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Wigs and Judaism, does it bother me?

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Rabbi Yom Tov avatar
Rabbi Yom Tov

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[Music] Oh meaning to me to get back some ego with this okay so he's bringing up when observant women wear wigs that they're they're often fancy or maybe even nicer than their own hair I mean that's what happens if if a woman's hair isn't the softest hair in the world but there's money there so why not spend three grand and suddenly have the softest hair in the world and the and so that certainly happens a lot and yes what about it yeah yeah I don't know we should discuss wigs so much here you know before someone starts throwing darts you know the it's an interesting thing the whole wig thing I think this is one of the things you can trust Bali Chu BOGO many people raise non-observant they develop when they become observant they develop certain sensitivities to things and they and they one of the things they're most incredulous about the word incredulous is a fancy word of saying that they just don't understand like they just don't get it is wigs like if a Bali two of us don't understand what why women decided to cover their hair with more hair why are they coming their hair with more hair you know that just yeah you'd agree like that strange any other but people were raised observant here you're right you weren't raised observant way that a little strange they would cover their hair with more hair don't know no big deal for him why what their real hair maybe they're just gonna keep on the fake hair what [Music] we're just discussing whether covering hair with hair is strange busy you raised observant okay no anyway it is a little strange I personally I personally so far I've married off two daughters and both of them are wearing these these things on their head that look a lot like someone's hair and that is yeah I can't even say the word and anyway but well for me it was hard because because I was very excited to have graduated this little tiny kid that I held into an adult married woman like that was my excitement like oh my gosh what a what a victory like - especially in 2019 - take a take a kid a baby and and mature her all the way to full responsibility at aura home you know I go that's I can't think of anything that's a bigger challenge or a bigger mazelTov if you do it like a bigger victory everyone who said Mazel Tov to me that night if I didn't take the Mazel Tov is like Mazel Tov on the marriage I took the miles of toughest Mazel Tov on pulling off the ultimate feat the ultimate you know incredible challenge that you that you pulled this off and by the way I have a lot of friends who became observant at the same time as I did who made all the commitments I did and they're very there kids are all over the map meaning they're very far from being able to have these weddings happen at such time you know such timely fashion now I don't know who's responsible for that is that my wife is it me is it both of us community we live in is it the hussy do the Hasidic group were part of like I don't know how we did it I really don't know how we did it cuz you know I'm basically a meshuganah and but maybe yeah but I make a kiddush like I'm what you're gonna do and maybe that kid issue was like you know daddy takes Mitzvah seriously you know and they saw me shaking my you know my cosmic vegetation every suka sand and my suka holds a hundred people and you know I take I take these mitzvahs all all the ways I don't know if that was because I know other people who did that and kids are far from marriage able anyway so here I was having this victory so here is having this victory and I wanted that they she shouldn't still look like a Barra you know the buffer she shouldn't still look like a like a sink a buffer I was a Hebrew for a single girl I kept her all that the wedding happens and she looks like a single girl only in fancier clothing and and nicer hair it's like what about this is clearly a married woman here where's the victory and you know if I want to see the victory I don't want to just you're probably raised observant you guys tell a twig a mile away she has such depends depends depends but you can you tell him I the way I think different big you can tell I think what happens is it depends there's two personality types ones who noticed details and others notice how do you say it the gestalt that's the right I'm a meson saying I'm not seeing like what's real what's not on the detail level okay that's a French word means insane nice onsen I probably can't use that I love of words from because I'm a public speaker but that one's gonna fall flat on a lot of people I think I never heard in my life let me sun-sin what you say there's probably a good English I didn't hear which already asked twice it and asked a third time hare ego so so in power and that's kind of our discussion for today so oh yeah so that's the last point I want to make on this subject is here's something very interesting and and the question is and here's I'm gonna ask you all a trick question so I'm learning letting you know it's a trick but here's the trick question duh according to Judaism does a married woman have to cover her hair now obviously it's a trick question because everyone you know who's an observant Jewish woman has her air cover so clearly you know whether she wants to or not it's covered cuz obviously Judaism what would you say says you have to cover your air yes or no for sure 100% that was a trick question no no they don't have to cover their hair and what's the proof the proof is is that you can go to weddings not every wedding but most weddings lots of weddings go to wedding and here's a woman who's been married and everyone's watched it there could be two three four five hundred witnesses well know she's married now and she the rings on the finger the hope has ended the glass has been broken that me they've already been in the in the private room together and now she dances the night away for the next several hours were there Harun with her hair you know her natural hair is she married oh she's not married which one 100% married hair uncovered well when's the next time you see her if your family let's say right the next day hair covered or uncovered cover now you don't have to all yell this out at once but what do you think happened between the time that they left the wedding hall and the chevre Brazos please don't say it out loud something took place without giving it any detail so something took place and that thing that took place has now made it such that her obligation is now to cover her hair from now now why would it what does that have to do with the price of eggs what's the connection what is the connection so so to paint this picture I have to bring it back a few years and back a few years I mean that in two ways one is to take you back to you know let's say 50 years ago more actually 50 years ago when girls got married up much younger ages but if you go back 200 years ago they got married at much younger ages because 200 years ago and still in some primitive countries like Iran the their girls still get married at 12 years old but in the rest of the world girls got married at 12 years old including the Ashkenazi world and the Sephardic world and Jewish Gentile didn't matter you've got the girls got married at 12 34 years old because to be a woman is a vulnerable thing and the obligation of the father is to take very good care of his daughter and the way he takes best care of her is to make sure you put her in good hands and so as a wife to someone and that's why you dish the word for a son-in-law is a Deen ad what's the word ad mean in other word to aid any witness or testimony a Deut is testimony so a son-in-law and yet is just called because that son-in-law has testimony that the father took care of his daughter he didn't throw her to the wolves but rather he made sure that she got married