Basics of Emunah #35: Rabbi YY Jacobson Answering Bais Yaakov Girls

the yeshiva.net so good evening project light good evening all the distinguished esteemed and special girls of basiaco from all across the country and i don't know if you're from all across the world wherever you're from or any school you're from any city region i thank you so much for inviting me to be here with you this evening one of your special project light programs and i assume your mission statement as your name indicates is a project to spread light to cast light to this disseminate light wherever you can i love the name and i love the mission statement and i'll tell you why i don't know if you realize this when you chose the name but if you remember the first thing what's the first creation that hashem creates it says the beginning beratious barolo kim as in the opening of khumash in the beginning hashem created heaven and earth so that's a general statement and then it says the earth was empty and void and darkness full of darkness and the spirit of hashem hovered over the water and then what was the first creation hashem said let there be light and there was light and there's a very famous question the purpose of light what's the purpose of light purpose of light is that creatures should be able to see trees use light for photosynthesis they convert sunlight into glucose into sugar we use light in order to be able to see in order to be able to have heat in order to be able to have warmth and all of the other benefits that come from the sun in terms of produce and vegetation animals of course need light so if we would live in a world of darkness we wouldn't be able to survive because light is so important and vital for existence but if so why was it the first creation light serves everything else so it should have been created together or after the other things or creatures were created and they needed light so then hashem creates light but that's not what the terrorist says the first thing is you hear and one of the explanations is because before you start a project you have to know your mission statement you have to know your purpose what's your purpose before you build a home before you build a company before you build a family before you build a corporation before you build an organization before you build a website before you build anything what's the purpose what's the tactless what's your mission statement it's critical so now the question is beresha's borough of the communist versailles what's the mission statement why for what foreign the first thing is the idea the plan the project's purpose is let there be light their job is a universe that we will light up here and that's where the human being comes in because we're the ones who can light up the world in hebrew comes from the word concealment because the light is concealed and our job is to reveal the light in people to reveal the light in ourselves to reveal the light in the universe because everything has light everything is filled with light everything is an aspect of hashem's light but it can be concealed i may not be able to see it the first mission statement of everything is what's the world project light so your project is really a continuation of the project of existence which was all about ye here let there be light every moment of the day and the night you and i and we and all of us have an opportunity to answer one question will i create light in this moment or god forbid not any situation you're in any relationship any conversation any encounter any circumstances with yourself or with others are you always answering one question will i bring light into this moment will i bring light into this relationship will i bring light into this experience will i bring light into this this counter or shalom not so your project is really the project of history the project of existence and may you continue to spread so much light to yourselves to your families to your friends to your communities to all of the jewish people and to the whole world because heaven knows we can use we can use some light these days so the structure of the evening is i'm going to speak for uh some time i think we'll be like 20 minutes 25 minutes about some ideas connected to the truth of yiddish the foundations of judaism and then we come to the more exciting part which is questions and answers or at least dialogue an exchange of ideas and you can either mute yourself and ask your question or put it on chat as you wish whatever is more comfortable for you i think it's so important at the onset of our conversation to really state something that it may be obvious to some and that's fine if we hear it again but it's also not obvious to some and that's why i want to emphasize it it's so important to get down to the basics of what is yiddish what is it well we all know what it is there's torah there's mitzvahs it's a lifestyle it's a culture it's full of laws and commandments it's what we eat and what we don't eat and how we dress and how we live and shabbos and yam tiff and all different types of halachas that guide us and a way of life that guides us it and that's all of course 100 true the structures of yiddish guide which all of you have been privy to learn and be grow with it and be educated with it growing up in homes filled with yiddish guy judaism tyria mitzvos and you're a minority of the jewish people as you know because most of our brothers and sisters the world over have not received a jewish education and even those who have received something it's often very minimal but many are so unaffiliated they don't even know much of the basics of judaism so that's all in terms of the structure of the lifestyle you all know the difference between pesach and schwarz and sukkos and purim and tubesvat and that's already more than most of our brothers and sisters who don't know the difference between the two i may not even know a word of the hebrew language but what i want to go is one step deeper what is behind all of it what is the neshama vydersky what is the soul of it all now of course this is a topic that we can expand upon but i just want to touch on a few points of what yiddishkai teaches what are the some of the insiders the foundations of judaism why is it something that we embrace with love with passion why is it something that i hold dear why is it something that you would hold dear why is it something that you want to bequeath to your children hashem at the right time to your grandchildren why is it something that we fought for and sacrificed a lot for over the generations do you say how you say this the foundation of all foundations is that either is here to teach us ms truth we want truth and only truth and nothing but the truth often we grow up and we ask questions and we don't get answers for those questions and we come to believe that everything we're taught is just traditions and much of it can be bobomysis and fabrications and it's just taught you know because that's the culture of our people but as we say every as we say in davoning and then in the expression is ms the essence of torah is that it's tyrus ms it's a toy of emis it's a toad of truth the possibility says hashem eli kim ms we finish krishna every day ani hashem ms vyatsiv the word amen means ms you say amen means affirmed ms it's true ms vyatsev it's real it's authentic and this is so important to understand the reason jews preserve the ideskait and embrace yiddishkait is because of their conviction that this is true it's not a baba myself it's really true in other words judaism is teaching us the truth of reality the truth of existence and that's why the jewish people are not afraid of questions because if you believe something is true you don't have to be afraid of questions i only have to be afraid of questions if i am afraid that it may be a lie if something may be a lie then i'm afraid if you ask me questions because you may expose the lie but when something is true you're not afraid of investigation imagine you have a company that's fraudulent it's fake fake news you're not going to want to open the books you don't want anybody should investigate your company because they may find some very illegal stuff there but if you know that you're legit you don't care if somebody investigates you don't care if somebody goes through the books you don't care if somebody scrutinizes the situation you know why you've got nothing to hide it's true whenever you have a religion or a philosophy that's not true you're afraid of investigation but when you have the ms you're never afraid of any questions you can investigate you could look at it you could you can review it it's not going to diminish it because when you got the answers you're not afraid of the questions that's what confidence is when i know that this is true if i tell you that last night i was in australia and it's not true then i'm afraid if you ask me too many questions because you may catch me by the lie oh i saw you at a wedding last night oh it was my copy but somebody said that australia is on lockdown oh they made an exception for me you get it i'm going to get stuck because when you lie you get stuck at some point but if i really was in australia last night i was not by the way but if i really was in australia last night you can ask me a thousand questions you can ask me a million questions you can ask me a billion questions i don't mind you know why because i was there you can ask me everything i'm not afraid that reality is going to undermine my statements that you're going to find a contradiction you know why i'm not afraid because i was there and once i was once i know i was there i'm not afraid i'm not scared i'm not afraid that's why the jewish people and the great jews jewish leaders and scholars of all the generations were never afraid you can investigate you could go deeper you can ask every question in the world we're never terrified you know why we were there it's real it's authentic we're not selling the brooklyn bridge we're not selling the george washington bridge we're not even selling the tappan zee bridge or the williamsburg bridge if i'm selling bridges and i'm concocting stories and i'm fabricating bubba mices and inventing tales i shun away from questions but if it's ms if it's authentic i got nothing to be scared of and this is something i want all of you girls to understand that the greatest minds and hearts of the jewish people for three and a half thousand years were not busy sacrificing their life for something that their grandmother decided when she made chicken soup and invented a couple of stories and passed it on with the goggle muggle and the apple sauce and the jalapenos and the eggs and the liver and shabbos and the khala and therefore we're preserving it with so much sacrifice there's the reason the jews observed 630 meters of the toyota for three and a half thousand years through thick and thin sometimes very beautiful tranquil periods of time but sometimes very tumultuous and difficult and agonizing periods of time is only one reason because they knew this is true this is worth fighting for this is worth preserving because it's real it's as real as it gets is telling you the truth is telling you the truth about life it's telling you the truth about existence it's telling you the truth about the world telling you the truth about yourself that's the most important thing it's telling you the ms about who you are about what life is what what what the meaning of life is what's before birth what's after death what life is all about what the world is all about what our aim what our goal is and who we are as individuals and as part of a collective yiddish is the gift of truth in the world and that's why we're never afraid of questions we're never afraid of investigation we're never afraid of scrutiny i know that some people are they may not be secure they may not be comfortable it may not have been the way they were educated and that's fine there's so many different types of people and we have to respect and give space for all of them but i want all of you to know because i know some of you are very intelligent and some of you are out of the box you warned me that some of you guys are out of the box you remember somebody emailed me so i just always want you to know this because i get so many emails from girls we ask our questions and nobody can answer are there no answers i'm completely confused i want you to know maybe not everybody can answer every question and of course there are questions in life that are not easily answerable and maybe unanswerable life is filled with mystery but the fact that we accept yiddishkait is not based on a cultish-blind faith because all of us have been brainwashed by our mommies and tatis and besyakov teachers and rebbies and mechanicals and moroes and and rashashivas and rebus and sadikim and rabbis and rabbitsons and and fear and muster speeches and we're afraid we were sold you know we were sold a pound of challenge about ghanaian and purgatory and therefore all frightened and that's why we accept it and it has undo with emma's we would have thrown that out a long time ago we would have cast it away a long time ago yiddish kite is based completely on ms and nothing but the truth you'll say but there's politics and there's corruption and there's stupidity and some schools don't know what they're doing and some schools do know what they're doing and some educators are ignorant and some educators are brilliant yeah people are ignorant and people are brilliant people are secure and people are insecure some people are nice and some people are not so nice some people are very compassionate and some people a little more aggressive that's all part of the human condition that's why we need project light to be able to reveal light but i want all of you girls to understand that what yiddish guide has to give you in life is truth ms and that's even deeper than reward and punishment because you don't want to be living a lie you always want to look for the truth there's nothing as powerful as meaningful as inspirational and as liberating as the truth and only the truth and nothing but the truth which brings me now to another fundamental point i want to share i spoke about truth and i want to speak about love truth and love you know why i speak about these two things because in their terror they're always mentioned together not always but very often right full of love and full of truth we have the expression assay modi for emes do with me la kindness which is love and truth we have an expression tyrus emes and tyrus hasset right tyrus emma's terrorist and you all know friday night we say ross and the two are not two separate terrorists it's the same tyre real truth is real love and real love is real truth terror is a terror of truth and it's a terror of love we spoke a few moments about truth now let's speak a few moments about love sometimes we are under the impression that the mitzvahs and the laws and the halachas of torah are here hashem to stifle us or to repress us or to limit us and to restrict us and i think it's so important girls and i hope each and every one of you can internalize the following words i'm going to share with you and teach it to your siblings and to your friends and to your classmates and to people who are not here this evening and not just now but i mean in the future of your lives and that is this the foundation of yiddish kite is as the navi malachi says he was the last prophet shem says i love you and i love you with an unconditional unwavering absolute love the love is non-negotiable the love is eternal the love is timeless you're my child god willing one day you're going to be blessed with children the love to a child never ever dissipates sometimes your child behaves beautifully sometimes the child makes a mess in the house sometimes the child behaves inappropriately but you don't tell your child you didn't behave nicely i'm not your mommy anymore and if you do say that to your child you need emergency help a functional healthy father and mother know that the relationship is absolute there's nothing that can affect it or weaken it even if there's pain and even if there's disappointment i mean even if there's disagreement those of you who have hopefully you grew up in healthy and loving homes or fathers and mothers even though your parents are not perfect you're also not perfect you know that i hope your parents are not perfect but you're also not perfect believe it or not but the love the love is always there so the basis of everything is that hashem loves you and hashem is your biggest fan and hashem is your biggest supporter and hashem is cheering you on and your buddhism wants to see you successful in life like a mother like a father you want your child to grow and blossom and be happy you want your child to flex his muscles and maximize his or her potential and live life to the fullest physically emotionally spiritually psychologically on every level you want your children to be successful to be happy to be filled with simica to be filled with menuha and there's never a moment you get jealous of your child or you want to take revenge of your child or you want to become vengeful and you get angry to the point that you cut them off no even when you may discipline your child or you may be stern with your child if you're a healthy parent it's all coming because you care because you love them because there's a very powerful relationship every single thing that terror tells us about how to live never ever should you think that it's here to crush a person or to punish a person or to penalize a person hashem's love to each and every one of you each and every one of us is infinite desire says rip shimon says that if a person would know how much hashem loves him he would run after hashem faster and with more ferociousness than a lioness runs after her prey the balsham have said that hashem's love for every jew is deeper and profounder than the love of parents to a ben yacht to an only child who was born when they were already older and they did not think they can have children any longer and then they were blessed with one single child you can only imagine the powerful intense affection that they harbor towards this child says the balchemt of even that is an inadequate metaphor to describe the intense love that the ribena shalom has to every single jew no matter who you are and where you are no matter whether you made mistakes in life and even if you made serious mistakes in life what is more the basis of yiddishkeit is that every person is a piece of hashem tanya is a helicopter he adds the word mamish your soul is a piece of hashem it's a fragment of the divine it's a ray of infinity it's a piece of heaven so at your core you are hashem's light in this world you are his manifestation in this world you're never separated you can't be separated at your deepest core you are divine you're a shtickle you're a piece of god so to speak and that also means that at your core you're invincible you're indestructible just like nobody can destroy hashem nobody can destroy you and even if you experience pain in your life and even if you experience trauma and even if you're dealing with anxiety or stress or a mood disorder or a personality disorder and even if you face struggles and even if you were given some challenges or you have challenges in your life that are not easy to deal with never ever think for a moment that you are essentially flawed or blemished that you're unworthy that you're undeserving don't allow self-loathing and self-shame to characterize your life always tune into the truth that you are a piece of hashem and therefore at your core you're wholesome you're perfect you're beautiful your glow is infinite you're holy you're sacred you're full of possibility and full of confidence and full of strength you're indestructible mamash nobody can take away that confidence from you and all the pain that you're dealing with all the pain i'm dealing with is inside of me but it's not me i contain it it does not contain me it's inside of me this is the foundation of foundations and girls there's another very important thing to understand all of mitzvos was given by the creator of the world in order to help you achieve and live the best life possible never think of in terms of a tool to crush people or stifle people or hold people and check so they don't express themselves hashem wants every person to express themselves fully if you have a talent if you have a gift if you have a resource he wants you to live it out and express it and use it to bring light to the world project light because if you were given a talent and a gift why did he give it to you just to waste just to suppress it just to make believe you don't have it just to get frustrated no because this is part of your schlichtas every single soul was sent down with exactly the energies the faculties the resources the gifts the blessings the capabilities and the attributes and the characteristics and the challenges that it needs in order to be able to fulfill its mission in this world nothing is wasted no person and no faculty and not a moment so what you have is exactly what you need to have in order to be able to be a conduit for hashem's light in the world in the way that only you can be that conduit and all of terror mitzvahs is a blueprint from the creator of the world to help you live your life to the fullest to help you suck the marrow out of life and to be able to be the calmest and happiest person possible sometimes a mitzvah may challenge me but challenging me doesn't mean hurting me challenging me me means helping me go deeper into me so i can discover my inner energies and my inner resources even when the terrorist says don't do something it's like a nutritionist telling me rabbi why why don't eat this food i say but i want to eat this food he says yes but it's not good for your blood type and it's not good for your makeup and it's not good for your brain i say but i want to he says you may want to externally but deep down if you want to be healthy and live you probably don't want to even if you're tempted to do it sometimes the terrorist says don't do this or do this i say i'm not in the mood i'm not interested don't force me don't tell me what to do but we have to remember if it's a direction from hashem it's always here because this is not good for my blood type it's not good for my soul even if it sounds good right now but it could be undermining me short term or long term so when i say no it's not because i'm a repressed person it's because i want to live with inner wisdom and inner truth and maximize my life who knows the brain of a person who knows the brain today neuroscientists are beginning to discover how incredibly complex the brain is and we still haven't scratched the surface of what exists in that little jello which is two or three pounds called the human brain it's incredible what exists in that brain it's mummish the more you study about the brain the more you can go crazy in that little piece of jell-o it seems so insignificant you have the central nervous system controlling 70 trillion cells making sure the body is functioning and operating in all of its systems to the maximum degree a human organism is not just a little machine it's a universe it's mama's a universe what goes on there between the circulatory system the digestive system the urinary system all of the other the nine systems that exist in the human body it's it's incredible and it's all in the brain it's all directed and guided by that brain which is of course alive because of the divine the soul the kios hashem's energy that vivifies and animates the body so we don't even begin to know what exists in the brain just mamash mamash incredible but the author of the brain he knows what the brain is like who is reno he knows what that brain is like he knows me in the best way and he gave a manual a user's manual how to use this brain in a way that you will maximize it protect it from damage and make sure you use this life in the best possible way you know when you buy a phone you buy a computer or you buy a refrigerator or you buy a vacuum cleaner you buy a laptop it comes with a user's manual the one who created the product tells you don't put it on the radiator don't let it fall into the pool make sure it's not placed in a pl make sure it's not it's not placed in a it's not put in a place where it's going to get too hot or too cold why is he mixing in he's not mixing in he knows the machine and he wants you to make sure that this machine is used and you can enjoy it for a long time in the most optimal way you shouldn't damage it this is even a physical machine the brain also has a manual and we need a manual because it's very confusing life is confusing that's the torah the torah is the manual of the author of the brain and the author of every brain and the author of life and the author of the cosmos the author of the universe and the author of history who says listen i know you i created you i created each one of those cells i created each one of those hundred billion neural pathways and hundred billion nerves neurons nerve cells and neurons i created them i designed them i placed them here is the blueprint here is the manual here is the roadmap for you to be able to know that this is too sensitive make sure it doesn't go to certain places make sure you don't find it in certain places if you want to preserve it this is what you should do with it this is what you should not do with it this is the manual when i read this manual from my laptop when i read a manual for this little tsatsuka i don't get upset who does this guy think he is to tell me that i should not put the computer in my bathtub i wanna take put him in the bathtub listen you could do what you want but you're not gonna have a computer anymore that's how we have to appreciate the terror as well it's the manual of the author of life to be able to help us take our lives and utilize it in the most beautiful and exciting way to be able to live a life filled with joy filled with serenity filled with happiness filled with fulfillment filled with inspiration filled with resilience so that each of us can enjoy life to the fullest thank you very much did so thank you um can you go to questions now sure do you mind reading reading the questions you could just read question by question um you said it was a long question i skipped the long ones okay how can we know the terror is true how can we trust the torah that's a beautiful and wonderful question i'm going to give you one answer we could discuss this for a long time but i want to give you one and very very brief answer okay if somebody comes tonight to all of us somebody gets up on zoom his name is mr finkelstein and he says tomorrow morning girls the sun is going to set the sun is going to rise in the west and it's going to set in the east we'll probably look at him and say you cuckoo you know what happens tomorrow the sun rises in the west and sets in the east we're gonna like um that's weird that's weird okay so maybe this guy is privy to some information maybe there's some scientific explanation that i don't know once in 5 781 years the sons of some reason is rising on one of the opposite direction maybe the earth has to do with the spin of the earth the orbit of the earth i don't know i don't know but it's it's weird okay well maybe the guy is really you know he's insane and some weird luck he had you know okay what happens if this happens again he does this again and again and again at some point i'm gonna start wondering if this man is not privy to some information that nobody else has what i just described to you happens in the torah okay the terror is written thousands of years ago whatever you believe about the torah even if you want to say devil's advocate it was written by some people it was written by moses jefferson but it was written a very long time ago there are predictions things that says in the torah that are completely unbelievable and i'll give you a few examples the terrorist says for example the biggest about the jewish people you're the smallest of nations yeah you're going to be hunted down you're going to be scattered all over the world but you never ever gonna perish you will survive you will thrive you will come back to your people you will come back to your land if you were writing a book two thousand years ago three thousand years ago and you know that you're talking to a little tribe in a little nation and you're talking in the name of god why are you making such a prediction that completely doesn't make sense it's like most empires most nations have disappeared like why do you think your your people is going to be different you're going to be proven to be a charlatan imagine you get up and you say tomorrow the sun is rising in the west everyone is going to think you're cuckoo you're crazy you're a meshogenic don't do this and then you know god told it to me you're stupid tomorrow morning everybody will see you're a liar but then tomorrow morning the sun rises in the west and you said it the night before and this happens again and again and again another example this terror writes about the jewish people yeah that god told abraham so to speak or playing devil's advocate remember right you're going to become a source of blessing for all of humanity all the nations of the earth are going to be blessed by you you're going to become the guiding light for humanity are you crazy is this what you write here's a little small band a little tribe they're going to influence all of your matter who knows they're going to survive and you're you're saying in the name of god but you're going to be proven to be a charlatan guess what a few thousand years later the jewish people are here and jewish people in judaism have influenced humanity in the most dramatic and powerful way more than any other nation and group in history even though we don't constitute even a quarter of one percent of civilization another thing you predict that the jews are going to be in exile and tortured and suffer but they're going to come back there at israel it never happened in history that you've been away from a land for 2000 years and then come back why are you saying this in the name of god it's mama's like saying the sun is gonna rise in the west it's gonna be contrary to all reality checks doesn't make sense why why are you saying this the only reason you would write this is if somehow you knew it was true and you're not going to be a charlatan because you knew it was authentic the turret is filled with these types of promises with these types of predictions with these types of statements not a single word of it has ever failed us so this is one very basic and simple way of looking at this document and saying you know you can trust it questions are not the same thing as epicursus as heresy apicursis means who's invested in not believing and they're asking questions to justify their heresy but somebody who's really bothered by something if i'm curious if i'm inquisitive right and i'm trying to understand because i'm bothered by something that's not a precursor that's important to listen to and to address to put it differently let's say you have a question and you come to me and say rabbi jacobson i have a question and you tell me your question i say apicursus will that solve the question will that remove the question let's be honest and the answer of course is not only will it not remove the question it will intensify the question because you're going to tell yourself of course rabbi jacobson has nothing to say of course he told me it's up he curses so when we call a question up he curses we don't take away the question we make the question stronger and that's why it's so important to understand the difference when somebody is bothered by a question you can ask it you're supposed to ask it you're allowed to ask it it's no mitzvah to ask a question if you don't have it i don't have to put questions into people's minds but if somebody naturally organically has a question it's a mitzvah to ask and it's a mitzvah to answer it's the exact opposite of apicursis thank you this is where when you have access to unfiltered internet it's something that is really very very unhealthy and not because you're a bad person but because we're all normal people and we have to realize that we need boundaries in our life to keep us healthy if i eat every piece of cheesecake and slice of pizza that i see on the table it's dangerous even though i'm tempted to and if i go to every website that's available it's extremely detrimental both in terms of time in terms of mental space in terms of addiction in terms of education in terms of what i fill my brain with so i would encourage you to speak to somebody responsible who won't judge you maybe a mother a father a brother a sister an uncle an aunt a teacher a principal an older friend or confidante to help you really create the structures the boundaries the filters because to fight every day again and again and again it's not fair to you it's not fear to put something in front of your nose and then say go away from it it's just too hard speak to somebody who can help you do it without you knowing the password and and then it doesn't become a struggle for two weeks will be hard you'll have withdrawal symptoms but then you'll be more free you'll be able to talk to your friends more you'll be able to read better books you'll be able to relax more and your brain will be in a healthier place we need it we need relationships we need relationships much more than screens i know we're all on screens these days and right now i'm speaking to you on the screen and the gemara says you shouldn't spit in the cistern from where you're taking water so i'm not gonna stop making fun of screens when i'm looking at a screen but nonetheless i say we need much more relationships we need the social connection the social contact have you heard about social dilemma everybody says you have to watch social dilemma social dilemma is a new documentary that came out about social media and how they kidnapped the brain i have not watched it but i heard at least five or six people told me rabbi jacobson you're to watch this film this documentary social dilemma apparently it shows people what the architects of social techno of of of social media have done in order to hijack us and keep us addicted to the screens one of the lines that somebody told me is that when you're on social media or you're on facebook right and all these other big platforms you think you're the customer you're the client it's not true you're the product you are being used you are the product being sold to all the websites and companies that you're the product because they have your information and they guide you where they want you to be so you're actually a slave you are being used now just being aware of this is helpful i i use social media as you know i communicate a lot i teach and my clips and you know some of you know this but it's so important to be aware of the pitfalls that you should own it it shouldn't own you this little phone does it own me or do i own it sometimes it feels like it owns me it owns me i want to sit down to learn the phone i want to sit down to talk to my wife the phone wanna my kids wanna do homework with me the phone i don't own and it owns me you don't wanna be in that place you wanna be a free person and we need we need boundaries well you do have to understand if you describe this ms how is it so so many people i believe are believing lies you have to understand something and this is also true about us and about jews people often will believe what they want to believe i cannot convince anybody to believe anything even if i know it's true people will believe what they want to believe and what's comfortable for them to believe the way they're brought up the way they're educated the way they're indoctrinated and i can't blame them if i would have been brought up in a very different culture and faith and religion where would i be today i'm not sure we're so biased it's something called confirmation bias i want to believe certain things and i believe them i don't want to believe certain things so i find ways not to believe them it's important to understand this number one number two you have to understand that there are 2.8 there are 2.8 billion christians in the world there are 1.7 or 1.8 billion muslims in the world christianity and islam are all derivatives of judaism right christianity and islam believe in yetis mitzrayim and the exodus of egypt in miami so half of the world believes in mata tara and believes in yetis messiah because they believe in the bible they believe in tereshabiksav they believe in what they call the old testament they believe that muhammad was also a prophet and they believed that joshua was also whatever he was but they all believe in shatara so you're dealing here with half the world half of civilization considering themselves ears of a vramavinu spiritual ears of rama vinod the founder of monotheism the founder of yiddishkai now that's an incredible thing because ramavinu had no military he didn't own territory he wasn't a king he had no empire he had no massive army he was a man who believed in his convictions and he followed his convictions and today he is the most influential person who ever lived is that incredible or what so you have to realize that billions of people accept that as the aside however christianity took a lot of parts of judaism and rejected other stuff and put in some lies the same is true with islam when meshiach comes we're going to realize all the religions are going to realize that the good in each of their religions comes from tyra well thank you let me tell you let me get straight to the point okay after all the books and all the speeches and all the lectures and all this forum and all the explanations and all the insights in the world the ultimate and real answer to your question consists three words we don't know and i mean it earnestly we really really don't know we just don't know and actually it makes sense that we don't know for two reasons number one you can't expect a finite brain to wrap itself around an infinite mind if i were to ask your three-year-old sister to sit at the class of albert einstein teaching physics your three-year-old sister would come out of the class and what would she say this was the most boring stupid class in the history of humanity she's three years old you can expect her to enjoy a lecture of a brilliant world-class physicist and scientist even though one day your sister may be as brilliant as albert einstein i don't know maybe more brilliant so how do we expect that my brain your brain which is created by hashem it's finite and the gulf between my brain and hashem is much more than the separation between my brain and an aunt's brain i don't expect that an ant knows what's happening inside my life and an aunt understands what i'm doing how can i even begin to expect that my brain your brain our brain should understand hashem and hashem's ways we really really don't know in fact the miracle is that there are things that we do understand the fact that much of life we could understand and we could appreciate and we could say wow this is incredible this makes sense this is amazing that's the hidden that's the innovation the fact that there's so much of life that we can that we don't get that we don't comprehend that's actually very that's actually very normal even if it's painful so i think it's important to have the humility and to know that we really really don't know there's so much we don't know there's so much we don't understand and there's also another point here hashem doesn't want us to understand pain you know why he wants us to get rid of the pain of the world if i would be able to understand why people suffer i wouldn't get so upset i wouldn't protest it i wouldn't fight against it i would say okay there's a plan it's supposed to be that way hashem doesn't want me to understand why there is suffering in the world because he wants me to be outraged to be hurt to be crushed by the suffering and to do whatever i can to alleviate people suffering so maybe it's good that we don't understand good question if the terror is really the best thing for us why do we have to be convinced it should be it should be very obvious right beautiful question but i think you're intelligent girls i think you know the answer i know the answer because a part of me would rather just be lazy and be a couch potato and do nothing listen again when i see a piece of cheesecake my instinct is eat it if i use my brains and i use my discipline i say if you're going to eat it rabbi if you're going to eat it in 20 minutes you're going to be in a bad mood when i eat sugar and and carbs i get into a bad mood you're going to be depressed you're not going to feel good you're going to feel heavy and lethargic but my instinct my instinct says go eat it you know i know my instinct says go eat it because sometimes i eat it my point is following instinct is wonderful but we also have to realize that our instincts are very superficial i get angry i get angry i'm overwhelmed from anger right and i want to scream and i want to holler but then when i come down i realize that maybe i'm being immature maybe i'm overreacting maybe it's my own insecurity that's being addressed for this i have to go deeper than instinct and that's why i think if we look deeply into our lives we see that the terrorist lifestyle creates the most meaningful and normal and balanced life in every area when it comes shabbos marriage relationships with children even drugs you know what's happening we have problems with drugs we have problems with depression but you know the percentage is your mothers know that tonight you're an abc of project light but your contemporaries your age in the secular world a much larger amount are busy doing things that are very destructive and i know that some of us embassy akov are also addicted to different things but in terms of a lifestyle it creates a structured life that is most conducive for normalcy and growth why do people have to be convinced because i'm lazy and i'm not interested and sometimes it's a burden you know in the morning when i wake up you think i want to darven every day i'm not interested i want to go to work but i know when i take the time and i dab in with kavona it makes me a better person makes me a calmer person makes me a more moral person in the middle of davening i can be introspective i can take some deep breaths and meditate on where i have to become better on what i need from hashem today but is it something that i run to every morning sometimes i'm excited and sometimes i'm like not today and i have to tell myself go do it just like people who work out every day and take a long walk every day exercise every day whatever they do pilates or meditation it's not always instinctive sometimes yeah but very often i have to tell myself you're not in the mood but this is good this is wonderful this is going to bring out the best in you you like 60 more questions how much time do you have we have 60 more questions wow so let's go listen this is an important this is an important group you are the future of our people so every every moment that we spend together i feel is of infinite value thank you okay what should i do if i feel i'm getting influenced by people that are doing bad things if you feel you're getting influenced by people that are doing bad things it's important for you to create boundaries that are kind but firm and what that means practically is if there's a friend who wants to go out with you but you know that when you're going out you're going to be doing things that are not good they're going to schlep you into situations you don't want to be there you have to make it very clear to this group and say listen i love you i cherish you but really this is not for me and even if they're going to say oh you became a nerd you became froome bashaco you're going to the seminary you want to whatever they're gonna really they're gonna say that because they're hurting you know what i mean they're hurting inside so you have to be confident when you're confident with what you want and what you need you can create nice respectful but firm boundaries and people will actually respect you much more okay thank you um what do i do when people in positions of authority oppose my positive growth what do you do when people in positions of authority oppose your positive growth well that's a challenge um i don't know the details of the situation so it's hard for me to give a definitive answer but i think from just a general perspective i think it's important to try to understand why these people in authority would oppose your positive growth is it maybe something that they're unaware of is it something they're ignorant of is it something they're afraid of and maybe there can be a communication that will help alleviate their fears or concerns if you feel that it's an impossible situation and they're just opposing your growth for some irrational blind reason then the question is do you really have to be under their authority and maybe you can also speak to somebody that you do trust to speak to them to help make it better another thing is sometimes we're in a position where we're under people's authority and they don't appreciate who we are and they may make certain comments that are difficult for us and sometimes and i'm not saying this as authoritative advice but sometimes it's wise to lay low a little bit do your thing without everybody knowing it until you get through it and then you could be a little more free to move on and flex your muscles you know be smart don't be right be smart although deck schools don't give a lot of time to daven i really don't know i'm um and i don't know how much time they give to davin i didn't know that there's one policy for all this yakov schools i'm really not in a position to answer that question i simply don't know the facts and i certainly don't know the reasoning these questions have to be brought up to the leadership of basiaco girl and i ask the questions that bother me i may sound like i'm an epicarus so you have to know who your teachers are and who the people you're going to be asking the questions if you have and you'll you'll figure this out there are different types of teachers there are teachers who are more open who are more understanding who are more authentic and there are teachers who are more maybe closed and they're more uptight and they may be more afraid or they may have a different approach to either scout i'm not judging anybody but you have to make sure you're addressing it to the right person you know you don't come to a dentist because you have a problem with your feet right just like you don't come to a cardiologist for a problem that you have in your teeth so you have to go to the right person you have to make sure it's the right teacher it's the right mentor it's the right mechanics it's the right mora it's the right mushpia it's the right rabbit sin whatever it is you know don't just ask your question to anybody they may not be able to know how to deal with it and they're going to say shh we don't ask these questions so make sure it's a good person and maybe it's not in your school maybe you want to speak to somebody outside of your school maybe there's somebody in your school in a different class and you could speak to them you know be intelligent about it some people can't deal with everything remember not every teacher is perfect not every principle is perfect not every rapper is perfect not every rabbitson is perfect different people have different approaches some people you know are afraid some people are scarred some people just have a more you know a different type of approach they don't want to deal with any questions they feel that a moon shooter means that you're not allowed to address anything so it's just you know don't worry about it don't be resentful don't be afraid there's plenty of people who you can have an intelligent conversations with and if worse comes to worst send me an email and i'll address your question rabbi y yeshiva.net by the way i did an amuna series of 30 classes some of the basics of amuna and you can watch it on the website the yeshiva.net that's t-h-e the y-e-s-h-i-v-a dot net if you put in the search emunah series you'll see a series of 30 classes that deal with a lot of big questions and i think for some of you that may be very very helpful that was a commercial thank you so much okay we are told you can ask and for whatever we want and sometimes it's not good for us how do we know it's not meant for us or to keep asking for it it's a great question and i think that we work on both on both ends meaning if you feel that something is important for you and you want it ask ask but remember hashem listens to every villa sometimes he says yes sometimes he says not yet sometimes he says i have something much better for you and we don't always know what the answer is so you could continue asking for whatever you feel you want on the other hand deal with your reality in the most successful way so in other words i would love if the situation changes completely but hashem may decide that the situation is going to remain this way for a certain amount of time so now i have to embrace the reality and say okay i'm going to maximize my position and maximize my potential and maximize my mission here and you could still dive in for what you want and it's not a country it's not a contradiction depression is such a heavy word many forms of depression is completely not your choice completely it's mamish a test of life some people suffer from acute depression clinical depression various forms of mental illnesses which bring upon depression and it's completely not your fault then you cannot blame yourself you have to be kind to yourself and compassionate for yourself and make space for it and realize that this is a serious challenge that you face you are not essentially a depressed soul you're a piece of hashem but hashem has sent you he sent you a piece of his light into this place of depression to bring hope there and bring light there so don't be discouraged but don't blame yourself you need a lot of compassion for what you're going through thank you why does hashem create a world when so many people fail the mission i think that this shows us the power of free choice that hashem invested everything in humanity and he gave them freedom believing in us sometimes more than we believe in ourselves and look at the fact that despite all the pain and suffering five thousand years later the world has made significant progress if you study history about what the world looked like just a few hundred years ago and a few thousand years ago you will see the progress that has been made through the contribution of terra and yiddish kite and the jewish people it took a few thousand years but the world is going upward it's not going downwards it's going towards google it's not going towards destruction so despite the pain and despite the fact that so many people do the wrong thing it would be more painful for hashem to take away our free choice and to turn us into robots because that means ultimately that there can't be a relationship with us that means ultimately that we are helpless and hopeless losers and hashem's faith in us will always be even stronger than our faith in him i didn't understand the question i think she meant that many girls in our class finished so so quickly not feeling that pressure when you stand up to davintoshem take a deep breath and tell yourself that hashem right now is giving you an opportunity to speak to him heart to heart face to face tell him everything that's on your mind and by the way you could have him you know you can insert in every brah of shmaina anything you would like pertaining to that bracha and in shema koleno you can insert anything you want and you could speak to hashem in english or in yiddish or in russian or in french or in japanese and think that at this moment hashem says so to speak i'm stopping everything and i'm tuning in to you sorola sprinser ghani rifki whatever whoever zlati i'm tuning in to you i want to hear what's on your mind if you can got into that mindset so the fact that your friend finished after one minute or after 30 seconds okay that's what she chose or she's just too stressed or too busy or wants to run home but don't let that define you you take the time that you need because this is your moment with hashem am i always in that mindset i can't say i'm always in that mindset sometimes i'm stressed sometimes i gotta go sometimes i'm worried you know but if you can go into that place so then let everybody do what they want to do but this is your moment and i'm not going to give up that moment if the teacher is somebody you feel you can really speak to and be open i would just be honest and i would say you know mora so and so there's something bothering me there's something that's sitting on my chest and on my mind can we have an open vulnerable conversation will you judge me the teacher might say of course not i would love that i would cherish it please wonderful just tell her spill the beans if the teacher gets nervous maybe she's not the person to speak to what's a girl's mission in life when you don't have the same mitzvos like boys i would say every neshama has her own mission boys and girls but if we speak in a more general basis the fact remains the fact and don't see this as a cliche because it's not a cliche it's real the feminine soul among the jewish people was entrusted with the greatest and most awesome responsibility and privilege and that is to create the future to create the jewish tomorrow to create continuity to create the next generation of the jewish people the reason why women and girls were exempt from most of the mitzvos that boys and males were given they were showing him explained is because hashem wanted that the girl and the woman should be able to be focused with every fiber of her being on her deepest privilege and responsibility and that is creating a new generation of jews and there is nothing as powerful as significant as holy and as important as that going to show three times a day is wonderful learning shirim every day is absolutely amazing but nothing comes close to bringing a new child into the world feeding the child carrying the child birthing the child nursing the child raising the child and creating a home that is healthy happy wholesome the atmosphere in the home is what sustained the jewish people for three and a half thousand years that mission this is not you know cute rabbi is being nice to women this this is not being nice this is the deepest truth if you can ask a question what's more significant in history the people who go to shul and get alias to the torah or the people who are responsible in molding every single jew from the youngest age when they're formed when their brains are formed when their characters are molded when their dispositions are developed hands down we all know what's more important and of course this is not to say that women shouldn't be dominating and learning and men shouldn't be raising their children god forbid we all need to be we all should be doing everything and sometimes women want to get out of the house and they want a different career and that's perfectly fine but when you talk about a mission this is the unique element that the terror calls the woman akira sabias the foundation the foundation of the home and what what could be more important in every any civilization any civilization you know if somebody i was once giving a lecture to it was a secular crowd so somebody said that you treat women second class citizen the home with the babies i said you're so interesting you know if somebody tells me i am i work in a factory that produces pencils and i stand 10 hours a day making sure those pencils come out and recently i was promoted to the manager of the factory everybody will say that's amazing you produce pencils but when i could point to somebody and say she doesn't produce pencils she creates the summers she creates souls she creates lives that's not a real job making pencils is a real job right but making people that's not a real job that's it who needs that [Laughter] makes sense i have nothing against making pencils i use pencils and pets we love pencils although today not many people are writing but i still write i still take notes with pencils i like pencils for the swarm because i can erase it nothing against making pencils but when people lose perspective of what's really fundamental you know it's it's it's important to to keep focused and this doesn't mean every single woman is going to run a home sometimes there are people who hashem has a different mission for them and it doesn't mean a woman cannot have an amazing and incredible career and vocation yeah i saw joe biden just hired the one of our own but the point is you have to understand what the unique schliches generally of a woman is alpinator and it's ver it's it's it's not just nice and okay we have a place for women i i don't buy that we have a place for women we have a place for women we have a place for men and it's called the show we throw them we put them on the other side of the show that's the place for men and i'm being a little humorous but i hope you get the point how do we have free choice if hashem knows everything beforehand and planned everything beforehand it's a great great question i'm going to give you the most basic fundamental answer but i think you'll get it and that is hashem knows the future because hashem transcends time so the past the present and the future by hashem are all one if you watched me choose on my plate there were two pieces of food there was an apple and there was an orange and i chose an apple and you sought and then you say oh i saw rabbi why why chose the apple i know what he chose nobody's gonna say i didn't have a choice because you know what i chose you know why because you know it because i chose it i didn't choose it because you knew it you knew it because i chose it because you saw me doing it what happens if hashem could see the future before it happens so it's not that you chose it because he knew it he knows it because you chose it think about it nice yeah thank you i see when your face lights up i know i gave a decent answer a little bit mind blown what's the best thing to tell someone going through a challenge the best thing to tell somebody going through a challenge is i'm here for you i'm with you i'm here for you i empathize with you and consider me a friend in this situation the best thing i can do is be there for them hug them whether physically or virtually listen to them cry with them laugh with them and don't go over to them and tell them if you need help call me because people don't do that offer them the help be there with them go out with them spend time with them schmooze with them that's that's the first and foremost thing to do when you're facing a friend who has a challenge just be there for them you don't have to justify you don't have to explain you don't have to rationalize just be on the journey with them hold their hands with love thank you so much what would be the role of someone who can't bear children right the same question is also about a man and in fact a man has a mitzvah somebody who can bear children some people have infertility obviously they have a different schlisis in the world of a different mission in the world each and every one of us can be an ambassador of light we are all part of project light how we do it that's different for every single person some people only find their shidduch later in life it's not easy some people can't bear children but each and every one of us is a gift to humanity some people do it through educating children some people do it through educating adults some people do it through giving being involved with charity with hesed with benevolence with giving every person creates children in different ways the gemara says tell they say him shalt sadiq the children of tzadikim are their good deeds when i do a good deed i create a child i have an impact when i inspire you i created a child the gemara says when you teach somebody torah it's like you gave birth to them why do you give birth to them because there's physical birth biological birth but the spiritual birth if i give you life if i give you meaning if i give you purpose i gave birth to you because you're now alive not just physically alive but emotionally and spiritually alive so every single one of us no matter the circumstances can have an impact can birth can bring birth and life to the world how that depends on your circumstances and your mission but never think god forbid that you're somehow the defected person who has nothing to do in this world god conceived you in love and the day you were born is the day hashem said you matter if somebody asks you a hard question and you don't know the answer don't feel bad to say you know it's a great question i really don't know let's go to somebody who may know let's ask them they may not know let's go to somebody else and it doesn't have to be a physical visit today you can email them i told you earlier worse comes to worst email me rabbi y yy the yeshiva.net if i if i have an answer i'll be happy to answer if i don't have an answer i'll be honest with you so there's nothing wrong with telling somebody i don't know i have to think about it i have to research it i have to ask somebody about it we're not obligated to know everything none of us know everything anyway that's a good question how do i figure out my own purpose in life i would say a few things number one when you find the place in life where your passion meets a real need of people you have hit the jackpot you know sometimes i'm very passionate about something like i have a talent for something but it's not helping anybody okay fine you can do it in your free time sometimes people have a need for something but i'm just so not excited about it okay it's maybe not for me but when you are good at something and you have a passion for something and you care for something and that something is a real need for people that's where you hit the jackpot this i once heard from rabbi jonathan sacks who passed away recently the former chief rabbi of great britain that's point number one point number two you have to always look at your talents your resources your gifts your blessings your kashraynes if hashem has given you and he's given every single person unique gifts unique resources those are part of your mission do not waste them that is part of the light that you have to give over in this world number three you have to always examine your circumstances where you live what type of family you were brought into the world to what type of school what type of environment what are the challenges you have what are the blessings you have what are the unique circumstances that define your life because those are all because that is probably part of your because if i find myself in a particular place with particular circumstances that is part of my mission finding how i can be an ambassador of hashem in this place under these circumstances the last point i would make to you is when you find that you're having serious resistance to what you have to do that's probably part of your mission if i know i have to do something and i am finding it extremely difficult there is deep emotional resistance it's probably the eight sahara opposing it ferociously because it's part of my mission thank you so so much this was incredible thank you so much for staying and thank you so much for coming my pleasure thank you for the privilege of inviting me such a beautiful and great group of girls your questions were wonderful stupendous brilliant full of inquisitiveness and curiosity and i really from the depth of my heart i wish each and every one of you and tremendous blessing and success in your life with happiness with serenity with tranquility may you always be able to see the infinite light and beauty that resides in your soul and in your heart and always be able to share that not only with yourself but with your family and with your friends and with your community and with with the world and always see yourself for who you really are ambassadors of hashem to light up the world thank you very much thank you so much have a great night everyone thank you all for joining bye bye good night this class is brought to you by the yeshiva.net please help us continue the classes make even a small contribution at www.theyshiva.net donate