Wanna get high?

okay here we go Shalom and welcome to practical spirituality here in the holy city of Jerusalem at bem um I'd like to speak for a change about spirituality because this class is called practical spirituality and and if you thought about the word practical spirituality is actually meant to be a contradiction because if you think about practical you're not thinking spiritual and if you're thinking spiritual you're not thinking practical mean if you think about it person who you know is very practical you know he might be an accountant or something so that's not the guy you go for go to necessarily for Spiritual uh advice the guy is very practical and the guy is very spiritual you just wouldn't even get near him when it comes to practical advice you know like uh like this character outside who gets everyone to pray in the afternoon you know that guy's like I'm not going to him for like accounting advice at all but on the other hand I'm not going to a spiritual I'm not going to a very practical person to help me connect in prayer you know so Judaism is practical spirituality Judaism is is how to take the spiritual and ground it in ritual so that's why the words together are spirit and ritual spiritual spirit and ritual rituals take place in the physical world and spirit takes place in a nonphysical world world can you video Spirit can you video Spirit you can't video it can you video ritual ritual 100% and Judaism which is so ritual Rich ritual Rich it's so rich in ritual you know we put the rich in ritual you know and uh it's so ritual that um that it's easy to um can you sit in that seat please so easy to I want you right here so easy to uh to wind up stuck in the ritual and the ritual dies cuz what is the word Spire that wasn't five minutes you gave me five minutes I'm coming back I'm coming back really yeah I'm not so wait I'm just smoking you're going to smoke smoke smoke by the window someone's I'm going to bring it in if you're wondering why I'm doing that to this poor guy is that I you know I've been seeing him in the mikah lately and and you know of course anyone I see with the muscles of English you know your facial muscles say what language you speak so anyone who has the muscles of English so I'll talk I'll talk to him because young boy he's probably far from his family and stuff the guy looks I don't know 20 21 22 give some give some care you know give some love so I spoke to him in English automatically and he answered in English and at which point he told me the so I I when he on him next M spoke a little more to him next MC spoke a little more to him and I'm slowly like marving him and um and which means to draw someone close and and the he finally tells me that he knows me oh I invited him I finally made like a real invite like I invited him I think I invited him to this class but it was like a real ass you know he says he says no it's all right I I've known about you for years meaning we don't need to engage age further than this because I've known about you for years I said yeah but you you knew about me I didn't know about you and now that I know about you everything's different I've got him in here trying to get him for five minutes in here so I got this conversation happening when you all naked well we were naked but we were in the pool you know the water was like up to there anyway um um back to Spirit what is the word Spirit you guys ever thought about the root of the word Spirit what is the word Spire guys perspire expire respire what's up welcome there's a good seat for you right here yeah that's a nice spot right where it is like don't move it in a little because then I'll lose him a little more perfect perfect right so what does it mean it means ready for this a strange word the word INSP it means air in lungs air in lungs is the word Spire which is really interesting so like when you see something inspiring you're like wow like the Swiss Alves like that and um if you run you perspire your lungs actually push out liquid out of your body so you perspire if you overrun and you pass out you expire and then they bring that Sola com and put oxygen on your mouth to respire to respire so you guys have never thought about that it really brings a cool connection to Ritual because the word spiritual is when you infuse ritual with spirit Spirit without ritual what do you call someone whose lungs no longer breathe what do you call that guy dead dead so ritual without spirit is dead ritual and give a pop first give a pop just to practice your pops give a pop together pop give a pop if you've ever experienced dead ritual like where where a ritual died on you give a pop so you know what you have to do you have to resuscitate it you have to do resuscitation I resuscitated a Mitzvah my Mitzvah to filling was DOA you guys know what DOA means Dead on Arrival that's dob this is dat of bir Dead on Arrival dead on arrivals means when the emergency workers got there the guy was already dead DOA so my mitf film was DOA what had happened my friends and I were all becoming observant together and we all put on keas together and we all like uh you know started started wearing pants together you know CU we were all came into Israel and shorts you know and we all like put on senses together everything was going smoothly but then all of a sudden it became time uh peel off a few chairs for these guys we got some chairs over hereo um just those who came late I was just mentioning what's your first name by the way y Yan and what's your first name mus musi so and what I was explaining was my Mitzvah to filling was DOA Dead on Arrival my Mitzvah toil was dead what does it mean to have a dead Mitzvah to fil's a ritual right like every Mitzvah we do it's a ritual but for it to be spiritual it has to be alive it has to have spirit in the ritual Spirit ritual someone who doesn't have spirit means a in the lungs if you don't have air in your lungs you're dead rituals don't don't have Spirit or dead ritual so my ritual of to filling was DOA why because right when all my friends were ready to put on filling and we had done we had done everything together we were at every single shabas table together we had started learning Torah together we're doing everything together when they were ready for fing I wasn't I just wasn't ready I might have been ready in 3 weeks might have been ready in in 3 months I wasn't ready then and so what happened was they said oh we're going down to the cotel to have our first time in filling and uh one of the rabbis from ASA Tor is going to meet us there and we're all going to put on to filling and the rabbi went to each one of us and like put on the film when he got to when he got to each one of us he said he said now this is something you do every day from now on this isn't like a one time this is it every day and I was like he was like you do this every day and I'll never forget these words it was like a trauma and I was just like every day you know and and then he puts the F on me and it literally died right there it was D OA I wasn't ready and I was doing it for only one reason and that was because my peer group I was doing it because they were doing it now many years later like way later I'm still doing this dead Mitzvah this Mitzvah it was dead from the very first day and years later I'm already married I have kids and I peel off some more chairs please I was my mits was already dead and Ellie you want to sit you want to sit in I find it focus better stand i' stand I stood all my years yo how's it going yeah keep the chairs coming maybe you guys slide over a little no no you guys are good back there you're perfect keep going keep going keep going more more more right there yeah exactly exactly so exciting that people are coming to this sure this is really great I guess this was this is a good time in people's day more or less maybe we need food or something cu no most people eat lunch around now but uh maybe maybe in the future we'll work out a way to have some munchies come although I saw there's a bunch of food in the other room that's probably going to be there later anyway now already married with kids and I still hate putting on filling it to go even further I'm honest with you guys about my fear of rejection you know my social anxiety I've been very honest about that that my social anxiety is I believe maybe is the highest of anyone I've ever met in my life it's gone now I don't have it anymore but as I spoke about it it came to the point where they were going to cut out my Kish because they I was going to have my colon removed um for my social anxiety and and because of that I discovered what it was all coming from healed it and based on that started the Poss seminar for other for the rest of the world who are saying stupid things about themselves from their past and like I was saying about myself which was the word I'm unacceptable and so every time I had to be in public I'm unacceptable and therefore my stomach would go are you ready for this when I had to go to sh in the morning anytime I have to go to sh I would have to go to the bathroom first but here I'm going to show I have to go to the bathroom so I go to the bathroom but then when I touch touched the toiling bag when I touched my toiling bag I had to go again why because that was a trigger for the original time where I only put it on because my peers were putting on the film my friends were doing it and not because it was my Mitzvah and it was it was pretty nasty so you know what I decided to do I decided I'm going to do I'm going to bring back this MIT it's such an important Mitzvah what a shame to have it be something that only bothers you the whole time so I decided that's it I'm going to I'm putting it all on the line so you know what I did I took the um best Sofer in in at that point maybe in the world I mean this guy was a roshi Shiva he was a very his Paras were I don't remember how much today maybe a lot of people sell Paras for $2,000 but this was like 20 years ago and just the Paras that go in the boxes were $22,000 and uh it worked out really well though you want to hear what happened he um he said you know what I'm going to give you the Paras you teach you run your seminar the Poss you for Mya you just run your run your suer for the Yeshiva I'm going to give you the pares and I said okay I the sem's a lot more than $2,000 for H Yesa but I do want the pares and I didn't have $2,000 so so I said okay I'll do it he says but you can't do it every night it's every night it's Sunday Monday Tuesday Wednesday Thursday nights so he said you can't do it every night because I can't not have them do nightsat for five nights but it's got to be once a week I told them the seminar won't work once a week because by the time you come back the next day next week you would already put your guard back up and if you're thinking that you would probably think to yourselves someone who's paying to come to a seminar is saying I've got my guard now like I've come to do this but we have no idea how deep our defenses go you have no idea how deep your defense mechanisms are to protect yourself and the funniest thing is you're protecting garbage like in the end it's the stuff you don't want but nevertheless your system is like unnavigable like you need a bedin to navigate you your system's unnavigable it's hard to track where your guards up so that's why it's got to be every night anyway but I really wanted the pares and he was like no only once a week so I didn't know this was going to happen but I did it once a week at the end of the seminar all the guys in the asiba said we know something really really amazing was supposed to happen but it didn't happen and guess what happened I got the purchase and three months later I ran a possibly seminar in this building we're going back 20 years I ran the seminar in this building and guess who was there it was the regular participants and the entire Yeshiva wow and they miss five nights and nightsat and each one of them paid obviously and not coming for free and the uh it turned out to be a really a big win-win but I want you to note that I sat on the side of him while he wrote the pares I sat next to him while he taught me about what he was doing I was sitting with him when the pares were done I went and picked them up and brought them to the Checker to make sure his his uh how do you say sopus in English his scribe scribing his writing was you know we're talking about a feather with a special kind of ink nothing synthetic on leather anyway I I brought them to the place then I went to the box maker and I ordered very very special boxes and I put I put them inside the boxes and watched them sew them the meantime I was going at nights to rebies that they would teach me about the filling and so so I you understand what I did I I I just reinvested fully in that MIT and meanwhile I had a perfectly fine pair to filling I had fine to filling but but this was for the first time going to be my to filling that first pair that I bought wasn't my to fillm that was my friend's to fillm and it was a trigger of anxiety socially whereas this pair of to filling was my it's it's going to be mine and I've been wearing them ever since thanks for listening um uh what I what I wanted to share with you guys is um is the following you guys like getting high any of you guys like getting high give a pop if you like I love getting high without drugs I love getting high without drugs on life just get really high on life life but I wasn't talking about drugs guys I was talking about like hi like like I don't know dancing and you're like really high from it or or or um um a doing that was really really high uh an experience of the Cotto really high or Bo that was really high out in the forest by yourself or a sport that gets you really high or sporting events that you like to watch that get you really high um do you guys like getting high so here's the thing there's something called getting high and there's something called being high there's getting high rabit there's getting high and then there's being high which one you want you guys want to get high or beeh high can I show you what they look like on a graph I really got to bring in my whiteboard when I come back from America I'm flying tonight for a few weeks when I get back um and if you're watching this join me in Brooklyn December 1st M December 7th and if you're my graduates we have our biggest event ever a major banquet um next Thursday in a hall in B Park which is going to be super special where we're launching our premiere of the music video now now the um where we holding oh on a chart I don't have my whiteboard but what is getting high look like looks like this then where's it go wait got to describe this for you oh I'm just bringing my finger up high I'm bringing it high but what's it going to happen if I brought it up high where's it going to go it's going to come right back now right you want to see what getting high looks like getting high looks like this okay let's start them at the same place this is getting getting high goes like this comes down like that you know what being looks like starts here and it goes like this steady it'll actually get even higher than you could ever get getting high but it's not as fun it's not as exciting it's not as shiny and fleshy and and doesn't pull you in as much and it comes from hard work comes from going through stuff it comes through development you know we're all in a seminar we're all in one giant seminar it's God's seminar and he puts you through stuff but whatever he puts you through is yours forever when you get high is that yours forever no that thing that thing's coming right back down what comes up must come down but when you go through stuff in life that's building you as an individual and you're getting built you're getting built you're is that yours forever yes or no yes it's yours forever everything you've gone through that you grew from you could get kicked out of a car naked in the desert of Arizona 20 m per hour rolling down the desert like a tumble weed have you lost any of what you've achieved in your personal growth nothing you have it all and so for that reason that's enough to know that that's where you want to be you want to be in the development of yourself that's the place that's yours forever it's m pays and pays and Bay and Bay and Baye why do you think people are so vulnerable I know you guys probably walked down the street and broke or Manhattan or wherever you go and and you're looking at the people with the Range Rovers and all the fancy cars and the and the ladies dressed in like you know $2,000 a day outfits and and you know including the shitel obviously but the and you're seeing those people walking down the street oh sorry with the shape of that's already 2,000 so maybe 3,000 yeah okay $5,000 ladies walking down the street but I don't know if you guys feel this give a pop if you feel this but I feel it like it's fine Crystal on the edge of a table the men and the women the men in the big tanks the women in the five the $5,000 women I I feel like it's a crystal goblet hanging on the edge of a table because there's something about money and there's something about Fame and there's something about drugs and there's something about getting high that can but let's stick with the money side that can that you can easily skip major major personal development steps you can skip steps because because uh you know all of a sudden like you don't answer to anybody anymore and you just you're kind of above it you can pay your way through it and whatever it is sure there's a lawyer somewhere where that can get you out of it and you never have to deal with yourself and so you there's there's a way to skip personal growth but you're you're you're you're always on thin eyes you're always on thin eyes whereas someone who's done their work if you've really done your work it makes you impenetrable it makes you it makes you someone that no matter what came your way challenges throughout your and every one of us are going to have challenges because we're in God's seminar and when you lead a seminar you put people through challenges that's the job of the seminar trainer which is hasem he puts you through stuff to grow you but when you make that your focus so then what happens is you become someone who's High think about it we all meet High people especially around here lately but we all meet High people but no one trusts them if they're males their wives don't trust them people don't we don't trust them those AR people we're getting advice from understand the people were seeking of the people who are high not getting high it's not a it's not a temporary trip the people we seek their advice the people we seek to emulate are people who are high and some of these people are really high I mean like imagine re meeting Raba I mean really high but I bet you I bet you that Rab's daily would have looked more Stark than R um Aras more Stark than schlomo AR more starp than Ros and I don't know if you guys know any of these names of the you know of the gim of but they're like they were like machines in their daily aod they're up you see the light goes on if you live in their Courtyards which I did if you live in their Courtyards you see when I'm coming home from partying I'm seeing his light go on at around you know midnight 1 in the morning and now he's just going to sit and learn he's going to sit learn by himself until about Dawn which point he's going to make his way the migun it's like a very schedulable thing it's like happen like clockwork I'll never forget when rund CA who lived in two Courtyards over from us right now rindo Cora was one of the greats of the generation and um one night it snowed so much that the snow in yushan was already like 2 and a half three feet the whole city was an absolute stand still the snow was like up to here like close to your waist and L that night I'm sitting in my dining room and just chilling I don't know what I was doing but all of a sudden I start hearing little kids noises at like 3: in the morning and I just open my window I look outside and I see all the little Yami kids from these Courtyards today they're not so Yami but they used to be all these little Yami kids they're digging they're digging at 300 in the morning what are they doing so I I come outside my house which is like stepping up out my door it's normally two steps down this was stepping up and what have they done they have been digging ever since rundo CER turned off his light that night at around probably 6 o' after Mari when he went to sleep before 12: when he wakes up they had been digging a path from his door straight through kesa Olive straight through my neighborhood buta right past my door and to the mikah and then from back past my door and then across my Courtyard where my Suka is and then up the stairs to brightest and of course join them out there a little bit cuz I knew the rabbi would be getting up at around 400 in the morning but of course he'd be getting up to have his door blocked by snow he was in his 80s it wasn't going to go anywhere and when he opens up his door all the kids of the neighbor are lining the snow lining the trench that they had dug and there they were just like like that and he just without skipping a be just opened his door and his mikah bag and he just starts walking through this trench that they had dug for him and the but I I have a feeling if you knew Ru cook who was you know a colleague of his who is Ru Cook's wife who is she the daughter of um remember who R Cook's wife was the daughter of maybe was I can't remember exactly it one of the gum's daughters and anyway I can't remember but R cook has very high Torah but I promise you his aoto was like very on the earth like very grounded Beres so I'd like to share with you guys a hint let's answer yes again you guys like getting high yeah like getting right we want to be we already did that now I'm Switching gears we did you guys got the difference between getting high and being high okay getting high comes from doing things things that make you high being high comes from personal growth is that clear did that okay now I would like to share with you something we're not going to stop getting high we're not going to stop doing that but here's the thing when you come down from getting high where are you you're not low I don't want to say low but it looks like someone turned off lights when you're high your perception of the world is is so beautiful and so clear and so awesome and so energized that when you're not on that high anymore there's a there's a it's not a low it's just a who turned out the lights like meaning everything was in color yesterday today it's black and white and here's the mistake ofone makes and there's a lesson I want to teach you today here's the mistake ofone makes what do they go seek now what do they seek yeah they seek to get high they seek to get high right there that's a huge mistake that will turn someone into such a yo-yo that there will be not much left of them in a while when you are into getting high and I know some of us in this room are more into getting high than others but if you're one of those guys who's into getting high and you come down from that high which everyone does the next morning if you see to get high again right there you're going to set your life into yo-yo land you're going to be yo-yoing between high and low and high and low and you're going to be oscillating constantly and spending all your time trying to figure out how to maintain high without actually doing the work getting high sorry being high and it's just the wrong thing to do so I got the answer ready for the answer Moshe yes the answer for when you're in that black and white non-colored experience of on the other side the day after of getting high what you seek that day and the following days is disciplined uh what's the word of my fancy English word for someone who's disciplined every day um regimen regimen go ahead discipline regimen discipline regimen when you come down seek discipline regimen and have in mind some gut you know who had a very good regimen think of a gutle that you maybe read a book about or you got to know a gutle I don't know anyone can meet a guttle today where you going to find a guttle today it's like hey they I'm only in this neighborhood in nak because this is where they live so I moved in there it's just that they all died my wife and I are like the oldest people in our neighborhood at this point we moved here because it was all just these elderly sikim they've got regimen man they're like regimen and they are crazy high people you you're my age are you in your 50s yet got you're 50 Rabbi per did you ever get to meet some of these how long you been in Israel not long enough how long um I mean I spent I was here about 10 years that's not very long yeah very long were you here as a b as a b as a child who grew up here oh okay so you got to meet some of these so were they high of course they were high they were very yeah and they didn't need uh external yeah they didn't need weed not just weed but people Society to get them they need to be but they were very high you have to be internally driven you didn't didn't have external Society if you guys saw just the way they do shim I mean it was just like it was worth it just to I mean watching someone do shim should be boring not not in these people's case you know long long very long and uh yeah whatever so they very high people very high I mean when you meet them their eyeballs are like going like that you know they like they weren't born like that they've been at it for many many many many years but one thing for sure is that regimen the regimen was strong but what gave them the energy to make the regimen and what gave them the conviction there's so many different uh side variables involved with what creates these G right and they don't even exist these days so it's like to say to say that we should make regimens in order to you know become like them no what do you what are you hi not talk about becoming like these guys a copy not copying them not doing nothing all we're copying is when I feel like finding the next high I should open a safer when I feel like finding the next high I should get up on time tomorrow when I like finding the next high I should toil before I DAV meaning meaning if I'm feeling down because yesterday I was really high this is the day to get up hit the Mikvah hit ding listen when you're high if you guys ever noticed that when you're high you could show up late for daving and just do a and you're right there with the guys who started at lo you know all the guys who built up their Shak to get to Bar you know if you're high if you're already high you can like you you can just jump in meaning you you cheated you're somehow there already you you just jump in where you are and you're just like bam you know you're just instantly High I know a guy the highest guy in pins carlen the highest guy in pins carlen is uh is a guy named Yaniv nias and this guy is really high you want to by just whatever I'm going to be finished this guy's named yank n and this guy is like super high okay I mean this guy's like amus high okay and he's just a total trip I mean a total trip like if we'll go on a road trip to Reby shim or something for shavas and and he's making kidish L chavas he's I mean everyone's already everyone's already on the fish and he's still on kidish you know he's just tripping outer space tripping and meanwhile he's a he's a RBI mager in the Yesa he's he knows shatana of pin he knows and the one thing I noticed about him though is he only gets to his spot right in front of the Arna Kesh where he just starts really tripping he only gets there somewhere after Brook Shamar now you got to understand Brook Shamar in pin Carina is after is after 45 minutes of screaming so where's this guy been so I figured he must be doing some kind of intense meditation because there's no way he's starting off there on the level he starts off cu the second he arrives to that spot he's already like way out there and so I decided I'm going to ask him because we both walk the same street home we're walking up and I said tell me tell me Rabbi tell me R Yan where are you before you show up cuz I've been there since Lo I've been there since 7:30 I'm wondering where you've been you know and he's he says I was having a coffee because he's high he's already high so now I'm sure he's lying to me I'm sure he's doing all kinds of crazy stuff to get himself to where he's at during the morning but he can jump in like that and he does jump in like that when you're coming down from being high don't seek getting high seek stability seek the stuff that a guy does every day it's the exact opposite of what you think to do but that's what you do that's what you do and be careful if someone offers you to get high in the next 48 hours pass pass if someone offers you to get back high when you just had that moment where oh how can I get high again if you get someone offers you to get high skip it skip it get yourself grounded for a few days when that next high comes it's going to be way higher than anything you could have ever had why because you now you got your feet on the ground when your feet are on the ground you know the deeper you dig the higher you can build the deeper you dig the higher you build the deeper you dig in your regimen in your daily aoda but if you meet someone who's depressed I'm not talking about clinically depressed if you meet someone's depressed you'll probably notice that the one thing they're not doing right now is their daily aot you know yeah they're getting their to filling on but but they're not you know maybe maybe around or something but but they're they're not in their daily aota well that it's it's not that they're missing their daily vot is a symptom of them being depressed it's causing them to be depressed because they're not in the world right now they're not in the world you want to dig deep when you're down when you're down you want to dig deep into days regimen and there stuff that's the stuff you want to be doing when you're down and if you can dig there and then the next time you get high you're going to fly much higher because the deeper you dig the higher you fly this is why married men are no offense if you're single but married men can go places that single men just can't go because they they've got a home they've got like they're grounded they're like way grounded and and so now they can just fly you know like you know if if uh someone's leading a very high meditation he probably should be very grounded you understand so that all the people in The Meditation go very high it's called holding space like there's people who hold space for people and they should be sober while they're holding space for the people so that they can really anchor the group so the group can fly you understand that that you can't underestimate the power of being on the Cara being grounded and it works also everywhere like for example the electricity in this room has a ground and if you have higher level electricity you need more of a ground there's a sticker on my electrical box in my house saying saying like it's a big giant red warning if you open my electrical box saying do not skip the breaker meaning don't bypass the breaker because there's not enough rounding in this house for this system me I have a very big powerful electrical system and they just for whatever reason they weren't able to ground as much as they'd like to so they're just a warning please don't skip the breaker so that if things get ungrounded the breaker switch will go to that's all you know and but it's like the higher you want to fly the more grounded so I'm going to finish with the following idea that did I just say the word idea you almost never hear me say that word I'm anti- ideas how many rabers are like there's an idea in Tanya it's like you know why I'm against ideas because they're not real no no ideas are amazing and ideas change the world ideas are great but but how many you guys can give a pop for this give a pop if you've heard just a million ideas and they're not making a big difference at this point so so you'll notice when I'm teaching that I'll never give an idea without grounding it without teaching it how to implement it how to make it something you can experience you know if you if I don't want to hear someone's idea I want to know how do I integrate the idea you know I'd love to hear an idea but I need to know how to integrate the idea so I won't give you you'll never hear me give an idea that I don't immediately start talking about well how do you integrate that idea and so there I don't say ideas very much I don't use the word um just on that note I just want to share with you a little short guys want a YouTube short here a little short it's called the Primacy of experience tell me who has a better grasp of this room let's say there's in a university there's like 15 departments there's a lot more but let's just say 15 you know there's physics there's chemistry there's biology there's you know there's uh sociology there's there's uh there's um history there's you realize that if we brought in a bunch of professors who's the head of the Department of each of those different fields and they saw our class right now each one of them would describe it the chemist would describe it the physicist would describe it atomically the uh the um sociologists would describe it their way they'd all describe it and you want to know something every one of them would be perfectly accurate perfectly accurate but they'd be perfectly accurate based on a tiny slice of what's going on right now in here you got that who would have the most accurate them or you would your experience versus is their sliver of study which one's the most accurate your experience or their sliver of study the physicist Atomic description of this room and all of us in it you know it' be a bunch of chemical compounds or whatever is that is that what you're experiencing no so what I what I want to share with you is the Primacy of experience is everything your experience is everything and it's way bigger than what any expert could ever describe anything of so when they tell us to follow the science or listen to The Experts or whatever you're you're the expert because what you're experiencing right now could never be Quantified literally right now in every moment and I call it I got the term from Terence McKenna called the Primacy of experience Primacy means primary everyone try the word Primacy Primacy say the Primacy of experience Primacy of experience the primac y of your personal experience is the greatest measure there's no greater measure than the privacy of your experience okay the last thought I want to share with you guys before I fly is um and bless me to get on the flight by the way just to get on the flight because I I decided that to do a little keep have aim I'm GNA go to La for shabas and but of course I don't have a seat at this point maybe I do I know I don't think I do but the funny thing I'm flying with my wife and she's already got a seat which means she had to let go of our you know we have we had two seats mostly shavas so now she had to let go over her seat so now only she has a seat on this flight tonight can you imagine I get her to the I'm like bye enjoy my parents well you have to just show up like sh I'll show up I'll show up Sunday morning the same way you got do the C right exactly oh yeah no yeah don't tell me the odds yeah we're going to we're going to be on that flight and please God not on Coach not on Coach so anyway I can already feel my back you the so so listen um there's a great kazal that says as following when the elders say demolish and the younger say build demolish because the demolition of the elders is the building say it again you ever heard that one Ry when the Elder say demolish and the younger say build demolish because the demolition of the elders is the building I'm just talking about yeah so let's see so first of all who are the younger the younger is some hot shot Builder let's just go with the actual building the young some hot shot Builder and some engineer came and said listen you got to spend another $50,000 and dig down another 20 ft because um we've done some radar work with the Earth here and we just don't feel it's it's really going to hold a 30 story tower now the younger guy's like another $50,000 I don't have another $50,000 he's like could it hold and the guy says I'm not going to sign on it you know at which point he calls someone else to sign on on it because build the damn thing let's sell the units and move on you know that's the younger the Elder like they got experience and they're like like no spend the $50,000 dig down the proper depth get to the right Bedrock then build your 30 towers and it will be the demolition of that area now what if they already built the 30 Towers 30 floors what if they already built it and then comes along someone and says you know what I found a study on the earth underneath this building and it's it's not going to be able to hold it it could probably only hold it for about 10 years and he tells that to the younger the younger Builder what does the younger Builder do at that point no he hires an assassin [Music] the Elder tears down the whole damn thing and digs down and rebuilds now let's establish this in our own lives this is going to be on the heels of yesterday's class when I've got a bunch of garbage in my heart in how I speak about myself meaning my own personal Moy shamr and you guys know are are you allowed to speak um are you allowed to do a character assassination against a a fellow person are you allowed to destroy their character publicly or private privately can you do it can you walk up to someone and say oh by the way this guy's a good for nothing piece of garbage you allowed to do that no you're not allowed to do that are you allow to do it to yourself no no you're also a person and you speak 60,000 thoughts a day think about this are you speaking right now yes or no yes right now you're you're speaking sure of course you are you're speaking right now voice has a little voice in your head speaking right now and it's speaking to who to you and any of those voices that are negative about yourself are M shamron they're it's USA speak that way about yourself you know the word m shamra character assassination Mo someone who takes out shame a name raah bad name meaning to cause the bad a bad name on somebody it's forbidden it's not lanar lanar is to say I saw that guy in a bar the other night talking to some Lee that happened and it was not for you to say that that's Lush that if he wasn't in the bar and you say yeah that guy's in bar is talking to Ladi and he was never in there that's mie shamer that's just putting a bad name on someone that defamation yeah defamation FSE yeah it's false and um and by the way it could be even true when you're going around spreading it anyway the bottom line for us is that is that you're not allowed to say that to yourself tell me um raise your hand and someone tell me what is the prohibition of suicide in the Torah what's the prohibition of suicide not too I said raise your hand over I was going to think only one hand what was it say in English sat English approxim [Music] BL your SE fromal and it's brought down that interesting anyway but the bottom line is the bottom line is the prohibit the prohibition of suicide is Thou shalt not murder it's the same exact one not just like you're not allowed to kill a person you're not allowed to kill yourself just like you're not allowed to speak disparagingly about somebody you're not allowed to speak disparaging about yourself but what does itone do they speak like let's say this is the beautiful child than you oh we need a guitar um where's the guitar so is there one in here yeah you want to go get so let's say this is this is the beautiful child in you yeah this is like the beautiful child you were born as M like this is the beautiful child like the two-year-old gorgeous child and then what happens is he gets a you know the word means a barrier cover up something gets in the way of accessing him and what is that MO shamro speaking disparagingly about yourself as a kid what are words that people say about themselves I can't I well no it's about you I can't would be incapable so incapable incompetent not good enough not as good as your father or your brother or someone else um stupid ugly unwanted unlovable unworthy worthless small weak unsafe helpless hopeless give a pop if you've ever said any of these things about yourself what are you nuts what are you nuts are you your worst enemy and the answer is you're worse than your worst enemy why because if you had an enemy if you had an enemy even for 10 years you will have narrowed it down to like one adjective to describe them like jerk jerk or selfish bastard or whatever it is thank you so much so you would have narrowed it down to one word of of why you hate that guy you understand one word with you it depends on the situation you're going socially I'm unwanted uh financially I'm incapable uh scholastically I'm stupid like you got like a million things you're willing to like completely sabotage your character depending on the situation so now we've got now we've got if I can give it to you like this don't worry I'll keep an ey it so we got this beautiful child which is your Nisha that's your true neph that's like who you really are and then that gets covered up with all the garbage but who can live with themselves they're stupid so what do I have to do I'll become a know- it- all if I'm unwant if if I'm unwanted I'll become an Askin an you know what Asin is asin's a how do you say in English U activist but to help everyone you're like you're helping the community you're always busy helping everybody what happens in the end everyone wants you so that's why I'm asking if I'm if I'm if I'm a nobody if I'm a nobody if that covers I'm a nobody and now I'm in a Yeshiva environment I'm a mid now I'm somebody if I'm a nobody and I'm in a hdic environment Nam you understand so it's not just that there's one cover it's not that there's one cover up of Moy shamer of speaking forbidden about yourself prohibiting things to say but it's a double cover up because your whole personality is just there to cover up what you're saying but meanwhile the beautiful child's right underneath just going like help you see when the thing's not sturdy this is sturdy the beautiful child very sturdy when that gets covered up young kids the younger the the Young Generation says Bill I'm gonna be the guy I'm gonna be the rich guy I'm going to be the smart guy I'm going to be the goodlook guy I'm be the guy with the Range Rover I'm gonna be the guy with the with the no dog guy I'm going to be the build and he'll build on that and he'll build on that he'll build on that but the problem is the foundations's garbage Moy shamer the foundation's garbage self- defamation you understand but the younger just wants to build and just like every kid if he's embarrassed in class if he's embarrassed in class he'll learn right away like like here he was embarrassed and so therefore he's a loser so that beautiful child suddenly a you loser and then you know what he says I'm going to be the quiet guy and then you find that guy 16 years later and 20 years later at a kidish sitting by himself 20 years later just eating cougle by himself and a kidish everyone's talking he's just eating his cougle and you go sit next to him you're like why you sitting by yourself and he says I'm a quiet kind of guy you know like my space and meanwhile the whole thing was the whole things just based on some garbage embarrassment that happened when was kid because young people build on garbage young people build on garbage young people build on faulty foundations but the elders say no oh demolish demolish one of the great of last generation R zman breel you ever meet robman breel from pin car [Music] he came on sorry in HEB with with he would he would hold he would hold this book this book is called melus yarm you know what melus Sharm does it rips you to shreds it rips you to shreds and he would come to just to do Demolition and he would scream he told all of us at sitting at a table once he showed us the book and he says it's going to be a new z a new zman he an old man he was like in his late 80s it's going to be a new zman because the elderly say demolish and the demolition of the elders is the building stop trying to build on garbage and start building on the real stuff what's the real stuff the beautiful child the theuma so we'll do a quick meditation it's about 3 minutes long and uh call it a day and U maybe grab me someone bring me a chair uh bring me that chair I have no guitar strap oh here's a tragon I have no guitar strap today and you can angle this thing down a little bit you can just turn the whole thing down or you yeah there you go yeah just keep bringing it down yeah all right hey it's in tune [Music] again here we go everyone close your eyes this time really a couple guys can feel when you're looking at me so really close your eyes this time yeah close your eyes all it's a beautiful winter afternoon sun making this room so special okay let's all together blow out all your air through your mouth inhale through the nose inhale three four and hold your breath for eight 5 5 3 5 6 7 8 exhale 8 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 inhale 4 1 2 3 4 holding your breath for eight 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 inhale or is that exhale sorry exhale 4 5 6 7 8 inhale 4 1 2 3 four hold for 12 raise your hands to rest on your legs with your palms up Knuckles on the back of your pants exhale now for eight 2 3 four releasing any tension in your body 7 8 inhale 4 1 1 2 3 4 and hold your breath for 12 your eyes are closed but they're looking up between your eyes looking up towards your eyebrows and exhale slowly until there's no more air in your body and when there's no more air in your body hold your breath as long as you can for like 10 20 seconds and when you have to breathe you breathe when you finally breathe just breathe normally and have in mind the beautiful child that you were 2 years old reach out and hold him put him in your arms literally the 2-year-old you were when you were two hold him in your arms and Whisper to him the following words whisper to him with your lips I'm sorry I let you go sorry let you go you're such a beautiful child such a beautiful child it was a mistake to let you [Music] go just hold him and let him cry whisper to him it's so K to cry just let him cry you hold him [Music] tight Take A Smile as step take a deeper breath let your motor cool hold him tight let him cry in your arms get in touch with his heartbeat slow down to a c as your defenses fall feel your soul ref [Music] everything you thought now put your right hand close your right fist around everything you ever thought negative about yourself all that you believed now close your left fist with all the different moves you made fight and flight to protect yourself from ever being exposed for what's in your right fist that's all the stuff that young people build to protect themselves from all the defamation the negative selft talk hold it in your hands and go release your hands Palms up again Nothing Left to Fear open to receive setting free the child Bea for child you do a little dance sing a simple song laugh so hard you're crying chase a butterfly climb a mountain side once again you're [Music] flying the person of your dreams is coming into view nobody can take that dream away somebody who trusts somebody who shares somewhere like the child Beau child in you w [Music] w [Music] [Applause] [Music] w close your right fist everything you thought close your left fist all that you believed hold it in your hands Let It Go opening up your palms everyone you [Music] love want you to achieve they want to meet the child the Beau child in you the beautiful CH is [Music] [Applause] [Music] touch of the heartbeat of your beautiful child whisper to him I'm sorry I let you go sorry you I need you going forward whisper I need you going forward would you come with me promise never to drop you let's together I love you the child says yes as you hear the numbers one through five and five opening up your eyes coming up one two three four and opening up your eyes five yeah well that was installment number four I think we're at four classes please God we'll just keep growing and growing and going but I'm got to go away for a few days um if you know anyone in Brooklyn who's ready for a massive breakthrough in their lives so I'll be there Sunday December 1st and if you know someone in M of the country I'll be there on the 7th it's going to be four nights of super intense transformation work and and as I said I'll be here I think I said the 17th or something the 20th maybe of January it'll be after kanak and please God we're going to do I think they're going to bring me to do one big night here on Han we party hard and like really get high sh everybody you press pause please yeah yeah