you remember my father yesterday the alga manager now he was a character he died at the age of 70 he was a diabetic and he was a good man he was an interesting person and very he's a great personality a figure fearless he was a warrior for truth you know an interesting man he died that was sitting shiva with my siblings and my mother's alzheimer's and i'll never forget somebody came to visit me around for meredith israel and he said to me words that were so meaningful and i want to share them with you he said to me you know when you lose a father a ditch opens up in your heart and he says it's mamish like somebody digs a ditch in your dining room and every time you walk from your living room to your kitchen through the dining room you fall into the hole every single time again and again and again after a while you realize there's a ditch the ditch doesn't go away but you just learn to walk around it you see it and you look around it but once in a while you forget and you fall in again and he said when your father passes away or somebody very close a hole opens up in your heart and for the first seven days and weeks and months every time you walk by boom you're gonna be there again and he says when time passes the ditch doesn't go away you just learn to walk around it you watch it you know it very well but you walk around that you don't fall in but once in a while you forget and you go right into that ditch it was such an authentic expression of life you know people say oh time will pass you'll forget no no you move on you learn to walk around it not every time do you fall into that but that's why availus is for a year it's not cruel halakha understood that these transitions are so traumatic and so powerful to watch the earth swallow up a loved one it's not an easy trendy you know to say let's just go back to life availless is for 12 months in halacha because it takes 12 months to recalibrate your brain and really adjust to a very very new reality and i remember my nephew we were standing outside after that night after you know people come till two in the morning and one guy thought it was a shalom zohar she came two in the morning he thought it was in any case so we go outside and i tell my nephew my brother son i say you know it's the end of an error and i was crying and he says yes and it's also the beginning of a new one and it was very comforting words because the end of an error is very sad but we have to choose if it's the beginning of a new one and i would also mention one more thing everything is bahash people were upset that their parents did not have levias normal levias has paid him no shiver calls besides zoom people didn't say kaddish people couldn't darwin and people really feel bad i i got a lot of calls and a lot of emails from available they were grieving for the fact that they couldn't even grieve there were people who sat shiver themselves mummers themselves if they didn't have bigger families i have a close friend i grew up with his father died he lives in toulouse france he couldn't even come to the funeral he had to sit shiver without a minion without carthage garners before pacer he made a half a million illegal whatever just to say one scottish for his father but it's important to remember something every neshama gets exactly what it needs in order to be able to be escorted to the next world so sometimes even if in this world it doesn't look like there were people and the levia and havre kadisha nabe saquares and every soul is accompanied by exactly those who have to be there to be able to take care and bring this neshama to where it has to be my cousin shlaimaya labe died usher's cousin my cousin jacobson schleimmeier labe ben britsalo jacobson for whom this this evening's uh zoom fabregan is dedicated to he was very ill for many years and his mother called me a middle of shiva my aunt jacobson and she was crying she took care of this kid because they declared him dead years ago when he was 15 he had an aneurysm they declared him dead and she literally took him to every simcha and every bris and every pigeon had been she infused him with life and gave him dignity and she tells me she tells me why watch this i couldn't even be there at his death i couldn't be there at his death and and she couldn't forgive herself it wasn't her fault it was covert 19. and i said something that just came from my heart and it was so meaningful to her i said fagi you were in there but when his neshama went out his father who was already an islamist his father came to greet him his zeder myself his father's father ibsim and yakuba who was exiled to the gulag for 25 years for spreading yiddishkeit in stalin's cursed soviet union and died a young man he said my zeida came to greet him my bobber came to greet him what do you think you were in there but all these neshamas came from ulama emma's to greet these soul don't worry about your son you took care of him here and now let your husband take care of him there and it was very meaningful for her because it means there's a picture that sometimes we don't see so it's just important also to take that into consideration okay robert jacobson let's go we got a lot more rivky ron yep hi how are you hi thank you uh thank you so much for taking my question i'm watching as all these people are leaving and i was hoping the numbers would dwindle a lot because i'm a little stage fright but they're still a lot of fun um my question is this over the beginning of you know this whole pandemic we connected so much with hashem especially with the tragedies that were going on and it was so public and it was so you know we were able to we were able to get so much gleaned so much ammuna from it and then the whole world imploded and it we're we're practically living in a post-apocalyptical world right now and i i don't know the proper way to deal with it because i don't know if we should be ignoring it and burying our heads in the sand you can't not i you can't even just not go on to the non-jewish websites it's in all the jewish publications and i don't think it's responsible to just ignore what's going on and i don't mean to compare it to what happened by the holocaust but people were saying by the holocaust they were late they were led like sheep to the slaughter they they they didn't do anything to to try to avoid what was going on but what's what are we supposed to be doing now what is our responsibility and we're living in a world where the blatant anti-semitism is is so petrifying to watch what wasn't acceptable even five years ago is just it's it's it's so frightening and i tried to protect my kids from it and i tried to share them as much as possible but what is the proper way what what what what's our task at this point what are we supposed to do excellent question i want to share something with you in middle of the height of the coronavirus bronx in new york was hit one of the hardest neighborhoods the bronx and i was somebody sent me a clip or some some news report of a woman the chief physician of the of the corona department was interviewed one night at the end of the day there were hundreds of patients in the hospital dozens of deaths every day there was a shortage of ventilators rests ventilated which they thought then is the best thing and a shortage of nurses and a shortage of doctors and a shortage of equipment and a shortage of beds it was just absolute chaos as those of you who remember new york in the first days and weeks it was it was tight meshuggah it was it was like unbelievable it was hard to believe that we're living in 2020. and i watched this reporter turn to this chief physician and say she's ultimately responsible how are you dealing with it how are you not falling apart and she looked at him and she said words that were so meaningful she said how do i not fall apart all my medical training over the last 40 years were preparing me for this moment if i fall apart now it was all in vain and i thought she gets it and i say this to you and me and all of us everything we learned our entire lives everything we worked on everything we prayed for things we internalized there comes moments when you're called to shine there comes moments where the best in people comes out or the worst in people come out moments shakespeare said there are three types of people there are people who are born leaders there are people who grow into the role of leadership and there are people who greatness and is thrust upon them they're not born great they don't grow into greatness greatness is thrust upon them this is one of those moments i feel in history where everything we learned our whole life is for such a moment it's difficult there's a lot of uncertainty this confusion on old world is dying and a new world is emerging and that's called a moment of crisis it's a quantum leap on many different levels from a health perspective from an economic perspective from a jewish perspective as you said from a sociological perspective and perhaps for many other vantage points the worst thing to do now is to surrender to mediocrity to sit on the couch and cletch they say there are three types of people those who make things happen those who watch things happen and those guys who want to know what happened i don't want to be one of those and i don't want to watch things happen you want to make things happen this is the moment where you want to discover your great the greatest version of self and become a leader a leader for yourself for your loved ones for your community for the jewish people and for the world and i think this is a time where everybody must look deep into their soul and ask not what the jewish community can do for them but ask what they can do for the jewish people what they can do for israel what they can do for yiddish what they could do for hashem what they could do for claudius what they could do to heal the world not only from physical illness but from the timeless sickness of hatred and bigotry and anti-semitism and racism each one in their own way every person has power every person has influence no person is mediocre no person is small we have to use our money our pen our mouth our influence our connections our relationships on every single level to be able to do what jews were charged to do three thousand years ago you know what we were charged to do to be moral voices in the conversation of mankind to be the moral teachers who help the world discover their divine harmony to help the world experience healing goodness kindness and redemption we have to be a voice that is firm and refined leading voice and a humble voice conduits of the message we heard 3 300 years ago at sinai for every person that translates in a different way but this is not a time for fake humility and for mediocrity we have to seize the moment because with all the crises there are also unprecedented opportunities today the world wants to hear the genuine jewish voice and we should not duck we should represent our calling in the clearest and most emphatic and powerful way such math you want to jump in on this one [Music] i'm listening okay let's take another live question rabbi jacobson we we got him loaded tonight locked and loaded let's go next you're on hi rabbi i have a question how do you overcome and recover from like eating disorder and body dysmorphia thoughts and the obsession to exercise being that being as being a religious girl when so many religious people feel that it's important to exercise important to be healthy to stay fit how do you find that balance between being religious mentally healthy and still staying fit and physically healthy at the same time i didn't understand the question what's the contradiction i speak up a little louder i'm sorry i didn't understand no because but but it's still important to be physically fit and healthy so how do you like get over the obsession to exercise and eat healthy and be careful with what you eat if um if it interferes with being um mentally healthy and religious well maybe not understanding something behind the question so that so forgive my ignorance but it seems to me that not only are the two not a contradiction but they actually completely complement each other because exercise should never be an obsession eating healthy should not be an obsession eating healthy and exercise is part of our avoiders hashem the rambam writes and the rambam knew a thing or two about halakha in hilkha's day is perry gimmel keeping your body healthy and wholesome is one of the ways of connecting to hashem judaism doesn't see two worlds there's the world of the neshama and there's the world of the guff no ain't it everything is part of hashem the guf and the neshama so part of mental health part of being an avid hashem is hashem wants my body to be optimal and to operate on an optimal level that means my adrenaline my chemical the release of positive chemicals my general energy level should be maximized i should be able to maximize my potential as a human being as a jew as a man as a woman whatever my field of whatever field i'm in so we have to redefine these terms like exercise and eating healthy shouldn't be oh the shotgun ones my mother wants my mother my grandmother made a remark my mother-in-law is not happy i feel guilty we have to go into a different place and that is you want to live a life in which you are maximizing your inner divine potential because you are a god's ambassador and an ambassador of hashem needs to be in full form powerful physically emotionally spiritually and it all comes together so don't isolate exercise or eating healthy and becoming an obsessive thing i have to look skinny i have to look good for this one and that one yeah of course we all want to look good i would also like to lose a couple of pounds i've been working on it for many years but the point is i think look at it from a very holistic approach hashem wants a healthy soul and a healthy body yo let's keep going we got a lot more who's the next one burst you're on hi robbie y oh how you doing i have a question what's really huawei's opinion about giving kids or for that fact adults pills for whether it's adhd and depression is that a good solution or is that just putting a band-aid on the problem you know a little artificial yeah okay um i should qualify that i am not an md and i'm not a psychiatrist so really i should say that you know ask the professionals and the experts but if but but if i'm jewish how can i say that not have an opinion then you would suspect that i'm not jewish so i'm gonna gain of an opinion after saying that i really i'm not the expert in this but my opinion is not really rooted in you know 50 years of laboratory research more anecdotal but i think it's more hashicorphic rather than medical and that is these things are very very sensitive as a rule we don't want to run to medication that's not the way to go let's medicate the kid and for a few reasons first of all every medicine i shouldn't say every most medicines there's a price to pay there's side effects you know you gain in one area and you could lose khas versus another area so we just we don't want to right away rush it's always good to take everything into consideration not to say there's a problem let's medicate a child maybe there's forms of exercise martial arts swimming other hobbies maybe there's a pain maybe there's frustration maybe meditation can help maybe other forms of therapy can help maybe just being in a different environment maybe the kids need schedule maybe the kid needs sports whatever maybe the kid has issues in school that are not being addressed you know let's try to look at everything let's also try to see vitamins what type of nutrition does this child have what is his daily schedule what does his home life look like is there a lot of tension and stress and anxiety is the marriage of his parents on the rocks you know don't blame her always on right away we're running to medication maybe the house is just a very very difficult place so we want to address everything in the child's life and then when we decide there should be medication it should come from a place of clarity and empowerment and strength and the realization that it seems our piteva that this is the way to go and even then it shouldn't become you know the tactless you want to make sure you monitor you adjust and that it's not khas versalam having an effect that may even make a situation in other ways worse so it's not i wouldn't say negative or positive i think every situation you really have to address it from all angles sometimes medication saves lives and sometimes it's superfluous and sometimes it can have an opposite effect and i think we have to be very sensitive and deal with experts who look at it this way you know they're not they don't just it's very it's very disheartening when you go to experts who are one-dimensional they know one thing and everything fits into that box you know i once asked a big therapist whom i know very well i said what's the secret of your success and he told me something very profound he said most of my colleagues is very interesting says they have models that they learned in university and every patient has to fit that model and what if he doesn't you make him fit that model and you give him a label he says i never did that and i'll never do that i don't fit anybody into models every every person is our universe and i try on the contrary to take all my learning and to tune in to what is the unique condition and reality of this person and it was a very refreshing way of looking at a person that way people don't fit boxes children don't fit boxes every child is a helicale kami mal every person is a ali kim is a divine imprint if you cannot see in every person a source of inspiration it means you're not connected to your own godliness when i'm connected to my own godliness every person is inspiring because every person has the unique imprint of the reborn of shalom every person i could learn from every child has an infinite gift you can't just quarantine them into a box and this we have to always come with that larger um holistic all-encompassing approach and from there decide if if yes medication what type of medication how long how much etc etc let's go to the next question ej you're on do you hear me glad and clear okay rabbi why why first of all i will call you rebbe i've heard um probably hundreds of hours of shiam of yours there's one thing i hope double speed i hope on double speed oh no no no you find time when you need it okay mike i have two parts to a question my first question is um you express in many shirim how im sukim in in in a lot of places throughout the humish hashem loves clyostrol and that's great it's you can live off that and you can work off that but ultimately the homicide has many many situations where we bump into where if it wasn't for moshra benu i don't know what would it be with clyucero now it was like a referee in a way pushing both sides to the corner unless let's let's shake hands and make up so how do you integrate that with saying that hashem loves us unconditionally that's one my second question is clients are all came to the point where they made an eggel marsh rabbenu intervened and said it was because of you that clay israel made the ego because you gave him a lot of money yet today we are struggling with kaninahara a lot of money but we come with a package again where we suffer because we get we're the shmoozem all over the fact that we are we are getting too accustomed to luxury too accustomed to the so why is hashem give it to us again to an extent where we could suffer or we could fall to the test that's my question beautiful questions beautiful beautiful questions let me try to answer both questions i'm going to be very brief even though these questions deserve a good few good shiurim so arishin rishi what do you think you think maishrabeno came to hashem and said by the way you know you're being a little tough why don't you chill out and relax and god says okay fine i'll have an iced coffee or an ice cream in it like what's happening hashem says i want to destroy the majority no no i'm the boss say if you destroy them i'm out and god says okay you win again and again again so russia already says that hashem told maisha hanikali leave me alone i can destroy them so what does rashid say hashem said you will have to leave me alone for me to destroy them in other words if you don't leave me alone nothing is going to happen in other words hashem was intimating to moshe that there is a dual plan here if you seize the moment everything will work out well hanikali if you don't do anything you leave me alone then i'll be able to do my thing what is really going on here and the shot really is and this is very very deep there's two dimensions in our relationship with hashem it says in zoya that there are three knots in the world hashem and the jewish people so the mufasa mask it's only two knots we're connected to torah and terror is connected to hashem the answer is it's a full circle there's three nuts there is the relationship of the jewish people to hashem that goes through torah and then there is the relationship of the jewish people to hashem that is essential intrinsic unconditional unequivocal absolute timeless eternal the words of the gemara and kadusan la medv bangkok in other words it's an essential relationship like a parent to a child even if you break the turret our relationship is because there's always a not there terra allows us to actualize it to live with it and so forth so there's three knots so sometimes the relationship through one of the cycles one of the lines gets interrupted and hashem says okay we're not connected anymore they have no susqueham is the one who reveals the deeper intrinsic essential relationship that was always there so it's really two dimensions and both are very real there's a relationship that happens through toyota without that they're lost and then mushroom comes and he reveals the inner relationship which always allows the jewish people to reconnect because they're never ever really disconnected and you'll notice something that the last words of the whole torah are la ene calistro the last words and what does rashford say what's laying they call you strong that moisture broke the luchas and i ask you a question if you finished siamashas last year mr nida rashi and toysvilus writes that the gemara finishes with something out of context to finish with something positive rashy antoismus and the end of the whole hummus ends with such a negative catastrophic moment when moishe breaks delucas that's the end of the whole prayer moshe broke the titus the shot is that that brings out the ultimate ultimate depth of maishnabenu and of tara that at such a moment murshid rabbenu broke the luchas because says and this is very very powerful he says why did marsha break the luchas why didn't just give it back to hashem why break the luchas surabsaddhika kayan writes in sitka satsadek in that zip code he says something extraordinary and people sometimes i say it over and they're like what how could you say this you could look it up and sit because i thought that you don't have to believe me and by the way the commander says the same thing in question on megillah and that and the shame ishmael i think says the same thing saw that the jewish people fell down so low and he won't be able to pick them up you know why because he was on the mountain in order to pick people up you have to be in their space so you can empathize with them you could relate to them and then help them get up but he was all the way on top hashem said la great you have to go down to pick them up so what did he do he broke the luchas the gemara says in shabbos dalit people just learned it a very little while ago hamashabar caleb somebody who breaks vessels when they're angry it's a form of avail says broke the lucas in his anger kivayoko so he is now kevin but that was in a very refined way harehuka avoided etc so now he's with the jewish people and now he could lift them up and bring them back up to their innate holiness that's how the torah chooses to end all of the commission so both dimensions are very very real and very authentic it's part of the plan it's part of the relationship and both are critical to emphasize at every stage every stage in jewish history the last point i want to say to you is about prosperity listen should i tell you i i am a big hostage of the jew where we all are but i'm a very big hostage of the jewish people i think that the jewish people are amazing incredible beyond what anybody imagines and i'll tell you why when was the last time hashem spoke to us you know he spoke to us 3 300 years ago he told us to put on finland to eat kosher to celebrate shabbos not to eat onion kipper and another 610 mitzvahs that he told us then for a few hundred years he spoke to us through profits it's been around two and a half thousand years he stopped talking to us and most of that time we endured tremendous suffering and look where we are today you have eden who are stoltz all the questions here i want to speak to hashem how do you speak to hashem i'm not speaking enough i'm speaking too much how do i give a deeper relationship thousands of years later jews are still jews they're trying to grow they're trying to be better they're trying to make a kid hashem each one in their own way this is an incredible incredible nation i believe hashem gave us prosperity in this generation because we were tested with every type of nissanian in the world and in this generation hashem says you know what i want you should have prosperity and show me that you take prosperity and instead of becoming arrogant and pompous and selfish you use your prosperity to help to build a beautiful world to build beautiful communities to build beautiful homes to build beautiful families to help people in need to give sadaqa and khasa to do them to bring goodness and terror and yiddishkai thank dushan godliness to the world do some of us make mistakes of course some of us uh pompous and arrogant uh probably two or three people do some of us misuse our money of course should we try to mend our ways of course but generally speaking i spoke to uh somebody who's a jew and he made a few billion dollars and i asked him why do you want to why do you make why do you why are you so ambitious to make so much money and in a moment of vulnerability he said it's a good question and if i look deep deep down into myself said i like to have money it's it's i appreciate it but i really i want to do big things in this world and i thought you know i think there's a deep kadusa in jewish money so i say let jews have a lot of money let jews have all the prosperity in the world remember we're getting close to the gula what do you think the world is going to be like the rambam says all the delicacies will be as common as dust prosperity will be infinite so this is the preparation to live with and to use to build a yiddish kite and a world that is filled with archava and kedusha okay robert jacobson we have a lot more questions i'm going to try again to put on the speed is that okay with you okay let's do this my question is like this taking a little bit of a turn towards kids what could you advise me to stay strong and positive in a situation where i'm watching my own child deteriorating in ruchnius and in gosh miss on a daily basis how could i get to the point where i say thank you hashem and truly believe this is the best thing for me instead of crying and feeling so heavy all the time i have about 10 questions in this version this is a painful question this is a painful question very painful question and it's not easy to answer and don't think that my answer is just coming you know off the cuff it's coming with tears and reflection and thoughtfulness and quite a lot of experience in this area and different communities and different situations the first thing is it's very painful to watch acknowledge that it's not an easy thing for a father and a mother to watch a child deteriorating physically and spiritually it's very very hard and give yourself a standing ovation and i'm giving you for maintaining balance perspective love equilibrium and not allowing it to just overwhelm you and put you in the dumps emotionally that's number one give yourself a standing ovation because you're going through a lot this is a big test that many parents have today as they say from the best of my spochas from the best families here i live in muncie in lakewood in williamsburg in borough park in crown heights in chicago and toronto your shelian stamford hill and gold is greed in every beautiful jewish community in the world khasidisha communities and literature communities and yeshiva communities and modern orthodox communities and very issues communities and very sustaination communities all demographics all cahillas nobody nobody is exonerated from this and parents are going through a tremendous amount and i want to take to each and every one of you you are unsung heroes because i know this is not an easy parsha and a lot of you are doing amazing things with this test that you did not imagine would be part of your life when these cute little angels are being born a few pieces of advice the first thing is it's extremely important not to detach from your child emotionally it's sometimes easy to detach you're not my son get out of my house go find a lot now sometimes it's important for the child to get out of the house get a job become independent but never khash vishalim expulsion sever the courts you're not part of our family you're a bush of our family these children need you more than any other child or at least as much as any other child you hold on to that bond you don't sever cords you don't because the pain of losing your relationship with a child is more painful than anything else in the world listen to what i'm saying and i know there are people who say they're not disown them maybe there are some exceptions ninety-nine point nine percent of cases you hold on to these children and you hold on to a relationship whatever it takes conversations go go to a game hang out together go horseback riding go hiking go for pizza just schmooze have fun listen do things together even things that may be on your own you would not do but it's so important to maintain a very deep relationship with the children as much as possible number two don't take it personal don't make it a conflict between my child and me i'm the father i'm the mother i'm a banter i'm a talmud how do you do this to me and you get angry at the child and it becomes a personal vendetta you know why because then you can't be there for your child you're responding from your own pain and from your own anger from your own frustration it's painful and it's important to have people to speak to you could cry you could cry to hashem you could cry to your spouse it's important that spouses should talk about these things very open and vulnerable and they should be able to share with each other but remember these children don't belong to you they belong to hashem hashem gave you these diamonds as a pikadin to nurture them love them polish them educate them and help them it's not personal i'm a shliyak of the reborn shalom he gave me this neshama to be able to love it embrace it help it polish it and make it blossom that's my role and in every situation i'm going to find a way to bring in light into this situation don't come from a place of helplessness and despair every day is a new day and ask yourself what is my mission today when it comes to this child and try to follow it and never give up hope you got to believe in the infinite light and godliness of each one of these children next don't allow social conformity to dictate behavior supposed if he comes here if he comes to the simcha if he comes to the bar mitzvah if i take him out of this school and put him in this school what are they going to say what are the shah khan i'm going to say what are the neighbors going to say such a beautiful family all my kids made us see in mashaas how can i don't live in that space too much pressure it's a fake world they don't even care about you you gotta do what's good for your child's soul don't sell him and don't sacrifice him on the altar of social conformity next depends where your child is in life sometimes discipline is the best thing for him he needs a structure he needs a discipline and that's the healthiest thing for him sometimes it's stage four spiritual cancer and then you have to readjust you have to know where your child is in the levels of deterioration because if mummas depends how old he is or she is and where they are in their deterioration because the approach may be opposite in different ways finally don't be afraid of being a parent children need parents and parents are there to create guidelines and laws and structures that are helpful for the children again depends what age they are and depends where they are in life so every situation is very very different but these are some guidelines and principles that may be somewhat helpful beautiful robert jackson really beautiful let's take the next live question over here we have about five more live questions and we have about 75 more questions we can't cover all them we're going to try to cop as much as we could okay okay um sean robert jacobson um it's been i really appreciated your wisdom tonight it's been very appreciated um my question goes back to your earlier words about avastilla loves us my question basically is that um the implication seems to be that even if we don't keep up our side of the deal up to par at least um he still wants a relationship with us and and it doesn't we have absolutely registration i don't want to let me read more the brahman writes if you don't do a proper chuba the ebola takes you to your t-list and he rips them up the emotion takes you misses he says i don't want them how do we square that with your your message that you're that's resounding that you understand wants that and even if you don't even if you're not doing everything you should be doing eastern still wants relationship with us yeah if you look through every navi yoshaya swag including the naveen we're reading now in the class of the paranissa there are such sharp words never mind the tiger of kisawa but you'll see at the end of every single nervous either after one periodic or three procurement five program there'll always be a message after everything said and done as the ghazal say hits i call in mahem enam cullen my arrows will end they will never ever be obliterated why not why not at some point it's a breaking point they call it the tipping point you know what i mean it's over i tried i tried i tried i tried the marriage is not working get divorced so the navi says aye safety chris's imran there's no divorce desire he says i am in love with them the maharal of prague into pharaoh's sister all i think pedigree why is there no biography for avraham avinu to explain why hashem chose him is a biography of a little biography he saved people in three situations every person hashem chose episode biography tell me abraham was a good guy at sadiq nothing the torah is silent you know the ramban's question you know what the morale's answer is if there would be a biography of how good of rama venue is you would think that's the condition of why you're a jew so if i don't live up to those standards i'm not hashem says no the relationship is essential because it's atsumiba atsumi it's my essence is one with your essence he picked us up from all the languages he said he lifted us up mikhail is showing us there's no language that can describe how deep the connection is on the contrary the reason hashem is so hurt by all that available the reason why the naveem are so sharp that anovi ahmed he said and i'll quote s you i loved in an incredible way and that's why every sin is a stab in the chest if i leave the country for three months and i don't tell anybody you're not going to get upset at me my wife is going to get very upset at me why because we have such a close relationship a jew when he doesn't have veda when a jew disobeys and separates himself from the rats in hashem it's like a stab in the chest it's my child it's my spouse it's the person i loved so much it hurts hashem says every aveda when you see this you have to see all the harsh words are all coming only because there's such potential because there's such beauty because you're dealing here with a nuclear relationship you're dealing here with energy that is nuclear the jewish people are the vortex between heaven and earth they are the ambassadors that represent god in this world the navy says you're my witnesses that's where anti-semitism comes from kill the jew and you're killing god the jew represents hashem so the the power the potential is so deep and when it's betrayed it's so painful so when you see this it's all part of that same oneness and love that vibrates and it's a pity that people think this is my kiddush [Laughter] people always email me you said in a shear that god loves us really i said i said how many times does it say in navi and in ghazal this is my hidden people think that the basic standard path of judaism is that god default mode is pretty negative he's angry if you mummish an awesome tsaddik then maybe he's going to love you a little bit if you become like avraham of india god says okay you're a nice guy i love you it's mama's the opposite okay let's go a few let's can we copyright a few more evan jacobson you're good two more you're on rsf hi um i just wanted to ask a question uh for rabonim and maybe rebellion as well uh there's so much to focus on in giving people what they need during this time with the uncertainty and the diseases and the protests and and you know uncertainty on political uh you know things and problems with connection because they don't have shoes and problems you know with uh with social issues there's so much to focus on almost always you have to choose a few things to be able to get them across in the right way what are the top three things you would advise a rov to give or to focus on building within this community during this time um my question is more for rav the rabbi would like to introduce also with regards to remain um the first thing is shalom bias help people in their marriages this is the key today it is critical that people learn how to create functional and loving marriages find out what works in a loving marriage and what works what's happening in a dysfunctional marriage especially when everybody is home and quarantine is uh once again at least in many communities pretty popular not everywhere and people are with each other it's so important that homes have a positive energy and that can only come if the marriage is good it doesn't mean you have to agree with your husband about everything if yes you're probably not jewish it does mean not that we have to agree but we have to be here for each other we have to support each other we have to trust each other i have to know my wife has my back a thousand percent my wife has to know that i have her back a thousand percent this is so critical this is a time to spend time with your spouse take walks work out your issues because it's a critical time and the harmony in the home is very very important that's number one number two is to be able to be there for our children children are going through a lot we still don't know what the corona did for kids especially i should mention the impacts of technology being on screens for hours and hours and hours every day even though we are now on screens as well so i don't want to sound hypocritical and i'm on a screen a nice amount of the day some of you know very well but we have to know the impact of screen addictions of gaming addictions of all different types of websites that's just something else to mention it's very important to be here for children every child individually to make sure they have what they need physically emotionally psychologically spiritually and this is very much for obeying especially parents and obeying educators and mentors and the third thing i would say is i say to all of you don't be stingy with love this is a time to empower people people are facing uncertainty confusion economic stress existential anxiety religious anxiety spiritual anxiety people have faced a lot of pain as we have heard from many of the telephones don't be stingy with warmth and love and passion one of you can kindle sparks embrace hearts lift up in the summers empower minds don't say i'm a small insignificant guy i'm just trying to survive in lakewood or muncie or bara park to quote the words of navi in your eyes you may be insignificant and inconsequential in the rewind of shalom's eyes you're a prince you're an ambassador you're a leader you're a king you have unbelievable coyotes i say today everybody has a schliches today to empower people in every conceivable way that you can be creative with your love and not stingy beautiful jacobson let's take one more question and then afterwards we'll go to closing when is tikkun khatsoyz ah 1 30 too shiny ron hi thank you so much it's really nice so far um okay so i'm 19 years old and i still live with my parents and their house um and for the past like bunch years of my life i was real i'm really depressed and have a hard time um [Music] so far i've found the so far i found the approach of like medication therapy and everything through the years um right now i just like i'm still depressed and i feel stuck and i feel like the things i have to do for myself might hurt the people around me how do i balance that for myself and like hurting my head why doing what you need is going to hurt people what what what do you need that can hurt people i'm just trying to understand um moving out of my parents house maybe taking being a little selfish here and there not helping out not giving as much just because i feel like i need to do things for myself okay as long as you're being guided by somebody who wants you to be successful and somebody who's wise and kind and perceptive and respects the relationship between parents and children then you don't have to worry about it kayaking every person must first and foremost take care of themselves not because we believe in selfishness but because if i'm a smarter i won't be able to help anybody in order for me to be able imagine a hot solar driver he's driving his ambulance to the hospital taking the passenger the the patient to the hospital and there's no gas and he says oh i don't have time to fill up my gas tank with gas i'm busy saving lives if you don't have gas in your vehicle you're not going to be able to save lives if i don't have self-esteem if i'm not happy with myself i'm not going to be able to give to anybody all i'll give is out of misery and guilt so investing in yourself is not selfish investing in yourself is building a powerhouse of somebody who'll be able to give and give and give more don't see it as a contradiction just make sure you're being guided by somebody who really cares for you who wants you to be successful who wants you to have a good relationship with your family and doesn't have some strange ideas about separating you from your family unless it's necessary if it's very abusive but it doesn't sound like it and then the time you're investing in yourself figuring out your life becoming independent taking responsibility believing in yourself that's not selfish that's things that are going to help you come back with more vigor and more clarity but make sure you're getting guidance from people or a person who really wants to see you thrive and is not just busy you know talking negatively about this one or that one but really wants to see you shine you're probably jackson okay let's go to closing now we'll say some closing remarks i wonder first again thank god you're susan jacobson rabbi yy for coming on tonight and giving us so much physical tonight i have to be honest with you i we never had so many live questions it was non-stop i am sorry for all the people that wanted to ask are on the waiting list and people that email questions we didn't get to jacobsen uh let me know when you're available you got to come back for round two we do it in company thank you thank you for this you what what an unbelievable beautiful crowd all the questions the live questions i saw a lot of emails that came in thank you everybody for being so open and sharing it's very meaningful at 1202 at night you have 520 people sitting here you have tonight over 16 1700 people came out to the church it's um it's mind-blowing to see this i want to tell everybody here tonight that's watching next week we're going to have an amazing program absolutely will be coming on discussing faith from the ground up from beginning stages how to really grow on high levels is going to be an amazing program i really advise everybody to please come and join again i want to thank all of our sponsors uh my cousin rahmeel or jacobson for sponsoring tonight thank you rahmael yeah thank you rahul it's close from his brother and so from our cousin should have an amazing huge aliyah from all the hundreds of people that were tonight from this year i think was really i think it was a tremendous physique for me i felt everybody here tonight should know that everything is recorded it's going to be available on www.menachanberfo.com we're going to send out an email to everybody who came here tonight with all the information if anybody has any questions forever jacobson or anything please send an email to coachmanathum gmail.com we'll forward it to him and we'll be in touch with him again i want to thank our sponsors the advertising sponsors lakewood school for promoting us here in lakewood again to robbie and yaniv from kazakh always pushing us and their programmers they have programs for singles to couples millennials baby boomers church seniors kazakh offers programming to all and uh please check kazakh.org for more and coach menachem please give closing remarks i want to thank you rabbi jacobson who is unbelievable powerful and clear and from listening what's going on you have people here who were thinking one way for 35 40 45 50 years and today they heard that there is they could change a little bit of the way they think with the neuroplasticity metabissell and the positive to understand to look at it from a different way and like you finished off um very important to fill up your tank and even before relationship with hashem what's your own relationship with yourself to stop thinking it's not going to be easy you know if you're thinking this way for many years obviously it's not going to be easy but number one to be aware that's the first thing to be to be able to change and every day step by step so thank you again and uh for everything you do every jacobson for your claudia throw and i want to thank everyone for coming on wish her again for this beautiful job you did tonight trying to try to manage it osha is the best you're the best can i give a close can i give a closing statement oh i stopped at it the program is over already now we're just moving now jacob's in the final closing is you please leave the island with somehow yeah i'm going to share with you a beautiful vart i saw recently and i loved it so much and i think it's very apropos especially that it's the parsha of next week it says we say it every every day a few times a day so rashid says what's behola with your whole heart so one of the explanations is i quote shalom your heart shouldn't be in a fight with hashem you should get along with hashem so the holy rabbi aaron of carlin of aaron hagadol of carlin asked why does russia use the word hamakom he should use the word that the persecution why the word on the place on the space it's one of the names of hashem but why is it used there and the holy baron of kalin says that there's a very profound message here in life don't let your heart fight with the makkah with the space in which you find yourself in life so much of our mental energy is often invested in fighting my space if i would have only been born to such a family if i would have only grown up in lakewood or not in lakewood if i would have only been by such a father by such a rebbe by such a yeshiva if i would have only married such a man or such a woman if i would only had such a family if i would have these genes if i would have these looks if i would have these parents if i would have these opportunities if i would only live here or live there then life would be beautiful and half my life i'm busy arguing with my place my geographical space and my emotional psychological space the beginning of development and transformation happens when i could make peace with my mocking with my space in life to realize that wherever i am is exactly where i'm supposed to be because this is the path for me to reach my ultimate greatness and light that's why hashem tells moisha you have to find the holiness in the space where you're standing right now i tell myself tomorrow next year when i change when this happens when my kids live like that then i'm going to find happiness no hamak right here is your schlisses right now is your slickest these challenges these circumstances are each opportunities for you to be able to cultivate your own deepest infinite light and even though it's a difficult space i'm in i'm dealing with anxiety i'm dealing with stress and i'm dealing with thoughts and i'm dealing with pressure i'm dealing with a married i'm dealing with children i'm dealing with partners i'm dealing with whatever it is that's the mukhim don't fight it tomorrow maybe i'm going to go to another mukhlam a person should always try to improve their life but if this is the space you're in right now it's from this space psychologically and physically in which you're going to be able to discover your ultimate light and glory in life thank you very much thank you everybody we'll see you next week sunday night 10 o'clock why why good night thank you this class is brought to you by the yeshiva.net please help us continue the classes make even a small contribution at www dot the yeshiva.net donate